Who Do You Take Advice From?

People love to offer advice and during seasons of transition it's offered even more.  Sometimes one person will tell you to do one thing and then another person will tell to do the opposite.  Who do you listen to?  When everyone has an opinion how do to cut through all the noise?  What is the best option for you?  Lets talk about advice, about who to listen to and who to tune out.

Transcript:

Hello, my name is Tiffany, and welcome to the podcast Working on Amazing.

This is the podcast where we talk about the work that it takes to rebuild an amazing life.

And I use that word rebuild because we're specifically designed for women who are middle-aged and feel like they're starting over, right there in the middle of their life.

If that's you, first of all, I want to say I'm truly sorry.

I know from experience how itch that feels.

But I also want to say it gets so much better.

You can have such an amazing life.

There is hope.

You're not alone.

You're actually in the right place.

So welcome.

I am so glad that you're here.

So let's get down to today's episode.

If you remember in the beginning, I said there were five areas I focused on when I rebuilt my life.

I focused on my spiritual health.

I focused on my mental health, my physical health, my financial health, and growth and goals.

In today's episode, I'm going to categorize under mental health.

I guess it almost is one of those that falls outside of a normal category.

Maybe it could go under growth and goals.

I'm not sure.

You tell me what you think.

But today, I want to talk about who you listen to, who you get advice from.

Have you ever noticed when you're in a season of transition, an obvious season of transition, people are much more likely to give you advice.

Do you remember if you've ever been pregnant?

So much advice.

Strangers in the grocery store would give me advice when I was pregnant, right?

Graduate in high school, graduate in college.

People would give me lots of advice, like, this is what you should do, this is how you should be.

And when I got divorced, and I'm watching my sister go through the death of her spouse and transition from being in a couple to being a widow and single, lots of people give her advice.

So I think people in general notice when you're in a season of transition and change and moving from one thing to another, and they can't help it, they want to tell you what they think you should do.

I have to believe this is born out of a good thing, not a bad thing, they're trying to help, right?

It's their way of trying to help.

But some of this advice is contradictory.

Like, my sister got told by some people, you need to invest in real estate.

If you're moving, you need to buy a house.

Other people are like, you can't do all the upkeep and mow the yard and do all that.

You need to rent.

Who do you listen to when you're in a major season of transition, especially in midlife?

Who do you listen to in all that advice?

And everybody saying, oh, you should start dating again.

Oh, you need to do this.

You need to whatever it is.

It feels overwhelming.

And like I said, sometimes the advice is contradictory.

You don't need to date.

You need to learn to love yourself.

You need a man in your life.

You know what I mean?

It's back and forth.

So I want to talk about how we decide who to listen to and how to filter out all the noise of all that advice.

Okay?

So what I came to realize pretty early on, as I was going through my divorce and in that season, and a freshly minted single mom, I remember saying,