Unfiltered Christian Podcast
Welcome to "Unfiltered Christian," a podcast where faith meets authenticity. Join me as we share the raw and real experiences of our Christian journey, navigating the highs and lows of life. Through heartfelt testimonials and candid conversations, we'll explore the challenges and triumphs of living a life of faith. Whether you're struggling or soaring, this podcast aims to uplift, encourage, and remind you that you're never alone in your walk with Christ. Tune in for genuine insights, relatable stories, and a community of believers striving to grow together.
Unfiltered Christian Podcast
Ep 10 - Forgiving Others for Your Own Freedom
What if the key to your own spiritual freedom lies in forgiving those who've wronged you? Join us in a heartfelt exploration of anger, hate, and forgiveness as we commemorate our 10th episode milestone. We turn a listener's poignant question into a deep conversation about the liberating power of forgiveness—not just for the offender, but for our own growth. Through personal stories, we unpack how prayer, fasting, and an honest dialogue with a higher power can guide us through this challenging process, and emphasize the importance of releasing malice from our hearts to walk in true forgiveness.
Navigating hurt in both personal and professional relationships can be complex, especially when it seems unrelenting. We share insights on how to manage ongoing pain, highlighting the importance of reaching out for external support like HR or counseling. Forgiveness is more of a journey than a destination—one that requires time, grace, and sometimes setting boundaries even with those closest to us. Trust, once broken, can be rebuilt by leaning on divine guidance and understanding that healing is a gradual process, not an instant fix.
Anger can be a heavy burden, and our conversation sheds light on the exhausting nature of carrying such emotions. Personal experiences reveal how letting go is a gradual journey requiring self-reflection, patience, and sometimes professional help. We discuss practical steps toward healing, such as journaling, which offers a therapeutic way to process emotions and find peace. We believe that seeking divine guidance, embracing patience, and extending grace to ourselves are crucial steps toward inner tranquility and healthier relationships. Join us as we extend our love and peace to listeners worldwide, inviting you to tune in and connect with us again soon.
Thank you for Listening
To ask us a question email us @ unfilteredchristian1@gmail.com
Welcome to Unfiltered Christian with Cece and Shea.
Speaker 2:Come and join us on an authentic journey through the highs and lows of our Christian faith.
Speaker 1:Where we'll be holding nothing back. Hi guys, welcome to Unfiltered Christian podcast. I'm Mimi.
Speaker 2:And I'm Shea.
Speaker 1:And drumroll. Today is our 10th episode. Can you believe it?
Speaker 2:Woo, 10th episode. Hmm, wow, wow.
Speaker 1:Okay, I was literally counting and I'm like, oh, it seems. I don't know why it seems like more, but that's what I was just gonna say I was like hang on.
Speaker 2:I'm trying to be excited, but I feel like we've done more yeah, no, this is literally our 10th episode. 10th episode wow, okay, in double digits. Yeah, I think it's because we talk too much, but yeah, so it seems like this is literally our 10th episode.
Speaker 1:10th episode Wow, okay, double digits. Yeah, I think it's because we talk too much, but yeah, so it seems like.
Speaker 2:I think it's because we double up as well sometimes, so it feels like more. But, okay, 10th episode Check us out.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Well done to you guys and well done to us. Amen, amen.
Speaker 1:And we've had an email come through and we're sorry that, um, we took so long, but we are here now and I'm trying to find it, even though I just had it, but we was having some technical difficulties, um.
Speaker 2:Technical difficulties. Technology will always fail us, but never mind.
Speaker 1:We move.
Speaker 2:Okay, so it's two questions.
Speaker 1:How do I get rid of hate? Slash anger.
Speaker 2:And how to forgive the people that hurt you. Ooh no pressure. Eh no pressure.
Speaker 1:Number one everybody goes through this, yes.
Speaker 2:Yes, yeah, you remember that you're not the only person that has been through this, going through this or that will go through this. It's just, yeah, it's just a place that you go through, but, trust me, you'll make it to the end. That's the first thing we will say. For sure, it's a process.
Speaker 1:Which one should we answer first? Which one is?
Speaker 2:more easier to answer.
Speaker 1:How do I? Get rid of hate and anger.
Speaker 2:Oh no, never mind.
Speaker 1:The second one's about forgiveness, right forgiveness right, yeah, how do I forgive the people that hurt me?
Speaker 2:okay, I'm gonna roll with that one. I feel like that one is slightly, slightly easier. I'm not saying forgiveness is easy oh sorry.
Speaker 1:And it says let me just read the whole thing how to forgive the? How do you forgive the people that hurt you where to the point of you can no longer forgive? How do you trust again and forgive if they're both hard? Um, that is hard, they're both. Her question which, which one should we go with?
Speaker 2:I'm rolling with it. I still want to roll with a forgiveness question. Okay, the reason why I say that is because I feel, like me and you, have been on this journey of forgiveness over the years and I feel like we have been through our battles, um, we have prayed hard, fasted about it, um, and I think that's what we'll say. I think, first of all, don't think that you cannot get to the point where you can't forgive that person. Remember that you're not forgiving them for them. You're forgiving them for them. You're forgiving them for yourself, right? It's for your freedom of malice on your heart and hate. You don't want to walk with that. You don't want to carry that. You are a child of Elohim and this is not how he created you to be. He wants us to walk in forgiveness, as hard as it can be, because we don't know the scenario of what you're trying to forgive that person from and, like I said, it's not easy. But if you look at that person and what they did to you and you think about forgiving them, you're not going to forgive them. You have to think about your path with God and the way that he wants you to be as his child, and you need to think about forgiving them for yourself, for your salvation, for your everlasting life. Not like, I know it sounds selfish, but that's how you have to start off with it. That's what I had to do. When it comes mentally, that's how I had to start with it comes mentally, that's how I had to start with it before I can consider dealing with that person. Start with this part first, though you don't have to jump into anything with them, or like you're going to start chatting tomorrow or whatever. You need to work on this journey yourself, with the Lord, with you. That's what you need to do, side by side with the Lord. Come to him about it, fast about it, pray about it and be honest with him as well.
Speaker 2:Don't be sitting there like, oh, you know, like you know, like I want to forgive this person because no, like, say like this person, I can't stand them, like they've hurt me, they've done this to me, they've done that to me. Let it all out, cry it out. If you need to cry it out, you know, depending on how you express your emotions. I'm not saying go out and be angry and start punching walls, no, but really be honest and have that moment with Elohim and just let him know how you feel, because you don't want to continue carrying it.
Speaker 2:And I'm telling you, when you get to that point of eventually letting go, like genuinely letting go, because don't think by not talking to this person like I said, it depends on who it is because I had to go through forgiveness, of forgiving a parent, and that was not easy and I thought that, okay, I'd forgiven them. I went through this journey where I didn't have hate in my heart anymore or malice in my heart, and I thought that, okay, I'd forgiven them. I went through this journey where I didn't have hate in my heart anymore or malice in my heart, and I thought, cool, I've forgiven them. But I wasn't talking to them and in the moment, yeah right, exactly.
Speaker 2:So it seemed great, right. And then, as soon as I had that conversation with that person and I had that, I mean genuinely saw them, and with my parents, should I say I saw, oh my gosh, I feel like, oh, I've missed them um, I just felt this complete weight physically just come straight off my shoulders, like I can't describe it. And that's when I knew I had finally forgiven that person a hundred percent. Right, mimi, I'll let you go um so funny.
Speaker 1:I did a study on this.
Speaker 1:Um can't remember it, though you sure did, I remember because I'm going through this with a person, um, who I haven't done anything to. In my eyes, I have to say that in my eyes I feel like I am right now. It takes me back to the Lord's Prayer which is in Luke 11. I think it starts from verse 1. Yeah, verses 4 forgive us for our sins as we forgive others. And sometimes I have to put myself in my own shoes. If, if that, if I did xyz to that person and I've now turned over a new leaf, I would want them to forgive me. And it's so hard sometimes. It really is hard, I think, when you're on your path with Yahweh and you know he hates sin but loves the sinner.
Speaker 1:None of us are perfect. We all hurt people, unfortunately, whether it be by our words, our actions, because a lot of things is done out of emotions, and I think it's the fact about not ignoring your emotion totally, but it's like, okay, I feel hurt. Have you spoke to that person? Do they know what they're doing is wrong, have you? Or sometimes some people can't see what they've done wrong. So you have to bring in a second person, like somebody that both of you know to like, try and address the situation, cause I've done wrong. So you have to bring in a second person, like somebody that both of you know to like, try and address the situation, because I've done that as well. Oh, I've had a lot of forgiveness to do. I've done that as well, where I felt like I was being attacked, that I needed to bring somebody else in that knows us both, to be the mediator that's not going to take sides but can hear where both of us is coming from, and to be able to pull us both up where we've been wrong.
Speaker 1:I also think it's hard when, if you're because we don't know the situation. I think it's hard if you're in a workplace yeah, when somebody's doing something that continues to hurt you, then go to HR, and I know that not everybody has a HR department. That's another thing, that's something that Shay can talk about. But it's about to keep trying and sometimes you have to distance yourself to protect yourself and pray for that person, because that's what I've started doing. Like people that hurt me, I pray for them. Before I never used to pray for them, but now I pray for them because the bible also says for they know not what they do. So the same way how he, how yahweh winks at my ignorance. I try to wink at other peoples, but I still pray for them, and when I feel like any negative, anything negative coming up, I try and pray. Sometimes I'm just being honest, because sometimes that prayer don't come nowhere near my head, but when I've catched myself I will pray but, it's not easy it isn't.
Speaker 2:I feel like it's. It's. It's not a instant click your finger, um kind of uh, situation or scenario like there. You can just. You know we're giving you tools of how to go through this, because I don't think that you can just. You can't just pray that prayer today and forgive that person tomorrow. It is a process and it takes time and you need to give yourself time, you need to give yourself grace. You know it really a process. I thought it could be that way. You know, when I used to pray about forgiving people, I didn't realize I actually needed that time, because so much damage could have been done that that happened over time, right? So if damage was created or happened over time, what makes you think that you can forgive that person instantly? That also has to happen over time. So it's just about taking each day as it comes.
Speaker 2:Um, like we said, we don't know the scenario, so it's hard to like know if it's a family member, a friend, a spouse, um, it's really, really difficult. Um, because, like, the answer can differ, can like, according to who it is. Because, like, if it is your spouse, that's like, that's really tough, because that person you're seeing every single day. Um, and it is a. That's definitely a process. Um, also, what just came to my head is um, consider counseling. Um, maybe you need someone just completely neutral to help you talk it out. Um, to help you just be able to sort out your thoughts, like sometimes trying to do it in your own will. It's not, yeah, it's not the way forward, it doesn't. It doesn't work out as well, like if you feel like you've tried and you've tried and it's not going the way you want it to. First of all, of course, you seek the lord first, um, above anything else, because, trust me, he will help you. But even through counseling, he also will support you through that and help you to work things out that you didn't realise. You know, open your eyes to things that you didn't realise and that could also really help as well. So there's so many different things that you can do, so many avenues that you can go.
Speaker 2:But I agree with what Mimi said in regards to like distancing yourself, because I've recently had to do that with a family member. That's continued to hurt me, even though I have so much respect for them and love for them. I feel like you have to really be careful, because you can keep because you want to. That person can keep hurting you and you can keep putting yourself in that position to get hurt, not like on purpose, but because of the love you have for them and because of the care and respect you have for them. You end up putting yourself in that position all the time and I am your the queen of, like, blocking out hurt. I'll tell you that for free, like I'm the queen of that. So that's what that's. What was that?
Speaker 1:That's how I'm meant to be, you know do you think so?
Speaker 2:blocking out hurt?
Speaker 1:I think in a sense of not blocking it out, but in terms of like being able to not the block out but to forgive right, but there's two differences. Right, but I mean in a sense like the difference between me and her is like somebody can hurt her, like last week and then this week it's like nothing didn't happen and I'm like, oh boy, how is she? Doing this Like this only happened like six days ago.
Speaker 1:But without forget the blocking. It's good to forgive, to be able to help one another and, with what you're saying, brings trust. Because I spoke about trust, trust is given freely, because when you meet somebody you might be a bit skeptical, but you don't know them, but you give them trust until they hurt you and then you take it away.
Speaker 2:That's true.
Speaker 1:And then it's like kind of like you've got to earn it back, but then you're scared. Then it's like, kind of like you've got to earn it back, but then you're scared because it's like you've got all of these speculations in your head. What if they do this? What if they do that? What if this?
Speaker 1:happens that happens like. I'm excellent for that because I'm quite logical. So I, my mind is like a, b, c, d, e, f, g for but different things, um, but trust is very hard. But that's why the bible says trust in the lord with all your heart and lean on your own understanding. Because we don't understand our understanding, our understanding.
Speaker 2:Sometimes it's not good, because we are naturally selfish people so we always think about self, first um yeah, maybe that's how you can start as well, like, make sure your trust is in the Lord first, and eventually he will guide you. He will guide your heart towards trusting that person where needs be or like through the process of trusting them back again. If that makes sense, like it will come gradually. Once you put your trust in him, he will guide the rest of that, um, literally, and like I said over time, over time, don't rush it, don't stress it, don't think it has to be by next week or whatever.
Speaker 2:It is with me, like what mimi said, it is all great, don't get twisted, but I it creates, uh, trauma for me. So I have triggers and I don't remember what happened because of, like, blocking, slash, forgetting what had happened. And then I'll have a trigger and I'll be like oh, oh, my days, like where's this from? And I'll generally forget what they did, but I'll have a trigger, someone else could trigger me and I could just end up in this weird place, um, so that's why I say just take your time. It's not easy at all, but we really do pray that you're able to get through this and know that we're here and you can always send us back any follow-up questions in regards to this subject.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I think for me the text that has been on my heart this year is matthew 6, verses um 14 to 15, and it says for if you forgive men their trespasses, your heavenly father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive men their trespasses, neither will your heavenly forgot father forgive your trespasses. And I always try to put that in my head, because we're always asking, like every day, we're like lord, forgive me for this, forgive me for that. So who am I to not forgive his child? Do you know what?
Speaker 1:I mean yeah um, because we've all been a bad friend, a bad sister, a bad, whatever it may be, throughout some time in our life, um, to somebody else. We didn't know how much it hurt them, and that's why I literally said that sometimes we think that we haven't hurt somebody, but we could be hurting them. Why their reaction is what it is until, um, do you say what you say? Like I can use me and shay, I'm quite blunt, so I could, shay could, come and tell me something. And because my response is blunt, I didn't realize that my bluntness could hurt her. Does that make sense? So, something similar so she might withdraw from saying certain things because it's just like you know what I hear, where you're coming from, but there's no love in it. So then I might think why is she acting a certain way? But really and truly, if there's no communication, you wouldn't know what it is.
Speaker 1:And then now, both people are speculating things, so something, something so minor sometimes could come back so big yeah, definitely all right.
Speaker 2:Well, hopefully you've gotten a lot from what we've just mentioned and you can always listen back and make notes of these things so that you can have it and then you know you can go through the list and try those things, not just once. You know, keep going, and we just pray that Elohim will really help you through this process of forgiveness.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I want to leave you with the text Romans 12, 12. And the text Romans 12 12 rejoicing hope, patience in tribulation, continuing steadfastly in prayer, distributing to the needs of saints, given hospitality and um, I was trying to find a bible text about the fruits of the spirit because that links into both.
Speaker 2:um, both both questions what they've asked let me see, because that's our favorite over here. Oh okay, you guys know that one I don't. I don't think I know the text, but we do like that um that one here. We speak about it a lot at home in the meantime, as she finds it.
Speaker 1:I also want to talk about it on the other side um, to people that have been hurt. Um, or you have hurt somebody and then you just realize that you've hurt someone and you go to apologize. I feel like sometimes, because they haven't accepted the apology how we wanted them to, because it took up, it took a lot of courage for us to come and say sorry or admit our faults. That, again, with one of the fruits of the spirit is patience, that they have to also take off all the layers. Like imagine an onion and before you was just like the little thing in the middle, and now you've put layers upon layers upon layers because of your protecting yourself, you don't have trust, the continuous hurt. So now they've got to unpeel all those layers of the onion. And so when somebody doesn't accept your apology, don't take it the wrong way. You've apologized and you just continue to pray for that person that they will find it in their heart to forgive you, like.
Speaker 1:One thing that we need to realise is that sometimes, when we ask for forgiveness and the Lord tells us to go and speak to that person or go and forgive that person, like you have done what you've been instructed to do and only the Lord can change them. Because with Shea and our dad like she's in a more better place than she is with her dad now. With Shea and our dad like she's in a more better place than she is with her dad now. But I think for me it's like I've I'm still on that journey of letting go and accepting my dad for who he is, because only the Lord can change him. Because of how stubborn he is. It's just like I've now finally accepted him for him, and whenever the Lord decides to change him is within his time and not my time wow, the scripture is battling me today, tell you that oh fruits of the spirit yeah, it's so weird.
Speaker 2:Okay, found it is galatians, chapter 5, verses 22, um yeah yeah, but the fruit of the spirit is love, oh god now I was thinking, how many there were yeah, so there's love, joy, peace, long suffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Where have I got uh?
Speaker 1:nine yeah yeah so he even knew about what we will go through. Like you know, life will be joy. Sometimes you have peace, sometimes you need to be patient, sometimes you're gonna have long suffering, and the long suffering a lot of us don't like to go through because we are hurt and we get it definitely but I also feel like sometimes I'm just gonna use money. I always seem to use money in it. But sometimes I'm just going to use money. I always seem to use money in it, but anyway.
Speaker 2:I'm just going to use money.
Speaker 1:Like sometimes, the Lord wants to put things in place for us to learn from. So if I always borrow, somebody money and they can never pay me back. But then I see them on holiday and I see them doing whatever. It's then my choice to be like you. You know what this person has poor money management, let me not help. Or if they're saying they're hungry, prefer to buy them food and send it to their house, or do things another way so you're not hurt drastically.
Speaker 1:You know Because sometimes money can make people be like. This. Person owes me £200, but they're outside and living their best life.
Speaker 2:It's true, you know it's true and you're like but I need that 200 pound now.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's deep.
Speaker 1:So to sum up what we just said with this one as forgiveness. First forgiving yourself, because, as Shay said, you need to give yourself time, patience and you need to be kind to yourself. Healing is important. Nothing happens overnight, so pray for healing, pray for forgiveness you can talk to your father about anything. Be real with him. And then patience. We really need to pay and pray for patience.
Speaker 2:Yeah definitely definitely yeah, yeah. So what was our first question now?
Speaker 1:How do I get rid of hate and anger?
Speaker 2:Do you know what I will say? I feel like some of the answers we gave For the forgiveness question Is quite similar For this as well. It's so broad. For this as well. It's so broad because what do you have hate and anger about? Is it about your life? Is it about the way others have treated you? Is it about do you know what I mean? It's like it's so broad. This question, once again.
Speaker 2:You can't get rid of that overnight. You're not just going to wake up and be like I don't hate anymore, because I went through a long time of I wouldn't say hate, but I know what it's like to be angry. I feel like I used to wake up every morning, fine, but as soon as I stepped outside, I was angry. And I feel like I had to be angry as a protection for myself. It was a defence mechanism. My face was always screwed up. I was like no, I'm going to like people are going to take advantage if I'm always smiling Like they're going to think I'm a mug. Like they're going to think no, I'm going to like people are going to take advantage if I'm always smiling Like they're going to think I'm a mug. Like they're going to think, yeah, yeah, this girl. Do you know what I mean? Because I look different. So I'm like I need to have this angry demeanor so that people don't take the mick out of me.
Speaker 2:So I know what it's like to walk with that anger and it gets exhausting. Do you know how much energy that you're putting into being angry? Oh, my gosh, it physically. It does actually physically, um, make you exhausted. I'm not even joking with you, because when I start, when I just decided that I don't, I don't, I no longer want to be angry, because I just can't, I've just I've had enough. Like I, I felt so much more rested. You know, like it's a lot to carry on your shoulders like, think about it, um, don't be carrying that for somebody else. Do you know how much like there's other people who have, may have hurt you and I that has made you angry, are getting along along with life, like they don't even remember what they did and you're there carrying it. You don't want your life to continue being that every day, like every day is so precious, and you don't want to have that in your heart every day.
Speaker 2:Now, once again, like I know it's not easy and, like I said, mine came with time. I think I spent maybe 10 years. I'm gonna say about 10 years because when I decided to make this decision, I remember how old I was. So I'm gonna say for about 10 years or so, I spent being angry and I'd had enough. I was like I can't do this anymore. What's the point? It's not making any difference. Nobody cares. Like you know, what am I doing to myself? What am I doing to my health, mentally like physically? What am I actually doing to myself?
Speaker 2:yeah so think about it. What are you doing to yourself, you know? Is this how you want to be every day? Like? You have to start telling yourself this is this how you want to be every day? Like you have to start telling yourself this is not how I want to be anymore. Like, talk to the Lord every day. Lord, I'm angry, but I don't want to be this way. I have hate in my heart. I don't want to walk in hate in my heart. He doesn't want you to have that on your heart at all at all, at all.
Speaker 2:Think about how it affects those around you. You know what it could be causing to those around you, without you even realizing, by the way, because you could be expressing this to others and not realize that you're doing it. You could be pushing others away. Yeah, right, exactly. You could be pushing somebody, like people, away and not realize you're doing that. I was doing that because I had so much anger that I couldn't even recognize the great people in front of me. Do you know what I mean? So you can't even recognize the greatness and the blessings you have in front of you because of how you're feeling, how you're walking with that hate and anger in your heart. It really isn't healthy.
Speaker 2:And once again, I will also say seek counseling. There's nothing wrong with seeking counselling, trust me. It's going to help you through that. It's going to help you to gain the tools that you need. It's not going to take you out of the anger like that, but it's going to give you the tools and it is going to give you that release.
Speaker 2:I'm telling you from now, like I've been through counseling, I've been through the process of it and it has brought me so far, for, like the little things that used to, I'm still going through my processes. I'm still you know what I mean like nothing is. I don't know. You know, I always wonder, like, can we really fix everything? I don't think that's possible. No, we can't. He can, the lord, but he can't. The Lord can't, but yeah well, he can. But you'll never be quote, unquote perfect or whatever, until Jesus comes again, like you're never going to do. You know what I mean. We're never going to be perfect, so don't even think that you're going to be this perfect piece of human, but at least you can gain the tools and you can walk with the peace that you need. Pray for peace, oh my gosh. Pray for peace, that is number one. Pray for the, the quieting um of your mind you know to be. Is that the word I'm trying to say? Quiet, is that a word?
Speaker 1:there's a bible text actually peace and yeah about, about, yeah, yeah, right there you go.
Speaker 2:Pray for peace, pray for understanding, let your mind be quiet.
Speaker 1:You know that peace like just, oh my gosh, pray for that peace is so beautiful, I'm telling you, and it's not easy to god, gives us peace which is um, and the peace of god, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your heart and minds through jesus christ and then philippians 4, verses 6 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, every situation, by prayer and petition with thanksgiving, present your request to the lord amen, hey, that's me done.
Speaker 2:Scripture covers it all. Like literally those two scriptures hits the hammer on the nail right there meditate on those.
Speaker 1:When I'm angry, I I like to be alone. I stay by myself. Um, what I have learned recently is to tell people around me that I'm not in an okay space. If you can give me some time, so, because obviously people will know that your aura has changed or what you're going through, or um, especially like people that know you it's, I think it's good to let them know that you're not in an okay place, um, and you just need time for yourself because life happens. It happens to all of us. Um, people tick us off doing the world that we live in tick us off. There's a lot of things. Um, because that has helped me a lot. Just to just stay by myself sometimes, because, unfortunately, I'm saying this because we're unfiltered.
Speaker 1:I don't like to apologize. So if I'm annoyed and you aggravate me and I say something I actually mean what I'm gonna say, I apologize. I hurt your feelings. However, like you aggravated me, do you know what I mean? So I've learned to say I'm not in a good place because of X, y, z. Can you just give me some time?
Speaker 1:And one thing that I keep I'm trying to tell myself which is biblical is Ephesians. Look, I'm loving Ephesians right now, ephesians 4, verses 25. And it says therefore, sorry, ephesians 4, verses 26. And it says be angry and do not sin, do not let the sun go down on your wrath. And with that being said, it's whatever we're carrying today we shouldn't be bringing into tomorrow. And it's my daily thing that I'm trying to do, that I'm really trying, I'm praying that whoever has upset me today let me pray about it, for today is today and tomorrow is tomorrow. Tomorrow is literally a new day, like it's Monday, monday. Let Monday stay in Monday. We're about to go into Tuesday. Don't bring Monday into Tuesday, and so forth.
Speaker 1:So I'm really really trying to do that with anger, like when people annoy me. It's hard, I'm praying about it, but I'm trying to learn this Bible verse and just be like you know what. I can't let the sun go down and still be angry, like I need to find something, whether listen to some gospel music, pray or whatever, or even try to talk to the person who has upset me and try and try and talk it out, or try to just not let the sun go down into the next day with this same problem, because, especially when it comes to friends and family, if you're angry with somebody and they passed away that night, you would have said oh, do you know what I wish I sorted it out. If that person means a lot to you, do you know what I mean? So I always try to try and let it go, but it's hard, it is hard.
Speaker 2:That's some great tips actually tips as well, very practical.
Speaker 1:I'm trying to think if I ever hated somebody, how do I get rid of hate?
Speaker 2:that's a hard one, I don't. I don't know if I've ever hated anybody, and the reason why I say that is because I grew up with my mum always not liking the word hate.
Speaker 2:Yeah um, and she's a strong word, like yes, a strong word yeah, you dislike, yeah, so it's like in my mind I don't think I've ever hated anybody um, because I've always tried to be conscious of that, if that makes sense. Like I might not like you, but I've always tried to not let my heart get to that point of hate just because I just feel like that's, that's a lot, um, but that's just me saying me personally. Um, because I don't know, um what you could have been through that has caused you to be in this place, and I get why you can hate somebody or a group of people for whatever could have happened, you know. But yeah, that's really a tough one, because I don't think I've felt hate myself like even with the stuff that I've been through with my dad.
Speaker 1:Yeah, now. I'm thinking about it. I'm thinking like, because when I used to see this person, I used to feel rage and like I could be fine, and then they could just walk past and it's just like yeah, that's hate.
Speaker 2:I keep seeing them yeah.
Speaker 1:But it never, always used to be like that.
Speaker 1:It was the continuous lying and them using me that it built over time yeah and I think, when you I think that's another thing that when you realize, okay, do you know what I'm beginning to feel this way to pray. But this happened when I was a teenager. But I could say like, oh no, I don't think. But no, because when I used to see them, I used to be angry, I used to like it. It was just like why are they here? Or why are they coming here? Like yeah, and to be honest, I thought I would never get over that hurt, that hatred. And then let me tell you, it took three years, you know, and some people might be like, oh, three years is nothing, but when you're dealing with pain, three years is a lot it is a lot yeah it took me three years, especially if it keeps coming to your mind every day.
Speaker 1:And they were local to me. So it wasn't an out of sight, out of mind thing because, well, it was when I didn't see them. But when people used to talk about them, I'm like why, why are you bringing that person up like let's change the subject? Or? But it's like, yeah, and I I prayed about it, one that Yahweh would remove that hurt and pain from me, that now, when somebody says their name, I haven't bumped into them in years. But when I have seen them, like we don't talk, we walk past each other, but I don't feel anything. I don't feel like upset't, feel like upset, hurt, like it's just fine. So I think, with everything, again, it's patience time yeah as well.
Speaker 2:If both scenarios that we spoke about, both questions, you can see that you need time with each thing definitely.
Speaker 1:I'm just trying to find a Bible verse.
Speaker 2:You continue talking honey. Oh no, I was just saying that, you know. I think that's the key thing, or the key point for me to make Like it's not going to happen overnight. You're not going to get over everything. Give yourself grace as well. You know, like this person has called you For you to hate somebody, I feel like they've caused you some very deep hurt and it's not something you can just get rid of. Tomorrow. Be like yep, I don't hate this person anymore, I'm good, move on with life, because if you do do that, that means you have not healed, and healing is very important as well. You definitely need to heal, um, like mimi said, um, it's so important to pray for healing, um, so just keep going, take each day as it comes, don't overwhelm yourself.
Speaker 2:Give yourself that grace and yeah, it's gonna be the hurt people that hurt people oh, definitely, I was gonna say that actually, that came up, that thought came up to me before. Definitely don't be the hurt person that hurts people. Um, and that's what I was saying before in regards to, like you don't know how that could be affecting other people around you. Like, really be aware, try to be more aware, definitely that you are spitting out upset or anger towards the people in your life that do not deserve it. Yeah, really, try to be aware of that, because it's so important. In the midst of you working on your healing, you could really lose some important people in your life because of what you're going through right here. So really work on not pushing those people away Because, trust me, you're going to need them.
Speaker 1:And you also got to remember that we're dealing with ourself and trying to make ourself better each day and we have a lot of unra, unraveling of things that we no longer want in our life and we know, that when we look at like forgiveness, hate, anger, I think a lot of those things was taught from us, from our parents, and what I mean by that is not them intentionally teaching us.
Speaker 1:But I'll give it an example. Not all all of us heard this, but some of us said, heard this like children are so pure, children will forgive, like they could be getting bullied or whatever, and it's just like I want you to be my friend, like they don't care, they just want your friendship.
Speaker 1:But then, our parents will teach us. Like you know, if that person hits you, you hit them back. Or if that person does this, like you know, if that person hits you, you hit them back. Or if that person does this, you. It's like this tick for tack that we're trying to unravel all of that. So then you know that you don't hurt people that we love, but people who we don't really care about. If they hurt us, it's all right to hurt them, but that's so a lot of that we have to like get rid of as well yeah, we have to undo, yeah, yeah, undo this.
Speaker 2:um, this negative that's just been built up over generations. That's why I always try to tell my son, like you know, that's why if I say to him someone does something to him and I say, go and tell the teacher, he's like, no, I'm gonna get in trouble. And I'm like that's okay, you're not doing anything to hurt them. But they've hurt you and you. You need to go tell a grown-up Like you can't keep getting hurt because of that. But because I've never taught him to be like, oh, yeah, you go kick them back or you go do whatever, in his mind it's like, no, I don't want to do anything to hurt them, you know, because I don't believe in that at all. You know that's not the way you want to.
Speaker 2:Um, that's not the mindset you want to put into a young child, because it will carry through into adulthood that like, okay, like my mom always said that I can, I can just tit for tat, like you said, didn't it? I can do that. So you go into your, you know, into your teens and into your growing adulthood thinking that that's okay. So, yeah, it is important definitely to try not to do that Really really do, because it just doesn't help anything as well, and especially if you're like I'm sure you're like a genuine and loving person, it's going to hurt you as well, like hurting others. Do you know what I mean? Because you're just doing it out of emotion. You're doing it because you've been hurt and it will hurt you as well. So it's like you're just adding more to what you're already going through.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but we really do pray. That Was the question from the same individual or two different. Okay, well, we pray that you are definitely able to work through these um challenges, because they're definitely. It's some deep and challenging stuff here that you're going through, and we just pray that Elohim really helps you through this um. I'm actually going to pray, I feel impressed to pray, so I'm going to pray for you.
Speaker 1:Can I just leave the one text Go on. We pray to close. In the Bible, in Mark, when the scribes asked Jesus what is his greatest commandments, he gave two greatest commandments. One was to love him and only him. But the second one that he gave um, which is in mark 12, verses 31, is. The second one is you shall love your neighbour as yourself and with we, we even.
Speaker 1:We even get mad and annoyed at ourselves, but we always try to. We love ourselves. Some of us, um, we must all love ourselves and we wouldn't want somebody to treat us badly, so to try and love the person that hurt us as ourself. And I think sometimes what we need to look at is we're not here to please man, we're here to please Yahweh. So even though other people might say like, oh, you're silly for doing that or why you're doing that, the Lord sees what you're doing and you're doing the correct thing, which is loving your neighbor as yourself. And I think sometimes outside society can make us feel like we're doing wrong when we're actually doing what the lord has called us to do. And I speak to myself when I'm saying this, because sometimes easier said than done, but practice makes perfect and when you fall down, it's okay, just get your amen well said that's me done.
Speaker 2:Right, okay, so should I pray.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that's fine, I'm ready. Okay, dear Heavenly and Wonderful Father, we give you thanksgiving and we give you thanksgiving, lord, for this brand new day. I want we give you thanksgiving, lord, for this brand new day. I want to thank you, father Lord, for this moment that me and Mimi have shared. Heavenly Father, lord, and thank you so much for the person that sent in their questions. Thank you, father Lord, that they have recognized, heavenly Father Lord, where they're in need of you and, father Lord, they have reached out for help. That's a big, big step that they've taken and so, father, we just want to thank you, father Lord, for them, and thank you, father Lord, for them taking this step today.
Speaker 2:Heavenly Father Lord, we just pray, lord, that you may please help them, lord, through what they're going through. Lord, with forgiveness and with hate and with anger. Father, lord in heaven, this is your child and Lord, they're in need of you. Heavenly Father, lord, cleanse them in freedom of these things, bring healing upon them, gracious God in heaven, and give them the tools, lord in heaven, that they can use daily to help them to go, get through or go through the things that they are facing.
Speaker 2:Heavenly Father Lord, may they no longer have control over them and, Heavenly Father, we lift up your child to you that you may please take control, guide them, lord, and show them the way. And gracious God in heaven, we thank you, lord, so much, lord, for their life. Continue to be with them now and always. And, father, thank you once again for this podcast, lord, and thank you, Father, lord, for all those we've reached, and we just pray, father, lord in heaven, that your hands may please continue to be upon it. Lord, please continue to guide me, me and myself, and, heavenly Father, continues to fill us with the wisdom that you need for us to share with your children. In your blessed son's name, jesus Christ, as we pray, amen.
Speaker 1:Amen, amen, and I really hope that we were able to help you. Rome wasn't built in a day. The world wasn't created in a day in a day yep and be kind to yourself, have time, have patience, heal and just love on yourself and just has this time to be dedicated to the Lord and talk to him and pray, and I know sometimes it's difficult because you don't have somebody talking back but, when you are in, when you're hurt and you just get on your knees and you cry and you just talk with like nobody there.
Speaker 1:Like sometimes all of that relief is just whoo like whoo it just goes away.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I just want to quickly add as well please try journaling, if that helps. If you can't speak, just take pen to paper. It's helped me so many times. You could end up writing four pages and not realize it really helps. You just have a moment there with a journal and just zone out and just write everything down.
Speaker 1:That also can be really helpful yeah so yeah well, thank you, guys, um love and peace to all of you, all around the world, and we'll see you soon we'll see you soon.
Speaker 2:Bye.