Your Number One Addiction is Not DraftKings (w/Brendan Fitzgibbons)

In this solo extravaganza episode, Brendan talks about how your number one addiction is surprisingly not DraftKings...it's you. 

He dives headfirst into:

• The phone call that changed Brendan's life. 
• The incredible and simple power of telling someone you believe in them. 
• A technique to prime your brain to ONLY look for good. 
• Why thinking about your past will keep you stuck forever. 
• Peter Crone's thoughts on your number one addiction. 
• And why it's crazy that anyone can have a baby but you have to be certified to be a nail technician. 
  
  

RESOURCES
Brendan Fitzgibbons
Peter Crone Thoughts on Our #1 Addiction
Rhonda Byrne' 'Magic' Techniques 
Hitler's Parents

Transcript

Anybody else find it utterly insane that anyone can have a kid, but you have to be certified to be a nail technician? I mean, think about that. A murderer, a rapist, a horrible human being, a violent person, an abuser, can have a child. But goddammit, they cannot paint that kid's nails. No, you need a professional for that. 

You have to get certified to be a notary republic. . That means you have to go to school to watch people use a pen. Sir, go ahead and have 15 kids. It doesn't matter if you never will look after them, but if any of them wants to use a pen, they better go to school for it. 

From what I can tell from my friends who have had kids, there seems to [00:01:00] be one requirement, and that is you have to watch a video, and it has videos that has guidelines and rules for having a kid, and this is what the video is as far as I know. It's uh, Rule number one. Don't shake the baby. We're done with rules. 

Good luck out there. Power and the responsibility of having a kid is insane, okay? It's crazy. People always give Hitler shit. What about his parents? No one ever talks about his parents. They didn't just find him in the mustache dictator store, okay? He came from somewhere, he got his programming from something, and it's interesting everybody thinks that they're gonna be a great mom or a great dad. 

The number of times I've heard women be like, I'm gonna be a great mom, and I'm like, cool, I'm gonna be a great Olympic pole vaulter, and they're like, why would you say that? I'm like, Oh, I thought we were just saying things based on no evidence whatsoever. I'ma be a great astronaut! There's a reason why you never hear guys say, I'm gonna be a great dad someday. 

And that's because they know they're not. They're like, hey, I'm gonna be really [00:02:00] good at watching my wife be a great mom. That's what I'm gonna do. And by the way, everybody keeps saying, well, being a mom is the hardest job in the world. Being a parent is the hardest job in the world. Then, everybody can't be good at the hardest job in the world. 

Otherwise, it isn't the hardest job in the world. You never walk around and hear a bunch of people saying like, Hey, I'd be a great bomb detective specialist. Because after a while, if you heard more than, I don't know, ten people say that, you'd be like, maybe it's not that hard to be a bomb detective specialist. 

It's so important, guys. Everything that we've learned on this podcast, every expert, every human being we've talked to has said, you are literally forming a the majority of your opinions from ages 0 to 7. You are literally hypnotized with most of your adult beliefs from 0 to 7. So that means, from ages 0 to 7, Ryan Gosling's parents said to him, Hey man, I'm a nerd. 

All of America wants to fuck you. Welcome everybody to a brand new episode of Spiritual Asshole. I'm your host, Brendan Fitzgibbons, coming out hot today. I'm so glad you're here. [00:03:00] Thank you so much as always for being here. Hit me up on Instagram, follow me, it's at the underscore Brendan Fitzgibbons on Instagram, YouTube, and TikTok. 

I'm posting a lot of stand up videos, posting fun content. I'm going to be releasing my special really soon. Where I'll be posting a lot of santa clips, and I want to start posting more spirituality clips, more clips from this podcast. You are amazing. Reach out to me. I love hearing from you! You know, one of the things I've been talking about recently is how I was gonna start a fundraising campaign for my amazing shorts. 

Film slash TV show called death is normal because we are shooting in a couple weeks and I needed to get together 30, 000 to make this project for a three day shoot. And if you're like, that's a lot of money, I would say to you, have you been to urban outfitters? No, I'm kidding. But, um, It's been a major, obviously, focus of me this year. 

Focal point of what I want to do is shoot this. It's a huge deal to me. I care so much about this project. I love the people involved. We have some [00:04:00] amazing actors. I believe in this project. I believe this is going to be a TV show. And I'm so excited for you to see it. But, yeah, I'm not gonna lie. Like, securing the funds has been a little stressful for me. 

And I've taken some meetings with some people about selling it because I believe in it so much where you could like sell a piece of the show and then in return, you offer a portion of the sale if you sell the show. Right? So that's how they do the biz out here. I was going to launch a fundraising campaign on Monday. 

It's Wednesday, and I did not launch a fundraising campaign because Something incredible happened that I like to share with you guys, I'm only telling you guys this because I want you to believe in magic. This is not a brag And I also want to share good news with you because I want you to be happy So like six days ago, and I would say like about probably eight days ago. 

I contacted my uncle who's my godfather and He's a great guy We have a good relationship. I've stayed at his house multiple summers when I was interning for Michael Moore in New York, and I lived there for three months in 2018. His wife, who I'm not blood related to, but [00:05:00] is truly one of my favorite human beings in the world. 

they live in Florida now. My uncle is high up in investment banking, and he does well, okay? He does very well. But I called him! Like eight days ago, literally not expecting anything because I, I started reaching out to contacts that have people who have connections in the finance world. I'm not going to lie. 

Like the most of the people I know are artists and I have to tell this is a great tip for everybody. So I want to make this practical for people as well. You know, I got to talk to Tim Ferriss, my friend talked to Tim Ferriss, but I was there with him. Like, Six years ago, we were on the street in New York, and he cornered Tim Ferriss because he is creepy. 

No, because he interviews celebrities on the street. His name is Adam Glenn. He's actually done this podcast. And he asked Tim Ferriss, one of the people who have talked to the most human beings in the world, the highest experts of every field, any field, right? He said, what is the single most important piece of advice you would tell anyone? 

[00:06:00] And he said, you are the sum total of the five people that you hang out with the most. And so I would like to say to everybody right now, and it's something I'm constantly saying to myself, If you sit down at a table, and the five people that you talk to and hang out with the most are there, Are you happy with those five people? 

Are those five people pushing you in the right direction of the life that you want to live and where you want to go? And if you're sitting at the if your child is at the table and you're like, Fuck this kid, Maybe give the kid away. I'm kidding. This has been a this seems like it's been an anti kid episode. 

It's not. But, um, I love kids. Kind of. I love dogs. Kids are cool too. Anyways, so just remember that because here's why I think this is so important And that is because if you think about it, from a reality creation perspective, who you surround yourself with will show you what's possible Rich people that only hang out with rich people only know a wealthy lifestyle because that's all they see. 

And I remember I got into a little bit with my friend Matt, [00:07:00] not a fight, but he was just like, well, the law of attraction can't be real because look at poverty in Africa. And I'm like, That's actually the best example of the Law of Attraction because it's all you see, okay? So it's like what you see is possible is always going to propel you further. 

I had two of my childhood best friends growing up. We're both having some issues getting pregnant with their wives, okay? This went on for two years, right? Then about ten months ago, one of them got pregnant. Two weeks later, the other one got pregnant too, and they're best friends who talk all the time. So again, it's We are constantly showing each other what's possible. 

So make sure you're surrounding yourself with people who are showing you what's possible and not showing you with what's not possible. Those are the people that you would like to kick the fuck off your table. Okay? You don't need those people because here's the thing. So many great people waiting for you everywhere to push you in the right direction, to believe in you. 

Okay? So here's a story about that. So I called my uncle [00:08:00] eight days ago and I was like, Hey man, I didn't say hey, man. I was like, hey, I I got this project. It's got a budget 30, 000 Do you know anybody who angel invests because he's very connected in the finance world and he's like no But my company has an entertainment wing. 

Let me see if I can put you in touch with them. I was like cool So, they do a lot of entertainment deals, they deal with a lot of the biggest companies and agencies in Los Angeles, right? So I was like, okay, amazing. So I don't hear from him for six days, alright? I'm driving to Los Olivos, which is my true happy place, along with probably Ireland and Costa Rica. 

My favorite places in the world, like honestly, it's heaven. It's 40 minutes eastbound. Inward from Santa Barbara, you make a right, you go over the mountains, you're in heaven, what's up? Do you like it? You should. My uncle calls me. I'm like, oh shit, I can't take this call right now because I'm in the mountains. 

So I get to the hotel, and I'm with my really great friend. And he calls me, he's like, alright, so, What's up? [00:09:00] Where are you at with the funding with this? And I was like, well, you know, I was waiting to hear back from you. And then I was going to take some more meetings and I was going to, I'm launching a fundraising campaign on Monday, which would be two days ago. 

And he goes, okay, cool. So I talked to his wife and he's like, yeah, we're just going to go ahead and give you the money for this. And I was like, what? He's like, yeah, we're just gonna go ahead and give you the money for this. And I was like, are you serious? And he's like, yeah, and I can wire it to you tomorrow. 

And I was freaking out. I fully was not expecting that at all. I literally started crying. He doesn't know that. I told his wife. But, and he's like, yeah, we believe in you. We love you. Okay, get off the phone. Fully start crying in this parking lot. My friend is a witness to this. And just like, it was a longer conversation than this, just the power of somebody who's known you for so long saying we believe in you is worth that [00:10:00] phone call. 

That is as much important to me as the money. And it just really made me realize like, yo, tell people that you believe in them, especially people that might look up to you. And I definitely have always looked up to my uncle because it changes them fundamentally. And if you're providing a strong foundation for them always, that's great. 

And I'm happy you're doing that, but please God, especially if you're a parent, what's the worst that's going to happen. Or if you're a teacher if you are in any kind of higher up position, tell somebody that you believe in them because that fundamentally changed me. So I had the best 4th of July ever. 

I was so happy. I still am so happy. This project's green lit. It's all because of one person. And just shows you, like, this is why I want money, y'all. It's not, it's not for fuckin [00:11:00] toys. It's not for a mansion. I want it to greenlight my friends projects. I want it to change people's lives. I want it to, I want to fund all my friends projects. 

I want, I want to \ Empower people through their art, through their dreams, and this is why having money is a good thing. I'm not a Republican, But yeah, I it was one of the best things that ever happened to me, and I really, I really can't say enough, like, I fully was like, Getting I still am getting emotional thinking about it because I've had so much resistance. 

Like in the last two years about money and jobs and it's been a lot better this year But so much pain so much Anxiety so much doubt and then just have somebody basically shine a fucking huge bright light on you will change you And this is the shift. This is the shift that I've been looking for, but it's also, this is not about me. 

I want everyone to know that you have this [00:12:00] shift too, as well. And the universe wants to give you whatever you want. So, I hope that makes you feel good, and we're all gonna come along for this ride. If you listen to this podcast, you're gonna be a part of this ride, of this show. And it's gonna really, really, really Make things better. 

And then a cool story, like I told one of my friends, I'm like, yeah, my uncle gave me the money, like I don't want to tell too many people, and he's like, bro, that's ridiculous. He's like, my good friend Joe, he's like, no, I'm super happy for you. I didn't even think about that. He's like, if anybody at all questions you or questions even this happening, he's like, that person should not be in your life. 

, this again goes back to the table, doesn't it guys? . Get a good table. It could be a folding table. It's fine. Okay. So I've been teaching writing at a wonderful high school called ECHS through the great program of Michael's Daughter Foundation founded by Sierra Payton. 

And I've been going there every day for a month. We're doing like a crash writing and film course there. And it's been amazing. And I have to say, so like this again, kind of goes back to the table [00:13:00] thing. This high school is super unique in that. They have plants, they have farm animals, they have chickens, they have bunnies, and there's just trees, there's a pond, everywhere in this high school, and it's small, but it's all surrounded by the environment, and all the kids, like, help take care of the school, and I have never in my life seen a chiller high school, ever. 

I guarantee you, if you're gonna do studies about, like, violence in school, or, Stress, anxiety in school. I guarantee you this school has sincerely low numbers. Because nature is so healing. It's so empowering. And it's so, not empowering. It's so equalizing. Like nature calms you down. And also it makes you realize like, What's the big deal? 

We're part of this thing. It's, it's so simple. Today I just texted Andrea. I had acupuncture, and I was overlooking this, like, beautiful view in Glendale, overlooking these buildings and [00:14:00] the mountains, and I had to sit upright as he stuck five needles in my arms. And I was telling Andrea, my cousin, I was, like, looking at the palm trees, and they were just swaying. 

And, like, they were just so happy. And I was reminded of one of my mushroom trips when I just saw, like, nature basically being like, Hey, we're having a blast. This is actually extremely fun for us. You should maybe get out on this too, because it's pretty amazing. Like, they kept being like, you know, it's cool that you guys are humans. 

It's cool that you guys got thoughts and feelings and you think that that certain things are the certain way, but the truth is like, everything's kind of perfect and we're having an absolute blast. Then I saw this great post, I think my cousin sent it to me. I'll read it to you guys. This is a post, a famous quote by Osho. 

Osho? Osho. I don't think existence wants you to be serious. I have not seen a serious tree. I have not seen a serious bird. I don't know, crows look pretty fucking pissed. I have not seen a serious [00:15:00] sunrise. I have not seen a serious starry night. It seems they are all laughing in their own ways. Dancing in their own ways. 

We may not understand it, but there is a subtle feeling that the whole existence is a celebration. And I would just like to invite everybody out there to go tune into nature for a second. Put your phone down or turn it off, leave it in the car, and , just stare at nature and watch it do its natural dance. 

It's perfection. We're watching literal perfection. That's how I feel when I see my dog. I'm like, I am watching perfection in motion. That's all I am seeing. And I really think like, the more that we can realize that we are a part of this perfection, and the only thing that's stopping us from fully tapping into it is our own prison thoughts, our own brains. 

That's all we need. So I've been really listening to Ronna Byrne's Magic, which is a great book. Y'all should listen to it. And one of the habits that she, practices that she [00:16:00] wants you to do, for gratitude, is that you, uh, before you go to sleep, think of three things that were like the best part of your day. 

And I think why that's really good is that your brain really responds, and you know I'm loving some brain wiring. I'm actually trying a new brain technique tomorrow. I will fully report back on that. Your brain responds to and priming, right? So you prime your brain to look for things to celebrate. 

So just try it tonight before you go to sleep. Three things that were the best part of your day. And you're going to find yourself and watch your brain now search for more things. What happens is a lot of us are like, my life's going bad. And then your brain's like, great, let's look for more evidence of that. 

Your life is going bad. Holy shit, you're a pickleball player with rage issues. Can you imagine getting mad about pickleball? The sport you're playing is called pickleball. You can't yell. So try that tonight and see how that feels. Okay, so the main thing I want to tell you guys today, we're gonna keep it brief, the main thing I want to tell you guys today, and this is just me talking to you today, [00:17:00] we have some great guests coming up, but the main thing I want to talk to you guys about today is a great realization I've had recently. 

I think an important thing to ask yourselves is We talk a lot about thoughts in this podcast. Where are your thoughts mostly? Okay, where do they exist? Are you able to be in the current moment? Do you future trip? Do you past worry? Do you past ruminate? Maybe you do a mix of both. Maybe you're blacked out drunk. 

Congratulations. Your Mexican food's coming soon. Del Taco, I'm sorry. Okay, so why is this important? This is so important because it ties in a lot to what I've been reading and really diving in on is this idea that The more that we think about our past, the more that we become an addicted version of ourselves from that state. 

And we just keep dragging that version into every single present moment. And this is something I've totally been guilty of. And it hasn't hit me until recently that this is so clearly what I've been doing and why I think some of the massive [00:18:00] changes that I want to happen have not happened, is that I have consistently been ruminating about. 

The past. Okay. And the reason why that keeps you stuck is because you are in a state of survival when you thinking about the past, cause you're like, okay, let's break it down. Everything that's happened to you up until this point, you know what's happened to you, right? So you know that no matter what has happened to you, good or bad, however you see it, your body only sees things in terms of survival or not survival. 

No matter what's happened to you up until this point, You are here on this earth, you survive. So that zone, that area, is a safe zone, okay? So Joe Dispenza has a book called Breaking the Habit of Being Yourself. In that time, that past life, in the safe zone, let's call it a safe zone, let's call it the known, let's call it a survival state. 

That place is, quote, yourself, breaking the habit of being yourself. And by being yourself, [00:19:00] I don't mean your true, infinite, abundant nature. I mean the constructed reality of who you think you are. You think that you are all these things that have happened to you. You think that tomorrow you're going to be those things again. 

But the truth is, none of that is true. And living in the end and quantum leaping is all ties together. It's all about embodying a new version of you so that yourself, that habit of yourself no longer exists unless you like that part of yourself, which is also. An option, and it's also great. 

There's a lot of things about me that I like. I don't want to sit here and say that it's all shit and I have to change, or you have to change. But I will say, if you are like me, and you feel stuck, and if you ever feel stuck, if you ever feel like Groundhog Day, 99. 99999 percent of the time, it's because you are living in the past. 

Joe Dispenza said, according to Kristen Hempsteader, who I talk to all the time, who's the greatest, The reason why you think about the past so much is because you are not happy [00:20:00] with the present. And that is oh, so very true for me sometimes. And I think another reason why is I've had a lot of time on my hands and I heard this great quote where it was like, an idle mind always eventually starts looking back. 

And so. I have done everything I can now to be like, how can I fall in love with the now? How can I fall in love with the future? So you break the habit of being yourself. You break the habit of constructing of yourself by falling in love. With life, with someone, with the moment, by doing meditations, deep gamma meditations, by creating things, by taking risks, man. 

I took a risk to call my uncle. That was not an initially easy phone call for me. And, not because he made it not easy, it's because I, my own limitations. Calling my uncle was very unknown to me. But as Joe Dispenza said, the unknown has never let me down. So, [00:21:00] diving into this abyss, to this place that you think you can't break through, is actually where all of your growth is. Will Smith said before he punched Chris Rock in the face, all growth is collision, but the collision is not you versus someone else. It's you versus you. The collision is you bumping up against the habit of you. The habit that says I can't change or that says things are always the same or like, that's too scary. 

I don't, Go do ayahuasca cause that sounds terrifying. I don't go public speak cause that's not what I do cause that's safe here. So your body's just doing its job. And when we can reconcile, reconcile these two things. And that's where I really, really, really, really have had a breakthrough is like really seeing it more as like a positive. 

My body's trying to keep me safe. That's made me feel better. But let's not mince words here and say like There is no actual you. The you that you've created is just a construction of thoughts up until this point. You're capable of quantum leaping into a thousand different [00:22:00] things. 

And nobody puts this better than the great Peter Krohn. I love him so much. I saw this Instagram post recently. He talks about what is the single greatest addiction. Yeah, What I'm about to talk about is arguably one of the biggest challenges and hence opportunities for every human being on the planet, which is the misidentification that we have with the persona, the ego, the identity that we think that we are. 

Okay. Which is the container for all of human suffering, all of your woes, whether you struggle with emotions such as anxiety or depression or any sort of dis ease that can cascade into the physiology and sharpness sickness in your body as I would assert because of the fact that you live in with these subconscious prisons that are based in some negation of your true divine nature that inherently and unavoidably And to me, human suffering is at the root cause of everything that we deal with. 

What you call your everyday minor to major problems, to the sicknesses that people struggle with often chronically over many decades, to the dysfunction that we see in relationships, to the lack of value that you might [00:23:00] experience in the workplace where you struggle financially. All of these are extensions of the persona that you have become misidentified with by virtually being human. 

There's no guilt or shame in it. It is nonetheless the complete obstacle to you accessing your true boundless, timeless potential. Here's the biggest rub of all, is that that part of us that we're misidentified with is the thing that we are most addicted to. 

It is the I that you are for yourself, the conversation that is constantly ruminating around inside of your skull. And yet it is the complete constraint to you accessing your limitless potential. And I would assert that in order to be truly alive, you have to constantly die to the different iterations of yourself. Yeah, sorry, it's just, uh, us. But that's so fucking true, is it not? And it's also a combination of brain wiring, but it's just so easy to be like, Yeah, this is just who I am. I'm this guy. But you are anything. You are capable of anything. And if you don't believe me, look how much you've changed over the course of however old you are. 

I made the huge mistake of telling [00:24:00] all the kids that I teach at ECHS, the environmental school, how old I was, and they recently googled and said, Mr. You're older than the internet. Another kid said, Mister, I think you're older than the stapler which, fuck that. No, I'm not. 

The stapler was 1800. I was born in 1805. Really? I heard them whispering. They're like, When was Comedy Central invented? They're like, 1991. And they both looked at me. I was like, shut up! I'm being bullied by Gen Z. Yeah, and I never should have told my age.  

Always know that The change you seek always lies just beyond what you think is known. And you can puncture those walls by falling in love, by having gratitude. You are literally in an expansive state versus a contracted survival state. I know I've talked about this a lot, but I think it's everything. 

And I think, listen, I believe in manifestation. I believe in all this, but all those things to me are kind of like quick fixes to a much more substantial. If you [00:25:00] want a foundational change, you need to fundamentally change your identity. You can manifest 100, 000, you can manifest your perfect partner, but you're still going to be you. 

And if you're not fully comfortable with that you, go away, those fears about insecurities won't go away. How they can go away is by fundamentally changing your own identity, and you don't have an addiction to the past identity. Okay, I think you're the best and I think this week is gonna be absolutely mind blowing for you. 

I'm so excited I want you to tap into all the magic around you go outside go in nature go hug a tree You're not weird. Everyone else is weird. People are sitting around on laptops Just yelling about 85 year old men running for office. So no matter what can't be much weirder than that. 

I love you so much. I believe all your dreams can come true I believe there's so much love here for you. I believe in you I believe in the infinite essence of how powerful you are. And there are no limitations to what you can be. You're the best. [00:26:00]