Creative & Sparkly AF: Turning Life Into Story | with Guest, Storyteller Stephanie Rogers (PT2)

PART 2: The Plot Twist That Changes Everything

Stephanie Rogers is a Chicago-based storyteller, writer, and educator, and the founder of Story Jam, a storytelling and live music show that brings true personal stories to life. Through her classes and workshops, she helps people shape their experiences into stories that connect, resonate, and actually land.

The conversation with storyteller and creative force Stephanie Rogers continues, and this is where it gets real. She opens up about moving through a cancer journey and how it woke her up and deepened her love for life, art, and people.

Suzanne and Stephanie talk about the boldness it takes to keep choosing a creative life, how moments that feel like everything is falling apart are often the ones quietly opening something new, and that creativity gremlin, perfectionism. That voice that wants everything to be flawless before you move, and keeping it moving anyway, because these queens are bold, babe.

To learn more about Stepahanie's work and Story Jam, go to: storyjamshow.com

Thank you for listening! Learn more at suzannsole.com

Check out Suzanne's spiritual and sassy t-shirts at personallyspiritual.com

Transcript

SPEAKER_02 0:00

There's a thin veil between the creative flow and and us here in Earth on Earth. And so this the sort of opening, the opening of the spigot is sort of always accessible.

SPEAKER_00 0:13

You're listening to the Spiritual Shit Show Podcast with Suzanne Sol, episode 74. Hey you delicious stunners, and welcome to the Spiritual Shit Show Podcast, where we get into the carnival ride. The healing and spiritual awakening journey can be. I'm your host, Suzanne Sol, comedian, lifelong spiritual student, and I'm sharing some of the helpful hints I've learned along my journey that have helped me, and that I hope help you too. Welcome back for part two of my conversation with Stephanie Rogers, storyteller, educator, creative powerhouse, and the founder of Story Jam. Chicago's storytelling meets live music show that feels like a TED Talk wandered into a rock concert and makes everyone cry, laugh, and want to tell more stories. In this episode, Stephanie shares her journey with her cancer diagnosis, how it changed the trajectory of her life, woke her up to her purpose, and caused her to feel a deepened love and appreciation for her life, for art, and for people. And why being bold may be the only way forward. So let's jump in, Stephanie. Welcome to Duality. The world of dual dualism. You know, I do though, I do. Like I definitely am a person, like I think I'm an empath, so I get overstimulated. Yeah. So I do definitely like have a lot of time by myself because I need it. Yeah. So I do, but the shyness, I think that like I'm a little bit shy, but that's more about relational things. Oh. So, but I totally appreciate what you're saying because I a hundred percent understand that. Where it's like, I want to get out there, I want to do this stuff, but you know, then I also need like quiet time too. So totally, totally is like you as a balance to strike.

SPEAKER_02 2:09

Yes, absolutely. I mean, maybe we're all maybe, you know, maybe all performers have that thing where we need to regenerate because we do give a lot of energy out into the world.

SPEAKER_00 2:17

It really, yes. Yes, yeah. So then you get this diagnosis. Now, did you have some symptoms that were Yes? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 2:25

And I went to every voodoo doctor I could find in Los Angeles because, of course, I was already on that kind of uh that path of consciousness and and I but I didn't know the path was so circuitous, it was like, uh, I didn't I didn't have a path. I just had I knew that I really didn't want to do a conventional, take this in a conventional way. I was extremely tired. Right. I was really struggling. I would by one o'clock in the afternoon, I would feel like I was hit by a Mac truck. Oh you know, and so I had to solve it. I didn't know what was wrong, but cancer never entered my mind. Yeah, but I did also have a bump on my neck. Okay, and I went to a I got in insurance from a really I I had a day gig. So all of course the commercial money ran out because I was buying everybody drinks at the bar and like I just need friends.

SPEAKER_00 3:16

I'll pay I'll buy you a drink so you'll be my friend. Please be my friend. Listen, we've all been there.

SPEAKER_02 3:22

We've all been there. We've all been there. And I, you know, I I I I I did I overspent. I didn't I didn't say, I mean, being again not good with not great with numbers. So I I ran out of money. So I took a temp job, which turned into a permanent job at this um this stock brokerage firm.

SPEAKER_01 3:39

Oh, okay.

SPEAKER_02 3:40

And I got to I got really great insurance. I had lost my SAG insurance, of course. And I so I went to uh and I'm by SAG I mean Screen Actors Guild.

SPEAKER_00 3:50

Screen Actors Guild, now SAG AFTRA.

SPEAKER_02 3:53

And uh I went to this cool doctor, Dr. Resnick in in uh Beverly Hills, and he said, Darling, you are 26 years old and you have a big bump on your neck. You've been to every, you know, chakra healer in Los Angeles. Go and get it taken out. Like all the tests had been negative, so they didn't see anything. But I went home and did what he said because he was so amazing. And it it turns out that it the tumor I had was butting up against the recurrent laryngeal nerve, which is a serious nerve, and it was butting up against a um a vein. So, like a little bit more, and it would have penetrated that and it would have been very bad. So I was really lucky. And that was another thing. The night before I got the cancer removed, I had a dream uh that I you know you know dream how we think about dreams, we creatives, uh, you know, I'm on the edge of a cliff and I fly off, and then my another person I was with just falls down into the water, and I saw that as symbolic. I'm just releasing something and I'm soaring, soaring into something. So I got really lucky with uh my with my cancer journey. It did change the my life completely. Yes, you know.

SPEAKER_00 5:13

So So how do you think that you looked at things differently after the experience of moving through the cancer experience?

SPEAKER_02 5:25

Um I think I got a little more grounded, in fact, uh, you know, just appreciation for for everybody I everything I had. And it that appreciation has deepened as I get older. And, you know, the realizing the privilege that that I'm gifted with, you know, the privilege of this life and the many blessings it it and it entails. But I just think that, you know, I really make an effort to be with the friends I'm with when I'm with them. And I think it was more like, well, I've got the next thing to get to and the next thing to get to. And I can certainly fall into that. Sure. But um, you know, m people are more important to me than things, and people are more important to me. The people I love are more important to me than the pursuit of something so ephemeral, you know, so elusive as, you know, whatever it is that the my ego, there was a little bit of an ego death.

SPEAKER_00 6:27

Of course, yeah, yeah, yeah, for sure, for sure. And is have you had any recurrences or no?

SPEAKER_02 6:37

I have had other health things. Okay. Like when I was leading, I used to lead an event band. So you you know, you and I have been in event music. That's right. Private events, private events in Chicago, America. Singing and singing and singing. And I used to sing for these these event band leaders. And one day I was like, like we would show up, you know, you show up in your long, gorgeous gown and and you're singing your so you're singing Fly Me to the Moon, and you're singing whatever the current pop hits, and everybody's happy and dancing. And I used to look at the around at the band and I'd be like, God, I could lead a band like this. I'm sure I could I can do this. Oh my god. And I looked up a couple YouTube videos and I read a book, and I was like, I'm a band leader now, everybody.

SPEAKER_00 7:18

I love it.

SPEAKER_02 7:19

Just so you know, I'm a band leader. Oh my god. And I didn't know shit about being a band leader. I didn't know how to I didn't know how to I didn't know how to chart. I mean, I took a little bit of piano one time, and I've taken voices, but not real music theory and not really like how to conduct a band or something. Um an orchestra. Yeah. So I I started my own orchestra, and and I was like, that just gave me a lot of confidence. You know, that's the cancer again. It was like, I have nothing to lose. I have no ego. Like I I don't care if this fails. I have nothing.

SPEAKER_00 7:47

I've I So how did you figure out how to like write charts and everything?

SPEAKER_02 7:51

Oh, that's where you hire people. Oh, perfect.

SPEAKER_00 7:54

I mean, I'm just gonna do this part.

SPEAKER_02 7:55

Okay. No, I I did, I did, um, I did learn the basics in writing charts. I I, of course, I learned how to read charts and write charts and stuff. Yeah, but I um I I had two benevolent mentors who gave me a lot of charts. I bought other charts from bands and I I amalgamated like a whole bunch of like 800 songs that just came together somehow. And if I needed a song charted, a real chart, I would definitely find someone who could do it.

SPEAKER_00 8:28

Yes, yes, right? Yeah, yeah. I mean, that's extraordinary.

SPEAKER_02 8:31

Yeah, seriously, it takes a long time to that's a like that's a whole that's a whole skill that you need you need.

SPEAKER_00 8:38

Yes, but I'm just saying, like, as far as you looking around and being like, I could do this, yeah, and then doing it. I know, incredible, the audacity. I love the audacity. I'm an audacious person. Yes. Now, did you call the Stephanie Rogers band? I sure did.

SPEAKER_02 8:54

Of course I did. I was going to at first, I was like, I'll call it like voodoo hippies. And I'm like, no, that won't, that won't work. I need a band. And everybody uses their name, but you know, I didn't want to, I didn't want to be some something like, you know, Jell-O or you know, like you're not it's not, it's not me.

SPEAKER_00 9:13

I love it. And plus, you know, you you're like an at walking advertisement for your band.

SPEAKER_02 9:19

Well, if they if they uh see us and they like us, they could they'll find us somehow, I guess. But then that band ran for 15 years. I was a band leader for a good 15 years. Wow. Yeah, I faked my way through that very well for a long time. That's incredible.

SPEAKER_00 9:33

It was really fun, and I don't know many female band leaders, by the way.

SPEAKER_02 9:37

Well, Sarah Marion is Sarah Marion is one of the things. Yes, there are some. There are a few, there are a few. There are a few now, but then yeah, there weren't a lot. I don't think there were a lot. So, but then I got, unfortunately, I was on a gig. We had a new sound team, big speakers, big monitors facing us, bringing the sound back to us, and I got blasted in the ears, and I got debilitating tinnitus. Oh no, and a lot of band leaders have it, but not not everyone can deal with it, and I could not deal with it. So it was absolutely overwhelming. Um, so I had to finish out the year with the gigs I had. I hired other people to help run the run them because any little bit of sound was I also got hyperacous uh hyperacusis, which is when your ears hurt when you hear noise.

SPEAKER_00 10:27

Oh my goodness gracious.

SPEAKER_02 10:29

So it was pretty, that was crapola. So that was another signal to, okay, you're not doing that anymore, girl. So I went to the I went to the event band. We had been working great very steadily, they were making great money. It was really fun. And I went to the guys and I'm like, guys, we're not gonna be doing event music anymore. And now we're gonna be doing shows in small little theaters, and it's gonna be called Story Jam, and you're gonna make about a third of what you made before. Let's have some fun. And then you're welcome. That's right. And they were all just like, what the actual and and I just had to sort of talk to everybody individually and say, We're we're pivoting, we're doing something different now. And that's how I started Story Jam, actually. I had been already, I was already interested in storytelling and and people's unique stories. Um, and I had studied a little bit of nonfiction performance at Northwestern. I love the idea that you can perform something that's true and make it theatrical a little bit. Um, and so I combined my love for that. I was taking a class in solo show just for fun with Arlene Malinowski, my mentor. And I sort of was having this ear problem. So it all kind of converged. And um, I came up with Story Jam. And the reason actually I came up with the stories is let's do let's keep the band so we can still rock.

SPEAKER_00 11:51

Sometimes you're like, I gotta keep the band. How do I work them in?

SPEAKER_02 11:57

Can't not rock. We cannot not rock. Can't not rock. So then I was like, well, this will be perfect because when someone tells a story, it's kind of quiet. So my ears will have a little ear break, and then we'll rock for a sec, and then we'll get the hell out of there and it'll be quiet again. So my ears loved story jam. And that was that was how are your ears now? Do you still they're still pretty tricky, but um you habituate to tinnitus actually. You start to habituate. It took two years. Okay, it took two years of absolute agony. It wasn't fun, it wasn't pretty. I just wondered many times how how could I possibly live with this? Because it's just over my it would wake me up in the middle of the night and it's the ringing in the ears. It's really loud ringing, it's very loud, and the two two different ears were on two different levels. So this was 9,000 Hz and this was 8,000 Hertz. So that's two different noises you're hearing. In a dissonance, in a dissonance at the same time. Yeah, so that that has that was really rough. But actually, what helped me a lot there was Reiki. Oh, yeah. So I have a dear friend who does Reiki, and I went to her three times a week, probably, and I did everything I could, and I just had a lot of talks and a lot of angel cards and a lot of everything to get through it. And now uh it's still there, but it's very, very much it's much quieter. Oh, thank God, and it's not as bothersome because you habituate to it. Thank God. I mean, that is sounds really challenging, especially for a musician. Thank you. I know, but but if you look around, a lot of musicians um in our w world have oh yeah, have it. Yeah, I mean, they've been exposed to so many and I was in rock bands like from the age of 18, so all that exposure and we didn't wear earplugs, right?

SPEAKER_00 13:40

Right? Yes, yeah, and sometimes the monitors are like a nightmare. So I have heard you say a couple of times, I would love for you to kind of talk about this a little bit, how you what the things that uh you experienced were felt like they were nudging you to your next, like you're done with with this thing that you're doing. And so kind of like, how did you come to be in that philosophy?

SPEAKER_02 14:06

Oh I I've only recently come to buy it. I've heard it a lot before, and I've noticed it in my life that gee, I wanted to be a movie star, that didn't work out. Gee, I wanted to be an event band leader for the rest of my life, that didn't work out. And those little things, those are two of many examples, but um, those little things, noticing that just life puts a bl a blockade in front of you, and you you gotta work around it, you've gotta pivot, you've got to turn the other way and go down another road. I've noticed that. But now that I'm discovering that it's actually been my life path, and it's probably everybody's life path is like, okay, you know, uh you you're walking this way, you're you're on this linear progression. I'm gonna do this, I'm gonna get my degree, and I'm gonna but but that maybe doesn't it doesn't go that way.

SPEAKER_00 14:59

And so like um just based on what your view or your perspective is, what do you think the difference is between someone who's like going through challenges or struggles, like pursuing something that is in their heart or in their goals, and knowing, hey, this is redirecting me.

SPEAKER_02 15:20

Yes. I I think that our biggest challenges are our biggest gifts. My having um, you know, complete desperation in Los Angeles, not knowing where I was gonna get food to eat or how I was gonna pay for rent or anything, uh, that sucked, but it also was this great gift. Cancer was a great gift, and all of these challenges along the way are our greatest gift. So I think that um, well, for me, when I have a challenge now of any kind, any life challenge, I look at it a little differently. It's not as daunting. It's sort of like, okay, thank you, little gift. You suck, but we're gonna, you know, I it's almost laughable, it's almost funny. Yeah. Sometimes what happened to me just yesterday, actually, and I was like, Oh, you're funny, you're fun, you guys are funny. Whoever got this, this is a good one, good one. You know, it's like, I mean, um, being married to a normie, for example, who has no interest. Like, I was like, honey, we're gonna watch Bashar. Check this stuff out, it's amazing. And he's like, Wow, you're really crazy. So it's like, oh, you guys are funny. You're funny. That's funny. Oh, that's a good one.

SPEAKER_00 16:36

Good one, you know, like yeah, but do you think it's more like a feeling of like that is I feel like what's occurring in my life is a message to me to be to to redirect. Yes. As opposed to this is a challenge I'm experiencing while I'm working on this thing that I'm working on, and that's a challenge. To but don't redirect on that.

SPEAKER_02 16:57

Well, sometimes it's a redirect, and sometimes it's a okay, you can get through this and break down that wall, girl. Yeah, you got this. Like, but it but that is all to me driven by the what is in the heart and the desire. Like, if the desire is I've got to break this wall down right now, if that's what's that that's what it is, then I'm going. And if it's like, mm, that doesn't feel right at all, and I know by now I'm in my late 50s. I'm all I'm well aware right now, I think, most of the time, maybe not all the time, but you know, that what is actually meant to be a challenge to overcome and what is meant to be uh a a diversion.

SPEAKER_00 17:35

Yeah. So basically what I'm hearing is like you feel it. Yeah. When the thing is happening, you're like, this is a challenge. I gotta keep going forward. Or you know, I've I've I've gotten the message, it's time to redirect. Yes. I think that's so important. And it's challenging sometimes to know the difference. I think, you know, if you're really struggling in something and you're like, but but I hear what you're saying, and it's kind of inspiring to know that to think of the idea of let me feel into myself and see how I'm seeing the situation. Is this a you got this, keep going, or is this uh hey, right?

SPEAKER_02 18:15

Time to let go, time to let go. Yeah, exactly. I I mean that that seems like something really helpful to sort of realize. Yeah. And you know, when you're 20 and you're just barreling through and you're like, I'm just ah, I'm bombing through this, I'm gonna go. You you don't have the time, but maybe people who meditate, and I try to be a meditator.

SPEAKER_00 18:37

Are you a meditator? I am a meditator daily. Oh, you're a medes every morning. But but you know, sometimes my meditation turns into, oh, let me remind myself to do this. Put get my phone, put it something into my reminder. Okay, let me go back to my meditation. Oh, wait, there's another thing I gotta remember to do today. Like, you know, sometimes it's like that. Sometimes it's like that. It's not always perfect.

SPEAKER_02 18:58

But I heard some Buddhist monk on TV on a podcast recently say that, well, you should embrace those those moments where you're thinking what I should what you should do. Yeah, because that's like what you're working against. And you always need the duality. You always need something to work against to get better. And maybe next time you go further and you bump up again, and then you go further, and you come back and you go. So that's true. But my meditation practice is always like, I I do have, I was, I won't call it a meditation practice. That's good, that's a little ambitious, but I would say do try to meditate and and check in. Um, and and that that find the guidance, find that guidance. And most of the time, I'm just so used to just being such a floater and and so ethereal already and not really logical that I it's already on all the time. In fact, when like if I'm writing a song for Story Jam, uh I know or doing anything creative, I just turn on a spigot. It's like shh uh open open the spigot because it's always there. I'm really, I really kind of feel like there's a it's it's there's a thin veil between the creative flow and and us here. Beautiful in earth, on earth. And so this the sort of opening, the opening of of the spigot is sort of always accessible. And and I I imagine that's that is accessible for anybody at any given time. But maybe we're mired in our own stuff, but in our own logic, and and I shouldn't do this, and I should, I can't, I won't, I shouldn't. I I don't want to have those those blockades. I don't want to have that in the way. But I know that if I have to write a song, like for example, if you and I were sitting here and you're like, let's write a song, Steph, I I would, I would just open it up and we would, you know, I know and you would too, because you're you're right there with me in the in this kooky.

SPEAKER_00 20:48

Like, okay, tell us we're ready for the download.

SPEAKER_02 20:52

But it's like maybe it's like kind of being in the middle of the third dimension and the fourth dimension or something, or in the middle of the fifth and third, like we're we're traversing these multi-dimensions somehow with this in in the creative flow. And I I love that. I love the idea that like I need I know it's there, it's waiting, it's all waiting. And am I gonna what am I turning on? Am I gonna write a story or am I gonna write a song or am I gonna go practice piano or something? It's it's really channeling, it's like constant channeling. Yes, your podcast is constant, you're channeling questions, yes, yes, and comments.

SPEAKER_00 21:28

Yeah, yeah, yeah, definitely. I definitely get like it does feel like it's a downloading like um whilst I'm doing it, and also like when I'm editing, I also get lead on how to edit. And I I yes, and writing if I do a solo episode, working on those. Your writing is amazing. You're writing Oh my gosh, thank you so much.

SPEAKER_02 21:52

You know, and honestly, your singing is amazing. When I first saw you sing, I was like, Who is this creature? You were magical. I know. I don't know.

SPEAKER_00 22:02

You are an amazing singer and I'm an amazing talent. So I that's why I wanted to get in touch with you because I was like, she's so cool and talented. I'm talented too. Let me go. And and and what you're doing is just so I don't know. You what I I think something that I've caught from you, even though like we only like met each other, we can't figure out where, but we remember we somewhere. That's how, yeah. And but I see your work on the Facebook and on the socials, and I just love your boldness. Oh, thanks.

SPEAKER_02 22:33

Absolutely love it. It's it's it's funny because it is totally devoid of logic. It's like it's it's in the same, it's in the same family as like let's turn open the spigot. It's just like I've nothing to lose. I don't care. I don't care. I I will suck at things sometimes. I'm not gonna be happy with every show. I'm not gonna be happy with every performance, with every note I hit. And and I don't, it doesn't stop me. I think it can stop us sometimes, that stuff, right?

SPEAKER_00 23:00

Uh yes. That's something I really work with perfectionism and and being afraid to make a mistake was a really, really big hurdle for me.

SPEAKER_01 23:10

Wow.

SPEAKER_00 23:11

Yeah. I faked it that I didn't. Yeah. But but in the preparation, in the preparing, there was that's from Godspell. Oh, yes. And um getting ready and what am I gonna do and how am I gonna do it and practicing and stuff, I would really have to work through a lot of um perfectionism.

SPEAKER_02 23:32

Well, you're putting yourself out there. I mean, you know, it's like we do the work, we work our asses off. But but um, you know, I I'm not gonna let my desire for perfection, which definitely exists, and I definitely have some, probably have a little bit of maybe OCD or maybe something that you know is undiagnosed.

SPEAKER_00 23:51

Yes, yes, yes. We're all undiagnosed somewhere.

SPEAKER_02 23:56

My psychologist friend Alina says that we're all on the spectrum of everything. Yes. We're all a little bit you know, a little a bit on the you know, yeah, autism spectrum. We're all a little bit on this, this, this. But but um, but that those of us who just have this drive, this inner drive to keep doing this stuff, we can't help but listen to that urge, right?

SPEAKER_00 24:17

Yes, yes. And so, like, how do you get through that? Like when you would say, like, I know everything's, you know, every show's not gonna be perfect, and every song's what what do you how do you what do you say to yourself? How do you be present with yourself to just say, well, I'm not gonna let the embarrassment of what I'm worried about uh it not being perfect or whatever that is, um, how am I gonna just go forward anywhere? How what do you how do you rationalize like to yourself, like it's okay? Like how do you speak to yourself?

SPEAKER_02 24:49

Well, first of all, I think it starts with a lot of prep, right? So I know oh I learned last time that I didn't bring my curling iron, so I better curl my fricking hair next time or or whatever. I wasn't gonna say anything.

SPEAKER_00 25:07

But I noticed how straight your hair was. Thank you for noticing a thing.

SPEAKER_02 25:11

My my hair is straight, but I am not. No, I'm I'm married to a man, but she's married to a man. I'm married to a man, but we're all a little on the spectrum. We're all a little on the Kinsey scale, all various stages. But uh the but you learn from the last time and the last time and the last time what happened that, you know, I guess if you really want to I hate it. I hate that part of it. I hate going back and looking back and seeing the videos and saying, oh shit, you know, we I talked too much in this section. Right, right, right. So every single time gets better and better and better. Story jams, we've been at it for 11 years. I know that I can't talk too much now. I know that I've just got to shut up and get the show moving. Okay, that's a bit a little bit of a challenge in the past. And I know that we have to know our songs like nobody's business. Sarah Marie Young, again, we bring her up. She taught me not too long ago that you it's better to memorize your memorize your lyrics. Yes, you connect more with the audience.

SPEAKER_01 26:07

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 26:07

So that's something we jobbers, you know, when you're singing 40 songs a night or 50 songs, you're like, I don't know the words to I will survive. I must have them in front of me. Of course, you and I both know the words to I will survive. Right. Bad example. But I need the words because just in case. It's a crutch. It's it is a crutch. It's a crutch, but we do know it. But you know, that's that these things that these are the little details of a show that you're prepping. And so every time I go on stage and every time I think all the shit that could go wrong, I just have to say, I've hired the amazing people. Yes, I've done my work, I prepared this, I know what's happening. I have my ducks are in a row, hopefully, pretty pretty much for the most part. Yeah. There could be a technical problem. There could be anything. Let's let's roll with it. There was one time where our sound went out. We sang a cappella on stage. There was one time when someone hijacked my show and got I did an open mic portion where I was like, hey, audience, let's do an open mic. That was a bad idea, but I've done it since, actually. Yeah. Where I did five 10 minutes of open mic, and I said, You have one minute to tell a story, give us a conflict and a resolution, and and make it true and make it real. First person, go. And some guy hijacked the stor the show and said that he didn't think we were progressive enough, which we were pr we thought we were pretty pretty progressive, and we thought we were Alex.

SPEAKER_00 27:28

He was up there like criticizing the show for his story. Yeah. And for the middle of the show. For my story, I would like to give you a critique. Like, didn't see that coming. And that's a rap on part two. And I don't know about you, but I feel like I just got a masterclass encourage, disguised as a conversation about music mortality and the creative process. In part three, we talk storytelling, the craft, the community, the opportunities, and why you should give a shit about Stephanie's sparkly pants. And I will see you in part three. If you want to learn more about Stephanie and Story Jam, go to storyjamshow.com. As always, this has been the Spiritual Shit Show Podcast. My name is Suzanne Sowell. Thank you so motherfucking much for listening. And I will see you on the next one, darling. I say let's roll it.