Empowering Women Project
This podcast is for the women who know deep in their soul they are here for more. They are done with bs stories and limiting beliefs that are holding them back from their dreams becoming a reality. This is for the women who are ready to jump in the driver’s seat and start to pave the way back home, to her.
Empowering Women Project
Self-Love: The Foundation of Your Power
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We explore the transformative power of self-love and how implementing small, consistent acts of self-care builds trust in ourselves and creates a foundation for deeper relationships with others.
• Self-love is a journey with natural ebbs and flows that requires grace and forgiveness
• Building trust with yourself through keeping small promises creates deeper self-worth
• Understanding your values and boundaries helps distinguish between trauma responses and intuition
• Implementing "She Shifts" - small, meaningful actions that can shift your relationship with yourself
• Self-forgiveness is crucial for moving forward and breaking guilt/shame spirals
• The importance of knowing both what you want AND what you won't tolerate in relationships
• Physical practices like breathwork, stretching, and movement can release stored emotions
• Even during busy periods, everyone can find five minutes for intentional self-care
Make one small promise to yourself today and keep it, no matter what. When you start building trust with yourself, everything shifts - your confidence grows and your self-love deepens.
Thank you. Stories and limiting beliefs that are holding you back from your dreams becoming a reality.
Speaker 1:Come, jump in the driver's seat and pave the way back home to her. This is a space for you to feel seen, heard, supported and accepted for who you are, who you were and who you're becoming.
Speaker 2:Celebrating you wherever you are in your journey. Sit back, grab a tea or a wine and come empower yourself with us. Jewels and day, let's grow.
Speaker 1:Hello beautiful humans, Welcome back to the EWP.
Speaker 2:Hello, hello, happy Monday.
Speaker 1:Happy Monday or whatever day you're listening to this on Could be a Tuesday, wednesday, thursday, friday. It's so weird actually doing the intro like it just feels so funny we've switched it up this year.
Speaker 2:So, as you probably know, if you're a listener, last year I was always introing us and this year, um, we've switched it up, so Daylene has that role of introing us now. You're doing great, honey, you're doing amazing.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, today I think we really want to touch on self love again and I know we've done a previous episode on this. However, that was really at the beginning of when we started the podcast episode on this. However, that was really at the beginning of when we started the podcast and I just think, like self-love is so important and so pivotal, and especially this year, I just feel like it's the year for a lot of people to just go inwards and, you know, really get that validation from yourself and pour into your cup and fill your soul. Um. So yeah, I think this episode is going to be all about like a self-love glow up, and if you haven't started, then now here's your sign, here's your chance to begin empowering yourself with self-love yes, and I'm pretty sure it's like Venus retrograde at the moment as well, isn't it Started yesterday?
Speaker 1:I'm fairly sure that's the perfect amount. Yeah, you've been watching that. Yeah, you've been watching that a little bit.
Speaker 2:Tell me about that, because I haven't read too much into it. So what is that about?
Speaker 1:What I got from it. I was just listening to a podcast about it, so it's pretty much like endings are happening, like towards the end of like this month. I'm not an astrologist, so this is just what I learned on the podcast and I haven't fully listened to the rest of the podcast yet. But yeah, it's about like endings and just yeah, it's like self-love and letting go of things and it's just kind of all of the things I feel like we went through. I'm pretty sure there was like a Mars. Was it Mars retrograde Again, I'm not an astrologist or anything like that, but that was like chaotic. That was insane. And with the Venus retrograde at the moment my son has actually told me as well all the planets are like lining up and it's quite rare. So it's such a powerful time to like manifest and all the rest of it.
Speaker 2:So yeah, oh cute, I love that.
Speaker 1:Yes, that's from Abby. She's been on here before a couple of times and she's also in self-love school that I'm doing at the moment as well and she's been putting all the stuff in there too. So, yeah, really cute, oh cute.
Speaker 2:Yes, you're back into that. You're back into the self-love school. How come you're doing it a second?
Speaker 1:time. Tell a second time. Tell us um, well, I just went through an era where I kind of just like self-sabotage myself completely and utterly um, and just, yeah, um, abandoned myself in a sense and, um, yeah, like all the things that light me up, I just wasn't doing um and, yeah, it was just kind of out of alignment. So I thought, yeah, what a great time to do it the second time. But it's so funny because the first time that I actually did it, um, I was already deep in therapy, I was alcohol free and all that stuff. So I already felt like I was pretty strong and solid.
Speaker 1:Um, but this time I went in like holy fuck, with so much resistance and I know so many people will resonate with this, like when they're stepping into the next version or they know there's shit to heal, they're like holy shit, like usually I'm excited for that stuff. This time I was like I don't even want to open up the workbook or like watch the modules, and the modules are the same as what they were last year, but I'm taking out different stuff to what I did last year. Um, and I don't, yeah, like it's just crazy. But the resistance was there and now I can fully understand people that like don't want to heal and stuff.
Speaker 1:Because when I started really healing and going into therapy I was actually really excited. Like I was like fuck yeah, like I knew there was shit to heal, but I was excited to heal it. And then this time I was like, ah no, I don't want to. Um, now I know that resistance that people feel, um, but yeah, it's been really good and I'm just I'm not like logically rushing it either, I'm actually like just slowly processing it. Last year I was like right, every Sunday I need to do this and like have to do this by Wednesday, and this time I'm kind of just sitting back and allowing when the things are meant to happen and kind of surrendering a little bit more.
Speaker 2:Compared to last year, I was like fully like masculining my way through healing, when this time I'm kind of a little bit more so yeah, I love that and it's okay for your like love for yourself to fluctuate and for you to deviate between eras and for you know we're not always going to be like. You know we're doing all of this all of the time like we're human beings and things happen.
Speaker 1:You know we step out of our power, but it sounds like it's time for you to step back into your power, and I'm 150,000% here for that same and it's so funny when you go through stuff, like the wisdom that you do like yeah, I did pretty much like self-abandon myself and stuff, but the wisdom that you get coming back out of it, like when you choose you fully again, is just insane. Like I'm like, oh, I would go go through that 10 times over again to gain the wisdom and the lessons that I did learn and the reflections of, like the self-abandoning and realizing. I did that in a lot of my relationships, um, and I've known that before. But like when you're fully aware of it, it's, it's just so different.
Speaker 2:So yeah, yeah, and it's like the epiphanies. We talk about the epiphanies all the time that we have and, you know, both of us are so open to like external love, for love from another, like from a man. Do you know what I mean? Like we're both, we want that, we are open to meeting our future hubby and I think that's beautiful for us both. But, yeah, so many lessons are learned along the way, whereas before, in relationships or when we were dating, it would just be very much like, oh, you know, focusing on this is what went wrong, this won't run wrong.
Speaker 2:But now I feel like it's a totally different perspective, it's kind of shifted and it's like, oh, what can I learn from this? What do I need to grow on? What was the lesson here? What is the universe trying to teach me? And so it's really honing in on those things. Which is powerful, like that is self-love in itself Just being able to have those epiphanies and learn and grow and then take them and apply them or heal those parts of us that we know might have come forward. You know, and I know, for both of us recently it was about, like, when we were dating, it was recently about, um, you know how we could not like have that self-abandonment, and how we could stay true to ourselves, but also how we could learn and grow from what we were both going through.
Speaker 1:Yeah, Because it's so easy. And it's so easy when you are in a situation to be like, okay, him, him, him, him, him or her if you're dating a woman, um, and blame everything on them. But then you're like hold on, like what was the part that I played in this? Where did I like self-abandon? I got full body goosebumps then, but like where, where did I self-abandon and where did I like pretty much fuck up really at the end of the day.
Speaker 1:But obviously the self-awareness comes into that as well, because being able to actually sit back and go, what is the part that I did play and how can I heal that? And where the where the hell is that coming from? And if you don't have tools, obviously get a therapist or which, yeah, we both have um. Or enroll yourself into a course like self-love school or future courses that we might create um. Or healing, like being in a healing circle with jewels, like things like that, and just being able to like, yeah, gain that self awareness and just reflect back on where could I do better next time? And I feel like there is different lessons for different people and different times in your life as well, but if you have the fundamental tools and that self-awareness, you'll be able to like see. See where not where you went wrong, but where the magic lies that you can heal.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly, and I think this is one of the huge things that I learned in my last sort of dating adventure that I had. There was the need to, yeah, just make sure your boundaries and your values are so strong, and you keep coming back to those. You keep coming back to those Like, yes, I was still open and, you know, I was willing to listen and hear and see where this person was coming from. However, I was like, well, no, like, these are my values, and I just kept coming back to that. This is my values, these are my boundaries, and when they were being crossed, I was like, you know, you know, yeah, we can only take so much, but I feel like that was something that I hadn't really focused a lot on in relationships or in the dating world.
Speaker 2:Um, like, I knew what my values and boundaries were, but I found I always seemed to have rose colored glasses on and I always seemed to, you know, deviate away from those. But I feel like with this most recent one, I was very aware of what was happening and still open at the same time, but then I got to a point where I was like, actually, no, like it's the same pattern that is replaying over and over. So, yeah, that self-awareness is absolutely key and those values and those like those boundaries just if you don't already have that map them out. And we were gonna do something new. We started this new thing where we say, um, I only thought of a word.
Speaker 1:Yeah, if you listen to the last episode, we were trying to think of a word for our little prompts along the way. Yeah, and then um julia tied it into chat tvt and got some ideas and we made up she shifts yeah.
Speaker 2:So with she shifts, we just figured that'll be like our little, not exercises, but kind of like things you can try, things that might work for you.
Speaker 2:We've always had them, but we've just never had like a name for them, and so we were like we should have a name for this. So the name will be she shifts, because when we're adding things to our toolkit we are going to shift naturally, like so, yeah, we're going to start we'll say say things like this is a she shift moment. So, yes, this is one of those moments that I want to bring forward and with this she shift, if you haven't already mapped out the foundations of who you are as a woman, for example, values, your boundaries, you know those types of things and what you actually want in another person, and you know how you love yourself, so it's kind of like a road map, I suppose, to yourself, which then to being with another person. And I feel like we so often go into other relationships or friendships or things like that, just like aimlessly, and you know we need to be going in prepared because you know ultimately we want that to last and if we have those foundations right, then it's going to be, I think pivotal.
Speaker 1:We'll stay tuned, we'll let you know well, I got goosebumps like consistently right now, uh also another thing I wanted to add into that is also knowing what you don't want, because we've all had relationships where there's been repeating patterns or habits that someone not someone else has had, but things that don't feel right in our bodies. Um, and understanding what you will not, will not tolerate, is another thing, especially like poor communication and you know, especially like to say they're going out or whatever, like things like that. Like communication and stuff like that. Um, yeah, especially poor communication. Um, but yeah, understanding the things that, like reflecting on old relationships, what didn't make you feel good at the time. Knowing that too. Knowing what doesn't feel good feel good at the time, knowing that too. Knowing what doesn't feel good in your body, what you will not tolerate from here on out.
Speaker 2:And one of the huge things, babe, that we were both kind of dealing with as well was like that, that way up between, is this like past trauma?
Speaker 2:like my past trauma coming forward or is this my intuition? And so I think when you're starting to date and you're starting to meet other people, other human beings that you want to progressively build a relationship with, we kind of all get these things. So it kind of spins off of what you said. If we have a list of like what we like in a person, the qualities that we're looking for, and then we have a list of our non-negotiables, like these, these are our boundaries, our non-negotiables Then it can make it very easy to like pull it out and go back and be like okay, you know, this was on my list. This continuously has happened. This has happened three times now. I've communicated it. It's not okay. And then it's happened again. So you know, I'm going to stay at that boundary again. So, yeah, it's happened again. So you know, I'm going to stay at that boundary again. So, yeah, just trust yourselves. Like so often we're like oh, second guessing, is this my you know trauma or is this my intuition? Ladies, it's your intuition?
Speaker 2:yes, generally 99% of the time, your intuition. Trust it, trust it, trust it, trust it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and you know when you start losing that spark within yourself, like, and you know that you start losing that spark within yourself, like, and you know that you're putting off like working out, you're putting off chasing your dreams. You. That's not fucking healthy and you can even do that in a somewhat healthy relationship, but you're just so used to putting people before yourself that you just lose sight of you, which is definitely like a you problem and you need to take responsibility of that. But yeah, you know, when you're losing your spark, like and you have no energy, and you're to take responsibility of that. But yeah, you know, when you're losing your spark, like and you have no energy and you're more sad and overthinking than you are anything else, um, yeah, you, just you know deep down you know, everyone in my relationships I've known literally almost from the start and I'm like, oh yeah, like I can change them, or blah, blah, blah, change the outcome and it it becomes worse and worse.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, and if you go through your single era like you know, you can be a strong, badass woman, like badass. You know where you've got your. This is this is how my day goes. I like to do this for my morning routine. I like to end my evening like this you know, keep those things, those are who you are, those things were important to you before you met somebody. Those things are feeling filling your cup, so continue filling your cup.
Speaker 2:So often, as Dailene was just saying, we will sort of abandon ourselves to you know, especially as empaths. Where we will make the man you know, or woman sorry, we keep saying man the other partner. Where we will make the man you know, or woman, sorry, we keep saying man, the other partner. We will make the partner, like, put them up on this pedestal and we're like, oh, you know, I've got to give them everything I have, but it's like, no, we need to always be us, be independent, have that about us, have our own dreams, our own goals, our own wants, desires, you know, and the other person needs to have that as well. You know they need to be doing those things as well. And then that's where you come together with a friendship and you know, build upon that and then you can build goals together.
Speaker 1:But always, we should always have our personal like goals, I think, anyways, yeah, because doing all these hand gestures yeah, I should really start recording videos if people could see our hand gestures. We're so passionate. But, um, yeah, like we have an identity outside of our relationship. Our relationship is only one part, and then if you have kids, that's another part. But the the you and we said this last week as well the you that is, um, I forgot what I was gonna say. Yeah, I can't remember now it's okay.
Speaker 2:It's basically about you not abandoning yourself, like you are important you're worthy.
Speaker 2:You're worthy of your own love you know your love comes first before anybody else's. Like and I think that's the whole message about self-love is like we need to love ourselves always, whether we're with someone, whether we're not, whether you know, we're going through a hard time even just making really small little commitments. Like little commitments, um, because you're worth it, you are worth it, we are all worth it. So it's every time we make a small commitment to ourself and we actually follow through with it, our worth goes through the roof, like we just feel more worthy. You know we stop searching for that external validation because we actually have it in us, like we've got it. You know everything we need is here, is inside our heart, is inside our body.
Speaker 1:The thought came back and it was choosing you. Like you are the person that you go to bed with. You are the person that you know has the hard times and the good times. People can leave. Your kids end up leaving the group. Like your partners leave. Like your partners can leave at any time, like your family, family. You know anything can happen every time, but choosing you over and over and over again and choosing you every single day is 100% like and, yeah, like you said, like building that foundation by trusting yourself again, because a lot of us actually don't feel safe in our bodies from a very young age because our bodies either weren't ours or they were controlled or you know all the other things. Um, yeah, like learning to feel safe in your own body again. And then, yeah, choosing you and that's how it all, that's all how it all works out. Hey, like just resetting your nervous system, like learning those tools and just coming back all the time exactly like those small commitments to yourself, like it can be so simple.
Speaker 2:It can be literally something like you know, every morning when I wake up I'm going to do a breath work. Or every morning when I wake up I'm going to do five affirmations in the mirror. Or, you know, I'm going to do a gratitude list at the end of each day. Like that's self-love, like there are so many beautiful ways that you can cultivate self-love. It's about what makes you feel full. So what makes me feel good wouldn't necessarily be the same as what makes Darlene feel good, you know, or the neighbour. It's what makes you feel good. So it's going to look different for everyone.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm going to list a couple of mine that make me feel good at the moment that I'm using and utilising. It's definitely walking every night. Walking at night freaks the hell out of Julia, but yeah, I love walking at night. I just feel like it's the most peaceful time of the day, it's not hot up here and it's just so soulful for me. And then also I've been incorporating breath work multiple times of the day and also, um, taking deep breaths before I eat food just to, like, signal the rest and digest, and that has been helping so much.
Speaker 1:Like I'm not eating as much and stuff like that, um, because like I can tend to go binge eat and just eat crazy amounts of food. Like I love food. Um, what else? I'm back doing my little hikes again as of yesterday, which light me up, like I just love being out in nature by myself, um, or listening to a podcast or something, but most of the time I pretty much have no music now and I just listen to nature and the snakes trying to get away from me, um, so, yeah, there are a few things that light me up and skincare at night time.
Speaker 2:So yeah, yeah, amazing, I'll list them of mine. Um, so for me, it's definitely like I am huge on skincare and I think I've been on the skincare band for a while now. Um, but I can live like I can look at myself without makeup, like I've been having a lot of no makeup days. You know which makeup I do because it feels good. I like to do my makeup Like I actually enjoy you know doing my makeup and contouring and you know all of the things, but I'm actually loving my no makeup days because I feel like my skin is glowing. So that is one huge thing in mine as well.
Speaker 2:Reading I am currently reading both a personal development book and a fiction book, and so you, you know, it's whatever I'm feeling like. So I'm not committed to one or the other, it's like, oh, I actually just feel like reading right now. So I've got two books on the go um, the physical, actual books, which is great. Journaling, um, as well, meditating, some somatics. I've been dancing and singing a lot, like a lot, um, so that's been really huge for me lately. And then, really getting back into, when I went to Canada, I kind of deviated away from my supplements, so I have found that those have been incredibly supportive for me. Um, and then Pilates and yoga. I've been honing in on a lot. So, yeah, yeah, it's, it's the things that make you feel good, good, yeah, make you feel fulfilled, and they can be anything.
Speaker 1:Yeah, definitely. That's. Another thing I wanted to add too is just deep stretching or just intuitive stretching. I've been doing that also every morning and every night. Um, and oh my god, you don't realize. Sometimes you can be like a little bit anxious or a little bit overwhelmed and as soon as you stretch things out just for a hot minute, like even if it's five minutes, you can literally change your state, like and I was very surprised because I'm always like you know, go hard, go home, but just having that intentional time with your body can definitely release some things. So, yeah, definitely.
Speaker 2:I've been doing that a lot with my jaw. So my jaw I just find, with the healing area that I'm in at the moment, that lots of my pain is in my jaw and my pelvis and my hips. But my jaw, like even right now, it is just like throbbing, throbbing so painful. So I've just been really intentional, intentional, intentional both I'm gonna brand that um, but I've been really massaging it and then my osteo actually taught me so I'll actually take my my index finger and put it inside my mouth and go along my TMJ and massage that from the inside of my mouth, obviously with clean hands, and then the thumb rests on the outside, so that you're massaging, kind of like in this motion, yeah, um, but yeah, just things like that. And most of the time when I do that exercise, I actually cry when I do it and that's telling me that my body's actually releasing trauma that's stored in that area and then it's ready to come out. So, yeah, just prepare, if you're going to do somatics, that they can bring tears. So just make sure that you're prepared for that and you feel safe in your body and just remind yourself as well that you are safe, amen, amen, and say, for example, you're sitting here listening to this and you're like, oh, I actually have spent the last month.
Speaker 2:Just go, go, go. What have I even done for myself? You know, give yourself grace, we all go through times where we deviate away from self and so, you know, here is your sort of she shift moment. Five minutes, five or 10 minutes. You know we all have that time. Put the phone away in the evening, you know, before you go to bed, or when you first wake up, or even on your lunch break at a red light. You know, do something for you. It can be so simple, you know it can. It can be life-changing-changing, but slowly.
Speaker 1:If you have gotten off the bandwagon, just start implementing really small, little baby things yeah, I no offense, I call bullshit on people that are like I got no time. I'm like everyone has five minutes. I'm like, even if you have toddies, even if you have babies, I'm so sorry. Like I've been a single mom for a long time and I can still find five minutes for myself. Um, like, and you just got to be conscious of where that five minutes is. It could be like when the kids are playing in the toy room or whatever, and be like okay, I can have a couple of deep breaths, like it doesn't take too much and you don't need to go spend lots of money to do self-love and self-care. Like it literally can be in the in the four walls of your home or just outside grabbing yourself. So yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2:So we encourage you to pick one small, little, tiny promise to yourself, starting now, starting today, starting after you finish listening to this episode, and do it, no matter what. Build that trust in yourself, keep that promise to yourself, because as you keep that promise, you build that trust which builds your self-efficacy, which builds your self-love, and it's just like those pivotal foundations that make us who we are.
Speaker 1:And when you start finding that that one thing is installed, then you can do another one, and then another one, and then eventually it will compound. And then you're like, oh my God, who am I?
Speaker 2:Exactly, exactly, yeah. And I think one of the things that when I think about self-love, I think about confidence as well, and I think about how I've gone through different eras of my life and I've really lacked confidence. But then I'll look back at things and I'll be like, wow, you know, you actually were X, y Z, you know this, this was fantastic about you. But then we're our own worst critics. So just yeah, try and flip those negative thoughts that we have about ourselves to positive, because one day we will look back at that era and be like, oh, you know, your eyes were really lit up or your skin was glowing or, you know, you looked stunning. So, yeah, just being kind to yourself, we deserve our own kindness, and when we're kind to ourselves, especially about our appearance, that builds upon our self-love as well, and it like confidence. We were not born with confidence. We build upon that. We build that ourselves.
Speaker 1:So and that's like it pretty much starts with the internal thoughts that you have as well, um, and yeah, that will shine through to the external, but everything is an inner job and, yeah, if we can start changing the way that we think about ourselves, speak to ourselves, um, yeah, your whole world shifts.
Speaker 1:And also another thing I want to touch on as well is forgiveness for yourself, yourself and not staying in like the guilt and shame spiral of just say you've, you know, gone off track for a hot minute, like I have found myself previously, like feeling guilt or shame or about things that I've done or things that I haven't done, or blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, but like just leaving the past in the past and forgiving yourself.
Speaker 1:And there's a thing that I've done at the moment, which is writing a letter from my inner child to who I am now and also vice versa, and also a full-on, just forgiveness letter, which is super powerful as well. Um, she shifts moment, um, writing like a forgiveness letter, um to myself, about, and I just listed all the things that I just need to forgive myself and let go of, because we all have done things that you know us now wouldn't have done or you know was out of alignment or not in like, out of congruency, out of our values and whatever. Um, yeah, like we all have made mistakes and we all have done things that we don't necessarily love, but you got to forgive yourself and not hold yourself back in that space. You're actually not going to actually be able to move forward. Um, you're always going to be pulled back to that space and, yeah, guilt and shame, that spiral and that loop we need. We need to just crunch it, break it and just forgive ourself and move forward absolutely.
Speaker 2:I did a breath work on this actually on Friday, which is crazy because that's what it was all about. It was like breathing through, forgiving yourself and just not being so hard on yourself and not having to carry that weight of that guilt, because that can really weigh you down and start that spiral of those negative thought patterns that we were speaking about earlier. But in this breath work, it it had you repeat things to yourself like such as I'm sorry, I forgive you, I love you, you're safe, like. And it was just like I'm sorry, I forgive you, I love you, you're safe. And I was just like this is actually so beautiful. So if you're not sure how to sort of kickstart that forgiveness of yourself, as Darleneine recommended, write that letter or start with doing something on insight timer you can use, you can go on and literally just type in, you know, forgiveness or self-love, or breath work self-love. You know, um, we have a lot of tools that are so beautifully able to be utilized and adapted to suit us and our needs.
Speaker 2:So that really was shifting for me, um, and then I went and like, wrote in my journal about it as well, so as a little follow-up. So, yeah, so many ways that you can cultivate it and we have the time. It's about breaking that addiction with our phones, um, which is hard. That's a hard one because that's where everything is at the moment. So that's something I'm really trying to work on. Um is building a healthy relationship with my phone and I've got my little toddy well, nearly not toddy anymore, but reminding me. You know, mom put your phone away all weekend and I was like, okay, and I did, and I was able to be more present in the moment instead of being so connected to my phone, like you know.
Speaker 1:Yeah yeah, amen, amen. So yeah, I need to work on it's all a walking progress, um but, yeah, it's the dopamine and the serotonin as well.
Speaker 2:Like you get a, like a hit, like a gratification from it, because you're, you know, you're getting that like that external sort of whether it's a text message from a guy or a woman sorry, or a woman or whether you know, I'm so conscious about that at the moment, like just there's people out there, they're probably listening that are in relationships with another woman as well.
Speaker 2:So yeah, yeah, or it's a like. You know looking at likes or you know, going through your social media and looking at past photos and reels and things of yourself. Um, instead of just being like what, what is today, what is present, you know we're, yeah, we just spend more time in our world, in our internal world. It's, it's good, it's worth it. We don't need anybody else to determine how worthy we are, because we are all worthy, all of us amen, yeah I'm sure we could bang on about this for like days and days.
Speaker 1:Um, we had written some notes and I think I've looked at them once yeah, I've like scanned over them, but I'm like we're in flow anyway and so funny, we um we had this process last week and we were like, we just felt like so robotic, because I was like trying to read off the notes and blah, blah, blah and it just doesn't work, like, or for my brain it just doesn't work. I'm like I, yeah, like you, you said before we got on, we have so much knowledge anyway, and like it just.
Speaker 2:It just goes to show we can talk for days honestly and we, yeah, we always had this thing, like when we started the podcast, about just letting whatever needed to come forward come forward, like that was always our big thing was just, yeah, like surrendering and trusting the process. And so then I think, when we hadn't done solo apps for a while, we were kind of like, oh, you know, we need to structure them it says me that I hate structure and I'm like, oh, I was like okay, and then I was like yeah in the nicest way possible, like I, just it wasn't.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it was not a vibe well, I tried the structure and it didn't work. Yeah, we try.
Speaker 2:You know, we see, but it's again trusting ourselves and coming back and knowing like we are worthy of being able to share the knowledge and the information that we have, and whatever is meant to come forward, it's coming. It's coming out. It's come out. Today.
Speaker 1:Somebody definitely needed to hear something that we just rambled on about today, for sure absolutely, and don't let this be like because I am someone that intellectualizes and this is a new thing that I've noticed like and other people probably from the outside have seen that, especially you, julia, because you're very good with like behavior and how the brain works and stuff like that is. I intellectualize so much like I am like information queen, I want to know everything, blah, blah, blah. And then I don't really embody it like I'll listen to like. Well, for years I've listened to podcasts and courses, personal development, all that stuff, and I've come to the realisation where I'm like I've read so many freaking books and I've read so many things and, yeah, my life has changed and yeah, my mindset has changed and I'm way more self-aware than what I ever was and still fall into old things and blah, blah, blah.
Speaker 1:Don't let this be like another podcast episode where you're just like, oh yeah, another one down and down the hat, like actually like intentionally listen and like, when you get off here, journal some things out and actually like reflect on the things that you have learned and start trying to embody it. And it's not going to be perfect. Like some things that we mentioned you will not like doing like some people. Just a whole note of breath work, but hey, yeah, so like meditation or vice versa, um, and just finding the things that actually do work, but like embodying it as well, because we can listen to so many, so many podcast episodes and audio books and read books and whatever, and go to so many personal development books, but if you're not walking out of there and trying to embody some of the things that you have learned, then like you're not going to. Nothing's going to change Like action, action, action, action.
Speaker 2:Exactly. And grace, give yourself grace, cause we all go through those hard times where we deviate from. You know ourselves, and you know we break our promises to ourselves and we don't show up for ourselves, and you know we lose that love for ourselves. And, um, this is when self-love is most crucial. You know, give yourself grace. You're human. Forgive yourself, like it all. It's just like again I feel like I was doing this cycle thing last time like it's just like a big cycle of always choose you. Everything starts with you, everything ends with you, everything is you.
Speaker 1:You are worthy you know what, just you know what popped in my head? The song from lion king, the circle of life. I just had that like come into my head.
Speaker 2:It's so okay, it's so true, exactly yeah I'm gonna go, I'm gonna pop that on was there anything else that you really wanted to dive into today, babe, on this epi, or?
Speaker 1:um, I think my main thing is I want to push forward is just to give yourself for everything and anything and just move forward like fuck the past, just keep moving forward and just just keep going like that's all you can do and just, yeah, just hold yourself at a higher, like you know, a higher pedestal, because you are a queen and you deserve to have all the dreams and life that you want, and don't let anyone dim your sparkle.
Speaker 2:Exactly, amen, amen and yeah, just give yourself grace and forgiveness. I think that's my main thing is, yeah, to give yourself that grace to continue carrying forward. You know, just because we make a mistake doesn't mean that we lose any of our own personal self-worth, and it doesn't matter what anybody else does. Friends, family, partners like you are worthy of your own self-love.
Speaker 1:So yeah, and you're the only one in control of that, like your partner can give you so much love and your family can tell you all these things. But if you don't believe that, then it's just going to be water off a duck's back, really, at the end of the day.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, start believing in yourself yeah, yeah and um, that's the other thing like to make sure like you've got like those foundations, write that down you know, when we write things down and in a state of crisis or emotional dysregulation, we can refer back to those things, because we might not be able to think of those things when we're in fight, flight, fawn, freeze. You know, when we are in that sort of state, it helps to have things written. Whether you write it in the journal, whether you write it in your notes app, you know whether it's your. You call it your self-love tree or your self-love toolkit or your self-love emergency kit. Just make sure that you have things on there that you can refer to when we do deviate, so you can remind yourself. You know it can be like, oh, I actually haven't been loving myself and you know I don't even remember what actually makes me feel good, and then you've actually got them written down in this little list. So list on list, on list on list.
Speaker 2:People, but we love you and we see you. We know how challenging, like how crazy, navigating life can be. We understand the ebbs and the flows. We go through them. Um, we go through them too, all the time and you know, sometimes we share them and sometimes we don't, and that's not because we don't want other people to see them, but it's just because we are doing a lot of internal work and reflection and love on ourselves and you know, um it's about yeah, we do want to share those things, but it's also about not, we don't need to all the time right.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I think we've both come to that realization as well. Like I do share a lot on social media, but like I'm I think we spoke about this last week as well it's like there's we don't need to share every itty gritty bit of our life, and some of it does come down to privacy at the end of the day as well.
Speaker 1:Like, we have shared a lot about our story that we'll open to share at the start of the podcast and stuff like that. But like if we were to share everything about what happens in our life because we are solo mums and we do navigate it on our own, um, and I deal with, you know, the kids, dad, um, and you know things like that, um, like the whole world doesn't even know that, because it would literally just be like one of those facebook groups, like just whinging about every part of their life, every facet, and we're not that we wind, but we do vent sometimes. Um, yeah, it just wouldn't be, it wouldn't be great.
Speaker 1:So we will tell you the lessons and we will give you some things and you know, advice and stuff from what we learned during the eras, because I feel like even even the detours, um, are divinely orchestrated in so many ways, sometimes like because, yeah, every time you come back and you're like, thank, like in six months time I'm gonna be like, thank god, I went through the last six months because this is what I have gained from that um.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and you never new devils at every level exactly, and there's no slack to people who do feel like they want to share those all the nitty-gritties like if that's what you feel like you want to do, you do you.
Speaker 2:But I suppose we're just saying that's why we haven't been probably as present on our own personal stories being like blah, blah, blah. Well, me personally I can speak for myself, but, um, yeah, because I've just been taking the lessons and learning and growing and making changes and evolving and I know I know some stories and some things can help other people out and people resonate with that. But at this era and this stage of my life, that's just, you know, that's something in my self-love toolkit is just, yeah, giving myself all of the validation amen amen, queens.
Speaker 1:Well, we're gonna hop off soon, because I'm actually sitting in my car, because tech has been teching and I am sweating I'm gonna take a screenshot because I've not actually seen her face the whole time.
Speaker 2:It's been really weird. Um, so she's got. She's so cute she's you're doing like the cutest little pose as well. Um, in her frozen, her frozen position on the phone. It's been frozen the whole time, but I didn't want to tell her um, but it's so cute, I'll send it yeah, it's the most cutest.
Speaker 1:I thought you were gonna get my cues going like I'm hot, I'm like fanning myself, I'm sweating, because I didn't want to have to see you. Oh my god, it is so hot in this car. I need to go get a bruce juice that's dedication.
Speaker 2:that is dedication and that's also self-love getting yourself a boost juice, absolutely. Anyways, we love the EW community so much. If you have listened to our episodes and you have not yet, please go and give us a rating, give us a star, give us some feedback. You know we really want to try to reach as many women as possible in the community, so share on your stories. And for all of you that have been, or sliding in our dms or, you know, been interacting with us, um, we are so grateful, like every single one we celebrate. So thank you from the bottom of our hearts to all of you who have, and lots of love, lots of love.
Speaker 1:Bye, beautiful humans.
Speaker 2:We hope you feel inspired to take back your power. Thank you for listening into the EWP Party with Jules and Day. We want to challenge you to share this party with someone you love. Let's get all women involved. Follow us on Insta at empoweringwomen underscore project, facebook and TikTok at empoweringwomenproject.
Speaker 1:We invite you to interact with us on our socials, our threads and in our DMs. We are open to collaborating and invite you to interact with us on our socials, our threads and in our DMs. We are open to collaborating and invite you to reach out if you feel inspired to be a guest on our EWP podcast. Remember, you are the creator of your reality. We encourage you to start believing in yourself and the magic of the universe.