Exploring Our Energy, Awareness & Evolution

In this episode, Kim and Louise unpack the invisible habits, systems, and stories that keep us stuck on autopilot. From midlife identity shifts to menopause brain fog to the pressure of always needing to be “better,” this conversation dives deep into how we relate to energy, awareness, and the myth of who we used to be.

We explore how mindfulness can interrupt unconscious patterns, how language (including the body's) helps us make meaning, and why community is essential for navigating the messy, beautiful transitions of life. This one’s for anyone who’s feeling disconnected, disoriented, or just plain over it.

Whether you're sleepwalking through your days or just craving a new way of being... this is a reminder that you're always evolving.

“Your life gets to be your story; no one else can write it for you.” — Louise Neil

“The body speaks in a language most of us haven’t even tapped into.” — Kim Romain

Key themes:

• Why energy awareness matters more than energy output
• How menopause impacts identity and presence
• The difference between knowing the words and speaking your body’s language
• Creating your “dream team” of support before crisis hits
• The freedom that comes from claiming your evolution

Key moments:

00:00 – Welcomes and Introductions

02:24 – Autopilot, Energy Leaks, and Conservation

06:12 – The “Shoulds” Around Self-Care

09:47 – Aging, Identity, and Midlife Awareness

17:23 – Sleepwalking Through Life and Losing Awareness

20:31 – Disconnection as a Symptom of Menopause

23:50 – The Body’s Language and What It’s Telling Us

26:35 – Building Your Support System and Dream Team

30:26 – Preparing for Life’s Messy Middles

32:33 – Saying No to Help and Trusting Your Timing

36:37 – What Helps Us Navigate Uncertainty?

39:08 – Your Life Is Your Story; You Get to Write It

42:19 – Acceptance, Awareness, and Belief in Something Bigger

44:12 – If We’re Not Evolving, What Are We Doing?

Join a circle of changemakers committed to leading with purpose, presence and ease inside Kim's Rising Visionaries mentorship program.

Reclaim your career and confidence during midlife through Louise's Rise & Redefine program.

If you’re loving this show, come check out the Feminist Podcasters Collective, where creators like us are uplifting diverse voices and driving meaningful change. If you’re looking for new shows to fill your feed, head to https://feministpodcasterscollective.com to explore everything we have to offer.

Transcript

Episode 170: Exploring Our Energy, Awareness & Evolution

Release Date: July 29, 2025 Hosts: Kim Romain & Louise Neil

(00:30) Kim Romain: Hi there, welcome to the Empowered and Embodied show. I'm Kim Romain.

(00:36) Louise Neil: And I'm Louise Neil.

(00:38) Kim Romain: We're two transformational coaches who are also fellow travelers on the path of growth and self-discovery. And we're inviting you along for the ride. That's right. We're right here in the trenches with you navigating the ups and downs of life. And each week we'll be sharing our own experiences, bringing you conversations with amazing guests, and exploring insights and strategies that have helped us find more clarity, confidence and ease in our lives. And trust us, we do not have it all figured out. We're learning and growing right alongside you. So if you're ready to rise above the chaos, doubt and confusion that sometimes life throws our way and step into a more empowered and embodied version of yourself, then you're in the right place. Let's get started.

(01:37) Kim Romain: Hello, hello, hello everybody. Welcome back to another episode of the Empowered and Embodied show. I am one of your co-hosts, Kim Romain, joined as always by my lovely co-host.

(01:47) Louise Neil: That's me. I'm the other one. I'm Louise.

(01:50) Kim Romain: It's like thing one and thing two.

(01:51) Louise Neil: Yeah, do you think Thing 2 ever got tired of being number two?

(01:55) Kim Romain: Well, how could you tell if it was thing two or if thing two put on thing one's shirt from day to day?

(02:01) Louise Neil: Sure, maybe they switched.

(02:02) Kim Romain: They could.

(02:03) Louise Neil: Yeah. Or do we just like fall into that's our role?

(02:06) Kim Romain: Mm. Yeah. I mean, sometimes there's that, right? Yeah. It's kind of like, I know some mindfulness exercises. One of the things is, you know, switch up the hand that you brush your teeth with, right? It's like, am I always doing it this way or is there another way to do it? Do I always step forward with my right foot first or can I sometimes step forward with my left?

(02:29) Louise Neil: Right. Yeah, we do so much without thinking about it, right? Like the brain is tricky like that, because it does want to automate things. And yet, when we get automated, or too automated, I think we miss out on so much.

(02:49) Kim Romain: I agree. I think that we have, and not even talking about what we automate to support us, but the habits, the behaviors, the belief systems, all of this has become so habituated that it is all on autopilot. And yeah, it saves energy, sure.

(03:12) Louise Neil: Mm-hmm. Well, that's why our that's why we're our brain does it right this to save energy. Yeah.

(03:15) Kim Romain: Yeah. Conserve energy. But we're also not being chased by bears. At least most of us, not most days. And I was actually on a call with somebody who was on a walk when we were on the call and she's like, so there's actually bears in the area. So if I suddenly hang up, I'm like, okay. So maybe we do sometimes still get chased by bears. But I digress. So our, yes, our bodies, our brains are helping us conserve energy, but to what end? Like what are we? To what is the expense? What are we paying for that price? Did I say that right? Yeah, I think maybe, I don't know. What price are we paying?

(03:53) Louise Neil: Yeah, yeah. Well, so, so interesting. Because I know Kim, you and I we talk about like, I talked to my clients a lot about, you know, where are the energy leaks? Where's, where's the energy? When we're not paying attention, where is it just leaking out? And we can find ourselves short on energy. And want to reclaim some of it and yet we're wired to conserve it. Where's the rest of it go?

(04:29) Kim Romain: I ask myself that all the time. Where does it go?

(04:36) Louise Neil: It go? Yeah, and then we just bump through life when we're not paying attention. We just yeah, I've been up at the I've been up at the cottage for a few days. And being up here, I get to I get to I still get to work. I still get to play do all of those things. But the the pace is different. Like the energy that is here is different energy. And I show up differently in that energy. And I noticed this happens in my house too, is that I have different energy in my office. And when I go work, right in the living room or on the back deck, there's a different energy there. I feel like I'm coming at things a little bit differently. And and yet, I'm most comfortable in my office.

(05:29) Kim Romain: Yeah. Why is that?

(05:32) Louise Neil: Well, I think there's part of a story there that I have to look a certain way and be a certain way for when I'm working air quotes working right on my business or with clients. Nobody cares. Really? We're so used to right? Nobody cares what my backdrop is like here I am in the bunkhouse amongst golf clubs and extra mattresses today, but it's a great place. It's quiet. It's cool. And it's a great place to work here today. But, but there's a story that I tell myself around like, what, what should be and what I, yeah, how I show up. And yet, in that energy, it's not the most energetic place. Like I have a different energy in different places. So, so I don't know if that answers your question, but it's something that I've been noticing as like, how easy we get into kind of these routines and these habits. And yet, I think it it's sapping energy, we don't know it. We're trying to conserve it, but it saps it.

(05:54) Kim Romain: In truth, nobody does care. Yeah.

(06:55) Kim Romain: Yeah, what you just said made me think of a call that I had earlier today. And the person on the other end of the call was telling me about all the great things that are happening in their world, all of the great things that are happening in their organization, right? What they're really excited about, their big vision, they're up, they have this energy. And then I didn't even ask a question. It was so fascinating where they just switched and said, But you know, the problem is it's like, I'm not taking care of myself in the way that I know I should. Okay, well, first of all, ding ding, should. But there was that place where I could see the energy shift and with that individual, they were also saying, I used to love going to the gym. I used to love spending my mornings, you know, meditating and doing yoga and going to the gym and lifting heavy shit and throwing it down and doing all this stuff.

(07:31) Louise Neil: Shit.

(07:53) Kim Romain: And I'm bored with it, but I know that that will make me feel better. So maybe I just need to add that to my account. And again, I didn't ask a question. They were just spiraling through all this stuff. And what I realized, like from what you just said, is there's the expectation that because we did it a certain way at a certain time in our lives, that we're going to experience the same thing now. That that thing is always going to work for us. And that's bullshit.

(08:24) Louise Neil: Yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's true. You know, we are in this place of like, people who are who we surround ourselves with you and I like we're in a in a growth industry, right? It's is it's a growing learning, evolving. And yet, oftentimes, I hear it too is like, but I would just I want to grow and learn and evolve to what used to be. Because because I used to have energy. And so I should be should. I want to get back to that. The gym worked before the gyms never worked for me. I'm just pretending. Let's get back to that. And we look back, even though we're like trying to grow forward. We keep getting hooked on these things that used to work for us. Yeah. Yeah. There's a lot of that going on in my world right now. A lot of this what used to work doesn't work anymore. Especially when you're going through perimenopause and menopause, right? Like what used to work is not working. Like just in all kinds of ways. All kinds of ways.

(08:57) Kim Romain: Right.

(09:47) Kim Romain: Frightening ways at times. It's like, the fuck just happened?

(09:53) Louise Neil: Yeah, yeah, yeah, all kinds of parts don't work like they used to. And yet, trying to trying to like, when we're when we hang on to what used to be like, we can't see the the path forward. Like we can't see that like, what our bodies are doing now, what how we think how we process information, all of those things. Like there's there's such greatness about it. Like there's such like goodness about it. Like it's an evolution to go through the menopause transition. And yet we get so hung up on like, but I want to be back there. Like I want to, I want to have that kind of energy. I want to have that kind of, I hear freedom a lot. I want to have that kind of freedom. And yet that's, that's who we were. That's not who we are or who were. Be coming.

(10:48) Kim Romain: You know, I can't help but go to the place of like, that's the systems, that's the conditioning, right? We were better then, and we lost something about ourselves, particularly as we age and we bring that part of us, right? If we're talking about the aspects of self that are aging. There's also the, we always need to, and I know we've talked about this in the past, it's we always need to be growing up, right? Evolving up. And getting better and getting stronger and getting da-da-da-da. And if we are not growing in that direction, that upwards trajectory, what's wrong with us? Versus I am growing and evolving every day and every day brings with it new information. That doesn't mean that it's always sunny and shiny and quote unquote better information. It's just new.

(10:55) Louise Neil: Sure. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Yeah.

(11:39) Louise Neil: Right, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, it's, it's funny when we think of, well, when I think of evolution, it really does kind of hold that, that better word, right? Like, I'm evolving. So it's, it's better. It just is, right? It's like, it's, it's this thing that we go through. We get to define, we get to define what it is. Yeah, and it's systems and it's habits, right? So absolutely, we live in this patriarchal system that has a very negative view here in North America about aging, aging women especially. And so yes, we live and breathe that water. And I think it comes back a bit too, to what we started talking about was that it also has to do with like our habits and like what we as a being is used to doing. And we can't see another way. We only know what's been, right? And so we get attracted to that. We only know that it feels good to brush teeth with your dominant hand, right? Like it's just as a fact. We don't even question it. And so I think a lot of this is what we think is fact too, that that what has worked is a fact and so it must now work or work going forward. This is not true.

(13:18) Kim Romain: Doesn't that just leave us bumping along in our lives? Just like, not really. We were talking before we got started, like that feeling of there might be a lot of balls in the air, but I can't touch any of the ball. Like they're not tangible because they're just all up there because I'm just bumping along.

(13:34) Louise Neil: Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Are you bumping along?

(13:40) Kim Romain: I'm not in the mood, like that's why I get frustrated when it's like, I don't want to be bumping along. So what do I need to do to not be bumping? Because I'm really aware if it starts to feel like I'm in that space, right? In my design, when I'm really in my sacral energy and I'm really just doing the things, I'm out of alignment because I'm not utilizing the totality of who I am. There are times that call for that. That kind of energy, right? We were talking about energy that call for that kind of energy. Old patterns have my body believe that's what we need to do. Okay, great. That's the pattern we've got. We got back into that rhythm. We're going to be doing the things. And so now we do the things versus no, that's a time bound way of being now. That's not the default setting. So I don't, no, I would not say that I'm bumping along, but I do think that I know that a lot of people that I'm in connection with, a lot of my clients, at some point are just bumping along. It's like that they're skipping a stone, they're the stone and it's just going and it just keeps going without really touching the water.

(15:00) Louise Neil: Sure, what's, you're bumping along, what are you not doing, I guess is my question. Like, I don't know when I skip a stone, is it not okay to bump along?

(15:18) Kim Romain: I don't know. I mean, I think it may serve a purpose. I personally would not want to spend my life just bumping along.

(15:19) Louise Neil: I don't know. Like, yeah. I'm not saying like that you kind of just like just bump through life. And is there not this moment sometimes where we do have to like bump along that we do have to like be a stone that skips on the water in order to get deeper. That's what gets us deeper faster, right? Like as a stone goes, we don't get stuck in the shallows. We bump along the surface to get where we need to go.

(15:59) Kim Romain: No, I've never been a stone. I don't know how deep it goes.

(16:02) Louise Neil: I don't know, right? Like, I think there's, and I don't know if I'm getting high on my words today, but I think there's this, I think we try to, we try to fix, we try to fix, like, what's happening and who we are in the moment. Like, there's this constant need to fix. Something's broken, let's fix it, right? And, and I don't know that we always need to be fixing like we're not broken like I don't need to fix anything because I'm in menopause Like I'm not I'm not broken. I I don't know how my body's currently working or what my hormones are currently doing but I'm but I'm far from broken and And so I don't I don't think I need to be fixed. I would like to have a different sleep pattern that involves actual sleeping and and yet I don't feel like I'm broken and and but I am bumping along sometimes trying and and and experimenting like I think we can we can get what we need from from a few bumps along the way we don't need to we don't need to be fixing it all the time do we?

(17:23) Kim Romain: No, I think we're using different vernacular. Yeah. Because to me, bumping along is not experimenting. It's not even really having an awareness that, and I'm not going to say that there's anything wrong, but that you're not in alignment, that something is not, is not yours. Right? So if you're having trouble sleeping and you experiment with different things, that's yours. That's yours to experiment with, to choose, right? It's your body. You get to choose. If your partner is having a hard time sleeping and that's keeping you awake, now you do have a choice, but they also have a choice. That's not mine to fix for them. It's not mine to fix for me if I don't need to fix it. If I can be okay with, well, I'm getting a shitty night's sleep because my partner's getting a shitty night's sleep. But I think, the, to me, the bumping along means you're not even experimenting. You're just sleepwalking through life.

(18:17) Louise Neil: Mmm. Like there is an understanding, I guess, that we come to around what control we actually have in those situations. And we can feel very helpless a lot of times. And yet... Hmm, I don't know. Part of me wanted to say... Not that I want to be helpless in certain moments, but at the same time, sometimes we just have to like, let a lot of that go. Right? And just like, and just, and just be. Yeah, I don't want to sleepwalk through life and yet I don't need to be holding on to everything I come in contact with. Like that's the other extreme, I guess.

(18:52) Kim Romain: Yeah.

(19:13) Kim Romain: I think that that, right, that speaks to the complexity of who we are as human beings. There's gonna be times when we are bumping along, we're sleepwalking through life, we're checked out, we're disconnected, we're dissociated at the farthest extent, right, whatever it is. Sure, we're humans, we're gonna have that. And then we're gonna have those other moments if we're open to it where we're very mindful, we're very present, we're very grounded, we're very attuned to what's happening. And then there's going to be people that don't know either end of that spectrum and I don't know what that life is like. I genuinely don't like, I know when I've been sleepwalking through life. I know what I've been bumping along. I know when I've been really tuned in. I know when I've been overtuned in. But that's a that so that to me goes to awareness and how aware are we that we are even present in our own lives? So how many, right, menopause, you've gone deep into it, this beautiful thing of becoming a menopause doula, like beautiful work in here that is so needed. And there are so many women that I know that have gone through or are going through menopause that are like, wait, what? What? Is this really like half lashes I know about, but there's nothing else, right?

(20:31) Louise Neil: Yeah.

(20:37) Louise Neil: Yet not. Yes, and that lack of awareness doesn't prevent things from happening to us. We miss a lot of that ability to cease the day when we're not aware, right? You know, as you were talking about like awareness and being connected. Being disconnected is actually a symptom of menopause. And I had it and I didn't know what was happening to me, right? I did become a little bit disconnected in my last relationship. found myself, just like days were just like slipping away. And that was fine. I didn't have any desire to grab onto them. I barely knew that they were slipping away. And yet I still had to show up for work. had to show up for my client. Like I still had to show up. And yet super disconnected. And when we don't, when we can't name some of these things that are happening to us, when we're not even aware before they happen of what it could be or it could feel like, we do start to sleepwalk through our lives. Because we don't have the language to even be able to grab onto anything. And, and a lot of times we don't have the capacity or the energy to do so, right? Like your menopause transition is like stealing all kinds of energy from you that you aren't even aware of. Your body's going through this huge transition. Every system that we have is trying to figure out like how to operate without a fuel. Without estrogen that we used to have. And it's trying to rebalance, recalibrate. And so it's all of these things that are happening. And if we don't know this, then it can start to feel like now we're even more disconnected or now we're even more afloat. Now we're even more sleepwalking through this period of time. And it can be really disorienting. And I think too sometimes, if we can name it, then we can be okay in the moment. Right? If I had language around how I was feeling when I was disconnected, and I could or somebody close to me could have said, you know, that's, that's perimenopause, they that can happen. Right? Let's let's go talk to a professional about it. Like, let's make sure it's perimenopause and not depression or not something else. That would have been so different, because I would have had language and awareness around it. But you're right, like we can slip into this, not being aware, but it I think it's, I think it can happen to a lot of people who aren't paying attention.

(20:39) Kim Romain: But that's lack of awareness.

(23:50) Kim Romain: 100%. Yeah. I think that it was interesting that you said language because I think we do have language. It's the language, it's our primal language. It's the language of our body, the language that our body speaks to us that we may not have words for. So there's a difference between not having language and not having words. And I think we do have the language that most of us haven't even tapped into. Majority of my clients when I say, so what are you experiencing in your body? They're like, it made me just a little tightness in my chest. Like it's always tightness in my chest, tightness in my belly. That's it. That's the extent. they're, if they're starting this work to even connect with their bodies. But our bodies give us language all the time. It's learning how to translate that language into words. and then have a space where you can use those words. Because I think, right, you're talking about, if I had words to tell somebody what I was going through, who do you tell? So how do you translate what you're experiencing into words, and then who do you tell? And I think that's the... to me, it comes back to that place that awareness, paying attention type of awareness, right? Is when we're aware, when we pay attention. We have a deeper knowing, we have that language. And it's an opening for us to be able to learn how to translate if we've never translated it before, so that we can do something with it. And to me that, right, that's the antithesis of walking through life like a zombie. And also know, like for me, there were times I needed to, that was very protective for me. I needed to be walking through life like a zombie because the rest of it was too overwhelming. I had a certain level of awareness that I was doing it. And so it was not necessarily intentional. It wasn't not that good. But it was, I was aware that I was doing it. I didn't, to your point from earlier, I didn't feel a need that I needed to fix it. Right?

(24:19) Louise Neil: Sure.

(25:12) Louise Neil: Mm-hmm.

(26:07) Louise Neil: Sure.

(26:18) Kim Romain: Leaning into a place where it needed fixing or support in that way. And yet when we do want that, how do we know who to go talk to? How do we know how to begin this process of translating the awareness that is starting to come online?

(26:35) Louise Neil: Yes, because it's the act of trying to get it out that actually allows us to claim it, right? And, and I think it's, it's really important to think about. It's, like, I feel like it's like, you know, we do our, I'm gonna get maybe a little morbid, but like we, when we make wills, when we plan for, right, our end of life and what that can look like. This is almost like a, like, here's a transition plan, right? Here's a plan to put in place to say, okay, who are my people? Who are my champions? And let them know that that's who they are to you. So that when you notice or recognize what's going on, or maybe they notice or recognize what's going on, you can have a start having a conversation. And you're right, Kim, we might not always know, but we know we might not be able to describe it necessarily, but there's a deep knowing. And, and it's, and it's in part of that plan, I think, and this is the work that you do somatically, is like, how do we like, how do we how do we practice now? Right? Getting into our bodies, knowing what that feels like knowing what we want to be feeling, right? How do we how do we get there? How do get more aligned? When it feels misaligned and aligned, like we need to be testing these things. So that in in some of those moments, we are able to touch to touch something deeper and to be able to say, okay, I can't do this alone. I can't touch this thing alone. I need these, but we have to practice. have to build our community. We have to build our people and we have to practice what it's actually like to listen to our bodies so that we know when it needs help. We might not know what it needs, but we know when it needs it.

(27:42) Kim Romain: Mm-hmm.

(28:44) Kim Romain: It's, it's, I used to use the term. haven't used it in a while. I just realized when you were talking the dream team, who is my dream team? Right. And my dream team are those individuals, potentially even organizations that it's not just our wellbeing. People, although that is in my opinion, part of my dream team and highly suggest we all have a mental health and wellbeing dream team. But beyond that, like who are our friends, who are our family members, who are, like you said, our champions, those people that we know that if we need to go talk to them about, if we need to share something that feels so uncomfortable to talk about, who is that one person you can talk to? Is it right? How are you connected to them? Is this somebody that you... You might have to pay. this somebody who lives in your house? Is this somebody who lives across the world? Who is that person? Who are those group? Who is that group of people that becomes? And I don't use this term a ton, but who really truly in this, in this instance is your safe space?

(28:51) Louise Neil: Yeah. Yeah. Hahaha

(30:00) Louise Neil: Yeah, it's, and it's something that we we do not think about creating. We don't think about creating, right, this, this team of resourceful people, or even think about what that is, or practice what what's happening until it's too late. Well, not too late, but until we're knee deep in it all.

(30:29) Kim Romain: Yeah. I mean, sometimes it is and that's the other part of this is we, right? Yeah. We want to prepare for... So I used to do estate planning. Yes, we want to prepare for the worst and we want to also prepare for the most likely. And the most likely is we're going to be knee deep, neck deep into something. Life's going to feel shitty. Something's going to feel uncomfortable. You're not going to know who to talk to. So who is that person or people? Or organizations or situations that you can put yourself into that you can say, okay. I have this thing. Because there's too much of our lives that we don't. We don't talk about, we don't connect with. It's the purpose of us having these conversations week after week is because we want to be talking about the things that people aren't talking about. the very real fact of it is, in our worlds, in our circles, we are having these conversations all the Right, most people are not.

(30:29) Louise Neil: And what Right. Right.

(31:28) Louise Neil: Yeah, but even in that even even in this circle that I'm in, even in the profession that I'm in, and in this in this place of like, to deeply understand, right, how to navigate a midlife transition in your career in your life, your health, whatever that is. I'm still, I want to say getting it wrong, but I'm still knee deep sometimes. Right. And, and yet, that's okay. Right? It's okay. But I have a bit. have a plan. I have my people who say, Hey, I think you're knee deep. And those people are also the people I say, Hey, I'm knee deep. Right? Can you give me a hand? I need some help out of this. And yeah.

(32:18) Kim Romain: Thinking about the conversation that I told you about earlier where somebody offered me a hand yesterday and I was like, fuck you. I don't want the hand right now. Now I know that that person is always there, that that hand is always there, but in that moment I didn't want the hand. The hand didn't feel right. So also having the freedom to be in those spaces and say, yeah, I don't actually want it. I'm aware enough. when I need it, I'll ask for it. And it's that reminder that we are in the right spaces, right? We're in the, and I'm not saying like correct spaces, but we're in the spaces that allow us to fully be ourselves.

(32:23) Louise Neil: Yeah.

(32:53) Louise Neil: Break. Yeah. And ourselves like who we are now. Right? Like, not that thing in the past. Yeah.

(33:06) Kim Romain: Yeah, not that thing in the past that we were doing.

(33:13) Louise Neil: Yeah, it's interesting. It's interesting times. I haven't said that in a while. It's interesting times. I think especially now to kind of think about all of the things that are happening. Right. And so here, here we are going through this transition and this change in our bodies in our lives and our, our brains in, in who we are trying to figure that out. Plunk that in the middle of right. Countries finding their own identity and what that is and what that's like. And that's also something right like who am I? Who am I as a Canadian? Who are you as an American? What does that mean to us now? And then overlay that into what you talk about is also cosmically. what else is going on and how are we connecting and identifying like and we start to question that even in a bigger way.

(34:15) Kim Romain: The cosmic.

(34:27) Kim Romain: Yep, yep. Well, and, and. It's these, these are not new. These are not new conversations. They're new for us because where we are in our life journey, they're new for us because we've not had to deal with this particular border issue in the past, right? It's new for us because we've not experienced what the cosmos is throwing at us right now. So for us, as individuals right here on the screen, for us as individuals who are alive, collectively who are alive right now, we've not experienced any of this before. This is all new for all of us. And yet when we look back over the timeline of human beings, humans have experienced similar things, different circumstances, but similar things. And each time we cycle through it as, as a species to go back to that evolution, we are evolving, but it's not always the evolution that we necessarily think we want or that we're supposed to do, or we should be doing evolution to rate is bumpy evolution is nonlinear. And yet we are, we are evolving. I don't think that can be denied.

(35:39) Louise Neil: You.

(35:57) Louise Neil: Right? Yeah. So what's so when you think about that, what's what's helpful to know about about that? Like, so if I can say, Okay, yeah, I'm, I've accepted, I've accepted that my evolution is, is going to turn out. It's gonna turn out whatever it is on the other side of this. It's gonna turn out. Is that all I need? Is all I need is like a new belief that it's gonna be fine on the other side of this and that makes it okay?

(36:37) Kim Romain: I don't know, is that all you need? I mean, that would not be enough for me.

(36:41) Louise Neil: Yeah.

(36:42) Kim Romain: But that may be enough for others. And who's to say that's wrong? So for me, that's where I go to this place of... I want to know what the cosmos is doing. I want to know the timeline of humanity. I want to see the narratives and the stories as they've played out over time. want, I'm curious. Now, I'm not a historian. I'm not an astrologer. I'm not like, I'm not any of those things that steeps themselves in one aspect. I'm somebody who looks at the patterns, who looks at the dynamics, the shifting dynamics, who kind of. steps back and sees the totality of what is happening. And that brings me peace. Because seeing myself and my life and the choices that I make in my life, yes, in conjunction with my partner and with our child and like all of that, but for me, I still get the autonomy to choose my life separate and apart from the people in my life. That it... It reminds me of, thread, I'm not going to remember which philosopher said this, but in one of my philosophy classes in college, there, we discussed this idea of the timeline the... The timeline of humanity and beyond is this tapestry and each of us is one threat, one piece of one thread that weaves it all together. So we can't truly take in the entire tapestry, but we can understand that we're a part of it. And so for me, knowing that I'm a part of it, knowing that my being here has purpose and meaning. and I may not fully understand and comprehend what that is, but I can play with it, see what, you know, experiment with it throughout my lifetime to make, to make sure that when I'm done with this body. my life had meaning for me. And ideally because of who I am, that that was a effect and it impacted other people's lives as well. That's what I need in these times. But that's me.

(39:00) Louise Neil: Right.

(39:01) Kim Romain: I know that doesn't help other people and actually overwhelms other people. So I'm like, great, fantastic, then don't use it. What helps you in these moments?

(39:08) Louise Neil: Right. Well, so absolutely. There's there's for me there's power and knowledge in that it is a transition, right? Like that, that what is happening right now has a beginning a middle and an end. And I don't know that I need to know where I am in that in that transition necessarily, but it has some type of yeah over there-ness right like on the other side there is something else that that absolutely 100 % helps me because it feels to me like movement you and I've talked about this before but it feels like movement to me and so so that's super important for me what I need oftentimes in the moment is to know that as two things is that I'm not alone in that transition in in whatever that is and people are in their own timelines, right, but I'm still not alone in in this moment. And and I am like, and I am and that's, that's cool. Because this life that I'm living gets to be my story that nobody else can ever write. And so those things absolutely are the things that I need to be able to kind of navigate when things start to feel wobbly. And yeah, and with those tools, I feel like That's how I go through life. Now, is it always top of mind? No. Does it feel like I'm alone sometimes? 100%. Do I feel like I can't write my story? Absolutely. Sometimes I'm staring at a blank page, but I'm staring at a page in my book, right? And I am, sooner or later, some words will fall out of my head and find themselves on a page, right? Like I need to, I trust in that. I trust. that the universe has my back, really. That we will get through it. We will, in however that looks, there is the other side. Yeah.

(40:34) Kim Romain: Mm-hmm.

(41:52) Kim Romain: And it's so interesting because totally different words, totally different metaphors put in there. And yet we talked about very much similar things, right? A tapestry can't be made from one thread alone. So of course there are others involved and there are some that are really, really close to you. So that concept, as you said it, I was like, yeah, I feel that when I, when I think of that tapestry and I don't walk around with, I, right. I don't walk around with that image in my head all the time. but it is in those times where I feel like I'm unraveling and therefore the whole thing is unraveling. Right? It's like, no, no, no, no, no, it's okay. This may just need to be re-sewn and we're okay. Right? So yeah, I love that. And I love how we each have our own way of seeing it.

(42:18) Louise Neil: Right.

(42:26) Louise Neil: Sure. Yeah.

(42:44) Kim Romain: And it comes back to some level of acceptance that starts from awareness, that comes from a belief. And that belief, right, probably has evolved over, I know mine has evolved over your lifetime. That concept of the universe has your back, right? Which I would very much say is the same that I believe. It's interesting because I still don't use those words all the time, but yeah, I'm done with that. So if that's the belief, then you have to have the awareness that there is the universe to have your back. and an acceptance that, yes, that is the belief that I'm accepting.

(43:21) Louise Neil: Sure.

(43:27) Louise Neil: Right. And we're going to circle back to that word, like to me, that's my evolution. Right? Right? That's, that's my, that's where I'm at. That's, that's how I've evolved. That's how I'm evolving. That's how I will evolve in the future is, is through that. And absolutely, I am definitely not the same person. None of us are the same people we were 20 years ago. And yet, sometimes we hang on to that too tight. Like we gotta let it go so that we can continue to evolve and find our way through.

(43:33) Kim Romain: Yeah. Yes.

(44:12) Kim Romain: Yeah. mean, my thought there is if we're not evolving, what are we doing?

(44:18) Louise Neil: Yeah, we're bumping through life.

(44:22) Kim Romain: Yeah, and that I'm not, that I'm not down for.

(44:27) Louise Neil: I don't know, we might come back to this conversation because I think that there is, I still think there's some nugget here around like the bumping through life because it happens to us all. where we get stuck on autopilot a little and we just we just are instead of being we are just right the doing and we're not even aware of the difference and and yet right yeah

(45:04) Kim Romain: Yeah, I'd love to revisit that with you, that concept of autopilot and how much of our lives we do spend, because I don't disagree. I know I've been there. How much of our lives are on autopilot and how much we are seeking to be on autopilot. I think there's another thing there as well.

(45:20) Louise Neil: Yeah, yeah. Ooh, look at that. Nuggets, nuggets, nuggets. Good conversation. Yeah, I really, I really appreciate it. So thank you.

(45:24) Kim Romain: Ooh, good stuff. Ooh, thanks, Louise. Yeah, thank you. Anything you want to let the world know before we say goodbye?

(45:38) Louise Neil: As always, join me over on Substack at the RAG and I'd love people to leave their comments and their thoughts. I love that. I'm really loving Substack and the interaction and the community that's being built around that just feels really different to me. It's a lot of fun. Yeah. How about you, Kim? What's going on?

(46:03) Kim Romain: Well, I went kicking and screaming into Substack and I too am enjoying it. There are all sorts of things around integrity and ethics and I really struggled with it. And I decided to experiment and yeah, I'm glad that I did. Yeah, I'd say, look, if you're down for an experiment learning how to pull these different aspects, these different parts of yourself together, What in whatever you're leading, whether it's a community, whether it's a business, whether it's a movement, whatever it is. that's what I talk about over on Substack and that's what I help people do. So come be part of the conversation, reach out to me directly. in whatever way feels good to utilize that primal voice that comes up in your body and just say, whatever that word is that needs to come out. I'm here all in space for it.

(46:59) Louise Neil: I love that. Thank you everyone for being here on this journey with us and yeah, happy evolution.

(47:09) Kim Romain: Happy evolution. I love that. Okay, everyone.

(47:11) Louise Neil: All right, everyone, bye for now.

(47:13) Louise Neil: And that's all for this week's episode of the Empowered and Embodied Show. We hope today's episode has sparked something within you. Remember, we're all on this journey together. If something did resonate with you today, why not share it with a friend who might need to hear it too? You can find us everywhere you listen to podcasts. Don't forget to subscribe so you never miss an episode. And if you're feeling generous, leave a review. Your feedback not only helps others find the show, but also helps us understand what's most valuable to you. Until next time, be kind to yourself, stay curious, and remember, we're walking right alongside you. Thanks for being part of our community.