Papal Prop Bets, Dribbling, and Kristi Noem Robbery | Ep. 43

Gambling's influence has quietly reshaped American culture—from sports commentary to religious speculation and even everyday conversation. When announcers prioritize betting lines over game results and crypto platforms host papal prop bets, it’s clear we’ve entered a new era. This video explores how gambling mindsets have infiltrated our values, warped our view of success, and turned everything into a wager.

Chapters

• 0:00 Gambling on Pope Francis's Successor
• 3:10 Sports Nation to Gambling Nation
• 6:40 NBA Rules Only Exist in Theory
• 12:20 The 24-Hour Poker Session Dilemma
• 18:10 Cody Bellinger's Chicken Wing Disaster
• 20:40 Hockey's Two-Intermission Problem

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:00

Alex Ovechkin broke Wayne Gretzky's all-time scoring record earlier this month. It came in the second period of a game. I missed it because I had already switched to a sponge pants Sponge pants square bob rerun on Nick at Night. Norman Chad Norman Chad Welcome to Gambling Mad with Norman Chad. I am Norman Chad Coming up today on the program. Will the NBA ever call a traveling violation again? Will the NHL ever get rid of their second intermission? Will Cody Bellinger ever order chicken wings again?

Speaker 1: 0:53

Gambling Mad as always, brought to you by Fritos picked fresh off of Central California trees every morning, delivered directly to your local retailer every afternoon, and by the refreshing taste of Fresca, fritos and Fresca. It's a meal. Catholics around the world are mourning the death of Pope Francis. On the other hand, because of the world we currently occupy, gamblers have a different opinion. Polymarket, which is a wagering slash, predictions slash, cryptocurrency warehouse that seems to operate in the shadows of US law, has many betting opportunities in regard to the papacy. Polymarket says there has been $2 million wagered on prop-related pope bets. One of the props had been whether there would be a new pope in 2025. With Francis's death, that is now a massive favorite for those who wagered yes.

Speaker 1: 1:59

There are several other Vatican related wagering categories that I doubt the church would approve. For instance, will the next pope be gay? That's got to be a no huh. Will the next pope be trans? That's really got to be a no huh. And will the next pope be black? I'll say this I like black chances more than trans chances. And finally, the big question who will be the next pope? Italian, pietro Parolin, the Vatican's Secretary of State since 2013,. Has a 37% chance of being Francis's successor. Filipino, luis Antonio Tagle is next, at 22%. He would be the first Pope from Asia. And then, as we go down the list, we reach the longest of long shots at 1% a 1% chance to be the next Pope. Two surprise choices Donald J Trump and Stephen A Smith. I made that last part up. I hope I did so. Has gambling taken over our culture? What is that? A trick question? Here is example 7,246 of how Sports Nation has morphed into Gambling Nation, of how Sports Nation has morphed into Gambling Nation During last week's St Louis Battle Hawks-Arlington Renegades-UFL game.

Speaker 1: 3:31

You heard me right? That's a United Football League clash. That's a pro football league between the Battle Hawks and the Renegades, right in the smack of spring On the game-deciding play. Espn announcer Roy Philpott worked in the over under on the call. It was fourth down and goal. Half a minute left St Louis trying to tie the game. The Renegades intercepted the pass and returned it all the way for a touchdown, with Philpott's final excited words being and the over somehow hits on the pick six from 100 yards away. This is amazing. He smoothly incorporated the total the over under you could bet on how many points would be scored into his play-by-play description. It was treated with equal importance, if not more importance, than the fact that Arlington had just defeated St Louis.

Speaker 1: 4:31

Welcome to the new America, mama. Don't let your babies grow up to be gamblers. Okay, so sports betting is hard, so hard that I recommend that no one should do it seriously Recreationally. If you can control it, fine. Anything beyond recreationally not a good idea.

Speaker 1: 4:55

Keeping that in mind, I wanted to give a shout out to a professional sports bettor I follow on X, devon's Bookie At. Devon's Bookie is where you can find him. Now he has a service where he sells his handicapping. I cannot and will not vouch for that, but I enjoy him on X because his prognosticating seems above average and he seems to be very honest. He sometimes puts his betting tickets on X so you can see if he wins or loses.

Speaker 1: 5:29

This week he had one of the greatest tickets I have ever seen. He had a two-pick parlay. He needed the Yankees' Clark Schmidt to walk at least two batters and he needed the Guardians' two batters and he needed the Guardians Gavin Williams to walk at least two batters to win his prop bet. Coincidentally, they were opposing starters that day in in the Yankees-Guardians game, so he had to have both starting pitchers walk two batters or more in the game to cash in. And you know what happened. Each of them each of them walked two batters in the first inning Game over Ka-ching for Devin's bookie, just like that. I mean. It's almost as good if you bet the coin flip at the Super Bowl Ka-ching for Devin's bookie, just like that. I mean it's almost as good if you bet the coin flip at the Super Bowl, you win or lose before the game's over. You can relax. This over-under bet was over after the first inning.

Speaker 1: 6:35

I am watching the NBA playoffs, enjoying the NBA playoffs a lot, hoping my long-shot Denver Nuggets can survive the treacherous Western Conference, somehow win the NBA title at 14 to 1 odds and bring me into the black for my springtime futures bets. Hey, a kid could dream. As I watch the NBA postseason, I am reminded of three realities of modern pro basketball that boggle the mind, well, at least boggle my deteriorating mind. One to get called for a traveling violation, a player must carry the ball from half court to the basket without dribbling. Two to get whistled for a three-second violation, a player must stand in the lane without moving for at least 12 seconds. And three, it is apparently impossible for any NBA player to violate the league rule for carrying or palming the ball. Okay, let me read to you directly. This is NBA rule number 10, section 11, small d A player who is dribbling may not put any part of his hand under the ball.

Speaker 1: 7:52

And one, carry it from one point to another, or two, bring it to a pause and then continue to dribble again. Folks, there are multitudes of NBA players who do exactly what that rule describes every time they dribble the ball. You know, the only thing I could do when I played basketball as a kid was dribble. I know dribbling. So okay in the NBA. Okay, they take the ball, they dribble it. It then comes back into their hand, they turn it over and they hold it like a muffin, they hold it like a it's a melon and then they turn it around and dribble it again. Okay, it is palming. I know I can't hold like I used to. Back, when I was in my prime, I was about 6'2 1⁄2" and I had bigger hands and I could palm the ball. Anyway, it's palming. They dribble the ball, they go like this and they go like this again. Okay, it's illegal, it's allowed for every 48 minutes of every NBA game. Don't tell me otherwise. I know what I know and this is what I know. Watch, by the way, they invented a term LeBron James does the crab dribble. It's like a crab that's going over that ball, and he goes like this every time. It's the crab dribble no, it's palming, it's a violation and I love LeBron. And he goes like this every time. It's the crab dribble no, it's palming. It's a violation and I love LeBron. This is a court-ordered. Actually, it's a therapist-ordered light.

Speaker 1: 9:27

Donald Trump week for gambling mad. According to my shrink, we cleanse and spiritually rejuvenate ourselves when we do not obsess over the current White House occupants. So I'm just going to give you one quick Donald Trump item and then we're through with him for the rest of the podcast. I have known since the 20th century that Donald Trump was a business fraud for two reasons. One, he could not run a profitable casino. Most casinos are cash cows. Trump's casinos were bankruptcies in progress. Two, he single-handedly ruined any chance the USFL the United States Football League had of succeeding in the mid-1980s. It was a spring football league, like the current UFL, and it had some chances, but Trump came in and he ruined it.

Speaker 1: 10:32

On that topic, for those of you who still read now, I lost everybody. For those of you who still read now, I lost everybody. For those of you who still read, I heartily recommend a 2018 book by Jeff Perlman entitled Football for a Buck the Crazy Rise and Demise of the USFL. It's a wonderful book, even before you get to the parts about Trump's demolition of the league as owner of the New Jersey Generals. Speaking of reading, I'm also going to recommend highly recommend that you run, not walk.

Speaker 1: 11:10

You run to the World Wide Web and find an article published this week in the Guardian newspaper by Canadian writer Stephen Marsh. It is headlined the America I Love is Gone. It is really, really, really good. It's better than anything AI could create, at least. Yet I would send you the link to it right now. You know, copy paste the link to you, but I don't have those technological capabilities while sitting in this podcast chair. Just go to the Guardian online, theguardiancom, or Google. Stephen Marsh that is spelled M-A-R-C-H-E. Spend five minutes reading. This is the America. The America I love is gone. I read it while drinking a fresca. I live in America and I found it more enlightening than anything any American has said to me this year. That is inclusive of my staff.

Speaker 1: 12:13

The person we entrust with the security of our homeland is under fire this week because she could not provide security for her own handbag. Christine Noem was eating dinner in a Washington DC restaurant when her handbag was stolen. The Homeland Security Secretary's purse contained her driver's license, apartment keys, makeup bag, department access badge, medication, passport, blank checks and $3,000 in cash. Usually, if a woman is walking around with $3,000 in cash and a passport, her first name is Thelma or Louise. In her defense, her first name is Thelma or Louise. In her defense, a Department of Home Security spokesperson said that is an expensive dinner unless her family is the Kardashians. Hey, but in her defense also, I'm going to give her props here. I respect people who go cash instead of credit card. We stand tall. No suspects yet, but I suspect if one of the inmates from that El Salvadoran mega prison escaped someone who was there the day Kristi Noem did a photo op in front of them wearing a Rolex watch, that criminal would come after her first. Just a theory.

Speaker 1: 13:45

I had the pleasure and the pain of a 12-hour poker session earlier this week at Hollywood Park Casino in Inglewood, california, my home casino. It's a long time in a casino and it reminded me of the fact that back in the day, unfortunately, I recorded two sessions that exceeded 24 hours. That's more than a full day 24 hours sitting in the casino playing poker. Should you ever play 24 straight hours? It depends.

Speaker 1: 14:20

Okay now, usually when you're losing a lot that's why you stay a long time it's not a good idea. You're chasing your losses and it's tough to get it back. First of all, luck runs in cycles. It really does. If you're having a bad day, it's usually best to cut your losses. Just, stuff comes in waves. The bad luck can continue. Go home. The other thing is it's a curious thing. It's pretty simple when you're winning, you play better. When you're losing, you play worse. So you got a lot of factors against you during the course of a 24-hour. You know there's bad decision making. When you are losing, fatigue starts to set in. Sometimes alcohol affects your judgment. But I got to tell you and I wear the 24-hour sessions like a badge of honor the thing is that when you're losing a whole lot, it's just besides the fact that I know we're kind of sick. We need the action.

Speaker 1: 15:16

There's an incredible challenge involved in just trying to climb a steep hill all the way. It's very tempting to climb that hill and get your money back. And the weird thing is and this is how screwed up we are back. And the weird thing is and this is how screwed up we are Sometimes. Let's say I've been down in my game. I've been down and say, let's say it's $2,300, which is a lot of money in this particular game. You know I I'll come all the way back and I'll be like only $150 down, which is incredibly good. And it's about time for me to go home. And I've been there eight or 10 hours but I still haven't gotten to even yet. And just trying to take that last step to even, I then lose a couple of pots and there I'm there again another six or eight hours. I ended up losing $1,500 to $2,000 because we're stupid. We're stupid, but I want to get it all back.

Speaker 1: 16:07

And the other thing about the 24 hour session is how depressing it is from this standpoint. Let's say you start at four o'clock in the afternoon. You're still there the next morning. You've played overnight. You're there the next morning the day. Shift workers are returning. They see you in the same seat at the same table, wearing the same clothes. You might as well just you know mark a loser on your chest. The regular players are returning, who you played with the day before the afternoon. They see you in the same seat at the same table, in the same clothes.

Speaker 1: 16:41

It just doesn't feel real good. Okay, you don't look good, you don't sound good, you don't smell good, I'm sure. But if you're able to complete the epic comeback, there is no better feeling in gaming or gambling than making that comeback. I know this sounds ridiculous. It's stupid from a money standpoint, but I would rather win $100 coming back from $2,000 down than, say, just win $400 in a regular session. It's much more of an accomplishment to overcome all the obstacles to get your money back and leave in the black.

Speaker 1: 17:21

I don't do that anymore. I don't necessarily have the stamina to do it and also my family has not appreciated it. When I first met my lovely wife Tony, and we got together and she had her two small kids, isaiah and Mia, and I'd go out in the afternoon to play poker and then sometimes I'd come back at seven o'clock in the morning and Mia's getting ready to go to school as an eight-year-old and she looked at me and go where have you been? I go I've been at work, mia. I got to go to the casino so I can put, you know, bread and bacon on the table and she said it's not normal for a man to walk into the house at seven o'clock in the morning and that was generally the house rule. They all believe that. So I have to avoid it now, but I do miss it. Can't go 24 hours anymore.

Speaker 1: 18:14

On a recent road trip to Detroit, yankees outfielder Cody Bellinger ordered room service chicken wings at the team hotel. They were just your basic bone-in wings no sauces, no spices, no rub. He enjoyed them, but then at 4 am he woke up sweating and he proceeded to throw up repeatedly for several hours. It was food poisoning and he had to sit out that day's game against the Tigers. As a result, cody Bellinger has sworn off eating chicken wings for five years. I'm going to take the under. First of all, I believe Bellinger loves chicken wings. He's going to have a taste for them again. Second of all, I am going to rely on my own personal experience in this area.

Speaker 1: 19:09

Half a lifetime ago I was in Atlantic City with my good buddy, vinnie Perrone. We used to go on day trips to Atlantic City every few months from Washington DC because we were young, we were stupid and we hadn't ever gone to Las Vegas yet. I convinced him one night in Atlantic City on our dinner break to go to an all-you-can-eat seafood buffet along the boardwalk. It cost like $5.99 or $6.99. I ate a dump truck worth of mussels. I love mussels. Later that evening on our drive home, I started sweating. Then I got pretty nauseous. Then I started screaming to Vinny to pull over to the side of the road on Interstate 95 so I could start vomiting my guts out. I had food poisoning. Forget five years. I swore off muscles. I swore I would never eat muscles again. Maybe 12, 15 months later I ate musclessels again. I love mussels, maybe more than life itself. Since then? I have ordered them dozens and dozens of times.

Speaker 1: 20:23

Cody Bellinger, you're going to want chicken wings again? Just don't order any wings in Detroit. Before we wrap up, I'm going to say this one time and one time only it's time for hockey to consider halftime. All my NHL friends love to tell me that there's nothing better in professional sports than the National Hockey League postseason. Well, I'm never going to find out if that's true, because hockey, unlike football and basketball and soccer, refuses to play with just one halftime intermission.

Speaker 1: 21:05

Tragically, hockey games are divided into three 20-minute periods with two intermissions, that's two 15-minute breaks. If I'm at home taking in some TV and you give me two 15-minute opportunities to you know, watch something else or walk away. I'm going to end up watching something else or walking away. I'm going to end up watching something else or walking away. This ain't the 17th century, this is a go, go, go culture. Speaking of the 17th century and nobody likes to talk about this William Shakespeare wrote all of his plays in five acts and, trust me, people were flooding out of London theaters after acts two, three or four. I mean, I don't care how great Othello, hamlet or Macbeth is supposed to be. Nobody is sticking around through four intermissions. How could the NHL not take note of this so recently? What? Alex Ovechkin broke Wayne Gretzky's all-time scoring record earlier this month.

Speaker 1: 22:15

It came in the second period of a game. I missed it because I had already switched to a sponge pants sponge pants square bob rerun on Nick at Night. On Nick at Night, patrick was trying to grow a beard and he went to the squid guy and he wanted to get some help on growing the beard and becoming more mature. It was pretty good. That'll do it for another edition of Gambling Mad with Norman Chad. Hope to see you again next time and remember, if you're going to roll the dice, make sure they're loaded.

Speaker 1: 22:57

I still ride the bus. They say no one in LA takes the bus unless they don't have a car, but I hate to drive and I love the bus. There are unspoken rules on the bus. They aren't that complicated. One of them is you give up your seat to someone who needs it. I've been doing that my whole life. A woman might have a lot of shopping bags or an elderly person boards. You don't make them walk to the back of the bus. You give up your seat. This isn't automatic.

Speaker 1: 23:27

Well, it took me a while to realize it, but I'm now on the flip side of this equation. I am the person who needs the goddamn seat, with my bad back, bad knees and bad mobility Plus, as I'm constantly told, I'm just plain old. But these 20-something and 30-something punks won't move, won't budge, won't even make eye contact. So start spreading the news. The next time I board a crowded bus, if not a single young whippersnapper moves their lazy ass to allow me to rest my 60 something bones and body, I will simply plop down on their entitled lap and they're gonna take it and they're gonna like it, or I will go gambling mad gambling mad with norman chad is written by norman chad and ghosts, written by norman chad.

Speaker 2: 24:16

Executive producers are john scheinberg and rick barrio dill. Produced by norman chad and rick barrio dill. Our associate producers are brie coorey and asher friedberg and edited by asher friedberg, with studio facilities at 360 pod studios, beverly hills.