Doing It With The Daniels Podcast
Welcome to ‘Doing It With The Daniels’! This is where we show couples how to GET-IT-ON in life, marriage, AND ministry! 🚀
Doing It With The Daniels Podcast
New Year, New Us: Resolutions for Lasting Love
Unlock the secrets to a thriving partnership as we, Charles and Tisa Daniels, guide you through setting meaningful relationship resolutions. Discover how transforming traditional individual resolutions into shared couple goals can enrich your bond, whether you’re reflecting on past victories and challenges or charting a new path forward. Explore practical strategies for keeping resolutions alive and making them a powerful tool for relationship empowerment and growth.
Ever wondered how to keep the spark alive amid life’s myriad responsibilities? We delve into the art of maintaining romance in marriage, offering insights into understanding and honoring each other's love languages. Prioritizing acts of service, quality time, and open communication can keep love vibrant and prevent your relationship from drifting into routine. We also address the often daunting topic of financial planning, sharing personal stories that highlight the importance of joint decision-making for a harmonious and united front.
Lastly, embark on a journey toward a healthier lifestyle that strengthens not only your body but also your connection as a couple. From introducing new habits to balancing differing preferences, we emphasize the significance of teamwork, compromise, and mutual support. Join us in cultivating a community where you can share ideas and seek advice, as we commit to supporting your relationship growth throughout the new year. Don’t miss the chance to bolster your marriage and life together with these actionable insights.
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So, whatever the deficits are, whatever our goals are, whatever the challenges are, they're ours together, not yours. Yeah, it's mine Right, welcome to Doing it With the Dales, the podcast where we navigate life, marriage and ministry. I'm Charles.
Speaker 2:And I'm Tisa. Join us as we share insights, wisdom and practical advice to strengthen your marriage, empower your life and enrich your ministry.
Speaker 1:Let's dive in together and discover the joys of doing it with the Daniels. Hey, welcome to Doing it With the Daniels, where we help couples get it on in life marriage and ministry how you guys doing today.
Speaker 2:We are back.
Speaker 1:We're back. Happy New Year. Happy New Year. Yes, it's a new year, new day, new time. And we're back. We want to share with you. We've been MIA for a minute.
Speaker 2:For a minute, for a lot. Yeah, we had a lot going on, had a lot, we had to take a break. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Different changes and transitions have taken place that we will be sharing with you throughout this podcast, so definitely stay tuned week to week as we share information with you about what's going on with us, what's been going on and where we're headed. But we're back today for a new episode. I'm excited. I have missed sharing with the people.
Speaker 2:Yeah, me too. Me too, I have really missed doing this podcast.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so it's a great time for us to jump back in and have a good time, yes, so.
Speaker 2:So it's a great time for us to jump back in and have a good time.
Speaker 1:Yes, so you ready? Yeah, what are we talking about today?
Speaker 2:Okay, we're talking about just starting your new year off with your in a relationship, in a marriage, starting your relationship off in the new year. You know, usually everybody does New Year's resolutions and what they want to see in the upcoming year, so that's what we're going to be talking about today.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think the new year is a great time to reflect on the past year the successes, the wins, the losses, the good, the bad and just try to regroup and put things in perspective, even in a relationship. Many people think about it as far as their career is concerned or their family, but how many times do people take the time to sit down and talk about what do we, as a couple, want to accomplish as we go into this new year? You know we talk about a lot of weight loss goals, a lot of exercise goals, dieting habits, a lot of things, but how many times do you sit down and talk about I want to get closer to my spouse this year Right?
Speaker 2:No, I don't think we do. We don't take the time out to do that in a relationship, so I think it's good so you could sit down, talk about individual goals, goals as a couple, what you want to see, and you'll find out some new things about your spouse. When you get to talking about you know what you want to see in the upcoming year.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I don't think couples usually do. I think people tend to think that it's an individual time.
Speaker 2:Right, exactly.
Speaker 1:I'm going to do for me what I need to do for me. Do for you what you need to do for you. And we never really look at together and we're a team.
Speaker 2:Yeah. If we're one and we're unified, then we need to work those, those goals as one unit yeah, and figure out what you want to do together, what you want to accomplish together as a couple 100%.
Speaker 1:So what thing? I mean, we can't tackle everything. No, there's so many things that people deal with. What are we going to tackle? What do we need to share with them? Because I think for us, we didn't wait until the new year. We're in the new year. Some people may feel like, well, I'm behind it, hun, it's already. You know I'm in the new year. When do I? When should I start this? Really, we should start this in the previous year, yeah, towards the previous year, while all of the hustle and bustle of the holidays because you know you hit people celebrate halloween? Obviously, we don't, but they love halloween, thanksgiving, christmas, new year I mean, it's on you before you know it and you can get wrapped up in the holiday season. Yeah and forget, wait a minute, I need to plan for this new year, so, but if you didn't, it's okay. Start now, put things in place and go from there.
Speaker 2:Exactly. And so what we started doing. We started in December talking about what we want to see in 2025 and what we didn't like that happened in 2024. And so what we want to accomplish and do better. So we've already started all that.
Speaker 1:Yeah. So we got a few things we'll go through, just maybe things that you guys can highlight in your life and begin to work on. So what are we looking?
Speaker 2:at. So number one is setting relationship resolutions together.
Speaker 1:Yeah yeah, relationship resolutions that's really good. I like that because I think people have the whole personal resolution yeah but a relationship resolution like what are you going to do this year as a couple? What are you going to work on this year as a couple, what? What's the thing you want to put in place? And I know some people say, oh, I hate resolution. Well, I don't see it as a bad thing. No, I think it's. Instead of using the word resolution, we can use the word go but why do hate it?
Speaker 2:Do you think they hate it because they make this resolution and they don't stick to it?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think they feel like I said something, but I always fail at it.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 1:I don't stick to it. I don't follow through. A lot of other people around us do resolutions. They don't stick to them, yeah, so people think it's pointless, it's a waste of time. I think they only are ineffective when you set them, but you don't set action steps.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Objectives along the way to get you there.
Speaker 2:Exactly Because I've set plenty of resolutions and I probably went so far with them and didn't, you know, follow through the entire year. But you just got to. You got to realize that there are times when you know you may go so long with it and you did. You did that, you did good in in that amount of time. But it's not going to be like you set this resolution for the entire year. Maybe it was for that time set.
Speaker 1:Absolutely.
Speaker 2:And so at least you did it. So you celebrate that, and then you just keep going.
Speaker 1:Yeah, well, let's jump in. Okay. So with the relationship, what kind of things are good when we're talking about setting relationship resolutions or goals in a relationship?
Speaker 2:Go ahead, go ahead, no, you go ahead, no, you go ahead. So it's just brainstorming. It's like what you want to see as a couple together is when you are setting your resolution.
Speaker 1:I think some of those things can include things like better communication. Like, if we think back over the year, well, how much did we argue? And hopefully nobody's keeping count of all the arguments, but when you think about it, did we argue last year? What did we argue about? How can we communicate better to avoid those? I know for us one of the big things we did years ago, when I came home, we began to talk about our communication and how we want to improve that and we start implementing some things around empathy, active listening, better listening skills, and we put those things in practice and it started to minimize the number of disagreements or it. I'll say this it minimized the severity of the disagreements, which means we're going to disagree, it's going to happen, but it doesn't have to go to a bad place. Right, disagreement in marriage, in your relationship, doesn't have to be like an argument, a big blow-up. It can be something that, yeah, we have those, but we also know how to work through them in a healthy way.
Speaker 2:Right, that's good.
Speaker 1:So I think communication is a big key. I think romance we're in romance, something I've been thinking- about for me personally, but it affects our relationship together.
Speaker 1:How romantic am I right don't answer that on camera and but I think about you saw. You saw my mouth. I was getting ready. That's a rhetorical question, but I was thinking about how can I be more romantic in this relationship. What kind of romance does my wife like? Yeah, you know what's my wife's love language? Well, obviously, I know your love language is. You know gifts and acts of service.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Probably more acts of service than gifts. Um, so I had to think about that, like, what kind of stuff does she want me to do?
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:That which I know most of is more cleaning and vacuuming and all the stuff that does not fit into my love language. But if it's romantic to you, then it should be considered even date night.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:You know, I mean, we talked about last night and you know we did get to a certain place. You really have to follow through. I was like let's go on a date, let's go out, let's go out, let's go somewhere. And then, after we got around to it, he was like well, come on, we're going to do it. I was like don't worry about it, let's just relax.
Speaker 2:I. That is good. I think that's a whole different podcast within itself. Talk about romance and date night, because I feel like, as married couples, we go through the mundane as far as just doing life and we don't take the time to really talk to our spouse, because we've changed throughout the years. Talk to them about what they like, what they don't like. How's things going in a marriage? Do you need more romance? You know what am I doing right, what am I doing wrong? Am I not giving you something that you want? Is there something? You know what I'm saying? So I feel like that that's something that really needs to be talked about within the marriage, because I feel like a lot of people are not getting from their spouse what they desire.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and, like you said, it needs to be talked about, it needs to be intentional. Yeah. If people just keep living like, oh, we're married, let's have a great life because we're married, marriage doesn't work like that. You don't wake up to a great marriage.
Speaker 2:Sometimes you just kind of feel like you're roommates and you're just doing life together, especially when you got little kids and kids come into play. So it can really just be like mundane.
Speaker 1:It can get really boring really quick I think you kind of fit in the two. You can fit in the two categories parenting when children come along and paying bills yeah and that's what a lot of people do. They parent and they go to work to pay bills, but they forget about the relationship.
Speaker 1:Yeah and then they look up. You know we've seen many couples I think we mentioned it before how couples get older, their children grow up and then they look at each other like what are we doing? You know, you, what we do. And we decided remember when we had that conversation like we don't want that.
Speaker 2:We don't want to put so much time into our children, so much time in the ministry, so much time into building a life together, that we forget to be together yeah, exactly yeah so, even with this time that you're reflecting on what happened last year, I feel like that is a good conversation that you need to have with your spouse, um it's a reset, yeah yeah, exactly it's what it is yeah, I think it's a good reset to go back and look at what are we doing.
Speaker 1:Are we still focused on why we got married, why we fell in love, like I'm grateful that you and I, even at this stage in our life, we still like have a very strong Love life, romantic life, liking for one, like it's a, it's still very good within our relationship and it's because I think we're intentional and we we focus on that. I think if we start to feel that that fire getting low, we give attention to like hey, we, we need to do something, yeah, yeah it's.
Speaker 1:It's important to do that. So I think this is a good time for couples to reevaluate. Well, how romantic were we in in the last year? How much time did we spend just loving on one another and maintaining our bond and connection?
Speaker 2:how much time did we spend just together? Yeah um doing things.
Speaker 1:Just me and you um all of that yeah and then they started looking and say what we're talking about, what can we do to strengthen that? So, yeah, I think that's a good thing. So they need you need relationship goals. You, you need to talk to your partner, your spouse, and you guys figure out how to continue to build on that relationship, because it doesn't just happen. You're not just going to go through another 12 months and then you'll be back here next year and you'll say, oh, we had a great year, we got close. No, it won't happen like that. You're going to be a father part or you're going to stay the same. And you're going to be a father part, or you're going to stay the same and you're going to be wondering, well, why is our relationship going somewhere you didn't plan for, you didn't set goals, you didn't put things in place to take it where you're trying to take it to yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:So number two what about um financial goals for couples?
Speaker 1:oh, that's a big one I think that's huge.
Speaker 1:Yes, and that's a serious one. I will say this when financial goals are important, are important because you think about what you want to do with your money. But before you come to the table because it can be a sensitive thing Both parties have to agree to come without judgment, embarrassment or blaming, like you really got to come and say this because we're one, yeah. So, whatever the deficits are, whatever our goals are, whatever the challenges are, they're ours together, not yours. It's mine, right, right, it's not a. Yeah, well, your credit score not as good as mine. No, when we go to buy a house, if we buy it together, both of them credit scores are going to be on there. You see what I'm saying? Yeah. Or if I make less money than you, it's not like, oh, you got money and I don't know If.
Speaker 2:I make less money than you.
Speaker 1:It's not like oh you got money and I don't know my money, his money. Right no it's our money. Yeah, we need to work together, right, and so it doesn't need to be. You got a problem? Yeah, oh, we got a problem. So let's talk about it as a unit, as a couple, and let's see how we can improve on whatever those challenges are. Yeah, because if I want to buy a house, I don't need you thinking about buying a new car. Right, we both need to be foes on the house.
Speaker 2:If that's what we're going to do, so that's that one accord that we need to be on. Yes, we need to definitely be on one accord. And I can remember in our marriage where some things kind of went down and you were like, ok, I'm putting us on the strict budget. And you came in and you was like we're not spending no money on nothing because we got to pay these bills off. And I was like I'm thinking, ok, so how does this affect me?
Speaker 1:And so it was really not thinking about me.
Speaker 2:It affected me because I couldn't go to the nail shop anymore, I couldn't go to the beauty shop. I mean, we were like on a real strict budget and I think it was. It was tough to for you to have to just come in and just kind of just all of a sudden do that, and we didn't talk about you know anything. It's like okay, I'm the head, this is what we need to do, and I understood why we needed to do that, because we were just in a place where we needed we were trying to pay off some debt.
Speaker 2:Pay off some debt uh-huh, and so we had so much to go to the grocery store, so much to do this. So I mean, everything was like budgeted. I think you came in with like a spreadsheet yeah, every dollar was like whoa what is this? And so it kind of took me off guard. I was taken back a little bit, but I complied.
Speaker 1:I didn't like it, but how long did it last? It didn't last long. It didn't last long. And the reason it didn't last long is exactly what we're talking about. It wasn't a shared goal, it was a shared. We both wanted the same thing, but the route to get there, we didn't do that together. No, I wasn't including. It wasn't including I did. I'll just I was. I think I was at work one day at my desk and I'm just yeah, we can pay bills. I just gotta go do it. And okay, we, just all we. These are the essentials of life and I I didn't think about I'm married to a woman you did not think I didn't think about hair and nails and anything you need.
Speaker 1:I wasn't thinking about any of that. I was like, okay, well, here's what I need, I don't need. Okay, I get a haircut every two weeks. Okay, ain't worry about that, we'll figure that out. We need food, we need gas. We ain't going shopping Clothes going to have to last. The children of Israel had the same clothes for 40 years. God let the clothes it was just crazy.
Speaker 2:It was crazy. But you remember even, uh, I was washing my own hair and then you were like rolling my hair. Uh, you know we got pictures, uh, back in the day. I mean, you were like you're literally trying to roll my hair, yeah, um, because we were just on this strict budget and I was trying to go with it, I was like this is yeah, but it didn't last long because it and it, it came to an end once you came like this is yeah, but it didn't last long because it and it.
Speaker 1:It came to an end once. You came to me and said because you tried it first you did not, you didn't argue, complain about it, but after it was like man, you didn't consider me at all in this and you came, you shared that with me. It was like I can't get my hair done, I can't go get my nails done, I there are things I want to do. I sit back back and I was like you're right, I think. At first I was saying I was just fine.
Speaker 2:I couldn't do without that, but my, that was a struggle.
Speaker 1:And I think after that we kind of loosened up. I was like you know what We'll get there, but it doesn't have to be this tight.
Speaker 2:So we made some adjustments. That's why you have to do it together. I think that when you did it it was kind of one-sided. It was very one-sided.
Speaker 1:It was very one-sided. I was just thinking about the goal, but not thinking about life. Right that we got to keep living life, and there are things that are necessary as we march towards that goal.
Speaker 2:And we eventually got there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, we got there and we did it together. Yeah, and that was the thing. We did it together so we could celebrate together and nobody was put in a bad place in getting here. Actually, I think when you were included in it and we did it together, it made it even better for me and less stressful for me in trying to get the goal, because you had strategies that helped us manage the money and spend the money better, and even what I was trying to do, I'm just like a really focused person. I'm like, no, let's hurry up and get to take this, put it all here and we'll figure out the rest of this. And you're like, no, if we adjust the budget, do the finances this way. Just those strategies helped us get to the same goal. But it wasn't stressful, it wasn't, it wasn't arduous on us as a family or a couple.
Speaker 2:And that's what I was going to say If you work together, both of you guys have strengths that you can kind of build from or use in situations like this, and so you had yours and I had mine. Put them together, it worked well.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:But when you just did yours by yourself it didn't really work well.
Speaker 1:Trying to do it for everybody.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you were trying to figure it out for all of us.
Speaker 1:And, yeah, that wasn't good. So I think, when it comes to finances, couples need to sit down, look at your money, look at how you spent your money last year, what you want to do different. What are your goals for this year? Do you want to buy a home? Make that a goal. Then develop a plan. Like you cannot.
Speaker 1:If your resolution or your goal is, yeah, we're gonna buy a home this year and that's all you do, you're probably not gonna buy a home this year, right, that's, you made a declaration, but you don't have action steps, right, follow, like we talk about, faith without works is dead. So faith is we go. We want to buy a home, but what action steps are following? Buying the home, what home do you want? How much does it cost? How much down payment do you need? Uh, is there any type of assistance that you can get with that down payment assistance or any other assistance? Those are things you need to strategically start to map out and look at. Here's what we want to do. Here's where we want to live. Here's what it's going to cost. Here's what we're going to need. Here's how we're going to save to get it if we don't have it yeah, you said both parties be invested in that process.
Speaker 1:Yes, together if we need to pull back, here's what we're going to pull back on, without stressing the family, so that we can accomplish this goal. Do we need to sell something? Sell a vehicle, sell general items around the house that you don't use? Clear out your attic, sell stuff in the attic that you don't need, don't want, hadn, hadn't touched in a year? You got to think about all of that. It's just a goal. Whatever goal you choose to apply, you set that goal in motion, yeah, and you keep working towards and trust God in the process, and you may not know if your goal is going to work, if it's going to get you all the way to the plan, but that's where God comes in. You pray and you ask God to help you with that goal and he'll step in and intervene and, and you know, do miraculous things along the way, and we've seen him do that plenty of times.
Speaker 1:When we just started, yeah, and God showed up and helped us as we went forward.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's good. All right, so you ready for number three.
Speaker 1:I'm ready.
Speaker 2:Number three is health and wellness as a team.
Speaker 1:Yes, I think in the age we live in now, health is a big deal Right, how we, how we take care of ourselves, and as you get older, it becomes even more important. If you want to be around a little bit longer and you want to live longer, you have to think about exercise and dieting. I think those are two main things. So what type of things do you think are important as far as goals when it comes to health and wellness?
Speaker 2:So I was getting ready to say I'm going to use this as an example. So, health and wellness, I feel like for me, when I started to learn about certain things about foods and different things that were bad and different things that were good I really couldn't come to you and tell you about what I learned because you'd be like oh, you know, I don't want that. You know, it's kind of setting your ways, and a lot of men are when they like something, they like something. They don't want you to change what they're eating. And so what I had to do was I just had to just buy it, use it and then afterwards you ate it and they'll tell you, oh, this is such and such, such and such.
Speaker 2:And you was like what you know? And he was like oh, okay, wasn't that bad? And so I had to use those type of tools to get you to get on this health journey that I was on, even when I started changing our milk, you remember that at first. So I was trying to tell them hey, I need y'all to start drinking this milk. Y'all was like I don't want to drink, I'm not drinking it. So I was buying two different milks at one time and then I was like okay, one time we ran out of the regular milk, the milk that you guys were drinking.
Speaker 1:The whole milk or 2%.
Speaker 2:I think it was 2%, it was 2%, and it was just my milk in there and I was like, well, y'all just got to use it. And so y was like, ok, so that's how y'all transition from that. But I just realized that I find different things and I just implement them and I tell you later and then you're OK with it. And so sometimes, as a couple, you can't just try to put it on them and tell them yeah, I found this new healthy. You just kind of got to give it to them. Just give it to them, let them eat it, and then tell them afterwards, well, just ate this, this, this, this and this. And they'd be like, for real, oh, what is that? So that's the way I had to do for you, because if I come in you telling you stuff, you just be like I don't want that yeah, I kind of like what I like, and changing it up is kind of what you changing it for?
Speaker 1:If it ain't broke, don't fix it. But we need to make some good changes and as we have embraced those changes, it's been for our good and I'm glad we did. We should have done it sooner but hey, I had to get on board with it. But I'm glad we made those changes and I think that's a good thing for couples and we're still making changes.
Speaker 1:Absolutely. I think couples should talk about that. What changes need to be made to be healthy, live longer, healthier lives when you're young is not as important to a lot of people. Is not as important to a lot of people, but I do think this generation, this younger generation, is starting to focus more on the health than we may have when we were a lot younger.
Speaker 2:I will say that it is better now that you're on board. It was hard when I was trying to do it by myself.
Speaker 1:That togetherness of you.
Speaker 2:It's a big deal. Togetherness is a big deal because I was buying certain things in the house and I was still trying to buy certain things for you, and it was like a difference and I'm like, oh, if he would just get on board with this, I wouldn't have to do all this. And so now that you're on board, I hope you're like really on board, semi on board, all trying to come all the way on board. Uh, but you're doing better. Um, now it's easier. Yeah, so no, I'm on board.
Speaker 1:I mean just, I'm not gonna like, I'm on board. I mean I'm not going to like everything, I'm not going to like it, but I'm on board with a lot of what we do because I mean it's healthier. I want to be healthier and that's our goal as a family. And I think if that's the goal, then those couples have to work on putting those things in place, building that routine in their life of being healthy. I mean, as you get older, this is where the older cry as you get older, if you want everything to keep working and you want to be able to enjoy all the activities you would like to enjoy.
Speaker 1:You need to take care of yourself, because if you don't, you're going to be looking around like life ain't as fun as it used to be, but it's because you eating bad, you're not exercising and all that. So I think it's important to look at exercise goals, look at eating habits and make adjustments as a couple, because it'll be beneficial to both of you.
Speaker 2:Even as exercise goes. You know, I was going to the Y and I was doing my exercise and I would try to pull you in. Then I found another place to go do exercise with. I will say, you were a team player when you would come with me to exercise and I really enjoyed that. But I guess you couldn't hang, so you had to kind of find your old thing.
Speaker 1:You know what you like to do and I like to do two different things, so, but you did it. I think when you did it you enjoyed it. Well, I'll tell you what I enjoy. I enjoy doing it with you and that's one of the things I was going to suggest maybe doing exercise goals together, kind of like we talked about. Maybe we'll exercise together once a week and it won't be necessary for the exercise, it'll be for the bonding and the time together. So that's what I was thinking about like how can I spend that time wherever? Because she really enjoys what she does? I don't, but if I endure it for one day, it's fun, it's, it's well. I like to see you in them, yoga pants or whatever kind of pit that I'm like. Go girl.
Speaker 2:You're coming in with the wrong thing.
Speaker 1:Hey, it's working. So I mean it's togetherness. It is togetherness. It's me and you, nobody else. We're doing our workout.
Speaker 2:But you did go to a couple classes with me. I did yeah, but did you enjoy it?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I mean, I don't remember it. It like I was there for you, so I enjoyed being there with you, but it wasn't that bad. No, it wasn't bad okay it was bad, but I think if we plan that out and we have an understanding like that's what we're gonna do, we're gonna do it together. I think it'll be a lot of fun so should couples work out together if they want.
Speaker 1:If they want I don't think it's a should they or should they not is if they want to. For me, I want to do it just for that time with you, because usually when you're exercising, you're in another room exercising, I'm in another room doing whatever I'm doing right, and so I think it would be a lot better if we get to do it together yeah, it is fun.
Speaker 2:It can be fun absolutely doing it together. I tried your little workout plan and I was like this ain't for me yeah, yeah, absolutely I don't know.
Speaker 1:Maybe, maybe something is good. God want us to do it, so we'll keep doing it. I mean, I don't know. You hear all this thunder. It's raining today. It's interesting. We was talking about working out together. You hear the thunder Boom. I guess it was God. Like I want y'all to do it, like, do more of that OK, cool, ok.
Speaker 2:So number four was we are how do we create a fun bucket list for 2025? Yes, because I think everything else is so serious when you're talking to couples about eating right, exercise and budgeting and your resolution, so everything is so serious. But what? What are you going to do as a couple for 2025 or the upcoming year to have fun?
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think couples definitely to plan fun. We don't plan fun enough. A lot of couples plan like a family vacation, one vacation out the year. But you really need more than that. With the economy being the way it is, life is tough for a lot of people right now. You know, we just don't call it what it is. It's crazy. We just came out of an election year, there's different turmoil going on around, even the new presidency and all of that and people need something to relax.
Speaker 1:You know I've often joked about I just want to go to Disney World, just take me somewhere magical just to relax, and, you know, get away from it all. But couples need that regularly. When you can't go someplace as expensive as a Disney World or a vacation to the Bahamas or whatever the case may be, you need something set aside. If it's a staycation, couples can set quarterly staycations. Stay in your city, get a hotel, relax and enjoy each other. Go sightseeing in your city where you know the cost is minimum, or whatever works for you a time out, date night, date time, whatever it is. Plan something fun regularly, not just oh, we're going to do this during our vacation time from our job. You need more than that.
Speaker 2:Couples really need to be intentional about playing date nights.
Speaker 2:And that's number one, I feel like for for 2025, when you're doing your calendars, you really need to kind of put that on your calendar. And vacations. I think something for us we've always planned like fun vacations because we have a child, but we never plan like a someone, we're just going to go relax, yeah. So every time we go somewhere, it's like you know we're going to universal or we're doing stuff for with this, with the, with with Trey. It's like you know we're going to Universal or we're doing stuff with Trey, and it's always where we're just going, going, going and it's not nothing where we can just kind of relax and just me and you.
Speaker 1:And.
Speaker 2:I think initially we talk about doing stuff as a family, but we'll do the family thing, but we won't do just the me and you thing, and so I feel like a lot of couples need to plan that. And then you got to figure out what are you, what does your spouse want to go, what do you? What do you want to go? What do you like? Cause a lot of people don't really.
Speaker 2:sometimes, I know you will say it's whatever you want to do but I really want to know, like where do you want to go? Is there somewhere on your list that this place is just like? I just really want to go there? Yeah, and you never say You're just like whatever y'all want to do, but I just want to know.
Speaker 1:Keep in mind, some people like myself can be a little boring and my fun is. I know I said it, but I'm saying my fun is based on your fun. So if you're having fun, I'm saying my fun is based on your fun. Oh, okay, so if you're having fun.
Speaker 2:I'm good Okay.
Speaker 1:If you're good, that's what does it for me Okay, but if you're not good, I don't care where we at, I'm not going to be good.
Speaker 2:So basically, you want to go somewhere where I'm not going to be complaining and saying I don't like it.
Speaker 1:I want to go somewhere where you're going to pop up in the morning like what we doing today. Let's go and lay down and I'm like, I'm exhausted, but I had a great time. I don't want to go somewhere where you wake up like got me in this place, I don't even know what we doing. I want you to act like we in Chili's Island.
Speaker 2:Hey, we've been there before.
Speaker 1:No, I want you to wake up like this is great.
Speaker 2:You know, if you wake up saying it's great, I'm good I will be good Anywhere we go, as long as it's not cold as long as it's not cold.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know you hate the cold.
Speaker 2:But couples need to do that. They need to plan family time If you have kids. If you don't have kids, you just need to plan, like just times where you and your spouse can get away, yeah, and I think that'll be really good. And then regular date nights. Couples do not date enough, they get caught up in the routine of life and you just don't spend that intimate time to just get to know one another.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it's like what you did when you were dating before you got married. I don't know what it is. People flip this switch when they get married. It's like, yeah, you stop macking, you stop having fun, you just go to work, go home.
Speaker 2:You know, it may be because we together, all the time we live together, I see you all the time. It's just like it just kind of goes, gets this mundane normal thing like we're just doing life together.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:But it's just boring boring become boring.
Speaker 1:But seeing it was crazy. You notice how the devil's all in it, because then somebody else give you a little attention outside of your spouse and you be like, oh, that felt nice they like talking to me. Well, your spouse likes talking to you. Y'all just forgot to communicate right exactly you know you used to enjoy when your spouse would do things.
Speaker 2:Now it's just like you take them for granted, you get comfortable with them.
Speaker 1:Or you think, well, that's not necessary. No, it's necessary. We'll celebrate 20 years of marriage this year and it's still necessary for us to do things with each other, to have fun, to laugh. I think that's the best time, because life for us is so serious around children, responsibilities, ministry. We need time where we can just go sit down and talk, where we can go sit down and chill with one another and relax with one another.
Speaker 2:It's a necessity. I think that's really good, that you can just be yourself around your spouse and you don't have to be so serious. You can relax and just laugh and just enjoy each other and I think that's the biggest thing is just you being you with your spouse and there's them seeing. You know the side of you that others don't see and you have that intimate time together.
Speaker 1:Right, I love it. Well, I'm excited about it. Listen, if you enjoy this podcast, hopefully it helps you reset your year. Think about some things that maybe you didn't think about yet. Get with your spouse, get with your partner. You guys come up with those things that you want to accomplish this year. We would love for you to comment in the comment section. Tell us what your resolutions are. Tell us what your couple's goals are, even if you haven't talked to your spouse about it. What are you thinking about talking to them about? And if you say something interesting, we may talk about it on our next podcast. We'll reply to you and, uh, give you some ideas, some suggestions, some advice on how to go about it. But we want to see you win this year. We want to see you guys accomplish great things and we want to see you do it together. All right. So listen, we love you. We appreciate y'all joining us today all right, see you next time see you next time.
Speaker 1:Take care, hey. Thank you for joining us, for Doing it With the Daniels. If you want to keep up with everything going on on our channel don't forget to Like, comment, subscribe and share this podcast. Absolutely. We'll see you next time.