Episode 5 Season 3: Restless Legs Stopping Restful Nights in Perimenopause?

The creeping, buzzing urge to move your legs just as you’re trying to sleep isn’t random—and you’re not imagining it. We dive into why restless legs flare during perimenopause, how fluctuating estrogen disrupts dopamine signalling, and why falling progesterone leaves muscles tense and jumpy. From the first “why won’t my legs settle?” to the morning-after fog, we connect the dots between hormones, stress, stimulants, and sleep quality.

We also get practical. You’ll learn how iron status and ferritin influence restless legs, why vitamin D matters for neuromuscular calm, and which common meds—like antihistamines hidden in “night-time” pills—can make things worse. We unpack the caffeine–wine loop that keeps nerves revved and sleep fragmented, with a special look at histamine sensitivity that often spikes in midlife. Then we share a step-by-step plan: the right magnesium trio (glycinate for sleep, taurate for a calmer mind, malate for muscle ease), how to use topical magnesium for targeted relief, and the small evening rituals that create a true wind-down.

Expect simple, doable changes: a warm (not hot) bath, gentle floor stretches or slow yoga, low light and soothing scents, reading instead of scrolling, and smarter coffee timing. We round it out with guidance on lab tests to request, what “optimal” looks like, and how to talk to your GP about medication alternatives if needed. If you’ve been stuck in the cope-and-crash cycle—more coffee to survive the day, a glass of wine to soften the night—this conversation offers a kinder path to steady energy and quiet legs.

If this helped you, follow and share with someone who needs better sleep tonight. Subscribe for more clear, compassionate guidance on perimenopause, and leave a review so we can reach more women navigating the same road.

Chapters

• 0:06 New Season, New Setup
• 2:48 Listener Helen’s Night-Time Leg Struggles
• 4:16 What Restless Leg Syndrome Feels Like
• 6:36 Hormones, Dopamine And Muscle Tension
• 9:20 Iron, Vitamin D And Medication Triggers
• 12:13 Caffeine, Wine And Histamine Pitfalls
• 15:07 Magnesium Types That Actually Help
• 18:07 Sleep Hygiene, Stretching And Routine
• 21:10 Action Plan And What To Try First
• 22:50 World Menopause Month And Closing

Transcript

SPEAKER_01: 0:05

Welcome to the Uncomplicated Peramenopause Podcast. I'm Kate Grosf, your friendly peramenopause expert and life coach.

SPEAKER_00: 0:15

And I'm Gabriella, Kate's daughter, representing all the women who are nowhere near paramenopause but want to understand it better.

SPEAKER_01: 0:22

Whether you're just starting your perimenopause journey, deep into it, or you're a loved one trying to support someone who is. We've got you covered.

SPEAKER_00: 0:32

We'll be answering all of your burning questions, exploring the ups and downs, and sharing expert advice and personal insights.

SPEAKER_01: 0:38

So grab a cup of tea, get comfy, and let's dive into the wonderful, sometimes wild, world of perimenopause together.

SPEAKER_00: 0:47

And remember, no matter where you are on your journey, you are not alone.

SPEAKER_01: 0:51

Welcome to the uncomplicated perimenopause. Hello, my darlings, and welcome to episode 5, season 3 of the Uncomplicated Perimenopause Podcast. I'm Kate Grosvenor, a Perimenopause expert and life coach. And I'm Gabriella Grosvenor, Kate's daughter. Here's alone with you all. Right, we've made a decision. Whatever happens in this podcast we're carrying on, what do we mean by that? We you may have noticed, if you're watching on video, you won't have noticed, if you're listening in, that we are in a completely different place than we normally am because normally are, normally am, oh dear lord. Because we have created a new um kind of set or whatever for this for the podcast studio, and we have had a few technical issues.

SPEAKER_00: 1:36

But if you're watching a video of all of my musical achievements behind me. And you have changed your name to Rowan. None of these are mine. Everyone else's, not mine.

SPEAKER_01: 1:45

All these are mine, just to let you know.

SPEAKER_00: 1:48

If you're not watching a video, this sounds strange, but the certificates behind us, all music filling the room. Yes, not one mine. Bless you. But you have many other beautiful talents. I just wanted to clarify, it's not that they don't want to put them up. No. I don't have any.

SPEAKER_01: 2:04

Bless your heart. Now we're we're in a room that we use, I use it for my coaching one-to-one clients. And it's also, for some reason, became the let's put all the music certificates on the wall. It starts off as let's put all my coaching and masters and I just noticed your masters. I've never seen that certificate. Okay. So my master's, my bachelor's, my coaching certificates, all that stuff came on. And then it became the where we put all the Rowan's musical certificates as well. So and then I thought, well, Rhone's music certificates are going up. I'm going to put my music certificates up as well. And then Jenna's like, watch me get some certificates. And it just got a bit silly. So anyway, we digress. We digress. We don't need to be talking about all that stuff, do we, darling? So tell me, question for today. What are we talking about? Longish one. Oh, okay. Buckle in. Right, here we go. Helen. Hi, Helen.

SPEAKER_00: 2:57

She's 40. Bless. Okay. She's from London. Yeah? I said that really well. Usually go London, London. She's from London. Hello, let's see. I can't come back from London and say London. London. No. So when I try and sleep at night, my legs are really twitchy and so sore. Okay. It's every day. When I'm trying, actually trying to get to sleep. Right. There's so much pressure on them and they're almost itchy for some reason. Yeah, no, I know why. And I only struggle with this once I'm trying to fall asleep. Yeah. I have a very stressful job as it is. And when I come home, I try and relax, thinking that it would help with a couple of glasses of wine. Right. And makes it makes it worse.

SPEAKER_01: 3:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 3:40

And now because she's obviously has a really good job, she's surviving on coffee, which stay awake. Which makes it worse. And it's making it worse, and she doesn't know why. But she needs it. And then she just ended it with it's a never-ending F cycle. So okay.

SPEAKER_01: 3:59

What is it? What is it and why? And what consideration Helen. Okay. Helen, darling, don't worry. I know exactly what it is. I know how we can help you. And don't worry. Dr. Grosvenor in the house. I'm not a doctor. Don't tell them that because then I'll be held accountable. It's restless leg syndrome. And it's very, very, very common in paramenopause. And that's the good news. The bad well, not the good news, but the good news is I know what it is. The bad news is it's very common in peramenopause. And the worst news is you're doing exactly the wrong things. The good news is I know how to help you. So it's kind of good news, bad news, bad news, good news. Okay. So what is restless leg syndrome? Well, it's kind of like it's not just an itch or a cramp, it's more like a kind of a creeping, crawly synth synth kind of sensation. It's it's almost like a pulling feeling deep inside your legs, right? So it's sometimes in the calves, it can be in the thighs, it's typically in the calves, sometimes or even in the feet, and it's a pressure that builds up. Okay. Um sometimes it can even feel like a buzzing or an electric sensation in underneath the skin. And you have described a few ones, sore, itchy. Yeah, and it's like it's almost like you've got this irresistible urge to move or twitch your legs. It's really unpleasant. Okay, because but when you move your legs around, you get a temporary relief. So it's almost like you want to move or twitch your legs because at least then there's a temporary relief. But obviously, if you're then moving your legs or like banging your legs around to relieve the feeling, you're then keeping yourself awake, which is what's what's happening to her fundamentally.

SPEAKER_00: 5:41

And if she has a partner as well, it's a bit awkward like moving your legs around in the world.

SPEAKER_01: 5:45

Yeah, and then and then they'll talking to you and telling you to stop it and then just keeping you awake. So some women will say it feels like their legs won't settle, or as though something's crawling around inside of them, which obviously is not a very nice thing. Okay, it usually happens at night time or when you're lying in bed. So that's very typical of what she's describing as well. And of course, what she's describing as well, that next day they lack focus, they're extra tired.

SPEAKER_00: 6:12

So Yeah, there's a lot to decide, yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 6:15

Yeah, so that so what she's describing is very, very, very typical because you end up with uh you know no energy and everything else. So what can we do about it? That's the basic point. So, yes, everything you're describing sounds very atypical of Restos Leg syndrome. What causes it? Right, well, the first thing that causes it is fluctuating estrogen. Because when you have estrogen that that's fluctuating all over the place, what's essentially happening is that it affects the estrogen it affects your dopamine pathways. So excuse me, I've got a fog on my throat. Um, dopamine plays a a key role in in muscle movement. So when estrogen fluctuates wildly as it does in perimenopause, it can disrupt those signals and it leads to an irresistible urge to to like move your legs around. Also, progesterone. Now, excuse me, as we know, estrogen fluctuates and it and as it leaves the body, I say this probably most episodes, estrogen fluctuates like a roller coaster, it leaves your body. Progesterone goes down in a straight line, but as progesterone decreases, progesterone is your muscle relaxant. So your muscles aren't as relaxed as they used to be, which is obviously therefore a problem. So your muscles aren't as relaxed, and so then they can feel tense, they can feel twitchy, um, which isn't not much use. Also, I she didn't mention, but it's worth going to your GP and checking um if you've got low um ferritin levels or low iron levels. Sometimes that can lead to um low ferritin is your body's iron storage if you don't know what ferritin is. Um it can trigger or it can worsen restless leg syndrome. So if you've got low iron levels, estrogen also influences how your body uses the iron. If you have got low iron levels, it's worth checking with your GP or having your iron tested. And then if you have got low in iron levels, if you bring it up to normal, sometimes that's just enough to do it. One of the major reasons, major, major, major reasons for rest is leg syndrome is a magnesium deficiency. So taking a magnesium, so magnesium helps muscles relax and it also helps nerve functions, okay? So as stress rises, sleep quality decreases and magnesium can become depleted, especially if you drink alcohol and caffeine. Both, yeah. Right? So, and this is no judgment. We've all been there, zero judgment. So a magnesium complex is your best idea. Now, this isn't a shameless plug, but it's a little bit of a plug, just because a magnesium complex has three that you need, okay? So some magnesium complex, and I'm not bashing another brand, and I'm not gonna name brands, but some complexes will contain glycinate, maybe taurate and citrate, okay? Those are not the three you need. You need uh magnesium glycinate, taurate, and malate.

SPEAKER_00: 9:28

Yeah, I've seen others as well that only have two.

SPEAKER_01: 9:30

Yeah. Yeah. So the reason that you need malate, so gly magnesium glycinate will help you to sleep and and and be feel sleepy and relaxed. Magnesium taurate will help an anxious brain and help your brain to be calmer. Magnesium malate is the one that will help your muscles relax. Okay, so magnesium malate is specifically good for this, but the mixed with the glycinate will help you to feel sleepier. And because she describes having, sorry, what was her name? Helen. Helen. Because Helen describes having as quite a stressful job, yeah, having the magnesium taurate in there will help with that. So magnesium complex, and I'll put the link, because we obviously sell a magnesium um complex in the lifestyle brand, yeah, that's will be perfect for her.

SPEAKER_00: 10:21

And it's so not shameless. Plug you out the you've created the all of these specifically for them.

SPEAKER_01: 10:27

Yeah. So you know, I mean, that's why that's why we have those three for women in perimenopause, because restless leg syndrome is very, very common. Muscle twitching in general at nighttime is very, very common. Taurate is is women very often have an anxious brain in perimenopause because our dopamine and our serotonin is played with. So that's very common, and sleep issues are very common as well. So magnesium deficiency, hugely common for women in peramenopause, leading factor in restless leg syndrome. Okay, another common factor is sleep disruption. So as our sleep is disrupted, um, night sweats, python cortisol, all those kind of things that we know are really, really common in perimenopause, um, they all play a factor. Cortisol, which is stress hormones, she mentions a stressful job, she's not sleeping properly, these can all overstimulate the nervous system. Okay. What that does is it keeps your muscles on alert in verticomas. So restless leg syndrome often worsens at night because your cortisol levels should drop. And if if they're not dropping, if your cortisol levels aren't dropping, that will kick the um obviously restless leg syndrome gets worse. Dopamine dysregulation as well. So perimenopause can throw your brain chemistry off balance. So low dopamine or disrupted dopamine, you know, signaling is a very recognised form of cause of restless leg syndrome as well. So sometimes if you went to the doctor and you said, um, I've got restless leg syndromes, they would give you something to boost dopamine. Is it my favorite treatment? If I'm gonna be honest, I would start with the other things first. Because I'm a bit I'm a bit kind of of the of the belief that let's start with supplements, let's start with lifestyle. But if you tried everything else, if you'd boosted your uh iron levels, if you've boosted your magnesium, if you've got you know, if you've tried sleep hygiene to try and switch off screens at night time, for example, and and you still haven't had any improvement, then that would be an option. Also, there are certain medications she hasn't mentioned here, but there's certain medications that can interfere with it.

SPEAKER_00: 12:49

So right, interfere. I thought you're gonna say opposite.

SPEAKER_01: 12:52

No, so there's certain things that we know would make restless leg syndrome worse. For example, if you're taking antihistamines, okay, you're more likely to get restless leg syndrome. So I've no idea if Helen is or not, but if she's like an allergy, yeah, you're more likely to get twitchy legs. Right. Also, if you if you're taking antidepressants, so SSRIs, SNRIs, so very common. So if you've got a stressful job, quite often, I'm not saying Helen has, I don't know what medication she's taking, but um quite often those kind of medications would have that kind of effect, okay? Also, if you've got low vitamin D levels, which is common in this country. Which is common in this country, it's common with impyminabores, that can help. Now, she's not gonna like what I'm about to say on the next one. Caffeine definitely makes it worse because it it interferes with your it overstimulates you and works on your nervous system. So we know for a fact caffeine makes restless leg syndrome worse. Even if you take caffeine in the morning, yeah, it still affects you. Yeah, that's it. It it just it it because it works on your adrenaline and it just it stimulates, it's like that. Do you know when we talk about sugar and we talk about that crash, you know, you stimulate and then you crash? Yeah. That's the thing, it kind of heightens your kind of nervous system and then it crashes your nervous system. It's that kind of thing as well. Are you with me?

SPEAKER_00: 14:29

And also Isn't there not like a win like with sugar? If you from what I know, you have sugar, you get that boost, and then sudden crash, but it's all within the same couple of hours or something.

SPEAKER_01: 14:41

Yeah, but the thing is you then need caffeine to get back up to your normal level. It's the same kind of thing.

SPEAKER_02: 14:46

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 14:46

You know, you're you're if you drink too much coffee, you'll then become so exhausted. So you feel like you need more coffee to compensate.

SPEAKER_00: 14:54

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 14:54

So coffee becomes an addiction, like every all other stimulants, everything that you take that's a stimulant, you just you end up wanting more and more of it. Um, you know, one cup of coffee in the morning, yeah, is is you're gonna be okay. Yeah. But I as I always say, I wouldn't drink it for the first hour and a half because your natural cortisol levels will help you. The other thing that we know makes it really bad is wine. Yeah, I was just gonna ask. Yeah, but wine is um particularly um an issue. Um histamine levels we know are not great. Antihistamines, by the way, are contained in a lot of sleep aids. So some sleeping tablets or some things that will help you sleep often contain antihistamines. So, yeah, you think you're doing yourself good, but it might actually help problems with that. Um so yeah, wine, caffeine, if you've got low vitamin D, if you've got low iron, what does alcohol do to it? Same? Um alcohol is very complicated, but wine in particular can be in in perimenopause in general, we know that you become hi what we call histamine intolerant. And anything that contains histamines or or works with your histamine levels is a big problem. And wine in particular, and weird things like strawberries. Okay. Don't figure. You know, there's so not where I thought it was crazy. Yeah, I know, right? Um, so that the there's weird things that you have to just be aware of. Histamine levels can can really have issues with you. Um other things like even circulation issues, if you've got if you're that kind of person, so you know Rowan's always got cold feet and cold hands, she's got more issues. So if you had like, I wouldn't say it's linked to growing pains, but if you were a kid that always had cold feet, cold hands, you're more likely, I would say, to have restless leg because circulatory issues in general, you know, can lead to things like restless legs. And finally, stress is a huge amplifier.

SPEAKER_00: 17:05

Everybody says she has a job that's stressful. I don't know if she's got a family life as well. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 17:09

So when you're tense, your body releases more adrenaline. So this is the thing, anything that plays on your nervous system, anything that plays on your adrenaline system and keeps your muscles in like a semi-contracted state. So anything that makes you nervous, tense, stimulated. So this is the thing with caffeine as well. Yeah. This is the thing with stress. Anything that stimulates you, makes you nervous, makes you agitated. It's another reason why um restless leg syndrome tends tends to flare up on nights when you're exhausted, but you can't switch off mentally. So all of these are massive factors. So, what could you do? Well, the first thing that you can do, keep your magnesium levels topped up. Okay, especially glycinate, malate, taurate, like I mentioned. Okay? Check your ion and ferritin levels with your GP or your doctor. Try and wind down properly before bed. That doesn't mean alcohol, that means a warm bath and not a hot bath. Hot baths can cause circulatory issues. Okay, so you want a warm bath and not hot bath. I assume it would help.

SPEAKER_00: 18:12

I don't know why. I would have assumed.

SPEAKER_01: 18:14

Warm bath and not hot baths. Because what warm baths will do is they will constrict the blood vessels or they dilate it too far. So you don't want a cold shower and you don't want a hot bath. You want warm because you don't want to constrict or dilate too far. Gentle stretching. So warm bath, gentle stretching. Magnesium creams are really good. Ready for you to say yoga. Yeah, yoga. I'm basically saying yoga. Gentle stretching, yoga, nighttime yoga. Yoga with Adrienne is really she does a lovely night bedtime yoga. It's basically gentle stretching on the floor with nice, floaty music. And her dog does it with her. Our magnesium cream as well is really, really good for restless legs.

SPEAKER_00: 18:56

Yeah. Oh, yeah, that's actually I didn't think of that. That's helping so many women that we know.

SPEAKER_01: 19:01

Yep. We have a magnesium spray and a magnesium cream. The magnesium spray has a higher concentration, but the magnesium but the magnesium cream is also nice because you spend time massaging it in. And it has things like lavender in as well, which is really lovely. So they're both really great. Just maintaining good sleep hygiene. So making sure you're winding down properly before bed, turning screens off, um, obviously no caffeine before after like midday, and making sure you're hydrated, you know, not watching TV, all that kind of stuff, and limit alcohol.

unknown: 19:35

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00: 19:36

That's really, really important. I think I'm not speaking obviously on behalf of Helen. I think she thinks the alcohol will help us. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 19:43

That's the thing, because we want to take the edge off the day. But if you actually had a warm bath and stretched and unplugged from the world, yeah, alcohol numbs, but it doesn't unwind you. Yeah, that's true. It numb the stress. Actually, doing mindfulness exercises like journaling, like um You have a beautiful bedtime routine.

SPEAKER_00: 20:07

I do. The bath, the skincare, the creams, smells. You associate the smells with okay, time to go to bed now. Yep. It's so healthy.

SPEAKER_01: 20:15

It is. And I have to because obviously being ADHD, my brain works a hundred miles an hour.

SPEAKER_00: 20:21

Yeah, you've always struggled.

SPEAKER_01: 20:22

I've always struggled with sleep and it it takes me up. So I have to read, not watch TV. I have a bath with Epsom salts and beautiful ovarium oils, so like lavender and all those kind of beautiful smells. I have to have the room I come back into, it has to be a certain um not too bright, you know, no big light as we call it in the UK. Warm light, not cold light. Certain smells has to be has to be a beautiful, kind of relaxing, calm smell. I don't like my room to be messy, so it should be tidy so nothing distracts me. Because if I start tidying up, then I get distracted, and then that's a nightmare. And these kind of things, my pajamas are always ready in, so I don't have to start hunting for them. Bamboo pajamas, obviously, goes without saying the bamboo pajamas have to be out. And my skincare routine is is very, very important to me. So it it obviously, so I look after my skin, but also that kind of massage and and just calming down, winding down, and journaling if you if you've got an active mind is also brilliant. Those kind of things, that's a proper sleep hygiene routine rather than just numbing. TV numbers your brain, it doesn't it doesn't wind down your brain. Alcohol numbs your brain, it doesn't wind. I used to eat chocolate to numb.

SPEAKER_00: 21:36

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01: 21:37

That was food was the way I we all have our numbing. That's what I used to do. I you know that back in 2016, that was but my at the end of the day, I just used to look forward to going to bed so I could eat chocolate to have almost like a sugar coma. So anywhere I could describe it, it was just sweets and chocolate. And that would be how I would numb out from the day, from the pain of what was going on in my head. Um, but it didn't do anything, it it would just literally numb out until the sugar wore off. So sleep hygiene is really, really important. So yeah, I hope that helps something, but yeah, start with magnesium, that's the easiest fix. Magnesium, as in the complex, and then magnesium either spray or cream, and then your sleep hygiene. And you'll be shocked how much better it gets just with magnesium. It's such a simple fix. Yeah. If that so magnesium, magnesium complex, magnesium spray, sleep hygiene, then it would be looking at your iron levels. I would say probably 90% of women that's gonna fix. Seriously. So fingers crossed, Helen. I hope that helps. All right, my darlings. Obviously, at the moment we're in October, so it's World Menopause Month. So join with us, make some noise. Let's share episodes, let's, I don't know, just make sure that you're sharing your paramenopause and menopause journeys online because we need to make sure we're paying it forward and that women are aware that we need to keep this conversation going. We've got a very special episode coming up next episode, so I hope you stay tuned. All right, my darlings, take care and we will speak to you soon. Bye. Thanks for joining us today on the Uncomplicated Perimenopause Podcast. We hope you found this episode helpful and inspiring.

SPEAKER_00: 23:39

Don't forget, if you have any questions or topics you'd like us to cover, you can reach out through our Peramenopause group or on WhatsApp.

SPEAKER_01: 23:46

For more information on my coaching, perimenopause supplements, books for upcoming events, please visit www.caterokener.com.

SPEAKER_00: 23:55

And if you've enjoyed today's episode, please subscribe, rate, and review our podcast. It really helps us reach more listeners just like you.

SPEAKER_01: 24:03

Until next time, remember perimenopause doesn't have to be complicated. We're here to help you every step of the way. Stay uncomplicated.