How to Pick a New Hobby

When life changes suddenly — through divorce, loss, job transition, or another unexpected shift — one of the quietest but most jarring changes is time.

There are evenings that feel too long.
Weekends that feel empty.
Silence where there used to be conversation.

Rebuilding your life isn’t just about healing emotionally or getting financially stable — it’s also about being intentional with your time. And that’s where hobbies come in.

But if you’re in midlife and don’t already “have a hobby,” starting something new can feel intimidating. Where do you even begin?

In this episode, we’re talking about how to thoughtfully and confidently choose a hobby that fits who you are now — not who you were 20 years ago.

Transcript

Hello, my name is Tiffany, and welcome to the podcast, Working on Amazing. This is a podcast where we talk about the work that it takes to rebuild an amazing life.

Now, in today's episode, we're gonna be talking about hobbies, and finding a new hobby potentially. It feels odd to look for a hobby when you're middle age.

You feel like if you haven't already found one, and it's part of your identity, why even bother? It feels odd, like, weird to try new hobbies, but I'm telling you, it's really important, and it's a good and healthy thing to do.

I mean, think about it when your life changes, when it feels like you're starting over, and that could be because of death or divorce. All kinds of things can lead us to that point. But there's an unexpected shift in that change.

And one of the most jarring shifts that a lot of people aren't prepared for is time. Suddenly, the evenings feel too long, right? The weekends feel empty.

There's a silence where there used to be conversation. So rebuilding your life isn't just about healing emotionally, even though that's important, or getting on track financially, even though that's important.

It's also about being intentional with your time, and that's where a hobby comes in. If you're in the middle of your life and you don't already have a hobby, starting something new can kind of feel intimidating, right? Where do you even begin?

So that's what we're going to talk about today. We're going to talk about how to thoughtfully and confidently choose a hobby that fits you, who you are, what's going to serve you best, what types of things will be a good hobby for you. All right?

So why do hobbies matter? If you're in a season of starting over, of rebuilding your life, why is a hobby important? Because a hobby is something more than just how we pass our time.

A healthy hobby can reduce loneliness, it can improve your mental health, it can boost your confidence, it can create community, it can help you rediscover who you are, it can give you your brain a break from grief and overthinking, it can create

momentum in a season where you may feel stuck. So this is about living intentionally and not just surviving a quiet evening.

2:49

Finding a New Hobby

All right? So let's go through how to find a hobby in middle age step by step. So step one, ask yourself, why do you want a hobby?

Clarify what you need, because different hobbies serve different purposes. So maybe ask yourself, do I want to relax and decompress? That could be a good thing that you want to do.

Maybe you want to learn something new. Do I want to meet new people? Do I want to feel productive?

Do I want to move my body? Do I need a creative outlet? Am I trying to feel quiet time, or am I trying to rediscover joy?

For those questions, let me tell you, there is no right or wrong answer. But your why you're looking for a hobby will help guide you to a good fit for you. So understanding why, what are you looking for?

All right? Number two, decide what season you're in. And that kind of sounds silly, but hear me out on this.

Not every hobby fits every emotional season. So if you are deeply grieving, a gentle, repetitive hobby is going to feel safest. But if you're feeling isolated, a group-based hobby might really be life-giving for you.

And if you're rebuilding confidence, skill-based hobbies can create momentum. So just be really honest about your emotional capacity right now. Step three, start small.

I think one of the mistakes we make in midlife is thinking that we have to be good at something immediately.

We've learned a lot, we've gone through our learning curve, we went through school, and we feel like if we do something, we need to be good at it. But you don't. You're allowed to be a beginner again.

That's okay. So here's what I would suggest. Try a 30-day experiment.

Choose a hobby, commit lightly, and give yourself permission to quit if it's not a good fit. So it's not a marriage, it's an exploration. Try it, and like I said, commit lightly, like I will try this for 30 days.

But if I don't like it, I'm not committed to it. I don't have to go all in. So I think that is important.

Step four, maybe revisit what you loved before. Ask yourself, what did you love as a child? What did you enjoy before life got busy?

What have you always said, I wish I could learn that? Sometimes clues are in your past. What have you said before?

What are you kind of drawn to? What just made you happy when you were a kid, you know? Think about your happiest times, what you gravitated to, what you did a lot, and maybe there's a clue there in a hobby.

And number five, let's remove pressure. What do I mean by that? A hobby is not a side hustle, it's not a productivity tool, and it's not a competition, all right?

It doesn't need to make money, it doesn't need to impress anyone, and it doesn't have to be posted on social media. It only needs to serve you, all right?

6:48

Hobby Suggestions

So with those steps in mind, let's think about some different hobbies. Let's brainstorm together, all right? To get you some ideas, and there are way more than what I'm gonna list, but just to get you thinking, what might be a good hobby for me?

So if you want to relax, some good options might be knitting or crocheting, an adult coloring book. That's a good hobby if you want to relax. Watercolor painting or drawing is a good relaxing hobby.

Reading or even joining a book club or added connection, but reading is a really good hobby. Gardening is a good relaxing hobby. Journaling, these are all things that are calming hobbies, that they create a gentle focus.

They're gentle, they're relaxing, they're calming. If you want to learn something new, a good option could be taking guitar or piano lessons. That could be fun, right?

You could take an online course. There's so many online courses today. So you could learn a new skill, all kinds of different things.

You could start cooking or baking. I've always wanted to learn how to do sourdough. I know so many people did that during COVID.

I didn't. And I've said, that's something I wanna pick up as a hobby. I wanna learn how to make sourdough.

And there's so many online tutorials. It would be a good thing to learn. So, but there's all kinds of cooking things.

People get into baking and all sorts of things. Maybe you could pick a new cuisine, and you wanna try to learn that style of cuisine, how to make it. If you wanna learn something new, you could get into photography.

There is so much to learn once you really get into photography. I just barely brushed the surface for a while. I got a fancy camera, and I learned a lot, but not near enough.

I got the book, Cameras for Dummies. I can't remember what it was. It was something.

But there is a lot when it comes to photography, and it's very creative and a neat skill to learn, so you could think about that. You could learn a new language. I find language is fascinating.

You could maybe say, okay, my hobby is going to be, I'm going to learn a new language. I'm going to pick a language, and then maybe the whole goal is, I've got these financial goals. I'm setting aside money for a vacation.

I want to travel to a different place, and my hobby that supports this financial goal is going to be, I'm going to learn the language of this place I want to visit. That could be the way goals support each other. That's kind of cool.

So, there are lots of hobbies around learning something new. If you're looking for community, you need to connect with people, you might want to join a book club.

So, reading and a book club, those are two hobbies, and that could be a very good hobby. It's low, it doesn't require a lot from you, you know?

The demand on your time is very low, they might be like once a month, everybody's different, of course, but it's not a high demand type of hobby. There are hiking groups, and people get together and go on hikes, that could be very fun.

Churches offer small groups, so you could find a group of people, maybe your age or in your area in life, and hang out with people like that. That could be a cool thing to do.

There are fitness classes, so maybe your hobby is, I really want to get in shape, and I'm going to start spending a little bit more time at the gym. I'm going to start taking these classes. Those people bond together.

It's really cool how you form a kind of little bit of community and the people that take classes together. It's really neat. Another thing, if you want a hobby that is tied to community and connection with other people, you could volunteer.

Volunteering is always a good thing to do. You could find an organization that supports a cause that's near and dear to your heart. And how can you connect there?

You could start spending time volunteering. Because connection is healing, especially after loss. So those are just some thoughts and ideas.

Those are not all of the hobbies by any means. But that's just a little bit of an idea to get maybe your mind thinking on that track. Like, what could I think about?

Do I want a hobby that's relaxing? Or do I want to learn something new? Or do I need to kind of put myself out there and start interacting with the world again?

Peopling, that's what my sister and I call it. Now, I need to people today, you know, be around some more people. So maybe based on what you feel like you need, you know, can kind of guide your thoughts about a hobby.

12:20

Intentional Hobby Selection

If your evenings feel quiet right now, that doesn't mean your life is empty. It means that space is opened. And space can be scary.

Think about a blank page. But space can also be sacred. Choosing a hobby is one small way to say, I am building something new.

It's a way to take ownership. All the change that has happened in your life, maybe there's chaos and it's been topsy-turvy. This is a way for you to take ownership and say, this is what I'm going to do.

And be intentional with your time and how you want to spend it. Maybe some things to think about as you're looking, just picking up a new hobby is, what do I need most right now? Do I need rest?

Do I need growth? Or do I need connection? If you're going to pick a hobby that's relaxing, learning, or connecting, what one do you need the most right now?

Maybe ask yourself, what have I secretly always wanted to try? I always wanted to scuba dive. That's such a, something I think I always wanted to try even when I was a kid.

And I finally did get to learn that, and take the classes, and do all the stuff, and get certified, and that was so cool. Do you have something that you've always kind of wanted to try?

What about, as we went through the list of potential hobbies, which by no means was exhaustive or conclusive, but what feels light and what feels heavy? Maybe the fitness class at the gym feels a little too intimidating right now.

But the hiking group, maybe that, that's your speed. You know what I'm saying? I mean, like, think about it.

What feels light and what feels heavy? And it's gonna be different for everybody. Your answer is not right or wrong.

But when you look at the options, gravitate towards what feels light. You have enough heaviness in your life right now. Gravitate towards what feels light.

Maybe ask yourself, what would I attempt if I wasn't afraid of being bad at it? What would I attempt if I wasn't afraid of being bad at it? Oh, there are so many things, right?

And a hobby is a chance to learn. You get to be a beginner. It's okay.

Nobody has to know if you're bad at it at first. Skill is built over time, time and repetition, right? So maybe explore.

Maybe your first step is researching stuff online. I want to be a beekeeper. I've decided I want to keep bees.

I have a lot of research to do before I make any purchases or I actually get a beehive, right? I've got a lot of reading and a lot of research to do.

That's a big hobby to take on, but I've wanted to do it for a while and I think I will, but it's not something I just run out and purchase. I got to read about it, right? So maybe read, what does it take to become certified a scuba diver?

What does it take to do a beehive? What do I need to do if I want to start gardening? What's a simple entry-level thing that I could do this spring?

You know, maybe just start doing some research, maybe start Googling, asking a few questions, reading some articles, finding out what people say about the hobby you're potentially interested in. There are all kinds of hobbies out there.

Sometimes the first step to starting is reading about it, and that's okay, but take a step, especially if you feel like you've got a lot of empty time. This is a great time to live intentionally. It's a great time to start something new.

And if you don't like it, you don't have to keep doing it, and you could try something different.

16:59

Embrace New Beginnings

This is a beautiful season. It might be painful, it might be hard, and I'm not diminishing that. But there is a beauty in being able to have the time to try new things.

So focus on maybe a little bit of the beauty, and focus on the fact that now maybe you have some different time that maybe you didn't have before.

Maybe a hobby can get you out of the rut where you were feeling stuck, stuck in grief, stuck in emotional anguish. I don't know a better way to say it than emotional anguish.

But getting unstuck, and sometimes a hobby can give you a little bit of momentum, a little bit of connection, and a little bit of relaxation. And sometimes, that's exactly what we need in our life. I would love to hear from you.

I would love to know what your hobby is, because there's so many more than just a handful I mentioned. What do you do? When your life shifted, and you suddenly had different time on your hands, what did you do with it?

Did you pick up a new hobby in the middle of your life? I'm so fascinated by the people who don't pick up a hobby until they're in their 50s, and they excel at it. Like, they keep going and keep practicing, and they become so great at it.

That fascinates me. Have you picked up a new hobby? I would love, love, love to hear from you.

You can find me online, www.workingonamazing.com. You can also find me on social media. I have an account on several platforms, but I do hang out on Facebook the most.

And that's just a page, Working on Amazing. Come check me out. Drop me a line.

Send me a message. I would love to hear from you and know about your hobbies. Thank you so much for joining me today.

I look forward to talking to you next time. Bye.