Wise Women Stories

The Fourth Task - Facing The Wild Hag

• Inarra Aryane Griffyn & Edwina Murphy - Droomer • Season 1 • Episode 6

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Edwina Murphy-Droomer and Inarra Aryane Griffyn engage deeply with the tale of Vasilisa and her encounter with Baba Yaga, exploring its implications for women's empowerment and authenticity. They highlight how facing fearsome aspects of the wild woman archetype, embodied by Baba Yaga, is crucial for women reclaiming their true selves. Edwina shares initial discomfort with Baba Yaga's portrayal, reflecting society's unease with powerful, unconventional female figures.

Inarra discusses societal perceptions of powerful women through a patriarchal lens, drawing parallels between nature's wildness and women's innate power. They emphasise dreams as a tool for self-discovery, sharing personal experiences where unsettling dreams reveal deep-seated beliefs needing acknowledgment and transformation.

The conversation expands to navigating power dynamics in various settings—business, societal expectations, and personal relationships. Inarra reflects on her journey in corporate environments, initially conforming but later embracing her authentic self, tattoos and all, realising that true power lies in self-acceptance.

Together, they advocate for women to reclaim their wildness and embrace all facets of feminine power—assertiveness, boundary-setting, and authenticity. They celebrate moments of liberation where women express their true selves freely, encouraging a shift towards broader societal acceptance of diverse expressions of femininity.

Edwina and Inarra's discussion on Vasalisa's journey resonates as a metaphor for women reclaiming their inner strength and authenticity in a world often constrained by societal norms. Their insights provide a roadmap for women to embrace their complexities and unleash their full potential, promoting a more inclusive and empowering vision of femininity.

Summary

In this episode of Wise Women Stories, Edwina and Inara explore the fourth task in the story of Vasalisa, which involves facing the wild hag. They discuss the importance of standing in the face of power, embracing the wild and abandoned nature within us, and connecting with our intuition. They also highlight the significance of dreams and the symbolism they hold. The conversation emphasizes the need to break free from societal expectations and embrace our authentic selves. The key takeaways include the value of every life, the power of embracing our wildness, and the importance of finding beauty in ourselves and others.

Takeaways

  • Every life has value and a unique purpose.
  • Embracing our wild and abandoned nature is empowering.
  • Dreams hold powerful symbolism and messages.
  • Breaking free from societal expectations allows us to embrace our authentic selves.
  • Finding beauty in ourselves and others fosters self-acceptance and appreciation.

Support the show

Welcome to Wise Women's Stories, a podcast where we dive deep into the essence of womanhood, intuition, transformation, and becoming. I'm Edwina Murphy -Droomer. And rather than skimming the surface, we're here to unravel the true essence of womanhood and the layers that shape and define us. We invite you as you enter this sacred space to take a moment of solitude with just your thoughts, a comfortable chair, a warm cup of tea, and your journal.

And I'm Inara Ariane Griffin. Together we explore the journeys of women who have weathered decades of highs and lows and are now poised to discover deeper mysteries and mastery on their personal development journey. In each episode, we invite you to join us as we work to help you uncover honest insights and share profound stories that empower women to embrace their most authentic, wild, natural selves.

Hello, beautiful souls and welcome to this episode of Wise Women's Story where we're diving into the fourth task in the story of Vassalissa. And as I have said before, if you haven't yet listened to the story, you really need to in order for this to all make sense. So if you haven't yet, please take a minute. Just press pause on this one, go back, listen to the story.

doesn't matter too much what order you do the tasks in. It is ideal if you start at the beginning, because it follows the flow of the story. But that's the recommendation at this point. So I am here with Inara, Ari and Griffin, and we are so, so thrilled to have you with us on this journey. We're having fun every step of the way. If we had have hit record in the last half an hour.

to share with you the kind of chaos and the, you know, like all the bits and pieces as we pull ourselves together to look like we've got it all sorted and going on here. The techs switching on and off. And anyway, Bubba Yagga was doing her best to get on top of me tonight, but we decided to show up anyway and do this episode. And I'm so excited. So tonight's episode is Facing the Wild Hag.

And maybe if I start, this is quite a big chunk of the understanding of the wild woman archetype. And I just think it's so important that we do this particular task justice. So if I read to you the first little bit and then we'll dive into some, you know, some understanding of the other bits and pieces. So being able to stand the face of the fearsome wild goddess without

That is, facing the imago of the fierce mother meeting up with the Baba Yaga, familiarising oneself with the arcane, the odd, the otherness of the wild, residing at Baba Yaga's house for a while, bringing some of her values into our lives, thereby becoming ourselves a little odd in a goodly way, eating her food, learning to face great power.

in others and subsequently one's own power, letting the frail and too sweet child die back even further. So I feel one of the big things to look at as we think about the too good mother and the all archetypes, the different ways of being that we're addressing as we move through

The residing theme that we really want to support women to think about in this is that perfectly nice, politically correct, subdued, not rocking the boat, not standing out version of us that so many of us are trained to be. And I remember the first time I read this story and reading

the description of Baba Yaga with her hooked nose that meets her chin and her greasy hair that becomes the, you know, the wind sock and the hairiness and the warts and it's like, I don't want any part of this. Like I just, like the whole thing just made me feel slightly uncomfortable and I couldn't think how there was any part of this

this personality that I wanted to embody. So if you're at that stage and you're thinking that and experiencing that, this is the moment to just kind of open your mind and open your heart to the possibility that there are elements of this part of our psyche that is so important. This is the truly powerful, strong, stand

the force of nature, the life force that we need. So part of this, and I'm taking over this in our, my apologies, but I'll... It's not a problem. I will open space for your beautiful voice in a minute. But you know, like when we think about the Vassalissa who was trying her to be nice enough to be accepted by the stepmother and stepsister and subservient and how can I bend myself low enough so you can wipe your feet on me and then maybe you'll like me. It's like this terribly nice at the cost of our life force, at the cost of our authenticity, of our own voice, of our own way of being that

So many of us have unwittingly taken on and it becomes to a point where it's so normal we don't even see it until there's an interruption and there's a reason. Inara and I talked in the last task about losing it and becoming the wild banshee. You we get pushed to a point where perhaps that strength will come forward in maybe in a less healthy way, if we have that, if we're able to embody that strength, that absolute power, there is no need to us to get pushed to the point where we just lose it and lose control. So that's a big part of what we're talking about tonight in this particular task. So if we look at tonight's task and break it into

perhaps four different parts. So I, like there is this nice, the mundane. And the way that Clarissa talks about this is through dreams. And this is not something that I'm particularly proficient at or know much about. Is it work, have you done much dream work in Aura? I've done some, yes. And some symbols looked at them. absolutely. So some of the scariest images in dreams are, you know, just to give an example, I had a recurring dream that I would come up in a lift or an elevator, the doors would open, and this woman would reach into my mouth and start pulling out my teeth one by one. I know. And that was years and years ago. And I went and had some work done with that because it was a recurring dream. Well, it, you know, when you break it down, it's like the woman was my stepmother and the teeth are that your ultimate security. It's like your family and what she was doing was wiggling my security. When we understand that level, the image itself was horrific. It really was. And I had repeat recurring dreams about that. But when you go into

It's just your body mind telling you, are feeling really unsettled at a very deep level. In this case with this person. Yeah. So the symbols are worse than the actual reality sometimes. Well, I feel that, I feel that the thing to be really aware of in my very limited understanding is the more shocking the dream, the more.

your psyche is saying you need to pay attention to something. There is something here that you're not wanting to look at consciously and I'm going to yell at you in your sleep until you get the message. And I've had such a dream that was really, really, really, really disturbing about the very violent attack

to baby elephants. And it was this dream that I just, couldn't, I still remember waking up and I was so distressed. And I went down to the ocean at, you know, like it was half past six in the morning at a swimming group in the cold. And I was just so agitated. My whole, like my whole system was just so agitated by this dream. And I journaled and I worked on it and I talked about it I was like, what on earth is this? It was so distressing.

And it came to me and it came to me with such clarity that I knew it was the message that I needed to receive. it was, I, forever ago, I had heard how they train baby elephants in circuses and they wrap a, you know, a chain around their foot and put a stake in the ground. And at that stage, when they're little, they can't pull away.

And as they grow, they stop trying. As you look at a massive elephant that could easily pull a stake out of the ground, but they don't even try because they've been so conditioned to believe they can't that they don't. And so my dream was like, there was a conditioning that I needed to be aware of that I believe that I had a belief that I could do nothing about. And it was just like this absolute understanding of a truth that I needed to see. But yeah.

Obviously, I've been ignoring it for a while and it was very distressing. But when I understood it, staying with that horrible feeling until I worked out what it was, it was worth it. So in this particular instance, Clarissa is talking about, you know, the house that's on chicken legs and it moves and wobbles and there's uncertainty and even like a playfulness and a craziness and a joyfulness and a, know, but it is that shaking Vasilisa out of her mundane niceness, her mundane, you know, having everything set up so that it suited her stepfamily and everything was in place. And this was, this was the dream.

even though it's not a dream in the story, but this is how Vassili, how Clarissa talks about it. Now, Poki's gonna have a little party in the background. But this is one of the things. For those of you on only sound only. And he clicked through, you hear the little diddy diddy diddy with the claws sometimes. I thought it was worth us mentioning he's with us. Yes, he's definitely he's always he's always with us.

And he's named after, for those that know the golden book, The Pokey Little Puppy, this is the living edition of The Pokey Little Puppy. Yes, it is that, know, Vasilisa at that point is the unremarkable. She's so middle of the road, so mundane that this is the...part of the story that is about kind of shaking that up. And the archetype of the wild woman, the archetype of the psyche is that joyful, wild life force that is represented by the house. So that's one part of the story is looking at dreams. And if you've got the book, Women Who Run with the Wolves, Clarissa talks clients that she has and different dreams that have that kind of very, you can't not pay attention to these messages that come through in dreams. So it's worth reading those. Another part of it is standing in the face of power and how important it is to stand in the face of power with that clarity and the unwavering and yes, our knees might wobble.

And you know, like when we're children, there's that feeling of like, I hope I don't pee myself kind of a feeling. But it is the necessity as children, and as we grow and as women to be able to stand in the face of that power, because as we do, we start to absorb that power, we have a role model for what it is to be that powerful with our voice, doesn't to be that clear.

in our boundaries, in our values, in our authenticity. And for those that, which I know, NRA, you absolutely were through the stories that you shared, those who have that grandmother, who is that force of nature, the character who is the force of nature. And I can think of a very small number, probably,

At the moment, I want to say to women in my life who have been that for me, who have been role models of what it is to have that sort of certainty and power. So maybe did you want to talk about some, one of your experiences with that in our. Well, I think also to mention that when we first hear about Baba Yaga and her ugliness, this is, this is the witch wound, right? It's women's power being described by men.

And then what happens is it's a patriarchal interpretation of women's power first, and then women then take on the fear of their own power second. So it happens in that order. when we, if you think about nature, nature isn't pretty. You know, it's like some of the best times I've ever had. was walking around in a hurricane. It was fantastic. Feeling the power and seeing the ocean

Yes, it was terrifying. And there were certain points when the tiles were being ripped off roofs and I thought, I might need to go in. But I quite enjoyed the insanity of that. You know, when we let rip, if we see it as nature, it's less ugly in some way than seeing it as, here comes a cat. Whoa. Yeah, it's okay. It's animal day. It's less ugly.

in some ways than seeing it as a woman who is raging or angry or upset or defiant or whatever you want to call it. Yeah. because we can see it in nature, but when we actually bring it to ourselves, that's when we're quite unforgiving about it. Yeah. So this is Panther Griffin again, now nuzzling the microphone. Could you sort yourself out? Animal day. beautiful. I think there are moments when, and particularly I would say in business,

that I've had to, I look alternative, I have tattoos, I've got all of that from the hippie background. And when I started moving into quite high level finance situations and deals and all of that, the first bit that I felt was I have to hide my tattoos. I've got some on my fingers, those who are visual. And there was this moment where I was in a meeting with these...

you know, all the board of a bank and doing investments and whatever. And what's going through my mind is, God, they might see my tattoos. I might be shunned from the world of business because I'm alternative, et cetera. And the first stage of learning at that age and stage was to learn that actually why I am good at what I do is because of who I

Right. And that includes tattoos and all that could be like the warts and all bit. Yeah. And then as I've gone along, I've learned women freeze in the face of, there's this thing about fight or flight, but if you want to add in the feminine, it's fight, flight or freeze. A lot of women in the face of big terrifying decisions or responses.

freeze and it's a natural thing, particularly for very sensitive, empathetic kind of personalities. So you find, or one finds, and I've found this that when I'm up against it, I don't have all the answers. can't respond. all the answers and the response comes after, I should have said that. I should, you know, the perfect line, et cetera. But the freeze zone is very much like that interaction with great power and

What we have to learn is to allow the freeze, embrace the freeze, and then step up again. It's like stepping up with the conversation and not losing power with it and learning how to deal with power. know? So I see that, I know I've had personal interactions, but I've really seen it in my interactions in business. And now I can stop a conversation and go.

Sorry, you're wrong. You got the wrong end of the stick there. And use some dominant language, which was always in the you, which I don't speak, but you over there. And what happens is it, the things that have happened when I've stood up in really difficult situations is it's transmutation at the highest level. So this is that bit. How are we going to face the ugly

Yeah, scary stuff. And I think if we, you know, if we use the natural world again, for the sake of, know, women who run with the wolves, it's the, you know, it's the she wolf in the pack that sometimes needs to snarl and snap and, put the, the younger animals back in their place. Or, it's not, it's got nothing to do with bad or ugly or wrong. It's necessary. And,

Yes, I can think in my life where that's happened and I've been on the receiving end of that and as uncomfortable and as awful as it was, it is now something that I see as valuable. So I feel it, you know, and that personality trait in women, the ability to do that is something that is shamed and seen as ugly and wrong

Yes, so I think this is the part of the conversation that's really important. It's got nothing to do with being out of control or being ugly and everything to do with being assertive and self -assured and having clear boundaries and all the good things. So that's the second sort of pillar. So the nice mundane and the house that dances around on chicken legs

the need for that joyful life force. And then there's the standing in the face of power, the dreams. And yeah, well, I wrote the joyous, the wild life force. And I think this is something that we see time and time again for women that

have the opportunity to go on retreats with other women or to be in a space where they feel they're in a space where they're not judged with other women and that joyful life force that comes out, the freedom, the energy, the aliveness that comes when we allow ourselves to dance and just to be in that beautiful energy.

is something that we get to find ways to bring into our everyday lives, preferably with other people. It is lovely to have that shared experience. makes the energy all the bigger and all the life force all the more alive. The fire that is coming as this story unfolds, it is about getting that life force through the fire back into our psyche. Connecting with our intuition, knowing that there can't possibly be anything but goodness when that life force, that joyousness is really lit up. So that's something that definitely you've done a lot of through all

retreats and festivals that you've organized and things. So what maybe what are some of the experiences or some of the things that you've witnessed when people are in that space in ARA? Well, the last one that I did, which was over the summer solstice, and it was this unusual alignment of the full moon at the full sun summer solstice was just a couple of weeks ago. And it was a peak experience even of my own life

you know, running and hosting retreats and the level of, mean, there was a sauna by the river. so people were going in a freezing cold river cause it was in Cornwall. the joy, the sheer shrieking joy that I would hear in the woods, people coming back from walking in the woods and seeing this incredible nature. So it was very nature. We did a bit of digital detox and we had a fire which was out.

for the summer solstice, set in tensions. did activations. I was playing singing balls around and they all had their eyes shut. And then there was this moment where I saw, cause I was leading the thing. I saw the full moon starting to rise just perfectly over the horizon. And they're doing this deep meditation and around the fire, listening to the crackling. And there was a pause when I said, all right, now open your eyes and just turn your head.

And they went, all of them. There was just this, it was absolutely magical. We had a, dance, we did a cacao ceremony and then we did dancing. And honestly, even for me, I was like, wow, I haven't danced like this. mean, I'm talking for ages, not just a quick little dance or like it's a disco or some club or whatever. was, people absolutely went wild and they had the biggest breakthroughs because when you use that kind of nature and ceremony really, the symbols that you are experiencing, you start to connect so deeply with your life force as we're talking about, what makes life worth living, sensuality, sexuality, all of that is happening in a sort of personal way. And people made the biggest decisions over three days that were life -changing because if it isn't aligned for that, then we are not doing it. And several people said, you know, this was like a crucial moment where they made a decision that maybe their jobs are so dull and mundane, or maybe their relationships are, that this is an example of what is there on the planet, so why not go for it? But yeah, I mean, I've had so many examples of that and running a yoga festival as well, standing in the middle of

I was waiting for the moment when I would know like, vision had landed, you know, and it wasn't in the first year. It was probably in the third or fourth year that I did that. And I was just witnessing human joy, like the experience of all the yoga and all the music and people just, me standing in the middle, looking around and thinking, I did that. That's my vision, actually.

How manifesting and what it is, is pure human connection, you know? Yeah. Yeah. So you can hear I'm bubbly. get all alive when I think about that. Yeah. Yeah. I do an event in November. I've got another one coming in this year called effervescence and it is only for, for clients that have been working with me for the year. But the, in the last one, the greatest feedback that I received that I heard was this group of women that had never felt so comfortable to just be completely themselves in a room full of women before. And isn't it amazing that, you know, we're all women sort of 50 plus or most of us, I think one's mid 40s, but it is a sign of society that we can get to these ages and not really experienced that before as adult women.

So this is part of something that we all get to start working on and talking about together. The other thing that's sort of popping into my mind is this story that this conversation is unfolding is this conversation of beauty and what beauty really is. And for me, there is nothing more beautiful than a really self -assured strong woman. And I think about to name women that everybody knows, know, sort of the Judy Denchers of the world and women like that, that are not stereotypically beautiful. I mean, she's covered in wrinkles and has very short hair and is larger than we would say is, you know, like the ideal body type in it, but she's just breathtaking. She is so divine because of that inner strength and self -assured way that she has. I think she's one of the most beautiful.

And her women on the planet, she's amazing. And you know, Zoria Evora, who was this, she's a singer. I can't remember the island she's from. She's a large black woman who has the most exquisite voice. She is dead now, but I had the privilege of seeing her and she sings barefoot. So it doesn't matter whether she was in the poshest place, like some, you know, like the Royal Albert Hall in London.

She would always dance barefoot and her feet were not pretty, not pedicure. They were big flat feet, all corny and wrinkled and whatever, because she comes from a culture where it's like, you know, on the street. she was just gorgeous. Yeah. Absolutely. So that's what we want. More of those examples, like not just demure little pretty this and that. And I have to say that because you and I

human design, line five, right? So I'm a five one and you're a, or I'm a one five. You're a three five. And traditionally that's known as the heretic. And because the heretic is such a, I'm so not Christian that the word heretic just brings up all that hideous Christian, you know, sort of history where they were persecuted.

heretics for anything, right? And tons of women were killed as heretics, et cetera. But really when you get into it, when it was renamed, it's like you are the one, you are the one who has all this maverick energy or you're the one that got away. And that's Melanie Anne Laird who said that. And so it's like, we are here to break the system. That's what we're here for, to come up with a new thread of energy.

Well, that is often, you know, the danger, the scary, you know, we would be represented as the hags in the past. And bring on the heretics, you know, I don't like the word I would say, so bring on the Mavericks. Yeah, that kind of thing. I actually I know we've had this conversation. I love the word heretic. I wear it quite proudly. Because it gave me it gave me

a word for an experience that I've had all my life, all my life. And so suddenly I had this word that was like, that fits and I'm not alone. know there's others. No, would maybe say, you know, see if I was to reinterpret that, I would say actually it's the witch. Yeah. It's rather than the heretic. It would be or the shaman or the, you know, it's that. I don't think I've ever seen myself as, as magical. So heretic felt like, because I've always.

made or often made decisions that put me on the outside of normal. Yeah, the heretic kind of felt like a better fit, we all like language is so powerful when we decide that something fits it. Yeah. As long as we're choosing good words. We don't want to say I'm a, you know, a

a fat ugly hag or whatever is the horrible language that we can use on a bad day. But yeah, using powerful languages is good. There was a couple of things that I just really highlighted in this chapter, because I do think it's a super empowering when you spend time with this particular task. So just as a re -grounding, this is about the initiation

of intuition. So these are the wild woman psyche, the intuitions that we get to really connect with to find our most authentic voice and the freedom to be exactly who we are here to be. So

one of the things that I particularly wanted to pull out again is this too nice over adaptation in women often occurs when they are desperately a feared of being disenfranchised or found unnecessary. This is one of the biggest things that as women, we get to look at the value of our lives and there is a reason why each of us is here and really being clear on that reason.

What am I here for? Who are the lives that, and we're all impacting lives every day in small and big ways, but it's just really connecting to that. There's nothing unnecessary about any life on this planet.

Then she talks about the dreams.

I think that were the main things.

the enigmatic and intense power of the life, death, life, mother. It means to be able to learn, to be able to stand what we know. It means to stand and live. So I feel like we've probably touched on the main pillars of this particular task and the takeaways, the things that I feel.

a fun to play with as you contemplate this task is really just where is the wild abandoned nature of dancing in the woods and taking yourself out to a place where you can be authentically you surrounding yourself with people who embrace the authentic you allow you to to trip and fall and explore and be curious about what that looks like. It's not

It's not an all knowing until you spend time with this intuition and initiating this particular part of ourselves, the Baba Yaga. So is there anything that you wanted to add to this? know, I think it would be for the listener or the watcher to really start considering how controlled you

how subdued you are, what circumstances bring out that, I need to settle down. I need to be quiet, whatever. And then make a fantasy date with yourself to go wild dancing somewhere, to do these things. Like Edwina and I have talked about lighting a fire and going, but I have a fire pot in my garden, a fire, whatever you call it. Fire.

pit and it's like, where can you create your fire pit? Where is the place that you can dance wildly, you know, when nobody is watching and a little bit like the rage hole that I mentioned at one point that I have assigned people to go and do create your rage hole. This is like your pleasure. Where are you going to like dance wildly? You didn't come in, you came into the, this life alone.

And we came with our specific soul pact of what we're here to do. And you will go out alone. It's not about being at the measure of somebody else all the time. It's like, what gives you life force? What do you love doing? And what could you set up to do in a way to unleash some of that? Yep. And then go Sorry, darling, I just talked over you. Sometimes it

You know, sometimes it feels like you just need to take one step. It's like, it might feel like too big a step. And so one of the best first steps is to get out and walk in nature barefoot. Like that really is one of the best first steps. Just connect with mother earth, the energy and feel the earth, the grass, the dirt beneath your feet. And if that is a first step, then that's a perfect first step. And then it's like, what's the next step, you know?

A next step, well, not for us here in the Southern Hemisphere at the moment, but if you're in the Northern Hemisphere and it's a bit warmer, when was the last time you lay fully naked in the sun? Yeah. You know, like feeling the sun, the breeze on your skin, like that can be a really massive mental task for some people who just have never been or haven't been outside their bedrooms naked for years, possibly.

So there's, little steps, little steps are great. Lots of little steps. Yeah. Even light a candle, like bring some wild in, know, change the atmosphere of where you work or you are. Bring flowers in. You know, bring in plants, bring nature inside so that you're attuned to it. Yeah. Yeah. And I think if I can leave with one last task that is one of my favorite tasks to give people is see

the beauty in every woman you look at. Find something beautiful because when we start to see the beauty in every other woman, we start to see more of the beauty in ourselves. That's a place to end. All right, beautiful souls. All right. I hope you have enjoyed this episode and we'll be back with task five in the next episode. All right. So much love and bye for now.