363. Love Is Not Self-Seeking (Way of Love)

Ever notice how fast a small irritation can turn into a quiet grudge? We unpack one of the most searching lines in 1 Corinthians 13—love does not insist on its own way—and follow the thread from denied preference to sharp tone to a mental ledger that never forgets. Along the way, we name why “have it your way” lodges so easily in the heart and why humility, not willpower, is the only route out of resentment’s loop.

We walk through everyday moments where self tries to climb the throne: the meeting where our idea gets shelved, the household plan that shifts without our input, the friend who overlooks our view. Then we draw a straight line to the inner courtroom where scorekeeping begins. You’ll hear a simple but piercing diagnosis—irritability is often wounded self-love. We point to Jesus Christ as the living pattern of “Not my will, but yours be done,” the one who endured betrayal and injustice without a trace of sin, no snap, no frost, no stored offense.

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I Corinthians 13:4c-5

Transcript

Welcome And Series Context

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Hi friend and welcome to Moments of Worship on this Friday, March the 6th. This podcast seeks to be an encouragement to you in the worship of Almighty God each weekday. We continue our Way of Love series from 1 Corinthians 13. Love does not insist on its own way. It is not irritable or resentful. At the heart of this verse is self. Love does not insist on its own way. You remember the crooner Frank Sinatra when he famously sang, I did it my way, or maybe the Burger King commercial that used to be out, have it your way. And if we're honest, that line resonates with us. We kind of like it. We like things to go our way, don't we? The decision in the meeting that follows our preference or the plans in the home that align with our expectations. But what happens when we don't get our way? Paul says love is not irritable. When self is denied, irritation often comes to the surface. Maybe it's through a sharp tone, a shorter fuse, a visible frustration. Irritability is often wounded self-love. Say that again. Irritability is often wounded self-love. And if that irritation is not checked, it hardens. And when it hardens, love becomes resentful. But love is not supposed to be resentful. Resentment keeps score. You know, like when you go play putt-putt and you write down the score of each person by what hole when it happened, how many they got. It replays the offense. It stores the slight for later use. Well maybe your spouse handled something differently than you would have, or a friend overlooked your opinion, or maybe if you're a student didn't sit with you at youth group, or maybe didn't eat with you at the lunch table at school. Maybe a leader made a decision you would not have made. And slowly but quietly resentment grows. This is self-seeking and self-protecting. I kind of thought of it like this humility and resentment do not go to the dance together, right? Love loosens its grip on preference. Love does not demand the throne. Love does not keep a mental ledger. As we reflect on these things, it kind of exposes where we are, doesn't it? It's convicting. We insist, we flare up, we rehearse wrongs. So where do we turn? Well, we want to come back to the gospel always. We look to Jesus Christ, the author and finisher of our faith. We hope in him. The one who did not insist on his own way, but prayed, Not my will, but yours be done. The one who endured misunderstanding, betrayal, and injustice, yet did not respond with any sin at all, no irritation, no stored resentment. We do not become unself seeking by trying harder. We become less self-centered as we behold the self-giving Savior and humble ourselves before Him and ask for His grace. Dear friend, love does not insist on its own way. It is not irritable or resentful. Today and every day, may we love with the love of Jesus Christ to all people that we meet each moment of the day. Well, friend, until tomorrow and forever, may we worship Jesus Christ. Thank you for listening.