Leading Her Introvert Way: Conversations about executive leadership, career growth, business and mindset for mid-life Black women.

77: What Happens When Black Introvert Women Bring The Fire With Managerial Courage

• Nicole Bryan • Episode 77

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Managerial courage might be the missing key to your executive leadership journey. As a Black introverted woman navigating corporate environments, finding your voice when everyone seems content with silence can feel daunting – but it's precisely this courage that distinguishes executives from middle managers.

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Speaker 1:

Hi, lady Leader, and welcome back to another episode of Leading Her Introvert Way. Now, I had to do some maneuvering in order to actually be here today to record this episode. I've been looking forward to this conversation we're going to be talking about a little something different today and I've been looking forward to kind of getting here and talking about it with you. But it's been a hell of a day, and it's interesting because the day was going really well Like I started out. I did my hot yoga this morning and then I met up with one of my former bosses. We had like a marathon breakfast. We spent like two and a half hours at a diner just catching up and talking about everything that's changed since we worked together. And then I came back home because I needed to meet with someone who's going to do some work around my house, and so I wanted to get a quote from them, right. So it was a pretty easy going morning essentially. And then and I know you're going to be able to relate to this but then what happened was I just reached out to connect with my team just to say, hey, how's it going today? Any issues, any concerns? And one of them, you know she was like no, no concerns. But then she proceeded to tell me about a conversation that she had with another one of my peers another, another leader and as she's saying and relaying the conversation, every word that she said was pissing me off more and more.

Speaker 1:

No-transcript Meaning that as senior leaders in any organization, I am always expecting my colleagues I don't care what your function is, I don't care what your responsibilities are, I don't care where you have come from I always look to my peers who are senior leaders to set the standard for the rest of the organization. I would want my team members, for example, when I'm not around, to be able to go to any senior leader with an issue, a problem, a challenge, to ask for help, to be encouraged. That's what I think real good leadership is. And in this instance I feel like my colleague was actually trying to manipulate my team member. Whether that was done deliberately or not, I'm not in that person's mind, so I can't predict, I can't say, but I know that my colleague knows better and so that kind of you know.

Speaker 1:

It took me off course for a minute. My poor team member was like uh, are you okay? And I had to be very clear. I'm like, I am not angry at you, I am not yelling at you, but I am very frustrated with this situation and I just need to get that out of my system. And then I immediately moved into okay, we're going to solve this problem.

Speaker 1:

You know, those types of little things I mean, they're honestly not big things it's the little things that sometimes can take us off course, that sometimes can, you know, become a needle or a thorn in our sides. The big things we can tackle we expect those things to come up. We will put our heads down, we'll figure it out, we'll problem solve. But it's when these smaller things happen and you have higher expectations for yourself and others in the moment and it doesn't pan out. But that's okay. It was a lesson, not for myself, it was a lesson for my team member, so that when these types of situations come up in the future, she'll know how to handle it, and right now, that's the best we can hope for.

Speaker 1:

With that said, I was looking forward to coming and being on the podcast with you before that transpired, and now that I've dealt with that situation, I'm excited to be here, because today we're going to be talking, like I said, about a topic that is a little bit different, so I might need to pause. And after that quick rant, let me formally introduce myself, particularly if you are new to the Leading Her Way podcast. My name is Dr Nicole Bryan and I help Black introvert women land their next senior leader role, become elite executive leaders and build wealth. So welcome to today's episode. I want to have a heart-to-heart conversation about something that's rarely discussed, like I mentioned, but it is absolutely essential for your journey to executive leadership, and the topic I want to talk about today is what I call managerial courage. You know we have spent the last five weeks talking about strategies and frameworks right, because what we've been doing is talking about topics leading up to my April 12th webinar. If this is the first time you're hearing about it, you still have a few days to actually sign up for the webinar. It is free and it is fully dedicated and designed for Black introverted women who want to advance their careers to the senior leadership level. So we're going to be covering strategies and tactics and mindset to help you get there. If you haven't already signed up, then definitely go into the show notes. The link is there and, like I said, you have another day or two before we actually close registration for the webinar.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so today I want to go a little deeper. Right, for the past five weeks or so, we've been talking all about strategies and frameworks. We talked about, for example, the Black Excellent Track. We've talked about how you, as an introverted leader, can use strategic documentation. In today's podcast, I want to go deeper. I want to talk about what's really holding many of us back from stepping into executive leadership. For so many brilliant Black, introverted women that I work with, it's not actually about skills or strategies. Now, yes, skills and strategies are important, and many of the women that I work with want to learn skills and strategies, but that's not what's really holding them back from reaching the executive level. It's about something more fundamental the courage to say yes to yourself when everything and everyone around you seems to be saying no.

Speaker 1:

I define managerial courage as having the wherewithal, the audacity to be and do the things that other people won't or don't. It's about standing up for what you know is right, even when everyone and everything around you is going down a different path or thinking a different way. I remember sitting in a senior leadership meeting years ago and we were discussing a major product launch and I could see clear as day that the timeline was completely unrealistic. Everybody around the table was nodding in agreement with the impossible deadline, worried about challenging the CEO right? I felt that knot in my stomach, you know. You know the one right, no-transcript. The room went completely silent. Then the CEO looked at me and said this is exactly why we need different perspectives in leadership. That moment, that moment, right there, it changed my entire career trajectory. Not because I was the loudest voice in the room because I wasn't, but because I found the courage to use my voice when it mattered most.

Speaker 1:

Today I want to talk about why this kind of courage is perhaps the most important step in your journey to executive leadership, especially as a Black, introverted woman. So let's talk about what managerial courage really means in practice for us as being Black, being introverted and being female in large and small organizations. It can be something as small as saying the thing in the room that nobody else is willing to say, even though everybody knows what it is. You know those meetings where there's an elephant in the room and everybody's dancing around it. Managerial courage is naming that elephant, calling it out. Or managerial courage could be as significant as defending an idea that you absolutely know is the right thing to do, one that will get the results that everybody wants, even though you know people will resist the change that you're trying to implement.

Speaker 1:

Managerial courage can also be an ethical issue. It can have an ethical dimension too. It's when you know that you are in the right, or when you know that what you're recommending is the right thing to do, regardless of the consequences, regardless of how people might think about you, regardless of the relationships that might be strained as a result. Managerial courage is digging deep inside yourself to do the thing, to say the thing or to be the thing that you're scared of doing, you're scared of saying and you're scared of being Now. For us, as Black women, this takes on additional dimensions because we navigate environments where our authority is already often questioned, where we face the double burden of race and gender bias, and where the consequences for speaking up can be more severe than for others. And, as introverts, there's the added layer of needing to push beyond our comfort zone or internal processing, to externalize our thinking, to say things out loud, often in high pressure and high visibility situations.

Speaker 1:

One of my clients, denise she, was in a situation where her department was about to implement a new customer service system that she knew had serious flaws. The vendor had impressive presentations and senior leadership was super excited about the technology, but Denise had done her homework and she discovered that the system had failed in similar implementations at other companies. So then she was faced with a choice she could stay quiet and go with the flow, or speak up and potentially be seen as the naysayer who was blocking innovation. Despite being naturally reserved, she prepared her case meticulously and presented her concerns along with offering a different approach directly to the executive team. Let me just be real. It was not easy. She faced resistance after resistance, particularly from the colleagues who had championed the original system, but her courage saved the company from a costly mistake and positioned her as someone with both the insight and the integrity to make tough calls. That, my friend, is managerial courage. It's not about being fearless, because Denise will tell you herself she was freaking terrified. It's about acting despite the fear because you know it's the right thing to do. You know it is in not just your best interest, but in everybody's best interest.

Speaker 1:

For another one of my clients, amara, managerial courage looked completely different In this instance. She was the only Black woman on her leadership team and she noticed that the diverse candidates were consistently being overlooked in the hiring process, despite the company's stated commitment and value of diversity. Sound familiar. Her managerial courage moment came when she decided to create a structured hiring process for a role that she was recruiting for, and that structured hiring process reduced bias, even though it meant challenging the gut feeling approach that had been the norm. She didn't make a grandstand or even a public accusation, because that just wasn't her style. Instead, she quietly but firmly implemented a system that changed the outcomes without creating unnecessary conflict or unnecessary waves.

Speaker 1:

That's another important aspect of managerial courage. Especially for introverts, it doesn't always look like a dramatic confrontation. Sometimes it's the quiet, persistent stand for what's right that ultimately creates the most change. So why does this happen right? Why aren't more Black introverted women more courageous on their path to being an executive? Well, let's talk about it honestly, because there are fears that hold us back from embracing managerial courage.

Speaker 1:

I've had the distinct honor of working with hundreds of Black introverted women on their executive journey, and certain fears come up consistently what if I speak up and I'm wrong? This fear of being incorrect or imperfect keeps so many brilliant women silent. But here's the truth Even the most seasoned executives are wrong sometimes. The difference is they understand that leadership isn't about being right all the time. It's about facilitating the best decisions with the information that is available to you. What if they think I'm being aggressive? This fear is grounded in the very real double standard that Black women face, where behavior that would be labeled assertive or direct in others gets labeled as aggressive or difficult when coming from us. It's not an imaginary concern. Do not let anybody gaslight you. It is very, very real. But managing that concern by silencing yourself comes with an even greater cost the cost of your impact and your advancement. What if I damage relationships that I need? Leadership often requires making decisions that not everyone will like. The fear of damaging relationships can keep you prioritizing harmony over effectiveness, but true leadership relationships are resilient enough to withstand honest disagreement. What if this affects how people see me?

Speaker 1:

For introverts who already feel the pressure of managing perception, there's often concern that taking a courageous stand will create an unwanted spotlight. This fear keeps many brilliant women playing small when they're capable of so so much more. My client, tasha, struggled with this fear big time. As a naturally reserved person who preferred to influence through one-on-one conversations. She worried that challenging a powerful senior leader publicly would forever change how she was perceived. And she was right, but not in the way that she thought when she finally found the courage and she had to dig deep for that courage, but when she finally found it she respectfully but firmly challenged a flawed strategy, and she didn't become known as difficult or confrontational. Instead, she became known as thoughtful, principled and someone who cared more about the company's success than her own comfort. That reputation accelerated her path to the executive role.

Speaker 1:

The most and the biggest fear, though, is what I call the who am I to fill in the blank fear. Who am I to challenge the decision? Who am I to suggest a different approach? Who am I to aspire to executive leadership? This question who am I to fill in the blank? Keeps countless brilliant women from bringing their full value to their organizations and from pursuing the leadership roles that they are more than qualified for. The answer to who am I to? Is simple but profound. You are exactly the person who should. Because of your unique perspective, because of your thoughtful analysis, because of your commitment to doing what's right even when it's hard, you are precisely the leader organizations desperately need.

Speaker 1:

Okay, so now let's talk about what happens when we avoid managerial courage, because there are some very real consequences, both for you and your career, as well as for the organizations that you serve First of all, your career plateaus. Organizations that you serve First of all, your career plateaus. Without managerial courage, you may be seen as a reliable executor, but not as leadership material. You are seen as the person who does not have leadership potential. Executive roles require the ability to make tough calls, challenge the status quo when necessary and advocate for better approaches, even when they're not popular. Without you being able to demonstrate these capabilities, you're likely to remain in support roles rather than advancing to true leadership. I've seen this play out time and time again Women who are capable and have all the technical skills needed for their executive roles and all the certifications and all the education, still remain stuck in middle management because they have not demonstrated the courage component of leadership.

Speaker 1:

The second thing is that you experience a values disconnect that leads to disengagement. So when you consistently choose not to speak up for what you believe is right, you create an internal conflict between your own values and your actions and, over time, this leads to you being completely disengaged or burning out and having a sense that your work doesn't have any meaning. Or burning out and having a sense that your work doesn't have any meaning. A client once told me I feel like I left myself at the door for so many years that I'm not sure who I am at work anymore. That type of disconnection from your authentic self is both professionally limiting and personally damaging. Third, you sacrifice impact, and I know that one of the main things that I hear when I talk to you and other women is that you want to make impact. You want to have a deep, deep and long lasting impact from your work, but every time you choose not to exercise managerial courage, you limit your impact on your team, on your organization and, ultimately, on your industry. The unique perspective you bring as a Black, introverted woman is precisely what makes your potential leadership so valuable. When you withhold that perspective, then everyone loses.

Speaker 1:

I worked with an incredible woman. Her name was Michelle. I worked with an incredible woman. Her name was Michelle, and she had been silently watching her company make the same mistakes in their diversity recruitment efforts for years. She had clear insights about why their approaches weren't working and what could be done to make it more effective. But she kept those insights to herself because she was fearful. Right, she feared being seen as the Black woman who only cares about diversity issues. When she finally found the courage to present her recommendations, the impact was immediate and significant. Within six months, the company had completely revamped their approach based on her guidance, and the results spoke for themselves.

Speaker 1:

Think about that Years of potentially transformative impact lost because one person, you fared speaking up. That's the real cause, right there, of avoiding managerial courage. And finally, and perhaps the most significant, when you don't take on managerial courage, and finally and perhaps the most significant, when you don't take on managerial courage, you reinforce imposter syndrome. Every time you choose not to step into courage, you send yourself the message that you don't really belong at the leadership table. These small choices, they accumulate, they pile up over time, deepening the sense that you're not executive material, when the reality is your caution about demonstrating courage is the only thing, the only thing holding you back. Okay, so we talked about the consequences of not having and demonstrating managerial courage.

Speaker 1:

Now let's flip the script and talk about what happens when you do embrace managerial courage, because the benefits can transform your entire career. When you have managerial courage, the first thing that happens is that you create a reputation for integrity and judgment that accelerates your advancement. When you consistently demonstrate the courage to do and say what's right, even when it's hard and difficult, you build a powerful professional reputation. You build a powerful brand. This brand, this reputation, becomes a career accelerator and it opened doors to opportunities that might otherwise be closed to you. My client, kimberly, was known for years as a reliable team player, which sounds positive but was actually keeping her stuck in supportive roles. Everything changed for her when she found the courage to challenge a major strategic direction during a critical meeting. Her thoughtful, evidence-based perspective ultimately changed the company's approach and within months, she was being considered for roles that had been previously out of reach because she had demonstrated a critical executive quality, and that quality was the courage to stand for what's right, even when it's uncomfortable.

Speaker 1:

A second thing that happens when you demonstrate managerial courage is that you align your external actions with your internal values, which creates a sustainable engagement and fulfillment for you right In the job in the company. When your professional choices consistently reflect your core values, work becomes more than just a job in the company. When your professional choices consistently reflect your core values, work becomes more than just a job, more than just a paycheck. It becomes a meaningful expression of who you are. This kind of alignment is particularly important for Black women, because we often feel pressure to compartmentalize or to code switch in professional environments. Managerial courage allows you to bring more of your authentic self to your leadership, creating sustainability that prevents burnout.

Speaker 1:

The third thing that happens when you demonstrate managerial courage on a consistent basis is that you maximize your impact on the organization, on your industry and, ultimately, on your leadership legacy. The unique perspective that you bring as a Black, introverted woman has the potential to transform how organizations totally operate, how teams collaborate, how decisions are made. But that potential can only be realized when you have the courage to assert your perspective, even when, no, especially when it differs from the dominant view. My client, denise. Her courageous decision to implement a more structured, less biased hiring process didn't just change outcomes at her company. Her approach was so successful that it was adopted across the organization and eventually presented at an industry conference. What began as one woman's courageous stand became a model that influenced hiring practices across her entire industry. That is the kind of impact that becomes possible when you embrace managerial courage and, lastly, you prove to yourself that you are indeed executive material when you embrace managerial courage. Each time you exercise your managerial courage, you build evidence that counters imposter feelings and the imposter syndrome that you might have been dealing with before. Over time, these experiences create an unshakable confidence in your leadership capabilities not an confidence based on affirmations, but a grounded confidence based on actual evidence of your courage and your capability.

Speaker 1:

Now I want to address something important. I want to talk about how managerial courage specifically looks for introverted leaders, because often it doesn't match the stereotypical image. We tend to picture a managerial courage as the person standing up dramatically in a meeting, passionately, making their case, with charisma and with force. And certainly courage can look that way. But for introverted leaders, especially introverted Black women, managerial courage often takes different forms that are equally powerful but less celebrated. Sometimes managerial courage is asking the question that nobody else will ask. In a culture of quick decisions and surface level analysis, the courage to slow down and ask have we considered X? Can be revolutionary.

Speaker 1:

Sometimes managerial courage is providing written perspective that challenges the consensus. For those of us who process internally and express ourselves best in writing, a thoughtfully prepared document that presents an alternative viewpoint can be a powerful act of courage. Tasha, an introverted leader who struggled with thinking on her feet in meetings, found her courage through creating what she called perspective documents. Before major decisions, she would compile a one-page analysis that thoughtfully challenged assumptions and presented alternative viewpoints. These documents became highly valued by the executive team, eventually earning her a seat at the leadership table. Other times, managerial courage is having the one-on-one conversation that addresses an issue directly rather than letting it fester. Not all courageous acts happen in public forums. Often, the most impactful demonstrations of courage happen in private conversations, where difficult truths are spoken with clarity and with compassion.

Speaker 1:

Managerial courage does not have to fit the extroverted stereotype to be effective. In fact, the thoughtful, measured courage that comes naturally to introverts can be especially powerful because it's grounded in deep consideration rather than impulsive reaction. As a Black, introverted woman, your version of managerial courage will be uniquely yours. It will be shaped by your specific strengths, by your values and by your circumstances. The key, though, is not to try to demonstrate courage in ways that drain your energy or compromise your authenticity, but to find expressions of courage that align with who you are, while still creating the impact that you want. So how do you develop this essential quality right. How do you get more managerial courage? It is not something you're either born with or without. It's a capacity. It's a capability that can be intentionally cultivated.

Speaker 1:

The first thing you need to do is clarify your non-negotiable values. Courage becomes much more accessible when it's anchored in clear values. Take the time to identify three to five core values that define who you are as a leader. When you're facing a situation that requires courage, you get to ask yourself what would a leader who truly values this core value do in this situation? So, for example, if one of your core values is intellectual integrity, asking this question might give you the courage to challenge a flawed analysis, even when it's politically safer to remain silent. The second thing you're going to want to do as you develop your managerial courage is start with small acts of courage. Don't try to bite off the biggest thing that you can find. Courage is like a muscle it strengthens with use. So look for low-risk opportunities to practice speaking up or offer a different perspective or advocate for what you believe is right. My client, kimberly, began by simply asking one thoughtful question in each leadership meeting. This small practice built her confidence to eventually challenge larger, systemic and strategic directions when necessary.

Speaker 1:

The third thing that you can do as you kind of build your managerial courage muscle is create support structures. Your courage doesn't have to be a solo endeavor. Build relationships with trusted colleagues who can give you feedback, who can encourage you, who can sometimes stand with you in solidarity when you need to take the courageous stand. A lot of my clients have formed what they call courage circles, which are like small groups of like-minded professionals who support each other in developing, exercising managerial courage. These structured support systems make courage more sustainable over time. And the fourth thing that you can do to kind of build your managerial courage muscle is to document your courage wins. Keep a record of times when you demonstrated courage and the positive outcomes resulted. This creates evidence that counters self-doubt and builds your confidence up for future courageous actions. And, lastly, work with a coach or a mentor who can help you develop courage in your specific context, because context does matter. Where you work, who you work for, that's part of the context that matters and should help influence how you demonstrate your own personal version of managerial courage. But working with a coach or a mentor can help you do that, having someone who believes in your leadership potential and can provide guidance on navigating complex situations can be invaluable in building your courage capacity.

Speaker 1:

Now that's the perfect transition time to remind you about my upcoming webinar. If you are struggling with managerial courage, if you're scratching your head and saying you know what, nicole, you're right, I need that, I've got to build that. Or if you want support in developing the full range of capabilities needed for executive leadership as a Black introverted woman, then I invite you to join my webinar on April 12th From Invisible to Invincible Strategies for Black Introverted Women to Get their Executive Promotion in Five Months or Less. In this webinar, I'm going to be sharing my complete system for accelerating your path to executive leadership, a system that has worked for dozens of women and a system that honors your authentic strengths as an introvert while helping you navigate the specific challenges that Black women face in large and small companies. The link to register is in the show notes. It's completely free and I promise you it will be one of the most valuable investments of time you'll make in your career.

Speaker 1:

You might be afraid of becoming an executive leader, and I get it. Executive leadership is not for the faint of heart. Being an executive means that people see you, even when you think you're not seen. You are ultimately responsible for decisions that sometimes you don't even want to make. You're setting the strategy for your team or your department or your company, and that has ramifications way beyond what you're doing on a day-to-day basis. It affects your team and your team's families. It has ramifications for end customers and internal customers. It has ramifications for end customers and internal customers. It impacts revenue generation or revenue not being generated.

Speaker 1:

The influence you have as an executive leader goes way beyond being responsible for just you. Your scope as an executive leader is much bigger, and that's a lot of responsibility. It is, for some people, meaning executive leadership is exactly exactly what some people want and what some people need, but for other people it isn't. Executive leadership is not for everyone, but if you've already decided that executive leadership is what you want, if that is your vision, if it's the vision you have for yourself in terms of how you're going to make an impact and leave a leadership legacy, then managerial courage is non-negotiable. You have to be willing to push your own boundaries and go after what you want and what you need in order to accomplish what you're here to do.

Speaker 1:

The beautiful thing about managerial courage is that, like all forms of courage. It doesn't require the absence of fear. It simply requires taking action despite that fear. And every time, every single time, you choose courage over comfort, you not only advance your leadership journey, you create more space for other Black introverted women to do the same. Lady Leader, thank you so much for lending me your ear once again and joining me on today's podcast episode. I cannot wait to see the courageous leadership that you bring to the world and, as always, keep leading your introvert way.

Speaker 1:

That's a wrap for this episode of Leading Her Way. Thanks for tuning in. If you have thoughts, questions or ideas for future topics, connect and send me a message on LinkedIn and if you enjoyed today's episode, subscribe. And please take a minute to write a quick review on Apple Podcasts. Your review will help spread the word to other ambitious females so they know they're not alone and that this podcast is a community of support for all of us. Leading her way to the top. Remember your leadership is needed, your leadership is powerful, so lead boldly Until next time.