Doing It With The Daniels Podcast
Welcome to ‘Doing It With The Daniels’! This is where we show couples how to GET-IT-ON in life, marriage, AND ministry! 🚀
Doing It With The Daniels Podcast
Don't Ignore The Red Flags
Charles and Tesa Daniels share essential wisdom for singles on identifying and responding to relationship red flags that could signal future problems in marriage.
• Red flags are warning signs that demand attention and consideration before making a lifelong commitment
• Unaddressed anger and control issues often worsen after marriage, creating unhealthy power dynamics
• Disrespect and dismissiveness indicate fundamental problems that rarely improve without intervention
• Spiritual mismatches present significant challenges for believers seeking Christ-centered relationships
• Dishonesty and inconsistency during dating predict similar behavior patterns in marriage
• God will reveal both positive and negative aspects of relationships if we're willing to pay attention
• Taking time to evaluate red flags can prevent rushing into a relationship that isn't God's best
Marriage can make life "heaven on earth or hell on earth," so carefully consider who you're committing to for a lifetime.
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but I don't want people to be so focused on working through yeah that you don't realize when some things is not for you to fight. Welcome to doing it with the day is the podcast where we navigate life, marriage and ministry.
Speaker 2:I'm charles and I'm tisa. Join us as we share insights, wisdom and practical advice to strengthen your marriage, empower your life and enrich your ministry.
Speaker 1:Let's dive in together and discover the joys of doing it with the Daniels. Welcome to doing it with the Daniels, where we help couples get it on in life, marriage and ministry. Thank you for joining us again for another episode of our podcast. What's babe, what's up, ready to get? Cranky, I'm ready today excellent, well, well, I think we have something good today to talk to, uh, a specific group about who we dealing with today.
Speaker 2:We're gonna deal with the singles today singles today.
Speaker 1:You know we have singles that watch our podcast and sometimes, if we see them or they send us a notification, they'll say hey, we know y'all talk about marriage, but we love to hear something that would help us Exactly. Isn't it crazy how single people come on a podcast for married people talking about you got something for us. But I think some of the things they want to learn about marriage because they want to prepare for marriage and so they listen to these things, which I think is good, but also in preparing for marriage is not just about once you're married. It's about also what you need to do prior to getting married, and so I think it would be good for us to share some wisdom, some strategies, some tools and tips to help singles who are walking that journey and, as you know, when I talk about singles, I mean the unmarried. So whether you're dating, engaged, you are still single. Yeah, so I think we can.
Speaker 2:We can help them yeah, we're gonna help them today. So we're gonna talk about today is don't ignore the red flags. I think I hear that a lot people talking about red flags and stuff like that. So red flags, so what are red flags? I think I hear that a lot people talking about red flags and stuff like that so red flags.
Speaker 1:So what are red?
Speaker 2:flags. Red flags are warning signs.
Speaker 1:I mean when you hear red flags.
Speaker 2:I mean warning stop, wait a minute, pay attention.
Speaker 1:Yes, yes, you need to pay attention to what's going on yeah and you need to reevaluate um what your next move is going to be or how you're going to move forward in this relationship.
Speaker 1:When you see these red flags do I think all red flags are indication that you need to run no however, I do think all red flags demand your attention Right, and your consideration, and maybe even an adjustment in how you move forward. Now there are some red flags that you do need to run, like you see certain things you need to get away from that person immediately, immediately and realize this is not going to work. But some, some red flags flags I believe, can be worked through. But I don't want people to be so focused on working through, yeah, that you don't realize when some things is not for you to fight and work through some things, you would do better to save yourself the headache. Uh, now, if god put you with that person, you know that's God's will, then you trust him to help you. That it because it's God's will doesn't mean it's going to be easier no, we learned that right yeah doesn't mean it's gonna be easier to deal with.
Speaker 1:It just means he will help you if you trust him.
Speaker 2:But you still have to go through what you're going to go through yeah, I think the misconception that you know, I think we both hear when people, when they get married, is because they feel like it's God's will, then everything's supposed to be sunshine, rainbows and roses and perfect, and that's not true.
Speaker 2:You know, just because it is God's will does not mean you're not going to go through some things. It doesn't mean that you're not going to have difficult times. So it can be God's will, but you still are two broken people or two individuals coming together as one yeah, absolutely so and then sometimes the red flags.
Speaker 1:It just flips out of what you're saying is a sign to you that this might not be God's will right and you're trying to force something to work that God is saying no, this is not this is not it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's not the one I, that's not the one I have for you, and you got to be okay with that and accept that. Hey, that may not be the one, and I'm seeing all these red flags because God is trying to get my attention and get me to open my eyes and pull away some. But something like I said before, some people are so big on. I'm going to stick with this and we're going to work through it. But if you're going to abandon the process, the perfect time to do it is before you get married.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like that's the time Like I wouldn't, I wouldn't go into a marriage. This is just me. Personally, I would not go into a marriage with the mindset of, okay, we got all these issues, all these red flags, but we're going to work through it. If I felt like that when it came time for us to get married, I wouldn't have married you, I would not have. I would have said no, this is probably not going to be the best situation for either one of us, because if I may not have the patience to work through all this with you, um, and then I'm, I don't, may not even want that. Now, if we're married and things arise, hey, we in it, we gotta, we gotta navigate through it. But if I can see it on the front end before we get married, I'm gonna really consider this decision. Um, with some intention, intentionality, I'm really gonna take time to decide. Is this what I really need to do before I jump in, because these red flags may be a sign that, hey, this ain't for you so did you see any red flags?
Speaker 1:um, it's been a long time ago that the butterflies covered them up you can. Because you can, you can see what you want to see yeah um, be honest with you, I don't remember seeing red flags in our, in our relationship. I don't remember feeling like there were red flags around us, right, um, you know. So, yeah, I'm trying to think back. Was there anything that really gave me pause before we got married? And I can't, I can't think what about you, tyler? No, no.
Speaker 2:I love.
Speaker 1:Tyler we was, that was my guy, I think me and Tyler was got close before you and I really got close.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, I don't know. I don't recall having any red flags.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah yeah, I don't, I don't. I don't remember red flags for us. Yeah, um, I think we had things that bothered us, little hat, little behaviors, but it wasn't a red flag, it was just.
Speaker 1:That's just the way you are, it's the way I am, uh, and it became annoying, you know at times, yeah, but it wasn't like magnified yeah, it wasn't like this is a make or break deal or this is, this is a bad trait, that that could signify that you are a bad person? Yeah, it wasn't anything like that. But some couples do get into a relationship and there are some red flags and they really need to pay attention to these traits, these habits, these behaviors, modes of thinking, ways of dealing with life and different circumstances. That makes me think about kind of what we tell couples sometimes before you get married. Have you seen that person angry?
Speaker 1:oh yeah have you seen them frustrated? Have you seen how they handle pressure, like don't marry them until you see them in certain situations, because you need to know how they respond to that stuff?
Speaker 1:that's good they may, their representative may be sweet and nice and kind and charming and respectful when everything is good, but when things go crazy, who are they? Because that's when you're gonna see the real them. Exactly right. You don't see the real, the real side of a person until, hey, things aren't working in their favor. Then you see what's really in them. And so, yeah, yeah, I tell couples all the time look, you seen her mad, you seen you seen her frustrated? Yeah, then hold off on that, on that engagement, hold off. Just wait until you see one of those moments, see how they respond, and then you can decide do you want to deal with that? Because you might be sweet and all when things are good, but when something goes well, your attitude may be terrible.
Speaker 2:I need to know that. Yeah, I know a lot of people that you know. Like you said, you meet their representative. So, people can be a certain kind of way for a while because, they want to impress you. They want you to see them in their best self, their best light. You to see them in their best self, their best light. And then it's like once somebody told me once they got married. It's like man, it's like they flip into a wholly another person. Oh yeah, and it was like.
Speaker 1:I got you. Now I don't have to, I don't have to stay this person, that that you like. I can show you the real me.
Speaker 2:That's dangerous. That is very dangerous that we do that. I need to, I need to you the real me. That's dangerous. That is very dangerous that we do that.
Speaker 1:I need to see the real you before we get married. I need to know how you're going to handle some things before we say I do so I know if I want to live with that for the rest of my life, because truly we should take the approach in marriage of I'm in this. One man, one woman, one lifetime, lifetime. That's how it goes so the first topic is unaddressed anger and control issues yeah, that's one of the red flags, so I think we'll call these usually call them topics yeah we'll call them red flags this time, and this is not an exhaustive list yeah, this is just some points.
Speaker 2:Yeah, there's just a couple.
Speaker 1:Yeah, there's a few things we point out. Um, yeah, uncontrolled anger say say it again what unaddressed unaddressed anger, yeah, yeah and control issues, and control issues.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's, that's kind of like two in one yeah unaddressed anger me is when you find a person who they don't handle their anger well, like they blow up. And when they blow up they can become reckless with their words. Yeah, they can say things that maybe they don't mean, but they do mean it. You know, I don't believe in that. I didn't mean that. I maybe your intent wasn't that, but if you said, it's something in you felt that yeah that's just what I believe.
Speaker 1:I believe what the bible says out the abundance of the heart. The mouth speaks, and sometimes you got to get angry. Anger, I. I'd like to relate that to being akin to alcohol it gives you courage to say what you would not say in your soulful, more docile moments. Right, and so, yeah, you need to get angry. So I can see how you talk. When you get angry, do you become reckless? When you get angry, when you're frustrated, when you catch attitude, do you shoot off and then we'll come back later. Well, I'm sorry, I didn't mean it, but every time you get angry, you go there. No, no, no, that's who you are. That's a problem, right? That's a red flag, because you're going to become verbally abusive in this relationship if you don't get a grips on that. Am I saying run? No, I'm not saying run, I'm saying pay attention, yeah right and decide if you want to live with that.
Speaker 1:Can they change absolutely? But what if they don't?
Speaker 2:yeah, that's the thing. What if they don't? And I think a lot of people go into marriage hoping that they will change eventually. Or they're thinking like you, they can change them or they can make them happy yeah, and that's not the case.
Speaker 1:I'm gonna make you happy and you're just gonna deal with all your anger you're just gonna create a monster wrong wrong. You're gonna become a little do boy. You're gonna become somebody's slave and you're going to start living your life around pleasing them to appease their wrath and you're going to lose yourself in that relationship exactly because everything is going to be about them and making them happy and you're going to be miserable. Yep, so and the?
Speaker 2:other one is control issues.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:So usually people with control issues, they have a trauma in their life or an insecurity. Yeah, it's something that's happened in the past that they haven't got over. And so they filter everything through that issue.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And so they become controlling. They try to tell you what you can and what you cannot do, who you can talk to, and all of that when you can and can't go. Yes, who?
Speaker 1:you can talk to, and all of that where you can and can't go.
Speaker 2:Yes, when you can like you've grown I'm not, you're not my parent yeah, and even in a relationship you gotta, you know y'all not married so let's not, let's not what you know, the old saints or the old people, you say play house right let's not play house and let's not act like we're married. We're two, we're still single. So you know, and people when they're dating, it's like they want to act like they're married. Right, and that person is telling you what you can't do and you're and you're like doing this stuff and.
Speaker 2:I'm just like, yeah, that ain't, that's not cool.
Speaker 1:Well, we're not married. This is what women definitely am. For me, we're not married. You have no authority over my life whatsoever exactly you have no right to tell me who I can and cannot talk to, where I can and cannot go. You know it. Hey, you, you don't, can't tell what I can and can't do now because we're in a relationship. I need to govern myself and and conduct myself in a way that leads and builds a healthy relationship, but you can't run my life right you know, even when you get married, you shouldn't be trying to run my life, you know.
Speaker 1:So that's that could be a red flag, because when you deal with anger and control what it leads to kind of what we mentioned earlier whoever is subject subjecting themselves to that, they'll begin to walk on eggshells. Yeah, and if you have to walk on eggshells around the, if you have to walk on eggshells around the person you're in a relationship with, that's not a healthy relationship, it's unhealthy. And at that point I would suggest remember we're talking to singles, ain't talking about married people. Y'all married people need counseling and y'all need to learn to work through this stuff. You single people, you might need to run at that point. If you're having to walk around eggshells and you're having to acquiesce to that person and you can't say certain things, do certain things, or or you, you, you become fearful of their response. If you do something they don't like, yeah, that's an unhealthy relationship. It it can be described as an abusive relationship and it's a serious red flag it is serious red flag come on, look, we, we, we can stay on that all day long.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's, that's really good yeah, um.
Speaker 2:So the next red flag is disrespect and dismissiveness. Jesus, love that one disrespect.
Speaker 1:There is no relationship where disrespect exists. Disrespect is a serious red flag and and if you're being disrespected, um, yeah, you, you might want to run. If this person does not respect you and respect boundaries, or even respect your family, yeah, you know, that's all.
Speaker 2:Of that can become a huge issue yeah um in, in, in the relationship yeah, because I feel like respect is not something that you have to fight for. You shouldn't have to fight for respect, and if they're not respecting you now, they're not going to respect you later yeah, yeah, I would say this is, this is a big one, I mean I can't.
Speaker 1:I can't act like it's not, because even the bible talks about wives respect your husbands and where it tells husbands to love their wives. There's an element of respect there that goes in the way husbands love their wives yeah so. So, if you don't respect me before, we get married.
Speaker 2:You're not going to expect me when we get married, you're probably going to become more disrespectful.
Speaker 1:We were respectful to one another yeah but in the course of marriage, you you tend to experience this aspect of uh, I want I don't want to say devaluing of your partner. It's not really devaluing, it's where you become comfortable and common yeah, you become comfortable with them and you become complacent in some things and it can become disrespectful and you got to snap back from that and remember that.
Speaker 1:No, we're married and I need to give you the same respect that you appreciated before. Yeah, we were in this covenant relationship, so, so respect is a big deal. So if there's no respect before we get married, there's not going to be respect afterwards. And this is not going to be a healthy relationship.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly yeah.
Speaker 1:So disrespect, dismissiveness dismissiveness is a serious issue too because, dismissiveness says what you feel, and what you think does not matter.
Speaker 2:Right, these are all about me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, these are both two and ones.
Speaker 1:yeah yeah uh, yeah, it's all about me. So what, what's going on with you is not important. You know, you're always minimizing the personal. You're always being minimized by the other person. How you feel, how you think, is always no big deal. There's no change, no adjustment. Yeah, to come to a place of understanding and reasoning with you. That's a serious red flag. That's a serious red flag. And um, yeah, I'm not saying with that one, I'm not saying run. Sometimes people have to learn how to be attentive to their partner.
Speaker 1:But if, over the course of time, you're always dismissive and blowing things off as if it's not important, you might want to just pay attention, yeah we might need to figure out if this is going to work, because I didn't marry you for you not to consider how I feel exactly and and use empathy and walk with me through certain things or feel like because it's not your issue, because everything about me should be your issue right if we're in this relationship together you should at least be concerned yeah, yeah, so I would, I would. That's definitely a big deal and, like I said, if they're that way before you get married, they.
Speaker 2:They're going to be that way in the marriage and probably worse, and that's that's.
Speaker 1:that's real talk. Yeah probably worse after you get married. Yeah, yeah, pay attention, that was dangerous.
Speaker 2:So the next one and I think it's a huge one, it should have been, and I guess they're not in any order order, but I will put this one at the top of the list is a spiritual mismatch. So that is what we call unequally yoked yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:What do you think about that? I?
Speaker 2:think that is huge, because I think a lot of people come into, especially believers. They come into a relationship and they feel like if I love God and they say they love God and they go to church or they read their Bible, then they can um, they can pull that person in. And I always tell like I talked to my son all the time if they don't have already a desire for God, a desire for his word, a desire to please him and be obedient to the word of God, they don't have that conviction already, then you might need to run or go the other way, because there's you're not going to be able to pull that person in. They got to already have that from the beginning.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And so and I feel like sometimes a lot of singles will accept certain things, certain behaviors, just because, oh well, they go to church or they read their bible, and sometimes, you know, they even go as far as they'll read a scripture together or they'll do a little devotional together. But their heart is not really for God and you have to be able to see that first, before you go all in with people yeah, I think that's true.
Speaker 1:And the other aspect of it they're doing it for you yeah, like you said it's not in them, but they'll do it for you long enough and to convince you that, oh yeah, they all love god like you love god, but if it's, if it's, if they just started with you, it might not be there like they want you to believe.
Speaker 2:It is um, and it can be and it's okay if they just met, you know, god and had an encounter with church and god and all this stuff.
Speaker 1:Let them go and get that experience and get all of god before you try to, you know, have a relationship with them, yeah, and we're not saying break up or anything like that but maybe take your time as they're growing with God and make sure that their growth in God isn't about you getting you, you know, because if it's about getting you, once they get you, they're gonna drop God, and that's or they never had them in the beginning, right and so and so that's a huge and then, when you get, if you decide to move forward and marry this person, you're going to find that maybe you want God.
Speaker 2:But they really don't.
Speaker 1:Or you're going to find out that there and I hate to use this word on the podcast, but you may find out they're just religious. Religious means they're just going through the motion of what looks like God, like God, sounds like God, but in their heart, yeah, they don't really love that.
Speaker 1:They're really not in love with him and really want him yeah, they just want to do enough so that when you look at them, it looks like oh they're doing the God stuff yeah, exactly but but yeah, that that spiritual mismatch can be huge for a lot of couples, yeah, uh, in their relationship and and I'll be honest with you, that's one of the main areas when, when couples come to us and they're like, oh, I met this person, I want to get married, or we want to talk about getting married that's the first thing we talk about do they love Jesus? Not do they go to church. Do they love Jesus, and when? Yeah, they love Jesus. How do you know? Oh, they love Jesus. How do you know?
Speaker 1:Oh, because we pray together so.
Speaker 2:I love when they come to church because you can see, oh, I can see when they when, how they worship when you know how they look if they just sit in there, if they stand in there, they're not opening their mouth. They're not you know what of what they say oh yeah, there's other things that you need to be paying attention to, yeah.
Speaker 1:I love when single women bring guys to church that they're dating and you know, sometimes they don't realize. They bring them because they're like.
Speaker 1:I want you to just see them and look at them and they see what you know, what do you think? And that's just people who respect their pastors. Yeah, will do that. And guys come in and, man, some of them just sit there and just look and they don't. They don't pray, they don't lift their hands, they have no response for god and it's like you want to be with this guy, this guy, this guy right here. All right, well, that's gone. It's going to be a road to walk If you want to. Does he, does he know Jesus? Right? Yeah, he said he got saved at the age of seven and was baptized at eight. And okay, but does, and okay, but does he live for god? Now, when he say he pray, what's the fruit of his life? How often does he pray? Do you know he has a prayer life? Does he read his bible? Does he attend worship somewhere regularly? Yeah, and even with that, where does he attend? Is it a church that teaches and preaches truth, exactly from the word of god?
Speaker 2:and I get this like sometimes when they meet people I'll be like, oh, what kind of what? What church do they go to?
Speaker 1:I don't know, I'm like, but that's important because you gotta know, you want to be with them.
Speaker 2:You don't know where they go to church, what kind of word they're hearing yeah, because you gotta know, because every denomination teaches different things, and so, or you, got places look like a church but it's a cult and they hey, they teaching all kind of crazy stuff, yeah, and I mean it's a lot it's a lot.
Speaker 1:We could talk about that all day, but I want to say this.
Speaker 2:That takes me back to when you and I first met, or what I prayed. I just asked God, I wanted somebody who would at least go to church, because the person I was talking to, they wouldn't go. They wouldn't even go to church. So I was like go lord, I just send me somebody who would at least go to church and that loves you so you was praying about leaving the person you was with before you left them no, no, no that would have sounded like no, you said I was praying God, send me somebody to go to church, because the person I was with yeah, before
Speaker 2:no because we was broken up, but I'm just saying the last person, they wouldn't go to church and I was like, okay, you sure remember a lot about your ex. We talking to the singles but I just that just kind of brought that up, I just brought that back to my remembrance. So what I'm saying is that was my prayer. You know, what I'm saying that's all I asked for is somebody to go to church, but the other part was that loved you. And so that's, I wanted somebody that loved God.
Speaker 1:And you got a preacher.
Speaker 2:And again, I ain't asked for that. Like God you gave me a little too much Like thank you Jesus, but okay. But, yeah, so that's that's that's what I wanted. You know what I'm saying I wanted somebody that loved him, that I wouldn't have to convince to come on this journey with me yeah, and I think that's key right there.
Speaker 1:If you have to convince them to come on the journey, not of a relationship, but a journey with christ, that's a red flag. Yeah, for a believer now, both of y'all unbelievers and y'all both living in the world, living in sin hey, everything goes. But if you're a believer and we like to focus on kingdom couples, christ-centered marriages and relationships if that's the case, you got to really take that into account. That's a serious issue.
Speaker 1:You're gonna spend the rest of your life with somebody that does not love god like you love him yeah that's gonna be a problem I ain't saying they got to do all of what you do, but do they love him? And have a conviction for him and are willing to build a life around him.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's what you got to consider so the next red flag is dishonesty and inconsistency.
Speaker 1:Yes, lord, dishonesty yeah, that's a liar.
Speaker 2:If they lie now they're gonna lie later when you get married.
Speaker 1:Yeah so don't be just yeah, it's just a little lie, little white lie, baby little white lies, big black lies, whatever. Whatever you want to be, a lie is a lie, and if that person's a liar, you setting yourself up for danger. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If they lie to you while they single single, they're gonna lie to you when you get married. That's a red flag.
Speaker 2:I would not, absolutely would not, under no circumstance recommend anyone stick in a relationship with a liar yeah, yeah, because even if they're gonna lie about some of the small things, then you need to pay attention yep, yep, because if they lie about that, those lies will grow and become bigger.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, that's, that's a huge red red flag. And then you said inconsistencies. If they're inconsistent the patterns of their life, the way they move, the way they do things, if that's not sitting right, yeah, you need to pay attention to that. That's a red flag because if if you're not consistent, I can't build a basis for security in the relationship, exactly Because I don't know what you're doing. I never know what I'm going to get from you. If your personality is inconsistent, if you up one day, down another, you know you shooting off, going crazy one day and the next day you're calm. Yeah, you might have some other psychological, emotional things going on that I need to pay attention to. Yeah, no, it's a lot of people out here they got have undiagnosed mental medical conditions and you need to be aware of that exactly before you engage in a relationship with them. You know some people have learned to cope, yeah, with their condition and hide it yeah, you gotta look close now you see what's going on yeah, so pay attention
Speaker 2:to all the the red flags pay attention to, and sometimes it's not even that god show. God will show you, especially if you're a believer, you walk with god, you have the holy spirit. He will show you things.
Speaker 1:He will show you things.
Speaker 2:He will tell you things and I think sometimes we kind of ignore, you know, Holy Spirit at times.
Speaker 1:We ignore when we want what we want.
Speaker 2:Exactly.
Speaker 1:We want it so bad. Some people want to be married or in a relationship so bad that they will ignore the red flags Until it's too late. Yeah, don't deceive yourself.
Speaker 2:That's good.
Speaker 1:Don't deceive yourself. Trying to get what you want exactly, it's not going to work out. Good, be sober, be vigilant. Come on this bible right here. That's what you have us here. The devil goes about as a roaring lion seeking whom he may devour, and sometimes he's coming through the person you think you in love with in order to bring destruction and chaos in your life.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so pay attention to the red flags. Yeah, ask god to show you. I think one of the prayers we often pray with couples as we get ready to wrap up, and we encourage you all to pray this in your relationship. We pray before we meet.
Speaker 1:God, show us everything we need to know good and bad, yeah help us to see it clearly and give attention to it, to help this couple make the proper decision in their journey. That's right. If it's bad, show us now so they can run, call it all off, be done with it. And I mean that from the bottom of my heart. Tell them, no, I ain't gonna be with you, I'm not marrying you, you're not the one you know, or? If god, if you're in it and you want you approve this, give them all the signs they need to let them know, to have assurance that, yes, god is with us. Yeah, let's go forward. Yeah, because if you don't have that, that's a problem. So God will show you when he's for you, and I believe God will show you when he's like, yeah, this ain't it don't do this, you know, or if you do it anyway, God will still bless you.
Speaker 2:God will still honor your marriage.
Speaker 1:He does but you're gonna go through more than you might have.
Speaker 2:Yeah, if you would have done it his way yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:So pay attention to the red flag. They're there to help you yes they are all right, you got anything else. That's it. Look, I think that's good. That's gonna help some couples that's been looking past stuff just to make it work yeah, just pay, attention, slow down pay attention, slow down and pay attention. My goodness, don't be in a rush. Don't be in a rush to get married.
Speaker 1:You know, we made the decision that we would end our relationship yeah if some things didn't go, if God didn't show us he was with us, we was gonna call it quick.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it would have broke my heart, but I was like God, I know, I know you can heal my heart.
Speaker 1:Heart would have been broken right here Like, hey, this ain't God. But I told God.
Speaker 2:I said if he's not the one, I will be sad and I know my heart will be broken, but I know that you will heal me and I'll be okay eventually.
Speaker 1:I'd rather have a broken heart for a little span of time than to have a broken life For a lifetime. Jesus, Look, we'll end with this Marriage. Who?
Speaker 2:you marry?
Speaker 1:can make your life heaven on earth, or they can make it hell on earth, and so you better be careful and really pay attention to the one you jump in with yes all right, listen.
Speaker 1:I hope this has helped you guys pay attention to those red flags. If this, this podcast, this episode has been beneficial to you or somebody you know, share with them. I feel like some of y'all need to share this one with some people, share it on social media. Let them know. You need to listen to this because I see the red flags and you don't. But you can watch this podcast, tell them I love you, but it's going to help you. So make sure you like and subscribe so you don't miss another episode, and we can't wait to see you again. On Doing it With the Daniels. All right, take care, hey, thank you for joining us for Doing it With the Daniels, if you want to keep up with everything going on on our channel don't forget to like, comment, subscribe and share this podcast.
Speaker 1:Absolutely. We'll see you next time.