181 - Margie Cooke Pt 1: A Nurse Well Traveled

Join long-tenured nurse and Los Angeles, California and St. Maries, Idaho native Honored Guest Margie Cooke as she discusses her special superpower, her traveling adventures (including 50 countries and soon to be 7th continent), her incredible family, comparing and contrasting living in a large city versus a very small town, why she chose nursing as a career, her journey through five nursing programs in eight colleges, and more!

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Transcript

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Hello and welcome to this episode of the Feeding Our Young® Podcast. I might be a little too early to declare this, but today I am declaring victory. Victory over what, you might say? It's not really victory over what, but I am hoping that at the time that these words are being heard by you and by other people, and by one person in particular named Bethany Siemers, uh then we will have hopefully pulled the wool over this wonderful woman's eyes. Who is Bethany? I'm glad you asked. A former honored guest named Maia Siemers. You can go back and see her episode. She is the daughter of one Bethany, both of which. Bethany is a nurse that I've worked with for many, many, many years in the P like back in the peds world, now over in labor and delivery, Mom Baby. And so we've known each other for quite some time, and she is one of our most ardent supporters. Thank you, Bethany, for that. That being said, today's honored guest. Reached out to me and said, Eric, I want to be on your podcast, and there's only one condition. Do not tell Bethany. I have the honor of speaking with what is uh you know, will be the third generation of nurses, uh to you know what mean? Um the one the only Margie Cooke. Margie, how are you this fine morning? I'm fine, thank you. And I say we'll be third generation nurse because Maia is currently in nursing school. Um and Bethany very early on was like, No, I I I can't I'm I'm not gonna be on the podcast, no thank you, but I will definitely support you. I will listen to people and all the things and so I hope that right now she is just like cannot believe that you and I pulled the wool over her eyes, right, Margie? We we've done well, we've done well so far, neither of us have flubbed it up, but You're her sadly, Margie's episode, we're recording right now, Monday, June 1st. Her episode will release one month from today, July 1st. So we still have 30 days to keep the secret, and I think we can do it, right? I think of the two of us, I'm the one more likely to screw it up. So um I will just keep a nice little button on my lips, and Bethany, hopefully if you're hearing this now. You will know that we have succeeded and we are awfully proud of ourselves. So without further ado, enough about Bethany, enough about Maia. This episode is about the one, the only the legendary Margie. Margie, go ahead and introduce yourself to us. let's start with nursing school. So I it's pretty well established you're a nurse. Go ahead and tell us what nursing schools have you attended and where did you get your degrees from? Okay, hi Eric. It took me eight colleges to finally say I have my master's in nursing, but it started off when I was 17, I went to, I became a CNA in high school. And that was at West Valley Occupational Center. And then from there I went to UCLA and then I married quite young at 19 and we in turn went to the Northwest. So in the Northwest, we lived in some very remote areas. And at 20, I became an LPN at Yakima Valley College. We moved again to Wenatchee and I became an ADN at Wenatchee Valley College. And then we continued our move to some remote areas with my husband's work with the Department of Agriculture. And then eventually I got my bachelor's degree in 1984. and then I got my master's in 1991 in leadership and advanced care from Whitworth College. So that was my course of education right there. Oh my goodness. And I know this question will have some overlap to it because you've already insinuated that you came from somewhere, moved somewhere else, etcetera, etcetera. But where are you from? So you can answer this however you wish. Where's home for you? Okay, I was born and raised in Los Angeles, California, and then I moved, I met my husband and I moved at 19 to the Northwest. So I currently call my home for 46 years, St. Maries, Idaho. And that's where I have lived and I've commuted all over the place to attain schooling and work, which is 70 miles each way to Sacred Heart. Yeah, I I was gonna say I can't even I'm gonna throw my two cents worth in here because when we first moved to Spokane, uh, my first job while I was going to SCC doing prereqs, trying to knock those out of the way while working full-time, uh, with our first son. We had our first son at the time. I obtained a job that was based out of Hayden, Idaho. And I'm gonna shout it out because the company doesn't exist anymore, but Powder Basin Associates. They were a mental health and psychiatric slash t chemical dependency clinic and outpatient based And I was their medical records department. They literally hired me to start their medical records department at a robust $9 an hour. And uh everybody's like, was this back in the 80s? No, no, no. This was uh this was 2000 and let's see, when did we move over here? 2002. And they took a chance on me, and I absolutely was so grateful for that. But as part of it, I got to travel to their satellite clinics. They had satellite clinics in Kellogg and Sandpoint and this little logging town called St. Maries, Idaho. So I have traveled up to I've made that drive many, many times. I'd go up there every week or every other week during the winter when the roads were bad. You get stuck behind the logging trucks and everything. So the fact that you're from St. Maries just tickles me to no end. Well, wonderful. So before we get to know more about you, what are the three words you would use to describe nursing school? Having been too many. Well, I love school, so I will say the first one is interesting, second, fascinating, and the third is thought-provoking. Fantastic. And the sister question to that, what are three of your favorite songs in life right now? Well, it's a pretty tough question because I love a huge genre of music. But I will say, and they have different meanings for me, but one is I Love How You Love Me by Bobby Vinton, which is actually even before my time, Bad Habits by Ed Sheeran. And I like this song Edelweiss by uh In the Sound of Music. So it's kind of a variety. And that's where I really have a variety of interests with music. Oh, I love it. And Edelweiss is such a beautiful song. I love that you bring that one up. That's so fantastic. Uh so Margie, uh, before we start talking your career and all the things, you know, we have these nice like icebreaker fluff questions. I like to start with, get you comfortable, get me comfortable. What am I talking about? You're already comfortable. But it also helps us get to know you a little better. So let's start with some fun icebreakers. And I really loved your answer to this one. Margie, what is your superpower? Well, I would say my superpower is the fact that I really love nursing. And I love to be that impetus, that spark that through my knowledge and sheer love helps patients and staff feel better, do better. When staff are not kind to one another, which really bothers me and has my whole career, my message, and I say this to all of them, especially the ones whose feelings have been hurt, they didn't get that promotion. I say be that person who is more than, who builds up the group, who works solely or as a team to be more to each patient, to be more to each fellow nurse, and to be more to the group of healthcare providers. So. And and and uh any reason, you know, i if there's any reason anybody needed for why she's on this podcast, there you are. That's the exact thing we're trying to combat here. So I absolutely love that. Another fascinating uh I love this peek into who you are. If you could have a meal with one person, dead or alive, who would that be? without a doubt it would be Jesus. I find him absolutely amazing. I would love to be around him, listen to him, because he's had such an impetus in the world. And it's like, who is this man whom I know from scripture, but to really see him, it would be so interesting on earth. And another fascinating answer to this question. What is your greatest regret, Margie? Okay, now regrets is a strong word and I try to make choices so I am not regretting the consequences. And luckily, I kind of learned that early on. Don't screw up because you're to have consequences to it. But you know, I always wish if I was going to say regret, I wish I was kinder and more loving, like consistently. oh There's no single moment that I would want to relive. I can't think of any. And if I make a choice that I don't think is good, I try to rectify it as soon as I can, whether it be in the personal world, working world, because we make choices constantly. And I think, oh, man, I got to change that direction. Things are going. And, you know, I worked as a supervisor for about 35 years and you are in the middle of a variety of decisions. So I try to make a thoughtful decision to make the consequences better. But I don't live in a state of regret ever about anything, thank goodness. Okay. love it. Well let's get to know you a little bit better. When you're not talking all things nursing, when you're not doing and we're gonna I'm so excited to dive into your career. Um you've been a nurse for how long now? It has been 49 years. Yes. away from being a fifty year nurse. I just I'm I'm one year away from being fifty years old. So I'm you know, for whatever works, I like it. This is great. I wish I could say 50 but it's 49. uh You're almost there. You're almost there, sister. So uh getting to know you just a little bit more, uh yeah, when you're not doing all things nursing, talking all things nursing, and and we're not saying she is a retired nurse. No, no, no, she's still active. So when you're not doing the nursing things, what are your hobbies? What are your interests? What takes up your free time? Okay, well, for our entire married life, um and when I was a child, we traveled a little bit, like a two week vacation, but not extensively to the beach, because we lived in Southern California. But from the moment I met my husband, we have always traveled. So traveling is a big thing. And next February will be our seventh continent and last that we've gone to. And consequently, I really love international nursing. um I enjoy different cultures and I like to see what I can do in other worlds besides the world of the United States. And we have been to about 50 countries so far. Well I like I can't even wrap my mind around. Now, the other thing I do love to do, which I've kind of rekindled, when I was in nursing school, I had to take an elective. So I live kind of at a pivotal point where I'm commuting forever. And I commuted to Moscow for an upper division elective, and that was weaving. So I took a whole year beginning and advanced. The instructor was the head of the weaving guild and extremely knowledgeable. So I just was in hog heaven. and loved it and really embraced it. But when I got done, I thought, I don't have time for this because I have four children. There is a commute factor there. Still, I was going to college. And so I kind of put it in the back of my mind. And then I have been playing mahjong, which I love. That's kind of a new hobby. And at it, a friend of mine who's a weaver was sitting next to me. We started to shoot the bull about waving and then lo and behold, she had her. she had a loom for sale. So I got the loom and she got me back into it. We spent a couple weeks together and I feel so excited about that hobby. So that's my latest hobby. Incredible. I just I I i i it parallels my love of cross stitching because I, you know, as a child I learned how to cross stitch from my mom, and then I didn't touch it for years until our first son died, and I decided I wanted to do this portrait of him for my wife. And that kicked off the love again, and you know what I mean? I've been doing it since. And so my goodness. And I have to ask, I I would be remiss if I didn't. Seven continents. Where does Antarctica fit in that, or is that the last one? And why did you go to Antarctica? Well, okay. Well, that will be the last and that is next year. So it'll be in 2027. We want to have it as part of our bucket list, but we will go to South America and go to Chile, Argentina, and then take a cruise around Antarctica, see the penguins, see the different marine life. And so the fact that we haven't been there is one of those things we want to do. ah I don't know how much time on the continent you get. You do get all you walk on it and you do, they have you geared up for the cold weather. They provide the gear on the boat. So I'm just super excited about it. It's still, you know, an adventure to behold, but I do like animal life. So I'll be, we'll be seeing penguins and dolphins and whales and all of that, which is right up my alley. enjoy all that. So that's why that's the seventh, all the other ones we have gone to. I I j I'm just I'm I'm dumbstruck. Uh which it takes quite a bit to make happen when I've you to render me speechless, as everyone knows, is a little bit of a difficult chore. Congratulations. But no, for me, like that's hearing that, and this is why I like let me back up just a little behind the scenes on the podcast situation here, everybody. And that is, you know what I mean? Like, there's some episodes where I feel it. I feel like, my gosh, you know, we're talking just about the person, what you love, your life experience, etc. And I can feel in the back of my mind those that would go, okay, let's get to the good stuff. Let's get to the nursing. Let's get to the But this is the good stuff also. And this is why I do this, because part of the joy in learning, you know what I mean, your passion in nursing and all that is these things that inform your passion about nursing and what makes Margie Margie, what makes her tick, and other people that have come before her and the people that'll come after her. So for those who are like maybe skipping through uh the first half of episodes because they want to get to the nursing part, I won't blame ya. Sounds great. But I'd recommend you don't because we get to find these little fun anecdotes. Like I've not talked to anybody who's been to Antarctica yet, and yet the only tie I have to that, my uncle met his wife in Antarctica. He's from Spokane, she's from Arizona or Colorado, and they had met in Antarctica, fell in love. Got married and been happily married for, I don't know, uh 20 plus, you know, some say however many years. And so it's just amazing to me that there is this seventh continent on which life exists. And we can't forget about so speaking of family, talking about my uncle, all the things of that. Um, I mean, Margie, it's I I I anyone who knows your daughter, knows you, knows your grandchildren, knows your family, knows that you like this your family's just incredible. And that's the other reason why was so excited when you reached out and said, hey, I want to be on. I'm like, yes, please. that you don't have to convince me. So with that, please tell us all you want to tell us about your wonderful, amazing family. Well, I guess it would start off with the grandparents. They came from Ireland, either regular grandparent or great. So I knew that they were from there, but I did one of those DNA type things. And it turned out I was 100 % Irish, but I thought 100%. So that was always kind of an amazing thing to me. I have a husband and his name is Larry for 51 years and he's been a great partner. love through all my schooling, work. We built a business together, which is a Christmas tree and landscape business and raised a family. My parents, both loving and nurturing no matter what career I chose, did not try to gear me in any direction with my schooling. My grandmother, who I only had one grandmother because my mother had me at 38 and so all the other grandparents were not alive and then my one that was alive, she was 75 when I was born. So this woman was born in 1882 and she held off marrying for eight years. She married at 35 and she dated my grandfather for eight years. She had two children and then my grandfather died. So we called her Gram. She got on a train from Indiana and headed to Southern California. where she designed and built a home and she worked until she was 71 in the insurance field. We have four children, we have 15 grandchildren, and I virtually knew no one that was a nurse. Our family had lots of friends, but I did not know one even personally. My sister had a friend that was a nurse, but as far as personal encounter, nobody. I had cousins back East that were nurses, but we only saw them a couple times in my lifetime because they live 3,000 miles away. So that was that history there. And then in turn, we have our children and the fourth one will be getting married soon. you know, the grandkids have been actually a delight. They've all been super kids. 11 of the 15 are girls for boys. And I adore the boys. Yes. the princes of the bunch and and definitely outnumbered. well, there's two different jumping points I can take off here. so the question I wanna ask you, the doves tal dovetails right off this discussion of family, is who is your hero? have to say she's no longer alive, but it was my mother. ah She was a very inclusive person and very smart and fun. So those aspects about her, I just love. She loved me no matter what. wasn't whatever career I chose, she would have been happy as long as I was happy. That's really where she came from. And um so I had a great time with her. She came up to visit us. since we moved quite a distance from her, pretty frequently. My father died when I was about 28. And I felt, I was fond of my father, of course, but my mother was alive longer while I was alive. So I really got to know her even more. sh she was in Southern California then her entire life at that point. Yeah. At that point, she was five years old when she moved there with her mom. And then she lived there her entire life, thought it was the best place in the world to live. I I so then the second dovetail question was just that. Um you're one of the first people I've talked to that have uh grew up in Southern California, right? Very populous area, and now has lived four and a half plus decades in a super small rural town. So what do you love most about your... compare and contrast and what do you love most about your hometowns? will say I have lived in smaller places than St. Maries. So I left Mala, Washington because of my husband's work, which was a, you know, one horse town with a store. And then we lived in Republic where the reception on the radio was very murky and there were not that many services. So when we moved to St. Maries, I thought, there's a pool. I can hear radio station. I mean my bar started to really change and so then I thought we got a few more things here and that was in the middle of the winter so I saw that pool wasn't open but there was a hole for a pool and so then I would have to say the what I liked about a big city and I'm very comfortable in a big city I had just gotten back from New York City I was very comfortable working at Sacred Heart is that I enjoy the people, the diversity, the cultures that you find in a big city. And that is what I do enjoy. What I love about our little hometown, everybody knows one another. So you can have, and I just was one to a celebration of life, where I almost was thinking maybe 50 would show up, 350 plus. There are fundraisers, somebody has cancer. their house is burning a fire. Our little town will generate $50,000 to $100,000 with a fundraiser, which for a small town, think that's just astronomical. And they support you. You know, we have a new restaurant in town. We all build up the restaurant. I was there last night with a nurse friend and I'm telling them how wonderful it is. And I'm thinking, this is just like St. Maries. We build each other up. because that is our nice new restaurant in town. So, and you know, we had for 40 years, a Christmas tree business. The town was amazing how they come out here. We had a Christmas shop and you know, I just loved it all. So there is that charm. And the other thing about our small town, which I really love it and every place we travel, we come home and say, there's no place like home. It is. absolutely beautiful here. We live on a farm. We have elk in our yard frequently. ah You can get on a four-wheeler and go to Montana. We kayak down the St. Joe. And it's like those precious gems you can't do without traveling very far. So that is right here. And that is what I enjoy. And you meet some of your dearest friends here. And so you know everything about one another, the good, the bad, and the ugly. and you really want to keep your nose clean. Because if you don't, it will go, you know, be exaggerated, but you got the consequences of behavior that might not be, you know, so there's, there can be the dark side, but people get over it. Like the, the, the one I was saying about the celebration of life, you know, he wasn't the most, he was kind of a wild guy and everybody did not care. They all loved him. They all came. He died young. And it was like, you know, there's nobody like him. So people embrace that. And it is really cool with the small town feel that way. I know everybody. I can go into the grocery store and seriously know somebody down every aisle. But I also can go into that same grocery store and sometimes not know people because We are getting, it's becoming a destination spot because of the beauty around here. People are camping and boating and that kind of thing. Yeah. Oh, it just it sounds to me like it's very very high on community. You know what I mean? Like the community is such a such a thing. Oh, that just I you know, part of me I think I would love to live in a small town, uh, you know what I mean? But n having not grown up in a small town, uh that was one of those things. My wife and I flirted with it, my capstone experience before I got my ADN. I went up and uh served at Colville, at Mount Carmel. Yeah, because I knew I wanted to go into Piz Oncology at that point. And so I just wanted a taste. I wanted to see what is rural and my grandma lived up there at the time. So I got to stay at her house, got to do that, and it was amazing, and my wife is like, Don't you get any ideas? We're we're not moving to a small town. Alright, babe, all right, I got it. well then the last jumping off point from what you said before, you know what I mean? You said you have nobody in your family that was necessarily you know, you didn't really know any nurses or anything like that. So that begs the natural question, and yes, we are finally getting into the major topic. Of why this podcast exists. So, Margie, why nursing? Well, I remember when I was nine years old, my father, an ambulance came to the house and they took him out. He had chest pain. And he said to me, Margie, do good in school. Well, that was like God spoke, because he went out of the house on a gurney and I thought, oh boy, I better start answering questions. I better start doing, like extending myself more in the school world. So I started to up my my game at school and that really carried on. So then come high school years, I really have an interest in so many things. Everything sounds fascinating. To be a pilot would be interesting. mean, literally everything to me, if you have that kind of personality, sounded good. So then I thought, well, how can I be a mother? Because I wanted to be a mother, work not full time, but more part time, and have it all. basically in my mind, how could I have it all? And nursing has so many areas you can get into. So I thought, okay, nursing makes a logical choice. I sort of reasoned it out in my mind without really guidance from anybody in my own brain. And then I applied to UCLA and that's when I started in my pre-nursing right there. Wow, incredible. I uh and and I guess the second part of this question really too is let's talk about nursing school because you know like you you have quite the history with that. We're we're not talking necessarily about careers yet at this point, but nursing school, like so you decide you want to do nursing and yet you've hit many different degrees along the road. So just talk to us about that journey as far as like Why s I mean, apparently you must have loved it somewhat because you kept going back for more. So talk to us about nursing school. Well, so I got pregnant so easily. I had three kids by the time I was 22. So it really took, and then we lived in small places. So it took a certain amount of resilience to keep doing it, keep doing it. But all in all, so there were eight colleges, but five nursing programs. And I felt like You know, when I lived in these small towns, I didn't entirely know people. So I had that time when the kids were sleeping and I put them to bed in the evening and then I'd study hard. And so I feel like to really do well in nursing school, you have to put the time in. You can think you can get away with not putting the time in, but I had to put time and effort for me in particular. And... I feel like sometimes when people are not happy with nursing schools and they have a grudge against somebody, they didn't necessarily put the time in. And so they didn't get the grade they wanted because it was really their fault on some level. Now there are exceptions to that. um so I myself, I felt like I really had to study hard to get the grades I wanted. And then consequently, didn't have a grudge against anybody. I knew I got what I deserved and I actually liked my teachers in all those different places. Well and then there was one time, I mean I want to say probably the toughest thing is when I was working on my masters and in my uh thesis group, the chair, I just didn't like you know she wanted me to change and and or and the and articles, you know, and it was in my mind getting nitpicky and then she wanted her name on it too because in that program they have to publish also. And so it all kind of rubbed me in an unusual way. So I thought this isn't working out. I'm not feeling good about it, especially when it seemed nitpicky. The meat of the matter I'd already done. So I ended up getting the Dean of the program. to be my chair and people said, Margie, she's very ethereal. She's very, you know, this is years ago. She's not even there now. And I thought, I'm going to give it a shot. I loved her. I absolutely loved her. And we worked so good together and she offered such good advice. And I thought, it made me realize that if something's not going well, you got to make a change. Like in this case, it was with the thesis chair. Or you've got to study harder to get better grades, or maybe you've got to change the program if you just feel like you're at what's end in the program you're at. But I never changed a program based on grades are not liking somebody. It was our moving that changed everything. So in that regard, I was really glad how that ended with that thesis and um all of that, we were a good fit. And and and what a like I it Is don't judge a book by its cover, right? Like I y you know, you're talking about all these people going, Man, I don't you know, you're not gonna like this person, da da da and they're they're trying to give you this preconceived notion about this this woman who you're like, d no, I'm gonna give this a go, and that turns out to be one of the most amazing experiences, right? Yeah. Oh, incredible. So Margie, I'm looking at the time, and I know we've spent the bulk of this particular episode talking about your history, talking about your family, talking about your life. And what I would love to do, if you're alright with it, is we're gonna pivot. We're gonna turn you into a what w what we like to call a two-parter around these parts, which means that uh we'll just dive into a second episode here where we begin to we know I'll ask you a couple more fluff questions, but mostly well, I wanna focus on your career, I wanna focus on your passions and why it is that you wanted to come on this podcast. So is that alright with you? Can we make you a two-parter? sounds great. Alright, at the risk of alienating some of my audience, we're gonna turn this just like an LP. We're gonna go, this is the end of side A. You're gonna wanna flip over to side B, which will drop in, let's see, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, three days from now. And also, I don't know, this is kind of fun too. Bethany, I'm doing this for you. Now you gotta wait three days to hear your mom some more. So it's it's double the pleasure, double the fun. And so join us on part two of the Margie Cooke Experience on Saturday.