BeTempered
We believe that everyone has the potential to achieve greatness, and that the key to unlocking this potential is through personal development. Our podcasts are designed to help you cultivate the skills and mindset you need to achieve your goals and live the life you want.
BeTempered
BeTempered Episode 71 – Inside Shawn Ruebush’s New Book 'Turning Pain into Purpose'
What does it take to transform your deepest pain into purpose? Shawn Ruebush knows firsthand. After first sharing his life story on Episode 24 of the BeTempered podcast with hosts Dan Schmidt and Ben Spahr, Shawn took the courageous step of writing his memoir, Turning Pain into Purpose—a raw, unflinching account of tragedy, struggle, and ultimate redemption.
Shawn’s journey began with unimaginable trauma at just eleven years old, an event that forever altered the course of his life. For decades, he wrestled with destructive behaviors while silently carrying the weight of his past. Though he felt a persistent call to share his story, fear kept him silent—until his moment of vulnerability on the podcast became the catalyst for profound change.
The writing process itself became part of Shawn’s healing. With no formal writing background (and even calling himself a “D” student in English), he poured his heart into a manuscript completed in just two months. Financial hurdles nearly stopped the project, but Shawn’s conviction to follow obedience over comfort pushed him forward. “God has given you a gift. Use it,” he reflects, a phrase that captures the essence of his transformation.
Shawn also shared two powerful milestones that shaped his growth: completing the intense 75 Hard challenge and being baptized as an adult. Both represent his deeper commitment to discipline, faith, and authentic living. In a moving moment, his daughter Haven joins the conversation, showing the ripple effect of Shawn’s transformation on his family.
His story echoes a truth from C.S. Lewis: “You can’t go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the ending.” Shawn proves that our darkest struggles can become our most powerful testimonies when we find the courage to share them.
👉 Ready to be inspired?
Listen now, then grab a copy of Shawn’s book Turning Pain into Purpose: https://books.by/shawnruebush/turning-pain-into-purpuse
And if you’d like to support more stories like this, join us on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/betempered
Hi, my name is Allie Schmidt. This is my dad, Dan. He owns Catron's Glass.
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Speaker 1:Kitchen's class, the clear choice.
Speaker 3:Hey, do you want to catch every episode live as it's being recorded? Log on to patreoncom slash betempered for exclusive footage, behind the scenes photos and a live recording as it takes place. Go to patreoncom slash be tempered. Welcome to the Be Tempered podcast, where we explore the art of finding balance in a chaotic world.
Speaker 4:Join us as we delve into insightful conversations, practical tips and inspiring stories to help you navigate life's ups and downs with grace and resilience.
Speaker 3:We're your host, dan Schmidt and Ben Spahr. Let's embark on a journey to live our best lives. This is Be Tempered. What's up everybody. Welcome to the Be Tempered podcast, episode number 71,. Dan, thank you.
Speaker 4:Ben, you're welcome, sir. Why'd you say it that way? Just very confident, and then you know, just letting everybody know I know how to do my job.
Speaker 3:Sometimes we wanted to bring you back on because, um, you wrote a book, dude, like you, you wrote a book, your life story. If you're watching on YouTube or on Patreon, you can. You can see a copy of the book here. Uh, kevin's got it up on the screen. You can see it, and it's now available for purchase on Amazon and through Sean's website, which we'll have all linked to all these episodes and to our website. But you know, we wanted to bring you on here one to talk about that, to talk about what it was like for you writing the book. All those feelings, all those emotions. You know all those things, so you know getting into it.
Speaker 3:I read the book last week, gave it to me on Sunday. I went home about two and a half hours, got through it. I couldn't put it down. It's 140, some pages.
Speaker 3:It gets pretty detailed in a lot of your story, things that I didn't think about, things that I didn't think about, things that I didn't understand. But when you encompass that with the total picture of your story, it makes a lot of things make sense to me and so it's powerful. I encourage everyone to go out and get it and to read it. But what I want to ask you, sean, is I want to you know, we go back to episode 24, the Be Tempered podcast when you came on here and you shared your story for the first time and essentially your life, right, the full story From that point to where you are today. I want you to talk about the manifestation that grew in you to get to that time and then what it took from that point until now to actually write the book. Talk about that process. Talk about your mindset, the challenges, all those things that you went through.
Speaker 5:Wow, that's a long question. Wow, again, god has put this on me for a long time and I wasn't being obedient to God. Like he gave me a story. He gave me a story to tell, um, and I felt that for a long time and I wasn't telling it. And it all goes back to, I think, god putting a podcast on your heart to do. And that's where, like I said that one day you told me on that football practice field that you're doing a podcast, I knew that was the. I knew that was the avenue that I was going to go. It may have taken me, you know, another 20 weeks to reach out and do it, but telling the story on the podcast again, we've talked. I've talked about this. It was that release off of me. It allowed people to approach me about it, so that was great. And then the thoughts I've always had in my head was confirmed by you Write it, get it on pages or get it on paper.
Speaker 5:So I mean, it's just the process that I've always had in my mind. I just didn't know how to do it. And then God puts things on people's hearts to force you to do it. And I mean that Like if you had asked me two years ago how I wrote a book, I literally would have bet every penny in my bank account that I would have never done this Ever. And I still feel like you already know what I'm going to say. You said something so ridiculously a week ago that I'm mad at you for it, Because you put that thought in my head. Is that something I should do? But I believe God had a plan for me and his timing's perfect, and that's what this is about. It was extremely hard going back and rereading what I wrote on paper, but I did it.
Speaker 3:How long did it take you?
Speaker 5:Two months, two months, remember. I've been thinking about this for a long time. I knew the way I wanted it to flow. I just didn't. I've never wrote anything, if you know me. I literally got a D in English from Mrs Freeman's class. We were not nice to that lady, we were a terrible class.
Speaker 3:I wasn't in that class, no, but I know there's a lot of people who was going to listen to this and be like, yeah, we were kind of.
Speaker 5:I never paid attention. In English I still, to this day, anyone that knows me and writes email, thank gosh for autocorrect, but I don't know, I can't believe it. Like staring looking at this book. It's almost surreal. And like staring looking at this book, it's almost surreal. The people that, like Jason, if Jason Koger didn't come on this podcast, that book may not be here either, Because Jason is the one who referred Karen to help me write it.
Speaker 5:I met Karen, I showed her what I had and she immediately said I'm going to help you. I want to help you. God's telling me to help you. Talk about Karen. Karen's awesome. She read my. I sent her what I had in Excel form, sent it to her. She read it. She says I don't know how we're going to do it, but I'm I'm going to help you do this, because the money issue was a huge problem at the beginning for me. It cost a lot of money to write a book if you don't know how to do it and I needed help. I realized that Karen was awesome, man, the way the process worked. She would read it. She read it. She wrote down her notes. We would do a zoom call. She'd ask me questions and I mean we just become for that. I mean it was just great getting an outside perspective, and she's not necessarily a big football fan, Right.
Speaker 1:She loves golf.
Speaker 5:So her reading and understanding the football lingo was fun for me because she was like what's a three and out and I'd have to explain that to her. What's a punt? It was just cool just getting to know somebody and that type of thing with her. And yeah, man, it was awesome. And then she recommended Casey Parker, who owns her own company that designed the cover. Working with her was amazing. She formatted it and I know she probably was. I mean, they all were very gracious of how ignorant I was on how to write a book. I would ask them, probably in their profession, such a basic question. They're like this is how you do it. So, but they were all gracious, they all were awesome, amazing and it all comes back to the plan that God had. You know, me knowing I needed to put it on paper. You doing the podcast, me trusting you, you bringing Jason on here. Jason recommended Karen, Karen recommended Casey, and then this is where we're at. It's pretty awesome it's amazing.
Speaker 3:You know who called me last night Karen.
Speaker 5:Jason, jason.
Speaker 3:Yeah, jason called me. I told him the book's out, he's excited to uh to get a copy. And uh, he said to tell you he's proud of you for going through it and for doing it and for sharing a story. And you know, I want to go back you. You mentioned the money thing and that reminded me of a conversation you and I had. Yep, do you remember that conversation?
Speaker 5:I'll never forget that conversation.
Speaker 3:Why don't you talk about it? And you don't have to put the numbers out. I don't really.
Speaker 5:It doesn't matter to me, but uh, it kind of reminds me a little bit of Brian when he came on here and God put on his heart to start that um nonprofit with the horses. Yeah, I remember Brian saying and this sums it up like you can't afford not to do it. Again, it goes back to me being obedient to what God called me to do. And that's weird for me to say, and it's uncomfortable, but for 40-some years I've ignored it. It's time to say, and it's uncomfortable, but for 40 some years I've ignored it. It's time to stop ignoring it and embrace it and move forward. But yes, it was. Karen was so gracious and.
Speaker 5:I appreciate her so much for letting me make payments that's all I'll say. Because, without her doing that this book's not sitting here, so thank you, Karen.
Speaker 1:Yeah, thank you, and I asked Dan.
Speaker 5:Your response was hilarious. I asked Dan. I was like man, is this worth it? He goes, you're an idiot. I was like you know how much money I spend on this podcast just to get people's stories out, and I was like oh, and I just was like oh, and I just like that's exactly what I needed to hear.
Speaker 3:So, yes, I remember it. Yeah, good, I remember too. Yeah, you remember you reaching out and saying, hey, it's going to cost this much. I'm like so, like so, are you doing it for money? You know, is that? Is that the? Is that the hangup? Are you going to listen and make it work? And, and you did, and it's, and it's, it's awesome? What advice would you have for somebody out there who wants to, um, to do what you did and put their put their story on paper? How, how would somebody get started?
Speaker 5:Um, just start writing. Just start writing. I didn't. A lot of times I talked into my phone and then I copied it over to Word and kind of did it that way, but just start writing. I mean again, I know when I say it only took me about two months to do, but you got to remember this has been on my mind for a long time, so I knew exactly what I wanted to say and how I when I say it only took me about two months to do, but you got to remember like this has been on my mind for a long time, so I knew exactly what I wanted to say and how I wanted to say it and how I wanted to come across.
Speaker 3:Who, would you hope, reads this book?
Speaker 5:A kid who has went through the fire like we talk about all the time, has went through the fire like we talk about all the time. A person who doesn't necessarily believe in God, anybody who's ever been through any type of tragedy, divorce, anything. I keep going back to that John 13, 7 that Jason says I never understood why God put me through all that. Now I do, and this is why, this is the why, and it was worth every ounce of pain and everything it was worth it.
Speaker 3:That's awesome.
Speaker 5:Hey, by the way, the best writing in this book is from the guy that wrote the foreword. Do you know what Karen said about what you wrote in the forward? She said I would not change one word of that. So thank you, yeah, um, that, that part gets me a lot. So thank you for doing that. Yeah, so funny story is, dan. When we talked about writing, when I talked about writing this book, dan goes hey, I want to write your foreword. You remember my response? No, I was like watch that.
Speaker 5:I do remember now and I was like I don't even know what that is, and you're like, well, it's kind of like the introduction, and I was like, oh. And then I went and Googled what before? Just to confirm, just to confirm, just to confirm, not that I didn't trust you, but I wanted to get the full version of the definition of a forward. Yeah, so yeah that tells you about my writing experience. So if a kid from Preble County who got a D in English can write a book, believe me, anyone can I mean you can.
Speaker 4:What was that teacher's name again?
Speaker 5:I don't even know.
Speaker 4:Miss Freeman. Shout out, Miss Freeman, because now you have taught someone English that has published a book. So shout out to you, Miss Freeman.
Speaker 5:And I apologize on all of 1996 as graduating class.
Speaker 3:That wasn't our class, we were 97.
Speaker 5:Oh, 97. See, I think, football, holy cow man 96. We were going to ask you history class Early onset dementia. Sean.
Speaker 3:I'm going to read another passage here. I've highlighted a lot of stuff in this book, but there's a couple of things that I wanted to read, and you know I started actually, what I started reading was from near the end of the book, and um, you started at the end.
Speaker 3:I started at the end and that's what I read at the beginning of the podcast. Um, because I I think that last chapter for me like you're, I know your story right, unbelievable story but I think that last chapter for me really captured who you are now, who you're moving to be, and that's where I really felt a lot of things. But you know, this goes back to the beginning of the book and I'm not reading the whole book here, I'm just reading parts of it because I just want to give everybody a taste of the feel for it. So there might come a moment in your life when everything you know is ripped away from you. You might lose people you love, suffer heartbreak or tragedy and experience pain that doesn't seem fair. You'll ask why? Me? You look for answers that don't come. But here's what I've learned by walking through the fire Pain isn't the end of your story, it's the beginning of something greater. I believe that every struggle, every ounce of suffering is preparing you for something bigger. You might not see it now, you might not understand why things are happening the way they are, but one day it will all make sense. John 13, 7 says you don't realize now what I'm doing, but later you will understand that's from the introduction. That's a powerful way to come out of the gate.
Speaker 3:So you know, with the book you've been on this growing process. Really I know you've been going through it for the past four or five years, but what I've seen, what we've, where we've came back into um contact with each other and and, uh, spending a lot of time with each other talking and texting and all those things I've seen tremendous growth from you since episode 24 to where we are today. And there's a couple things that happen. One we talked about it on one of the other episodes where I challenged you to 75 hard. You completed that. I'd like you to talk about that. And then also you got baptized. So I want to talk about those two things because, though your story is 46 years old, you know 46 of your you're 46 years old now. I think you're just getting started, man. So talk about you know you finished the book. You do 75 hard. Talk about that, and then talk about going into being baptized.
Speaker 5:Okay, so I wrote my part of the book and, like I said, I did it in two, two and a half months and I did it all in my spare time, you know, and the timing was perfect, you know I wasn't coaching football at the time. So I just, you know, I just dove into it, just reckless abandonment, just dove into it and got it done. And the funny thing is about I remember completing it, talking to Karen, sending her an email, and I remember like, well now, and I remember that being on a Wednesday or a Thursday, and so I remember I didn't have my kids that weekend and it was a Friday night or something. And I'm just, you know, I just spent two and a half months diving into this book and I'm like, what's next? Just what's next. So then I remember getting on a video game Xbox. I haven't played video games forever and I remember playing, just wasting time on a video game, and I played Saturday Haven had a tournament, volleyball tournament. That Sunday I sent out something to Dan in our group text about discipline and then Captain Bully over here challenged me to 75 hard that day. We all remember the group text and I'm not going to lie. You already know how I feel, but I wanted to understand the leadership and how important having good men in your lives are, because look what I started to do. Not by all means video games are not terrible, but they do, in my opinion, waste a lot of time and I've wasted a lot of time on them and I love them. I absolutely love playing video games, um, but I've wasted years of my life on them too. So I started back into that and then it just goes back to God putting that on Dan. To be honest, we've had a conversation about that. I asked Dan. I was like, well, like why he goes? I just hear this voice or whatever. It was just to be honest with me and I'm just going to be hard on you and be honest, and that's what I need. And I remember starting 75 hard angrily.
Speaker 5:I was in a volleyball tournament for Haven and I remember reading that, yeah, I forget, I forget which tournament was, but it was an indoor, clearly an indoor tournament. But it was raining outside and I started. I downloaded the app that day and the first thing I saw was 45 minute walk in or 40 to 45 minute workouts and I'm like I'm doing one right now in between a game. I just hit the clock and just started, just started walking and it was pouring rain outside the entire day, so I'm like, all right read, I did all of it. The last thing from day one was the outdoor. I had to do an outdoor walk and I didn't get home till eight o'clock and and it was pouring rain and I went and I walked in my woods for 45 minutes and it changed my life.
Speaker 5:One 45-minute walk in the rain changed my life and I got addicted to it. And now I'm coaching football. When I don't get that time for myself, I can feel myself drifting. So I'm with justin. The water is the worst part of it. Um, I hate the water in 75 hard, but you just just do it, man, so yeah, so that's a long answer for the 75 hard program that's good. That's why I started it was because I was lost.
Speaker 5:I didn't know what else was next. You made me mad and I love when people make me mad because fuel it's fuel. I've always used it for fuel. I've used everything for fuel. I had a buddy tell me that I wasn't going to sell any books.
Speaker 4:You said a buddy yeah.
Speaker 5:I don't know if he meant it in a hateful way, I really don't know. But I had a guy say man, why are you doing that you ain't going to sell any books? All right, watch me. Oh, say man, why are you doing that you ain't going to sell any books? All right, watch me. Oh well, they hadn't heard what I said to them. I don't think I should repeat. No, it fired me up. Yeah, yeah Again, it's what I needed.
Speaker 3:So, yeah, and here's what I'll tell you I despise video games and I played them in college, I played them in high school and they're fun. I mean, my kids play some but I despise them. And that was the trigger when when I don't know if you said something or something came up about video games and I was like, dude, how are you going to talk about discipline, how are you going to coach high school kids, push discipline on them, and you're going to sit in front of your TV for however many hours and play video games? That was the trigger for me. And I and I just heard a voice just say let him have it. Let him have it. And I'm going to be honest with you, sean, I hear that a lot. I hear that voice in my head a lot about you. Let him have it, he can take it. That's what he needs, that's what pushes him, that's what drives him, that's what motivates him, that's what makes him do what he needs to be doing.
Speaker 3:So I don't know why that I hear that about you, but I do. I don't hear it about many people, um, because I don't think many people could take it and the old Sean would have punched me in the mouth. But there's, there's a new sheriff in town. So, um, I I'm glad that you went through 75 hard and it it's an. It's an amazing program. A mental toughness program. It's not, you know it. It does become a physical thing, right? I mean, you're sore, you're hurting. Two workouts a day suck, it's everything that you would think as far as difficulty goes. But what comes from it on the backside, the mental aspect of it, it's the reason that we're sitting here.
Speaker 3:It's the reason that you're sitting here. It's the reason you are part of our team at Catrons. I mean 100%. My life changed three years ago when Jeff Swanson introduced 75 Hard to me. That's when my life changed, Not when I started it, when I completed it. When I started it, when I completed it and uh, anybody out there who's, you know, stuck in a rut. This is your way out. It's not easy, but it but it's your way out. So you know, with all that being said, you complete 75 hard and you and I can tell, I know that you did it right because you've already made the comment that you can feel yourself slipping back into. You know certain routines that you don't like and you recognize that, but I know what's going to happen. You know when, when you get, when football is done, when you're done coaching here this season, you're going to hop back on the wagon and you're going to. You're going to do it again how do you know that?
Speaker 4:because I literally thought that Because if not you're going to get a text one day and it's going to be like what are you doing?
Speaker 3:And I'm going to come over and I'm going to Wait. You started phase two you dork.
Speaker 4:That's not as good a sound like there's going to be a voice in that head of his.
Speaker 3:Need to tell Sean. All right, so from that a couple of weeks ago maybe a month ago now, I don't remember how long ago it was, but you sent a text to us, to Ben and I, that you were getting baptized. Talk about that.
Speaker 5:What led to that? Well, I was baptized when I was seven or eight years old, but it didn't mean anything to me when I was seven or eight years old, but it didn't mean anything to me. So ever since I've been divorced, I've just wanted to do this and I've put it off for so long. And I've asked a few people this, that and the other about hey, you know, I want to get baptized. But here's the thing about me. I don't. Here's what I told them. I don't want to do it in front of people, like like that. That was my thought process, like I just want to be quiet over here in the corner by myself. God said nope, so that's why all those plans fell through. So I believe I mean I don't know how many people were there- there's a lot.
Speaker 5:There's a lot of people there. Again, it's about being obedient and Pastor Eric at Church of Faith here in Richmond. They talked about a baptism. I skipped the first one.
Speaker 1:Why I don the first?
Speaker 5:one, why? I don't know why, I honestly don't know why Were you afraid? I don't know I wasn't afraid, I don't know why. I just maybe I wasn't ready mentally. I don't know why. I just maybe I wasn't ready mentally. I don't know why. But I just remember, you know, sitting in church and they were talking about, hey, we're having a baptism this week, and I remember, like I need to do that, and then my flesh said nope, and so I didn't. And then, you know, I just kept going to church, kept going to church and then Eric was like we're having a baptism in New Paris, at a. Why can I not think?
Speaker 5:of that Today's Harvest, today's Harvest, and I'm like okay. And then I asked my family, I asked Chase Haven Hunter and, uh, so we do it. I decided on a Tuesday to do it and, um, I talked to pastor Eric, who calls which I think this is amazing, but he calls everybody that's getting baptized and just kind of knows their story. And I told him my story and he was what everybody that hears my story. I gave him the quick 20 minute version and he was like I don't think it surprised him, but it kind of did. And he just poured into me for 20 minutes. Man. Just poured into me for 20 minutes, man.
Speaker 5:And, uh, he, he asked me why, what Jesus was to me, and I said he saved my life, he saved all of our lives. So, and I talked about that, which I don't think I can talk about that right now, I just I, I would lose everything, the podcast would end, um. But he reassured me, he told me what it meant, he asked all the right questions, he made it feel comfortable and he, and he told me he's like Sean, your old Sean is dead. The new Sean is a tool for God. He's going to use you as a tool and just let him and I said okay, it's about being obedient, so why did I choose that time?
Speaker 5:It's time. It's time for me to be bold in my faith, and I've hidden from. I've hidden from that for so long. That's the truth. I hear. You have voices in your head, we all do. All I hear is be obedient, and that's what I'm going to do. And what I find absolutely phenomenal and heartwarming is the people that showed up for the baptism. I never expected it. And heartwarming is the people that showed up for the baptism. I never expected it. I actually got three or four texts from angry friends that I didn't tell them. When I posted that on Facebook, they were like why didn't you tell me how to come?
Speaker 1:I'm like who does that?
Speaker 5:I'm not going to promote my own baptism. I told you guys because I mean you're my close friends, you're the only two people I told. Well, justin, I told Justin and his dad and mom showed up, which was extremely heartwarming. Joe Swartzel is a true man of God that I love to death.
Speaker 3:Do you remember what he told you after you were baptized? He gave you a hug. You remember what he said? He said baptized.
Speaker 5:He gave you a hug. Do you remember what he said? He said the devil's going to come for me. The devil can't touch me. Yeah, he can't put me through anymore. And I say that, but like I've been through, it.
Speaker 3:What did you feel when you were baptized, when the water was rushing across your head?
Speaker 5:What did you feel? A warmth. Everybody said the water was cold. I felt this warmth come over me. Peace I felt peace. And what was special about the baptism is I went first and my son went second.
Speaker 4:It's powerful.
Speaker 5:It's awesome. Someone else is going to get baptized soon.
Speaker 4:She just didn't want to do it in front of people either but, I understand, I understand it's a big, it's a big step, but and you know, the first time you I mean, and honestly, it's that voice that you said you heard, that voice that keeps saying be obedient, be obedient, be obedient. I mean, there's also that other voice that's in all of us that tries to get us not to do things like that. You know, and that's what we could battle every single day. But when you get baptized, man, it's just something completely different. And then you talk about the friends and family that want to come support you in the baptism. It's because they've probably been baptized and they know what it feels like and they know the new Sean.
Speaker 5:That was the biggest surprise to me, like I never, I mean, and there was a lot of people there that came up and gave me hugs. I mean, my neighbor, chris, is amazing. Jason, a guy that used to work for me when I was at Love's, was there. And Jason, a guy that used to work for me when I was at Love's, was there. I've never experienced love like that and that's why it's emotional, that's why it's heartwarming, that's why it's overwhelming for a person like me.
Speaker 3:Because I'm not used to that. You didn't have that growing up.
Speaker 5:But you got it. Now I've had it the whole time I just didn't realize it. Everybody does. It's just you don't realize how much God loves you and Jesus loves you until you understand what Jesus did on that cross for all of us. Once you understand that it's easy to receive love and give a love because you look at our lives and how comfortable we are and what that man went through and it's. And what that man went through and it's.
Speaker 3:Yeah, hey, Haven, Can you step up to the mic back there? So we've got Sean's daughter Haven here.
Speaker 1:And we'll adjust the mic.
Speaker 5:She's got her dad's height. Hey, she's going to be way taller than me, probably, hopefully.
Speaker 1:Haven. What do you think? I don't know.
Speaker 3:You can't give the typical kid answer.
Speaker 4:Let me ask you this Wait, that was three words, though.
Speaker 3:That was.
Speaker 5:I don't know.
Speaker 4:We're improving here.
Speaker 5:IDNK, I'm surprised you didn't say that.
Speaker 3:All right, here's a better question what does your dad mean to you?
Speaker 1:Everything.
Speaker 3:Why is that? What do you see in your dad that other people might not see yet?
Speaker 1:Goofiness and kindness.
Speaker 5:You're a mean person, man.
Speaker 3:Your dad's a special man. I think you know that, you recognize that, and he, you know he's been through a lot. I know you guys have been through a lot, but he's a special man. If you could, if you could tell him one thing right now, what would you tell him?
Speaker 1:That I love him.
Speaker 3:That's awesome what do you? Think.
Speaker 5:I love her too. I love all my children.
Speaker 3:It's pretty awesome. It's so amazing for me to watch this transformation because I've known you since you were a kid. We competed on the field together on the diamond on the basketball court. You know, I remember you being in the hospital after your accident. I remember seeing you doing some crazy things. I remember seeing you knock some people out I mean, there was, you know. But it's unbelievable for me to see the transformation, to see the transformation, knowing all that you've been through. And, dude, you wrote a book.
Speaker 3:Sean Rubish wrote a book. It's amazing. It continues to add to your story of it doesn't matter what you've been through, how dark or how deep it was in your life, that you can do anything, and I hope that's what people gain from your story. I know it is. I, I've I've heard it enough, uh, from other people who have, who've listened to the podcast and and I you're going to be overwhelmed with people that read the book and I'm going to end this with one last reading that you know you've got some good quotes in here. I've got to find it. That you know you put at the top of each chapter and I think this summarizes you.
Speaker 3:It's from CS Lewis. It says you can't go back and change the beginning, but you can start where you are and change the end. You started where you're at. You can't change what happened, right. You can't change all the things you went through as an 11-year-old boy, the challenges you went through on your various jobs and alcohol, and just all the things you've been through in your life. You can't change that and you don't want to change that. But you can start where you're at and you can change that. But you can start where you're at and you can change that ending and I think that summarizes this book. It summarizes your life and I'm extremely excited to see where we go from here. For sure you got anything to add.
Speaker 4:Yeah, quick question. So you talk about when you first, you know, when we first had you on the podcast and you told your story and you talked about how you knew that when dan started the podcast and he asked you that this was going to be the time right, was it the vulnerability of dan telling his story that made you feel like this was the platform to do it, or what? What was that feeling?
Speaker 1:that gave you like this? Is it like you knew it? Or what was that feeling that gave you like this? Is it?
Speaker 4:Like you knew that you had it all in you. You knew you wanted to tell it. What gave you that confidence to come on here and tell it Trust.
Speaker 5:Trust and Dan. It all goes back to and this is why football is important for the youth Like when you go through football and you go through all of that stuff with individuals, there's a bond that will never be taken away from you. There's a he. He was my offensive, he was you played left tackle, left guard. One of those I don't know that's for right guard, right guard really, really impacted.
Speaker 3:you Couldn't pay him on the blind side.
Speaker 5:Yeah, I know, no kidding, I was your right guard.
Speaker 4:Okay.
Speaker 5:Makes sense. But that's why Because I've you know trust was the biggest thing, like when we went through that bond in football two days. You know the six years we spent together. Like that means something. And I've always looked up to you, dan, you know with your business and how you conduct yourself and you know your everyday life and your family and your dad is an amazing person, your brother's great I just it came down to respect and trust and I trusted that you would handle my story the right way, you would do it the right way and that's, I think that was the biggest hurdle of like I'm not the guy this is going to sound weird, but I'm not the guy that'll go online and just promote me Like that's.
Speaker 5:I mean anyone who ever looks at my Facebook. I was one of those guys that would just scroll through and never post ever, because that was super uncomfortable for me. Because that was super uncomfortable for me. So trusting you with my story was 100% the factor of like this is it. And when I heard you say that, I mean there's all kinds of voices in my head like yes, this is it. But then again I still still. Look how long it took me another, I think you told me on your sixth episode, I think, because I went back and I looked that day I was like there was six, one, six, and then I looked at the first one I was like maybe this isn't the avenue.
Speaker 3:That's pretty bad, I agree. Hey, everybody's got to start somewhere.
Speaker 5:God loves the humble beginnings, right. So I mean that's why it was Trust.
Speaker 4:I just when you go back to the beginning of, like your first time telling it, and then we do this, you know the second, and then we do the live, like if you go back and you have time to listen to all those, you can see the faith journey happening in those podcasts and to see where you're at right now. Man, it just it's awesome. I'm so proud of you and I you know and that's what Dan talks about the transformation that he was blessed enough to see, right Like since you guys were little, have that brotherhood with you and I'm just lucky enough to be able to see you tell your story and then see almost like the peace that's come over you and then just you killing it in life. Man, I mean it's awesome.
Speaker 5:And then just you killing it in life, man, I mean it's awesome. I think me telling my story accelerated it, yeah For sure. And also just I mean go back and look at the first episode compared to the second episode, to probably this episode with my weight.
Speaker 4:Yeah Well that's what I was about to say. You can't tell that you're in football season and not hitting the two workouts a day. Thank you, You're looking good brother.
Speaker 5:Thank you, I've lost. I was always on a health journey before I started 75 hard. Well, somewhat. I started back in mid-January just trying to start eating healthy, but once again I got up to 200 pounds. I'm 5'7".
Speaker 3:What are you? 4'2", 4'2" or sorry?
Speaker 5:5' See everybody.
Speaker 4:He's a bully. I'm just messing. I know you are Go out and be tempered.
Speaker 5:But I was mid-January. I was almost 200 pounds, I'm 160 now. I lost about 10 pounds before I started 75 hard and 75 hard just accelerated it and it brought me to fasting a little bit. I did a three-day fast in the middle of 75 hard.
Speaker 3:Three days.
Speaker 5:Yeah, tried it again about two weeks ago and I made it 41 hours and I about died. I literally, literally walked out of the meeting. I got up, walked out of the meeting and said I, I got to go and I had literally went across the gas station and just shoved a bunch of sugar, jug food and junk food in my mouth. I I don't know why that first three day, the first time I did it, once I got past the hunger part, I was working out. Maybe that's the difference.
Speaker 5:I haven't been able to work out when I was with football, yeah, but I felt great at the end of three days. I literally felt amazing and I know this sounds weird, but the longer I went, the more energy I had to like I had energy out there. I was just full of energy, very productive, and I was doing the two workouts. They were awesome and I was lifting more weight than ever and I was lifting more weight than ever and my workouts went from 45 minutes to like I could easily go an hour and 15 without batting an eye. And then, but yeah, I mean, I think the difference when I tried to three-day fast this time is I wasn't doing the workouts and the hunger, just got me.
Speaker 3:Yeah Well, and you're just in a different mental state when you're in the program.
Speaker 5:You are a hundred percent, you're locked in.
Speaker 3:Um. So any anything you want to close with that, you want to leave our listeners that we didn't talk about.
Speaker 5:Uh, just for the longest time, man, I've chase. Chase your purpose, man, like I think God has given everybody a gift and.
Speaker 5:I think so. When I was doing 75 hard, I listened to David Goggins a lot. So when I was doing 75 Hard, I listened to David Goggins a lot and the story he tells about and this hit me like a ton of bricks. He tells a story I think it was Joe Rogan where he's like watch, your biggest fear and his biggest fear was when David Goggins goes to heaven. There's a big board up there and he's, you know, god's in front of him and Jesus and all that. And it says you know, navy SEAL changed millions of people's lives and this, that and the other.
Speaker 5:And David Goggins was like, well, I think I told it wrong, but that expectation that God has for you in the life, that like if I got up there and it says you know whatever it says about me and I didn't live up to that, like that's David Goggins' biggest fear and that's the way I feel, like and that's why I keep talking about God, put this on me for a reason. And if I don't be obedient and tell my story, like when I meet him, like what does that say about Sean Rubish? What does that say about Ben? What does that say about Dan? And are you meeting God's expectation for your life? Are you using his gifts that he gave?
Speaker 4:you? Do we live up to our potential of what he saw for us?
Speaker 5:And again, the closer you get to God, the harder it becomes, in my opinion. Oh yeah, Because you always talk about the imposter syndrome like 100%, like I struggle some days. Everybody does, I think. But you just got to keep moving forward. God has given you a gift. Use it.
Speaker 4:That's great. The obedience thing I think we all struggle with too. What I always tell myself is if I'm trying to be obedient with God and I believe the Holy Spirit is telling me something and I do it, I might miss. I don't think the God I serve is one that's going to be like yeah, Ben, you screwed it up. Like now you're going to deal with the consequences. Like I feel like if you're being obedient to God and you're doing the right thing, I think God's going to take care of you and if you're off the path, he's going to put you right back on the path. But I believe that's a God we serve.
Speaker 5:I agree, and you may not know what that next step is, but just keep walking forward and it'll be. It'll open up. It will open up. I don't know what's next. Well, I may have a feeling what's next, but I don't know how that's going to work out. I don't know what that looks like, but I'm going to keep walking forward and I'm going to start being more obedient and I, I put my, I put my trust in God, I put my trust in God, amen, amen, all right, everybody, turning pain into purpose.
Speaker 3:We'll have links to the show. You can see it on the screen right now if you're on YouTube or on Patreon. There's a couple of different ways to get it, through Amazon or Sean's website as well. But buy this book. Buy it for yourself, buy it for someone else who needs to hear it, buy it for that kid out there who you know struggling that needs to, to see that, no matter what happens in your life, that you will get through it, it will get better. You just got to keep taking that step. Also, if there's any businesses out there, if there's any uh, church groups, anybody out there looking for a speaker Sean did not give me permission to say this, but I'm going to say it anyways because I'm a bully Sean is available to come and share his story and, beyond his story, the lessons that he's learned in life about how to persevere, how to get through it, how to have faith.
Speaker 3:And he's he's he's just starting that journey. But if you're looking for somebody to come and motivate, to come and inspire, to come and help that one person, sean's your man, so you can. You can reach Sean. He's on all social media platforms. Well, again, we'll have everything linked to this episode. You can reach out to me or to Ben or to the Be Tempered website. We'll have everything on there as well. But support him, continue to support the show like you do. We appreciate all that stuff. Go out, be tempered.
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