Recovery Unfiltered
Taking recovery discussion to a different level. Bringing comedy and the lighter side of sober living along with educating non-alcoholics and alcoholics. Hear real stories unfiltered.
Recovery Unfiltered
Sobriety Birthdays: Celebrating Recovery Milestones
Standing at the metaphorical "edge of the sidewalk," where addiction and recovery intersect, requires a profound choice about which path to take. This raw, honest conversation delves into the significance of sobriety birthdays and what they truly represent beyond simple abstinence from alcohol.
We explore the emotional complexity of recovery anniversaries, particularly the tendency to relive painful memories during the weeks leading up to these milestones. This phenomenon, common yet rarely discussed, serves as a powerful reminder of why we chose recovery in the first place. The distinction between the day someone decides to get help and their actual first day of continuous sobriety creates a meaningful framework for commemorating personal transformation.
The podcast challenges conventional thinking about recovery activities, emphasizing that while meetings and sponsorship are vital, the true measure of recovery lies in how principles are applied "in our respective homes, occupations and affairs." As one host powerfully states, "God did not get you sober to sponsor men and go to meetings. He did it so you could be a better husband, a godly man in your community." This perspective offers crucial balance for those who might become overly focused on recovery activities at the expense of family responsibilities.
Perhaps most moving is the reflection on celebrating a third sobriety birthday with family photos on the beach—a moment that would have been lost forever with just one more drink. This poignant realization captures why recovery matters: not simply to abstain from substances, but to reclaim our place in the lives of those we love. Even with years of sobriety, the journey continues through emotional challenges that require ongoing spiritual growth and surrender.
Whether you're contemplating recovery, newly sober, or have years of sobriety, this conversation offers honest perspective on what it means to choose life beyond addiction. Connect with us at recoveryunfilteredpodcast@gmail.com to share your own recovery milestone moments.
Thank You for Joining Us.. Please share with friends. If you or anyone you know is struggling with alcoholism please reach out to us. We can get you help. recoveryunfilteredpodcast@gmail.com
We'll see you next time. I can't tell you what it is.
Speaker 2:You can never ask. You will also be offended. So if you are easily offended, just pass us by this podcast is not for you.
Speaker 1:Our opinions are just that. If you don't agree with what we're saying, that's okay. We're going to love you anyways. We are not in any way affiliated with AA.
Speaker 2:So sit back, grab a beverage of your choice and get ready.
Speaker 1:Let's go. Oh, rob, jesus, rob, rob, rob, rob, rob Rob.
Speaker 2:Know what that sounds like, hey, so. I sent something to the men's group prior to the end of our last podcast. You got a new nickname because I'm watching.
Speaker 1:Oh God.
Speaker 2:Because I asked you and if you're out there listening, I'm going to give you a visual. You know, in the movies and stuff where you see people's heart rate, they're in the hospital, they're going to die, and then the thing goes flat line, right when Larry's recorded. I can see a graph, you know. There's a straight line and then the squiggly lines going up and down.
Speaker 1:It's called the audiophile. The audiophile, it's the audio wave.
Speaker 2:When someone's talking, mine is basically a flat line, mostly. Larry's is like 15 fucking heartbeats going in your heart flat jabber, jaw that's you remember that old hand? Of our barrel cartoon. Hey, that's better than your sound a little softer.
Speaker 1:Yeah, a little softer hey, what's happening?
Speaker 2:rob, welcome back how you doing, what are we doing? What are you doing today?
Speaker 1:uh, well, we are. It's all about larry again today.
Speaker 2:I love it you know at least, hey, at least I'm comfortable with that.
Speaker 1:I'm familiar with that you know it's and I apologize to the listeners, but you know it was not supposed to be two episodes of All About Larry, but it is.
Speaker 2:I wanted to only get one clarification on, because what we talked about last time and I wanted to bring this Sponsorship Yep Right, but there's another word for that.
Speaker 2:Hit me If you are okay, if you have a higher power than we have. A Christian would call that discipleship, because Jesus didn't say go ye into the world and make converts. Nope, he said go ye into the world and make disciples. So what that means is you take a man as your discipleship and then, once that say the steps are over, then you walk alongside that man, yes sir, as you lead and guide, and that's discipleship. Yep 101.
Speaker 1:And that's what we do. Yeah, and that's what we do. So, if you're a Christian it's called discipleship.
Speaker 2:In AA it's called sponsorship.
Speaker 1:It's the same thing.
Speaker 2:Same thing. You're leading someone to an outcome.
Speaker 1:So I recently celebrated my third year.
Speaker 2:Third year Right, and I wanted to talk about that.
Speaker 1:Sobriety, sobriety, sobriety, baby Words matter. I know, I know I've been, that's trust me. That's come up quite a bit, even at work recently. Um, and I wanted to talk about that a little bit because a lot of people get confused. Well, people, people outside of a, like my family, and you know, I, I made a nice big post on Facebook because, you know, april 10th was the day that I decided to go go to Maynard's. That's the day I decided to I that my family was more important to me than the alcohol, right, and I wanted to start living life again. And so April 10th is a very um, and so April 10th is a very um. It's not a, it's not the day of my sobriety, but it is the day that I said no, right. It's the day that I walked to the edge of that sidewalk and looked over the edge going down.
Speaker 1:There is freedom, nobody nagging at me enough pain right, I'm looking over the edge and I and you know and I, that's this pet tattoo on the back of my arm. It says where the sidewalk ends, and that's I looked over that edge and I just remember leaning up against that, the kitchen, the kitchen counter, and I'm looking out the window and when Pat didn't answer that phone call I had, I was literally. I can remember that decision in my mind, like it literally is happening right now. It's how vivid it is to me, right. So that moment still relives, so like it's right now. And that the two or three weeks leading up to that period is I remember where.
Speaker 2:I was at it was usually the worst.
Speaker 1:Oh, from February, from about February 15th right around in there, when I was in a conference in Vegas, till that till that April 10th day that I was supposed to be at my grandson's baseball game and I chose alcohol over that and and the whole two weeks I just I just live it. It's like I'm living in that pain again and I, you know, for the first year, the first year I went through that. It was brutal. I'm like what is going on? No obsession to drink, no, never. But it was just that pain was just real, but it was that, that, um, just like I don't know reliving it.
Speaker 1:And when I talked to people you know for sure, and and you know, and I started thinking about that and wanting to talk to other people about it, hey, do you remember doing this, do you remember doing that? And you know a lot of most of the people that I spoke to in AA and you know people that have that, and I don't talk to 12, 14, 15, 20 year guys. I've been talking to people you know four, five, six, seven, eight, those ones that you know. To me that's, and to me it affected me.
Speaker 2:That right, and I just wanted june 1st to get over. There's a game closer. Oh yeah, the end of may, right, which was terrible, right. All I wanted because june 1st is my sobriety all I wanted was that day to get here right and over. So, okay, I've done it.
Speaker 1:Unlike our belly button birthday right, I don't give a shit about that one, but not anymore, I don't but unlike our belly button birthday, we're excited for it to get there so we can celebrate our birthday, blah, blah, blah, and eventually I'll probably get to that point I did.
Speaker 2:I mean now, it doesn't.
Speaker 1:No, and it's just another day, but for three, four, five years I had that.
Speaker 2:And then it bothered me at first Like did I do something wrong?
Speaker 1:And then the second year it happened.
Speaker 2:Okay, now I've talked to Jay. And third year, okay, I get this. I get this now and I'm grateful for it because I want to be able to hold it, because if I forget that shit, I might repeat that shit and I tell people that. So remember that shit yeah that pain is real, it will lessen.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but I want to commemorate that almost every year that April 10th like I said that you know and everybody when I made the post the 12th is your sobriety day, Right, right. So when I made the post on facebook about that day, I said in there, very I thought I said was this is the day that I made the decision at the end of the sidewalk to choose my family.
Speaker 2:What I was told by maynards is don't let him stop drinking until he's able to get my wife and I did the same thing you did I gave gave my phone to my wife. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Two fifths so. So everybody asks I? So? I have a clock on my arm that says April. You know, april 12th 2022, at 2 36 AM, cause I was standing in front of my toolbox. Why I was still hiding my whiskey in my toolbox is beyond me, but that's where it was at. Yeah, I sat in my garage at 2 36 and took my last drink. That's my sobriety day, april 12th, 2.36 am. But the day that you know and I'm going to read something in here to where I'm not changing my sobriety day, that's always going to be April 12th, but I'm going to read something.
Speaker 2:It's actually your first day of continuous sobriety, right, right something.
Speaker 1:it's actually your first day of continuous sobriety, right right, that's my first day without alcohol. Perfect, well, I shouldn't say that, because that's in the morning, right that's the first day that that's the day that I you took your last drink, took my last drink, right so?
Speaker 2:I mean whether you want to be able to 12 fucking hard some people say it should be the 13th probably.
Speaker 1:But I ain't doing, I'm not having a celebration too, damn it. I'm not changing the celebration to the 13th of the fucking month.
Speaker 2:Anyways, that's a bad day. No, it's not born on the 13th December 13th, it's my birthday, belly button.
Speaker 1:That explains a lot.
Speaker 2:Nothing wrong with that. 13th is a great number.
Speaker 1:My sister was born on the 12th, anyway. So I want to talk about a little bit about that, because if I'm suffering, there's other people suffering right, what are you going to read to me?
Speaker 1:so the a celebration is the alcoholics anonymous, is an. A birthday, also known as a sobriety birthday or sober anniversary, marks a dated person stopped drinking and began sober, began their recovery journey. It signifies the start of a new life free from the effects of alcohol and in a significant milestone in the recovery. The elaboration a little bit meaning a birthday is personal date chosen by a member to mark the day they decided to quit drinking and embark on the recovery journey, leads. This leads me to the question. That's not accurate. Okay, right, because the 10th is the day I stopped.
Speaker 2:I decided I was going to get help, but the last, your first day of sobri, decided I was going to get help, but the last, your first day of sobriety, of your first complete, because technically you drank the morning of the 12th, right. So your sobriety technically would be because that's the day the 12th, right, your first full day of continuous sobriety would be the 13th, see, because may 31st was my last drunk, right? Well, I'm not drunk, but the last time when they, when. Last time when Maynard said I was already sober for two days, right, drying out on the couch sweating like a dog shit in peach seeds anyway.
Speaker 1:And they told you and they told you to drink well, they told my wife where they go.
Speaker 2:How's your shakes? I said how do you think they are right? Well, your bed's ready. Can you come up and back up here, right? So I had my phone to Bonnie and said hey, and Bonnie goes. You want me to do? She didn't cut. She says you want me to. She says you want me to fucking do what? She goes. I just spent two days with him drying out. She goes. You could have killed your husband.
Speaker 1:You're not, not you but your husband could have died Right, and I've dried out before.
Speaker 2:So I was like baby, off to the liquor store you go.
Speaker 1:That's a miserable, that's the most miserable thing to go through.
Speaker 2:That's why I say this and that didn't help a bit.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:I was so where I was at, because I remember my story alcohol stopped working, basically Right. So when I drank that I didn't feel a thing. But I drank it May 31st. That's why June 1st is my first complete day of sobriety. That's my sobriety date, cause I drank May 31st. That was my last drink or drug or anything I've ever done to change the way I feel, because I have lost the right to uh, uh, emotional or mental, um, oh damn, what's the word now? Keep going.
Speaker 1:I just effed it up. So you guys heard that rob told me to start talking.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I did oh, I have lost the right to chemical peace of mind right any chemical right, peace of mind yeah that you know that goes back to me before you're sober, so that goes back right that's why I say that that goes back to right.
Speaker 1:That's why I say that that goes back to like when I have to do. You know, like I said, I've had multiple, multiple surgeries since I've been out, since I've been recovered and I've had to go through the pain medication, all that stuff A lot of. I've had morphine, liquid morphine, go through cancer and they say, so many people relapse when they get on that because of that, and I was so petrified Because they're not spiritually fit.
Speaker 2:Right, right, right I mean going back to that same thing. Brotherhood and sponsorship comes in when we're going through that. Oh yeah, that's there.
Speaker 1:I mean it's tough to navigate, yeah I remember you guys telling me one day in a group get your ass back on that pain medication take it.
Speaker 2:If you're in pain, right and take it.
Speaker 1:Oh, I was fucking miserable because in the worst case scenario.
Speaker 2:this is what my wife told me, because I was trying to get off the pain medication early from cause I'm dishonest, going through cancer, and I was on Dilaudid, which is a kick ass, and then liquid morphine. I mean neither one really. They did all right, you know what I mean. Just anyway, pain is crazy. But she said I would rather you get hooked on this to get you to, let's get you through cancer.
Speaker 1:Survive that she wanted you to survive.
Speaker 2:If I got to send you to rehab again, did?
Speaker 1:you get through all this.
Speaker 2:We'll do that. But, you know, there's a few moments where I was wanting to get off it just for that fear. And we don't make a decision based on fear, nope. Because, that's the opposite of faith and that's what I was doing when I got cancer on that Clear, clean. Yeah, take the pain pill if you need it.
Speaker 1:Right, no, and I did. Don't take it if you don't. Yeah, but be better, rank, damn sure you got.
Speaker 2:And have some accountability Right.
Speaker 1:Have some accountability. Make sure your sponsor is talking to you.
Speaker 2:Make sure, or your wife husband?
Speaker 1:No, it is, and I think we need to dig into that a lot at some point. Celebration here's another one. Many AA members choose to celebrate their AA birthday annually, often with a cake and blah, blah, blah. Significance AA birthday is a reminder of the individual's commitment to sobriety and journey towards a new life. I disagree with that. Why Read that again, would you say? The AA birthday is a reminder of the individual's commitment to sobriety and the journey towards a new life.
Speaker 2:Okay, but I thought the first thing I thought you let off was the celebration of that, because what I believe AA birthdays are about not for me, because my sponsor, because I'd go to primary purpose he goes hey, where else are you Like one, two, three or sober? He goes. Where else are you going to get your coin? Jay goes hey, where else are you Like one, two, three or so? He goes. Where else are you going to get your coin? I said this is my home group.
Speaker 1:He said no.
Speaker 2:He goes, you go get them. This is your month. You go to every fellowship you can, because it's not about you. Young man, show these other people who are two days, three days, that this works.
Speaker 1:I have a problem with that. I have a problem with that.
Speaker 2:I said go get them everywhere so you show them that the program works.
Speaker 1:You know those chips.
Speaker 2:And I believe he's right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, those chips that you get there and this is just a tradition that I don't know if Rob does this or who, if it's just you, but it's just me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I love it, right, because Rob gives me a special chip every year and Doug and I get my guys using special chips, because it means, because I appreciate you right and because when you're getting a two year, three year, four year, five year me right, that's just one. It validates that god is. Look at the work god has done right and it's it's yeah and it's an honor for that. You chose me right and god allowed me to do that. It's an honor for me, so why? That's the least I can do I uh, so I got katie.
Speaker 1:So what? Normally what I've done because you've given me my chip every, every time is I'll take, um, I'll take katie, I'll take the chip I get from primary and I'll give it to katie and I'll take yours and I put it in my book and I carry that one katie carries. Oh, by the way, june.
Speaker 2:Uh, hold on hold on. What day would give me? Open up june, dad huh, open, open up June. I'm going to beat you there. It's the third Fridays. The 20th of June is the third Friday. You're giving me my chip of primary purpose, all right.
Speaker 1:I'll be more than happy to do that.
Speaker 2:It's going to be you or Nathan, and since we brought it up right here, thank you, that's always a privilege.
Speaker 1:But Katie carries my, my, the chip that I get from she's.
Speaker 2:She's got my one two. That's kind of cool actually.
Speaker 1:Yeah, she's got my one, two and three. Bonnie always gives me a special, does she? Yeah, that's pretty cool Since you're three.
Speaker 2:I believe, since you're three, I believe she's Take a guess at what I've done with those chips. You frame them. No, what, if you know me? What have I? If you have, what have I? I mean, I've got like I go to the fellowships too, so I'll get the, not the plain ones, but then you know the nice, no, the ones you get, but the nice ones that she's given me, except for, I think, like 14 and 12. What I've given them away to it back, yeah, giving it back. She goes hey, you repurposed it. I know she was, uh, I was looking for chips. She goes where's your three through six and six through, you know, and six through 11? And I like, well, jason got that one, uh, joseph got that one, david got that you repurpose, and some of the nice chips, you know, they just ain't, I know.
Speaker 1:But see my, my whole goal is to. I want to make a clock with mine. Jeanette did that or no?
Speaker 2:no, Jeanette, she had a plaque Right.
Speaker 1:I mean a nice display, she's got a nice plaque, One through 40.
Speaker 2:She goes this is what 40 years of sobriety looks like.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I want to make a clock all the way to 12. Smooth as hell, Right. So I mean, I got a good start on it. I could.
Speaker 1:you're a knucklehead anyways so that's what I mean, like I said, I want to talk about that a little bit. Um, this is probably going to be a short one today on this one because, like I said, we we're going to bring back mike and kim on this next one and I have no idea what's going on with my recording here. Are we still recording? Yeah, we are, I'm recording down here.
Speaker 2:I wanted to share one thing. I was talking to bonnie about this and and this is something that really helps Brandon out and I've shared it to men's group a couple of times and and I even shared last Thursday, because when you get in here and I'm, and when you get into the rooms of AA and I know, okay, you know, when you get into the rooms, when you get into this life, right, this way of living gone overboard, you know, oh, yeah, remember brandon saying god, he does something every day. So, and I and I've shared this and this is you know, and I want to share. Anyway, listen, here you go. Uh, well, we'll start.
Speaker 2:On page 19 it says, uh, this is, there is a solution. We, uh, we feel the elimination of our drinking is but a beginning, a much more. Well, let me go back up, start. None of us make a sole vocation of this work sponsorship, sponsorship, nothing. Nor do we think it's a fact. This is the beginning of the book. Nor do we think its effectiveness would increase if we did. We feel the elimination of our drinking is but a beginning. A much more important demonstration of our principles lies before us in our respective homes, occupations and affairs. So what was Bill saying right there yeah, you know, helping people is important, right, going to meetings and being, you know, the newcomer, great Right. But a much more important demonstration of our principles should be in our homes. Yep, our jobs Thousand percent and our lives Thousand percent. Now, if you don't believe that, let's go to page 127. Here we go.
Speaker 2:Loves to repeat himself, and which I love to just drive it home. It says here. Since the home has suffered more than anything else, it is well that we think a man exert himself there. He is not likely to get far in any direction If he fails to show on selfishness and love under his own roof, in the home. So what I tell the guys? I tell people when they start man Rob, you know, I understand you don't want to let the life that he has given you get in the way of your life, right. But God didn't and I'm going to use I'm not even use the F word, but I want to emphasize this God did not get you blankly, blank and sober to sponsor men and go to meetings. He better husband, a godly man, a godly man in your community, at your employment. Yes, go to meetings to give back, to receive strength, get your brotherhood, but then your job is to give that away, yep.
Speaker 2:Yep, and that's more important so you don't need to go to meetings five days a week. If you want to do that, that's fine if you have the time for that. But remember, a much more important demonstration of our principles should be displayed in our homes, our workplace, the grocery store, gas station in our lives.
Speaker 1:Thousand percent, that's where it's at, and I just had this conversation with somebody the other day that I know who it was. It was on my third speaking of birthdays Hold on.
Speaker 2:You never told me that name what. You were getting ready to sponsor this young man here recently and some guy walked up, started talking about sponsorship. But you're like motherfucker, don't choose him. I'm not gonna say it.
Speaker 1:Now we're recording again. Fool, remind me your old ass forgot. I know I want that name.
Speaker 1:That's funny. Um, it doesn't matter and I want that name anyways. Uh, so for the one of the things I wanted to do so we've had, I got this photographer. Her name is Jocelyn and I'm going to get her name of her, her studio, right now, because she's an amazing, she's awesome, Love her to death. She's been. She did my oldest daughter's, she did my oldest daughter's engagement pictures and then she did her it's joshlyn daniel photos is her name, is who it is joshlyn daniel photos and um. So she did miranda and eric's uh engagement and then she did miranda and eric's um wedding and then when Everly, my new granddaughter, was born, she did her newborn pictures and then she did Pat and McKenna's engagement pictures and she's going to eventually do their wedding pictures. So when I was coming up, it was about I don't know, beginning of March and I was like you know what? We haven't had family pictures done since my kids were. Probably it's been at least 10 years since we've had any kind of family pictures.
Speaker 1:I'm not going to tell you how long it's been for us Get it done. Brother, you need to schedule it. I'll give you Jocelyn's number. Give me your number.
Speaker 2:You're right.
Speaker 1:We need to do this. You need to because that's going to be gone and pretty soon it's going to be not just the four of seven, eight, nine. You need to get it done, trust me. And um, so I hit. So I said do you have an opening April 12th? She goes yeah, I do, and I go good, because I want to take. I want you been a part of this so far. I want you to be a part of this. And she was excited about anyways. So we went and had family pictures done on my birthday over in San Francisco, down on the beach, beautiful day, beautiful time. It was awesome. Well, she sent me the first proof yesterday of and she had the whole family hugging on me and staring at me. Oh, my God, what a precious moment. And I still look at that and go. I was one drink away from missing that, right there, and that's why we do it. That's why we do it, that's why I brought that up Right, and that's why we do it.
Speaker 2:That's why we do it.
Speaker 1:That's why I brought that up Right, because no matter what we do, the picture of Nathan and his family. Oh my God. That's why I said beautiful.
Speaker 2:That's why we do beautiful Right. I mean the whole story, that goes behind that.
Speaker 1:Oh God, that's what. That's why we do. That's just when I looked at it someone on know, what he's got more sobriety than me. But what did he do? He kind of went into a little bit of dry spell Right and then but now and now we're on the jujitsu mat together.
Speaker 2:It's awesome.
Speaker 1:I mean, and watching his light come on, it's getting brighter and brighter and brighter, right and you know, same thing lights me up. I mean it's it's so fun and, like I said, he was on, he was on the podcast.
Speaker 2:I mean he, no, he wouldn't. But look, but again, again to the listeners, the, the, the things that God will do once you really give it to him by, by sacrificing self and ego and getting into this work and saying here, Lord, here's my life, open to you, what can you, what will you do with it? And let him do it. And Nathan's just like hey, whatever God wants, Rob, I'm good, and he means it. And when you just see it, God, that's what gives me the juice.
Speaker 1:Me too, watching, and, like I said, when I was this this last past week, I was working through some stuff and I just the anxiety and the and and you know the Katie was you okay, you okay, yeah, I'm good. I just I got to work through this. You know it's several things working through that. One I never had an obsession to drink, never, anytime I think a drink would solve any of it. Number two you know it worked, helped me work through, you know, turning it over to God and and we're growing up spiritually.
Speaker 1:But it's such as you know, when people look at me and say, well, you got to turn it over to God, I want to punch him in the mouth.
Speaker 2:Right, you going to punch him in the mouth. Right, you're working through it, I'm working through it, I'm doing it.
Speaker 1:Don't do you know that? It's just not that easy for some people. Some people say they can just turn it over and walk away from. I can't. I, my personality is different, it's good, but you're, I'll let go of it and regrab it again, Right, I do it all the time and I'm like I can still do it. I, God, show me the path to work through this. But that's the beautiful part of spiritual growth. And you know what finally helped Working with Blake yesterday.
Speaker 2:Getting out of self and stuff like that always, oh dude.
Speaker 1:I was going to tell you.
Speaker 2:And I've shared this before. I mean, I'm as big a pig sober as I am drunk. You know I get you. And that's Bonnie. She goes because she'd be. We were coming home from breakfast this morning from my garden cafe. Very good, they don't sponsor the show, but anyway she goes. I love when you come home on Wednesdays and Fridays and you beat up from the wrestling, from the jujitsu mat with Logan and the boys. You know she was in the relationship you have with your son I used to be jealous of, you know, junior high he went your way, you know. But seeing that and she goes and she goes, it's the same thing, rob, the same excitement you have when you come off. You know you're coming off the mat, you're coming home even though you're baby get the you know, get the essence already coming.
Speaker 2:You know cause I'm? I'm out to scrapping with and I'm scrapping, I'm kicking ass.
Speaker 1:I can imagine Kicking ass.
Speaker 2:I need to done. You you're working with, so you've taken something. The fourth step or the fifth step, you've heard there. You come telling me all about it shows. You're just lit up. It's the same way, so it's the same. You know that same. You know when we truly were chasing something with booze and drugs or whatever, absolutely one thousand percent.
Speaker 1:That one I do too, the lights come I do too. I love it talking about god and the spirits just fired you up and I do the same thing when I work through this podcast, when, when I'm doing the editing, when I'm working through the messages that are coming in, I just I get fired up for it. But you know what I still get. I get those emotional dumps too, because and do you get those? We're human, oh, absolutely.
Speaker 2:Do you get them?
Speaker 1:You were a little bit on the downside. When I talked to you the other morning you said you were tired. Oh, I got something going.
Speaker 2:You're physically tired and you're mostly tired, both, both. That's brutal. That's brutal when you, when your body's no matter what, because I work out, you know, I train, and then I go train and I teach wrestling, and then I right, and then and then I got something going on every day of the week. Yes, when your body's wore out, but your mind is sharp, you can still function, oh yeah.
Speaker 1:But when your mind is shot, I don't care, or you're mostly shot. It doesn't matter what your body's like, your body's shutting down, it doesn't matter, you're done.
Speaker 2:Your body's saying nope. Yeah, I was, I was and I you know. But when Tuesday's opened, I'm not throwing nothing on Tuesdays Good for you, that's a free day, good for you. Thursday in June my commitment to the big book study.
Speaker 1:Is it up Is done? Are you going to get all the way through the 164? Yeah, probably.
Speaker 2:Are you? Probably We'll be close. Okay, it depends, because we have a lot of. Last week we got through three sentences and we had there was only 16. In there there were 16 people. Small group Maybe that's a big group for a lot of people, but a small group for that meeting. And, dude, we had lively over three sentences. Three sentences, those are fun. At the 11th step, upon awakening, okay, we got through more than three sentences. Three paragraphs Still not much.
Speaker 1:one page, that's awesome.
Speaker 2:I don't know if I'm going to get through it, god knows Right when is it June.
Speaker 1:June 1st. I'll be there June 1st, somewhere in June they're probably going to ask you to stay.
Speaker 2:I'm not doing it Out of boy. Someone else can take it.
Speaker 1:Tuesdays are gonna open up and I'm not feeling it. Yeah, I'm not. I'm not making it. You need a break, dude. You need a break and you know what.
Speaker 2:Though, but like, just like I was saying and I've done, if you want it monday, because wednesdays, you know, when wrestling starts back up from five to six, I'm going to help coach good, six to seven. I'm on the mat getting my butt kicked and I'm kicking butt. But fridays six to seven or then 7 to 8,.
Speaker 1:It's on the mat, and that's. That's you. You need that time.
Speaker 2:But that's as spiritual as it is physical for me. No, and you know what, when you sharpen your, I'm on the mat with my son.
Speaker 1:When you sharpen, you just can't. When you sharpen yourself like that, you're more prepared for everybody else, that's as good as a meeting for and that's where I think, like I said in the previous episode, where I my first two sponsors sponsees, I wasn't nowhere even remotely close to being in the right place to sponsor.
Speaker 2:Hey and I had a this Friday. This is I'm going to brag, so let's say it. I don't give a shit Hit it. I was on, we were on the mat, we're just free. We're here. We're only known from feet to submission and a 21 year old kid. You know, because I can't do nothing, you're just too fucking fast. I was like dude. I'm 52 years old, stage four cancer survivor with a titanium hip. That's the greatest compliment. I've had in five years. You're just too fast, he says that kid needs it.
Speaker 1:I can't believe that come out of his mouth. Well, I'm pretty quick. Yeah, you are. That's funny. All right, Rob. Recovery ontered podcast at gmailcom. That's recovery unfiltered. We've had a lot of technical devil. I have over here my stop recording, so, god, I hope these all come out okay. Well, I'll punch them together somehow. Yeah, god, god, god'll do it, he'll do it. Yeah, god'll do it.
Speaker 2:All right, recovery unfiltered podcast the next thing you'll hear after these two will be kim and Mike Yep.
Speaker 1:Right on, god willing. Recoveryunfilteredpodcastgmailcom. Thank you for joining us today. We hope you learned something today that will help you If you did not come back next week, and we'll try again If you like what we heard, give us a five-star review.
Speaker 2:If you don't like what you heard, kiss my ass. I can't say that, can you? Anyway, if you don't like what you heard, go ahead and tell us that too. We'll see what we can improve. We probably won't change nothing, but do it anyway, thanks, rob.
Speaker 1:Come back next week and hopefully something will be different and something will sink in. Take care, this has been Recovery Unfiltered, thank you.