S3E3 - Learning When to Say No

Feeling like you're juggling chainsaws while riding a unicycle? You're not alone.

Ambition is the double-edged sword many of us in helping professions wield daily. We care deeply, we aim high, and we often stretch ourselves beyond reasonable limits trying to meet every expectation. The result? We feel like we're failing everywhere despite our best efforts.

This episode dives into the uncomfortable truth about trying to do it all. As social workers, parents, community members, and financial beings, we're told to excel in every arena simultaneously. Pay off debt, save for retirement, start side hustles, give back, spend quality time with family—the list never ends. But when everything becomes a priority, nothing truly is.

I share my personal journey of reflection and the difficult process of saying no to good things that weren't the right things for me right now. Through practical steps like taking inventory of everything on your plate, sorting by impact versus effort, and learning to say no with love, I outline a path toward meaningful simplification that creates breathing room in both your schedule and your mind.

The same principles apply beautifully to our financial lives. Rather than making minimal payments across multiple debts or chasing several side hustles simultaneously, focusing your energy on one priority creates momentum. And momentum builds hope—something we all need when facing overwhelming challenges.

Ready to protect your energy and reclaim your focus? Join me in this honest conversation about doing less to accomplish more of what truly matters. What's one thing you can say no to this week to make space for your priorities?

Transcript

Joey: 0:01

Hey everybody, welcome back to the Fire Social Worker Podcast. I am your host, Joey Laswell, and I'm glad you're here with me today. I really appreciate it. Last time we talked about having too many irons in the fire and, let's be real, I was talking about myself. I had projects on top of projects, side hustles, ideas, non-profit podcast. I mean, yeah, you name it. I was probably trying to do it and it felt like juggling chainsaws while riding a unicycle. Would not recommend.

Joey: 0:39

Today I want to build on that conversation and kind of talk about how to actually simplify when life feels overwhelming, because if you're anything like me, you care deeply, you've got, you know, ambition, but sometimes it's just too much. So let's start with a quick update. Since the last episode, I've been doing a lot of reflecting on what I want to focus on, what really matters to me my family, my mission and honestly, it's been uncomfortable. I've said yes to way too many things in the past, mainly because I just wanted to help, partly because I just don't want to disappoint people. But when you stretch yourself too thin, you end up not showing up the way you want to, and I've felt that sting, you know, committing to something and then realizing I can't give it the energy it deserves. It kind of reminds me of something that I see in my clients all the time. We're told to do everything Pay off debt, save for retirement, start side hustles, give back, spend time with family and the truth is, when you try to do it all at once, a lot of times you end up feeling like you're failing everywhere. And that's kind of how I felt, and I know I'm not alone in that. So here's the thing Ambition is a double-edged sword. It pushes us to grow, but it can also bury us under the weight of our own expectations. For social workers especially, we're trying to carry too much ambition clients, paperwork, family stress, community needs and then you throw on the financial layer on top of that and it's no wonder why a lot of us feel just really exhausted.

Joey: 2:39

But here's what I've learned If everything is a priority, nothing is a priority. You can't sprint in every direction and expect to make progress At some point. You've got to pick a lane that matters most right now and just focus your energy there. It's the same with money. If you're paying $25 here and $40 there across six different debts, it feels like you're not moving the needle. Different debts it feels like you're not moving the needle. But if you attack one thing at a time, whether that's the smallest balance for a quick win or the highest interest for the math nerds out there, you just start to feel the momentum, and momentum builds hope. All right, so let's get practical.

Joey: 3:26

There are three things that I've been using to cut through the chaos, and maybe they'll help you too. Step one is to take inventory. Write everything down on your plate Work, family side, hustles, even the little nagging tasks. Sometimes just seeing it all in one place makes you realize oh, no wonder I am exhausted. Step two sort by impact versus effort. You know, I gotta ask yourself what actually moves the needle. What gives me the biggest return financially, emotionally for the least amount of effort? That's where your energy should go. So this one is tough for me.

Joey: 4:14

Step three is saying no with love. It's really tough for helpers like me and you that are listening, but every time you say yes to something that doesn't fit your mission, you're saying no to things that really matter. So practice saying no gently but firmly. You know. Protect your energy. It is your most valuable currency, and let me tie it back to the finances for a second instead of just chasing five different side hustles, maybe focus on the one that actually excites you and has the most potential. Instead of trying to max out every account, maybe focus on the one that actually excites you and has the most potential. Instead of trying to max out every account, maybe focus on paying down the one debt that's weighing on your chest.

Joey: 4:56

Simplifying creates breathing room, all right. So here's some encouragement for you. You don't have to do it all. So here's some encouragement for you. You don't have to do it all. You just have to do the next, the right next thing. For me, that means focusing on Made Up, memphis and this podcast. Those are the places I feel called to pour into right now. The rest I'll get to it later, or maybe I won't, and that's okay. So I want to leave you with a challenge. What's one thing you can say no to this week, one thing that you can set down so you have more room to say yes to what really matters. But anyways, thank you so much for tuning in. If this episode resonated with you, share it with a friend who might need a reminder to slow down and focus. And if you want to keep up with me, you can find me on LinkedIn Substack and wherever you listen to podcasts. So up until next time, keep igniting your financial future.