Honest Christian Conversations

Good Parenting Isn't Easy (MINISODE)

Ana Murby Season 5

Have you ever felt that uncomfortable nudge from God about your parenting? That's precisely what happened to me after my conversation with Pastor Josh Poteet. 


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Speaker 1:

Hey friends, welcome back to another mini-sode. How are you doing with your parenting? That's your question for this week and we're going to start with that today because I want to give you a little bit of an update on how I'm doing with my parenting. If you haven't listened to this most recent episode that I did with Pastor Josh Poteet from 180 Life Church in West Hartford, you need to go back and listen to that, because at some point in that interview I mentioned how I had a situation with my parenting that I felt convicted on and I needed to work on that. So if you haven't listened to the episode yet, stop this and listen first. Before you listen to this, it'll be helpful for you to understand the rest of this mini-sode. All right, for those who are staying, because you did listen to it. I mentioned how I felt convicted about how we need to be less selfish, we need to be there for our children in ways that we may not really want to be, and he mentioned how he painted way too many paper mache unicorns with his daughter and he hates art, but he does it because he loves her, and that whole part really convicted me, because I had mentioned it in the episode that I'm not really a hands-on type of parent. I'm not the one who's gonna play Barbies with my daughters or cars with my son or do a lot of drawing and art stuff. I'm not very good at it for one, but that's just the way that I've been as a parent. I'm just not quite like that. You know, I'll watch you do it, but I don't really participate. Video games is probably the only area where I usually will participate with them, but I had mentioned how I felt convicted by that that I need to work harder on that, and I said that I was going to work harder on that. So I wanted to give you a little bit of an update on how I'm working on being a better parent and being more present With my kids home for the summer. They're all over the place. All four of them are home, and if you're listening to this around the time that I originally recorded this, then my eldest is also visiting us too, so that was awesome to have her visit for us.

Speaker 1:

But I have been working harder on being more intentional with my children If they ask for my help, instead of blowing them off or saying, oh, I'll do it in a little bit. I will take a breath and then I'll get up and I'll go do what they want. And it's been. It's not easy, I will be honest. It has not been easy because sometimes I'm about to go do a chore, or I need to go do this, or I want to go do this, and they'll say, but mom, you never do this with me or I want to do this with you, and it just makes me feel bad because they're probably right. So I've been more intentional on just being there for them in the ways they want me to. So I'll draw ugly little stick figures, because I'm not very good at drawing, but they wanted me to draw. I'll play video games with my son and you know I'll do the things that they want to do. If they want to stay up a little later and watch something, I'll watch that with them. If they want to watch a movie in general, I'll watch a movie with them.

Speaker 1:

It's been hard on me because sometimes I just need a mental break, especially during the summertime when they're home, and I don't get that luxury of having that break while they're at school. So it's been harder but God has been good to me and in the mornings it's been pretty relaxed, even if they are up early. I have time to myself to spend with God, and that has been what's been really helpful for me in doing this new endeavor that I'm trying, in being more available to the kids. Whether I want to be or not, putting God first has been helpful. It's been reminding me that he comes first. Everything else is secondary, and I'm working on remembering that my children are a gift and at any point in time he could take them home, and I want to make sure that I leave a lasting memory on them. Should I go before them and I just I want them to want to be near me. I want them to know that I love them, and their love language is not the same as mine. They have a lot of energy. I don't really have a lot of energy, but I want to show them how much I love them, so I am working on being more available to them.

Speaker 1:

So again, here's your question how are you doing with your parenting? Where are you feeling that conviction that God is telling you you need to do more? Or perhaps you need to do less if your children are older, and maybe you're what is it called helicoptering? Or you're just enabling too much. Maybe he's telling you to back off Whatever he's telling you to do. You need to do that Because if you're not, you're sinning. That's what it says in James. We don't want to be caught sinning, willfully sinning. That's definitely not good.

Speaker 1:

So if you're feeling that God is telling you to pull back or to push forward, it's going to take sacrifice, like Pastor Josh Poteet mentioned in the episode that we did together. It does take sacrifice. Trust me, it takes a lot of sacrifice, especially when it's hot and humid and I'm cranky and all I want to do is just sit and relax in a cool room and not do anything. And then one of my children wants to sit right next to me and they're extra warm and I feel like I just put a blanket on, but they just want to cuddle and watch something with me. I have to be okay with that, because I'm showing them the love of Jesus. It's okay to have self care, but you can't put that on such a high pedestal that you forget or neglect everything and everyone else.

Speaker 1:

And it's a journey. It's definitely going to be a journey, but I have enjoyed it. My children, I know they enjoy it too, seeing me work harder on trying to be more present for them and in the spirit of that, like I said at this specific moment that I am recording this, my eldest came back for a visit and she wants to dye her hair. We're going to do it together and sure hope it turns out well. She's got a hat just in case something goes haywire, but it'll be a nice fun project to do with her. It's been a long time since I've seen her in person, so this will be a nice adventure for both of us. So with that I'm going to let you go. Have a wonderful day, god bless.

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