Good Neighbor Podcast: Tri-Cities
Bringing together local businesses and neighbor of the Tri-Cities region. Good Neighbor Podcast hosted by Skip Mauney helps residents discover and connect with your local business owners in and around The Tri-Cities.
Is your business serving the residents of Tri-Cities? Then, we need to talk! Visit gnpTri-Cities.com to schedule your free interview.
Good Neighbor Podcast: Tri-Cities
EP# 222: Men's Emotional Freedom: Banks Anderson's Journey from Pain to Purpose
What makes Banks Anderson with Banks Anderson Massage and Bodywork a good neighbor?
What happens when men are given permission to feel? Banks Anderson knows firsthand the transformative power of emotional vulnerability for men. After hitting rock bottom - quitting his job, moving from his home, and eventually landing in jail - Banks discovered that his greatest pain held the seeds of his purpose.
Today, Banks runs groups that create safe spaces for men to express difficult emotions and confront personal challenges. "Men are capable of so much, and that's why there's so much pressure put on them," Banks shares with host Skip Monty. His organization helps men break free from societal expectations that force them to suppress their feelings, often leading to destructive anger outbursts that damage relationships with partners, children, and colleagues.
Banks challenges common misconceptions about masculinity with refreshing clarity. "Men are human. They're not born to be bad or harmful," he explains, pushing back against narratives that paint all men as oppressors. His work reveals that when given the right environment, men naturally move away from isolation and passivity toward community and responsibility. This transformation isn't just theoretical - Banks witnessed it hundreds of times across his career working with men from all walks of life.
The conversation takes a powerful turn when Banks shares his personal journey through addiction to healing. "Jail was actually a really positive experience for me," he admits, describing how confinement forced him to sit with feelings he'd been avoiding. "Welcoming people into the things I was scared to show... made a massive difference." For men seeking similar transformation, Banks offers regular monthly events, one-on-one coaching, and retreats, including an upcoming "Pilgrimage for Peace" in Costa Rica. Ready to discover what happens when you let go of who you think you should be and embrace who you truly are? This conversation is your first step.
To learn more about Banks Anderson Massage and Bodywork go to:
https://www.banks-anderson.com/
Banks Anderson Massage and Bodywork
(828) 334-2489
This is the Good Neighbor Podcast, the place where local businesses and neighbors come together. Here's your host, Skip Monty.
Speaker 2:Hello everyone and welcome to the Good Neighbor Podcast. So we've got a very special guest with us here today in the studio and I am super excited to learn all about him and what he does. And I'm sure you will be too, because today I have the pleasure of introducing your good neighbor, Mr Banks Anderson, who is the owner and operator of a couple of businesses. But today we're talking about Banks Anderson's men group. So, Banks, welcome to the show. Hi, thanks so much for having me. It's good to be here. We're thrilled to have you, Like I said, very interested in learning all about your men's group leadership and what you do. So, if you don't mind, why don't you kick us off by telling us about Banks Anderson?
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah. So essentially, I have an organization and I create spaces for men to show up and talk about the things that may be difficult to express or speak of and to feel, you know, because it's not a typical thing, it's not something that men are trained to do. So we create a space for men to come together and do that and face and confront the things that may be challenging them or the burdens that they carry, so that they can show up to their life with vitality and responsibility and capability and, as well as compassion, to really hold responsibility for the things that they want to do in their life, whether it's work, relationship, family, whatever it is they want to do in their life, whether it's work, relationship, family, whatever, it is Awesome.
Speaker 3:Well, bex, how did you? It's unique. How did you get into this business? I essentially got into it because I needed it I.
Speaker 3:There was a time in my life where I kind of recognized I really needed things to change. So I essentially quit my job, moved out of my home, traveled for a little while and just explored who I was and recognized that I was carrying a lot of grief, you know. And in that process I didn't know where to turn, who to talk to about it. Just the pain, the things that I experienced growing up I didn't really have a place for. And I decided to gather some men together and begin creating that process for myself and for the men around me, and I was shocked by how impactful it was for all of the men.
Speaker 3:And over time I I just couldn't get away from it. Something in me just wanted to keep doing it, and so I followed that trail and it eventually became a business. You know that more and more men wanted to come to groups. More and more men needed a space to confront these things that no one had really taught them how or given them a chance to. And so now I'm working with men in a group format as well as one on one, to support them and who they actually are and not this image of who they think they're supposed to be.
Speaker 2:Wow, I'm blown away. As I mentioned before we got on, I just attended a men's retreat a couple of weeks ago and it was fantastic and life-changing from my personal experience, transformational, absolutely so. What are some myths or misconceptions in the men's support group business?
Speaker 3:well, I think it depends on who you ask, but some of the things that come up for me, um, are, you know, that it's weak, uh, for a man to have emotions or to express what's actually going on inside of him, and this really creates a process of him suppressing and bottling things up, and oftentimes that can come out in the form of anger, you know, and it can be really hard for his children, his community members, his work, his partner, whoever it is. Usually, at some point he can't hold it in anymore anger and grief. It really needs support and attention. So I actually want to change that and look towards, um, what it is that men can do to tend to those things. Um, so that's definitely one thing that I see as a major misconception.
Speaker 3:Another is, you know, there's this term, patriarchy, which is carries a weight or a heaviness to it depending on who you ask, and essentially what I mean by that is a system of oppression, and a lot of people identify all men as oppressive. Because of that, and in my experience I've held hundreds of men through their pain and really seen what's going on. And it's just not true. Men are human. They're not born to be bad or harmful, though we have caused harm and it's important to really look at that. Generally, men are human, human and they want good, they want to do well. They just haven't been given the tools and environment to thrive.
Speaker 2:Wow, very, very true. Men are expected to be a lot of things that we aren't necessarily and shouldn't be, but anyway, I hear what you're saying. So, outside of work, if there is time outside of work, what do you do for fun?
Speaker 3:Yeah, there is. There is there is Because it's really important to me and I do try to live it, you know, and I love being out in the natural world and right now, you know, I live just outside of Asheville and it's absolutely incredible right now to see things like the spring, spring ephemerals and the flowers, and I love to go swimming in the river.
Speaker 3:I love spending time with my community members and doing things like potlucks and, uh, I have my daughter's on this too and I don't know if there's I mean that brings me more joy than spending time with her and watching her, because she changes so much so fast so quick, so quick and when the blink of an eye.
Speaker 2:My youngest is 22. And if you, you know, 10 years ago I thought, yeah, it'll be a blink of an eye. It absolutely is, absolutely yeah. So if let's switch gears for a second, if you could describe a hardship or a life challenge that you've overcome, either through you know, personally or professionally, and came out stronger on the other side, does anything come to mind?
Speaker 3:Sure thing.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I used to spend a lot of time in kind of the party culture and I was consuming a lot of alcohol and different drugs and really trying to get away from this discomfort that I had and I didn't really know what to do with it, kind of like I spoke to earlier.
Speaker 3:No one had shown me the way and slowly over time I began to learn how to face those things. But, you know, it wound me up in jail. I was growing cannabis and selling it and it became a pretty big mess and jail was actually a really positive experience for me. It really helped me sit with a lot that I hadn't been looking at and I slowly over time, started to talk about the things that were going on inside of me, things that happened in my childhood, I have to say, like welcoming in people to the things that I was scared to show or didn't like about myself. Welcoming people into that and also allowing other people to welcome me in that really made a massive difference. You know, it was like at some point I chose to take responsibility for my past, who I was, where I came from, and that responsibility has given me so much freedom.
Speaker 2:Wow. So and I'm a firm believer in this too is hardship is a pathway to peace, and joy comes from suffering, which is, you know, biblical, but true, I mean it's just 100% Very good. Well, banks, if you could think of one thing you would like our listeners to remember about Banks Anderson, what would that be?
Speaker 3:Men are capable of so much and that is why there's so much pressure put on them, on us, and given the right environment, men will thrive and there is so much beauty that has come, that can come from that, and I have seen it so many times, with hundreds of men transforming, taking responsibility, taking accountability, um building community, actually letting people in and moving away from passivity or the lone wolf and really letting what is inside them out and transform them, inspire them into the man that they want to be very good thing to remember for sure.
Speaker 2:Yeah, um, for for those that uh, uh are of our listeners that are interested and have a need and and, or you know, think this is just the right thing for them, how can they learn more?
Speaker 3:yeah, so you can go to banks-andersoncom and there's two areas you can go to. You can go to body work, which I do just north of Asheville, and then you can also click the section that says men's work, and I have regular monthly events. You can work with me one-on-one. And also I have a retreat coming up this July. It'll be in Costa Rica, actually it's called Pilgrimage for Peace, and we still have a retreat coming up this july. It'll be in costa rica. Actually it's called pilgrimage for peace, and we still have a few spots left, um, and that's going to be a uh. Oh, my gosh, I'm so excited for it.
Speaker 2:So, yeah, nice and that you said that's in july, that's in july, yeah, and this autumn um.
Speaker 3:in late autumn I'll be hosting a 12 week men's breathwork intensive as well Awesome.
Speaker 2:They're pretty opportunities. Wonderful. Well, thanks Can't tell you how much I appreciate you taking time out of your busy schedule. You run multiple businesses, Um, so we appreciate you sharing your story and journey with me and and with our listeners and um, and wish you and your family, your daughter and all the men you help and thank you for that, by the way All the best. Moving forward.
Speaker 3:Skip, thank you so much. It's a pleasure to meet you and I'm so glad you've had a taste of men's work as well.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and maybe we can have you back on the show sometime when you've got a you know, a retreat or something coming up.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I would love that.
Speaker 2:Truly, all right, we'll. We'll look forward to that and hope you have a great rest of the afternoon.
Speaker 3:Skip. Thank you so much.
Speaker 1:Thank you for listening to the good neighbor podcast to nominate your favorite local businesses to be featured on the show to gnp try-citiescom. That's gnp try-citiescom, or call 423-719-5873.