Saagar Modi on Psychosis, Healing & Spiritual Awakening

On this powerful episode of Trauma Behind the Glamor, Rah sits down with Saagar Modi, founder of Conscious Talent Management — a man whose journey through mental illness, identity, and spiritual rebirth is as raw as it is inspiring.

At just 18 years old, Saagar experienced a severe psychosis episode that shattered his sense of reality. He faced terrifying intrusive thoughts, including the fear of harming the very people he loved most. Instead of hiding this chapter, he chooses to speak openly about it — not for shock value, but to break stigma and help others understand what psychosis truly feels like from the inside.

Saagar walks us through the emotional chaos of losing control of his mind, the shame and fear that followed, and the long road of therapy, treatment, and rebuilding trust in himself. He explains the difference between intrusive thoughts and intention, and how learning that distinction saved his life.

Today, Saagar is a mental health advocate, a spiritual seeker, and the founder of Conscious Talent Management, where he connects models, actors, creators, and artists with opportunities rooted in integrity and compassion. His story is a reminder that healing is not linear — it’s a rebirth, a reconstruction, and a reclaiming of identity.

This conversation is honest, vulnerable, and deeply human.
It’s about the mind, the soul, and the courage it takes to come back from the darkest places.

This is Saagar’s truth — unfiltered, brave, and transformative.


Saagar Modi interview

Psychosis recovery story

Intrusive thoughts mental health

Trauma Behind the Glamor

Mr Trauma Talks

Conscious Talent Management

Spiritual awakening after mental illness

Mental health stigma

Young adult psychosis

Healing from intrusive thoughts

Mental health in entertainment

Addiction recovery and spirituality

Mental health storytelling podcast

#TraumaBehindTheGlamor
#MrTraumaTalks
#SaagarModi
#PsychosisRecovery
#MentalHealthAwareness
#HealingJourney
#SpiritualAwakening
#IntrusiveThoughts
#YouAreNotAlone
#MentalHealthStigma
#ConsciousTalentManagement
#MentalHealthPodcast
#StorytellingHeals
#AddictionRecovery
#MindAndSpirit
#BreakTheStigma
#HealingIsPossible
#MentalHealthCommunity

Transcript

SPEAKER_01 0:00

Hello everyone, welcome to another amazing episode of Trauma Behind the Glamour. And well, I'm excited to introduce my guests today. But before that, I want to let everyone know. It's men's mental health month. And they're not just being a male, but we are happy that we can have a month for men because some of you out there, you are built different because you were taught different. You all think that you have to be strong because you're supposed to be a provider. You're supposed to be a protector. Some of you are supposed to be the ones that everyone should cry on your shoulders. But at the end of the day, many of the times you don't have a shoulder to clap to cry on. Many of the times you look and you smile to the world, and the world sees you smiling, but behind every closed door, they don't see when you cry. So I want to take this opportunity at this moment to let you know that you are not alone. Yes, you are strong. Yes, you can do it. And rah, Mr. Traumatox believe in you. And when I tell you I believe in you, I honestly believe in you because I have been going through it. I did not just become Mr. Traumatalks by just sitting here and just clicking a finger or thinking that people need to hear someone else's story. No, I lived it. I connect with you, I've been through there with you and I understand you. However, you see it, this is why I say, even though you're not a male and not celebrating men's mental health month, but whoever you are as a soul on your spiritual journey, you have done it, you have did great, and you give yourself a pat on the back for bringing yourself from yesterday today, as Ra Mr. Traumatalks always tell you. And I want you to understand, many of you are struggling right now, many of you are going through a battle, whether it's from the past that you have not let go of, or whether it's happening today. I want you to understand, working hard towards whatever your goals are is great. But you also have to understand what is meant for you shall never pass you by, and what passes you by was never meant for you. Just like there once was a man who had the blues because he had no shoes. One day down the street, he met a man who had no feet. And I want to introduce this amazing guest today, Sagar Mooney, as not just a powerful story, but as a much needed story in society today. Because his life totally transformed and changed into a different direction at the age of 18, where he started having episodes of psychosis. He will go through his story to let you know about the intrusive, harmful thoughts he had towards his loved ones as he tells his story. But that did not hold him back, as you would hear. He went on to help people with recovery when it comes to mental health. His whole entire aura and spirituality towards his journey have changed as he's here today, as the founder of conscious talent management. And he helps actors, actresses, models, and other artists like many of you that come on trauma behind the glamour to tell your story, to connect with the right people. And I am so happy to actually introduce this person today because at the end of the day, his story is needed, and many of you out there think you're alone, but you are not alone as we are all connected. Ladies, gentlemen, my rosters on Trauma Behind the Glamour, all my amazing fans on the podcast, iHatRadio, Spotify, especially to Shannon, and oh, I forgot the other person's name, Irene, yes, and also the amazing Tina, all the way from upstate New York. Thanks for the emails, thanks for the messages, thanks for the love. Apple iTunes, Amazon, we love you all. YouTube, Facebook, LinkedIn. Thank you so much for the love and the support. Every one of you, I give to you. Sagar Moody.

SPEAKER_02 4:33

Hi, I'm Sagar Modi. Thanks, Rajo, so much and Freddie for having me on the show. Um and uh just want to get right into things. Um, you know, I've been suffering with I've been suffering from mental health struggles since I was 18. Um, doing much better now, although things still come up uh once in a while, and uh I still uh man it but I I know how to manage it better now. Um but yeah, when I was uh growing up, I had a normal childhood. Uh I did uh go to a very competitive high school and uh I was um struggling with uh focusing and staying on task, and uh I had a later on when I was in my mid-30s, I'm 37 now. Um I was diagnosed with ADHD, but I had an ADHD in high school. I didn't really know I had it. Um I struggled compared to my other high school peers who all went, a lot of them went to Ivy League schools and things like that. Being of South Asian uh descent, uh I was expected to be a doctor or lawyer. Instead, I became a I later on became a comedian. Um parents didn't really support that too much. Uh um but yeah, um so uh unfortunately when I was 18 um I went to college and started partying and um like a normal person, not overly, but like just like a normal person. But I did start smoking um marijuana, and uh unfortunately the marijuana after smoking it for a year led to marijuana-induced psychosis, and I actually started hearing voices and uh wanted to tell everyone, but the voices were um not harm, uh not telling me to harm anyone, or um, and I was not a threat to anyone. Um in like it wasn't like the movies, um, I was hearing mostly my friends' voices um who were telling me to like come hang out with them and things like that. Um, and um anyway, um basically it wasn't harmful, and most people who hear voices are not harmful. Uh, just wanted to tell people that uh uh it wasn't like uh Donnie Darko. Um but I after a year, about a year um of hearing voices, um I was hospitalized for the first time, uh, inpatient hospitalization. And um I was put on medication, uh strong medication, and I did get better um along with after about a year moving back home with my parents in the middle of college, uh, friends thinking I'm crazy, but I did get better. Um and I after a year I started getting better because of medication and also like uh because of uh energy healing that I tried, a combination of both, uh called pranic healing. It's another form of Reiki. Um, and then also my parents' support and family support. Slowly I began to rebuild my life. I quit marijuana. I did quit nicotine as well, um, although I've been struggling with nicotine for a long time, um, on and off. Um and I continued in my 20s, um uh not overly partying. I wouldn't smoke marijuana, but I would drink on the weekends in my 20s. Then eventually uh alcohol caused, realized that alcohol was causing a lot of depression, uh, contributing to my depression. So I quit alcohol as well. Um did an outpatient. Uh at one point I was depressed. Uh later on in my 20s. Again, I was depressed, and I did an outpatient. Um, it had a lot to do with the work I was doing. I wasn't happy with the work I was doing. Uh later, I was also in my mid-20s diagnosed with OCD, and I was having very intrusive thoughts. Uh, like the common ones that people know, like germs, um, fearing that I was gonna die uh because of germs, later turned into I was feared that I was gonna die in my sleep of sleep apnea, even though I was um not overweight at all. I was actually quite skinny at that time, and um it was unlikely, but I thought that I was gonna die in my sleep of sleep apnea, and I remember one night my brother um, because I had a panic attack, had to take me to the emergency room and um had to take the day off from work, call out, call sick, and I was in the emergency room the whole night because uh I had a panic attack, uh thinking that I was gonna die of sleep apnea. Um, alcohol didn't help things at that point, and at that point I got got into an outpatient clinic uh for um and I quit alcohol. Family supported me again, um, although they weren't happy and uh they were pretty worried about me. Um I later on started having thoughts about harming my family, like uh picking up a knife and um killing my mom um because of a normal everyday argument. Um it's pretty crazy to think. Um, and uh I never want to do that, and I never wanted to do that, and most people with OCD don't do that, like probably 99% of people don't do that. It contradicts their values. So um actually there was a story in the outpatient center of uh of someone, some I brought that up in the outpatient center, and one woman was like um someone um yeah, someone actually killed their mom in um uh a gentleman killed his mom and went to prison for seven years. Um and uh I got scared out of my mind and uh I thought I was gonna go to prison. Prison has always been the biggest fear for me. It's funny because I used to do go on, I can go on stage in front of tens of thousands of people or a lot of people and perform stand-up and do comedy, but the fear of prison just cripples me. Uh, and to this day, um I still have concerns. Um, but yeah, any I uh later on I got I've been in therapy for years and uh I got better and better as time went on. I had a slip during COVID with addiction, uh, with stimulants and weed again, hospitalized again for the last time. But parents were like, uh, this is the last time we're gonna support you. They were very unhappy with that. Uh so that was my third hospitalization. Um, so that wasn't good, but ever since 2020, I've been, you know, sober mostly, um, besides a little bit of slips, and um been in recover addiction meetings, uh recovery groups like AA and NAMI, uh, mental health groups and um smart recovery, um, recovery Dharma, recovery refuge, a lot of groups that meet in person and online. Met tons of people, so we do a lot of peer support. So, like we I help them, they help me. Um, since I study a lot and read a lot of self-help books and positive thinking books and addiction books and mental health books, and continuously I have turned into quite a good peer support specialist. Although I'm not technically a peer support trained specialist, there's a trained um certification for that as well, although I was thinking about getting it. Um, I help people it with their mental health now. I give back. Um, I helped one kid, for example, with who's hearing voices. I introduced him to energy healing. He got much better. He actually stopped hearing voices as well. Um, he was also on medication, just to as a disclaimer, it's not like you get off medication because you want to do energy healing. Um, and uh to this day now I give back. Uh I started my own podcast at one point, but I decided to focus on uh and the entertainment industry because it's always been a love and passion of mine. But this I'm so happy I met Rahul because um I always wanted to do podcasts like mental health podcasts, and um, you know, I want to get back into volunteering um as well, and I give back by supporting others. Um, you know, I meet with people who have mental health problems, talk to them, uh try to try to be positive. I have a lot of positive, I'm always positive, even with my uh intrusive thoughts sometimes. Uh and yeah, so I'd love to give back a little bit about my conscious, uh it's called conscious talent management. I'm a talent manager. Um I'm not like other agencies or management companies where we're not gonna be, I'm not gonna just be um give you career advice and then try to connect you with jobs and then run away. I'm more of a friend. I was just talking to someone who wanted to join as a talent, and we were connected, and we were talking about yoga for like five minutes in our in our first interview, like, and I'm I'm not like other agencies at all. Like, I will be your friend and come out with you and support you, actually come out to your shows and support you, and but basically, uh in in in like like other agencies, I do connect people with opportunities, um, try to get them paid opportunities as much as possible. Uh, but some people need to build their portfolio, so connecting with indie films, uh, photographers, things like that. Um, and yeah, so that's the company and um conscious talent management, um, constantly networking. I go to like three or four events a week and constantly looking for opportunities for my talent. I manage about 15 people right now, 15, 20, constantly, and I'm looking for more, growing constantly. So reach out to me if you're interested. And um, yeah, and then my mission behind the agency or management company is also to spread the awareness of mental health and spirituality um and make an impact on the community. There's a lot of mental health and addiction and entertainment, unfortunately. And I feel like entertainment people, the influencers can make a big difference in the world by spreading good knowledge and good positive thinking. And if the people uh so many people look, young people look up to influencers these days. Um, social media has blown up, as you know, and so many people look up to influencers. So if influencers can make an impact, it'll make a big impact on the world.

SPEAKER_01 15:30

Well, welcome back to Trauma Behind the Glamour and Sagar. Wow, what a story, and it's so different. I love when people can actually open up and come out and speak about themselves, them their therapies, their medicine, the medicine that helped them, the even that you will institutionalize that some people are ashamed to even say hey, because back in the day the stigmas that surrounded mental health really, really crushed a person. And I'm telling you this because I grew up around it. I grew up around hearing a lady tree houses down that she's known as Mad Anne. You get what I'm saying? You don't know her story, that's all her name is because of her scenario. You think about we're living in society today. We have people on social media with schizophrenia that could come out and tell their stories to help others, and that is the beautiful part about it. Today BPD is open to a different conversation of understanding. You speak about spirituality, and before we jump into more of your spirituality, I want you to tell everyone about that kid, 18 years old, just before, just before you actually started have having psychosis.

SPEAKER_02 16:51

Yeah, uh, so Bahul, thanks for having me on the show. Um, yeah, actually, I was uh quite like I am now. I was very social. I was a socialite, not in the entertainment industry at that point. I didn't know too much about entertainment at that point. I was a socialite with my friends, and I was the life of the party. Uh um, I, you know, was uh quite you know quiet by nature, but at that point I was um pretty outgoing, especially with the alcohol. Um was uh crazy guy, uh you know, um flirt and um, you know, uh was a life of the party. All my friends love me. And then, you know, it's so funny because um just a year later um when things happened, um, I they would all abandon me. Um and uh they thought I was crazy. But before that, I was actually uh the most like a very popular guy and uh was known in school as uh a very popular guy. Um and I was known uh throughout a couple of schools. Uh Philly, New Brunswick area. I went to school at Draxo at that point in Philly, so I was pretty popular actually, and socially like I am, and uh very social like I am now, but um it was partying more.

SPEAKER_01 18:14

Uh wow, yeah. Well, I mean that's expected about being that age, right? So it's like you were living life, you were living the life of a teenager at that age, going to college, being around your friends, your peers, and just living life, right? Now, you said something so major and for that throughout life, and I say this all the time: you have to look back, you have to look back in order to understand, reflect, and learn. And when I say this is throughout life, people will come into your life. Your sagar Modi, right? And you know Priyanka Chopra, Jonas. And Priyanka Chopra in her book, she said that, and I love using this quote because it made so much sense. People are the passengers in your you're the driver of your car, your train, and people are the passengers that come on into your life the same way they will come in and out, the same way they come on to your moving vehicle and they will leave. And throughout life, if we do not look back at the times when we needed certain people that we party with and drink with and have a social life with, and when that time is there that you really needed them, there's nobody to turn to. And I understand that. And at such a young age, you were taught that because throughout life, people stick with you, they understand you. I think that they should, because everyone's life, as we always say, change happens. It can happen to anyone at any moment. How was it that your family dealt with um the whole introduction to you having these episodes?

SPEAKER_02 20:03

Yeah, they were they were very confused. It was all new, and that was in 2006, uh, so um years ago uh 2007 or 2000, sorry, 2008, uh, years ago. So it was all new. Um, they didn't understand mental health. No one in my family has had a history of mental health at all. So they were very confused, they didn't know what to do, and they were scared, of course. Um so uh, you know, my dad, uh, my uncle helped a little bit. He's a pharmacist, so he uh knew a little bit, so he helped um put gu, you know, guide me in the right direction. Uh we were put on medication, and like I said, institutes they took me to the hospital um and uh was put on medication. We went to a couple of different doctors, shopped around. Um parents, fortunately, we had um, you know, um we had uh good money resources to spend on good psychiatrists, so that helped. And uh the energy healing also was not cheap. It was almost 200 an hour, 150, 200 an hour at or something around there at that time. Um but they stood with you. They stood with me, but they were very angry at as well. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 21:22

The thing about anger when it comes to not understanding something, it is it is just normal, it's just human. And that's most of the things that happens to people in society, and I use this as an example, but coming back to the past as well. At that time we don't know that girl's story. Um they call Mad Anne. Her name is Anne. But we don't know her story. All I know from a child is they're calling her that. So the same with us in the nineties, I think it was like just around nineteen ninety seven. My grandmother or nineteen ninety six to ninety seven, she had um dementia and Alzheimer's and we Was just being exposed to that. I know it's something different from mental health, but think about our mental health and how we talk about everything, understanding the person that loves you and you love so much, your mother is don't remember you. Or certain things she's doing that you are not sure what's happening. The doctors explain it. But it's just new to you, and we are back in the 90s. So that had an effect on us. Whereas I saw people that love my grandmother get angry at times. And then when they sit back down, they're like, oh my god, I shouldn't have done that, or something like that. Or they said, or someone else will explain, hey, it's not supposed to be like that because she has this disease for Alzheimer's. So it's really good when you have family support that could really support you. And the energy healing, I speak about energy all the time, especially in this day with society, where a lot of people actually use the word spirituality. But what is really spirituality when you ask some of them? It's not about religion. It's not about hearing the word of God alone and preaching it. It's not some teaching that you got from Buddha or Krishna or Allah or Jesus. It's not. Spirituality is actually connecting with your makeup, the divine. And that though, that energy that you speak of, have to really, you have to really believe in it as well. So I love that that you actually got help at that point in time. So moving on, I heard you said so many things in that interview that we could talk about. Um, but let's come back to um coming out, you said at in the pandemic, you had some episodes, oh just a couple of years ago, right?

SPEAKER_02 23:49

Yeah, uh during the pandemic 20 2020 COVID, um, I had uh was hanging out with my old high school friends, started hanging out with them, the wrong people, but it wasn't just them, but I was in a bad state, and I started, yeah, I got uh addicted to stimulants and uh started smoking marijuana again every day. And alcohol as well a couple times a week, and then I actually got and then I ended up having an episode of uh schizophrenia or schizoaffective more. Uh the voices weren't there, but it was more like a manic episode, schizoaffective. Uh and I was very angry, and I uh again had to be token taken to the emergency room. One day my parents came and I like they took me to the emergency room. It was very traumatic for them again. Um and my brother too, and um brother was very upset. Uh he was living with me at that time in Jersey City. And um then I was put in the uh hospital again, uh inpatient, and felt like uh and addiction has been such a struggle uh um and uh at that point I was in really bad shape and then I again climbed out of it and got better.

SPEAKER_01 25:23

That's beautiful that you seek help and you climbed out of it and you had the support. One of the things you said though, and this is what I tell people about addiction if it's alcohol, if it's as you say, nirvana, or I had people who I know very close to me who um wasn't things like Adderall and stuff like that, and overdose hell. Myself, I tell my story all the time. Back in 2020, when the pain was so much, I found myself doing the same thing, smoking weed, drinking vodka all at once, and helping at least for opioids. I'm just laying there, lost and live just because you're in so much pain. But then there's always a wake-up wall. What woke you up to tell you, okay, what you're using, the substances you're using, the alcohol, the weed, the compact the comp the combination of the drugs is not working for you, and you should s I mean this is it, I don't want to do this no more.

SPEAKER_02 26:20

Well, fam uh it was a combination of a couple of things. Um you know I had a relationship with the with with my family, and I wanted to maintain that, and I felt so guilty about letting them down that I wanted to keep so stay sober for them, but also, and then that kind of turned into wanting to stay sober for me, and also for God. I developed a relationship with God, and uh He's always been a little strict on me. Uh, and I kind of like a strict parent and uh felt I always feel guilty that I'm letting God down when I when I drink and smoke too. So for God as well.

SPEAKER_01 27:02

I love that.

SPEAKER_02 27:03

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 27:04

And I love the part where especially you said for yourself. Because you can do what you want. At the end of the day, you have to make it for yourself because at the end, when I just said that story, I always fall in love with this part of the story. On August 23th of 2020, and we'll go back into it too as well. Not you alone. And I'm not saying this for you to feel any way in any sort of bad way, but not yourself. Millions of people were in depression and felt alcohol or some sort of drug or addiction during the pandemic. And I found it in a way that okay, I was always on the go. For all you know, my back pain was triggered because I was stuck. And I had a daycare, I had um your life experiences were draw, I love to travel, I was just shut down in a house, I couldn't even come out, and I was in a different place. So now I found something that gave me some solace. But after surgery in July, August of 2023, um 2020 on the 23rd of August, I woke up. And just about to do the same. Have coffee, have breakfast, go take a shot or whatever, walk outside, have a smoke, and guess what? I didn't use to smoke much. It's just a little bit in a bowl just to get me wherever I need to get. I didn't use the smoke joints, and guess what? And pop those pills and I helped put the pills there to take. It's like, brah, what the hell are you doing? So you have to wake up for yourself. You've got to understand tomorrow you're gonna need it. Three days later, you're gonna go through withdrawals. Hell, it's gonna take months sometimes. You're gonna cry, you're gonna go through might not have anyone to talk to. Because I went iron down and I had to get up back for myself. But I knew one thing I wasn't doing again is that. Get what I'm saying?

SPEAKER_02 28:59

Yeah, so you had to do it for you. Yeah, and that's that's great that you had the realization. I I I had the realization, and um, anytime I slipped, uh, I woke up the next day and I had the same realization. Like, what am I doing? Okay, it's just a slip. In the recovery circles, it's called a slip, not a slide. And uh I would jump back up and be like, no, this is not for me. I'm gonna talk to my support system, I'm gonna uh get back to meetings and and um gonna get back on on the on the horse and and do it for myself. Yeah, that's very important. A lot of times though, honestly, like I want to I do want to do it for others, like family pressure, and uh I'm like oh man, that's gonna kill me, and I feel like I'm letting him down. Um, but I at the end of the day, you do have to do it for yourself, and I I know that I can help so many people by being sober. That's my motivation.

SPEAKER_01 29:50

Well, I love that you said that, and you said that that family pressures and stuff, like I mean you'd be around friends, and this is something that I love people to understand, right? I would be around anyone that tell me they're in soberity, and you cannot. This is something you must understand and learn. Don't matter who you come around, and they tell you those things. I do not drink, or I do not smoke, or they're in that space. You don't offer them alcohol, or you don't offer them something because at that time you do not know the process that it went through. Simple thing that people think it's a simple thing. Crystal mat, it's a huge problem. Fentanyl is a huge problem in the city right now. And people on crystal mat, as you say all the time, the word in recovery is a slip. You know what slips they have all the time? And trust me when I tell you this, and I don't I'm not bringing out people's stories, but I have friends who uh who I see deteriorate. Like when I say deteriorate, I mean to say good jobs. Good jobs that they end up homeless just because of slips. Not that they cannot stop, but that determines some of these things are so bad that I'm a try. I have people who actually told me they actually were losing every single person they love in their life to the drug and they chose the drug. You get what I'm saying? It's so bad, it's so addictive in that way that I understand where you're coming from. And it's hard. Sometimes people will, you would say you feel that shame, you will feel that place that oh my god, I love these people, I want to do it for them. But you have to always remember that you have to do it for you, because at the end of the day, that's what happens. So circling back, yeah. What what you made like a full 180, like totally on the other side right now, and that's so beautiful. I want you to connect where your spirituality comes in together with your talent management company, and you named it so beautifully, consciousness, that conscious mind. It's something it seems like it's it's all that energy that comes together with it. Tell us about it, how you connect everything, the healing journey, and to where you are with being the founder of conscious talent management.

SPEAKER_02 32:19

Yeah, so the energy healing um and the healing journey, spirituality has been with me. I think most like uh I started listening to a lot of like Eckhart Tolle uh books like years ago, and and also like I joined AA uh years ago uh as well, and that kind of woken me up. I did the 12 steps. Uh although um I AA is a little bit uh it's a cult like sometimes, and I don't always uh uh uh adhere with everything they say, but it's a good community and it's helped people for sure. So um, and uh so that's how I kind of awoke in like a combination of self-study, e cartole books, other books, and also um and uh AA uh helped me as well. And um but uh I started off doing uh comedy and acting, and uh like I was telling you, I was a performer and then worked for some agencies, and then I saw that people weren't treated well at all. Uh models were not treated well, actors, it's very cutthroat in the entertainment industry, as you I'm sure you know.

SPEAKER_01 33:33

Well, I love that because guess what? As you said that earlier when I was talking to the studio manager over here, and we were talking exactly that how trauma behind the glamour was born. Because many people have stories like yourself, as you see that, as you say, you saw so many things that was let's just say it was not necessary that they were adding to people's lives, and you step up and you wanted to make a change with that, and the same thing. I wanted people to tell their stories of what's happening behind the glam. Many people see the glam. I know you see it all the time, and you hear it, and you know what a model goes through, you know what an artist goes through. So I love that connection that you took the time off to actually connect. While you're doing this, this is a questionnaire, right? While you're doing this and helping people connect and be let's say accomplish their dreams and their goals, how have you ever come across anyone where you can actually put that bridge of spirituality and what they're doing to help them move forward?

SPEAKER_02 34:42

Well, yeah, I actually I also manage um spiritual influencers. I didn't really add that part yet, I forgot to add that. I also manage people who are spiritual influencers and positive mindset coaches themselves. So one of the people I manage, um she uh she literally is uh where we consider ourselves to be light workers. Uh they can they're called light workers in the it's kind of woo-woo a little bit. Um but uh I we both believe to we believe ourselves to be light workers and we believe that through our work we're changing the world. Uh we're changing the we're influenced. So the entertainment industry we're we're changing uh the world. Uh because I I feel like it starts with influencers and the entertainment industry. A lot of people look up to us. And um the other thing is like you were saying, um it is it looks glamorous, but it's it's really hard. Like it is, I don't I'm sure you heard the story of Chris Farley. Uh he died of an overdose, and um, you know, uh SNL uh he was coming in to uh the rehearsals uh high and drunk and on coke, and um they said let's keep going, keep the show going. Uh they said uh let's keep the show going because um they had to uh to you know to make money and keep their jobs. And uh that's just unfortunate. Like I a lot of people are popular like Robin Williams. Uh a lot of people uh are really successful, and people from the outside think they're happy, but they're really not, they're really lonely and they don't have anyone to talk to. And I'm hoping that through my company I can I can connect and reach and reach people more and more people and support them.

SPEAKER_01 36:30

And I really love that because it's needed. You know, you talk about um SNL and you talk about Robert Williams and Robert Williams, and he really struggled, and people don't understand this. As you say, he smiled for the world as I opened with today, because only yesterday I was reading something about him and what his wife said and the documentary she dedicated to him. And coming along wrong, I'm I'm I'm as I said, everybody thinks and don't understand why I'm which I have my book Believe coming out. And throughout my spirituality, when I mean this is a TV show, so we're coming back around with Chan and Shan and Dorothy making us all recipes. She went through a really tough time with alcohol and addiction. And she stood on a sets drunk, it was a really sad time for her as well. So I understand many people go through this in the talent world. You hear a lot of people go out to sing, to model, they go out to act, and they have some sort of stimulant. So in this world today, change is needed as you're doing, and this is amazing. And I love, love this chat and sitting down with you to understand, to let others understand, they are not alone. Tell us, tell the audience where they can find you and what is your goal and with your talent agency.

SPEAKER_02 37:52

Yeah, you can find me on Instagram at conscious talent management and um also on Facebook, the same name. Um and uh those are I mainly use Instagram um at Conscious Talent Management, and the goal right now is to I'm gonna keep expanding my roster, so I am looking for new talent. Um, you know, models, actors, actresses, creators, influencers. If you're a spiritual influencer, uh motivational speaker, it's all good. I'm looking for to add more talent um uh currently. So and yeah, like uh the goal is to, as a traditional agency, is is to connect people with you know opportunities to grow their portfolios, grow their careers, paid opportunities as like as normal agency would. Um but it's also to support them and actually care about them and grow their careers, like and um not take advantage of them and and show them that there can be care and um support in the entertainment industry.

SPEAKER_01 38:54

Oh, I love that. That that and it comes from inside. It has to be, and this is what I talk about, the lived experience that we have, we share it with others. And this is something that you didn't want for yourself. You understood where it was what was happening to you, and you want others to understand, hey, you're not a woman. I love love that. Uh, two more questions before we go. One was what advice do you have for young directors and producers? Because I saw you have a short film and it really did well. Uh tell us a little bit about those. Uh it's two short films, right? So you can tell them about that.

SPEAKER_02 39:29

Yeah, it's uh it was a short uh show. It was a sitcom actually that we did, a vignette style sitcom. And um I do have uh advice is uh you know, collap like be patient first. Be patient, um keep writing, keep writing, keep producing, um, keep practicing. It's very important, and um also uh be careful. Like I got I got taken advantage of someone promised me in the world and told me that uh they could connect me with the biggest producers in the world, and uh I paid him money and I got taken advantage of. So be careful out there. Um I know people will prey on the desperation. Yes, uh, they'll prey on the desperation.

SPEAKER_01 40:15

And uh lastly, unfortunately it sucks, but doing the social media work is just as important as doing the writing and uh well I I went to Alan where you said that because just yesterday I followed this um this star and he's uh he's in I think Bollywood series and stuff, and he's also an actor, and he's coming up and he was telling that story whereas I went to be interviewed by his director, but the minute I'm walking in the door, he's like, Ah, Karen, Karen, yes, I just have my next interview. Karen, hold on. So the guy now is excited because he's thinking he's talking about Karen, he's talking to Karen Johar. And it's like this big Bollywood directory, and you're like, So this person that's walking in a model now, he's like, yo, he's really connected. And again, people are easily scammed into certain places because they want to get somewhere, they invest in themselves, and this is where I think people, scammers, kind of like feed off of that energy and they take advantage, and it's sad, do not take advantage of others because they work hard for what they have when they invest in themselves. And lastly, where if you had to go back, just like right now, I am with a traumatops, and I have to go to a university, let's say we're going down to New York University, and we have to talk to 250 students on stage, and they are all between the ages of 18 to 21. What are you gonna tell them? Because of the 250 of them, 75%, 50 to 75% of them are doing some sort of drugs because that's an experimental time. When I say drugs, alcohol, it could be something popping an ecstasy and Molly. Right now we're in a city where it's overwhelmed by everything, and again, hair pressure is a different thing hanging out with a door crowd. What message when you look into the camera that you could tell these people and say, hey, wake up the same way you're holding that mic on stage and you're watching all of them in their eyes, and you want them to hear you?

SPEAKER_02 42:26

Yeah, as an 1821, I know it's a very hard time, but uh it's I would say just keep investing in yourself growth. Um I know you have to study a lot and you have parties, but keep investing in yourself growth, keep learning things, not what they to only teach you in school, but keep learning things like uh uh personal growth stuff, uh spirituality, whatever you believe in. It could even be Tony Robbins work, um, personal motivational coaches. Uh, I feel like I learned so much studying on my own, and I didn't learn much in com as much as I did in school. And because of that, um, that helped me get it myself out of bad situations. And um, if you do use, try to use the less sweet drugs. I know if you have to use, try to don't get hooked on the strongest stuff. Uh use it in moderation and use very little, and try to get out of that habit as soon as you can. Um, trust me, you don't want to you don't want that habit. Uh uh you you know, you don't want that habit with you. It doesn't lead to anything good, but uh try to get out of it as soon as you can and also hang out with the right people and uh hang out with people who are supportive and kind and and hang out with the right people instead of the the people who are who will let you down.

SPEAKER_01 43:48

So I love that message. Hang out with the right crowd, make sure you understand who you are in society because that's a big thing for a lot of people, and people will make mistakes, you all will make mistakes at some time in your life, but at the end of the day, you have to live. Every step is a learning opportunity, and remember you can, you shall, you will, don't matter what your goal is at the end of the day, put your mind, your heart towards it, and keep believing. Believe in you, and you would see a great difference. However, before we go, we have these beautiful little sayings on here. Make it happen, believe in yourself, be positive, and never give up.

SPEAKER_00 44:30

If you have to choose two of them, give two things quickly on any of the two. What would you say? If I told you, believe in yourself, what would you say quickly? Rebuttle.

SPEAKER_02 44:39

Believe in yourself. Uh, all your thoughts should be very confident. Uh, if you have no doubt, you can manifest anything you want. Amazing. And let's just say you choose one out of the other three. Never give up. Never give up. Rebuttle. That one, if no matter how many times you slip up, keep going. Because if you start thinking uh you quit, that's gonna make everything worse. Just keep going no matter what. I love it.

SPEAKER_01 45:05

Everyone of you, you heard the motivation today from someone who has been through it. Not just you're hearing someone's story and go like, oh no, listen to this story today. Those of you on the podcast, those of you listening, watching on YouTube, anyway, please share the story today. If it doesn't resonate with you, someone in your life might need to hear it to be able to overcome what they are stuck on. And remember, you are not alone. This is RA, Mr. Trauma Talks and the amazing saga Modi. We are here to tell you, we support you, and if you need to contact us, contact us at y-le-w-r-eh at gmail.com and know that we love you and we believe in you. This is raw.