Why Smart Women Podcast
Welcome to the Why Smart Women Podcast, hosted by Annie McCubbin. We explore why women sometimes make the wrong choices and offer insightful guidance for better, informed decisions. Through engaging discussions, interviews, and real-life stories, we empower women to harness their intelligence, question their instincts, and navigate life's complexities with confidence. Join us each week to uncover the secrets of smarter decision-making and celebrate the brilliance of women everywhere.
Why Smart Women Podcast
Bonus Ep: Annie, David and the Chicken Fence
What's the secret to staying happily married for over three decades? According to Annie McCubbin and her husband David, it's certainly not perfection. In this refreshingly honest bonus episode, they pull back the curtain on their 30+ year relationship to reveal what actually keeps couples together when life gets messy.
Join Annie and her husband David for a more relaxed, behind-the-scenes chat. It’s the stuff that doesn’t always make it into the main pod — candid convos, sharp takes, a few laughs, and plenty of honest thinking. Think less structured, more real. If you enjoy the main show, you’ll love hearing these two bounce off each other in a more personal, unfiltered way.
🙋♀️ Meet with Annie - go.oncehub.com/AnnieMcCubbin
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Is that because you were a pig, you were the bacon? I'm not a squirrel.
Speaker 2:You're a squirrel. You're like what was that? Oh, look over here there's a nut. Anyway, you are listening to the why Smart Women podcast, the podcast that helps smart women work out why we repeatedly make the wrong decisions and how to make better ones. From relationships, career choices, finances, to faux fur jackets and kale smoothies. Every moment of every day, we're making decisions. Let's make them good ones.
Speaker 2:I'm your host, annie McCubbin, and, as a woman of a certain age, I've made my own share of really bad decisions. Not my husband, I don't mean him, though I did go through some shockers to find him, and I wish this podcast had been around to save me from myself. This podcast will give you insights into the working of your own brain, which will blow your mind. I acknowledge the traditional owners of the land on which I'm recording and you are listening on this day. Always was, always will be, aboriginal land. Well, hello, smart women, and welcome to our very first bonus episode. Actually, it's my very first bonus episode for the why Smart Women podcast, but in these episodes, I'm going to be joined by my husband, david, and we're going to be talking about relationship dynamics, aren't we? Is that what we're going to be talking about?
Speaker 1:If it's your podcast, you can talk about whatever you want.
Speaker 2:Well, I think that we have been together for how long?
Speaker 1:Took over 30 years.
Speaker 2:Yep, that's a long time, it's quite a while. And lately we've been socialising with quite a lot of people who haven't made it. No failure in that, definitely no failure in that.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I am not a supporter of staying in a relationship for the sake of the children or any such thing, and so many relationships around us have not had longevity.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah. So what do you think that we're kind of qualified to?
Speaker 2:Well, I think we're an anomaly.
Speaker 1:We're an anomaly.
Speaker 2:We are an anomaly yeah, not an anemone, something a sea creature.
Speaker 1:Yes, we're not an anemone, we're not an enema. We're not an enema. I creature.
Speaker 2:Yes, we're not an enemy, we're not an enema. We're not an enema, an anomaly. I've already said it. Now you're just confusing it.
Speaker 1:We are an anomaly.
Speaker 2:We are an anomaly because we have been together for 32 years, really I think so, or 33.
Speaker 1:Or 33.
Speaker 2:Anyway, and not only have we been together, but during that we have spent a lot of time working together either in the theatre, in plays together, or in our business, in our consulting business. So we've had a lot of contact, haven't we? And a lot of areas that have been, that would make themselves available to have conflict, wouldn't you say?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We've been under pressure and we've had to rely on each other when we have been under pressure, and some things have gone spectacularly well and others haven't. What do you reckon are the moments that are most testing in a relationship like ours?
Speaker 2:So I think the biggest test of a relationship.
Speaker 1:I know I've got it in my head. You give your version first is when children are born. Ok.
Speaker 2:Really Well, what Duh.
Speaker 1:Well, I mean, it certainly puts both of us under a lot of pressure, but my experience of that was that in every moment we pull together.
Speaker 2:I'm not saying we didn't pull together. I'm saying that, children, you know this idea that people aren't doing so well, and so they think, oh, I know what we'll do.
Speaker 2:I'll have a couple of kids, that's like a baby and of course, children are an incredible strain on a relationship. Nothing to do with how much you love them or how well you do, but I was of a certain age when we had a child, our first child, and you know, they do know that high-achieving women which I would put myself in that area older high-achieving women are most likely, I think, to develop postnatal depression. I did not develop postnatal depression, but it was a big. The second child was a big shock to my system, but then again I was sick.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 2:I got really sick. So I just think that if you are the sort of person where order is important to you order and routine then a baby throws that out.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:And it always makes me laugh when people go oh, I've met this guy and it was just like amazing. And you know, we sat up till four o'clock in the morning and we just got so much in common and we just talked and he's like amazing, it was really amazing and I'm like it doesn't count until it's three o'clock in the morning and everybody's tired and you've run out of formula or nappies, that's yeah that's when you know the measure of the person that you're with, not if you can sit up to four o'clock in the morning talking philosophically, in my opinion, about star signs and whatever you're talking about.
Speaker 2:Whatever you're talking about, like it's people's. The true measure of people, I think, only really is shown when they're under pressure. We're all nice when everything's fine aren't we? Yes, yes, yes, it's easy to be nice when things are cruisy.
Speaker 1:Absolutely Right. When I think about your example, I think that that was definitely a period in our life, both of those periods in our life where Both two children, two children Clearly, clearly your role in that was far more. Bigger, bigger. Yeah, it's like. What do they say? The difference between eggs and bacon? What Eggs and bacon? What Eggs and bacon provide a wonderful antithesis, because when it comes to eggs and bacon, the chicken is on board.
Speaker 2:What in God's name are you talking about? How did we get to exit?
Speaker 1:Hurry up. I'm saying you know I'm the chicken, because I was involved.
Speaker 2:And I'm the bacon, the bacon, because the pig is absolutely committed what.
Speaker 1:You know what I'm saying. No Eggs and bacon. The chicken just lays an egg, the pig becomes the bacon. No, and bacon, what's he? The chicken just lays an egg, the pig becomes the bacon.
Speaker 2:No, no, oh, because I had to die.
Speaker 1:No, you didn't have to die, I'm just saying that the pig did. The pig has to die. So the pig is more than just sort of committed.
Speaker 2:I've just got to say that of metaphors that I have heard.
Speaker 1:That's a terrible use of that metaphor.
Speaker 2:Metaphors that I have heard that would sort of exemplify two people's input into a relation, into parenting. I'm not Eggs and bacon isn't the first one that comes to mind, but anyway.
Speaker 1:But you get the idea. Not, really no no, I'm acknowledging that the whole process. I was At worst, I was a bystander. You know all the way through it, all of the things that were going on with your body giving birth, breastfeeding, all of that stuff.
Speaker 2:Also the caring of the children.
Speaker 1:Well, I mean, that's where I could help, you know, yeah, but I think, men and women, I could get up and do things and you did and you were really good, you did get up.
Speaker 2:I think he did. You did and you were really good, you did get up, I think he did. He always got up and was never a bystander in that regard at all. You were very, very engaged and I remember when we had Lachlan, you were sleeping on the floor of the hospital until they told you to go home, so you certainly have never been disengaged. Where I think it's different, though, is that for women and anybody out there who has Is your bike going to get wet, your electric bike?
Speaker 1:in the rain. No, it's fine, it's got the cover on it.
Speaker 2:Oh my God, David. Anyway, it was very expensive. It's the second one.
Speaker 1:You are so distractible.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but.
Speaker 1:Well, I'm the one with the ADHD diagnosis.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I know, but that's because I'm tangential in my thinking. Now I'm also highly habitualised. How much of a habit am I? Yeah, tremendously, see, I am not ADHD, because I'm very habitualised.
Speaker 1:What I'm not habitualised.
Speaker 2:What You're not habitualised. What do you mean?
Speaker 1:I don't know that. That's the litmus test. Is that because you're a pig, you're with the bacon? I'm not a squirrel.
Speaker 2:You're a squirrel. You're like what was that? Oh, look over here there's a nut.
Speaker 1:Anyway.
Speaker 2:What Anyway Shh? I want to get back to this.
Speaker 1:Yeah, okay.
Speaker 2:Right, I want to get back to this. Yeah, okay, right is what we're talking about the children thing, right.
Speaker 1:So with the children thing, hang on this was under the theme of things that test the relationship yes, you know. Periods in our life where the relationship was tested. Oh, I know what it was. I know what it was.
Speaker 2:I know what it was. Here's the thing Is that for women and anybody who's listening to this, I think, will attest to this Once you have had a child, your brain has apportioned a bit of it that is always focused on the children and it never goes away, like even now. My children are older and they're still a part of my brain that's still engaged with how they are and what they're doing. And I don't think it's the same for men, and I'll tell you why I don't think it's the same for men is I can distinctly remember so we did a lot of travel in the early days of our children being young.
Speaker 2:We did a lot of travelling around Australia and, of course, to leave two children in Sydney while we went off to Melbourne or whatever took an enormous amount of organisation. Yes, where are they going to sleep? Who's going to pick them up? Have they got the right food? Have they had their bag packed? Is their sports um uniform clean? And that was also with lily, who would do a sport for like 23 seconds because she liked the uniform and I'd buy it and then she'd wear it and then she didn't like it anymore anyway, apart from that. So my brain was always other than mine. I distinctly remember arriving in Melbourne one trip and saying to you do you know where the children are? And you didn't know where I'd put them and who was minding them.
Speaker 1:You'd probably hidden them somewhere just to catch me out.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'd hidden them in the cellar, yeah.
Speaker 1:How was I supposed to know that?
Speaker 2:You didn't and I said do you know where the children children are? And it had taken me hours and days of prep and actually your brain was elsewhere, doing other things that I'm crap at booking airline tickets and organizing hotels.
Speaker 2:And that's exactly organizing course materials yeah, and also, um, doing the proposals in the first place, because I was always terrible at it. So in that I was I'm no good at that. Look, come on, I'm no good at that. Come on, I'm no good at it. Anyway, in that regard, I think we have managed to do it, because we diversify and our strengths are quite separate, but complementary, would you say.
Speaker 1:I would say that I would say that. And look, the period of the children yeah, joining us and those early years, I wouldn't rank that as a time where our relationship was under stress. I mean, as individuals we were under stress, but I actually think that those stresses brought us closer together. You know, I thought that we did as you say. We brought our complementary. You know skills and talents and you know just presence. You know, if I'd had a good night's sleep the night before then I'd be up and vice versa.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And the reason why I Well, you're not gendered or sexist.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:So that's the good thing, that's one of your very good qualities.
Speaker 1:Yes, well, you know to the degree to which that's true, but, look, I think the reason why even though that probably was the period those were the periods in our life when we were under the most amount of stress and pressure looking after things that were incredibly important was that we didn't keep score. It wasn't a question of I've done all of this and therefore you have to do that because of the score I think both of us.
Speaker 2:But I think that has been an ongoing thing. I think we don't keep score.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so I think that's handy.
Speaker 2:That's right, I don't want everyone to think that we're pretending that we are perfect, because we're certainly not. We're certainly not. But I think we were just lucky, because we've discussed this before. You meet someone, what do you know? What do you know about them? You don't know a damn thing. It's just luck, right?
Speaker 1:That's right.
Speaker 2:You can make some evaluation. Are they stable in their mood, right?
Speaker 1:Do they work hard? Do they have a sense of?
Speaker 2:humour. Are they consistent? Are they consistent? Are they generous? Are they kind? Generous and kind you can make these assessments about somebody you know. I could never have been with someone that didn't work or that was sort of you know, feckless or special.
Speaker 1:I could never have tolerated that. I could never be with someone who was rude to people in the service industry.
Speaker 2:No, that's right. Like waiters and taxi drivers You're meant to say, then you could never have been with somebody who didn't work either, because I've worked hard. Go on, say that now.
Speaker 1:Could never have been with somebody who didn't have a really strong work. Ethic, ethic, and everything that they did was extremely effective and created progress every time they went to work.
Speaker 2:Did you just make that up now?
Speaker 1:Did you just make that up? Well, you know, give me a break. You told me I had to say something.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but you were quite specific then it was good, I am good.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I know you're fabulous, Okay, but this is the point when everything's good, when everything is fabulous, then it's easy to show up and be doing the right things. It's when you are under pressure. If you can still show up and do the right things, then there's something that's good with the relationship. So I didn't think that those periods stressed our relationship as much as other things actually did do stress Well so, times in our lives when I have been influenced strongly by someone outside the relationship, and so I'm thinking about a business advisor that I met on an aeroplane once.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 1:Who, you know, seduced the guts out of me.
Speaker 2:Okay, let's just be clear about what you mean by seduced. We're not talking about romantic seduction.
Speaker 1:No, but he inflated my sense of what we were capable of doing in the business you know. Promised vast amounts of capital so that we could grow.
Speaker 2:And of course We've already covered this on the other episode.
Speaker 1:I know we did but I mean, this was the thing, the part of the relationship, the thing that really stressed our relationship was that I was prepared to give him the benefit of the doubt, and you Were not because he was a dick. Yeah, he revealed himself to be that he revealed himself to be a dick.
Speaker 2:So yeah, I wasn't and I think, yeah, that's sort of when there is a differing of opinion on the motivator of someone. Yeah, yeah, I think that's probably caused the stress. Also, there was the woman that came along and told you that she had cancer. Oh my God.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:And she only had David had gone out with her. What? When you were in your 20s? Oh, no, no, because you're very kind.
Speaker 1:I was Actually, I was only 18.
Speaker 2:When you went out with her.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah yeah, and we had a relationship for about three months or so and then I left cities and it wasn't even a very long relationship it wasn't a very, very long relationship, but you know, I sort of went off to go to acting school in another city and I felt bad about the fact that I just left.
Speaker 2:You do have that thing where you feel responsible for other people's feelings, don't you?
Speaker 1:Yes, and you know, it's a two-edged sword.
Speaker 2:It's a very nice quality, but it is a two-edged sword, because some people are horrible.
Speaker 1:Some people are and will take advantage of you. And I think these are the areas where our relationship has come under pressure, under stress, and I do think that it's a fairly common one when two people have very different evaluations of people outside the relationship.
Speaker 2:But I was right both times.
Speaker 1:You were right both times.
Speaker 2:I was in fact, yeah, the evaluation, the conclusion of it was with both of those instances I was right, because the woman that had come back into our lives and told David that she had 18 months to live, and that's like 15 years ago and she appears to be still going, doesn't she? So that was a bit of a she's still going man. Man, she was. She really laid it on thick too. I mean she was the proper scammy thing, wasn she? Was she really laid it on thick too? I mean she was the proper scammy thing, wasn't she? She'd shaved her head and had a cupboard full of pills and had David pushing her around in a wheelchair. Remember, she was the pits, and initially I was.
Speaker 1:I mean, it could be that she's actually a miraculous survivor.
Speaker 2:Oh bullshit, she's such a liar. Anyway, she swanned back into our lives and then, after about I don't know.
Speaker 2:It was a few months when she was. That was when our children were smaller and I think what happened was she had come into our lives and she was making demands on David. And then I began to think I think you're a liar, I think you're making this up. And she was making demands on David. And then I began to think I think you're a liar, I think you're making this up. And she was still making demands on David and in my from where I stood, the resources that David had that I required and also our children required to some degree, were being siphoned off by her, and I didn't like it.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:But, and then it transpired that she was telling big fat lies and it was, I think, something to do with your Christian upbringing too, wasn't it that you're very the kindness and the sort of compassion?
Speaker 1:yeah, doing the right thing by people okay, and so I guess you know, maybe, maybe, maybe there's another thing that puts relationships under stress, because I mean, yeah, yeah, yeah, I was certainly operating out of a value set that was laid down fairly early on by my upbringing in the Methodist church. We actually were doing a job with Wesley Mission at the time, that's right. And so I'd walk into the foyer and there was the big quote, the John Wesley quote, and that is that you should do as much as you can. No do is do as much good as you can for as many people as you can for as long as you can and and and.
Speaker 1:I thought, yeah, I should try and do something good for this person who is terminally ill, who you know. Once I had feelings for uh and and um, yeah, so, um, it was a value set now yeah, it was.
Speaker 2:It was a value set and interesting. I think it's interesting to look at that notion of, uh, compassion, empathy, doing good in the community and whether or not you require religiosity because there's a there's a very commonly held belief that the religious are more likely to be community-minded, helpful, kind, generous, compassionate than, uh, the irreligious or the atheists and I am clearly a raging atheist, raging, raging atheist and the data shows very clearly that it is not true, that being religious does not predispose you to being any kinder.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 2:In fact, often in those very religious communities it's quite. It's full of abuse and all sorts of awful things. I'm not saying that was, but I think it's good to just get some of these precepts out and go. Is it true that if you're religious you're more likely to be compassionate? And you're not? Because I'm a good example of that, because I'm nice.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:You know, I've had things happen to people in my life and I've been pretty helpful and I'm an atheist, so I'm not relying on the afterlife.
Speaker 1:That's anecdotal, though you know You're my anecdote. I did hear something from a uh, a leading anthropologist.
Speaker 2:I can't, I can't actually remember that we're going to have to remember because we're going to have to put it in the show notes now.
Speaker 1:You've mentioned okay, well, I'll try, and I'll try and find it, but it was. It was the question around um, you know when did civilization begin? You know when did, when did civilization stroke community actually start? Know, according to the fossil record.
Speaker 2:Is this going to be interesting or boring?
Speaker 1:Well, you tell me, and this person's answer was it was this period when they found a fossilized bone, a bone that had actually recovered, and it was a big bone. It was like the femur, like a big thigh bone, and the thigh bone had recovered. Now, if we were not community-minded, if we didn't have compassion and care as a species, then that individual would have died. You know, if you've got a broken bone, you can't forage for food, you can't hunt for food.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. So there was tribe. The tribal brain kicked in.
Speaker 1:And so the fact that this bone had recovered, that it had re-knitted, that it had healed, meant that someone was looking after that person, and that was a very particular time in human history, in human prehistory, well before the Catholic Church or Judaism or, you know, spiritual gurus or any of that sort of stuff. It was just a human instinct to care.
Speaker 2:I'm so got distracted because your bottom teeth are really straight.
Speaker 1:Okay, I don't know, does that have anything to do with anything at all?
Speaker 2:No, but I just wanted to say that.
Speaker 1:All right.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's good, they look good. I don't often get that close to your teeth, you know, like in this while you're talking. Your teeth are really straight this is the first time you've noticed this in 30 years well, no, no, I just didn't spend a lot of time thinking about it, but now I am. They're very good and very straight so focused danny yeah, it's not adhd though you are such, you are a squirrel I'm a squirrel, but let's look at the difference between someone who has a brain like mine, Okay, Okay who goes all over the shop, but I am not ADHD, Okay so here's another dynamic that could create stresses in relationship.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:And that is literally. Well, no, I'm saying neurodiversity. Oh yeah, you know different minds, minds that think differently, that evaluate differently.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh yeah, for sure, for sure, for sure. You know, as we have spoken about, I have an anxious brain.
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and you have an ADHD brain.
Speaker 1:Well, that's one way of describing it.
Speaker 2:Well, go on Well. I'm just that's the most easy way to understand it Is Well, go on.
Speaker 1:Well, I'm just that's the most easy way to understand it. Is that its defining characteristic?
Speaker 2:No, but we're talking about diversity, aren't we?
Speaker 1:Okay, all right, no you're very smart and you know very good but I'm just saying I'm not angling for that, I'm just saying you know, it could be faulty in all sorts of ways.
Speaker 2:Your brain.
Speaker 1:Yeah, it could be.
Speaker 2:What of ways your brain, yeah, it could be what?
Speaker 1:What are you saying?
Speaker 2:Well, I'm saying, you have an anxious brain and I have an ADHD brain. Yeah, we have other things too. I'm just saying. Okay, that would be a cause, for you know you do something ADHD, and then I get anxious about it. I'm saying that would be a cause for stress on a relationship.
Speaker 1:And that doesn't really happen, does it?
Speaker 2:What? Oh my God, Where's my phone? Where's my phone Hang on.
Speaker 1:No, I don't have to do that now, it's over there.
Speaker 2:He couldn't believe it when I said to him where's the function on my Apple Watch that tells me where to find my phone, because mine is always well, 99% of the time it's next to me.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but sometimes you do it. And if you hit that there.
Speaker 2:Oh, it's so cool, isn't it? Yeah, anyway, so yeah, diversity of thinking styles, and just sorry, oh, I had one thing to say.
Speaker 1:Timing Time blindness. That's the thing that bothers you. Okay, so that's a really good example.
Speaker 2:Describe time blindness in relation to being ADHD.
Speaker 1:Oh look, you know, I've got a dozen things that have to be done precisely in a given order, each with a level of complexity, and I should have that done in about five minutes' time.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and the classics, the absolute classics, yeah, have been when we've been leaving Australia to go on a big trip, Like when you go on Australia is, you know, as we know, the Antipodes. It's a very long way away from Europe and a very, very long way from America, right?
Speaker 1:Yes.
Speaker 2:You can't, just, you know, hop on a train, or it's not a short trip, it's a long way.
Speaker 1:And you can't go back when you've forgotten something.
Speaker 2:That's right and for us to organise David, myself and two children to get on a plane to fly, for example, into Germany or something. It was a lot of organization and I have very, very clear examples of it would. 15 minutes before we had to leave for the airport, you had decided that what you had to do was build a new chook fence. And you were down there with wire Do you not remember that? With wire, and I said what are you doing?
Speaker 1:And you said Keeping the chicken safe.
Speaker 2:I've just got to build a chicken fence. Yeah, quickly. Which was something that would probably take I don't know five hours and should have been done the day before.
Speaker 1:But because of David's brain and because I do think, I'd only just noticed that there was a hole in the chook fence.
Speaker 2:Yeah. I know that we can't go abroad with people looking after them and they could have escaped. Yes, I know, but you know that you can't. Now, looking back on that, that is not a 10-minute job, it was like a three-hour job, but it had to be done. Yes, and this is time blindness. And then I looked down and he's there without a shirt on.
Speaker 1:I didn't want to get sweaty before I and I said to him what are you doing?
Speaker 2:and he said I'm just fixing the chalk fence and I said you can't do that now because we have to leave to go to the airport. And you said clearly, you remember you said I'll just be a couple of minutes. Just be a couple of minutes rolls off the tongue. I tell you, the other thing that happens is I go David, are you okay for me to serve dinner?
Speaker 1:And he goes, yeah yeah, I'll just be a couple of minutes.
Speaker 2:I'll just be a couple of minutes, anyway. So then I do whatever it requires to get the meal to the point of serving and I go. Okay, I'm about to serve and you go.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'll be a couple of minutes.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and then it's half an hour later and it's all cold, yeah, and then I go where were you? And he goes. Oh, it's just.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I had to finish something. I had to finish the thing.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the thing had to be finished the thing had, so that has caused a fair amount of stress. But then if you can just put yourself and this is such a good method, I think, for de-escalating stress is to put yourself in the shoes, in that moment, of the other person. So then I have to put myself in David's shoes and go okay, he's having to get this proposal out and I'm crap at writing them, so it's up to him and you have to go.
Speaker 1:And he's attached to me. No, no, see the attach See see.
Speaker 2:See what that's attitude.
Speaker 1:And his anxious brain is concerned that if the food isn't eaten immediately, it will lose all its nutritional value.
Speaker 2:Yeah, oh my God. So that's still a work in progress. Anyway, thank you for listening.
Speaker 1:I'll cook.
Speaker 2:Thank you for listening.
Speaker 1:I hope that was worth your time.
Speaker 2:We will continue to talk about the dynamics of relationship. What gets in the way of living a sort of harmonious life? There's no such thing, it's not going to happen. What gets in the way of living a? Purposeful enriched I don't know. Easy.
Speaker 1:It doesn't have to be enriched. I don't not easy. It's not going to be easy Enriched.
Speaker 2:It doesn't have to be enriched. I don't know.
Speaker 1:I don't mind, easy, just to have a nice day.
Speaker 2:Yeah, just to have a nice day, yeah, but we're not saying you have to be happy all the time, because it's not possible.
Speaker 1:No.
Speaker 2:We're not after happiness, we're just after living with purpose. Well, that sounds horrible. I sounded like some sort of guru. I hate those guys. Yeah, okay, I'll tell you what. Okay.
Speaker 1:Instead of making a promise around the wisdom that is going to fall from your lips as you tell your anecdotes, why don't you tell us what you want us to focus on?
Speaker 2:Because they don't really. All aspects of relationship, all aspects of critical thinking oh yeah, please, please, oh, my God, I would love it. Yep, how do they do that Well?
Speaker 1:I mean, how do they do that? You clearly have no idea.
Speaker 2:I have no idea. You have no idea, no.
Speaker 1:They could maybe send you an email, oh yeah, or a DM, or that's a message.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah. So here's the thing Harry will put. Harry, who's the little producer?
Speaker 1:he will put. He's not that little, he's bigger than you are.
Speaker 2:Everyone's bigger than me, but he's young. He's going to put in the show notes anything. If there's questions, and we will answer them, because it's all a work in the show notes. If anything, that, if there's questions, and we will answer them because, um, it's all a work in progress. Right, people, it's all a work in progress. So if we can be nice and kind to ourselves and not judge ourselves too badly when we screw up, that's a really good start. Yeah, all right. So, um, thanks for tuning in. Wherever you are in the world, we've now got listeners in india, we've got listeners in morocco, we've got a lot of listeners in america and canada and britain and sweden.
Speaker 1:So hello everybody you've got one in mongolia, don't?
Speaker 2:you I. I did it, dropped off. Why am I one Mongolian listener?
Speaker 1:Come back if you're seeing this.
Speaker 2:Yes, please come back. I need you. Yes, please listen to, like and subscribe. See you later, girls. Bye, thanks for tuning in to why?
Speaker 2:Smart Women with me, annie McCubbin, I hope today's episode has ignited your curiosity and left you feeling inspired by my anti-motivational style. Join me next time as we continue to unravel the fascinating layers of our brains and develop ways to sort out the fact from the fiction and the over 6,000 thoughts we have in the course of every day. Remember, intelligence isn't enough. You can be as smart as paint, but it's not just about what you know, it's about how you think. And in all this talk of whether or not you can trust your gut, if you ever feel unsafe, whether it's in the street, at work, car park, in a bar or in your own home, please, please, respect that gut feeling.
Speaker 2:Staying safe needs to be our primary objective. We can build better lives, but we have to stay safe to do that. And don't forget to subscribe, rate and review the podcast and share it with your fellow smart women and allies. Together, we're hopefully reshaping the narrative around women and making better decisions. So until next time, stay sharp, stay savvy and keep your critical thinking hat shiny. This is Annie McCubbin signing off from why Smart Women? See you later. This episode was produced by Harrison Hess. It was executive produced and written by me, annie McCubbin.
