Part 2 of SCAMMED By My Man For Over $2 Million Dollars!, Episode 5

In this episode of the Influence Her Mindset Podcast, Miko continues discussing Romance Scams in Part 2 of "SCAMMED by My Man For Over $2 Million Dollars!" This episode looks at the similar characteristics of two women that were scammed out of large sums of money in a Romance Scam. Building on the previous episode about Miko’s coworker scammed by someone she believed was a celebrity.  The current episode details a different woman with a similar profile of having a difficult marriage, going through a divorce, highly educated, and recognized as a Christian woman.  

The episode focuses on a woman in her 50s who was scammed out of $2 million by a man she met on FaceBook, who claimed to be working on a high-profile construction project abroad expected to yield $42 million dollars. Despite her intelligence, education, and financial stability, she fell victim due to emotional vulnerability and the scammer's manipulative tactics. Miko outlines the scammer's strategies, including creating false connections, making emotional appeals, and promising quick returns on the victim’s money. The woman did not recover her $2 million dollars and the scammer was never caught or identified!

Transcript

Thank you for joining me again for the Influence Her Mindset Podcast. I'm Miko and I am your host. So today we are talking about part two of scam by my Man. Okay, so in my last episode, we talked about my previous co-worker who had been scammed by somebody she met in Facebook. She thought he was a famous celebrity. She even changed her name in FaceBook to his last name. She sent out wedding invitations to our previous co-workers she even went on Dr. Phil because her kids were like oh my god mom is losing it she thinks she's dating this celebrity and we need your help Dr. Phil so they were on Dr. Phil and the part that I gather is that there were a couple of things that pretty much sent her to a breaking point. So nobody would really believe all of the things that kind of happened. And they were really close together. So if you could really put yourself in her shoes for a moment, you will see that life was life. And these are ordinary things that can happen to any of us. And today I want to break down like some of the specific things that are common when you're scammed by what we call a romance scam. So First, we learn she married her college sweetheart. She was very smart, very educated, went to HBCU, is my Sarah. So, you know, she was educated, you know, not somebody that you think would be easily scammed. she had four kids with her husband. They lived in a six-bedroom house they were well off. um her parents, when they passed, they left a nice inheritance for her and her siblings. So, she had a very good job. She ended up losing her job after 23 years. 

So, imagine the mindset that she was in. You got all these things happening to you back to back. And here comes Mr. Romeo. Mr. I have a couple of names I’m going to call him kind of in this story that I’m going to present to you today but just put yourself in the mind of somebody that's being human for a moment. And you can kind of see that Yes, she might have been really stressed and not really paying attention to the red flags. So today I'm going to try to educate you on some of these red flags that you should be looking out for. So let's get into it. How do you think the romantic scammer finds their victims? We're going to talk about it. How long do they watch and lurk when they're looking for their next victim? 

We are going to get into it, definitely. And, you know, what's a good time limit? You know, after we're dating the potential person that ends up being a scammer, how long do usually wait until they ask you for money? You will be surprised that this next story that I researched, very similar to the one in the first episode that talked about scam by my man my man, my man my man that is it's unbelievable. He scammed her out of a hundred thousand dollars the real story, my co-worker but this particular story I’m about to introduce you to had nothing on that one. 

So let's get into it. Very similar. I'm going to read just a little passage of what her account of how she met this man. You know, what does she think about the situation? She too was very educated. So she says they met online. He said he was a friend of a friend. This particular woman in her 50s, struggling in her marriage, and was happy to find someone to chat with. He was saying all the right things. She remembers, he took interest in me when nobody else did. He was really interested in what was going on with me and getting to know me. He was very positive. Of course he was. She felt like it was a real connection. She had made a real connection with this guy. That connection she may End up costing her. I'm going to take a pause for a second. This particular scam cost her two million dollars. that's right. This lady, in her 50s, struggling in her marriage, just looking for somebody to talk to, somebody that seemed interested. He was interested in her. Oh my God. Two million dollars. And all she had left was a heartache of thinking she was actually in love with this guy. She lost everything. She's never met this man in person. Never. He took her for every cent she had. Okay. This, my friends, is what we call a romance scam. So let's talk about it. Who is the victims that they're looking for? How do we spot who a victim is of the romance scam? They're usually old, older women. more experienced, maybe widowed women, divorced women for sure, maybe looking to possibly go into having a divorce. And they're usually targeted by this criminal organization and most of them are from Nigeria. Like there's a very real organized crime. I guess these individuals are usually so lucky in love I would say because they're scamming these women and most of them are in Nigeria. Now I'm not saying that's the only place it happens but it has been proven through cases that most of these criminals are from Nigeria and the address or the location that they're giving you uh when you're sending money to them or whatever, if you trace it back, it's usually like in a field or something. It's an empty lot or something like that. Nothing exists on the property. Okay? So who are they looking for? Who are these women they're looking for and where are they finding them? They're looking for the woman as computer savvy. Very educated. Emotional women. they research their potential victims very well. So ladies, listen up. Where are they looking at you? Your social media posts. Every time you're mad at your boo thing and you go to social media, Facebook or find a cute little video on tick tock or Instagram and you're venting through these cryptic messages On social media, Twitter, get rid of the Twitter fingers because they're looking at you. They're targeting you by what you're posting. They can tell, oh, she's emotional. He broke her heart. She's posting something about cheating. These social media posts that you use to vent, provide details to the scammers with everything they need to talk to you about, to friend you, to DM you. It's coming. You know, they learn the personalities of the women and they need something that they can use to say they have in common with you. So when they get ready to date you or to, you know, friend you, They start to bring up commonalities of the things that they've heard you say or they heard you reference or post. They troll you. It's almost like putting a fishing rod into the water to see what they can get. Who's going to bite? I'm going to start DMing these women. Yeah, she look like she been hurt. Oh yeah, he really did a number on her. Yeah, let me see. I'm going to try her out. Let me see who's going to take the bait. So, we're going to give them names today. Because I think it's fitting right here to start to give the scammer a name. So, I came up with a few myself. The Facebook Freak. The Instagram imposter. How about the tender swindler? The bumble bandit. The plenty of fish fryer match dot robbed or match. Robber okay the scammer is surfing these sites. So he's looking for the good target. And after reading the social media posts or whatever you're posting, they develop these mutual interests with you. Like, I mean, they want to show empathy like you've been hurt by your man. Man, I would never do that to you. Like, listen to me. You need a good man who's going to treat you right. I mean, he's going to come in real strong. He's going to be like, when I finally lay eyes on you. I’m going to treat you right. I'm going to show you what he's missing. You are a queen. You deserve to be treated like a queen. He don't respect you. He don't need you. I love you. I'm going to respect you and treat you right. Come on over to the Bumble Bandit. 

Hey, I ain't trying to give my coins to nobody. So I'm not on match that Rob. I'm not doing that So I'm telling you ladies, be smart. Because this woman who lost everything, She happily publicized her life on Facebook. She was a Christian. She was a giving woman. She was always like, oh my god. God bless them. You know, This Facebook freak, he really got the advantage over her by just reading some of her posts. I mean, she told him everything he needed to know. She was having a rough time in her marriage. I don't know what she posted, like, but it'll be evident to somebody trying to scam you. Like, let's keep our business, you know, to ourselves. Like, get rid of Vinny on social media for real. Like if you just want to be the victim of a next scammer, keep putting your business out there. I mean, sometimes we want to cap on social media like we throw money around. We showing, you know how much money we got. Like we, we, we, we I'm just saying it's a lot that we could like pull back. 

Nobody has to know how much you're spending on your man or your woman. Nobody has to know you just bought them a new car or... We don't even know from the outside if any of this is true. I mean because you could be playing with some fake money. I don't know. But I'm just saying. These people are looking to see how they can come up on you to become their next victim. So... here's what she said. She did not verify his claim to be a friend of a friend. He said he knew her through one of their mutual friends. She never verified who it was, never asked any questions. She said he would read my wall. She's talking about Facebook. um I would read his wall. We would post things. He would like my posts. I like his. Then it got to where we started sharing emails. Then we started sharing pictures. So the scammer has to do whatever he can do really quick. He got to hurry up and get you to a place of trusting him. Like he wants to build that trust right away. And the next thing you know, will you marry me? He is proposing or she is proposing marriage. Like, who doesn't love a good proposal every now and then? Like, come on, ladies, be honest. Like, you know, we want to be the one that's being proposed to, but we just wanted to be genuine. I mean, I said it before, I am not the person for online dating because that's just not my thing. But hey, a good proposal on social media. We posing for the gram. He didn't roll out the nice little lights. Will you marry me? You know, the rose petals all over the bed. Hey, I see some really nice proposals. I mean, I get a little jealous sometimes, but hey, It may work for them. It doesn't work for me. But hey, I feel like great, you know. So he always would make plans to meet in person. Getting back to the story, he's making these plans when they're going to finally meet. However, they never end up meeting again. 

And so now that he's built up the trust and they're telling each other they love one another. I love you. You love me. He goes in for the kill and he asks for the money. Give me my money. He's going in. He's built up the confidence. She trusts me. She believes me. She loves me. She will help me. If I give her a good enough story. So let's see what story he gave her. But before we get into the real story he gave her. Did you know in 2000, well, mid part of 2000. There was 15,000 complaints in one year of romance scams. But just, I mean, that sounds like a lot. But let's talk about the money that was involved. $230 million. And we in Texas, you want to know how much Texas had in that? At least $16 million Romance scams reported. This is a crime. You're not going to get away with it. If we can track you down, we're prosecuting you. So yes, $16 million for Texas. Now they did a little poll about the highest claims for this romance scam by state. So the highest numbers of the victims were in California, of course, it's a big state. Texas, of course, big state. Florida, New York, and Pennsylvania, highest states for the romance scams. I don't want to say we green, but hey, you got a lot of people you working on. So it may not be you, but somebody is getting scammed and somebody is getting the money. So, here's what this woman was going through. She claims, I was very emotional. I was in an abusive marriage for over 10 years. Things had not been good in my marriage. And when this man came along, he was a breath of fresh air. He was somebody to talk to. Somebody to, you know, just confide in. Somebody to just make me feel seen. He was a new online friend. And, you know... He seemed to come along at the right time is what she said She was looking for happiness she was unhappy and She thought she had found her happiness in this guy from Facebook, of course she did so Most of these scammers like they have a very similar story They're working in construction or a building project and it's outside of the US. So very believable. And this is why they can't come see you into the US. So that's why a lot of times we find that these criminals are in a different country. So. it makes it easy for them to avoid that in-person contact but they're promising you as soon as I come home I’m coming to see you we going to do a b and c we going to be booed up I mean we going to hibernate we going to be hey we going to do the thing you know so all of a sudden He's working. He's out of the country. He's building things. He told her he was working on a $42 million project and he's outside of the country. And oh my God, he has a medical emergency. And right away, you know, he needs to pay for some of his workers and he needs a loan right away. And he promises to pay back the money that he needs within 24 to 48 hours. 

I'm going to send you your money right back. I'm working on this big project I mean, I can't get the money to the project is over with but I promise you My boo thing we engaged my money is your money. We get married So hey, let me let me just two million real quick And I don't need it all I'm not going to ask you for the whole $2 million. Just a little bit. Just float me over until I get my $42 million contract that I've been working on. Because anybody knows that if you're working on a big project, like a building project, you're not getting the whole amount up front. As you complete the work, they pay you. It goes according to how much did you complete in a certain amount of time, a level of completion. Nobody's going to pay you a whole $42 million up front and all you have is the dirt you know on the ground and you building the foundation you know hey that's not going to fly so he was letting her know, like, hey, as soon as I come to the States, if you can help me out right now, I don't have access to, like, a bank out here. There's nothing out here. We're developing the project. If you can just, like, send me some money through western union or something like that, just wire it to me. Through my bank. I can get it right back to you. As soon as I can pay for this medical emergency. So. Okay. Alright. You know. Yeah. So. He's contacting her. You know, he's trying to finish up a job and he needs the money. And she said, you know, I thought about it long and hard. 

I gave it some thought. And is this the Christian thing to do? He does have workers. He's trying to pay. You know, it is an emergency. He did say he was going to give me my money back in 24 to 48 hours. I mean, I trust him. I love him. We've been talking for too long for him to just really, you know, not do what he says. I believe him. and what kind of Christian would I be not to, you know, trust him he's we're get we're engaged we're getting married. Like, for god's sake, this is going to be my husband. Like, I thought about it really long and hard is what she said. She came to the realization, she said, I prayed about it, it was a kind of statement of faith she said so she wired him $30,000 a day passed by and then another day didn't get the money back She thought to herself, everything is okay. I trust him. He said he's going to pay my money back. I'm going to trust him. He just may have been somebody that kind of ran into some bad luck. Hey, I got this money sitting in the bank. $30,000 is not going to hurt me. I got a couple million in the bank. It's fine. Then he needed another 30. For the next two years. Story after story. New request after new request. Babe. It's wired me to $60,000 real quick. We almost finished with the project. I know I owe you all this other money, and I promise you, I got you. As soon as this project comes, I mean, this $42 million is going to set us right. Trust me. I got you. Everything he said made sense to her. 

She believed it because they were in love. He was saying all the right things. It even got to the point where she had a financial advisor and the financial advisor is like, hey, wait a minute. Let's meet. I mean, I see this money is coming out of your bank. I mean, I see you making wire transfers pretty regularly. Let's meet. Let's talk about this. Let's you know, let's put the brakes on this. Hold on a second. Like the money is dwindling down quick. Let's meet. Financial advisor says, hey, I think something is going on. Like, are you sure this person is not scamming you? She said, no, no way. We pray on the phone. We laugh. We talk about church. We talk about everything after church, the sermons. We sing together. He uplifts me. There's no way he's scamming me. We are engaged to be married. Like he is my soulmate. I mean, I'm divorced now and we are getting married. 

So the struggling marriage that she once had, she did get a divorce. You know, that was over and done with. New person steps in. He has given her everything she needs to feel comfortable as a woman. Promising her this $42 million, I got you. We're going to be living good. He don't know what he's missing out on. Your previous husband didn't appreciate you. I got you. The scammer scammed her out of $2 million. He's never been caught. are identified. Still at large. Believed to be somewhere in Nigeria. No. No plans of being brought to justice. He even had a few accomplices along the way. That, you know, pretty much. They were caught up in the scam because they actually came to the U.S. and they said they were coming to get some of the money that was promised in this deal to bring it back to the person that they were working for on this building project because the $42 million had to be wired. They were here to pick up a few of the collections and they end up getting caught. They end up getting three years in prison. It was two of them. 

The main scammer never caught. Do you know this lady accounts the last thing she said in this interview was she still wants to believe this guy is real. There's no way. What they talked about, the things they had in common was not real. They had a real connection. They loved each other. The emails they exchanged, the love letters, the pictures, the posts we liked, the plans we made, the money he made on the project. She still believes one day he's going to pay her money back She is still holding out hope for this person and you know My heart goes out to her and I am doing my part to encourage women everywhere. To educate women everywhere. This is a part of me getting the message out to you. You can be very smart, book sense, degree, professional, computer savvy, emotional. We are very emotional. Please, let's think about it. Let's think a little bit harder. 

If some time goes by and all you have is a bunch of requests for money and you're he's only stimulating your mind. I'm here to influence your mindset. Think about yourself first. You work for this money really hard. He doesn't deserve it. He doesn't deserve you. You have to think about it before you start just shelling out money just because you want to have that relationship with somebody. Again, I will say it. Men are very good at what they do. They make love to your mind. If they can make love to your mind, they can control your money. Do not let this be your story. Decide today. am going to put me first. I'm going to keep my money in my bank account. I work for the money. I deserve the money. And when there is the equal relationship going both ways, he's giving. He's not just the taker. She's giving. She's not just the taker because this is equal opportunity. It is not just one-sided. Okay, this could just happen to women. This happens to me into all the time all the time nobody is exempt from this particular scammer. So, my thing today is, hey, let's be careful ladies. Let's watch out. Don't fall victim to the Facebook freak. The Instagram imposter. The too good to be Twitter man. Hey, the tender swindler. The bumble bandit. The plenty of fish fryer. And the match stock robber. Don't let it be your story. Cut all ties. Don't fall for the scam. The romance scam. Find you somebody you can connect genuinely in person. I wouldn't spend too much time online if you need to meet this person meet them in a safe place in a public place take a friend with you because too many things can go wrong when you're meeting somebody for the first time one on one. Even when you think you know this person, things always go wrong. We've had too many issues where you think you know a person and then the next thing we know, we don't see you no more. I mean, that's just what it is. Be careful. I am doing my civic duty next time in the episode we are going to get into meeting somebody genuinely the right questions to ask when we're getting to know our potential person that we want to fall in love with or that we think we fell in love with but we need to know a little bit more about you so I am going to start covering like a couple of I'm going to do a series of podcasts on relationships, couples, making it an equal relationship financially, and it's going to be healthy for your mindset. We are going to ask the right questions for our boo. We're going to get to know them. So stay tuned for the next episode. We're going to get into it. We're going to learn what it is to have a healthy relationships and the proper questions you should ask and some potential red flags in whoever's responses. If it's a woman, her response. Hey, if it's a red flag, we need to know up front. Okay. Hey, that didn't sound right. I don't like how she answered that. She might not be the one. I don't like how he said he don't want to share bank accounts. He might. That's not the one. So that's all I have for you today. Thank you so much. We covered a lot in this episode of scam by my man, my man, my man, my man. But hey. I enjoyed it. Thank you for hanging out with me. And this has been another great episode of the Influence Her Mindset podcast. Thank you. And I will see you next time. Bye bye.