BeTempered
BeTempered
BeTempered Episode 53 - Faith Under Fire: Misty Hollis’s Journey as a Community Leader and Cancer Survivor
What does true resilience look like?
In this powerful episode of BeTempered, hosts Dan Schmidt and Ben Spahr sit down with Misty Hollis, Director of the Richmond Family YMCA and a two-time cancer survivor, as she shares the extraordinary strength that unfolds when faith collides with life’s hardest trials. Proudly sponsored by Catron’s Glass, this conversation reminds us that true strength is forged in the fire.
Born into a fourth-generation ministry family, Misty’s early life traveling across Texas in her parents’ revival van only hinted at the tests of faith ahead. From career ambitions to leading a community, she opens up about how personal heartbreak—including pregnancy losses and two battles with breast cancer—transformed her faith from inherited tradition into an unshakable personal conviction.
“I’m not afraid of dying,” Misty shares with striking honesty. “I’m afraid of not being with Tim.” Her words capture the heart of a love story that’s weathered not just cancer, but the spiritual reckoning that comes with life-altering diagnoses. When doctors discovered her cancer had returned after five years of misdiagnosis, Misty made a bold choice: “I’m running into the fight, not away from it.”
Her story also shines a light on the power of community. From board members who prayed over her to friends who showed up unasked to drive her to treatments, Misty’s experience proves that true support isn’t passive—it’s action.
Whether you’re facing a personal battle, walking alongside someone through theirs, or looking for inspiration to navigate life’s challenges, Misty’s journey offers a moving testament to finding strength in vulnerability and purpose through pain.
🎙️ Tune in now to BeTempered with Dan Schmidt and Ben Spahr, sponsored by Catron’s Glass, and hear how Misty Hollis’ unwavering faith continues to inspire hope and build stronger communities—even in her darkest hours.
Hi, my name is Allie Schmidt. This is my dad, Dan. He owns Catron's Glass.
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Speaker 3:Welcome to the Be Tempered Podcast, where we explore the art of finding balance in a chaotic world.
Speaker 4:Join us as we delve into insightful conversations, practical tips and inspiring stories to help you navigate life's ups and downs with grace and resilience.
Speaker 3:We're your hosts, Dan Schmidt and Ben Spahr. Let's embark on a journey to live our best lives.
Speaker 4:This is Be Tempered.
Speaker 3:What's up everybody? Welcome to the Be Tempered podcast, Episode number.
Speaker 4:One of season two, episode 53.
Speaker 3:53. Here we go into year number two and we're going to come out with a bang. So welcome back to the podcast where we dive into stories of perseverance, purpose and the kind of grit that inspires real change. Today's guest is someone who defines all of that and more. Misty Hollis has spent her life pouring into others, through her work in local schools, service in Wayne County government and now as the director and CEO of the Richmond Family YMCA. Her leadership has touched every corner of this community. But what makes Misty's story even more remarkable is the resilience behind it. A two-time cancer survivor, misty has stared down some of life's toughest battles and came out stronger, not just for herself but for the countless people she continues to serve and uplift every single day. Her journey is one of faith, determination and the quiet strength that builds better communities. Misty, it's an honor to have you here. Welcome to the Be Tempered podcast.
Speaker 5:That's a great way to get me to start crying. Oh my goodness, dan, I've known you for a long time. That's a sensitive side of you.
Speaker 3:Well, I do my best. I do my best. No, we are excited to have you, misty, and I told you last week when we met. Your names came up many times for many different people to share your story and it's a powerful one. So, as you've listened to some of these and as we had that conversation last week, which was very touching and I know today will be as well, I'll try hard not to cry as much as I did last week.
Speaker 5:I don't know, I'm pretty emotional still.
Speaker 3:No, it's great. So how we start every episode is to start from the very beginning. So talk about your childhood, growing up and what it was like for you.
Speaker 5:I am fourth generation in ministry of a preacher, so my great grandmother was the first licensed United Pentecostal pastor in Texas, and that was at a time you're talking like 70 years ago.
Speaker 5:I mean it just didn't happen for women to be in that type of role, and she built two, three churches. So my influence really began and we'll talk about this later. She was probably the biggest influence on me. If I think about it now, looking back as you get older, then both grandfathers were pastors ministers. My dad, my uncles, all were pastors ministers and my now, my sister, her husband and my brother both are in ministry.
Speaker 5:I'm the one who hasn't followed that path it's in a different place, it's in a different role, but so I grew up in ministry. That's really all I knew growing up, and Texas is my home. I was born in Houston. Dad and mother evangelized for the first two years, so they had a white van. My baby bed was in the van and they traveled and this was before cell phones and any of that stuff. So they had a white van, my baby bed was in the van and they traveled, and this was before cell phones and any of that stuff. So I was in the sixties.
Speaker 3:So they traveled all over the state of Texas, or all over the country.
Speaker 5:All over the country. Yeah, their biggest revivals, tent revivals. I mean they would do tent revivals, pop up tents and did them in churches and um, he was an evangelist, so that's what he did. And then, when I was, I would say I think, mother got pregnant with my brother and they he opened what they called a home missions church in San Marcos, texas, and um started very small and we lived in the church the back part of the church, growing up when I first, when we first moved there and um, then my brother and my sister were born in in that San Marcos area.
Speaker 5:So, it's, that was my upbringing.
Speaker 3:Okay, so different. So you're, you're in Texas, you're living in a church that was when I was younger.
Speaker 5:Yes, we got a house eventually yeah, eventually dad got a house.
Speaker 3:Talk about school a little bit.
Speaker 5:I was. I mean, I went to public school in second grade and I'm not sure why, but mother decided it was best to homeschool me for one year. My, um, my grandfather, had a private school in Houston, texas, and along with his church, and so it was male. I mean, it was different how it is now, everything's online. Back then you filled out coursework, you mailed it in, they graded it, you got it back, and so I did one year like that. And then when we were, when I was seven close to eight is when we moved back to Houston and my dad went to help my grandfather and his ministry and my mother did too.
Speaker 3:And you and you were still in the public school, back in the public school system, when we moved to Houston and went back to private school. Okay.
Speaker 5:Yeah, and I graduated, um, you know, we were there until I was in 11th grade and dad, um, just, life was happening in the marriage of my mom and dad and you know happens with everybody. I mean you have little speed bumps along the marriage of my mom and dad, and it happens with everybody. I mean you have little speed bumps along the way. And Dad decided he needed to focus on the family and made a huge sacrifice he and Mom both did for the sake of the family and their marriage and we moved to California. Dad knew a family but he didn't have a job. He just we went out there and we were there for three years and he did a ministry out there eventually. But really it was more about just realigning the family and his marriage, his time with mom and making sure that they were in the right path. And you look at that and that was hard as an 11th grader.
Speaker 5:So I went to school one year out there in public school and it was just a huge shift for me. That was just. It was hard. It was a beautiful place to live. We were in Orange County, california, san Clemente, and if you've been out there, it is beautiful, just beautiful. The school was fine. San Clemente High School was fantastic. I have a good memory of it. But when we moved we did another move to Irvine, california still Orange County and that was going to put me in a different school. So I requested that I do homeschool again in my senior year and I started working. So, yeah, it worked.
Speaker 3:That had to be. That had to be challenging. You know you go through that schooling to your junior year in high school. That was tough, and then you're not only going to be switched to a different school, but a completely different state. Culture, culture shock Very much. You know at that, at that age, that had to be very challenging.
Speaker 5:Oh no, it was tough, it was really tough.
Speaker 5:Uh and and I think dad and mother had we had talked about possibly me staying I mean, that was some conversation of me staying in Houston, but that is, that was not the desire of the family. I mean, we need to stay together as a unit and and we talk about it as a family. Now, my sister was really young so I'm not sure she truly understands the impact and the decision that Dad made, that sacrifice they made to make that move for the sake of the marriage and the family, to keep the family together. And it was. But it was a turning point.
Speaker 5:When you look, now that I'm 53, and you look back and you think about what was the turning point for our family unit and for my parents' marriage, that was it and that was huge for dad. I mean, dad, you leave everything you know, you leave your contacts, but I'm going to my family's first and we're going to make this the priority. That was a big decision and our, our family unit is we're very close, we're extremely close and it's I think it's because of that sacrifice that was made.
Speaker 3:So you graduate from high school and you said you go into the workforce.
Speaker 5:Yeah, Well, I was still working going to. So I was working in Pomona, California Dad had had some connections and mom did too with a company called Wilbur Ellis and I was an office manager. I was like 18, doing that kind of work and it just fit me. I mean, I felt natural to be an accounts receivable, it felt natural to work in an office. It felt I just didn't seem like it's like where I was supposed to be.
Speaker 5:It was very natural for me to do it and so I was still going to school out there. I really didn't. Dad preached a revival outside of Brookville Indiana. I was in Brookville Indiana and somebody had reached out to him in ministry and asked him to come out here and do a revival. And he fell in love with Cincinnati, brookville, just the culture, the trees, the green space. You know. He just fell in love with it and he came back and he was like hey, we're going to move to Indiana.
Speaker 3:From California.
Speaker 5:Yeah, from California, and at that time I had changed jobs. I was actually working with a trucking company as office manager jobs. I was actually working with a trucking company as office manager and I really didn't want to leave because I'd felt like this you know, I'd been out there and I'd kind of got my fit and the owner of the company was kind to even offer time for me to stay. But again, it's about the family unit to me and I did not want to be away from my family. I just it just never felt natural for me to do that. So I think it was like a parade. When we drove into Brookville, we had the biggest moving van you could have. It was towing a vehicle. Then we had a station wagon behind that and another pickup truck behind it. I remember and you have to remember, I mean I was 20, 19, 20.
Speaker 5:And driving to Brookville, I see home of what is it? 1200 people, yeah, like, oh my gosh. And it was june, july, so the corn was growing and no, there's, no, yeah, there's no street signs, like you don't know where you're going, and and it was a just a huge shock. It was beautiful, but I was, I have to say, I was nervous like, like where, what am I supposed to do? How am I supposed to make a living? Where do I go from here? That's the first time. I had that feeling of not knowing what my next steps were going to be.
Speaker 3:So you got the culture shock of going from Texas to. California, california to Indiana. So so you eventually settle in, right? Yeah, settle in. So what are you doing?
Speaker 5:Yeah, so I, I mean I started working part-time down there and came up I looked at Miami University, IUPUI, and I, because of me feeling like I was a non-traditional student, I knew I was going to have to work, I knew I was going to have to go to school at the same time. It, not those two campuses just didn't fit me very well. And the person I was living with at the time, a farmer, he's like hey, you can go up to Richmond, there's a some sort of campus up there, you can look at it. And came up here and IU had just opened their second building Hayes Hall just opened it and it fit for me and I started working up here and became a. I went into first call temporary services, just walked right in and said I need a job and they hooked me up with Centennial Wireless. You probably weren't even born yet.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I remember the name. I don't know what year that would have been. You probably weren't even born.
Speaker 5:But I was. That's how I met Sing the singing fireman Brian. He was working at Centennial Wireless too, and both of us, I mean that's how I first met him. But I was secretary there and I did little odd and end jobs until I landed at the Chamber of Commerce. That was probably my biggest break.
Speaker 3:So you get a break to go to the Chamber, so talk about that, what that was like.
Speaker 5:It was good. I was a fireball. I mean I had to learn to temper my aggressive personality. I just I think about things I did. Then you know you walk into a place and you just say we need a membership for a booth and I just didn't have any fear. I didn't. It was just interesting from when I look at it now, and I remember Doug Peters was the chamber president. He brought me in a couple of times. He's like you just need to cool your jets or a little pressure heavy on the sales part, you need to just cool off. But it was such a great opportunity for me.
Speaker 5:I met some amazing people that have mentored me through life. I mean David Stidham is still my mentor. That's how I met him was through the chamber. Names like Jan Passmore, bob Rosa, alan Rosar I mean there's just a list of people that have been, that were a part of my life then that taught me so much. And they didn't have to. You know I think about that. I think about Jim Passmore didn't have to invite me to Kiwanis, he didn't have to take me to lunch and teach me the ways to kind of sell membership and sell booths at an expo, and you know he didn't have to do that, and people here in this community. I feel like they adopted me. I mean it was. I was a complete stranger, young, and they pulled me into their life and helped me be a part of their life.
Speaker 3:Well, I think that's that's. It's kind of cool to hear that, because you know when you're, when you're in your early twenties, and you all you want to do, if somebody tells you to do it, you you're just going to do it, you know, because you don't understand until you get older.
Speaker 3:Some, well, we want to do that, but maybe we want to go about it this way or that way. So those are all things that you learn. So it's it's cool to hear that, because I think back on the when I was 23 years old and I was just a hard driver and.
Speaker 5:I'm going to do this and I'm not.
Speaker 3:You know, you figure things out with experience.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I know with experience. Yeah, and it's still I don't mean to be it's still hard for young women to move into and you'll learn this with your girls. Your girls will experience it. I don't know if you have kids or not.
Speaker 4:I got boys, you got boys as well.
Speaker 5:It is. I mean, it's still a little hard for it's better now but then for women to be in a leadership position and we had a committee we were hosting at the chamber at that time I mean the chamber membership was 900 members. I mean it was a very large chamber membership base and we hosted the Midwest Professional Women's Conference. So we'd have women from Ohio, kentucky, illinois and Indiana that would drive in for this conference every year and the women that were a part of it Mrs Rowland, diana Pappin, pat James. There were professional Mary Hayab women that were part of that committee that helped me to maneuver about being a professional woman in this area and how to be graceful but also you can still be strong, and that is. Those moments have still stayed with me. It was. It's not as difficult now, but then 30 years ago it was.
Speaker 3:Yeah, challenging, that's pretty cool. So you're in the chamber, you're getting settled in in the community, meeting lots of people. What's next?
Speaker 5:Yeah, I had the blessing of meeting Mayor Dennis Andrews and he, out of the clear blue at a ribbon cutting in the Rose Garden, one day, pulled me aside and said I have a place for you in my administration. I'd love to talk to you about it. And I was going still going to IU East. I was one of those long I think it ended up taking me 12 years to get my degree because I was working and going to school at the same time and then decided to get married and all of that 97. But he pulled me aside and asked if I would have some interest in being a part of his administration. I met with him and I felt it was an opportunity of a lifetime for me.
Speaker 5:My degree was going to be political science and I felt being able to understand local government and opening that door was the right thing to do. And it was a hard choice to leave the chamber. It really was. I loved. I had no problem with that job. I loved working at the chamber of commerce. I had no problem with that job. I loved working at the Chamber of Commerce. But going to the city did open up a lot of other opportunities for me with relationships with people and then understanding the basic of local government and that was a good.
Speaker 5:It was a good experience.
Speaker 3:Now, you kind of glossed over something there. You said you got married, I did so let's talk about that.
Speaker 5:Yeah, Mr Hollis, I met him at IU East and I fell in love with him first time I saw him and he did not love me back. He did not love me back. There was an eight years difference there, so I chased him around.
Speaker 1:IU East for a couple of years and he finally just stopped running.
Speaker 3:This is the truth, so you caught him. Well, he just said I just got just stopped running.
Speaker 5:This is the truth. So you caught him. Well, he just said I just got tired of running. Anyway, yeah, so we dated May 1995 is when we started dating, and in 97, we got married.
Speaker 3:So you finally caught him. I finally caught him, tied him down. Tied him down yeah, you're working for the city in an administrative position. Yeah, I finally caught him Tied him down, tied him down. Yeah, you're working for the city in an administrative position. Yeah, so things are good.
Speaker 5:Yeah, life is good, life was good, so keep talking on the city part, on the marriage part, and things are progressing. Yeah, my first hiccup in life that I wasn't ready for because he was older, I felt we needed to hurry up and create a family and my first hiccup was we got married and within a month I lost the first baby and I it was hard but it wasn't like, okay, we can do this again. Yeah, still at the city. Um, and then we tried again and got pregnant and we were excited and that one got us to close to three months.
Speaker 5:And we lost that one too. That one was harder and that did. We were about year five in our marriage about that time, and that is when kind of the reality of my relationship with the Lord, my personal relationship with the Lord not just because I was raised in the church and heard about it my whole life, but that's when my personal relationship with the Lord started to bubble up and realizing I needed to have one. I needed, you know. Is this real? Is it not real? Questioning a lot of things about faith and what did I do to deserve this? Those questions started at that time too, and it just was hard and it became a challenge for our marriage. That because, with Tim being older, we can have this conversation now.
Speaker 5:At that moment I was so focused on having a family and I felt that was my role to be able to give him a child and give our family a child, my parents a grandchild. That was the next step. Right, you get married, you have family, get your degree. Life is good. And when I started realizing that my body wasn't being able to give me that, that just put a lot of questions in my mind.
Speaker 5:Tim didn't know really how to respond. I mean, this was really difficult for him. He's an introvert, he internalizes things. He has to think through it first. Where I'm the external person, where we've got to talk about it, we've got to deal with it, we've got to plan, we've got to fix it, so let's go. And he's like we're not. And that's when I mean I would say, if I had, if there was any time in our marriage that I questioned things, that was, that was I didn't know what to do and I, yeah, so I sought counseling at that point so talk about that a little bit you know, there, there, there came that point and a lot of stress, a lot of friction, a lot of stress, a lot of friction, a lot of questioning.
Speaker 5:Oh yeah.
Speaker 3:How'd you get through it?
Speaker 5:Yeah, it's embarrassing to say you need help and it's a hard step to you know you want everybody to feel confident in who you are and not that you have to show this weakness. And it was my first time to say I need help. I needed to figure out what was going on with me mentally and emotionally and it was the right thing for me. We had a Christian counselor here in town. He's retired now. I look back at that moment with him and he it was the right thing. I mean I needed that. He was so good. He really helped me understand the and I hope I don't offend people that are watching this. I want to be careful about this.
Speaker 5:But growing up in the denomination I grew up in, united Pentecostal, a part of the life and the culture of that denomination is about family and I don't want to say it's just that denomination. I think it's a part of any denomination that you go into, that you know we're gonna have family pizza night, we're gonna have family movie night, hey, we're doing the easter egg hunt. It's a family thing and so kids are just a part of that whole conversation and things that you do in a church and and subliminally, the message is. You're not worthy unless you are having a child. And when we got to that point and he helped me understand, I didn't do anything wrong.
Speaker 5:It's not anything that I did. It's just a part of life. I mean your body. Some people are able to have kids, some people are not. This isn't a punishment. Life, I mean your body. Some people are able to have kids, some people are not. This isn't a punishment. Now it becomes. What can you do and what role can you play if your body isn't going to allow you to have a child? So that was it was I believe it helped our Tim. Never, we didn't go together. It was just me.
Speaker 5:He went separately once or twice with him, but it really was my journey. I mean, it's something I had to work through and there were still things that needed to work through with my parents and the things they went through. And you're still uprooted, you move. I mean there's just a lot of things you have to go through. And so I went through that with him and he really helped me and for me I needed a faith-based counselor and that's what it was just a perfect timing. I mean, when I look back at things and people and it's like, okay, I was at the right place at the right time with the right person. That guided me through that first part of my journey.
Speaker 3:So what I want you to do is and I hope everybody listening understands what you just said is that how important it is, especially in today's world and today's society where everything seems so perfect in everyone's lives you were very vulnerable there to share that story, because I know that it still impacts you to this day. Oh, very much so I'm tears in my eyes now.
Speaker 5:I mean, I remember the day I lost the babies. I remember the day that I celebrated the babies, that I was pregnant and we were in Texas with the second one, and so I was able to tell my grandparents. We drove up to Dallas to see the other set of grandparents and they had a little shower for me. So when you lose and you have items I've got baby items in my house and knowing that I don't have a place for those, it's, it's hard, and I, you know, I have a lot of friends who have lost babies and then they had children, so happy for them. But I do know that those moms still remember the ones that they didn't get to hold, and um, and that's the heart.
Speaker 5:You know, that's the hard part. I got to a point, though, where I just my prayer to God was if this isn't my play, if this isn't my role, if I'm not going to be a mother to children, then bless me and help me, have other ways and we'll talk about that, obviously where I can have kids in my life and serve kids and serve families, and that was the prayer. I mean cause that I needed fulfillment. From that perspective, I needed to be able to know that, if I'm going to volunteer with kids, or whatever it might be, I'd still need to feel like there's a fulfillment of being around children.
Speaker 3:And so what did that do for you and Tim's relationship?
Speaker 5:We. I mean we got better. I mean it was, luckily. He was going through a program at our church called Joshua's men, and so he was meeting with men regularly once a month, and then he also led a group. I think for him that was what he needed. He needed to be able.
Speaker 5:I know there was a night that there was um. He shared with me that he was vulnerable about the feelings and the frustrations of being a husband and not being able to fix it. So you know, from a like I don't know what to say to her, I don't, I can't fix it, I can't fix her body, I can't fix her emotions. And when a commercial comes on and it's a baby commercial, I'm sitting there crying at the tv. What do you do? I mean it's like I don't, you can only hold her so much, and so it's so. I know that there was a night that he shared that that was a part of the men's night during bible study, that they talked through that and the men helped him a lot. So thankfully that helped. I think he was going through that. I was doing the counseling.
Speaker 5:Tim's a very. He grew up in a. He was a preacher's kid too, so his walk with the Lord, had he had to do that on his own and learn. And so I'm blessed, I'm blessed, I'm blessed to have a husband that I feel unconditionally loves me and will fight for me and fight for a marriage. And that's where we were. I mean we got. We got through it.
Speaker 3:Yeah, which is amazing. Yeah, what I I guess my point to all that was is that if there's someone out there, who might be going through what you have went through, um to not be afraid to, to reach out and seek counseling.
Speaker 5:It's nice to talk to friends it is, and I, but I needed help and I knew it. I mean, I knew it was to a point where I just you know it, when you're breaking down and you're crying, when you don't need to be crying, and you can't sleep and certain things are triggering your emotions, is you just get to points like I need the help and and.
Speaker 5:I swear it was um and certain things are triggering your emotions, you just get to points like I need the help and that's where I was, and I know that's hard. It's hard for people to ask for it. It worked for me.
Speaker 3:Great advice. So you are working through that at that point in your life. What's going on outside of that with work? You're still in the government. Yeah, I stayed in that vein.
Speaker 5:I moved across the street and worked for county government for a little bit and um did a visioning program called wayne county vision, and I think that's when I first met you actually is when we started the young adult professional network yeah through that process and it's called hype now yeah kind of interesting how I'm happy it's still going on right, but that's how it started.
Speaker 5:And it was a great experience. I mean it really linked me into understanding the rest of Wayne County because I was so focused on Richmond. It opened up a lot of doors for me to understand Wayne County, understand planning, development, how that all works. And still, you know, I wasn't looking, looking for a job, but there was one that came up in Winchester and the facility was an outdoor team building facility and I just thought, well, I am a girly girl, I am not a woodsy girl, but I went out there with my high heels and I interviewed and there were three really good candidates that came, became friends of mine actually for the job of director and I got hired and basically I moved my way up to Winchester and it really opened up another set of doors for me. But it was a. The main reason they started the camp was for kids that were in the juvenile program, okay, and it was supposed to be another opportunity to take them out, kind of outdoors team building.
Speaker 5:And once you go through the ropes course, you actually debrief each section. I don't know if you've ever done one. It really is phenomenal. I mean I would love to bring it here to Richmond one day, but it or the concept to it, because you, once you learn as a team, you got seven to 10 people that are going through this section, whether it's climbing over the wall or whether it's a they call it a spider's web and you're getting every team member through the web and how you're doing it, communicating and planning through it. Then, after you're done with it, you sit down and you debrief. Well, there's a lot of stuff that comes out in that. I mean you've got people that you have to trust that they're going to lift you up and get you through the spider's web without touching a piece of the rope and you're dealing with. I mean, at times people were yelling at each other and screaming at each other, and then you've got to calm them down. And so it was a good, it was good for me to understand team building, to understand the mind of young people that are struggling, and then we started opening it to schools and we got kids from schools out there and then we started bringing the business community out there. It was just a really, really wonderful job.
Speaker 5:And out of the clear blue, dr Borff called me here at Richmond Schools. They had received a sizable grant called Safe Schools Healthy Students, and he asked if I would sit down and meet with him and I said, no, I love my job, I love being out here. I know people were surprised that I worked out there, but I just loved it. And then two months later he passes by, calls me again. He's like hey, will you give me a chance? I'll just sit down with me.
Speaker 5:Well, I did, and Tim and I went home that night and we did what we call family planning. It's two of us, but we were going to do a family plan. What are our goals as a couple? What do we need to do? And as we walked through, I had my own personal mission statement. He had his personal mission statement of where we felt God was leading us. And when we had talked, saw that it was. It was on sticky paper on the wall. And I'm looking at him like, oh my gosh, like this is what I need to do. I mean, I it was, and I cried. I didn't want to leave Camp Yale, but I felt this was the next phase for our marriage. This was the next phase for my future. I can have bigger impact on kids at Richmond schools. It just so. Yeah, I made that decision to come back at Richmond schools and yeah, so you go from yeah, you go from helping kids and businesses and everything up in Winchester.
Speaker 3:You come to the Richmond community schools and and you're you're working there, so you make that another big change. A big change, yeah, and things keep moving forward, yeah, so talk about that.
Speaker 5:Yeah, so we. So that's also when the politically thing started opening up. I ran for city council at that time and, um, and again I think because I was at Richmond schools, I started seeing things I was concerned about in Richmond and I felt, okay, it's time for me to step up. You can complain so much, and then it's time. It's time to say, okay, how am I going to solve this solution? By myself? Not by myself, but and we had a great team. I mean Phil Quinn and Ron Oler, who's the current mayor. He ran at large and me and Clay Miller, jeff Locke I mean we just had a really, really solid group of people that ran and, and um, kelly Cruz was on there too, and I think that was my first time to really see didn't matter about party that council, we could work together. It didn't. We might have internal little fights and stuff, but we worked together and, um, we had our own goals. We shared those with the mayor. This is what we expect as council. We're going to get done. It was just a great, great group of people to serve with. And then I served again after that.
Speaker 5:So while I'm working at Richmond Schools, I'm also on city council. But that's when that political door opened up for me as well. And then I mean, I guess you know, you think about, I didn't apply for any. Some of these just all popped up, I mean all these opportunities. And God just kept opening up the door. And David Stidham, one of my mentors, walked in Richmond school's office one day and it was after Dr Borf had announced he was leaving and so I wasn't sure if I needed to stay there or not. And he said we have an opportunity at the Y if you're willing to look at it. And so I did, and that's where I'm at, still there after 10 years.
Speaker 3:So you leave the schools, you go to the Richmond family YMCA where you're now the executive director, the CEO, the the big kahuna Right, and so so talk about the Y a little bit, talk about life in general, and there's some major things that are happening.
Speaker 5:Are we good on time?
Speaker 3:Yeah, you're good.
Speaker 5:I just feel like I'm talking and you're just looking at me, you're good.
Speaker 3:I feel like we need popcorn or something Kevin's got some. No, you're good, don't worry about time I don't want to bore people.
Speaker 5:No, you're not boring anyone. No, anyway, born anyway. So I first year in at the. So the Y was really close to closing their doors again. Like there's these stories every time you hear if you grew up here it's like, oh, the Y might stay open, might not stay open.
Speaker 5:We were at that stage again and luckily we had just some amazing people Dave Stidham, Pauline Cole that stepped up and said, look, we'll help you financially, but you're going to have to turn the ship around. We had a good membership base. We were probably running about I don't know 200 kids in sports and we had one after-school site. So it was going good. And then the board. We just focused on leadership, getting the board back together and how do we need to have a stronger board. And David Stidham stayed in another year as board president, which helped a lot for me personally and um.
Speaker 5:So we ended up with a good board and 10 years later we're at 600 kids in sports and almost 300 kids in child care, two daycares, and then we have after school care at richmond, northeastern and in Liberty and looking at one other school to open up after-school care right now. So it's it's been amazing, but a part of that is a board and a part of its vision. But during all that, so you kind of feel like okay, hey, we're getting there, we're getting there. And I ended up one morning waking up and I couldn't walk and I had L4 disc had herniated all the way into my sciatic nerve and, long story short, it took like three or four months for people to accept what was really wrong with me and ended up having back surgery. So that was another time in your life. It's like okay.
Speaker 3:Yeah, back surgery is nothing to mess around with.
Speaker 5:No, no, and it so. That was a time it's like, okay, that was eight years ago and that was a hiccup. Well, you have to really trust the Lord, because my job is fundraising and that puts you out I mean you're. I was out of commission for a while and I'm having to really trust God to help keep the doors open and fundraising open. And people stepped up. That just amazed me.
Speaker 5:I mean just called and said what do you need from us? And I would say a check. So funny, you know, the aggressive person working at the Chamber of Commerce wasn't as aggressive. It just seems like when you get older it's just fascinating for me to feel like I don't have that same not the drive, but just I'm a little bit shyer than I was then.
Speaker 3:Well, maybe maturity, maybe life experiences you learn things, communication with people you still got that fire. I can see it. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 5:You need to temper me, temper me.
Speaker 3:Oh, you're tempered, You're tempered.
Speaker 5:So we got through that and still growing and still going and again I shared this with you the YMCA's mission is still faith-based. I mean our mission is still around teaching Christian principles through our initiatives. I mean that's very much still our base. So having a board that is faith-based is huge. I mean they really they buy into the mission, they buy into prayer. They know if you pray, god will answer. They have at times they've had faith that I didn't have faith and they did and they walked out and spent money. And I'm like, ok, guys, if he thinks what we need to do and oh, god will take care of us and he does he just keeps doing it. Ok.
Speaker 5:But so six years ago, out of just doing a regular mammogram I was faithful to always do a mammogram because my great-grandmother, who was a pastor, had breast cancer. So I was very faithful to always want to make sure that I had that. And we were doing Christmas tree sales that's one of our big fundraisers. I was in my Christmas tree attire and I went out just thinking, no big deal going, gonna have mammogram, walk out, what just they kept bringing me back in, you know to, and I thought, okay, this isn't good. And by the third time they did another mammogram. She said you know, we really need to get you back and we're gonna do an ultrasound. And I said I don't have time, I gotta get back out the tree light. I said can we reschedule this? Well, but you need to come in pretty soon. So I did and it turns out I had breast cancer and that was um shocking. I did not anticipate that. I wasn't in my plan, it wasn't.
Speaker 3:Can you remember the when they told you your initial reaction?
Speaker 5:I do. So we had the ultrasound and they brought me into an office and I still think the medical community you know this is their job, right? They tell you, oh, you have cancer, or it looks like you have cancer. And I still sometimes feel like they need to have training in how to help people through that conversation, because that was as blunt it was. We.
Speaker 5:She said, well, it looks like there's some, it could be cancer. What we'd like to do is go ahead and plan your surgery excuse me, like I don't. Even my husband doesn't even know yet. And she said, well, we're do it's just a biopsy, we're going to get you in, we're going to do the biopsy. And I went, no, we're not. And she said what I'm like? No, I want a second opinion. I need a second opinion. I need, I need to talk to my husband. He doesn't know yet. I, I need time to think through this. I just I wasn't expecting this today. And she said, well, we need to get you in right away. And I said, well, I appreciate that, but I need time. So I left and human behavior is very interesting. So outside the breast center at Reed is the grocery store. Good Lord there is.
Speaker 5:Yeah, it's their store. That's how I dealt with it. I went in and started looking at stuff in the store because this can't be true, be true, this can't be okay. I just need time just to be here a little bit, and I didn't buy anything, I just needed to look at stuff and pulling out clothes and looking at it. And I get in my car and I called my husband and he said well, we're going to do a second opinion. I mean, we need to do one just for the sake of feeling good about it.
Speaker 5:And so my dad had just finished his treatment with rectal cancer and survivor, I mean, and I watched God work miracles with him because he really was in so far gone with his. So I realized, okay, god can do this. I mean, we can do this. Still not real to me, though. I mean just still going through the motions. You feel so numb like you just can't. This isn't real. And we got into iu, um, thankfully, because dad was a patient there. So we were able to get into iu and um started their testing and their process and it after I officially received I'll never forget I was at having an executive committee meeting at the Y my phone rang and I said I need to take this call, which is unusual.
Speaker 5:I don't ever leave a meeting walked out and it was the doctor and she was letting me know and it was the 31st of December letting me know that I had cancer. That was confirmed, and so by February 1st is when I had my first surgery. So it was pretty impactful. I don't know. You go through that process of denial. I mean every stage grief, denial, anger, all of that was a part of it. Fear, sorry, got emotional here. The thing that was important for me because again, this is like the next step, right with my relationship with the Lord. Back surgery helped me get there, but this was like me owning it. Is it real? Is this real? Are you really the God that I serve? Are you really my savior? Are you really my healer? And so that was the step again where I feel like I became the closest to the Lord and my relationship with God became my relationship, not my parents, not my grandparents, not my great grandmother, mine, and that's where it started for me. Um, so yeah, that's pretty powerful.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so you know you're undoubtedly questioning, you know everything because you've just been given the diagnosis that everyone fears. But you flip it upside down and you say, okay, this is my journey, this is where I have to trust in you and I'm going to get through this with your help. So you go into surgery, go through the treatments, kind of talk about that.
Speaker 5:And that was not going to be your last test. No, it was not going to be your last test. No, it was not. Um, they IU was amazing. I mean, I had a great, great journey with them.
Speaker 5:Um, we chose to do the removal of the cancer and reconstruction at the same time, which, at the time, it made sense on paper, but it was a very, very difficult surgery to recover from. My surgery was um 1st of February and we I didn't leave my house until mid-March, and my husband not that I, you just go through so much like you don't want people to see you, you don't. You're embarrassed, you don't, um, but my, they had felt confident that when they went in to do the surgery that they were going to be able to get all of the cancer. The call two days. So you know this is all worth it. We're going to do it, we're getting it out, reconstruction surgery at the same time, and two days later I get the call from the doctor and I did not have clear margins, and what that means is that when you remove cancer, you're supposed to have margins around the cancer. That should be clear.
Speaker 5:Well, mine were not, and so I remember falling into the recliner. My mom was with me. Tim was getting ready to leave for work. I remember just collapsing in the recliner and just I mean just weeping uncontrollably Like this is not the plan, god. We were supposed to go in and have surgery and this is I'm supposed to be back at work for weeks. This is not the plan. And I hated this for Tim because he had to leave watching me in that place and I just said it wasn't worth it. This wasn't worth it. You know, and I I didn't tell you this, so everybody might have a different way of understanding how God works, but I was at probably my deepest part of trying just like. This doesn't make sense. You've abandoned me again.
Speaker 5:I'm questioning everything and my mom's cell phone rings and it is my dad's, one of my dad's mentor. He lives in Florida, he's a minister, one of my dad's mentor. He lives in Florida, he's a minister, and I hear his voice say where's Misty? And my mom said she's here and he said I'm in prayer and God told me to call and I know I didn't tell you that the other day and she handed me the phone and he said I'm on my knees and God said to call you.
Speaker 5:I hadn't talked to Ralph Sykes I don't talk to Ralph, he's my dad's mentor, he's not mine and he prayed over me and he said God's not finished with you yet. You need to stay strong. So um got off the phone and okay, god, here we go, let's do this. So I had to have a second surgery to get the rest of the cancer out, and the weird part of all that too is and I can tell you this when she called after the second surgery, she said there were no cancer, like she said I feel bad. There wasn't any cancer there, like they'd gone and it was gone. So okay.
Speaker 3:Okay, talk about a range of emotion.
Speaker 5:So went back to work and started my radiation treatment at Reed and just kept moving forward. People are amazing in this community. I mean I'd had friends that stepped forward and made sure we had food and make sure that we were okay. And that first journey. Every year I went back for my mammogram and every year it was hey, you're cancer-free, cancer-free, cancer-free, cancer-free.
Speaker 5:Well, september 2023, I just started noticing like my eyes started sagging and I started getting some pain in my neck over here, and I went to my eye doctor and my eye doctor said they call that Horner syndrome and it's usually tied to cancer. And so he's like we've got to get an MRI. Well, they did have my brain, my head, and it came out clear Nothing was wrong. And he's like well, this is a little weird, but it is what it is right. Well then my pain in my neck just kept continuing to get worse my arm, my shoulder, here. So I sought help and every doctor I went to said nothing was wrong. We did MRIs and everybody kept saying nothing's wrong. So, june 2024, I'm in my shower and I'm just. I am asking God to help heal my body because I'm in so much pain at this point I can't exercise, I can't do weights, I can't lift my arm. I can't lift my arm. I can't sleep. I'm in a recliner. I've moved to recliner Um where's your head at?
Speaker 3:What are you thinking?
Speaker 5:I did not think cancer. I thought I. That wasn't in my head at all. I didn't know what was wrong, cause everybody kept saying I was okay, like everybody. They'd look at these MRIs. I had CT scans. I had two MRIs and and every doctor CT scans, I had two MRIs and every doctor that I saw kept saying nothing was wrong. So I got out of the shower that day and I just I'm done, I'm going to go to my back surgeon, I'm going to spine surgeon, because if it's in my neck, maybe it's. You know, there's something else.
Speaker 5:By then you could feel the knots in my neck, like they were bulging in my neck, and they got me in so quick. Orthoindy got me in so quick and 15 minutes. He let me know that there were masses that were blocking my nerves and that we needed to have an MRI. I'm like, okay, this would be my third MRI. He said, no, we're gonna do your MRI on the brachial plexus, your shoulder and this part of the neck. And so three, three, four days later he called back and goes we gotta get you back at IU. You've got cancer. He says. What it appears to me is that what you have is cancer.
Speaker 5:So, um, my cancer surgeon was available to read the MRI. She called me a couple days later and said that it appeared. It was in my lymph nodes and my neck and in my shoulder and a pec muscle at that time. That was before the PET scan and she said you know, I'm sorry, misty, I don't think the cancer was ever out of your body. I think you had it there. I think it was in your lymph nodes. Well, the mammogram only just focuses on the breast part and they did not do a PET scan. So it had been growing for five years is what she still believes happened.
Speaker 3:So now, where's your head at?
Speaker 5:Oh, anger, I was so angry. I was angry at every doctor that couldn't find out what was wrong with me. I was angry at the institution I was angry at I wasn't angry at God at that point.
Speaker 3:But you were questioning again, oh yeah, oh yeah, like why?
Speaker 5:why are we right back at the same place I was. I felt like we got out of. Why are we back here again?
Speaker 3:Where's, where's Tim at what's what's he?
Speaker 5:Tim is the protector, right. I mean, his job, he felt, was to make sure I was okay and um, so we scheduled biopsy and it, and it was the same exact cancer that was in my breast before. And when we got the final word that all the way home from IU to to Richmond, there wasn't one conversation, we didn't not one word. And I don't it's not, I wasn't mad at him about that, I was in my place, he was in his place, right. I mean, we needed and we've been married 27 years now, so it's so it just we needed that space to try to figure it out. So, yeah, we had.
Speaker 5:When we got home, the difficult conversation happened about what do we do? Do I seek treatment? Do we just let it go? Do we? And that's the first time I have ever been with my husband and see him weep about me and about where we are and what we needed to do as a couple? We don't have kids, you know, it's just us, we're all we got, and so it's one of those moments where you run to the Lord, not away, and I think that's the heart. You know a lot of people get angry and it's like, okay, I'm mad at you right now, god. But for me, I had to visualize running to him. It's the fight. I'm running into the fight, I'm not running away from the fight. And at that moment, with Tim, it became about Tim. I mean, it became about us, like we got to fight for each other. It's because it is we're not kids and we still talk about it's like dear lord, like who's going to change my diaper when I'm so something else I want to ask you.
Speaker 3:You know you still got a job, yeah right, what's going on back at the y while you're going through all this?
Speaker 5:well, first of all, I have an amazing staff. They're fantastic. Uh, they have, I really do. They are just phenomenal. And Butch Thompson is my operations manager and you know he's like what do you, what do we need to do? You just tell me, just let us know. And that the team was amazing. I didn't have to worry. I mean money. You know you always need to fundraise, you need to do it. So the staff number one is fantastic. Number two again the board.
Speaker 5:I cannot tell you how you're in a board meeting and somebody says we need to pray for Misty right now. You know that's, I mean, they would lay hands on. At one meeting they laid hands on me. Another meeting they prayed over me, the emails, the phone calls, the text, and it was. I have a board member, tom Carrico. He grew up in this community and he said it's about you. We got to get you healthy, cause we know if you're healthy, we'll be okay, too healthy. So, um, that's, that's that was their focus, is what we need to do to help you and we'll get through it. And they did. I mean, they've helped me, yeah, so it's, it's been amazing.
Speaker 3:Boy, if that doesn't tell you you're at the right spot you're at the right location, working and working with the right people in the right community, so to get rid of the cancer. What's the next stage?
Speaker 5:Well, um, there was. They did a lot of research. So, just to make it a little bit more complicated, the, your nerve system, flows from the top of our head down through our neck, across our chest, you know, and. And the lymphatic system is extremely important to our health, our body. And so they actually had to take it to a tumor board is what they call it at IU. And they had to analyze am, am I? Should they do surgery? Should they not do surgery? Let's, should we do the radiation first? So it was decided that surgery would be too dangerous because of where it was located, so it could create nerve issues in my face and my hands and my arms. So they determined let's go ahead. And they found out it was estrogen-based cancer. So put me on shots and put me on pills and then we started that first. And then I did six to seven weeks of radiation at Muncie, at IU, ball, and again, this community is amazing.
Speaker 5:You can drive like two weeks. You can do pretty good the first two weeks of treatment. The third week is when you start getting tired, and the treatment was in my neck and in my shoulder, so the neck part they had pretty much said you might be on a feeding tube, you're going to lose your voice. This is going to be a very difficult journey for you and I mean I believe in supplements. I take a lot of supplements, my diet. We changed my diet and, um, I didn't. I had like a couple of weeks where my voice was really soft spoken. I still have raspy issues with it, but we started the journey and again I, so I you think about that. That. How are we going to do this? So Tim's gonna have to take off time from work and driving me up there after those like four weeks, and it's every day. And I had friends call that were retired and and it wasn't how can I help? It was tell me when your appointments are and I'm gonna drive you. So I had a driver every day of the week. Volunteers drive me to Muncie for five weeks. It was amazing.
Speaker 5:And the issue with food like I couldn't really eat. So they started feeding Tim Like they would just drop food off for Tim. He didn't have to worry about food because that was me being so tired, I couldn't cook, I couldn't. So my routine was I was picked up at the at the house by eight 30,. Drive me up for treatment, be home. I'd taken about about a 20 minute, 30 minute nap and then I I worked every day. Except the last two weeks I worked from home, but I worked every day for about four hours. I'd go in for four hours, hard, difficult. But I wanted the staff I didn't want the staff to feel like I wasn't fighting, you know. I wanted them to see that I was fighting. I wanted the staff to know that I'm right here, not going anywhere. I might look horrible today, I might sound horrible today, but I'm right here.
Speaker 4:And so that was important to me to make sure I was there for them. You still got that 20 year old little girl at the chamber.
Speaker 3:That's amazing. So you, you go through all the treatments. The community's amazing. And we talked about this last week because I happened to go to a funeral, I think, the day before you and I met and, and just how important it is, I think you know. It's one thing when something happens to an individual or to a family, something tragic or a diagnosis of cancer, it's one thing to to reach out and say, hey, I'm here for you if you need anything. Or hey, I'm praying for you. It's another thing to lay hands on you and to pray with you. It's another thing to call you and say, once your appointment, I'm going to pick you up and I hope anyone listening out there I know we have a ton of great listeners, great people who care about individuals and about helping others, but I want you to think about that next time something happens to someone that you know, maybe somebody you don't know, instead of just saying how can I help, saying hey, when's the treatment? Yeah.
Speaker 3:I'm going to get you there. I'll be there on Monday. I think that that is super impactful and I think it's very important for people to hear, because I get caught in that too. You know, there's things that happen all the time and you say, hey, I'm here, you send a text, I'm here for you, let me know if I can help in any way.
Speaker 5:Yeah.
Speaker 3:Just do it.
Speaker 5:Yeah, it's very. You don't ask, it's hard. I have a friend right now that's going through treatment and she's driving. She's been driving herself for two weeks and I called her yesterday on her drive up and I said, how are you doing? She said today's hard.
Speaker 5:I'm like, well, from here on out, I mean, let me, I'm going to look at my schedule. I'm gonna do the same thing one day a week. I can't do five, but if I can do one. But you don't want to bother people, you don't want, as the patient, I don't want to have to say, dan, do you have time to help me? I don't want to do it because it's your fight, it's your journey, it's where? But you're right, when somebody calls or sends the text, when's your next appointment? And I, you know, I had pickleball people, I had Coddington's, kathy Rowland, I had Rachel Hughes, I mean Betty Blank, I mean I can go through the list of people that just gave of their time just to drive me and that allowed me to rest. It allowed me to. If I needed to do some work in the car, I could, but just letting me sit there and rest while they drove it's amazing it is.
Speaker 3:It is so. You get through those treatments. Now what?
Speaker 5:The longest wait ever. My last radiation treatment was December 6th and March. The end of March is when I had my PET scan. So apparently radiation works in your body three to six months. And so they still wanted it to settle. I was, I'm still taking the shots, I'm still taking the pills, that all was still happening and but they ended up having it at the end of March and my sister was with me and we walked in and I, frankly, I anticipated.
Speaker 5:The one thing I didn't say about this is it was in my rib. They found cancer in my eighth rib. They didn't know if it was in the tissue or the bone because it was so small. And they all agreed we have to focus on your lymph nodes first. So let's do that and your pec muscle and then we'll come back and focus on the ribs. So really, when my sister went with me and I thought we were just going to hear, I felt good about the lymph nodes because the swelling had gone down, I felt better, I wasn't in pain like I was, but I really didn't ever pray about the rib or think about the rib, because I expected her to say OK, we've done this, now we're going to focus on the rib. That was the plan.
Speaker 5:Well, so when she sat down and she looked at me and my sister and Tim was on the phone, he couldn't be with us. She said, well, I just I have great news. She said everything's clear. And I said the lymph nodes, right? She said no, everything. Are we the lymph nodes, right? She said no, everything. Are we sure been down this road before? Yeah, yeah, and she said she turned the report back over to me. She's like that's what it says.
Speaker 5:Okay, well, my sister is way high, more hyper than I am, and she's holding my hand and I'm like how is that possible? And she went what are you talking about? Like this is a miracle, what's wrong with you? She's barking at me, but it I, you know, I didn't ask for the rib, I didn't ask for healing in the rib, I didn't ask. So I was shown mercy and um, but it took me 24 hours because I really did not believe it. Because, you're right, I heard this before and I've got side effects. You know I, my eye still isn't normal. I'm worried about that. Still, I have lymphedema. I'm worried about that. Still, this doesn't seem like this is possible. And it took over 24 hours before I even posted anything on Facebook. I still worry, I still like is it possible? But um, but it is. I mean, the report is the report.
Speaker 3:As strong as you are in your faith. Why do you worry?
Speaker 5:I know right.
Speaker 3:What are you?
Speaker 5:afraid of.
Speaker 5:I see you're going to make me feel guilty and I'm going to have to have my own altar call here me feel guilty and I'm going to have to have my own altar call here. Thanks, dan, sorry, good Lord, oh, I know, and I feel bad about it. I mean, it's a circle of thank you Jesus, thank you Lord. Really, are you sure it's just a circle circle, and I, I think it still comes back to um that you know, five years ago, six years ago, and I think it's like, okay, I was told, but maybe I'm not, and I still that 20 you know it was 2 am in the bed and I was looking up at the ceiling and I'm thinking, okay, what other tests can we take? Well, the blood work shows, I'm fine, pet scan shows, I'm fine. So what else you get? An mri is not going to show anything. The pet skin's the best thing for cancer to look at. I'm like, okay, what else?
Speaker 5:And I just in my own guilt, or a voice in my own head, or the lord, whatever, however it was. It was like, if you can't believe that the machine, you can't believe the test, then you need to trust in God. Like this is another gift, accept it. So you're right. I mean, as strong as my faith is, I'm still in this cycle of like is it real? Is it real? Is it real? Is it real? My dad and if dad watches this, he'll be yelling at the screen, probably to say you're supposed to believe, believe, accept it. It's the healing.
Speaker 3:You're human yeah it is.
Speaker 5:But it's another opportunity God's given me and I know that I'm not done. I think you know my scripture, dad. Two things dad told me when I started the journey. The first time was journal, journal, journal whatever. If it's anger, if it's scare, if it's fear, whatever it is, you journal it, raw feelings, and then find one scripture that's your scripture that you hold on to. And mine was jeremiah. Jeremiah 29 11, for I know the plans I have for you. Right, I'm not going to harm you, um but I'm going to take care of you.
Speaker 5:And so I hold on. I held onto that scripture and that is my that. It's Angela McDaniel. She is a friend of ours and she her son went through is is still going through, some illness, but she had that on a board and she delivered it to us and on the back of it it has. That was his and she passed it on to me and I'll be passing it on to somebody else someday, but right now I'm still holding it. It's still in my bedroom.
Speaker 4:That's pretty cool. That's your scripture, and and you know when you're, when you're there with your mom and you're breaking down on the recliner and your dad's friend calls you and prays for you what do you tell you about the plan? God's not done with you yet God's not done with you, so I have a plan for you. Then that's your scripture. That's just beautiful it is.
Speaker 5:I'm still here. I'm still kicking. Maybe not as energy level, it might not be as strong as it has been in the past, but we're still here and I'm grateful for the opportunity to still be here.
Speaker 3:Yes, yeah.
Speaker 5:What are you afraid of? I'm not afraid of dying. I mean, I've been faced with this, you know. I'm not afraid of dying, I'm afraid of not being with Tim, my husband. That's a. I know that's weird for me, I mean, but that day we had our very heart to heart conversation in that living room and it is just the two of us. It's like I don't, I'm not ready to let you go yet. I'm not ready. He, his words, were if this is God's way and you need to go, I understand it's not that I'm ready for it, but if this is what needs to happen, I understand. For me, I'm not there yet.
Speaker 5:I still look at him every day and I want to be with him. And when I was chasing him around the IU East campus and he wasn't wanting me to chase him anywhere it was really about I can't see my. You know, look down the road. I can't see my life with him not in it, and that, for me, is a big deal. So it's like, okay, I still, I'm 53. He's 61. There's still time. But I don't see my life without him in it. And our marriage is much different now than it was. You know, when you first get married, you're all excited and your heart goes pitter patter, pitter patter and in mine does, it just goes slow or pitter patter. So we're in a stage where he's my best friend and and we do life together. So that's what I'm afraid of. I wasn't ready, I'm not ready to let him go and I'm afraid that that time had come and I don't want it to be here.
Speaker 5:Um, so that yeah if that's what I'm, nothing else really scares me.
Speaker 3:That's powerful. It's a true love story. I mean really. You know everybody's. When you think of a love story, you think of this just beautiful, everything's perfect, but it's not, you know you're chasing him around at IU, right? He finally slows down and and and he falls in love, and you fall in love. You get to where the challenges of not being able to have children, yeah all in love.
Speaker 3:You get to where the challenges of not being able to have children, all the different challenges I mean, even though they were good opportunities to switch those jobs, there's still challenges right, it changes your life. You get the cancer diagnosis for the first time. You're clear, or you're told you're clear, and then you get it again and what do you say through the whole thing, you're not afraid of dying, you're afraid of leaving your house I know where I.
Speaker 5:I mean I'm with the lord, I mean he's my savior, and I mean this earth isn't the funnest place to be in sometimes right, you're.
Speaker 5:I mean, this doesn't give us their joy is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Those are choices, and waking up out of the bed every day is a choice. Like I'm getting out of bed, okay. Um, here we go. I'm reading the book. Let them have you read that. Yet it's a. It's a newer book that's out right now, and one of the things that she talked about the authors that she struggled at their most difficult time in their life, financially, just to get out of bed, and she started this routine of five, four, three, two, one go. You know that's how she would get herself out of bed every day. So I mean, but yeah, I, if it's my time to be with the Lord, I am good. But you're right, I'm just not ready to leave Tim yet.
Speaker 3:That's pretty awesome. All right, we're going to try to land this plane.
Speaker 5:You land it, you land it. It's been great to be with you guys.
Speaker 3:It's been great, but I got two final questions.
Speaker 5:Okay.
Speaker 3:If you could sit on a park bench and have a conversation with someone living or deceased who would it be and why?
Speaker 5:Thanks for giving me a heads up on this, because I think in different phases of your life it would be a different person. Right now, where I'm at, is my great grandmother First female to be licensed to be a preacher in the UPC church, had breast cancer and survived in a time that. I don't know how she survived, but she did, and she was a prayer warrior. Like I would come home from school. That's where we'd go, was her house and she was on the floor on her face and that's how she prayed and you would hear out loud. So I think I would love to sit down with her and talk about her adversities, her challenges, because I know she had faith challenges too. So how did she get? She was just my great grandma then, but now I'd really want to dig into all that with her. So that's where I would be today.
Speaker 3:That's a great answer. You've already given us a bible verse, but maybe is there another bible verse or a quote. When you're just down and out, when you're you're questioning god, when you're questioning everything that's going on the doctors and nurses and all those things, those challenges that you face, is there a bible verse, is there a quote that you lean on?
Speaker 5:well, the bible verse I still lean on is jeremiah 29, 11. But I I would. So I'm a visual person. It has, everything has to be visual. I mean I have to have it goals on a chart in my office. I have to. You know, pictures help me. And that visual for me is still running to him, like running to him not away but to, and even in my prayer time. Okay, god, I'm running to him, not away but to, and even in my prayer to him. Okay, god, I'm running to you. You're going to have to lift me up, pull me across, and you've heard, you know the footprints of you know I've I carried you the whole way.
Speaker 5:You look back and you see two footprints and those are mine. I'm carrying you and so I think that that's where I have to see it. That's where I have to visualize that every day I'm not alone. There's people around me. But for my walk with the Lord and owning that relationship now is it's all about me and him.
Speaker 3:Amazing.
Speaker 4:Ben, you got anything to add? No, I just keep. I don't know. This whole thing was just amazing. I mean your faith. I feel like the people that are listening that maybe you know aren't strong in their faith or maybe don't know where to start. I feel like, wherever we are, we always get back to the same thing of you know, you feel that doubt and you know in the Bible he talks about I forget what, you know what scripture it is, but they talk about that doubt that you have where he's like. Well, if you believe, and well wait, can you feel my unbelief? Right, jesus, can you feel my?
Speaker 5:unbelief.
Speaker 4:Yeah, exactly, and and and help me in that way. And what happened? He still healed him, right. So I feel like we all have that unbelief and stuff sometimes, but you just ask God to help us with that and I just feel like it's so beautiful. You know you're, you're raised in faith, but you still, you know, when you start going through those challenges, you, you grow stronger in the relationships, right, like we can know the stories, know all this, but it's our stories, like we are that testimony, like each one of us has a testimony, the whole point of our, our podcast and just your testimony is so powerful and and you know
Speaker 5:the relationship with Jesus and your faith is just. It's awesome. Well it's. I don't want anybody to have to go through what I went through, and maybe I'm just hardheaded and God had to catch my attention in a different way than others.
Speaker 5:I don't know, but it's still about you have to. It has to be real for you and it has to your walk. You've gone through that. Both of you have have where it's yours. I mean you have to, it has to be yours and whatever what life brings to us, you know we'll get through it. Yeah, I appreciate. I appreciate this. I appreciate the opportunity for you to let me share I appreciate you being vulnerable, yeah well, I'm definitely vulnerable today and what'd you say?
Speaker 3:you came in here. I don't have a story.
Speaker 5:I know I've watched all your podcasts. I'm like I told my husband last night oh my Lord, I am not one of these people. But if it'll help somebody, hopefully it helps somebody today 100%.
Speaker 3:Well, misty, we thank you for sharing your incredible journey. Battles you've faced, but the light you continue to shine through your service, your leadership and your faith. Your story is a reminder that even in life's darkest moments, we can rise, we can serve and we can lead with purpose. On behalf of Ben and I and Kevin here, with Be Tempered and everyone listening, I thank you for the impact you've made and continue to make in this community. We're better because of people like you.
Speaker 5:Thank you guys. I appreciate y'all. Thank you.
Speaker 3:If somebody wants to connect with you social media website, how can they get in touch with you? All those good things.
Speaker 5:Yeah, Um well, I work at the Y, so they're welcome to call there. But um, mistyhollis at yahoocom is my email. You can reach out to me that way too.
Speaker 3:I'm on. I'm on Misty D's Hollis on Facebook Instagram. There you go, absolutely there you go. I would encourage you to reach out to Misty. She's as you've heard. Uh, you still got that Southern twang.
Speaker 5:A little bit, a little bit.
Speaker 3:What an awesome story there's. There's someone out there that needs to hear this. There's one person there's more than one person out there that needs to hear this. There's one person, there's more than one person out there, but there's so many that are going to be impacted by your story. So everybody continue to like and to share. We appreciate all the love and support that we continue to get with the podcast and we'll keep this thing rolling into year number two. Go out and be tempered.
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