109 - Alex Giffin: Go Get a B!

Join BSN undergraduate academic advisor and “Farmy Brat/Everywhere” native Honored Guest Alex Giffin as she discusses her passion for supporting nursing students, why she’s chasing a terminal degree, how circumstances never actually get easier (but are achievable), navigating professional and personal challenges, being honest and transparent with peers, advising students to “go get a B,” resilience, how her family informs who she has become, and more!

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Transcript

0:01

Hello and welcome to today's episode of the Feeding Our Young podcast. So in real time as you're listening to this, this is today for you. Of course it's today for me, but today for me was a long time ago. And this particular today has me seated for three honored guest recording sessions, each from a different facet of my life, one of which being, I don't even know them at all. And then now we're going into session number two. Why is that important? Because you already know that I can fly off the seat of my cuff. But today's a very special day. I ran a half marathon number 184 after sleeping two and three-quarter hours Which is of course the smart thing to do so I don't know I've already apologized to our today's honored guests in advance because who knows what's coming out of this mouth today We're gonna have a great time in fact our honored guest, I'm just gonna let her run the show I'm gonna just go climb into bed. I'm gonna take a nap. She's got this she's in self-direct ask the questions, all the things. It'll be great. So without further ado, let me introduce to you one Alex Giffin. Alex, how the heck are you this fine? Is it afternoon now? Yes, it is. Almost. I'm doing good. Yeah, I'm tired too. I drank a new tea last night that was supposed to give me dreams and I don't remember my dreams but I am exhausted today. So obviously I did something fun last night in my Interesting. This is a, I kind of, that's a perfect marketing idea to market a tea that gives you dreams. Like, well, I don't remember them. Well, yeah, but they gave you dreams. You must have. It's like, like being a weatherman, right? Weatherman, weatherwoman. Like, well, it's probably supposed to rain, but if it doesn't, ah, I was wrong. Okay. So let's just cut to the chase. So let's start with the easy questions. We've already established who you are. But where is home for you? Where are you from there, Alex? I'm actually from everywhere. My best friend a couple years ago coined the term, Farmy Brat. My father is a pharmacy professor, so he moved us all around the country when I was a child. So we started in Pullman, Washington. We moved to Boston, Massachusetts, and then off to Seattle, then from Seattle back to Pullman, then down to Atlanta, Georgia. for a couple of years and then we were in Missoula, Montana where I graduated from high school and met my husband. So, everywhere. Also, you said you were tired. I've already established that I ran, and just hearing that, I guess we're done. It's time to take a nap. Just kidding. All right, so, wow. All right, well then let's lead into the of course follow-up question, and that is what degrees do you hold and when did you get them? My undergraduate degree is in applied psychology, so research-focused psychology. I wanted to be a counselor. That was really what I wanted to do with my undergraduate degree, but I had the fortunate and timely outcome of becoming pregnant my last semester of college in my undergraduate, so I waddled across the stage and then I would stay at home mom for five years with two children. So I am just getting back to school right now and I will be graduating this May with a master's in organizational leadership. And in fall, I will be starting a PhD in leadership studies. Oh my gosh. That would be incredible, Alex, but I didn't hear any nursing in there. Aren't you a nurse? Wait! What? Oh, hold on. Oh. I glanced over that part of that. Well, all right. Thanks for playing, Alex. This has been good. No, I'm just kidding. I got permission. Everybody's like, oh wow. Okay, tired Eric is kind of an No, no, no, no, no. Tired Eric got permission to do that. No, Alex wrote me, she's like, you do know I'm not a nurse, right? But I have a hunch you work with at least nursing students. that be accurate? What role do you serve currently? I am the undergraduate academic advisor for the BSN program here at Gonzaga University. Amazing. So, Air Go, our connection to nursing students and the fact that Alex is an incredibly inspiring human being. And so, that is enough to qualify her to get on this podcast. And that's when she texted me and said, oh, you do know I'm not like, I don't have a nursing degree. You know that, right? And I'm like, well, I don't, I thought I knew that, but now it's confirmed and yeah, we're good. You're not the only non-nurse to show up on the old podcast here. So very excited for this and what we have to talk about. So we still get to ask our opening questions because they're still applicable. Alex, you chose three words to describe nursing school. Just very briefly, what were those three words that you chose? The three words that I decided on were rigorous self-exploration. rigorous self-exploration. Love it! We'll talk about those at the end of the episode as we always do. And you have three favorite songs in life right now. Yes, so I've been listening to over and over again as my YouTube music recap told me. Bin Like This by Meghan Trainor. That is like my top song. And then Shut Up by Jessie Reyes. And then finally Hello Weekend by Biscuits and Gravy. Man, I love it. Sorry, that was low-hanging fruit. I had, it's the dad joking me. I gotta pluck it when it's there and when it's ripe, absolutely. And the one question you can verify you've not prepared for, correct? The one that I'm going to spring on you, but I did warn you and get your permission to spring on you the unofficial feeding our young personality test. So with that, are you prepared to answer five questions you've never heard before? I'm as prepared as I can be. what is that? You can go as quick as you want, can give rationale if you need, but we're going to know all about you by the time we're done. Are you Team Pie or Team Cake? Bye. Would you rather instantly learn a new language or an instrument? Language. Would you rather have the ability to fly or breathe underwater? fly. That one took a little more thought. Is Wham's song titled Last Christmas actually a Christmas song? Of course it is. That's in real. And, and, you've been gifted a time machine. Congratulations. Are you gonna go back in time or are gonna go see the future? Future's a little scary, I don't know about that. Let's go back to the past. She's going back to the past. And the results are in. You are amazing. Congratulations. Yes, it's official. I know you suspected for a long time, but now it's official. call your mom, call your dad, call your family, call whoever. Call your husband, call your kids. Let them know how amazing you are. They already know. What are we talking about? All right, so let's continue on with these nice little opening questions here. We have some fun icebreakers. Haven't got to ask them of everybody, so it's just kind of fun when people are like, ooh, I like this one. Let's just go right off with what is your superpower, Alex? Besides the obvious and the role that you serve, but what is your superpower? When I read that question, I thought for a little while I was trying to come up with something funny, which is actually my superpower, humor. I use humor at every interjection that I possibly can, even in really inappropriate scenarios I use humor. It's just always there when I'm presenting in front of students, and oddly, freshmen don't find me very funny, even though I say really funny things. But sophomores think that I'm hilarious. There's something that happens in their brain between 18 and 19 when they think I'm funny. Or they just need a little more time with the humorous Alex to go, oh, I see, no, that's very wise, she is very funny. I was gonna say, I'm glad you mentioned the inappropriate times, because I was just gonna ask if I can go to a funeral with you, next funeral, whatever that is. That's a weird question, but yeah, I bet, I bet, this would, I don't know if anybody would appreciate you and I attending a funeral together, that may be the issue there, so. I feel like I've seen this on a TV show before and it didn't go well. Alright, so with that, when you're not busy, so let's start there actually. You've explained what your role is by title. What are your responsibilities in that role? How do you serve nursing students in your capacity? So working title wise is what I'm going to start with in my answers here. Working title, I am required to meet with freshmen and sophomores twice a year, go over their progression plans, make sure that they're ready to enter into upper division. They've taken all of their classes they need to take. They're not struggling, needing tutoring or different accommodations. So working title wise, that's my job. That's what I do. However, I've expanded that job now to be more inclusive. have amazing work study students. I have two that are graduating this May with me, same day. And one of them has partnered with me to create a mentoring program for our students. We have these community events like scavenger hunts where they get to go find resources with groups and win prizes. I've expanded it to having weekly meetings with some of the students that want to have weekly meetings with me, going on coffee dates, those kinds of things. And just being more supportive of the whole person, which that's the mission of Gonzaga. focusing on the whole person is what my job is and making sure that I'm taking care of the students that are sent to us by their parents at 18 years old, which is terrifying. They're professional students the moment they step on this campus and I'm trying to get them to understand that and it's a big job. So I do a lot. And then non-working title, having nothing to with advising. I also am just, I used to work at College of Medicine at Washington State University and I worked in assessment. So for some reason I fell in love with assessment, which is, know, exams, assignments, all of those things. We also worked on accreditation and I apparently fell in love with those things and I love doing things with data and reporting and I'm really nerdy when it comes to those things. So I've immersed myself into all of that here in the nursing department as well. So yeah, it's a big jump. What are your hobbies and interests? What keeps you occupied? So I picked up knitting while I was pregnant with my daughter. She's eight. So I've been knitting now for eight years and I'm expanding into making sweaters. My work study students are the unfortunate few that get to receive those sweaters. I think this is way too small for an average person. here, this will fit you. So I knit. I also am an advocate to rewatch. early 2000s, late 90s TV shows from the CW over and over again every year. So I, you know, the typicals, know, Gilmore Girls, Buffy the Vampire Slayer, you know, the... I have to know, did Smallville work its way in there at all? I don't watch it as often. I'm not in love with it as much, but it occasionally sprinkles in there once in a while. It qualifies for sure. Yeah. And then I love dancing. I've always loved dancing. Dancing is my release. It's my stress release. I love dancing. So I love just whenever I can dance, I dance. Awesome, that's amazing. And those are the things that keep you moving and keep you happy, right? Yeah, I mean besides of course your lovely family. We're talking about family. Do you want to share anything? What do you want to share about your family that they'd be okay with sharing? I have two wonderful children. I have a 10-year-old Mason and an eight-year-old Charlotte. We call her Charlie. They keep me going. Charlie loves dancing with me. Mason is tap dancing now. And Charlie is a ballerina, so dance is a part of our lives constantly. And I, this weekend, am celebrating my 18-year dating anniversary with my husband. So... Yeah, Braxton. I have a very lovely life. I have very amazing family that's extremely supportive of all of the endeavors that I throw myself into, like doing grad school on top of a full-time job. what made you decide to go that far? Like why seek the terminal degree and what's in that for you? So when I was at Washington State University, I actually applied for the cultural studies and social thought doctorate over there and got into their program and started it. And then when I transferred from WSU to Gonzaga, I lost my waiver. So the money portion coming over here to Gonzaga, one of the benefits of being an employee here is there is a waiver when you're a full-time employee. to get your degrees paid for by the university. So I started up trying to get into the PhD program, however you need a master's in order to get into there and I don't have that. So that's what I did and much like yourself, I did that in 18 months. So I knocked on my master's in 18 months and we'll have it in May and then I'll finally get my terminal degree. That being said, the reason I'm getting my terminal degree is because I wanna be a dean. That's my goal. Alex the Dean. Like I'm just picturing this and what again, obviously I've qualified, I don't know you super, super well, but what I know of you and what I've heard of you and what the students think of you. Wow, that's a powerful like wow, okay. Well, all right guys, it's not often I'm speechless on the podcast. So like I said, Alex, you're turning it over to talk about all the things I'm gonna just remain speechless. No, seriously, that's fantastic. Okay. So that's going to challenge you. That is going to be, obviously, very, very challenging. I mean, let alone if you were single, let alone married with children, working, doing all the things. That opens up the door, of course, to what challenges have you faced, either personally and or professionally, and how you quote unquote overcome or work through those challenges. Like, what are the things that are going to power you through this upcoming challenge and any other challenges you have faced? So professionally speaking, you're always going to have challenges. That's just how this works. There's never going to be this easy life. I think it's really funny when my freshmen come in and they think that, oh, once I do X, it will get easier. And I actually had to pop one of my sophomore's bubbles recently and tell them, I just need to break the news to you now. It just actually never gets easier. It just like this. just. days constantly at this level of difficulty. The difficulty changes. It's a different arena. It's a different environment sometimes. It's a different hurdle. However, it's always going to be hard. It's always going to be difficult. There's always going to be hard things that you have to overcome. So for me personally, in my first position coming out of being a stay at home mom, I was trying to prove myself. I was trying to show everyone that I'm not just, you know, this woman that sat on the couch and let their kids run around the house. I wanted to show them that I was here and I was ready and I wanted to take it on and I wanted to conquer. But I had to start off from the ground level because I didn't get a professional degree. I got something where I had to actually prove that I could get through all these ranks. when I was doing that, unfortunately, I worked with quite a few people who didn't believe. that I was worthy or could get to those levels or should be sitting at the table. So when I was presented with that, was downward spiral for me, it was. It was really hard for me to overcome people questioning my intelligence or my integrity. I had, because I was a stay at home mom, know? Not only am I highlighted with the resume gap of being a stay at home mom, but I'm also a woman in a healthcare field that's not a nurse or a doctor or X or Y. So because of that, I'm always niched out of, know, well, but you're not this. So I'm always fighting against this barrier that I wanna overcome, which I will. It just takes time and it takes a lot of resilience and it takes a lot of effort to get through those hurdles. So I think when you're coming up on these hard points in your career or when you're coming up on these hard points of resistance, you just have to be optimistic and realize that this is but a moment. This too shall pass is something that I quote to myself often. My husband told me this when we first started dating that this was something he told himself. So I use that as a quote for myself. It's never going to last forever. This hard moment is going to pass. It doesn't mean there's not going to be another one that's equal to it or worse in the future, but professionally speaking, you got this. It's going to be fine. You'll make it past this moment. So professionally speaking, that's how I deal with any hard moment. I also am very open at communication. Not everybody is very open with communication, but I am OK with confrontation. If there's an awkward moment or an uncomfortable area that needs to be addressed, I always address it. I do it with my students. I do it with my colleagues. I do it with my leadership. And they've always been very receptive to those things, especially here at Gonzaga. I really appreciate that. That's what's kept me here as long as I've been here. And then personally, we all wish that our life would just hit pause while we're working or going to school or all these things. But unfortunately, that's not how this works. I have two kids. I have a huge family and things happen, so I use honesty. I know that there's like this rule, I just saw something on LinkedIn about how you're not supposed to share your personal life with your colleagues, because you're there to get the work done, that you shouldn't be talking to them about personal matters, because there should be a separation. I don't play that game. So basically how I've approached it last spring, my mother was diagnosed with cancer and had to go through a surgery. And I was in a immersion for my classes while I got this news. And the immersion was talking about, know, stories that frame who you are and how you deal with hard moments. And I'm like, wow, this is like the perfect moment for me to be in this class. So I came out of that class and I went into a meeting directly. And it was just such a long couple of days that I think I was. so overwhelmed with emotion at that moment in time that the moment I walked into this meeting room and I saw all of my colleagues talking to each other, I thought, I'm not ready for reality right now. This reality isn't what I need at this moment in time. I'm not ready to go back to being professional. So I removed myself and I walked out in the hallway to give myself a moment and one of my friends came out and knew what was going on, gave me a hug. I went back into the meeting. and sat there, went through all of the agenda items. We did everything while I'm just sitting there trying not to cry during the entire meeting. And they opened up the floor. Does anybody have any updates they wanna tell anybody? And I knew my mother was having surgery in like a week or two. So I stood up and said, I thought I should just let you all know that I might have to lean on you a little bit for advising this spring. My mother is going to have surgery. She's been diagnosed. We think we caught it early, but you know. I'm not sure what's going to happen. And in that moment of just being honest, I started crying in front of this room full of nurses. And because they're wonderful, beautiful human beings, my colleague Kim Cline stood up and gave me a huge hug. And I just respected that so much and I appreciated it. And so I know there's articles out there that says don't share your personal stuff and keep it all to yourself, but. If you're working with amazing people, just be honest, go through it. If you're having crap go on, let the crap go on. It's okay and be honest and open about it. It's a big deal when personal things happen and if you just keep it inside, it festers and that's not gonna be good for you either, especially as a nurse. You're gonna go through really, really hard things and if you don't address those things as they're happening, it's just going to... a bigger and bigger issue down the line when something even bigger happens. So be honest, be vulnerable, open yourself up. That's okay, it's not like you need to hide that you're in pain. We're all in pain, so don't hide it and be honest. I think those are my biggest things that I do professionally and personally when I'm struggling. and nursing students who are listening, that's a grown adult telling you that. You know what I mean? And I can vouch for that myself. You know what I mean? Same story. And there is, you know, always that discussion, depending on where you work, depending on your coworkers, your peers, your whatever, your work family, whatever term you want to use for that. There's always that discussion of, you know what mean, where do the lines get blurred? Where do you need to have those hard lines? You know, some organizations, some places are like, this is your work. This is not your you know, I keep thinking of The Office, the show The Office and you know, like why can't your family be your family and your work be your you know, I mean like can't you just you know what mean? Because for Michael Scott it was like no you are my family like you're all my kids and you know all the things anyway, and so, you know, of course there's a there is some merit to that discussion, but that being said 100 % it's you don't we don't work in a bubble. We don't live in a bubble. We're not you know, design versus evolution and all that. I'm not trying to get into that discussion, but you know, we genuinely, we humans, one way or the other, I don't believe, are designed to live onto an island on ourselves. You cannot do it all. We need each other, which is why this exists. You know what I mean? There are times, I'm doing this to encourage others. And there are times that I walk away from these sessions and I'm like, man, babe, I'll tell my wife, like, I'm like. that just, oh, you gotta, like, this episode, like this person, like, I just gotta get this out today, you know what mean? It's gotta be months down the road, but I gotta get it out today, because we're just all here. We're, that old saying, iron sharpens iron, right? In this case, it's more of a iron comforts iron? I don't know. Iron gives big hugs to iron? Something along those lines, but that's the thing, you know what I mean? And you can't live a life where, And that's huge, especially for us humans, but especially for you nursing students as well. Because I can't imagine you've seen this, Alex, but for sure there are nursing students, right, especially, I would have even imagined especially undergrads who maybe like you were coming in like, I got something to prove. I wanna, you know what I mean? I belong here. need to, this is the choice I made. And that's great, fantastic. Show them you belong. But it doesn't mean bottling everything up and not being vulnerable. Because that's the moment where we start getting concerned about one another. We get concerned about our students, we get concerned about our new hires. When they stop asking questions, when they start like retreating, that's usually a huge warning sign. One of the big things that I really focus on with my students is realism. So I try and just focus on what really is going on right now. I had an incoming student ask me, what is the biggest piece of advice you would give a student before they even enter college? And I said, this is a stepping stone. Just remember that. Academia is good at something that nobody really realizes until they're in academia, and it's selling itself. When you're in academia, everything is needed. You need to be in this club, you need to be in that club, you need a 4.0, you need to be a part of this honor society, you need this minor, that minor, you need to be an ROTC, you need to be a student athlete. All of these things need to be accomplished while you're also getting your BSN. Because that's just very easy to do. So. That is all that's just thrown at these students and it's just thrown at them and they just pull it all in like a sponge. And I have to sit them down and say, look, honestly, this isn't what you need to be doing. You're here to get a degree. You're here to make a career after this. You're not here to stay here forever because you've added on five minors. Realistically, you are here for a degree and realistically, a BSN. is a professional degree and you don't need a cherry on top. You don't need that whipped cream or sprinkles because what they're looking for is that you're not going to kill somebody when you leave this place. That you have the skills you need to make certain you don't kill people is what they're looking for. That one line on your resume that said, participated in X, Y, and Z, they're not really going to look for that. It's great and it rounds you out and it gives you experience, but it's not necessary. So realism is a really big thing that I try and focus on with my students. About a year and a half ago had a student come in that was brand new to me, upper division student, which I occasionally have juniors and seniors, came in straight A's, 4.0, going into their senior year. And they sat down with confidence and said, what, what. what advice do you have for me? What do you think? How's it looking? And of course I'm looking at it like, well, you have all A's, so I have no academic advice for you. But I looked at them and I said, actually, I do have one piece of advice. Go get a B. And they started, well, and they honestly, they did exactly what you're doing. They start laughing, know? They're like, yeah, okay, I'm gonna go get a B, sure. I'm gonna just ruin my 4.0 and get a B. And I said, no, honestly, you're a nurse. Yes! you're not going into a 4.0 world and you won't be able to deal with a non 4.0 situation. And I don't think that's good for your patients. I think you need to feel what it feels like to not be perfect before you leave this cushioned arena of a BSN. So go get a B is what I'm asking of you. And they looked at me like I was crazy and that left the meeting. came back the next time and guess what? They got a B. I was so proud. Oh, that's why I was laughing, because I'm like, this has come up before. And ironically, even just today, I had brought this up from a previous honored guest who was just an incredible instructor, incredible educator, now retired. She's just a lovely, lovely woman, taught at WSU and chaired there for a long time. And anyway, that B is for balance. That's what she always preached. And here you are, guys. You're hearing it. That was advice from Alex to a student. Go get a B. And not to derail it too much, but like what you're saying, it extends academia, this academia world, that extends to us adults and those that work in academia. Because then it's, you know, then you're building your CV, you're building your, you know, where have you been published? How many degrees do you hold? Where do you, you know what I mean? And all these things, so on and so forth. It's the adult version, or the adult version, I guess, of... You know what I mean? How many clubs have you been in? What have you done for the community? What are you doing? That sort of thing. And so, yes, that's great. And that 4.0 student, right? The 4.0 got them there. Great. Fantastic. Now check it at the door. Time to check it at the door. You know what I mean? And for those of you that are listening that are prospective nursing students, no, you don't necessarily need a 4.0 to get in the door. depends on the program. Programs are very competitive. I know that. I understand and I hear that stress on the daily. But. Point is, do what you need to do to get in the door. Once you're in the door, listen to Alex. Life's different. Life's different. Ugh! I love that realism discussion. So I imagine, though, that that also goes hand in hand with the need for resilience. What would you say about that? Resilience is a little different. So resilience is those students that are fighting to get into our program, which it is hard. I'm not going to say it's not hard. It is a very competitive program to get into, and that's across the board. Every program, the ones that you're going into after you've finished your prerequisites and ours, which is a direct entry. They're hard to get into. You have to really fight to get your position. However, once you're in, right, that realism is... High school's different than college. So you're gonna come in and more than likely you're gonna struggle a little bit. You're not going to have that cushion that you had at home. At home you had mom reminding you or dad reminding you to eat your food, to go and do your homework, to take a shower, don't eat Pop Tarts for dinner, ice cream is a bad idea before your test, you know, these kinds of things. Along with the, you know, partying all weekend and not studying for your chemistry exam is probably going to result in a failing grade. You don't have somebody telling you that. You're an adult now and you get to make those decisions on your own. So the realism piece that I try and bestow upon my students is sometimes it's not going to be perfect. And sometimes you got a chant that Cs get degrees, just slogan. right on your wall because a C is gonna get you through. Maybe it's not that perfection that you're looking for. Maybe it's not that grade that you wanted or the GPA that you know is your intelligence level, but realistically, it gets you through. So realism is just realizing that you're not going to be perfect as you go through here. That 4.0 student that I'm talking about is one of few. It is so very, very rare that I have a student with a 4.0 that graduates. Most of them have a 3.5, 3.6, you know, which is still a very high GPA. But they get Cs, they get Bs, they get B minuses, they fail tests, they get sick, they miss clinicals, they don't understand the skill right away. All of those and the realism of you also have a life outside of school. So. have that in your mind as well. So realistically, just look at, it's okay to fail a test. You'll overcome it, you'll move on. Resilience, you have to bounce back from those downward shifts, because they're going to happen every once in a while. So make sure that you're okay. Move on and go to the next step. Don't beat yourself up off of the fact that you failed your first anatomy exam. Anatomy and physiology is quite literally the hardest class that I could possibly think of. for a 19 year old to be taking. So my students that come in and are nearly in tears, I always tell the parents at preview day, I have a box of tissues in my office and a bowl of candy because every student that comes in needs one or the other and they are fighting for their life because they failed that anatomy exam. It happens, it's common, they're not alone. Well, anatomy was hard enough for this 26, 27 year old at the time. You know what mean? It's brutal. It's just brutal. And this is coming from a former point O student. No, you saying that, I've said it before. We'll say it again on this podcast, of course. No patient in your entire career. I'm sure someone will come back and be like, Eric, no, I had one that asked me. Anyway, but until that day happens, no patient is going to be like, hello, nurse John. Hello, nurse Susie. Hello, nurse whatever. What? GPA did you have when you graduated? No? Oh, all right. Can I get another nurse? Nobody's asking that. Nobody cares. And that I've said before, but the way you phrased it made me think of something else I've never said before, and that's this. I've always been a very huge proponent of ADNs. That's how I started. Got my associate's degree in nursing. Went back for the bachelor's. You don't have to go back for your bachelor's to become a good nurse. That's our opinion here. That's our stance. That being said. What opens doors? We've always said that advanced degrees open doors. You can do all sorts of different things the farther you go down that line. You know what doesn't open doors? Being a 4.0 BSN student. That does not open any more doors for you than having your BSN, whether it was obtained with a 75.0005%. or 105%, nobody does that. So I just love that you bring that up and that just keeps coming up. So listen to the wise words of Alex. But there's a problem with this Alex. So at first my initial gut reaction is to say, if we're focused on, you know what I mean, not the resilience, but coming in and learning how to become a student and mom and dad not telling me how to do things. Okay, well now I've got to focus it on my studies. Great. But I mean, now that means I need to cut out all the fun, right? Doesn't it? Or is that part of the balancing you're talking about? It's definitely a part of the balancing. While I have students that do partake in too much fun, I rarely... It's rare. does happen. It does happen. It's college. It's fine. It's college. I get it. I want my students to do... I want them to have fun. But most of my students think what you just said. They have to cut out all fun. They can't do anything else because they're so focused on classes and they're so focused on clinicals and everything. The students that I see that succeed and feel the most balanced are the ones that go and have some fun. Go have fun. Go do things with your friends and meet people outside of nursing. Don't just have nursing friends. Have non-nursing friends. They're going to be able to do more, honestly. So go and have those business major friends, those psychology major friends, they're fun. Those friends are the ones that you want and go and do fun things. I hear we have some kind of basketball team here, so maybe you can go to one of those. I think so, I don't know. Go check it out. Yeah. But yeah, go and see a game. Go to dinner. Go and explore downtown Spokane. You know, there's a lot of things that are near Spokane and far from Spokane. Go to the West side for the weekend. I don't know, but go and do fun things. You don't have a test every Monday, so if you can do something fun on the weekends and get to decompress that stress, that's going to be better for you because the students that have no fun, eventually it's going to break. eventually something's gonna give and usually that's this 4.0 standard that you're holding yourself to with having no fun. Nobody's holding you to that standard. That's not in our handbook. We've given our handbook to our students multiple times. We have never said 4.0 in there once. So having fun is key and that's why I have these community events that I hold for our students because I want them to have fun. I want them to go out there and experience life and see that we're fun too. because sometimes I get to have not fun conversations with students and they don't realize that I am a fun person. I like to do fun things. I'm not always just sitting here and harping you about your failing grades. That's not what I'm here for. on that subject of fun, you being a fun person, would you mind reading for us the, since this is not a video podcast, reading for us the- I lost my earring, we're good. Okay, we're good. All right, so I'll take it back from the top. How's it going? is it? Okay. So on the subject of you being a fun person, on that note, if you don't mind, would you mind reading, since this is not a video podcast, reading the pillow for us that's behind you? That would be fantastic. Just to get us a sense of, you know, the kind of fun that we're talking about. I almost want to hear that story. Only one. I have a pillow on this very comfortable chair in my office that says, does this pillow smell like chloroform to you? Brilliant. So see, she's not just there to have the difficult conversation. She's also there to knock you out. All right, so sometimes you just need a quick power nap. No, are not advocate. This is not we do not advocate the use of chloroform for sleep or for anything. Yep. No propofol. Do not. do the, oh, anyway. All right, so moving along, that might not even make the episode. Before we wrap up with the traditional questions, there were a couple of other things that actually don't necessarily tie into what we just finished talking about, but I don't wanna leave them out there to hang because you had them on your list of things you wanted to talk about. So, and one of which I think kind of leans into stuff you talked about earlier, and that is who inspires you, Miss Alex? I have the wonderful, beautiful experience of being a part of a huge family. So my mother and father both have higher education under their belts. My father has a PhD in toxicology and pharmacology, and he has been a pharmacy professor in neurobiology my entire life. So he's been working on that forever. And then my mother has a master's in family and adolescent counseling. She's been working in and out of higher education. She works for vocational rehab right now. So she works with sensitive populations and getting them employment. So I have them as my heroes. They're inspiring to me in every possible way. They support me in every step I take. Even if I want to have kids 19 months apart, they support me in everything that I do. But I also have this wonderful lineage of higher education from my father's side. Both of his sisters have higher education, both of his parents had higher education, which is a really big deal for African Americans in the mid 60s, 70s era to be gaining that kind of, not my father, he did not get his stuff in the 70s. But he'll say something about that, I'll be like, stop making me sound really old, he's not that old. But my grandparents getting education in that era is a really big deal. My mother's side, however, comes from my grandfather had a fifth grade education and my grandmother had an eighth grade education. They raised 10 children together and all 10 children have higher education. So it's amazing to have this lineage that has gone above and beyond what the previous generation has done. So whenever I'm thinking about what I want to be doing, where I want to be, when I say I want to be the Dean of Student Affairs, I don't say that just because I'm sitting here and that's been my goal since I was a little girl that I want to be the Dean of Student Affairs. I don't know what little girl is thinking that right now, but I say that because I want to be at the table. and I want to use the voice that's been given to me by my lineage. So I am half African-American and half Mexican-American, and those lineages have fought to have the education, have fought to have the knowledge bank, and have fought to be at the tables they're at currently. So I'm going to use that inspiration, and I'm going to use that heroism. I don't know. I'm trying to think of the right word. yeah. to get myself to a table where I can use that voice they gave me to make changes. Because I don't know if anybody knows this, right now we need to speak up. We need to be loud, we need to be proud, and we need to say the things that need to be said. So when I say who inspires me, it's my family, my wonderful, beautiful, loud, educated family. I want them to be proud to see me sit up there at that table. and use the words that they have used in front of me my entire life. So they're who inspires me. Mmm. I... So... I just... It gets me choked up. Like I just... This is why Alex is here. Amongst the long list of reasons why Alex is here. I just... Hats off to you, my friend. Hats off to you. Just incredible. I'm also realizing I might be tearing up because of that, and I also might be tearing up because I realized I asked these questions in the wrong order. We're gonna... The only other one you had that you wanted to talk about was your fictional character that you best aligned with. So let's go! Let's step out of the deep end of the pool. We're gonna get out of the pool, walk through the shallow end. Who are you most aligned with fictionally? you You It's all good. You know, I can go back and forth. I'm adaptable. So... Podcast flow 101. Don't do what I just did. But I want to hear it. I want the answer. Going back to what we were talking about with me watching CW's late 90s, early 2000s TV shows, I absolutely, and without, no embarrassment whatsoever, I know I'm putting that out there on a podcast for my students to hear, and this is one, gonna age me, and two, it's going to just make them question my sanity. I'm go back to both of the Vampire Slayer. I watch this show every year. So like every year since it is released for final season, because I was young and I couldn't watch the whole thing when I was super young, but I am barely an adult. A just turned capital A. I, Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I absolutely just love that the whole show is just highlighting this small, meek person. to be the strongest of them all, to take on as a leader and to take on and be the one that they all follow. And I actually just wrote a paper about this in my grad program too. So no, that's who I think of, honestly. I think of Buffy. I align with that. Not because she's, know, blonde and blue eyed and white, because I'm not any of those things, but. Because when you look at me, I don't think that it's always assumed that I have the voice I have and the stances that I have and the intelligence that I have. That's been squashed a lot of my life. That's been pushed back a lot of my life in professional arenas. So that is the one that I align with because I like being underestimated now, to be honest. It's more of an excitement when somebody's like, oh, honey, you don't understand what we're talking about. Oh. I get to sit there and I listen to them explain it to me and then I go into, well, actually the research says, and then they realize what they've done. So I enjoy that and I enjoy that alignment with the TV show that I watch over and over again. And for those students that are gonna watch it now and judge me, know that I'm aware that this show is very outdated, that the CGI is horrific. And no, they shouldn't sound like lions. They're vampires. I mean, there was something that, you know, went along with the CW shows. You know what mean? There was a certain production value. You know, it's not that it was, it might've even been slightly outdated for its time. You know, my frame of reference being Smallville and a couple others, of course. But no, I mean, but what you're saying is, for those of you students that do go and look at this and watch this, ignore, kind of like when you meet your patient, when you meet someone for the first time, ignore what's on the outside. You really focus dial in on what's on the inside, what is being shared, what is being said. Not the fluffy episodes, like the filler episodes that are just there to make that 24 episode quote or whatever, but the ones that carry the storyline. Watch that, watch that. Okay, so we'll just get right to it then, Alex. I wish we could just keep on going and going. What were the three words you chose to use just you know what I'm asking, and why did you pick them? I chose the three words to describe nursing school as rigorous self-exploration. So the reason I chose that is rigorous because it's hard as hell. Nursing school is not for the meek, it is not for the weak. It is a hard, hard thing to do. And every graduate that walks across that stage makes me cry because they have done amazing things and they are about to go to the link. do even more amazing things. So rigorous because of that, self-exploration because you're not going to be the same person you were when you entered nursing school when you end. You won't be. No matter where you go, no matter what nursing school you attend, you're going to be a completely different person at the end because of a patient experience, because of a student experience, a faculty or staff. Something is going to happen because we are honest and open with each other. We are humbled and supportive of each other. And much like what Eric is doing right now, we are shifting to this new approach of feeding our young and making sure that they learn from our past mistakes. Because man, have we made them. So we want our students to succeed. And that's that self-exploration that we know happens. So rigorous self-exploration. like you did with your family. We're trying to make it so they can step on our backs and start at a higher level than we started and learn from the mistakes we made. You guys, listen. Learn from the mistakes we made. Please, please don't make them again. It might stick better if you do, but don't. Let us take our years and just catapult from that. Catapult from that. You know, our few years. mean, you we're both in our, you know, yeah, yeah, yeah. Mid, late 20s, early 30s, somewhere in the... it's fine. love it 29 plus. This is the all 29 plus hour. So that being said, last question, not the next to last question. If you had one piece of advice, whether you've said it before or it's something totally different, if you had one thing that you want a nursing student or nurse out there to walk away from listening to your episode, what would that be? I don't know if I have said this, be kind to yourself. I think that's gonna be true to everyone. It's more true for nurses than anyone else, feel like. I worked at a medical school before this and I feel like they're taught very quickly to have this confidence and to make sure that they feel this, yeah, this inspiration in themselves. to do everything that they're doing. It's embedded in how they're spoken to by their preceptors and their clinical rotations. In nursing school, while we say it, we are also saying, just remember, you know, you're a piece of the puzzle. Make sure that you remember who you need to work with and collaborate with and that there's a doctor in the room and a pharmacist that you need to speak with and all these things. So it's more being taught to be a collaborator than have this inspiration and self-love. We say it, but that doesn't mean that that's how we're teaching it. So I think self-love is the biggest thing. You need to remember to care about yourself, put yourself first, take care of yourself first, and own your mistakes and be okay with it. That's that resilience piece. It's a really big deal when you're fighting yourself. It's a really big deal when you're putting yourself down, because... that's the loudest voice that's gonna be in your head. That's the loudest voice that's gonna be in your face is that one that's saying over and over again that you're not enough. That's not a good voice. Have that affirmation that you continuously say to yourself, even if you don't believe it, tell yourself you love yourself. Like fake it till you make it. Just believe in yourself and that self-love is the biggest thing. So I think any nursing student, any nurse out there, just remember to love yourself. Remember that you matter and that you're a big deal. And on the fly, one last question. Fellow nurse educator, Alex Giffin, because that's what you are, what advice would you have for your fellow nurse educators? I think the biggest piece of advice that I can have because I'm working on this and I probably will continue to work on this my entire career is to leave it with the student. So when they're in my office and they tell me what they tell me and they're going through the hard things that they're going through and they're struggling, be there with them. Be there with them in that moment. Give them the resources that they need. Listen and be present in the moment. But when they leave your office, If you need to send an email for that resource, send the email, but don't pull that in with you. Don't carry their burden for them. They're an adult. The nursing students are adults and they will deal with this on their own. You can help, but don't pull it inside of you because if you do that, I can't imagine how broken I would be right now if I pulled in all of their pain. There's so much pain that happens. Between 18 and 21 for everyone. but especially nursing students because you're going through these really hard things at 20, 21 and seeing people with their last breath, that's a big deal and be there with them, be present, but don't take it in. Don't take their burdens on as your own or you're not gonna be able to do this for very much longer. just like when you were a nurse with your patients. Same thing, right? Like you've gotta be able to somehow leave it at the door. As callous as that sounds, we never, we're not gonna dive into a deep discussion on this, but yeah, it's exactly what you're saying. Just, oh, we gotta be there for each other, but it doesn't mean we get to, in fact, no, I will add, I'll add two cents to this. It's not even my two cents. It's one of our incredible child life specialists at Providence Sacred Heart. She is absolutely amazing. Her name is Andie. If you're ever a Sacred Heart and you have a kid or you are a kid or whatever, you know, you need Andie in your life when you have to face some difficult things. But Andie, I love the way she phrased it. She said to me she had learned somewhere that when you... I want to see if I can do this justice. When you take on that other person's pain, you're doing them a disservice, not only yourself, but them. When you're taking on somebody's grief, You are, you know what mean? You need to allow them to work through that and to not do the disservice of adding pain to yourself, but also robbing them of that opportunity to work through that themselves. It's not exactly how she phrased it, but I think that's close enough to the heart of what she was saying. Alex, I just can't thank you enough. This has been absolutely amazing. I'm gonna book you. We're booked, I'm just telling you right now, for about a year from now, a couple years from now when you're knee deep in your doctorate. And we're gonna be talking about, I want advice on how to do that and how it's going so that at that time, because I already know me, I don't think I'm gonna have the time or money by then, but you know, it's still there, the carrot's still there, and my wife is like, well honey, I mean, you we could, like, I know, I know, I know, but let's get the kids out of the house and start focusing on things and it's coming. It's coming, but I don't know. yeah, Alex, we're good. pull you in Eric as like a full time faculty here and then you'll get the waiver that I'm getting so then you can be a faculty member teaching here. See, do see how I'm paving the path already? Do you see how this is going to happen? I grow up. So I think that's part of the thing. I need to get the lovely, love them with all of my heart, resource feeders, suckers, eaters, consumers, grown and out of the nest. So that then we have a little more leeway, I can take that bump and pay and then get that bump in a different area chasing after that PhD. boy, I'm in trouble. Don't let Chris hear this. Don't let Susan hear it. Don't let anybody, I'm gonna, nope, this isn't making the episode everybody, sorry, there'll be a very special Gunziga employee version of this that just, it'll be like 10 minutes, or it'll be like 40 minutes, it'll all be Alex. All right, Alex, thank you so much, have a great rest of your day, and I hope to see you sooner than later. Thank you for having me.