The ConverSAYtion
The ConverSAYtion is simply a couple of middle aged men sharing company and conversation. Psych and K take their time sorting through so much to say about society, culture, relationships, education, finance, technology, health, and more. Inspired to find engaging ways to entertain and enrich the lives of their listeners is their primary pursuit. Join them as they invest themselves in providing value to their audience. Welcome to The ConverSAYtion.
The ConverSAYtion
Line-Cutters and Dining Disasters: A Comedic Journey Through Daily Annoyances
Ever felt like you were the star of your own commuter horror story? Letter K joins us as we share tales from the traffic trenches, with hilarious anecdotes and musings about the daily grind. From the dance of dodging line-cutters to the art of keeping your cool when others test your patience, we explore the quirky world of pet peeves on the road. Our conversation uncovers the ethical dilemmas and comedic moments of navigating heavy traffic, with Letter K lending his unique perspective as someone who knows a thing or two about late-night escapades and juggling hectic schedules.
The episode shifts gears to tackle the often unspoken challenges of dining etiquette and sanitation. We're diving fork-first into our pet peeves in the dining scene, from the cringe of witnessing poor hygiene in casual eateries to the joys and perils of fine dining. This lively discussion will have you laughing as we navigate the nuances of dining out, all while keeping an eye on the societal quirks that make us tick.
Wrapping things up with a debate on the phrase "pet peeves," we question why discussions on annoyances need a specific label. Does the term itself drive you crazy? You're not alone, just ask Psych.
You don't gotta do it if you don't want to. You don't gotta do it if you don't want to. You don't gotta do it if you don't want to. It's just a suggestion.
Speaker 2:Cheers.
Speaker 1:Welcome back to the conversation. I am Letter K With me. As always is Syke, as always a psych, new topic day, my turn to choose, and I've had. The last couple few weeks have been driving for me. I've been going nonstop. I'm doing late night stuff in the middle of the week. I'm everywhere. I've got my friendship maintenance tour is just in full swing and stress attached to that. And of course now we're into the holidays and at work. You know, at work we're really good about getting stuff done on time, but over the last few weeks things have not been going well, so we've been going over. So everything's just like.
Speaker 1:I'm really trying hard to not be irritated by life Because you know I mean, at the end of the day everything's going to work out just fine. You know I'm not protecting the president and everything has been working out fine. In fact we finally caught up this week and everything is back to normal. But it made me think about the things that irritate us and get stuck in our craw. So we're going to do pet peeves for the next two episodes. Sounds amazing. Yeah, I can't wait to hear your thoughts on my first pet peeve. All right, so I thought you know that maybe we would do, we'd go back and forth. I really think that there's some things that we could get in depth. So I thought maybe we would go back and forth. I really think that there are some things that we could get in depth if we want to, or we could just jump around, but if I do a topic, and then you do a topic.
Speaker 2:Yeah, see where this goes. Or do you want to go first? No, please, by all means, okay, so I'm a commuter.
Speaker 1:You know this, I do, yeah, and you have, in your time, been a super commuter.
Speaker 2:Super commuter? Yeah you. So I'm a super consumer and I once was a super commuter.
Speaker 1:You are super bro, so I mean, at your height, what was your longest average drive time to get to work?
Speaker 2:Two and a half hours.
Speaker 1:One way, yeah, one way, yeah. I work with a guy. One of the guys on my team comes to the lab from Roseville and he's doing three, three and a half one way. But you know, love to have him, so glad he stays.
Speaker 2:It's difficult, it takes commitment. You have to want to be there, you have to want to do that, you have to be motivated. And where I was working at the time, I knew the commute was. I was making sacrifices as far as family, as far as time, as far as my physical health. All of that took a toll, but the people I had the opportunity to work with made it worth it.
Speaker 1:Oh well, that's. That's. That's good. And me, you know, I do like the team that I work with. I like the place where I work. I actually love my job and I have driven farther for more stress, for less, much less pay and for a job that I didn't really like all the time. So, yeah, it's not so bad.
Speaker 1:However, my pet peeve is people who jump the commuter lines. You know we're talking about how you know how you're trying to get into the Bay Area and there's a. There are two dozen ways to get. You know so many different little nooks and crannies, but every single one has a point where you've just got a line of cars that goes back for two miles and you have to start in that line and you've got to sit through. But then you've got these people who either burn down the uh, down the side lane, like like off on the shoulder, or down a turn lane or something, and then get all the way up to the front and then stop, stop their car, turn in just a little bit and turn their blinker on like, oh, can I get in right now? That shit pisses me off, because you know we're all in this together and they're making they're making everybody else's commute worse just by selfishly trying to interject themselves so that they can get to work. What? 10, 15 minutes faster, two minutes faster than what's the distance?
Speaker 2:so are you talking about somebody? Because I know they have those express lanes that you no, not necessarily on the freeway.
Speaker 1:No, I mean like so I work in Livermore and a lot of the ways to get into Livermore. You drive through Tracy and you get these places where you've got to basically get into a line to get on the freeway or get into one of the side roads, streets, yeah.
Speaker 1:And it's a single lane, sure, and that's the kind of stuff I'm talking about the person who, who, or getting off the freeway, you know you get. You get in this huge line to get off the freeway so you can make a left or a right turn or whatever, and everyone's making the same turn. And then you got this dude or this chick or this person who is just burning down the shoulder, like like just fingering everybody on the way down.
Speaker 2:Not literally on the shoulder have you seen that too.
Speaker 1:Oh, of course, all the time.
Speaker 2:Yeah, that bothers me If people are driving on the shoulder, but it's the same thing too.
Speaker 1:You've got this line of cars that goes back as far as the beginning of time and everybody has committed themselves to waiting in this line, Sure. And then you've got somebody who drives down an unused turn lane that has a solid white line and the lane ends where it requires you to turn, right. They get all the way to the end of that and then they turn their blinker on like hey, can I get in? Yeah, that, Hmm right.
Speaker 2:They get all the way to the end of that, and then they turn their blinker on like, hey, can I get in?
Speaker 1:yeah, that, hmm, I, so I, I really want, I really want you to be honest with me about your feelings on this topic.
Speaker 2:So so I've been, that I've been. I know you have. I know you have, I know you have. I've been that guy. I've got you, and for me I didn't always. So I used to agree with you 100%. I used to agree with you hey, let's just all do our part, we'll all get there together. We'll all get there faster if we do this. However, after driving to the Bay Area 70, 75 miles one way, spending two to three hours, sometimes almost four hours in traffic when people just wreck your day right and trying to navigate myself appropriately as a motorist, and then seeing everybody else hack their way through or somehow they've cracked the code, they're getting to their destination sooner I was like you know what? No, I'm going to. If you can't beat them, join them. No, I'm gonna if. If you can't beat them, join them.
Speaker 2:And uh, so there there's one example that I travel to on the, on the way to work, and the freeway splits to another into another freeway. So you have an on-ramp going this way, it's going to take you south, and an on-ramp going this way, it's going to take you north. And there is that, the, the wide white dashed lines that indicate that this lane is going to go this way. It's going to end in this. It's. They're both considered exit only, right? Uh, they're not solid. It's not a solid white line. It's perfectly legal to go back and forth in between, and there there is a long line that usually occurs backed up a mile, maybe two, and I'll just get in the other lane. And you know what, when I can safely merge or change lanes, if there is an opening, it's usually it's usually in front of uh and not right in front. I'm not, I'm not ridiculous that guy?
Speaker 2:you're not that guy I understand that truckers and long-haul drivers and people that the tractor trailer deals 18 wheelers. I don't want to, I don't want to encroach into their braking uh distance, that that you know, that distance that they have allowed for safe braking. However, everyone's moving approximately 10, 15, 20 miles per hour and if there's a gap, that's for car lengths in front, I can fit in there perfectly fine. I'm not the person that just goes hey, I'm gonna fit myself into this. I definitely don't want to do that and I definitely don't want to do that and I definitely don't want to do that now because right after we had our last, last episode, I had to fix the car. Actually, I tried to fix the car, it didn't work, and now I have a new vehicle, so I don't want to. I don't want to mess that up, but no, I'm not about.
Speaker 2:I've never driven on the shoulder to pass anyone. Those people kind of um, they, uh, they, uh, they bother me, uh, I don't see a lot of them anymore because I don't commute as much, but sometimes there are people out there enjoy writing, they're just think they're going to get a, they're going to get away, and then I have, uh, as as far as the turn like if it's an exit-only lane. I don't usually get into exit-only lanes to pass people, unless it is just like two people driving right next to each other pacing each other at the slowest possible speed. I'll make an exception to do that, but I try not to do that at all. I really don't. I don't exception to do that, but I try not to do that at all. I really don't, I don't want to do that.
Speaker 1:You just came up with a dozen excuses for why you're that guy. Yeah, yeah, great. I'm not talking about driving 10, 15, 20 miles an hour. I'm talking about driving zero miles an hour and you're trying to get off the freeway, or you're down a long stretch, like the industrial parts of tracy say, and you're waiting at an, at a, at an intersection, and there are literally three, four hundred cars going all the way back, six, eight blocks, and the light is changing and you're, and you're, and you're progressing, you're advancing at a rate of five or six cars, a light change, and then that guy goes down the side and is like oh me, first pally.
Speaker 1:That is what irks me. You know, I don't mind people. If traffic's moving and people are trying to figure out how to get here, there, wherever they're, you know, whatever you, that doesn't bother me. It's the people and it's not everybody, it's. It's such a small percentage that it's worth mentioning that they suck. My proof is the simple fact that there is this massive line of people who are patiently waiting for their turn, and then this person is actually doing the entire line of disservice, actually slowing everybody down, more so by creating a need to stop everything to allow, somebody has to let them in eventually.
Speaker 1:You know, you know so it doesn't have to happen, but we know it does yeah, and eventually they will just, they will just run their car, and I've had this happen to me. You know, once in a while I will get it into my head that you know what? No, fuck this guy, I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna bumper the person in front of me and you in front of me, and you can just wait. As far as I'm concerned, you can wait forever. You can wait until your turn would have come up a half hour from now.
Speaker 2:So that part of me, that part of driving for me, I find incredibly entertaining and it's fun.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know you do.
Speaker 2:When I'm in the fast lane and you see somebody, there's somebody in front of you and there's a truck. So I'm in the number one lane, fast lane, number two lane, there's another car, there's a semi, and the car in front of me is preventing me from going any faster. But the person behind me, they may or may not know that we just can't go any faster and so they want to switch lanes to number two lane because they're going to try to pass me and get in front and it just absolutely makes my day to prevent them.
Speaker 1:You're creating a whole different slew of scenarios, and it's all tied to the fact that I'm pretty sure you're that guy now. No, no, traffic is not moving. We should go for a drive. Yeah, there's no maneuverability because traffic is going nowhere. And even though you're literally sitting so close to the car in front of you that you couldn't drop a piece of paper between your bumpers, that person will throw themselves in between you, honk even and be like why don't you let me in? Yeah, and I'm not letting you in because the line starts back there, bud.
Speaker 2:So what you just described right there, I don't do that, yeah, and I've never done that.
Speaker 1:It takes a particular type of asshole or stress, and so not necessarily I mean not everybody who, like you said, not everybody's doing that every time. I'm on the same commute path every day, so I do see the same cars doing that every time. I'm on the same commute path every day, so I do see the same cars doing that shit. So I know that people, those people exist. But some people, um, you know, fine, you know, if you, I don't have to worry about being late for work. I'm a salary employee. Uh, so I don't, that doesn't bother you. So I know that.
Speaker 1:And that some people the commute is stressful because, like you said, there's an accident somewhere deep up, you you know, against the freaking ocean, on 580. And it screws up everybody all the way into the valley. And now that person. You know they may be worried for their job, but it's still no excuse. Sorry, everybody's in the same boat as you. There's all this line of people that are stuck here If they got out of their house late or they don't have good time management or an accident is keeping them from getting to work on time. Every single person's in the same boat. So just grab an oar and let's go.
Speaker 2:And I have been in those lines where people have done what you're describing. You see them, we know it's exit. Only everybody's in the line to exit, only cars are moving by you at a much faster rate of speed and and I have as much as I've been commuting and watching the behavior of motorists, I can almost call out okay, that person, no, they don't want in, oh, okay. And then I just that person wants in, let's see. And you know what, if they get in, I applaud them. I'm like, hey, good for you, you did it.
Speaker 1:You were cheering on the bad guy. I'm happy for them. You're that dude.
Speaker 2:I cheering on the bad guy. I'm happy for that dude. I'm happy for them.
Speaker 1:I'm not encouraging the behavior but I'm glad it worked out for them. Yes, so my, my thought on the whole thing is that I want everybody to be safe, uh, I want everybody to get to where they're going me too, and that includes me yes, uh, but at the same time, what that person is doing is inherently unsafe, and they are, because of their own selfishness, running the risk of screwing up everybody's day, starting with themselves and the person that they directly communicate with when that occurs, and then every single person behind them.
Speaker 2:Just don't let it be you Don't, let them cut you off.
Speaker 1:See, I tried that. That was the point of my thing.
Speaker 2:If they didn't cut me off. I'm not upset with that. Hey, that person let them in. That person didn't do their job. The thing is, they should have done their job if they just closed that gap.
Speaker 1:But the thing is, you're in this line and the light's turning yellow and the person five cars in, and now you are coming up against the line and you have to stop. And but if that person didn't do that, it would have been your turn. Tell me, that isn't just infuriating.
Speaker 2:No, not usually, Usually. I well, I love to drive. I just love to drive anyway, and I would not have chosen to commute as long as I did, as far as I did, which was just insane, unless I did so. I love driving and I find people's behavior on the road just thoroughly amusing. I don't suffer from road rage. I'm rarely upset while driving. I don't, it doesn't bother me, I find it entertaining.
Speaker 1:So these anomalies, these, these isolated incidents that pop up every once in a while, it just I smile you must, you must have just lived this, this brilliant, beautiful commuter life, because there's no, there's no isolated incident about this. It is. For me, it's daily, it's five, six times a day and it's continuous. And yes, I don't, I don't suffer from road rage, I don. And it's continuous. And yes, I don't, I don't suffer from road rage, I don't. I've seen some shit on the roads where it's just like, wow, bro, damn calm down, but uh, but uh, it it does. It does detract from my enjoyment of, you know, traveling to work. I sometimes I listen to music, sometimes I listen to a podcast, sometimes I just like to sit and think, but all those things are ruined when this fucking dude all of those things are ruined.
Speaker 1:It has this far-reaching ability to destroy your drive that is the nature of a pet peeve is inexplicably. It allows you to, you know, to lose your, to lose your composure a little bit. It's something that that bothers you inexplicably to lose, so you have to lose your composure a little bit.
Speaker 2:It's something that bothers you inexplicably, so you have to lose your composure to embrace a pet peeve, Otherwise it wouldn't bother you.
Speaker 1:I mean yes, yes, you have to. I mean because, like you said, if you find entertainment in it, you can't be upset about it?
Speaker 2:No, I'm not upset about it.
Speaker 1:There's no, the definition of a pet peeve doesn't apply. If you're like, haha, that was kind of funny.
Speaker 2:That fool did that shit. No, it doesn't bother that. Obviously doesn't bother me anywhere near as much as it bothers you.
Speaker 1:Because you're that guy. We discovered that.
Speaker 2:Now everyone's going to think I'm this terrible, horrible, aggressive driver, although I will say, okay, recent trip to you are aggressive driver, a recent trip. I know I've taken a quiz. I, I understand I've, I am self-aware. But in san francisco, uh, me and my oldest were taking the taking a waymo and we were kind of what you were just describing. We're at a light, it's a turn on the lane and everyone's trying to turn and the Waymo was letting everybody in and I just wanted to jump in front and take control. I was like Waymo, you need some balls. Waymo, you need to get out there, do your job. We're trying to get to our destination. It's not working. The Waymo let another Waymo cut us off.
Speaker 1:You got Waymo'd by a.
Speaker 2:Waymo. We did, we did and in fact there was a bus that drove that made the turn, drove into oncoming traffic and cut us off as well. So this everybody's honking Road rage is all over the place. This was in, we were right by the the park. Um, oh, golden gate park. We're in golden gate park, we're trying to enter it.
Speaker 2:Anyway, we were, we were stopped forever. What should have been 10 minute drive was approaching 50 minutes. And so, wow, we, my boy and I, we got out, we, and walked 0.2 miles. It was to our destination. But, yes, uh, there is a time and place for aggressive driving, and sometimes I I view the aggressive driving like, if somebody's trying to pull around me, I'm in the fast lane, we're all stuck in traffic, there's nowhere else for you to go, and somebody thinks they're going to go squeeze in a perfect car length in front of me, me, pulling up and denying him. That is teaching them a lesson, and I'm a teacher and so, being an educator, I am responsible for getting all these lessons to the people that need them.
Speaker 1:You think you're teaching them a lesson. You are not. All you're doing is pissing them off like they're pissing me off because I'm the guy three cars behind you while you're playing this little game of cat and mouse pussyfooting with this dude.
Speaker 2:So when I pull into the number two lane, get out of the one lane, get out of the fast lane, because I think I'm going to pass, and if it turns out that I cannot or they don't let me in. I applaud them like good on them, they. They did their job that's.
Speaker 1:That's a totally different conversation. That's just self-awareness because you're that guy, so you can't get mad at somebody else for being that guy. No, yeah, that's not the point of what I'm trying to get across here. All of your examples traffic is moving. None of my examples is traffic going fast or even I mean like If you got out and did what they did then you would be moving. Does that count If I park my car and walk to work? Some days I could get there faster.
Speaker 2:Yes, you're all fired up.
Speaker 1:I feel better, I feel good, it's cathartic. The release. So my big statement for that is get in the fucking line. Don't be that guy. You know what. We're all heroes of society. We're all doing this together. We're all in the fucking line. Don't be that guy. You know what. We're all heroes of society. We're all doing this together. We're all on the same team. You're going to get there. I'm sorry if you're late for work. I'm sorry that your wife hates you. I don't know what the deal is, but don't be that guy.
Speaker 2:You could get there faster if you were that guy, though Maybe Possibly.
Speaker 1:Possibly says that guy All right, that's, that's, that's my, that's my, that's my pet peeve.
Speaker 2:Episode one rant Wow, that was it. That was a good one. How long did that go?
Speaker 1:20, 20 minutes, Easy. I let I let I let you talk about the exact opposite of what I was trying to get across. For a while, though, that's okay.
Speaker 2:I think you communicated yourself just fine through me yeah yeah, in spite of my, my poor examples that didn't align completely with your completely entirely at all.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but relevant, yes, we just yes in the in the larger discussion of traffic that applies yeah I like to drive.
Speaker 2:I like to drive fast and if I get there sooner than late, although I have been driving almost slower lately- yeah, yeah, because because your new car you're terrified of and I'm enjoying it, yeah, good good, good, yeah, I'm enjoying it, yeah but you are one of those, those people that tries to race the google map arrival time, aren't you? It's just a suggestion, it's not predetermined.
Speaker 1:No, it's they don't know what time I'm getting there. It updates as you go, yeah yeah, absolutely so.
Speaker 2:I guess for me I have. I, I mean, this is good. So what I'm about to say is kind of going to be trivial in nature and it doesn't have much depth, although if you want to discuss it, we can. But I can give you a more real, a more relevant example after, if you want. But I don't like pet peeves, I don't like the, I don't like the phrase. In fact, I'd never say it. The only reason I'm using this language and you're hearing it come out of my mouth and I'm articulating and pronouncing pet peeve together is because is because you want to talk about it. I don't really want to talk about it, because I find it incredibly annoying to freak myself, to say these words. I don't.
Speaker 1:So is it just because of the phrasing? I don't. The only reason I decided on pet peeves as a topic is because I thought it would create create a discussionary.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, I know we're going to have, but I don't, I don't generally get upset about things.
Speaker 1:Ever I can get worked up and I'm already over it. The whole driving thing. I do it every day. So I'm over it again and, again, and again, but it was just an easy way to foster some disagreement and some debate, perhaps. If I had presented it as hey, let's discuss something about society that you don't like. It's pet peeves. It's easier, it's more digestible and more advertizable and more advertisers.
Speaker 2:Okay, yeah, so I looked up the. I've always wanted to know the origin of the phrase, those words. How did they come to be? When did they come about? And apparently it goes back to the well early 20th century. So pet peeve essentially means a personal or special irritation that somebody finds particularly annoying, often to a degree that might seem excessive to others.
Speaker 1:So if their pet peeve is not your pet peeve, then it might just seem like this vast, drastic overreaction to the situation that generally tracks, because I kind of feel like you weren't on board with me with my pet peeve.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was not. Peeve is thought to be a variation or shortening of the word peevish, which so pet. Peeve essentially means a personal or special irritation that somebody finds particularly. Oh, okay, I already read that part. But the thing is, it's almost like this oxymoron, because things that are pets are cherished and liked and people want to have them, and then the peeve is that minor annoyance, that thing that irritates, that thing that irks them, the thing that they don't like. So then why do you want to have it? If you don't want to have it, then just don't have it anymore. So I don't understand why they're going together.
Speaker 1:So you have nothing in your life that, for no other reason than the fact that you don't like it, just continues to be irksome to you?
Speaker 2:No, no of course, of course I do, but the I I would be remiss if I didn't mention that this phrase and idea in general, I find annoying.
Speaker 1:You're thinking about, you're thinking about the word pet in terms of a cat or a dog, whereas pet can also, can also, in this case especially mean, you know, mean to say something that you, that you hold, you hold close to you, that you hold, yes, you know, you know, maybe not dear, but you know, we have this, this thing in society, where we like being upset. We do, we like being upset, and so, by that definition, if I have a, if I have a pet, if I have a pet thing I'm upset about, yeah, that tracks, yeah, I think that's where that comes from we're all better if we have less of those, however, okay.
Speaker 2:So I guess, if I had to have uh, if I have to say this pet peeve, if one of them would be individuals, especially if you're going out to eat, if you're dining out, if you're spending your hard-earned money and time to go enjoy an experience at a restaurant with family and friends, people that you hold dear, and you notice things that are happening that are suboptimal in the areas of sanitation or hygiene, or they're just the food is being handled and served by people that are just oblivious to some of the more basic practices that would and should be allowed or should be adhered to in those environments.
Speaker 2:If people sneezing and coughing inappropriately and not covering, or they just got done cleaning a table with a rag and a spray bottle and now they're going to go directly and go grab your food without washing their hands, or people that are oblivious to the amount of times and the areas on their, their own face that they they choose to touch and and and they're. They adjust their hair and then they handle money when people are are paying and then they go right back to deliver the next order. You know, just basic stuff, right? The coming in contact with things that are not clean and not sanitary and then deciding hey, okay, these things, right here, they're available now to go and bring me the, the food or the drinks that I've ordered.
Speaker 1:No, I I find that terribly so let me ask you this does this, does this, is this bothering you enough to where? This is something that you're constantly looking for, like when you go to a restaurant, are you immediately like what are they?
Speaker 2:I think my awareness goes up and is increased. My sensitivity to it is is that a? Is it an all-time high? When the, I guess the level of the establishment lowers right. If it's fast food, if it's fast casual, if it's just someplace you're picking up a coffee or something like that, then I'm more aware of it. But if it's more of a sit down, let's experience this as the experience that it's intended to be, where you're going to sit down, you're going to enjoy a meal, you're going to enjoy some beverages, you're going to enjoy your time there. I still notice, but I don't expect to notice those things as much. I know. A few years ago I took a culinary arts class that and the focus of this particular course was food, sanitation and hygiene.
Speaker 2:And after taking that class and learning that, you're hypersensitive yes, yes, and I know when I go over it's so it bugs me more when I go over to dinner parties or gatherings a family and friends and I, I see someone attempting to host, attempting to to, to invite people and serve people, but then they're also breaking a Cardinal rule and I'm just like what is happening? Like can I eat that? Can I, can I trust this? I'm going to get sick. Will they be upset if I, if I turn them down?
Speaker 2:Because I've been in line at coffee shops before and have observed the people serving and notice something egregious and go oh, you know what, I don't need coffee, that this bad. Right now I can, I can wait, I don't have. Go, oh, you know what, I don't need coffee, that that this bad. Right now I can, I can wait, I don't have to. You know this guy's rubbing his nose, accepting money, putting his hands through his hair and then turning behind him and grabbing a cup and a lid and covering, covering it and, uh, you know what? No, not from him that's not not now.
Speaker 1:that's funny because I could never be in food service because I'm very touchy, I'm very twitchy. But it's also funny that I've taken food safety courses as well for supermarket management, and so I have a tendency to notice these things as well. I'm just not as germaphobic as you. I guess it's funny. It's also funny to me that you are more critical of the lower rent environments where the training culture is obviously going to be considerably less stringent and suboptimal. So you're going to a fancy steakhouse and you're not shadowing the employees, but you're to, you're going to burger king and you're like what are they doing back there?
Speaker 2:no, it's not. So just just to clarify, I'm holding both establishments to the same standard. It's just because of the expectation that this fine dining establishment knows what to do, and they will. They will go through, they will take the steps to make sure that they provide you a sanitary, safe and healthy meal to eat, as opposed to their counterparts that provide something fast and less expensive and all those things. If I just put my blinders on and walked in there, I mean I don't. I don't know what would happen. Probably nothing in the end, and it's probably happened numerous times before without me noticing. But for whatever reason, definitely after taking that course, I think, learning how food should be handled, treated, stored and otherwise I, I am hypersensitive to everyone.
Speaker 1:I think that your belief that a place based on the scale or value of the food service naturally means that they're more food safety conscious is rather presumptuous.
Speaker 2:Well, it is, yes, correct, but the establishments that charge more for their, their food and their service usually put more training to their staff. That and and more, think that, more regular training, I mean that usually happens. How do you know that? Well, well, I've worked in restaurants. Pizza place, yeah, yeah, no, it's a brilliant no, I think.
Speaker 1:I think that what you're seeing is in lower rent places you can see more of the activities surrounding the preparation of food, and in the higher end places, those things, those, those backdoor things are behind those walls. Perhaps you might be right and those are the ones, like in the movie Waiting, where they're okie-blowing into your steak to give you a little extra sauce because you complained about the ice chips in your water.
Speaker 2:Perhaps you might be right, but wherever I observe some sort of cardinal sin when it comes to food handling and sanitation, it bothers me nonetheless.
Speaker 1:I would have a tendency to agree. Um, so, since we're talking about, since we're talking about restauranting and food service and stuff, and this is where this is where I thought you were going with. This is when you you know, talking about you and I like to go to nice restaurants. We do, we have, uh, we have had, we've had several brilliant, um, high dining experiences over the years and and uh, one of the things that I think detracts a lot from that experience is when people, especially when you get to like a really fancy spots, you're having a, you're having a hundred dollar bottle of wine and you're you're ordering a fifty six ounce cut of steak. You know all the sides are separate and extra and all this stuff, and then you're and everything's quiet. The music you could barely hear it. It's got a little bit, a little bit of light jazz cover music from from like like 40 standards up in the corner beyond it is dark and muted.
Speaker 1:You know, the waiter is kind of off in the shadows somewhere and just you don't even really notice that he's making sure that everything's okay. And then you've got this family over here, two tables over with a uh, with a toddler just screaming their fucking head off oh, this happened just the last trip to san francisco this is what I thought you were bringing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the the table, yes, the table. Behind us there was a family with a newborn and when we got to our table, newborn was crying, screaming their bloody head off and then, shortly after that, the baby stopped. But then there was a large party of what I presume to be single women girls night out, oh yeah, and shots are just coming to the table. They're taking photographs of hey, let's, let's get our shot here. Let's take, let's take pictures of this. And and no, we didn't do it right. All right, glasses up again, ladies, come on. No, look multiple times. Next shot comes out same thing. We got to do it over because this is a different shot. We need to take photos of this. And they're just getting so loud and they're inebriated, obviously, and alcohol is taking over. And they're talking this loud trying to talk to the waiter who's standing right here. They can hear them perfectly fine.
Speaker 1:And what kind of vodkas do you have?
Speaker 2:You know, things bother me to a certain point, until I remind myself of what I can and cannot control. And so then, once I just took a couple deep breaths and you know what they're enjoying themselves. The baby, finally, you know, quite you know, fell asleep or something. I couldn't hear the the child anymore. And those women, I just kind of was watching them. They were incredibly entertaining and oblivious to all of their surroundings and didn't notice the environment they, they that they were in, or how nice of establishment it was, or how that couple over there probably saved all year to come out for their anniversary.
Speaker 2:And you are just just treating treating this environment like it's your kitchen at home yeah, that's an interesting point.
Speaker 1:I didn't really think about it. I mean, well, I have thought about it and that in terms, because you know, we are our most reckless when we go to reno, we are, and we go to the roxy at the el dorado, which is a very nice place, and we have been rather obnoxious and loud at times yes, I've noticed yeah, and and, and I have taken note, uh, of people who get see.
Speaker 1:You know, we had with large table because this is a big group and they get these people who are in the room but they're kind of in the in the two seat tables around the corners and they're the people who are just totally having their evening, just obliterated by our, just our total they're on a date night, they save their money, they got sitters, they're you know, they're trying to connect and have an occasion that they can have a fond memory of.
Speaker 2:And if, if I am a participant or if I notice somebody else being a participant in and overshadowing that, you know I I try not to I probably have at some point or another. Uh, you know when the circumstances are, you know when they were a perfect storm of of family or friends and just a thoroughly enjoyable occasion, and when everybody kind of gets wrapped up in this, in this emotion and just this moment. I probably have disturbed people around me at times. I try not to, and I might not always be aware or self-aware enough in the moment, but reflecting over the years, yeah, I probably, I probably have. I probably somebody has probably heard me talk too loudly or say something that they didn't appreciate in that moment where they're trying to have a conversation with their significant other.
Speaker 1:It's a really good point to bring up, and I'm glad that this is turning into this conversation, because I just sat here for 22 minutes and ranted about how we live in a society and we need to work together in order to navigate the society, and then we, we finally went into talking about how we have definitely been that guy and like, and so you know, for every, for every pet peeve that people have, they have to stop and think what am I doing? That is, is giving a pet peeve, thank you to somebody else. What? What am I doing? That is giving a pet peeve, thank you to somebody else. What are we doing?
Speaker 1:And these situations where people are trying to do like you said, trying to create a very specific memory Not everybody is going out to crazy fancy restaurants now all the time is going out to crazy fancy restaurants now all the time. And you're right, you might have somebody who did save up to go on an anniversary dinner or or to or to have that special date where they would tell somebody they love them or maybe even propose, or you know, you know they're taking, taking mother out, you know, you know, or grandma, or, and they're going out and they have this idea in their head of this perfect evening, this lovely quiet, nice wine, nice food, a good conversation, just all these checkboxes that need to be marked for it to be perfect. And then there's me and futsy yelling at each other across the table, at the top of our lungs, because we're too drunk to realize that we're being that guy.
Speaker 2:No, yeah, it takes. It takes some, some. You need to be self-aware, you need to have need to have taken inventory of your behavior and have opportunity to reflect and and then, once you can, hindsight is, you know, 2020, as as they say it's the only time I've ever had 2020 and and when you assess, then you can you, when you know better, you can do better. Yeah, and but sometimes you, you put yourself in a situation where you don't allow yourself to.
Speaker 1:So here's the deal, and I'm not trying to absolve my behavior at the Roxy. However, the people who are actively cutting me off in line when I go to commute in the morning, they're not drunk.
Speaker 1:How do you know? That's a good point Because they didn't hit the. That's a good point because they didn't hit the. It's a good point, although, although just like with just like with your belief that a higher-end restaurant is is more sanitary, which is total hearsay, but you have but you have some circumstantial evidence to back up your point. I also believe those fuckers to be sober and actively making the decision to ruin my community.
Speaker 2:And you make a good point. I think I need to up the level of establishments I choose to visit Now Michelin star or better, only.
Speaker 1:Only, oh gosh, you're such a pretentious fuck. I've never been to a Michelin star restaurant. Why haven't we? Why haven't we? Are there any? Yeah there's plenty. What is the? What is the farthest we would have to travel to?
Speaker 2:uh, san jose, uh, san francisco bay area from here bay area? Yes, there's, there's at least one or two in san francisco, um, probably more how?
Speaker 1:do you spell michelin like the tire?
Speaker 2:yeah, how you spell Michelin Like the tire.
Speaker 1:Yeah, how do you spell the tire?
Speaker 2:Oh, you're asking a dyslexic person to spell.
Speaker 1:Michelin, and I'm a writer so I can't spell. Oh gosh, I'll just let ChatGPT tell me what is the closest Michelin star.
Speaker 2:I know the French. La french laundry is one that I've always wanted to visit. Did french laundry come up on your list?
Speaker 1:no. So I asked what the closest one was okay to our, to our city, and the closest one is the Kitchen in Sacramento.
Speaker 2:Oh, I didn't realize. When did they get?
Speaker 1:their Michelin star. This specific restaurant holds one Michelin star and offers a seasonal.
Speaker 2:I'm aware of that restaurant.
Speaker 1:P-R-I-X-F-I-X-E Prefix, prefix, prefix.
Speaker 2:Okay, let's see here it's basically you go to the restaurant and if you like the menu then that's what they serve you. That's the only uh dinner offering that will be available.
Speaker 1:You pay, they bring you oh, so it's a set menu it is prefix uh, no, no, no june of 2019, they officially received their michelin star for the first time.
Speaker 2:I I knew they were a fine dining establishment. I've been wanting to go for years. I try to get reservations. Did you tell them who you are, maybe about a decade ago? No, I did not Fucked up. I might not have been in a position to have that. I didn't have as much clout then. You still don't Calm down.
Speaker 1:So, yeah, their reservations at the time that I looked were three, four, five months out. That's pretty, yeah. So you've got to and that was pre-Michelin. Star, you've got to plan your vacation.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, Plan my vacation to Sacramento, California.
Speaker 1:I mean, if you want to go to the closest Michelin star, all right.
Speaker 2:We can go to.
Speaker 1:Dave and Buster's after Really hit both ends of the scale. We are not doing that. Yes, we are In.
Speaker 2:one day Sounds like a really good idea, because we can't. Yeah, all right. Okay, let's look into it. Yeah, I'll get on an open table.
Speaker 1:See what I can't do, and if they're really close together, that's almost like serendipity telling us that it has to happen.
Speaker 2:I've always wanted to go to the kitchen.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I've always wanted to go to Dave Buster's.
Speaker 2:Says nobody ever, except for the person sitting across from me.
Speaker 1:I love ticket arcade games. I love video games. You've never been to Dave Buster's. I've never have. I don't like going out in a place that's going to promote drinking and being away from home.
Speaker 2:I used to teach a class at Dave and Buster's. I would take students there and we would fill salt and pepper shakers and wrap up all of their flatware and clean their arcade games. Yeah, I've been there several times. And then that particular Dave and Buster's would invite us back and they would just give us cards and go hey, you have an unlimited play 10 miles. You're stuck on this. Oh my, all right. All right, I'm in, I'm in, sign me up. We're going to the kitchen. We're going to Dave and Buster's in one day.
Speaker 1:In the same evening. It's going to be so good.
Speaker 2:Okay, the trick is we have to go to the kitchen first, of course. Okay, all right, I just want that.
Speaker 1:No, let's go to Dave and Buster's and get sauced on cheap beer and video games.
Speaker 2:As long as we agree, there's an order that you should accept these things?
Speaker 1:Yes, no, I would rather ruin somebody's date night at Dave and Buster's. You're that guy.
Speaker 2:I'm that guy. This is good.
Speaker 1:I have some real soul searching to do to find out just how mad I should be about commuter asshats. Am I the restaurant asshole?
Speaker 2:Maybe Fuck, we probably are all that guy.
Speaker 1:Somewhere.
Speaker 2:Somewhere in time and space?
Speaker 1:Yes, we live in society. I mean, we can't. If you're trying to, if you're trying to and this is if you try to please everybody all the time you're trying to live that perfect participation trophy life where you're not offending nobody, I don't care what generation you're in. It's not possible. However, you can have a little bit of wherewithal.
Speaker 2:Sure, yeah, choose to do it anyway if you know what the consequences and ramifications of those decisions and actions are and you're making a choice, I I almost am more okay with that as opposed to somebody that's just oblivious because we have so much information now, like people should know more than they do that's funny.
Speaker 1:I'm situate situationally. I'm more apt to feel like somebody who's having a great time or doing something and they don't realize how they're affecting the people around them. I can give them a pass. Somebody who's actively being an asshole Fuck that guy.
Speaker 2:But in your opinion? In your opinion, they're doing something that you dislike. If they're making a conscious choice.
Speaker 1:It's all opinion-based. It totally is, and I have lived a long time and I survived.
Speaker 2:I think I have more respect for the people that are informed If they're informed.
Speaker 1:So you'd rather have? I don't know.
Speaker 2:I'm thinking out loud here.
Speaker 1:No good, no, this is spitballist. You'd rather have two choices. You've got me and Fetzy yelling at each other across the table, not realizing how loud and obnoxious we are being. Or you have this guy over here who's being loud and boisterous and when someone says, hey, dude, there's people around and he says I don't give a fuck.
Speaker 2:Which people around and he says I'm gonna fuck which. Okay, so maybe I know I'm being loud, no fuck, maybe it's possible that it can change based on the environment, because if somebody it is habitually cutting people off and making last minute lane changes and trying to get in where they should have tried to get in much earlier. In that line, so to speak If they're doing this repeatedly, if they're practicing this Chronic assets.
Speaker 2:If they're a competent driver but they're driving in a manner that's still relatively competent and safe, but it's irking the other people around them. Other people dislike their habits. As opposed to somebody that's just like I'm gonna go I didn't check my, they didn't check their mirror, they didn't see that you were there that I would rather drive around the person that's doing this on purpose, because at least they're they are aware of what they're doing and who's around them and what space they can and cannot fit their car, and as opposed to somebody who's just like, oh well okay, all right so.
Speaker 2:I guess that changes things. But in your situation, yeah, and I experienced this bowling. I was bowling one day and I don't bowl. I don't bowl because I have small wrists and it hurts my wrists and I don't do it often. I do enjoy it when I go, but I usually like to go with my kids or something like that. Anyway, I was bowling, I was actually with my wife and kids and I didn't understand the etiquette.
Speaker 1:I didn't understand. Bowlers hates non-bowlers.
Speaker 2:Yes, gentleman in the lane next to me, he was on his approach. He was was getting ready and you jumped up and just went bold, and he, much, much larger gentleman than I, much taller, got in my space, yeah, in an intimidating fashion, looking down at me what are you doing? And I didn't know how to respond. I didn't know what I did or didn't do. I didn't know. I was like, uh, I'm not sure, uh, he's when? So then he proceeded to explain and then I got it. It didn't make him any less mad, except for the fact that, okay, this guy didn't know, and that's why maybe he could let it go a little bit faster. So I suppose my perspective and opinion could change based on what it is we're talking about who I would respect more, who I would choose to give the benefit of the doubt to? I'm not sure, yeah so.
Speaker 1:So the correct response to your bullying guy I mean for next time is calm down, pal. It's not league night, that's the. That's the correct response to forget that shit. They've got leagues, oh yeah, um. For the other thing, it sounds like you are more comfortable with somebody who is practiced in being an asshole on the road than you are with somebody who is stressed out and trying to do something for the first time.
Speaker 2:Right now, yes, yeah.
Speaker 1:When we come back next episode. I think we're going to do a slight variation on this topic, because Psyche doesn't have pet peeves. I got an idea. I got an idea.
Speaker 2:I've got some I mean, so I disagree with the title. I don't like the title, but that doesn't mean I don't understand the premise.
Speaker 1:So if I come up with a synonym for pet peeves, you'd have been more okay with it.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:That's a pet peeve.
Speaker 2:I have things I can dislike and I can discuss.
Speaker 1:People who only understand something if you say it in a specific way, even though there's a hundred different ways to say it, and they all mean the same thing. I didn't say.
Speaker 2:I didn't understand it. I said I didn't like it. Yeah, but you understand what I'm saying, do you understand?
Speaker 1:the words that are coming out of my mouth. It's if you say something that is defined the exact same way by using a different string of words, but it's the same thing. Calm down. It's hella dumb, All right, All right. Next time more pet peeves Starting with that one.
Speaker 2:I just don't like saying pet peeve, then don't fucking say it. I don't even like hearing it?
Speaker 1:Nope, I'm going to ask Chad to repeat it. Pet peeve. Then don't fucking say it. I don't even like hearing it. I'm gonna chat, gpt, chat, gpt, right now.
