131 - Ani Posner Pt 1: It Doesn’t Feel Like Studying

Join nursing student and Portland, Oregon native Honored Guest Ani Posner as she discusses her special ability to fly by the seat of her pants, addressing the rumor she’s bummed that school is done for the summer, starting out wanting to do pediatric hospice, the influence of her nurse aunt, the many factors that helped her chose what university she went to, and more!

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Transcript

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Hello and welcome to this episode of the Feeding Our Young podcast. Day two in a row of having someone who was willing to just say, hey, I'll come in studio today. I got nothing going on. So I'm very excited to introduce to you guys someone who, man, just makes an impression on everyone they meet. And it doesn't matter how old they are, how young they are, but this particular Honored Guest, she's something special. So I'm gonna introduce to you guys one Grandma Ani Posner. Grandma Ani Posner, how are you doing today? I'm good, how are you? It could be something to do with the fact that I'm pulled up in a shawl with my glasses on right now to see the phone. I just love it. shows up and the screen comes up and I'm like, Ani's got her glasses on. I've seen you in your glasses right out at Holi. But then she's got this shawl and I'm like, dang, we're like one gray hair away from just making this the Grandma Ani show. I love it. I love it. love it. So Ani, I'm not going to waste more time. ah Let's just dive right into your story. And there's some things we're to talk about you guys that... might be a little sensitive slash triggering, nothing too horrible, but we'll warn you before that happens. So please don't steer away from the amazing person that is Ani. So Ani, let's just start with the basics. um What degrees do you have? You're a nurse now, right? Wait, but you're a grandma. I thought you were already a nurse. know a grandma of 21 years young. I will have a BSN at the end of next year, fingers crossed. um Fingers crossed, but right now, just at school, Just at school, just learning. No, that's amazing. There's no just about any of that, as you already know, of course. So where are you from? Where's home for you? I'm from Portland, Oregon. Awesome. And came specifically to Spokane to attend Gonzaga? Yes, I did. came, I applied to a bunch of schools and all nursing schools in Gonzaga just slowly rose through the ranks and eventually I was like, this is where I need to be. And so I packed everything up and came to Gonzaga and no family in Spokane, didn't know anyone in Spokane and decided to do nursing school there. Amazing. And I mean, we may get into this more as we unpack your story, currently any plan, are you planning on going back home then or have you fallen in love with Spokane or is it undecided? um It's undecided. I, ideally, in an ideal world, I would go back to Portland for a couple years and where I work right now. But I would go, I have the potential to be sent anywhere for a couple years after college. So I'm pretty much game for wherever I end And I don't really have a set plan. There's a certain special quality you have. What did you call it again? You're able to what? fly by the seat of my pants. Yeah! And that's exactly what we're doing here, ladies and gentlemen. uh our quick opening questions, what are the three words being in the midst of it that you are using to describe nursing school? um I said profound, humbling, and gratitude. those. And what are your three favorite songs in life right now? Okay, I made a list for these too. HAHAHAHA YES! I put Better Together by Jack Johnson. Where You Lead I Will Follow by Carole King. And You're Gonna Go Far by Noah Kahan. Man, it's so fascinating how often Noah Kahan comes up in this question. a little background for everybody. I started asking this somewhere around, um I think it's, somewhere midway. I want to say it was Honored Guest number 41 or 42. So I had this little idea in the back of my brain to make, I just call it the Feeding Our Young Side Project, and it just released today. And I'm so excited. So, Ani, as soon as we're done, guess what? Those three songs are gonna be added to the now burgeoning and created Feeding Our Young playlist. And so, Spotify playlist. And that playlist right now, I didn't, I was like, oh, there's gonna be a lot of songs on there. Well, we'll talk about the Honored Guest number situation here in a second, because I wanna make a big deal out of that. But out of all the Honored Guests we have, I ask everybody their top three. Most everybody provided three. Every once in while I get someone who's like, ah, I like books. I like this. But almost everybody gave three. 14 hours worth of music, Ani. 14 hours. And no duplicates in there either, because even though many said duplicates, I made sure to just have, you know, if it was represented, we're not doubling it up. So I just love it. I'm like, I cannot wait to go on my next run, because then I can listen to music that I'm not normally exposing myself to. So blah, blah, blah. It's so much fun. I just tell you, I'm like, and You are now part of this beautiful fabric, this mosaic, or at least, I don't know, is it a quilt? Grandma Ani? Are we making a Feeding Our Young quilt of all these Honored Guests and episodes? I feel like that's what we're doing. I love it. All right, so then, you have been prepared. You are ready to take, now that you're in the middle of a little bit of a break here, a breather out of school, and I'm gonna... just administer a quiz straight away. So we are doing the patent not pending unofficial Feeding Our Young personality quiz. Are you ready, Ani? All right. Would you rather never have to wait in line again or always have a parking spot? Never have to wait in line again. Boom. Would you rather lose the ability to lie or believe everything you're told? Oh no... I try not to go with the impossible like you know what I mean where they're like too bad like choices lose the ability to lie. Okay, okay. Would you rather never be able to go out again during the day or never again during the night? the day. Isle seat or window seat? on a plane. Windows all the way. All the way, okay. I'm like, it could be in a car, a really wide car. uh in being given situation on any motor transport window seat. Bingo. All right. knew I liked you for a reason. All right. Would you, and the last question, would you rather, now assuming the given, one wish, you don't get to wish for more wishes, right? Would you rather have one wish granted today or 10 wishes granted 20 years from now? Ooh, I think 10 wishes granted 20 years from now. stocking it up. Well, the results are in, Ani. You are outstanding. Congratulations. Congratulations. All right. Now that you know what you are, and we all know all about you, having answered those questions, let's just dive right into the fun. So we talked about home. We talked about home being in Portland. Let's do a couple more of the pleasantries, just that background information on you. But family, just the subject of family. What do you want to share? Who is your family? Okay, well, my family back in Portland, my immediate family is my mom, shout out Lisa, my dad, Jason, and then my younger sister, Kira. um Those are my people. I have both my grandparents, my grandma, Betsy, and then my grandma, Joe, and my grandpa Ed, they all actually live um a mile from, less than a mile from my house. So I've grown up around all my grandparents. um who is also a wonderful nurse, um lives maybe two miles from my house. And I have the absolute pleasure of working with her over the summers, so that's super fun. um But those are my immediate people, my immediate family. We have all the fur babies, all the dogs and cats, but... Yeah, I have a bunch of friends that I consider my family, because I feel like with me once... Once you're one of my people, you reach family status. You're not. But we have a ton of extended family friends that are like older brothers to me or cousins or so. Yeah. And they all know who they are and I love all of them. So that's kind of my family. Oh, I love that answer. On that note, you know, nobody stop listening to Ani based on what's about to be said, please. But rumor has it you may be actually kind of bummed that school is done for the summer. You don't have to confirm or deny that vicious, vicious rumor. But even if it were true, ah What are those things that you're gonna try and fill your schedule with now or that you get to do besides working, of course? What do you like to do? So Portland summers are really fun, they're super warm and we get so much rain. So I'm really excited for the sunshine. I spend a lot of time at the river, even though it's kind of gross here. The river is not most ideal location to swim, so I go off to a bunch of lakes. uh I try to take the dogs with me when I can. uh Hopefully gonna get back into running this summer. It is a hopeful goal. I don't know how successful that goal will be yet. I'm out loud so other people hear it. So then I have to do it is the thought process. Then I'm not gonna tell you that your episode won't air until October after the summer's complete. But we'll check in in October and see if. be like, so ony, were you able to do what you said you were gonna do? oh that's a big goal for this summer. And I don't know, I go to the gym a lot. I what else do I do over the summer? I okay, I love finding new coffee shops. And so I, I don't know, because I grew up in Portland, I've spent a lot of time in like the same area. And I love my area, I love my people in my area, but I want to maybe branch out. started doing this in Spokane where every exam I had, I would go find a new coffee shop to study for that exam. And so that was kind of, that's that's a fun activity I picked up. So maybe I'll try to do that this summer and find some new places in Portland and spend some time with friends that I get to see that live all across Oregon. So I get to road trip, which Oregon is beautiful in the summer. So I'm excited to kind of road trip across it and see everyone again. Awesome. I definitely second all of that because uh I'm a Washington boy born and bred, but man, there's just something about this Northwest. know what I mean? Oregon is beautiful. Washington, beautiful. We're all getting more wildfires nowadays, but besides that, man, there's no better place to live. Sorry to everyone else in the country. Love you. But this is where it's at. guys. Oh, sorry everyone. So by the end of this, Ani will have like three people listening, because people will have been tuned out like, okay, that was stupid. she loves school? Okay, no, forget that. we're just throwing everybody under the bus. dear. All right, so then I've got to know, uh like what, why nursing? Like what brought you, tell the story of what brings Ani into the nursing field. My answers have, I feel like in nursing school, that's the question that you're asked most often is why did you, why are you here? uh What are you doing here? What are you doing? uh And my answers have changed so much. Honestly, sometimes day to day in nursing school. um What originally brought me to nursing was I always found medicine fascinating when I was little. My parents gave me this like stuffed animal vibe stethoscope doctor kit, like a stuffed syringe and a stuffed stethoscope. Oh were carrying those around with me and I wanted to play doctor and nurse in hospital and like I wanted to do that all the time. um I think I annoyed people into doing it most of the time. And I think my family always knew that I was going to do something in medicine. um I always loved the science the way the human body works is just what makes my brain like it clicks in my brain. um And So finding something for me that clicks so well, where when I study it doesn't even feel like I'm studying because I'm excited to learn it is a really big blessing. And honestly, probably why I'm still in nursing school, because there are things that push you sometimes. um But I originally, thought for a long time that I wanted to do research. um And I was an intern in Portland when I was 16-ish. um Children's Cancer Research Facility. uh And I loved research. I thought it was super interesting. I thought what everyone did there was super admirable. And I'm really grateful that we have people whose brains work in research. My brain is those brains is what we learn. And not because I couldn't do it, but because I wanted to be around people and I wanted to be talking to them and I wanted to be doing hands on things with people rather than pipetting or under a microscope or stuff like that. And I wanted to, I felt like in research for me, there was too much red tape to cross in order to get to where I wanted to be. um I needed to be able to see results quicker than what research was able to provide. And so I remember I was on the phone one time talking to one of the clients, we'll say that this nonprofit helped. um And I ended up, it was a father of um a child who had undergone chemo and cancer. um And this child had such severe PTSD that they were not able to talk to me about it. And I ended up talking to this dad for, I think, five hours on the phone out of my work day and his work day. um And he cried with me, laughed with me, and I... remember looking over and seeing the person working at the desk next to me crying too. And they could only hear end of the conversation. They were like, you need to go be a nurse. Like you need to go do this because you don't, much love, but you don't belong here. um Like hearing your end of the conversation, you need to go do that. And I was like, I never really thought about being a nurse. Okay. So then I applied to nursing schools. uh boom, that's it. That was kind of like just the, oh yeah, I mean, I want to do something in medicine. I have always been told that I'm a people person most of the time. um And I like doing hands-on things. I like flying by the seat of my pants and problem solving, and I like the chaos. so um nursing so far has been a pretty good fit, but that's kind of how I got the nudge to maybe think about it. I think unfortunately a lot of the time people are like, I want to grow up to be a doctor. And then, and that's like the go-to and like the second that it clicked for me, was like, yeah, I want to grow up to be a nurse. Like I, I, this is for me. so no shade on doctors at all. But yeah, there are different types of people for every career and it just clicked for me. Um, but yeah, that's kind of how I got there. Um, and I started out wanting to do. pediatric hospice nursing through that experience. I kind of, I was fascinated with the idea of being able to help someone die well and die with dignity. um Because we all end up there. So I was really fascinated by that idea. And with kiddos, we never expect for them to be the first out. And so um I was kind of drawn to that. um I don't know if that's where I'll ever end up or if that's still what I'm drawn to, but that kind of that fascination with that and being in that world that then taught me to or nudged me towards nursing and those two mixed together kind of were what pushed me into nursing school. Man, beautiful, just beautifully stated. Because I have about three or four different thoughts that are all trying to come out of this funnel I call my mouth at the same time. uh One of which is, I mean like that pediatric hospice piece for example. Everybody already knows I've been a pedsonc nurse, that's how I started my career, that was my passion. um There's a, you you can get, for those that are not aware, you can get certifications in your specialties. Every specialty, almost every specialty I think that exists, including educators, have certifications you can test for and uh sometimes there's financial incentive, but for the most part, it's just making sure that like you are keeping your knowledge up to date and then you have to keep it up to date every three, four years so that you're always at the forefront of what's being done. so, but so the big one for PEDS oncology is the CPHON, C-P-H-O-N, Certified Pediatric Hematology Oncology Nurse, I believe it is. And so in order to prep for that, I went ahead and got, you know, the love of learning, it just, you know, don't ever let it go. I got my CPN, Certified Pediatric Nurse, and then before I was still terrified of the CPHON, and I was like, why don't I go for this other one? And there's a CHPPN. Certified Hospice and Palliative Pediatric Nurse or something along those lines. And um man, I'll tell you what, because I was like, that was always going to be my fallback. If Pete's oncology didn't work out or I got burnout, fast forward to today, yes I did. But that was going to be my fallback. But I just don't feel like there was enough pediatric hospice programs. Yes, you can help kids in those situations, inpatient and in the, but anyway, all that to say. having sat for that exam, man, Ani, you'd be perfect. You'd be perfect. Obviously, you said, you know, you're keeping the doors open and all the things. um Everything you said about why you became a nurse also brings two other questions into mind that relate to that. First of all, did obviously this person sitting next to you is what kind of prompted you to go that way. Your aunt that you referenced that is a nurse, an amazing nurse, did that ever provide an example for you or was that was she any influence at all? So, yes, she her name is Lori. She is. Back to you. Oh my gosh, she is a phenomenal nurse. She. She yes, long story short, she she did influence me a bunch. I have always been very strong headed, so my family. Nursing was kind of my thing. Like I was, mom, dad, I'm gonna go for this and go do this and sound good, sound good. Okay, let's go. um And kind of just like everyone helped me make it happen. But it was definitely my, thing that I latched on to. um My aunt helped me get the job that I have right now. um She, I guess, um introduced me to to where I work. And I'm a nursing assistant right now, super fun. I work in a PACU. um And so I help prep a lot of different people for surgery. um And I get to be the face that you see when you come on in before anesthesia takes you away and before the nurses do their thing. watching her in her actual, in her element, I didn't know much about what she did or the population that she worked with until I started working with the same population of people. But watching her has more molded me into understanding what type of nurse I want to be. um I've never seen a nurse, and I think her colleagues would also agree that, like, I've never met someone with more patience. I thought of myself as someone with patience until I saw her work. She is always... super bubbly, even if it's eight o'clock in the morning and I've already been there for two hours because she is the princess shift right now. oh But she's always super bubbly. She's willing. She is such a team player and is so genuinely kind with her patients and so there are people that are nice. There are people that are kind. And my aunt is nice to her patients and deeply kind. She is like both. Um, and so like, there are some moments that I've had where I have just been so frustrated and she has just brought it back down and been like, okay, well, gain some perspective. You're here to take care of your patients and like taught me kind of how to work through frustrating situations with patients and empathy. Um, and so I don't know if she necessarily like ushered me towards nursing, but once I Once I had solidified that that's what I wanted to do, she kind of showed me how to grow up into the role a little bit. coming kind of that example that you could look at and go, that's who I want to be when I grow up. Yeah, yeah, that speaks volumes that you have chosen someone who's so mature. so, you know what I mean? Whereas I, my hero, the one I want to be that I'm still working on becoming like is my third grade teacher. Mr. Hasz apparently that was it. Like there's nothing better than that. But no, this man, it sounds very, you know what I mean? Like this guy. He taught for three, three and a half, four decades. I don't remember exactly how many. We're talking hundreds and hundreds of kids that he, and I mean, obviously he made an impact because here I am in my forties still talking about him today. And that man was just patient with kids uh went above and beyond in how he taught children. He, Onni, he built this entire like, old school, I want to say Civil War era, right? Like maybe, type town, fake town, facade, storefronts, all the things built by him, by hand. He had a log cabin on his property, built the whole thing with the help of the community, parents of his students. And then I was in, you know, I'm outgoing, like the public school system as he's making that happen. So I was able to come back and kind of help build, but I never got to experience what he called it Seagullville. There's a whole story behind that. bore everybody with it. But Seagullville was the name of the town. And you can actually probably Google it and still see pictures to this day. It's since, unfortunately, think, burned down, things of that nature. But he would have his students come third grade. And they would have, they'd all have different roles in the town. They'd be the postmaster. They'd be the, just again, going above and beyond. This episode, of course, is about Onnie, not sponsored by one Mr. Jim has. But that's, I love those people in our lives that you just go, oh my gosh. My aunt, like just I hear you say, it's not the words you're saying, it's the passion you're saying them with. So I love it. uh Okay, so then the, and I'm quickly realizing my error in uh asking the wrong question first, because this one feels a lot less. uh impactful. But the other thought that came to my mind while you were talking about being a nurse and you said, you know, you did land on Gonzaga. You came from Portland, but you said it kind of slowly worked its way up the list. For those people who are listening who are maybe prospective students or not locked into any particular place yet, what were the factors that went into you deciding to go to Gonzaga, you know, when compared to say a community college or other universities or staying closer to home, etc., etc.? Okay, I'm not sure if I'm the most ideal candidate to ask this question to, but I'm gonna provide honesty and everyone listening, even if it's no one, can make an educated decision based off of that. So I remember being a senior in high school and I knew exactly what I wanted to do, but I had no idea where I wanted to do it. And I like I'm the older sibling. My sister and I have really different the way that we approached college was really different. I wish sometimes I had used her approach, but hindsight is 2020. I applied to 14 schools, which is a lot. I don't recommend. I mean just the thought of the amount of work that went behind that right? Like that's a lot of work. I wrote a lot of applications and I think by the end, I think I wrote one application, maybe it was to Gonzaga, I don't even remember about, they asked me a favorite movie and I think I wrote about Horton Hears a Who. And I couldn't actually tell you why. I just think that at that point my brain was scrambling at anything it could grasp 14 applications later. uh I'm going back to my younger childhood here, let's just, I don't care, let's do this. of the universities have taken everything that I have. uh But I applied to 14 schools and if you're applying into nursing schools, you're going to learn that there's something called a direct entry, bachelor's of science in nursing program. um Gonzaga has one, Seattle University has one, Linfield University has one, I think. um University of Portland, University of San Francisco, a lot of different schools. lot of Jesuit schools have them. And I narrowed it down. I think I got to between USF, Seattle U. um I didn't apply to Portland's University of Portland because I wanted to branch out from home. um And Gonzaga. And for me, um they are very similar programs in terms of how they're run. They're all, I think all of them are Jesuit universities. um I wanted to be, so then I started looking at living costs, San Francisco versus Spokane versus Seattle. uh I started thinking about where I might want to live when I'm older one day and how I might not, I may or may not, depending on how college goes, want to live in the same city that I went to college in. And I knew that I would maybe want to try out living in Seattle, because I have family friends there that I knew that I might want to live in San Francisco, because my grandma grew up there and I've always loved visiting there. But I didn't know anything about Spokane. I knew that Spokane of the three was the one that had the most distinct four seasons. ah And I knew that it was a five and a half hour ride home. So it was just far away enough from my parents where they'd have to work to get to me, but not far away enough where they Um, so I, and I, I told my mom the other day that I was like, mom, you did your doc, you did your job, right? Like congratulations, you made it as a parent because I don't need to come home, but I want to come home and I run home every single chance that I get. And so Spokane kind of lets me do that. I wasn't planning for that, but if you're a high school senior or someone graduating from community college or literally anyone at any age and you want to be close to your family. and you don't need to come home, but you want to come home, five and a half hours is a perfect distance. Because it's not a necessity and you can take care of yourself and you can be independent and learn to become you, but you, they're right there if you need them um or if you want them. And so that was a huge factor for me. I didn't realize it back then, but that's honestly the biggest advice I would give someone now is... um I don't know, I think that direct entry is a way that I chose to go. uh Looking back two years ago, I think what would have been best for me might have been taking a year off from high school to college, maybe doing a community college route and then going into nursing school uh with some work under my belt as a nursing assistant with some traveling under my belt with a little bit more perspective on the world under my belt. Um, but I'm here and I'm really grateful that I ended up at Gonzaga because, and shout out to Gonzaga, I don't think there's a single nursing program in the country that does nursing school the way Gonzaga does nursing school. I have a lot of friends across the country at a bunch of different nursing schools and there is no one that is doing the curriculum in such a holistic way. There is no one that, like the professors at our school. know every single nursing student by name, know where they're from, know who they are, know if that student wants a hug in a specific situation or if they don't. If that student, um what type of family they come from, how that student learns best. I've never met professors uh or clinical instructors that are more caring and more compassionate. And I feel like I have family at school now within my professors and within my faculty. And I think that's so rare. So if you're thinking about Gonzaga, that's my two cents about the nursing school itself. um Thank you for that and Gonzaga if you'd like to send money either Ani's way or my way for promoting your Institution by only wait they already throw money my way because I work there so yeah, just send money Ani's way On his throwing money towards Gonzaga, which is then throwing some of it towards me, so thank you, Ani Thank you for helping me feed my family and everything else. that didn't get awkward real quick uh Excellent connection literally that's amazing. um Okay, well that went way off the rails because I was going to just say the first thing I wanted to say after you finished talking was that I for one, and I know that many, many other people, whether they're faculty or students, are grateful that you didn't end up taking that other more traveled road, you know what I mean? Because now we all have the pleasure of knowing you. So thank you for maybe not doing it the way you thought you should have. um And second of all, If there's anyone listening, my little radar goes up and everyone's like, man, people probably listen and go, okay, yeah, he works at Gonzaga. There's a lot of Gonzaga people on the podcast or conversely like OB, right? he's working with this OB nurse and this OB nurse. Everybody always talks about OB or Gonzaga. Hey, if you don't like it and you're listening to this, give me a call. Hit me up. our contact information right at end of this episode. I will have you on the podcast. It is not about Gonzaga. It's not about OB. It is about making nursing better. So if that's you, I can't wait to hear from you. ah But in the meantime, that's a little, little sidestep. I'm looking at the time and I see that we are nearing that magical 35 minute mark. And I know that you've got quite a bit to say. Already you're, you're already dropping some wisdom, but man, you guys, you don't want to miss what she has to say. So Ani. Are you a grandma, Ani? Are we past your bedtime yet or can we make it and turn this into a double episode? I don't know where, yeah, we can make it a double episode. my gosh, Awni, I almost forgot to mention before we close this episode and get into your second episode, very, very important fact. We talked about these numbers and ah I just have to say I am honored to sit with you today and how serendipitous this all worked out because you are Honored Guest number 90. Nine zero. That is an incredible milestone. This is not tooting my horn, you people. People have heard like, you no, this is our 100th episode and da da. You have to celebrate the milestones. But the fact that you are the 90th incredibly empowering, uplifting, inspiring human being that I've been able to sit with, that's a milestone worth celebrating. Yay! I wish there was like some sweet 90th Honor Guest swag I could send your way, but no. I feel honored. I feel like an honored guest, but honored in spirit. An honored, honored guest. I'm an honored Honored Guest. I truly am. uh I said that's amazing that there's been that many and like you get to continue doing that because it's so important. Yeah, I can't wrap my brain around it. And on top of that, it is also serendipitous in another manner that just came into my brain. Your grandma, Ani. Grandma Ani. Not 90 years old, but then 90, I thought I guess. today, so. Couldn't be better. a day over 80, sister, all right? You're great. uh Touche. All right, well, with that, we'll catch you guys on the flip side.