Energetic Vibrations: How Your Mindset Shapes Reality with Beth Iaciofano

This episode I have an eye-opening conversation with Beth Iaciofano. We dive deep into the physics of energy, vibration, and how our mindset literally shapes the world we experience. Beth shares her remarkable journey from a 17-year middle school teaching career to becoming a certified master neuro-transformational mindset coach and intuitive medium. When faced with growing unhappiness despite a stable career, Beth courageously listened to her intuition and made the leap toward alignment with her true purpose.

Our conversation explores how emotions create specific energetic frequencies in our bodies. Low-vibration states like fear, anger, and shame can physically damage our bodies over time, while high-vibration states attract more positive experiences.

Ready to transform your understanding of energy, mindset, and personal power? This conversation will shift how you perceive your thoughts and emotions, and equip you with practical tools for creating the life you're truly meant for.

Guest Bio:

After stepping away from a 17-year career as a middle school science teacher, Beth found passion as a certified master neuro-transformational life coach and intuitive psychic & medium. These paths are intertwined as they both give her clients a sense of peace. As a life coach, Beth helps her clients transform their lives through identifying and clearing beliefs, patterns, and programming that no longer serve them. Beth guides them to the understanding that their thoughts, words, and emotions are what create their future, and she teaches them how to harness that power to create all that they desire.  As a medium, Beth connects her clients with their loved ones that have passed, and/or their spirit guides, in order to give them messages that will help them navigate their lives and feel a sense of peace and connection.

Find Beth:

Website, Podcast, Tik Tok, Freebie

This episode was produced by six-two.studio

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Karen Sarmento is a passionate and dedicated Nurse Practitioner for more than 18 years, CEO at Sarmento Mentoring Services LLC, and a Proctor Gallagher Certified Mindset Mentor. She specializes in empowering women to tap into their true potential. She understands the unique challenges faced by women because she too has battled some major challenges in her life. Karen does not let that define her; she believes it’s the challenges that have made her the limitless woman she is today. She whole-heartedly believes we hold all the power within and that we should stand tall together in the pursuit of greatness.

Karen has served thousands over the course of her career and has spent many years studying directly with world class mentors to gain a deep understanding of the science behind human behaviour and learning about the success principals that create lasting change and transformation. She will share her insights with you so you can feel unstoppable and limitless too.

Find Karen:
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Transcript

Karen Sarmento:

0:01

Have you ever felt that inner whisper nudging you towards something greater? We truly are a force of nature possessing our own incredible power within. We are all here to identify our own personal definition of success. We all have a story to tell. Join me as I dive into empowering concepts and have powerful conversations with extraordinary humans who have shattered limitations, overcome adversity and created remarkable success. I'm your host, Karen Sarmento, and we are meant for more. Hello and welcome to another episode of We Are Meant For More. Today, I have an amazing guest to share with you. Her name is Beth Iaciofano, and she is the host of the podcast The Hats we Wear, and it's such a fun podcast too. So welcome, Beth. Tell us a little about yourself.

Beth Iaciofano:

1:11

Thanks for having me, Karen. Yeah, I'm a former teacher of 17 years and I am now working as a. Well, I'm still teaching. I'm teaching college, but not middle school anymore, and I have my own business. I'm a certified master neuro-transformational mindset coach and I'm an intuitive medium as well, so I have a lot of different hats that I'm wearing.

Karen Sarmento:

1:33

Fascinating. How does one go from being a middle school teacher and now you're still teaching at the college level, but then transitioning to? There's a hefty title you have there. You'll have to tell us more about that as well. But how does one go from that transition?

Beth Iaciofano:

1:52

I had had enough. I think that's what it is. I got to a point where I was just not happy anymore and I loved teaching while I loved it and let me back up for a second because I have a 25 year old special needs daughter it. And let me back up for a second because I have a 25 year old special needs daughter. She's non nonverbal and when I first had her, I really was having a tough time, was going through I didn't, wasn't in a good relationship with her dad and rough going, especially then after having her end up going through a divorce, and I think I really needed support and I had my family around me, but I needed more than that and I really started looking inward and I was always so interested in energy, work and spirit and I really got attached and like held on to crossing over with John Edward I don't know if you've ever heard of that before, but he's, he's a medium and I was just like all in and started reading more books and things started to uncover for me and I started to listen to my intuition more especially when dealing with Hannah and making decisions for her, because it was she has severe special needs.

Beth Iaciofano:

3:01

And then I went through a divorce. I had to have get a full-time job and I had my. Through a divorce, I had to have get a full time job and I had my degree in biology. I was working as a lab tech before I had her, but I couldn't do that anymore because I had to be home with her. So I listened to my gut, I listened to my, my inner knowing, and I went and got my certification to teach and so I was a science teacher and I loved it. I really did. I was drawn to the school that I ended up working in. I knew that I was meant to be there and I really did love it while I loved it.

Beth Iaciofano:

3:29

But then, you know, 12 years in, 13 years in, it started to get. I was unhappy and I was afraid to leave because I was making decent money and I had the insurance and you know, I was remarried and but I was just, I was. I was getting to the point, but I was just, I was. I was getting to the point where I was miserable. And then COVID happened and everything that is attached to that and the extra stress, and so 15 years, about 14 years in, I decided to. They were starting a new program and I thought, oh, maybe that's what I need. You know, I just need to change, I need to get out of cluster and I just need to change. So I got that job. It was called kitchen science, so I made the curriculum. I was all excited about it and started the job and it wasn't working.

Beth Iaciofano:

4:15

The parts that I loved about teaching I wasn't doing anymore Like the real connecting with kids and helping them with their stress and anxiety and time management, and that's what I loved about teaching.

Beth Iaciofano:

4:26

And I didn't need to do that with this new course because I was only seeing them twice a cycle. So in the meanwhile I was taking this course with two amazing women on energy and I started putting the pieces together of everything that I learned in the past 20 years together of everything that I learned in the past 20 years and it just unfolded beautifully and it brought my mediumship abilities forward and it gave me the confidence to understand that I needed to listen to myself and have the courage to step away, because if I did that, everything would unfold the way it needed to. And it did. It really did. And I found the coaching program after I had the courage to say I can't do this anymore. I'm leaving at the end of the school year. I didn't leave them in January and I found this coaching program and absolutely love it, because I'm helping people unpack the beliefs that aren't serving them anymore. Because I'm helping people unpack the beliefs that aren't serving them anymore and I use it with energy work.

Beth Iaciofano:

5:29

So I'm taking both worlds and my love of teaching and I'm putting them all together in a beautiful symbiotic way. It's really. I really, really love it and I'm just expecting that things are going to unfold for my benefit and they are. And I really work with clients to help them with their mindset and understand the energetic vibration of their thoughts and their emotions and their words and how that impacts their life. So I'm kind of like a case study for my own clients. You know, I use myself as an example of how this work does work. Use myself as an example of how this work does work. So, yeah, everything's, everything's unfolding as it, as it should, and it's it's. It's good. It's hard having your own business, but I really, I really love it and I do. I have other things going on, so money's coming in in other ways and I'm fulfilling that part of myself, the teacher in me. I love teaching college. You know I'm not playing whack-a-mole anymore. You know the kids actually I can actually teach and not have to worry about behaviors and all that.

Karen Sarmento:

6:32

So that's the long answer to that short question, but it's such a powerful answer, such a such a great story. And I hear you using the word unfold, and I love that because it does kind of unfold, just as it's supposed to. You also used the word courage. What would you say to the person that doesn't feel they have the courage to make that change? Because that's a dramatic move that you made, leaving your career to pursue something that is like your passion, but it's scary to make that change.

Beth Iaciofano:

7:03

Yeah, that's a really good point, and I have to say, I have the support of my husband with me and so, yeah, not everyone can do that, but I felt like I didn't have a choice, I couldn't still teach in the way I was and follow this. So I would say to someone who wants to make a change start making small changes and just start making changes in your mindset. What do you want to create? It's interesting too, karen, because this past year and a half all the mindset work has really solidified where it wasn't before. So I understood that I needed to listen to my body, but I didn't understand how much of a creator we actually are. So I think for the person who's sitting there and saying, oh, I need a change, I don't know where to start. Start by listening to your body. Our body knows first. Our brain talks us out of it every time.

Beth Iaciofano:

7:57

So if something doesn't feel right, you have to figure out why it's not feeling right. What's out of alignment, where's the missing piece? And it may be okay. This is going on. I don't really like my job right now, but I don't feel like I could step away. So acknowledge it and feel the emotions, but then also think to yourself all right, what do I want to create, how would I rather feel? And focus on that. Focus on how you'd rather feel and thoughts that get you there. Because what that does is when you are stressed and you're working in a job that you don't like. It brings in fear, anger, frustration, anxiety. Those emotions are all very low, vibrating in our body and if we stay stuck in those emotions it does damage to our body. We get headaches, we get stomach aches, we get illnesses. We have issues that manifest in our body, get headaches, we get stomach aches, we get illnesses. We have issues that manifest in our body. So it's okay to dip down in those emotions, but to get out of them. So I always remind my clients okay, you can feel what you need to feel, but then get out of that and say, okay, what do I want to create? How would I rather feel? And if you don't know what you want to create, you certainly know what you want to feel, because the beauty is in the contrast. So if you're doing work that you don't like and that doesn't feel good, the opposite is what you're looking for.

Beth Iaciofano:

9:12

So focus on that. Get your mindset into a place where you can really think about how you'd rather feel and I promise you you're not digging your head in the sand. That's what a lot of us are programmed as we're kids. Oh, you got to face your problems. Well, facing your problems. If you focus on them, it's like giving them a huge hug and you're keeping them with you and you don't want to do that. So you can acknowledge you have the problem, because we create our own problems by our mindset. But don't focus on it because you're focusing all your energy where you don't want it.

Beth Iaciofano:

9:45

So, focus energy. Make a list. What do you want to create? What do you want for your life? I want to be happy. Maybe I want to live by a lake. I want to. I want to be joyful, whatever it is. Write it down, focus on that and then you're going to see your energetic vibration up levels. It goes higher, which brings in more things to support that higher vibration, which is going to bring in people that you need and signs that you need to see to help you with the problem, to get you out of it.

Beth Iaciofano:

10:15

So focusing on our problems is never the solution. It just keeps us stuck there, and that's what I figured out, as much as I was afraid to jump, I knew that I had to do something because I was just miserable. And we're not here to be that way. We're not here on earth to live like that. Life doesn't have to be that hard. It really it's not meant to be.

Beth Iaciofano:

10:38

We make it hard because we stay in a mindset that doesn't support us, because we think that we should. We stay in a mindset that doesn't support us because we think that we should. We think, oh, life should be hard, I should work hard for this money. No, money has a very high energetic vibration. It's in the same level as love. So if you're living in that high vibration, money's going to come. It doesn't need to come only through work. So just start for the person that's out there listening, just start by being aware of how you're feeling and consciously say, ok, I understand, I'm feeling this way. How would I rather feel? That's the first step is just being aware and understanding how much control you do have.

Karen Sarmento:

11:19

That's really powerful that we do have the control to make the change and where we choose to put our energy or where our focus goes. That's the old saying where our focus goes, energy flows.

Beth Iaciofano:

11:32

Absolutely yeah, yeah, cause what you put out you get back. It's a we're magnets. For what? So pay attention to the people that are around you. Who are you hanging out with? Are you hanging out with people that make you uneasy, uncomfortable, that are upsetting you? There's two reasons for that. Either you're drawing them in so you can see your shadows, the dark parts of yourself, or you don't think that you deserve better. So either way, they're teachers, the people that you don't like. They're. They're, you know. They're mirrors, everyone's mirrors for ourselves. So we could see either our dark parts or our light parts, and our dark parts aren't bad. They're just parts that may not support us anymore.

Karen Sarmento:

12:16

Yes, so there's a letting go in that. And what I just heard, too, is interesting, because oftentimes you hear people say and I've probably been guilty of it gosh, the same thing keeps happening, why do I keep? Why does this experience keep happening? Or this person keeps on. And if we could step back and realize or even ask why am I attracting that into my life?

Beth Iaciofano:

12:41

Yeah, what's my mindset?

Karen Sarmento:

12:44

What do I need to see that that keeps coming my way?

Beth Iaciofano:

12:48

Exactly, and I had to do that with my relationships, because you know the relationships I had before my husband. There was a common thread through all of them and it was. It was a thread of me, because I didn't know who I was and what I wanted. So if you don't know who you are and what you want, you're going to attract people that also don't know who they are and what they want and who are more likely to be controlling, because that's a scary feeling and they'll tell you who you are and what you want. So I had to really do an autopsy I called it an autopsy after my divorce and I had to look in the mirror and I had to take responsibility. And that's the thing. We don't take responsibility for the way we're feeling, for the way things unfold in our life, because we think everything's happening to us. It's not. We got to take responsibility. All right, I'm feeling this way.

Beth Iaciofano:

13:39

Someone could tell me the same thing that they tell you. You don't take offense to it, but I do. What does that tell you? Is it about the thing that was said? No, because if it was about the thing that was said, it would have bothered us both. So it's about me and what I need to. You know it triggered me in some way. So and don't get me wrong I mean it's.

Beth Iaciofano:

13:59

It's kind of someone says something mean to you. It's going to hurt your feelings, but it's a matter of unpacking, okay. Why did that hurt my feelings so much? Or why am I bothered by that? What belief do I have that they just crossed? So I really own my own emotions. No one can make me feel a certain way. You hurt me. You made me feel angry. No, you said something and I felt angry as a result. So it's putting the onus in. Some people don't want to do that. You know they want to play that victim. Oh, the world is happening to me and if you stay in that mentality, you're going to bring in more things that support that. You're being victimized. So it's a conscious effort to shift your energy and unfortunately, there isn't there aren't enough people that that are, I don't want to say buying in, but almost like talking about this and and and listening. The people that need to listen to it, aren't? They think it's woo-woo and it's not. It's science, it's physics, so, um, it's. And when you understand it, like when I understand it now, I can't believe I ever didn't understand it and I didn't ever like live by it and I ever, you know, had that victim mentality because it just doesn't support us, it doesn't, it doesn't make sense. This other way just makes so much more sense, which is why I love the work I'm doing, because I'm helping people unpack.

Beth Iaciofano:

15:20

Even like the past five weeks, I've been working this, this event in Sleepy Hollow. You know the legend of Sleepy Hollow. I live an hour from there, so there's this event that you know. It's really a cool thing that people come and I'm doing Oracle card readings and just the people that I've helped with a 45 second reading with two cards is amazing because it's just bringing attention to their energetic vibration. And what are you thinking, what are you feeling, what are you saying and how is that affecting your life and what can you do about it? So, yeah, it's great, this is what's going on, but what can you do about it? How can you just shift in? Just a one minute conversation with someone is enough to just make them aware and it's been really a lot of fun. I'm really enjoying doing it.

Karen Sarmento:

16:07

Oh, I can tell.

Beth Iaciofano:

16:08

I think it's that mediumship part of me.

Karen Sarmento:

16:10

I can tell you're enjoying it and this is your passion. This is your it's your thing.

Karen Sarmento:

16:16

So to the person so I hope everybody's hearing this, because we are the creators of our reality and our results are really a reflection of our thoughts. So to the person that's listening and they're somewhat becoming aware of huh, so maybe I'm creating all this in my life, or this mess, or these situations. When they become aware of that, how, what are some of the things you do in those little moments of time with your clients or when somebody you're doing a reading? What are some ways that a person can begin to shift? When they become aware they can't seem to get out of that negative mindset.

Beth Iaciofano:

16:57

Get help. Number one If, if, if, if you're aware of how you're feeling and you can't get yourself out of it, and sometimes we get in a tailspin and we need tools. It's important to have those tools because it's not just, oh, I'm going to think this way and I don't want anyone to get that. I want everyone to understand that it's not just, it's not just a mindset shift, it's a whole body shift because you can say to yourself oh, of course I want money, I, you know you put out into the universe, I want, I want money, I want money, I want money. But if you, if your body, if you're also telling yourself I don't know when it's going to come, I don't deserve it, I don't know how I'm going to make it, when is it going to come? The energetic vibration is at different wavelength. It's like you're listening to two different radio stations. So it's not going to work. So that work is unpacking, unpacking the beliefs that are getting in the way of you moving forward, and that's work. It's work with a therapist, with a coach, with someone who can ask you questions in a way you've never thought before and help you come up with the answers that you need. I don't tell my clients what to do, never. I just ask them questions to make them think in a way that's different, that helps them understand why they're doing what they're doing, and to unpack it and clear it. And then, once it's unpacked, then okay, when this comes up again because it will. We're human beings. Some of these beliefs are so ingrained. But then you know you have tools of how to handle it. So I'll get triggered by things. I'll have days where I'm like out, of, like off, but I have tools that I will use to help me move through it quicker. I don't sit in anything anymore. I journal Journaling is huge for me because it just helps me process things. Or I'll talk it through in my head Like, okay, this is the way I'm feeling, this is why I'm feeling it. And it sounds exhausting, like, oh my God, you have to go through this process. But literally it takes seconds for me to stop myself. I'm feeling this certain way. Why am I feeling this way? Am I around someone? Is this mine to own or is this someone else's? That I'm feeling? And if it's mine to own, then what am I thinking right now? Why am I thinking that way? Is this supporting me? So there's a process of unpacking and healing and recognizing.

Beth Iaciofano:

19:22

The foundation of my work is about energy and your energetic vibration. That is everything and we manifest through people. So when your energetic vibration is high, which is where we want it to be, we want to be light, we want to be airy. We don't want to be heavy. Think of how guilt feels, or shame, or fear. Those are heavy emotions because the vibration is very slow, slow moving. So we want to be high and things come in to support that emotion, that high vibration, forward motion. It's powerful and you can't deny it. It's like, oh my God, I was just thinking about this and the next day there it is. But your vibrations have to be, you have to believe it. You can't fake it. You know what I mean. Your thoughts need to match your energetic vibration in your body, like every fiber of you.

Beth Iaciofano:

20:24

Yeah, I know it's going to be fine, like when I took this jump care and it was scary. When I jumped. You know, I left my job and I was starting a new business. Where am I going to make the money? All the fears came in, but I, every single time, I stopped myself and I said no, it feels too right to be wrong, and that was a mantra that I'd lived with. It feels too right to be wrong. If it feels this right, it cannot be wrong.

Beth Iaciofano:

20:49

And also I'm going to say to the listeners always think of this If the universe can support you doing something you don't want to do, why can't it support you doing something you do want to do? Why can't it support you doing something you do want to do? So I could find a job anywhere. I could go to a store and work there. It wouldn't make me happy, but I could do it. So if that's available to me, if it's available for me to be miserable in a job, why isn't it available for me to be happy in a job? The answer is it is as it is.

Beth Iaciofano:

21:20

We just tend to see the things that are number one easiest and we don't. We don't take put enough credence in our happiness Like we can do things that make us happy. There is a way to make money doing that. There is a way to be fulfilled. We just have to be open to listening to our spirit, guides, our inner knowing, and pay attention and take action when we see it. So it does. It takes some unpacking that. There's really no quick and easy answer to what you asked. What do they do once they're aware there's steps to it? You need to be given tools and you need to number one want to change, you need to want to be all in to really do this work and once you see it working and you feel it working, there is no going back. I can't even tell you how different I am now than I was even six months ago.

Karen Sarmento:

22:15

This is amazing. Such powerful, powerful information I mean life changing Absolutely Feels too right to be wrong. So the energy piece of it that's so real, Would you say, that you can actually take on and actually you did sort of say this that you can take on the energy of those around us. So, being aware, is this mine or is this someone else's? That's interesting.

Beth Iaciofano:

22:42

Well, you know, I'm sure you've gone into a room and you felt tension Because we give off our energy. So if we're and you can actually play with that, you can consciously pull in your energetic aura and recognize what happens when you walk down a hall, like I did that at school. When I was working in school, I like consciously pulled it in. No one said a word to did that at school. When I was working in school. I like consciously pulled it in. No one said a word to me. It was like I was invisible. But when I made the conscious effort to to expand my energetic field, people were taking no, oh, hi, beth, how's it going, hi, how's it going. So we, we, we noticed someone's energy before anything else. So we've all felt it. We've all gone into a room and said, well, what's going on in here? You can energy shift, right? So, yeah, absolutely.

Beth Iaciofano:

23:31

Or sometimes I'll be sitting and I'm like, why am I getting irritated? And I noticed that my husband's off. It's like, oh, this is his energy that I'm feeling it's not mine. So it's important to recognize. All right, I'm just watching TV, is something happy, and all of a sudden I'm getting irritated, like what is that all about and he's irritated because he's on the phone and he's all his business is something's going wrong. So I'm feeling his energy. So I have to recognize all right, this is not mine to own. Let me give that away.

Beth Iaciofano:

23:59

And that's something too that I work with my clients in, because we take responsibility for stuff that's not ours to take responsibility for and vice versa. So I always ask them when someone doesn't have boundaries good, healthy boundaries and they don't say no and they take on everything, I always ask them to ask themselves is this mine to fix? Because if it's about them, it's theirs to fix. If it's about someone else, it is not yours to fix. Our children's problems, our friends' problems, everybody's problems are not ours to fix.

Beth Iaciofano:

24:35

When I work with clients, their problems are not mine to fix, it's theirs to fix. But I'm going to be a guide from the side and help them. So that's what we need to remember. With our kids and with our, our family and with our friends, we can be there to guide and support, but not fix, because we're taking away their lessons. If we do that and they need those they're here to learn. We're here to learn lessons. Our souls are here to learn lessons to learn. We're here to learn lessons, our souls are here to learn lessons. So is this mind to fix is a really powerful question to ask yourself, and if it's about someone else's journey, it's not yours to fix.

Karen Sarmento:

25:12

Why is it so hard to let go of the wanting to fix, especially when it comes to our children?

Beth Iaciofano:

25:20

It's a belief, it's a limiting belief, I don't know. Then that's you need to go back to childhood. Okay, were you. Where were you in the pecking order of the family? Because fixers are usually in certain parts of the family, or you fix things as a child, maybe your parent. There's parent issues. So it comes from having a belief that you need to. If you care about someone, you will fix something. So it's a limiting belief and I'm going to. I'm going to remind everybody to to pay attention to what you're thinking and what other people are telling you, because if you're thinking something that does not feel good, like I'm not good enough, I need to fix everybody.

Beth Iaciofano:

26:00

That's a heavy load, that's that doesn't feel good, it's a lie, you're lying to yourself. And a belief is nothing more than a thought that we have. It's a story we tell ourselves, and it's formed either from people our parents putting their beliefs on us, or it's formed from an experience that we've had. So you can have dueling beliefs too. You can believe that money is good because you see all the good it does, but you can also have a belief that money is bad because it might corrupt people. So you have two dueling beliefs, right. So you have to recognize that you've got these two sub-personalities that don't agree with each other and it can wreak havoc with you, because part of you is saying, no, money is good, I want money. But that other part of you is saying, oh no, you're going to get corrupted if you have money. So really that's where the thoughts in your body are not in equal frequencies, because there's still a part of you that that belief in there that, oh no, money corrupts.

Beth Iaciofano:

27:02

That's not a good thing, but they're like no, I want to do this and this and this with it, I want to help people with it. Oh no, you're going to get corrupted. So that's part of recognizing where these dueling beliefs are and where they come from. And if you're a fixer, if you're someone who says yes to everything because you don't want anybody to be mad and you want to help people, it's very stressful and it's a heavy load to carry. My husband is like that. He likes to fix things, he likes to help people.

Beth Iaciofano:

27:31

And helping people is great as long as you are helping them from a full cup and not from a cup that's half empty or even less than full, because then you're taking from yourself. So then you have to realize okay, is this about the person or is this about me feeling good? It makes me feel good when I give. So am I really giving because they need it or am I giving because it makes me feel good? It fills a hole in me.

Beth Iaciofano:

27:55

And think about it. If someone is upset and crying, it makes us upset, right, we want them to be happy and we want them to be happy for themselves, but we also want them to be happy because we don't want to feel this way anymore, right, we don't want to see our kids upset because it makes us upset. So if I can fix that and they're not upset anymore, oh okay, it's a relief. I don't need to feel this way anymore, not recognizing that it's okay for them to feel that way, it's okay for them to struggle, it's part of learning. So it's all about it. Really, it's about us. It's about our ego and not wanting to feel bad ourselves. So if we fix it, oh okay, everything's good. I don't need to feel this way anymore.

Karen Sarmento:

28:38

Wow. Yes, your struggle is making me uncomfortable.

Beth Iaciofano:

28:42

Yes, yeah, I mean, granted, you've all. Obviously, yes, we want to help other people, but just recognize where, what I'm getting from it, Cause it's uncomfortable to see we have compassion, right, it's uncomfortable to see people struggle. But I came especially having my daughter with severe special needs. I had to recognize that she's here for a purpose. She's here to learn lessons that struggle. And it's my belief that we come here knowing what our main struggles are going to be and purposefully choose those struggles because we want to learn from them.

Beth Iaciofano:

29:20

So I don't find myself diving into the depths when someone is struggling, because I look at it like, okay, what do you need to learn from this, no matter how horrible it is, what can be learned from it? And so that really helps me step back and I'll send my love and my energy and my light and pray for them. But I don't take on the sadness and those really low vibrating emotions that will harm me. I can't help someone, that's I can't help the whole world, I can't. So the best I could do is send my energy, which is incredibly powerful, to them and help the people that I can help, the ones that I'm meant to help, that come into my life. So I really don't. I have compassion, but it does not run my life. It doesn't keep me curled up in bed because I'm so upset for someone who's going through a hard time or a whole group of people. There's a lot of sadness in the world right now. It could keep us curled up in the corner if we felt and kept that inside and that's not supporting us. So it's important to realize what can you fix? What's yours to fix? And if you can't fix it and you can't physically support someone, send them your energy and always ask yourself they're in this position for a reason. What do they need to learn? What do the people around them need to learn? We're all here to learn lessons.

Beth Iaciofano:

30:54

So for me that was a game changer, especially with Hannah. I could really get scared with her, like what's going to happen and is someone going to hurt her? Because she can't talk and tell me if someone's hurting her. So I had to really release the fear of not knowing or not being able to control, and control really is about fear. Anger is about fear. It's just the outward expression of that emotion that some of us are not comfortable showing. So think about that too. You know. You see someone who's really angry. It's really because they're fearful, but they don't want to show the fear because they think that's weak. It's a weakness if you show fear, but if you show anger, oh that's. I'm angry, I'm tough. So anger is the outward expression of all other emotions. So right underneath there is fear.

Karen Sarmento:

31:42

It's so interesting and I know for me sometimes when somebody's sad or somebody's going through something difficult, a part of me will feel guilty for moving on. And even if I recognized it's not mine to fix, there's a part of me that would feel bad. Having a fantastic day because else is going. Somebody close to me is going through something. I should be sad too.

Beth Iaciofano:

32:07

Yeah. And then you got to ask yourself is this supporting me right now? Is this good for? Is this what my soul needs? Do I need to stay down with this person? Or can I give my love and light and my high vibration energy to this person to help? So think of it that way. And then, with the guilt thing, just ask yourself well, where's that coming from? Number one, because usually guilt is about well, I should be in the word should. It needs to be taken out of our language because that implies guilt. Right there I should be is right there Guilt. I'm not doing something I'm supposed to do. If you use the word should, right. So why should you be? Why? Why should I stay down with this person? I've already supported and I've given what I can. Now it's up to them to go through their process. Whatever they need to go through. I have my own stuff that I'm going through. So, excuse me, I think recognizing that is important.

Beth Iaciofano:

33:03

And what's the belief? Because if you're feeling guilty, it's because you've crossed a line. You feel like you've crossed the line for one of your beliefs. A good friend doesn't leave their friend upset. That's a belief, okay. So okay, a good friend doesn't leave their friend upset unless then find the exception to that belief, because we can always find an exception. We know that. You know most of us will agree that murder is not OK. We can have a belief that murder is not OK. Well, murder is not OK unless, unless I'm going to be killed or my family is going to be killed. Is it OK then? So it's called justifiable homicide.

Beth Iaciofano:

33:45

So, with a belief that brings up guilt, find the exception and that's going to be the way to take yourself out of that guilt, because you're saying, no, okay, this is the reason why it's okay. For me it's kind of like giving yourself permission to step away from that friend that's going through a hard time. Well, no, it could be. A good friend stays with a friend when they're down, unless it's pulling me under with it, and then both of us are under. So it's like, are we both going to sink, or is there one of us that's going to be vibrating high to help the other one out? Going to be vibrating high to help the other one out? So think of that as well.

Beth Iaciofano:

34:24

You know there's so much to it. There's so much to the stuff that we bring from childhood, from past lives, from generational wounds. I mean there's new understanding of the impact, the genetic impact, of what a mother goes through and how that's handed down to a daughter through her eggs. So when we're feeling stressed, that affects every cell in our body and then we get pregnant and pass that on genetically. So there's so much more research now to the detrimental effects of trauma and stress and how that affects generations. So generational trauma is a real thing. It's not a woo-woo thing. It's a real thing and there's so much to it and it's all the foundation and energy and understanding that it's unbelievable all this that you're sharing today and there is a science behind this.

Karen Sarmento:

35:23

It is science. It's not woo-woo as it was once thought to be, or some people still think it is, but it isn't. And when you think of intuition and you mentioned messages from your spirit guides, and what does that look like to you? Because I think sometimes it can be confusing for people when they feel like they're listening to their intuition to not do something. Also, sometimes that can be like fear holding you back, not necessarily your intuition. So how do you differentiate intuition and what is a limiting belief, just holding you back?

Beth Iaciofano:

36:03

Yeah, that's a really, really good question and I actually just had to come face to face with that Intuition. It takes practice. You have to learn to be quiet and listen to your body and you don't even really need a relationship with your guides, because when I started tuning in I didn't really have a full understanding of my guides. I knew I had them but there was no relationship. So I'm not like there is now with my mediumship. But it's just a listening to your gut, it's a does this feel right? We all know when we've been scared, like oh, I shouldn't go through that door, Something feels odd. So we know that feeling, get used to knowing that. The difference between needing to lean in and knowing it's wrong is again asking yourself. Let me use myself as an example. I started this job as an executive function coach through an online business and because I wanted to still have my hand in teaching and coaching in a different way. So I'm going through the process and it's more detailed than I ever thought it was going to be, like the modules you need to do, and I mean I taught for 17 years. I didn't know I'd need to go through this process. There's a whole computer program with it and I was feeling very frustrated and overwhelmed, and I had to recognize in myself that I'm the kind of person who I don't appreciate a learning curve. I expect a lot from myself, too much. I expect myself to know everything before I start a job, which is unrealistic, but it was I had. That was something I was being faced with. And I was a job which is unrealistic, but it was I had. That was something I was being faced with and I was asking myself all right, going through all this, is this really still feeling right, or is this just frustration and anger and fear and emotions I have to lean into and then get to the other side. So what I did is I sat and I thought, okay, is this something I really want to do? I thought about the not the end game. But after the frustration part, I thought, okay, let me imagine myself there. Am I going to be happy? And the answer was yes, because I want to work with people in this way. So that was my answer. Okay, then I just need to take a deep breath, calm down and go step by step instead of trying to jump and expecting too much of myself. So once I did that, it was just a check-in, like, okay, and so if I had said, all right, after all this, can I still see myself working with people, I would have checked in with my body again and it would have been like, oh, I don't know, it doesn't really feel like it used to. So then that's an opportunity. Well, maybe this isn't right for me, maybe I thought it was, but it's not so. That's how you figure out.

Beth Iaciofano:

38:49

Is this just fear? So is is the end? Is the fear sitting in the way of what you want? If it's sitting in the way of what you want, what you want to create, where you want to get, then you need to lean into it. If you're fearful because you don't and what you want, what you think you want, you really don't want someone's telling you you want it or someone's pressuring you to do it. That's different.

Beth Iaciofano:

39:17

So it really comes down to listening to yourself. Is this something and I've always done that with my jobs Like I will go in for an interview and I'll think, all right, let me get the vibe of the room. Is this someplace I could see myself working? And I just trust myself. I trust my body. My body will always tell me when something is either right or wrong. That's my guides talking to me. They are always, always talking to us and helping us. We just don't always listen.

Beth Iaciofano:

39:50

So, in your inner knowing, your soul knows where it needs to go. So if you're feeling disrupted, it's because you're out of alignment with your higher self. So you need to figure out okay, is this just a learning process and I just need to lean in and relax and take a deep breath? Okay, yeah, that is it, or no? This is really not something that I should be doing. Or I'm not learning the lesson, I'm doing it again. You said before why do I keep doing this? You keep doing it because you're not learning the lesson. Either someone's taking the lesson from you, or you're refusing to see part of yourself that needs to heal, or you're not seeing your like the common denominator piece. Like, all right, all these people are saying this what's the common denominator? Well, I am Okay. A lot of people don't want to see that they're the common denominator in any situation. Well, if it keeps happening to you, what's the common denominator? You? So that's what needs to be adjusted, not everyone else. Oh, this person in this situation and it's oh. I met the same person in that situation and I met the same one over here. Oh my God, what's going on? Well, you're the problem. You're the problem.

Beth Iaciofano:

40:59

So it's really about listening, karen. It really is. It's about getting quiet and listening to your intuition. I can't say any any stronger or any. It's so clear and and necessary to just listen and take action. When you need to take action and ask for help, your guides are there, but they're not going to do things for you. They're guides, so you want help, you need to ask for it and you'll get it. You'll see signs. You just need to recognize them and take action.

Karen Sarmento:

41:31

I love that. Yeah, recognize them, but act upon it too If it feels right. Yeah.

Beth Iaciofano:

41:38

Yeah, like you'll meet someone, someone will come into your life. I mean, the number of people that I've met through my podcast and the podcast has kind of fallen a little bit by the wayside because there's so much else going on, but it was so important in the time I started it because I needed to make, I felt like I needed to make connections and I was connecting with amazing people through that podcast like just really cool human beings that were just energetically aligned with me and it was really important. I felt like that was given to me, like that was presented to me, like this is an idea, the ideas that we have, what we want to create. Those are all given. They're all inspiration is given. It's just. It's a great. It's a really cool relationship between energy and me. You know, like relying on the energies around me that are here to support me and then me taking action. And it's my choice.

Beth Iaciofano:

42:33

We all have free will. We can stay in those emotions that don't feel good. We could do it for our whole life and we all know people that have, and maybe that's just their path in this, in this lifetime. Maybe they're they decided. All right, I'm not going to learn a whole lot. I need to know how it feels to maybe sit in this emotion. We don't know, we can't judge, we don't know what anyone's path is, but you have a choice you can sit in it or you can get out of it. I chose to get out of it so good, so, so good.

Karen Sarmento:

43:04

so we have all the answers within us if we just listen to that bingo and the exchange. When you talked about your podcast, the hats we wear that was an idea, but with that came connections and opportunities that it brought through that pipeline as well. Absolutely so, so much amazing information you have shared with us today. I'm so, so thankful and it's it's really fascinating. How can people find you and how could people work with you?

Beth Iaciofano:

43:37

I have a website rise up to transformcom. That has everything there. It's a one-stop shopping. It's got my podcast. It has a link for coaching, if anybody wants coaching. It has a link for mediumship. I do group readings, I do individual readings via zoom or in person that you can find me there and my email is also listed on my website, so everything is really there.

Karen Sarmento:

44:01

Excellent, and all that information will be in the show notes as well. And then your podcast, the hats we wear is so. It's so fun. It's such a fun podcast and so much great information. Oh gosh, any parting words, beth, that you want to share with the audience, that you'd like to leave everybody with.

Beth Iaciofano:

44:20

I think just again just listen to your. Your body knows first, your brain talks you out of it. So listen to your body. If you need to rest, rest you need to take action, take action. But that's the first thing. Awareness, aware, being aware of how your thoughts, emotions and words are affecting you is the first step to transformation.

Karen Sarmento:

44:41

Beautiful Thank you. Thank you so so much for being here today.

Beth Iaciofano:

44:46

Thank you for having me. I've had a good time.

Karen Sarmento:

44:48

And thank you everybody for joining us for another episode of we Are Meant For More more. Remember, whatever challenges you're facing or have faced in the past, they don't define you. You are worthy, capable and destined for greatness. Let's embrace the whispers of possibility together, because together we rise and we are meant for more.

This was a 6-2 Studio production. Find us at six-two.studio for all your creative sound needs.