Bullying Doesn’t Start At School It Starts At Home S:2E:29

Bullying gets talked about like it’s only a school hallway problem, but we see it everywhere, from group chats to corporate offices to family dynamics at home. We start with some real-life banter, then pivot hard into what bullying actually is: repeated aggression, a power imbalance, and the kind of behavior that sticks in your head long after the moment passes. We share personal stories of getting picked on for “stupid stuff” like being tall, being poor, being a tomboy, or simply liking books, and why those experiences can shape anxiety, anger, and how you handle conflict as an adult.

Then we get into the modern accelerant: social media. Cyberbullying is easy when a keyboard warrior can perform for an audience, disappear, and pretend they never said it. We talk about why giving kids social media too young can set them up for comparison, harassment, and constant pressure, and what parents can do right now with limits, consequences, and real coping skills. We also touch workplace bullying, including exclusion, sabotage, and retaliation fears that keep people quiet even when policies say they’re protected.

We end with our take on tough love vs harm, why respect still matters, and a funny real parenting moment that shows how quickly “I can’t” can turn into “I did.” If you’ve ever wondered where the line is between protecting kids and raising them resilient, you’ll have opinions by the end. Subscribe, share this with a friend, leave a review, and email us your topic ideas at Boomer and Gen Xer at gmail.com.

email: boomerandgenxer@gmail.com

Transcript

Welcome And Family Banter

SPEAKER_02 0:04

Welcome everyone to today's show. A boomer and a genius are welcome to a bar coming to you from the Rabbit Run Studio, where you, as our listeners, will experience some wit wisdom, some smart ass read, and a mother and daughter questioning, are we even related? My name is Bobby Joy, and my co-host is my mom Jane. And hopefully we're here to entertain today. Mom, how are you doing?

SPEAKER_01 0:29

I'm doing really well. And usually we talk about the weather, don't we? But we're not going to do that today. I'm going to ask you, Bobby, personally, how's your climate? How's your barometric reading? Are you doing okay?

SPEAKER_02 0:41

No.

Storm Pain And Migraines

SPEAKER_01 0:42

Oh. Oh. Do you want to talk about it? I'm listening. I'm listening.

SPEAKER_02 0:49

We actually do have a winter storm rolling in right now. And so my head is killing me and my joints are killing me.

SPEAKER_01 0:55

So isn't that funny how that works? Because I've had a lot of breaks and stuff too. And the other day we had a storm, not snowstorm. Are you expecting a snowstorm?

SPEAKER_02 1:05

Yeah, it's supposed to be a winter storm.

SPEAKER_01 1:07

So my whole body hurt from this stupid rainstorm because I've had so many breaks in my body. But I was thinking about you personally, Bobby. I just want to make sure that you're okay.

SPEAKER_02 1:19

Oh, for the love of God. We both know that I'm not. Let's just get past that.

SPEAKER_01 1:24

So um I will ask you this though. Are you healing pretty well after your incident that you had? And are you still having headaches?

SPEAKER_02 1:33

Still having headaches, still actually having migraines every day.

SPEAKER_01 1:37

Oh man.

SPEAKER_02 1:38

They gave me a medication to try to stop the migraines every day. It's like a preventative, but it's only kind of dulling them. So next stop is neurology to see what's really wrong with me. To see what's up there.

Teeth Trouble And Implant Costs

SPEAKER_01 1:52

That's gonna be a that's gonna be a wasted trip. Um, so we I gotta tell you this though. I remember last year, I guess it was like when was it? Maybe October, November. I broke that tooth and found out it was a canal tooth. And so I had to go in and have it pulled, and there was some type of um other tooth attached to it, you know, uh, because I have those bridges. And so they they pulled it, and it's like a year, it takes like a year to get a freaking implant put back in. And so I've been walking around like a crackhore for about the past seven months, and I mean that just because of my teeth, okay? I don't mean because of anything else. So about a week ago, my the other side now, I don't have a tooth on this side. If I smile real wide, I do look like a crackhore. But um, I so I go in, I broke the tooth on the other side, which was a root canal tooth. And it's like, oh my goodness, this must be what happens when the Titanic goes down.

SPEAKER_02 2:50

Well, you know, root canals, I mean, they actually drill out your tooth and so it becomes less stable. But yeah, I mean, you and I we talked about this before that I don't have back teeth on my my upper part of my jaw on both sides.

SPEAKER_01 3:04

So yeah, but he said if he pulled this one, I wouldn't have a way to chew because then I would have I would have them, you know, and it the your insurance doesn't cover these implants. It's like six grand. By the time you get all done, it's like six thousand dollars. And I said, you know, can you just I I won't smile anymore. Just pull that one again, and I won't, I just won't smile. And he goes, No, you need it to chew.

SPEAKER_02 3:29

Uh well they didn't they didn't tell me anything about chewing, so maybe it's because I'm fat, but they didn't say anything about chewing.

SPEAKER_01 3:36

They figured you would find a way.

SPEAKER_02 3:38

She's like, you'll figure it out.

Karaoke Night And Confidence

SPEAKER_01 3:41

She's got this one down pat. We don't have to worry about her. So guess what uh Dr. Domain and I did last night? This'll kind of shock you.

SPEAKER_02 3:50

Oh, I'm wondering.

SPEAKER_01 3:51

Yeah, so we were at the bar and uh here in in Cleveland and we did karaoke. Yes. So for the love of God. Seriously, it was fun.

SPEAKER_02 4:01

And we I'm surprised you didn't go run out of town with pitchforks and torches.

SPEAKER_01 4:06

No one said that didn't happen. So uh but it was fun, and uh yeah, he can sing, he can sing, so he drowns out my voice. That's what happens. So, anyway, have do you karaoke Bobby at all?

SPEAKER_02 4:22

Absolutely not.

SPEAKER_01 4:23

Can you sing at all?

SPEAKER_02 4:24

Uh, I think I can, but others might disagree.

SPEAKER_01 4:27

Yeah, I love to sing. Too bad I'm no good at it. Um, your sister likes to sing too, but she's not that great. But I think she's better than me, that's for sure. So, anyway, that's what we did last night. Did you enjoy it last night there, Dr. Domain, when we went to do karaoke?

SPEAKER_00 4:44

It was different.

SPEAKER_01 4:45

It was different.

SPEAKER_00 4:45

Yeah, it was good.

SPEAKER_01 4:46

It was it was kind of fun, didn't you think? Yeah. I mean, we don't know anybody there. We who what do we care what anybody thinks?

SPEAKER_00 4:53

It didn't pay worth anything, but it didn't pay.

SPEAKER_01 4:56

No one gave us any tips or anything.

SPEAKER_02 4:59

Yeah, and I'm so nobody was throwing money at you from the audience.

Why Talk About Bullying

SPEAKER_01 5:03

No, they were throwing things, but it wasn't money. So um, anyway, I think we are talking about a subject today that not only affects our children, but it is driven not only by children, but also by adults, unfortunately. And what is that topic, Bobby?

SPEAKER_02 5:24

Uh, today we're gonna talk about bullying.

SPEAKER_01 5:26

And why are we talking about bullying today?

SPEAKER_02 5:29

Uh uh did I bully you last week?

SPEAKER_01 5:33

You bullied us yesterday. You bullied us yesterday into what topics we were gonna talk about. She she's like, we're gonna talk about this and this, and it's like, okay, well, thank you very much.

SPEAKER_02 5:44

Um well, you know, we had talked about uh talking about bullying before, and you had on your Facebook had made a video um where you were outside and you're an ambassador for something called battle paddles, which is a pickleball thing, and you had made that video outside, and I'm watching it and I'm like, wow, this is a really good video. But I wanted to comment something, but I'm like, no, because people say I'm bullying.

SPEAKER_01 6:09

What did you want to comment? The hair on my face?

SPEAKER_02 6:12

Yeah, I was gonna say, don't ever do the backlight. Don't don't have the sun behind you because every time you turned your face, it looked like Sasquatch coming out of the room.

SPEAKER_01 6:27

It looked like I I had a five o'clock shadow, didn't it? Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 6:31

I mean, you haven't dermaplaned lately. I can tell that.

What Counts As Bullying

SPEAKER_01 6:34

Well, it's funny because um, yeah, sometimes even if you're plucking, you know, just plucking your hairs on your chin and on your lip and stuff, it's like, dang, Dr. Domain, you couldn't have told me that thing was hanging down there. I could have braided those three. And well, he didn't want to bully you. I know, he didn't want to bully me. Okay, well, I don't consider that bullying, but yes, I do know that that did show up in that video. And I do not care. I do not care, just so you know. But anyway, bullying is is kind of a widespread issue with approximately one in five students at school saying that, well, between the ages of 12 and 18, that they're experiencing it. Now, I experienced bullying when I was in school. Hell, I bullied, you know.

SPEAKER_02 7:22

It's nothing new.

Getting Picked On As Kids

SPEAKER_01 7:23

It's nothing new, and people are acting like this is all, oh my goodness, my child is so has so much anxiety from being bullied. And, you know, my question is always, you know, what is it that they're being bullied with? And have you had experience with bullying, Bobby?

SPEAKER_02 7:42

Yes, and no. I mean, when I was younger, I got bullied pretty badly, and it was really weird because I got bullied about really stupid stuff, like because when I was right around 12 years old, I I shot up like a weed. And so I was like one of the tallest kids in my class, and they bullied me for it. And I'm like, what are you even bullying me for? I like because I'm tall. Oh my gosh, you are forbidden.

SPEAKER_01 8:09

You were you were way taller than the boys, but that's normal. Girls always shoot up quicker than boys do during puberty. But you you're tall. You're tall. How tall are you?

SPEAKER_02 8:19

Um, I'm like right around 5'10, 5'11.

SPEAKER_01 8:22

Yeah, so that's pretty tall for a woman. And I didn't get bullied for that. Um, I've talked about, you know, we were very poor and I I would say not educated very well when I was younger and did some really stupid stuff. And I remember, you know, being poor, uh, seriously, you go to school dirty, you go to school hungry, and you go to school unkept. That's what I got bullied for. And uh I got bullied for not being intelligent. Uh, because my brother, my older brother, uh skipped classes, skipped grades because he was so smart. And it was always, why can't you be like him? And so, yeah, I was bullied in in that respect. And Dr. Domain, were you ever bullied?

SPEAKER_00 9:08

No. You were the bullier? No, I just I hate that term.

SPEAKER_01 9:12

Yeah? Yeah, I don't want to. Why is that?

SPEAKER_00 9:14

I I just think I just think it's you get picked on.

SPEAKER_02 9:17

How about that?

SPEAKER_00 9:17

Okay, all right, picked on. I I never heard the word bullying in school.

SPEAKER_01 9:22

Yeah.

SPEAKER_00 9:22

I mean, it was just it's some made-up words.

SPEAKER_01 9:25

Yeah, I remember them using the term picked on.

SPEAKER_00 9:28

Picked on, yeah, I guess.

SPEAKER_01 9:29

But I think I think Bobby's right. It's been around a long time. Unfortunately, what's happened is is it falls into one of those categories that, oh my gosh, now, you know, my child has some issues because, oh, let's say that it's bullying. Now, I'm not saying it doesn't exist. I'm saying that, you know, what is bullying? Well, it is repeated aggressive behavior, physical, verbal, or social. And it's uh typically driven by what would be considered by me or you, uh, some sort of power imbalance that can, you know, cause us ourselves, um, to think that we have some physical uh threat that some type of harm is gonna come to us, or it can affect you mentally because you think about it all the time. Now, I I got the crap beat out of me in school. I mean, I you know, I ran my mouth back then too. So this isn't new, this isn't a new skill that I have.

Social Media And Cyberbullying

SPEAKER_02 10:30

Um, I mean, and I got I mean, I got bullied for being a tomboy. Yeah, yeah, for hanging out with the boys. I got bullied for being an emo kid because back then that wasn't cool. I got I got bullied for being smart because I like to read books and they would they would pick on me for reading books, you know, during quiet time in class and stuff like that.

SPEAKER_01 10:51

Yeah. And so some of the, you know, we talked about some of the forms of bullying can be today, uh, unfortunately, we have social networking. And I think that is, you know, for kids under 16, I gotta be honest with you, I think it's horrible to even let them on there because that's one of the things that really affects how they think, how they feel about themselves, what kind of standards are supposed to, you know, and and there's a lot of parents that aren't out there saying you don't have to live up to those standards. What they're saying is, oh, you could you would look cute in that outfit, or your hair would look, you would look really cute with that haircut. Well, they look cute now. They look cute without that outfit.

SPEAKER_02 11:36

So And you know, a lot of these kids, they're getting social media at eight, nine, 10 years old. First of all, what the hell, parents? What are you doing? Yeah, you know, you're setting them up for failure. And, you know, in my opinion, when things happen over social media to minors, to you know, kids that are under 16 years old, I think the parents have uh have a role in that, they have some responsibility in that. Because why in the hell am I seeing nine-year-olds on Snapchat?

SPEAKER_01 12:04

Yeah, no, I I totally agree with you in that respect because you know, cyberbullying is the most prevalent type of bullying out there right now. And you know, if you think about it, a lot of people, you know, what do you call it when somebody runs their mouth behind a microphone or behind a keyboard warrior? Keyboard warrior. They're keyboard warriors, you know, they run their mouths, but then you know, you get them face to face and they're like, huh, what? Who? Me, you know, and yeah, and now they're scared to death.

SPEAKER_02 12:34

The last couple of years, you know, especially with our family, uh, the keyboard warriors out there um running their mouths about what had happened to our family. And yet when I seen them in public, all of a sudden it was like, oh, bless your heart and everything. It's like, no, no, bitch, say what you said behind the keyboard. You know that now that I'm in front of you, all of a sudden you're you this is this is different. Yeah. And you know, I grew up in the era where our bullies, they were face to face. Like we got beat up, we got hit in the mouth if we said something wrong. You know, we it wasn't this cyberbullying stuff, and I didn't here's the thing, you know, my kids have experienced cyberbullying, and I looked at them and I'm like, log off. Right. Like, what is right? I'm being cyberbullied, oh boo-hoo, log off.

SPEAKER_01 13:22

Right, right, right, exactly. This isn't brain surgery, you know. You you have some choices here. And I remember, like I said, getting into fights, and you know, I I got in trouble for it. And it was like, they beat the crap out of me. But the question by my mom and dad was always, what'd you say? What was it you said to start that? Did you say anything? Yeah, but yeah, who not only who swung first, but who was running their mouth first? And you know, so sometimes all I was told was, well, you deserve that one. Right. You know, maybe that'll stop you, or you know, well, that'll teach you to to do that. And it did. I mean, it really did. And now, if if somebody's kid comes home, you know, we'll say with a black eye, the traditional black eye, and you know, the parents go, oh my gosh, we're gonna hunt those parents down, we're gonna go talk to them. All they're all they're actually focused on is your child hit my child. They aren't focused on how did we get here? Because I can guarantee you that children who bully have parents who bully.

SPEAKER_02 14:37

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:38

Children who bully have parents who bully. It is a typical thread, it is a typical psychological phenomenon that happens. And so, you know, and a lot of times the adults don't really think that they're bullying. They think that they're just standing up for themselves, they're putting their little borders around themselves. You know, I have boundaries. We all have boundaries. You can shove those where the sun don't shine, okay? We all have boundaries, and you're not respecting mine either. But the fact is you need to think about where this started.

Adult And Workplace Bullying

SPEAKER_02 15:12

Yeah, it's true. And, you know, a lot of these parents not only are bullies at home, whether it be to a spouse, a significant other, or their own children, even. Um, but uh there's there's a huge spike in workplace bullying among adults.

SPEAKER_01 15:31

That's a good point. And it isn't necessarily someone who is threatening to hit you, someone who is threatening to, you know, meet you out in the parking lot. A lot of those threats are I'm gonna take you down, you know, with the boss, I'm going to do these things, I'm gonna expose you because of these things, and yet those things don't even exist. So yeah.

SPEAKER_02 15:56

And the common forms in the workplace include, like you said, verbal abuse, cyberbullying is huge among adults, uh, social exclusion and sabotage within the workplace.

SPEAKER_01 16:09

Yeah, I could see that happening. And um, I've never experienced that, to be honest with you, but you know, in a large corporation, and I wouldn't call it bullying because I'm like Dr. Domain, I think that's kind of a uh pussying out type of term myself. Sorry, folks, if y'all, you know, took offense at that. Uh, didn't mean to trigger you. We'll talk about that in another in another session. But in a large corporation, especially in the industry that I was in, it was a good old boy network. And so there were things that were said that were not true, you know, being an only woman or limited number of wom women in the the entire organization, it's hard. I mean, it's really hard. And so you do face some of that, you know, those false accusations. Um, you face gosh, you know, I mean, I started working, gosh, way back in the late 70s. You know, we faced a lot of sexual harassment. You know, today I think people would look at that as being bullied. I look at it as sexual harassment, but you know, I don't know. But there are legal ramifications, obviously, right?

SPEAKER_02 17:18

Right, there are, but you're also when you bring forth um, you know, the proof of these accusations and things like that of um bullying in the workplace, you do face retribution regardless of the company's policy. The company can say, well, you know, we the it's not allowed to have rep retribution or anything like that if you come forward with these issues. Bullshit, that it happens and it happens often.

Family Patterns And Home Stress

SPEAKER_01 17:47

It does, and I've seen it also. I've seen that same thing also. Um, but you know, I'm not I'm not negating the fact that there is impact to the victims. Um, you know, when I was bullied, but I was bullying too. You know, I was I was doing the same thing. I think bullying people almost makes you into a bully because you're like defending yourself. And it's like, well, I better become a badass in order to, you know, um survive, kind of. But a lot of the victims, you know, will experience deep isolation. I didn't have a buttload of friends when I was in school. I had a few friends that I was close to. Um, they have anxiety, uh, we talk about that, uh, depression and and even some long-term trauma. And I get it. I mean, I really do. I I think back of when I get into, you know, some type of discussion with an adult today. I think back of, you know, what happened to me in the past and how I handled things in the past and how I handle them today is totally different.

SPEAKER_02 18:49

Yeah. And a lot of a lot of times, you know, you had talked about the these kids who bully, a lot of times have parents that bully. Well, a lot of times it does start at home. And parents, they have to kind of walk a thin line because you don't you don't want to raise your child to be this, you know, super soft, impressionable glob of crap that's laying on the floor. That anytime you, you know, come near them, oh, they're scared and they have feelings about it. But at the other end, you don't want to raise these kids who are, you know, physically, mentally, emotionally abused, and then turn around to do it to other people. You you kind of have to get that in the middle. And a lot of times these parents, they are bullies, you know, they they they exercise excessive control over these kids. Um, they have social isolation with these kids, making the kid feel guilty or responsible for what the parent is going through, you know. And we've always said you and I both say, you know, these kids should not be listening to or dealing with adult issues.

SPEAKER_01 19:59

Right.

SPEAKER_02 19:59

Okay. So if it's my issue, that's my issue. Right. It is not going to fall onto my child to have that guilt and that that fear and you know, things like that. But a lot of kids, they come from really, really crappy homes. I mean, how many times have you heard, you know, that a kid comes to you and says, you go, hey, what's wrong? Well, um, you know, my mom's been calling me stupid and worthless, and um, you know, she's having a problem paying bills. So she's been telling me that um she's gonna take my birthday money uh to pay the bills, but she's out here doing this, and I just I don't feel you know, it's it starts at home one way or the other. All of this starts at home. Now there are there are some very rare exceptions of kids that I won't say are born like that, but they do have some wiring issues up there.

SPEAKER_01 20:58

A little more sensitive, I would say, in some respects. That you we you know, you do see that that sensitive or no one is malicious, malicious or you know, no one has to taught them coping skills.

SPEAKER_02 21:11

Right.

Teaching Coping Skills And Respect

SPEAKER_01 21:11

And um, you know, a lot of it does stem from the personality of of the parents. And um I I guess I do believe that, you know, if you've got somebody, let's say that it's me and I've got young children at home, and I'm I'm working my butt off, and and let's say this is you because this is you, and you know, you struggle to make ends meet sometimes, and you don't know what you're gonna do. You're you're in a financial bind, you feel that insecurity, and you know, I think that manifests at home and causes a lot of stress, a lot of anxiety, and then that's pushed off onto the kids, like you said, and so there are long long term effects to that. Um, you know, because uh you like I said before, I think a A child being bullied can turn into a bully, or it goes the other way. And now I I have all these issues. And it's because no one taught me coping skills. No one taught me turn that internet off. No one taught me I can walk away. All they say is, oh, you know, I I'll take care of it for you, or you know, you're bullying my child or whatever. Tell your kid how to handle it. You know, teach your kid how to handle it. Um, I watched a show the other day. I just want to mention this because it was on our subject, and I remember that the woman said, I don't want any situation where my child ever, ever in their lifetime feels like they're threatened or are under any undue stress or um have to face, you know, blah, blah, blah. And I thought, bitch, you might want to change that tune because that's life. That's true. That's setting your child up for failure. That is setting them up for failure. And she said, you know, she was just, and everybody was like, oh yeah, we understand. And yeah, okay. Um, that's like saying, I don't want to expose my kids to any, you know, any activities because I'm afraid someone might swear or someone might, you know, say something wrong to them. Give me a break. Life is gonna be bad. Life is tough, get tough and get over it.

SPEAKER_02 23:29

And and I think we do a disservice to our kids when we have issues like that. You know, we some of us have past traumas as children, and we either continue those traumas onto our children, or we go the complete opposite and we make sure our children never experience any kind of you know trauma or you know, self-issues that they they have to take care of. I mean, we it it's a fine line, it's a fine balance as a parent because you know, you don't want to push off your insecurities onto them. You don't want to, you know, push off your fears onto them and have them carry that on. But at the same time, you know, these parents are also not setting these boundaries of what's acceptable and what's not. You know, one day they'll say, Well, you know, you can't, you can't cuss. And then the next day they're so tired they say, okay, well, I don't care anymore. Right. And then the next day they're punished for it. It's like it's a sacred thing.

SPEAKER_01 24:31

It's inconsistent. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:33

Yeah. And these kids never learn what is acceptable and what isn't. And, you know, you you have these parents where their kids are getting bullied at school. And so the parents will pull up on these children and try to fight these children. And it's like, what are you teaching your children? Well, first of all, I mean, honestly, if if a 16-year-old beat up my 10-year-old, I'm going fisti-cuffs because that's a grown-ass child right there. But at the same time, you you don't want your child witnessing that. You need to sit them down and say, What happened? What can we do? What would make you feel better about this?

Tough Love Trash Can Lesson

SPEAKER_01 25:13

Right. And I think we again, you know, this all goes back to what was the root cause of this to begin with. You know, what started this whole thing? And we may not ever, you know, get to that point because it may be something historical with that child. But, you know, if you I think what you have to teach your children is you gotta negotiate with other people and you've got to understand. And you don't have to like them. I don't care if you don't like them. Um, but you gotta be kind and you've got to be respectful. And people go, well, respect is earned. I don't disagree with that, but on the other hand, as a excuse me, on the other hand, as a human being, they deserve respect. And so, you know, if you really want to get out of this thing and you really want to teach somebody, in the meantime, put some thought into the words and your actions on how you address it. Um, Bobby, you had a situation here this past week, and I just I had to laugh because this involved my granddaughter. You were not, and you were caught on camera with this.

SPEAKER_02 26:22

I was, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 26:24

I have security cameras. You were not gonna let this thing ride. And you want to tell the listeners what happened?

SPEAKER_02 26:34

So, so let me start off. Let me preface this by I don't believe that I bully my children. Okay. I I tease them some, I get them ready for the real world, you know, there there's no gentle parenting going on here. But at the same time, my children know that I'm their soft spot. They can always come to me. So that being said, my 10-year-old um was told because she apparently her room is a barn and she doesn't ever want to clean it. And so I made her clean her room and get all her garbage put up. And she I told her, I said, take the garbage to the outside garbage, you know, to the bin outside, which is right outside our back door, not an issue. So she goes out and she comes in a few minutes later and she goes, I can't do it, I can't do it. And so I'm like, you know, in my head, I'm going, the hell you can't. And so I walk outside with her and I looked at her, I said, put the garbage in the in the trash bin. And she kind of lifts the lid a little bit and she goes, See, I can't do it, like where she's throwing a fit.

SPEAKER_01 27:39

And I'm like, So I gotta, I gotta tell you, because I was watching this this video, and I don't mean to interrupt you, but it was so funny because she stood in then now. This is a big garbage can that you would wheel down to the street, you know, when the garbage can comes. She was standing directly in front of it, trying to lift the lid, and she lifted it a little bit, teeny tiny bit, and she goes, See, I told you I can't take the garbage out. Keep going with your story.

SPEAKER_02 28:08

So with my kids, I I'm a doer, not a shower. Like, I'm not gonna do it for you, just so you can see how it's done. So I said, Move the garbage bag, stand over here and lift the garbage lid. So she did, and she got the garbage bag in it. And I said, you know, make sure it's all the way and and shut it. And she shut it and she's goes to stomp back inside because she's mad because I wouldn't do it.

SPEAKER_01 28:32

Oh, I know she was. She was.

SPEAKER_02 28:34

And as we're going in, and I was I told her, I said, You're not a princess, ain't nobody doing this for you when you get bigger.

SPEAKER_01 28:42

And she goes, I know it was so it was so funny because all she had to do, and you you did tell her, uh, was move to the side of the garbage can so that she could lift the lid all the way up and then throw the garbage bag in there. And it was just what a learning tool. I mean, that's something you need to post on YouTube or something because it was.

SPEAKER_02 29:05

I thought about it, but then I was like the backlash, you know, people be like, oh, you're so abusive or whatever. It's like I was kind of worried for a minute the neighbors heard, but thank God we have really good neighbors that understand my parenting style.

SPEAKER_01 29:18

Yeah, and I think there's a difference between bullying and somebody who provides tough love. I'm a tough lover, um, and a motivator. I would rather motivate you to get that done. I'm not gonna bully you. I'm telling you, there's consequences to both your positive actions and your negative actions. You choose. Okay, that's the way life is. There are consequences to everything that we do. And I think that um, again, you know, as an adult, there are a lot of adult bullies out there, and they really are just running their mouth, acting like they're all that. And some of them just need to be taken out behind the barn and and be whipped, you know. But that's just me. So don't try to gaslight me and make me question my my own reality and my own person because I'll walk away from you, I'll leave you standing, and I don't care who you are.

SPEAKER_02 30:11

I mean, the thing that I learned growing up is there's always somebody bigger and badder than you. That's right. So, you know, you're gonna go out and bully somebody. Eventually, you're gonna meet somebody who's a bigger bully than you, and they're gonna put your ass in the in its place.

Final Thoughts And Listener Email

SPEAKER_01 30:26

And it's not just bullying, you know, there's it doesn't matter if you're in a sport, it doesn't matter if you have a skill, there's always someone better than you. And if that bothers you, then it's your job to get a leg up on them, right? It's your job to study harder, it's your job to work harder, it's your job to practice more. It's not their job. So, you know, wow, whah. Um, if you think they've got a leg up on you, that's on you. Yeah, there were times, man, I'm not kidding you. When I was climbing the ladder in the corporate world, I there were some people that had a leg up on me, and I thought, dang, you know, I I want to be the best in that area. I want to be the one making the most in that area. That was kind of my thing, you know, in in the corporate world. But that's life. You, you know, you want to be a better person, show it. You need to, you need to practice that. So I think that's probably all I've got for today. Did you have anything else, Bobby, that you want to talk about?

SPEAKER_02 31:29

Um, well, you know, you said that everybody, you know, deserves kindness and respect and everything. Well, I gotta tell you, you know, there there are certain people that absolutely do deserve to be bullied, you know, um, pedophiles. Oh. I will bully them to the grave. Anybody hurts animals, you know. I will bully the shit out of you.

SPEAKER_01 31:49

I thought you were gonna say my mom.

SPEAKER_02 31:54

Hey, we bully out of love. That's right.

SPEAKER_01 31:56

That's right. We're not bullying, we don't use that term. We uh we uh know how to joke with each other and listen, we both know how to walk away, and we both know how to say, hey, you know what? Don't say that again. I don't like that. So and we're good with it. But I think that's probably all the insanity, and it is insanity, and uh, you didn't really trigger me today, Bobby. So I guess I'm okay. We appreciate y'all joining us here at the rabbit run studio. Be sure to follow us. We look forward to spending time with you each week. Please like us. And if you have positive feedback for us, or if there's a topic that you want us to talk about, drop us a short email at Boomer and Gen Xer at gmail.com. If you have hate mail, uh, you can hate on that all you want. Uh we'll we'd burn it down, man. We just burn it down. So anyway, uh until next week, I'm Jane Burke.

SPEAKER_02 32:48

And I'm Bobby Joy.

SPEAKER_01 32:50

And you're stuck with us. Peace out.

SPEAKER_02 32:52

Later.