Episode 4: One Bold Thing

Rewiring Boldness: Expanding Your Space & Taking Action

Join host Liza Tullidge on this episode of Humaning as we explore what it means to take bold action, expand your space, and stop waiting for permission to live the life you want.

We all have an invisible line—a boundary between what we believe is possible for us and what feels out of reach. Whether it’s asking for an opportunity, pursuing a goal, or even just seeing ourselves as someone who belongs in certain spaces, we often wait. We wait to feel ready. We wait for certainty. We wait for permission.

But what if boldness isn’t about being fearless?
What if it’s just a muscle—one that you can build through small, repeatable actions?

In this episode, we break down:

• The One Bold Thing Rule—a simple but powerful way to build courage through small, consistent steps.
• The neuroscience of boldness—how repetition rewires your brain to normalize what once felt intimidating.
• Why your brain resists stepping outside your comfort zone—and why that discomfort is actually a good sign.
• The dopamine shift—how to wire excitement to the action itself, rather than the outcome.
• How to stop waiting and start expanding your space—one bold move at a time.

Taking action—any action—before you feel ready isn’t about the result. It’s about becoming the kind of person who does the thing. Because the people who make the biggest leaps aren’t necessarily the smartest or the best-connected—they’re just the ones who don’t wait.

If you’ve been hesitating, overthinking, or waiting for a sign, this episode is for you. Your sign is here.

Tune in for a motivating, practical, and neuroscience-backed conversation that will help you stop playing small, rewire your brain for possibility, and start taking bold, meaningful steps—one action at a time.

If you enjoyed this episode, please rate and follow the podcast on your favorite platform, and subscribe to the Humaning newsletter at lizatullidge.com for exclusive content and resources. Check out the show notes for more information and join us next month as we explore another essential piece of the human experience.

To get every episode along with our monthly newsletter, which continues exploring the topic covered in that month's episode plus book recommendations, links to further resources, and helpful exercises, straight to your inbox - sign up here or at lizatullidge.com

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Human-ing is a Maven + Co production.

Transcript

SPEAKER_00: 0:04

Well, hello there. Welcome to Humaning. I'm your host, Liza Tullich. Thanks for taking a snippet out of your day to come and join us as we explore how to be human. Let's get to it. Today, we're talking about rewiring those mental boundaries that tell us what's, quote unquote, for us and what feels off limits. And we're addressing those through bold action. I'll share one of my favorite personal practices with you. A simple yet powerful way to expand your sense of what's possible, shift your brain's wiring, and start making the life you want to feel normal. You know that feeling when you really want something, but there's this quiet voice in your head that whispers, that's not for you. You're not allowed to have that. That's for others. Maybe it's that job you would love to go for, but you tell yourself you're not experienced enough yet. Maybe it's reaching out to someone you admire or whose support would demonstrably impact your work or career, but you convince yourself they never reply. Maybe it's moving to a new city, learning a new skill, or speaking up in a way that feels bigger than you're used to. Maybe it's just about taking up more space. Yet instead of action, you wait. You know you want this, but you wait. You wait until you feel more ready. You wait until the outcome seems more guaranteed. You wait until you get some kind of permission that now must be the right time. But where exactly is that permission supposed to come from? Somewhere along the way we all absorb these invisible lines, rules about what we're quote unquote allowed to do and what's for us and what's out of reach. And the problem is we assume these lines are real, but what if they're not? What if the only way to expand our reality, expand our space, expand what is quote unquote for us, is to step into the life you actually want and to do something before you feel ready. Not in a reckless leap off a cliff kind of way, but in small, intentional, bold ways. That's what we're talking about today. The power of one bold thing. How tiny acts of courage repeated over time rewire your brain, shift your sense of what's possible, and fundamentally can change your life. So if you're ready to start stepping beyond that invisible line, let's dive in. Not too long ago, I started playing around with this simple idea. Once a week, I'm gonna do one bold thing. That's it. Not five things, not a complete reinvention, or worrying that in one week I have to fix everything in my life or create everything that I was meant to do. Just one thing that stretches my comfort zone, my sense of normal, and doing one thing that I didn't think was possible or allowed for me. And here's the key. That one thing has to be something that makes you feel. Maybe it's something that you've been avoiding and makes you feel uncomfortable. Maybe it's something that excites you, but also scares you a little. Maybe it's something that deep down you wish you could do or have in your life or be, but you've been telling yourself, for whatever reason, it's not for you. It's not allowed for you. It's not in your realm. The goal of this activity isn't to be fearless. It's not about grandiose feats or being heroic or achieving something instantly. It's about stacking. It's about building the habit of stepping into the unknown and stacking these little bold moments into a big, bold future. Because you know that first time you do something bold, it feels massive. The second time, a little less massive. But by the fifth time, it's just something you do. That's how we change. Not by waiting to be ready or told that it's the perfect moment or guaranteed an outcome, but by acting first, figuring it out as we go, and letting our sense of reality blow wide open. I've been doing this now for a few weeks with a group of amazing friends and fellow entrepreneurs, and it's been wonderful seeing this practice develop amongst us. It's not, we're not each just picking something at random. It creates a hunger and an excitement. And it's about this idea of taking something that felt impossible or wishful thinking and bringing it into reality. Of saying, you know, for example, I have for so long respected the work of Paul Pullman, the former Unilever CEO. And I have thought to myself for about two and a half years that I just am going to reach out to him. I'm going to find a way to reach out to him. I'm going to reach out to him. And but then I always talk myself out of it, even though I know one conversation with him would probably rock the way I work. And lo and behold, Paul Pullman speaking at an event that I was invited to not too long ago. And I decided actually, I was messaged one of these other entrepreneurs and said, I'm going to ask Paul Pullman if he would grab a coffee with me and be an advisor. And you know what? Just giving myself that chance to say, screw it, I'm doing it, was so impactful because it doesn't even matter about the outcome. It was that taking that thing that had been seen as impossible or hype purely hypothetical or a wish and giving myself the chance to act like it was normal, and to giving myself the chance to just take an action on it, no matter what the outcome was, and say, hey, I'm allowed to do this too. So let's look a little bit at why this boldness sometimes feels hard and why that's actually a good sign. Here's something fascinating about our brains. The second you try to do something unfamiliar, something where the outcome is uncertain or the rules of engagement are uncertain, your amygdala, that part of the brain we've spoken about in previous episodes that's responsible for fear and survival, immediately sounds that alarm. It doesn't matter if what you're doing is objectively safe. If it's unfamiliar, part of your brain will flag it as a potential threat. This is why sending that big email can feel dangerous, or asking for a conversation with someone feels high risk, or speaking up in a room where you usually don't speak feels exposed, or why taking up space when you're used to being the polite one feels scary. Your brain is literally protecting you from rejection, failure, or discomfort. But here's the amazing part. When you repeat an action, even an uncomfortable one, your brain adjusts its sense of reality and its sense of fear and danger. It begins to process different information. Something that was scary before, now you have this touch that you had never done, now you have this touch point. I did this thing and I was okay. It diffuses that fear. It takes away something that objectively felt unknown, scary, impossible, distant, and all of a sudden gives your brains context to make it real. It's tangible, it's actionable, and guess what? I survived. So the more you do these bold things, the less of a threat these unknown actions become. That first cold email you send, terrifying. The fifth, no big deal. The first time you tell that person who you've been really dying to put up boundaries with, no, it feels icky. You might feel guilty, you might feel weird. But by the 10th, 12th, 15th time, it just becomes a normal habit. Something to keep in mind here as you do it is something I call the Molotov cocktail. Whenever I'm picking up a new habit, especially one that comes with a little sense of discomfort or awkwardness or is completely new for me, I think about it as that first time I'm throwing a Molotov cocktail. I it's probably not going to go well. It's probably gonna be uncomfortable. I'm probably gonna feel like I need to go run and hide from for cover. It might blow up in my face, but you know what? It clears the way. It clears out all of those barriers and obstacles that kept you from believing that this bold thing was for you, that this space was for you. It's cleared that all out. It might have been uncomfortable and chaotic, but you know what? You've got a smoother path this time. And the second time, you get to learn a little bit more. And the third time, a little bit more. So just accept that first time might be a Molotov cocktail. You're not getting it perfect that first time. And that's okay, because all you're doing is you're clearing space. You're not just building a habit and doing this, you're expanding your sense of what is normal and allowed for you. So that something that used to feel bold and impossible now feels obvious. So, a key point of this, something that is huge, is that outcomes don't matter. Most of us hesitate to take bold action because we're tied to the outcome. We think, what if they don't respond? What if I fail? What if nothing changes? What if I try this big thing and I get really excited and it doesn't come true? And so we hesitate. Because if we don't know that it's definitely going to work, why even try? Why take on that excitement, that potential, that fear, that potential failure if we can't guarantee it's gonna work when we feel safe and familiar where we are. But here's the shift that makes this so important. Boldness isn't about what happens next. It's about the fact that you did it at all. Let me give you an example. Say you reach out to five people in your industry that you genuinely admire, asking to grab a coffee or have a quick conversation, seeking maybe some mentorship, insight on your work or your product, or just seeking to grow your network. Maybe person one doesn't reply. Person two says no. Person three doesn't reply either. Person four says, I can't, but you should talk to this other person. Person five says yes. But here's the thing: even if none of them had said yes, you would have still changed. Because by sending those messages, you taught yourself that you are someone who goes for it. You taught yourself that you are someone who takes action. You taught yourself that you are worth reaching out to a stranger, and you are worth someone's consideration, and you are worth taking a shot. I think part of it is that we don't know how to vote for ourselves in confidence, how to have our backs. So we struggle then because we it's easier to tell ourselves it's not allowed for us than it is to try and figure out that awkward, uncomfortable, Molotov cocktail feeling, figuring it out how we would show up in a new space. So this is critical because now by doing it, you're someone who takes action. You're someone who expands their space. You're someone who tells yourself that whatever I set my sight on is possible for me because I will take action on it and I will figure it out instead of waiting for it to expand on its own or magically arrive in your lap or for the world to give you that hugely sought-after permission that probably is never coming. Because the real win is not in whether something works out, the real win is in becoming the kind of person who can step forward, who can back themselves, who can give themselves permission to go where they want and need to go, no matter the outcome. Let's talk quickly about why boldness gets easier over time and why stacking this habit becomes so potent. That's because our brain is wired for rewards, specifically dopamine. It's the chemical that drives motivation and pleasure. You know that feeling you get when you rapidly scroll through Instagram, doom scrolling? Those are really quick dopamine hits. It's what gives you that little up. And most of us have been trained to tie dopamine to external validation. We feel rewarded when someone says yes. When we get a pat on the back, when we achieve something measurable, when someone likes our Instagram post, when someone compliments us, those little things of validation give us a sense of dopamine hit. But realistically, that validation is just another way of waiting for permission. We're not saying, hey, I'm excited by this, I'm curious about this, I'm just really excited that I did this. We're saying, okay, I've done this thing, did I do a good thing? Did I not do a good thing? Have I done this right? And it doesn't become okay until someone tells us, yes, okay, good job. So here's the shift. Instead of tying dopamine to the outcome, let's tie it to the action. So it's not, okay, I'm gonna send this big email that I've been avoiding. And you know what? It's I'm only gonna be proud of myself if they reply. Mm-mm. It's I sent the email. Heck yeah, me. It's not okay, oh gosh, I'm applying for this big job. Ooh, ooh, this would be amazing. Did I get the job? No. Okay, it's not worth my time. No, no, no. It's heck yeah. I should up for an opportunity that I care about. I put myself out there. This is awesome. Because when you learn to celebrate the action itself, you become unstoppable because suddenly you're not waiting. You're choosing. If you want a good book to kind of explore this mindset a bit more, I highly recommend Dr. Carol Dweck's book mindset that explores the difference between growth and fixed mindsets. Embodying this practice is a great, great, great support of a growth mindset. Okay, so how to start today? Let's make this a bit real. Right now, as you're listening, ask yourself, what's something I've been avoiding? What's something I want, but keep telling myself it isn't for me? What is one action that could expand my space or change the sense of what's allowed? Here's a different way, a less theoretical question. What's that thing that you've talked to several friends about again and again that you would love to have, that you would love to do, that you wish that you could try? That's the thing. Or what's that thing that you've looked at someone else and it's almost struck up envy or jealousy or frustration because it seemed so impossible for you, yet they've made it real. Explore those things. And then from that, pick one bold thing to do this week. And do it. Not tomorrow, not next week, but now. Today. Put it in your diary, put it in your calendar, ask a friend or two friends, tell them to hold you accountable to it. Do it, do the thing, and then celebrate the fact that you have done it. Not waiting for the outcome. As soon as you do it, have a little dance. Get a little giddy. You've just done something that you have never allowed yourself to do before. You have just backed yourself. You have just given yourself a bold chance and created a whole new space in your concept of you. That is priceless. The people who make the biggest leaps in life aren't the ones who wait until they feel ready, or wait until the world tells them they're allowed to now, or wait until the outcome is guaranteed. They are the ones who take action. They are the ones who give themselves the chance to chase something exciting, or that feels scary, or that they would love to have in their life. They give themselves the chance to try it, to see if they can actually make something happen on it. And then they get to reap the rewards of figuring out life as it unfolds along the way. So let's get out and let's stack those bold habits. Let's commit to 52 bold habits this year. One bold thing after another bold thing after another bold thing. And let's see by this time next year what life looks like and what you think of as bold looks like. I'm excited for you. I'm excited for me. I'm gonna do this as well. I'm gonna tell you this one, the one for my week this week. I have been avoiding sending an email that is utterly ridiculous to an advisor of mine who has been an amazing backer for me. And for some reason, I just I miss the email and then I get avoided, and I get whatever it is in my head, and I just keep putting it off. And you know what? This week it seems little and it doesn't seem that bold, but apparently it's something bold I need to do. So that's gonna be my bold thing this week. So hold me accountable to it. Check in with me. I would love to hear about yours. Let's each go out and do those bold things. Let's go out and do those bold things once, twice, three times, four times, five times. And the thing that we've each have chosen, they won't feel bold anymore. We'll be expanding our spaces week over week and stacking this whole new reality. So here's my challenge to you. Before this episode ends, you've got about 10 seconds left. Commit to one bold action this week. Say it out loud, tell a friend, write it down. And when you do it, let me know how it went. I'd love to hear what boldness looks like in your life. Because remember, you don't wait for life, you build it. So let's go get bold. Don't forget to subscribe to the Humaning Newsletter at Lizatellege.com for updates, exclusive content, and additional resources. As always, all links, notes, and resources for today's episode can be found on the show notes and on my blog. Thank you so much for listening. Keep being curious, stay kind to yourself, and take charge of your past.