Episode 139: Defining Your Story Through Self Discovery.

In the hustle of entrepreneurship, finding quiet time isn't just a luxury—it's a necessity. This is where one finds clarity about their innermost values and begins to get in motion. Through personal stories and professional insights, Jim and Matthew emphasize the importance of taking intentional breaks, advocating for the rejuvenating power of two-week vacations. Their discussion goes deep into financial core values guiding you down a path to aligning your financial resources with what truly drives your dreams and goals. Join the guys as they reflect on mindfulness techniques to find inner calm, focusing on the techniques to find congruency in life and business so both can be purposeful and rewarding.

Consider this episode a break from the grind, a chance for self-discovery, to rise above life's minutiae, much like accessing the calm of a mountain summit - one of the greatest spots for gaining clarity in life.

If you would like to learn more about the Kolbe assesment, you can find it in this LINK.


Chapter Summaries:
(00:00) Gratitude for New Beginnings and Reflection
Celebrating new family member, self-discovery in relationships, defining personal stories, intentionality, and gaining clarity through reflection.

(11:15) Finding Quiet Time for Success
Entrepreneurs need quiet time and extended vacations to disconnect from work and prioritize well-being and productivity.

(15:11) Discovering Your Financial Core Values
Understanding personal values, visions, and motivations in financial planning, with a focus on finding deeper purpose beyond wealth accumulation.

You can learn more about The Whole Wealth Journey by visiting The Gebhardt Group. You can follow us on Instagram @thewholewealthjourney

Transcript

Jim Gebhardt: [00:00:00] As we will say many times, you want to play to your strength. Sure. Right? I don't really care what your weaknesses are. We just want to abuse your strengths. We want to maximize your strengths and just take those and focus on those as your unique ability and blow those up everything else that you've gone through 82 years of education to go work on your weaknesses and Improve your your struggle in math or english or whatever.

Jim Gebhardt: It was god. I hate that word Bye, I hate that word weaknesses. It's still 

Matthew Grishman: it's skills you have and skills You don't have 

Jim Gebhardt: well, and so this is really all about optimizing maximizing those strengths. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, absolutely

Jim Gebhardt: Welcome to the whole wealth journey 

Matthew Grishman: Wealth with a Y. What does that mean? What does that mean? Are we spelling it funny? Uh, no, I think we're using the word Y. The word Y. Okay, not the [00:01:00] letter Y, the actual word Y. 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, I know Y. 

Matthew Grishman: Why? 

Jim Gebhardt: Because we want to help people get on their path. Then the path is all about their Y.

Matthew Grishman: And it's about aligning your finances with The people, the experience, and the passions that give their lives true meaning. 

Jim Gebhardt: It's getting way beyond the bank statements, the brokerage statements, the trust documents, the life insurance, and taking a deeper dive into your why. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, admittedly, we're not for everyone.

Matthew Grishman: This is different. We're for the bold ones who really want to dive deeper and seek a life that resonates with who they really are at their core. Who finds value in vulnerability. 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, 

Matthew Grishman: you and I 

Jim Gebhardt: do you and I do, and that's where we want to play, but not everybody is comfortable with that vulnerability.

Matthew Grishman: Maybe we should introduce ourselves. What do you think? Oh, that's a good idea. Jim Gebhardt and I'm Matthew Grishman. We are the co creators of the podcast The Whole Wealth Journey. Ready to find your why? Then let's get started [00:02:00] and get you one step closer to unlocking your inner wealth and well being.

Matthew Grishman: So what are you grateful for today? 

Jim Gebhardt: What am I grateful for today? It is absolutely the most joyous, fabulous news of the year. What? My niece had her second baby boy. Nice! And he was born yesterday. My niece Seven pounds is seven pounds five ounces. Ooh little guy born at eight o'clock in the morning and his name is Luca James Nice.

Jim Gebhardt: I am the James his middle name is after me. That's very cool. And I was quite touched by that I had a sneak preview of that when I was there in April. They let me know that that was happening, but Luca James was brought into the world yesterday and he is a handsome little guy I get to see him in October.

Jim Gebhardt: Beth and Jack are coming along to go look at schools while I'm [00:03:00] strategic coaching. They're gonna go see a couple of the schools in Chicago. And then we're gonna go spend a little time with the family out in the suburbs. Nice. So, so, so, so good. 

Matthew Grishman: That's awesome. New babies are wonderful. Oh, God. It just, it's amazing.

Matthew Grishman: How about you? I'm, uh, I'm grateful today. I'm grateful for, uh, my Lucas, James. You have a Luca James. I have a Lucas James. Nice! Yeah. Only my Lucas James is 21 years old. And he just recently turned 21 years old. What I'm most grateful for is watching that young man come into himself. He's not got all the answers in life that he's looking for yet.

Matthew Grishman: I mean, he's, who does a 21, right? Or or 51? I was gonna say at 52 or 61. I mean, I've got more answers than I used to have, but I still don't have all the answers. He's found someone, he's found a woman who just seems to be an incredibly good fit for him. She accepts him for who he is. [00:04:00] And she is just incredible.

Matthew Grishman: She's sweet, she's wonderful, she's kind, she's energetic. And she's just got this loving personality about her, this open, warm, loving personality about her that has pulled something out of him that I've never seen before. So I just, I have an incredible amount of gratitude that, although Lucas is still trying to figure some stuff out, he's, he's happy and he's enjoying himself and just living a great life.

Matthew Grishman: What do they 

Jim Gebhardt: say, what do they say about love? Well, when you find when you find your mate. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, 

Jim Gebhardt: your mate complete you. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah, and since most of us are walking around as incomplete He's probably feeling a level of wholeness and completeness he's never felt before. 

Matthew Grishman: Oh, absolutely. Boy does that, that tees up a whole episode we could do on codependency and how we , how we wait for others to complete the rest of us before we complete ourselves and go out and find those others.

Matthew Grishman: But you know, we'll do that another time. Sure. [00:05:00] That's, we have, we have lots of 

Jim Gebhardt: programming 

Matthew Grishman: for that . We have lots of relationship with self coming up, but I think we're still in the middle of our curriculum. Where we finished unpacking the story now we got to define now now we got it now that we've unpacked it a little bit We've got to get a little clearer and we got to define the story, which is really the next big part of the process here defining the story really becomes That bridge between where you are and where you want to go, right?

Matthew Grishman: We've had the conversation about the people the places The passions the play The prosperity, the different aspects of wealth that make up who you are. We've taken that inventory. We spent some time talking about how we take that inventory, how we treat our personal balance sheet, like a business balance sheet.

Matthew Grishman: And now that we have this idea of. Who we are, where we are. Now we're [00:06:00] going to start uncovering a little bit more of where we're going. 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, for pushing 30 years now, most of the clients that I've met with had been somewhere between the ages of 40 and 65. And they've had a bunch of life experience up to that point.

Jim Gebhardt: And they've been marching down the trail and collecting their this and that's and their bags of money and different shapes and sizes and accounts and structures. And. Life's busy and I just keep going. And there's not been very much intentionality behind it. And that's why the, the inventory exercise is so critically important because it's, I mean, how many times have you and I seen this where really it's one of the first times in their adult lifetime where they have assembled all of the information and then unpacked it all with us in a conference room.

Jim Gebhardt: It's a general reaction is a little bit of awe on their part. Like. Wow, that's a lot of moving pieces and whoo, [00:07:00] wow, right? And so now we actually get to go reassemble the puzzle piece with, with some intentionality, right? Right. And that's the fun part in this bridge building in terms of, you know, here's where you are.

Jim Gebhardt: And you've started to define where you'd like to go. 

Matthew Grishman: Yep. 

Jim Gebhardt: And how do we reassemble these pieces in such a way? Exactly. That gets you there. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, 

Jim Gebhardt: and you know, ideally get you there faster than perhaps you would have on your own We can help accelerate that progress. 

Matthew Grishman: Sure. Well because think about it the acceleration comes from What you and I are actually doing in this part of the process, which is really I mean This part of the process really is an extension of the discovery.

Matthew Grishman: We're learning more about who you are In this process, we're going up 30, 000 feet. I mean, we We're getting away from all the statements and all the paper and all the accounts 

Jim Gebhardt: and all the blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. 

Matthew Grishman: In the good old days, you and I referred to this part of our process as the top of the mountain meeting.

Matthew Grishman: Right. Right, this idea of defining your story by getting [00:08:00] up, you know, to let's call it 30, 000 feet. I mean, envision that for a second. 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, when you're up there, do you know how do you know how quiet it is when you're up there? Yeah, I mean I've only been up to 300 feet parasailing. Oh, right. Yeah Yeah, and I have a fear of heights that I don't know if I've ever talked about on the show But it's about a 10 year old new phenomenon for me 

Matthew Grishman: the fear of heights fear of heights That's only been around 10 years for you.

Matthew Grishman: Oh, yeah. I thought that was a whole like 

Jim Gebhardt: no thing No, it was a sudden kind of out of nowhere like oh my god, where did this come from? It's something trigger it I wish I could remember But you just 

Matthew Grishman: felt like it's been around about a decade. 

Jim Gebhardt: And so we're on vacation over Thanksgiving, eight years ago.

Jim Gebhardt: Google reminded me of that with a slideshow the other day. Nice. And we were all, the two families, we were all going parasailing. And Grant and I did not want to do this. 

Matthew Grishman: Uh, I was going to say, what was your initial reaction to the suggestion? Not a 

Jim Gebhardt: good idea 

Matthew Grishman: for the 

Jim Gebhardt: big fella and his little guy. Right.

Jim Gebhardt: Right. So, We got about half of the [00:09:00] group done and the wind picked up and they said the bots no more Tomorrow come back tomorrow, and we'll do the rest of you tomorrow. Okay. I was like, oh great I get to sleep on it some more cuz I didn't go in the first half where I was dragging my feet I'm not going.

Jim Gebhardt: Oh, 

Matthew Grishman: so were you I mean, were you still contemplating at this point? Oh, no 

Jim Gebhardt: No, we were we were we were doing it Oh, you were gonna do it and I were knuckle buddies and we were gonna you know, we're gonna white 

Matthew Grishman: Wow, 

Jim Gebhardt: and so they let us out the next day 300 feet on a line up Over the sea of Cortez. Oh, my other fear is sharks in the ocean.

Jim Gebhardt: So I got an idea. Let's put the big fella. Let's dangle some 

Matthew Grishman: bait over the ocean. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah, exactly. Floating 300 feet above the sea of Cortez. I realize there's no sharks there, but, but what, but what, but what I noticed when I got up there was how quiet it was. Sure. And Grant and I just looked at one another and we were like, This is awesome.

Jim Gebhardt: It's so cool. We can't hear any of that [00:10:00] down there and Just the breeze blowing. Oh my god. It was fantastic So that, this exercise is, is intentionally supposed to be like that, is to get above the noise. 

Matthew Grishman: Where's your quiet place? 

Jim Gebhardt: Right? Get, get above it all. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: So that you've got, you've got the, the time and the space to be able to try to, you know, let some of this clarity come.

Matthew Grishman: That's how you and I at times have helped clients tap into that quiet because one of the things you introduced me to a long time ago was this app called Calm. Tamara Leavitt. Has created to me one of the most revolutionary Pieces of technology on planet earth and that is this app called calm Where c 

Jim Gebhardt: a l m?

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, she she has assembled initially what it was We should we talk about it a lot, but you know what I am sponsored by them We may not get financial deposits in the bank for talking about it and dropping. We get other deposits. But I've gotten many a spiritual deposits and fulfillment [00:11:00] deposits based on my relationship with Tamara and her app and all of the people that go into creating its content.

Matthew Grishman: It was originally created as a mindful meditation app where Tamara would talk to you for 10 minutes about whatever's going on in the day. Right. Always had a theme. And she still does that, the Daily Comm, but now you have Jay Shetty participating. Masterclasses in Shaquille O'Neal has done a whole masterclass.

Matthew Grishman: LeBron James. It's cool stuff. And one of the things that, when I was an early subscriber, that has stuck with me now for a long time is how Tamara, who's from Toronto, big city, talks about how to bring that quiet into your life no matter where you are. And this I think was what springboarded us into this activity and into this part of our process is how she talks about being able to sit in a New York City subway with all of the noise around her.

Matthew Grishman: And through breathing and meditation be able to find the quiet within the noise. It doesn't shut the noise off. You're [00:12:00] still aware of all the noise, but somehow internally being able to quiet your mind enough. To find a moment of clarity, despite the noise around you. So one of the things that we've started to do, I know a lot in the Roseville office, we've done this together with clients in Lafayette offices is starting to have this conversation about where's your quiet place.

Matthew Grishman: Where do you feel 30, 000 feet up in the air? 13th hole at Pacific dunes. Then let's go there right now. Oh, I'm there. Right. Close your eyes. I 

Jim Gebhardt: spend most of my time there. Perfect. 

Matthew Grishman: Beautiful. And if you can learn to do that with your eyes open, even better. But let's start with our eyes closed and let's get to that place where we can get on top of whatever your mountain is and have this really clear 360 degree view where it is absolutely quiet.

Matthew Grishman: And we have the space to vision, to think, to be, to be. Absolutely. Because when we're up [00:13:00] there, What we're trying to do is answer three critical questions. 

Jim Gebhardt: What's for lunch? Who wins the election? And? And who wins the World Series? Perfect. 

Matthew Grishman: I love them. We'll do that next time. Okay. Those are good. Alright. How do you get things done?

Matthew Grishman: First and foremost, as a human, when we get all the distraction out of the way, how do you actually operate and get things done? And we have a tool that we'll talk about and do that. How do you see the role of money in your life? And we've got some tools that help us do that. And finally, what are your core values that drive your most important decisions?

Matthew Grishman: Ah, 

Jim Gebhardt: we have a lovely exercise for that. 

Matthew Grishman: We've got an incredible tool for that as well. So when we go up to this quiet place and we help you get there, this is more of the kind of inventory that we're going to help guide out of you. It's not something we're going to give you, It already exists inside of you.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, we have tools we've developed. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah 

Matthew Grishman: to help [00:14:00] get that out of you. So being with us here today Let's pause for a second and just what, because we, we, we want you, our tribe to kind of go through this experience with us right here in the podcast. Although we're not sitting in a conference room in Lafayette, your office or Roseville in my office.

Matthew Grishman: We're on 

Jim Gebhardt: the 13th tee at Pacific dunes. Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: Let's be there right now. We're out on, on the middle of sugar pine reservoir on a paddleboard with me. There you go. Right. That's my quiet place where on a Monday afternoon. If I need quiet, I can get in the car, drive one hour to the Sugar Pine Reservoir outside of Forest Hill, California and sit out on my paddle board with no cell coverage, this one place on earth that cell phones have forgotten about.

Matthew Grishman: Shh, don't let, don't, don't let them know. And there's 

Jim Gebhardt: absolute quiet. It's amazing. So for most of our listeners as very successful business owners, thriving entrepreneurs, do you think they get a lot of that? Do you think they get a lot of quiet, peaceful? Time to think, or just to, just to [00:15:00] be? 

Matthew Grishman: Well, I know as one of those, no.

Matthew Grishman: Right. It's been something that, as an entrepreneur, as a serial entrepreneur, I've had to be very intentional about how I get that time built into my day. I had breakfast with a friend this morning, where I was lamenting a little bit about, I feel a little over my skis. I feel like, I just, I've said yes to a lot, you know, I have a lot of commitments out there and the one thing that seems to be suffering is my ability to have quiet thinking time.

Matthew Grishman: And I need that's important to me and I need to figure out how I bring that back into my schedule because I had it. It works so well. I was watching you reading a book at 630 in the morning on one of our little retreats. I started doing it for a few days and it works so well. It stopped. Of course. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah.

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. You bet. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. So how do I bring 

Jim Gebhardt: that back in? I did too, by the way. I just restarted that this week. Nice. Yeah. Oh, good on so well, I stopped. There you go. I'm a little off course here, so forgive me. But, um, It's one of the reasons we are such big advocates [00:16:00] of two week vacations, right? I mean, serial entrepreneurs and business owners struggle to take vacation as it is.

Jim Gebhardt: And if they don't have the right boundaries set up, they're going to bring work with them. They're going to participate on a Zoom call. They're going to check in too much, right? And, uh, Our dear friend, Dan Sullivan, talks about these free days, which are 24 hour periods of no work, nothing, right? And I distinctly remember the first time I was in Strategic Coach, and our leader, Lee Brower, asked, Show of hands, how many of you have taken a one week vacation in the past year?

Jim Gebhardt: Without doing any work There were about 40 of us in the room 35 40 of us in the room 

Matthew Grishman: Right, 

Jim Gebhardt: and there were only a couple of us that put our hands up so By nature, it's very difficult for people to to go on a vacation and try to get the quiet right space, right? And that's why that second week of the vacation is so critical because you got you need a couple days to unwind And then [00:17:00] you got a day or two in the middle where you're you're actually on vacation Then if you're anything Like most of the business owners we work with, a couple of days before you re entry, you start percolating on, oh I gotta do this, and I gotta talk to Susie about that, and oh shit I got this contract, I gotta, whatever it is.

Jim Gebhardt: That's why that second week of vacation is so vital. Sure. I know it's a total sidebar. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, but, but it's the essence of what we're trying to create to be able to uncover this very important part of the financial planning process of the whole wealth journey. It sure is for us. 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, I don't know about many of the compadres in the industry, but for us, this really is the cornerstone of the whole show.

Matthew Grishman: Absolutely. The most important thing we do. 

Jim Gebhardt: If we don't, I'm not even going to say get this right, but it's like, if we don't have an understanding of what really drives you as a human being. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, how you get things done and what drives you as a human being. How you 

Jim Gebhardt: get things done, what drives you, what are your values, what are your visions, what are you hoping and dreaming to accomplish?

Jim Gebhardt: If we [00:18:00] don't have a sense of that, then with all due respect, what's the money for? 

Matthew Grishman: Right. What's the point? 

Jim Gebhardt: I mean you want to just go collect it like you're a collector of money. Yeah, grow it for me 

Matthew Grishman: How much you gonna make me? 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah, go refer you to uh, 

Matthew Grishman: do we cheat him and now 

Jim Gebhardt: to bernie madoff? Sure, i'm sure 

Matthew Grishman: they've reinvented by now how much you're gonna make me bernie right lots.

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, absolutely first and foremost, right so Hopefully you've taken a minute. Just play with us here today Get to that place. What is that place for you? What does that quiet place look like? Where is it? Can you take a second and just push pause on the show, close your eyes, and in three deep intentional box breaths, three seconds, draw breath in, three seconds, hold the breath, three seconds, let the breath out.

Matthew Grishman: Can you do three of those big box breaths? And get yourself to that quiet place, wherever it may be. And then come back to the show, and let's start the [00:19:00] exercise. Here we go. Okay, how was that? Are you there? 

Jim Gebhardt: Oh, I'm the 13th hole. Absolutely. I just striped the four iron right to about six feet below the hole.

Jim Gebhardt: Nice. What was the 

Matthew Grishman: shape? Was it a little bit of a fade? A little 

Jim Gebhardt: bit of a draw? On that one you would like to hit a little bit of a draw. Nice. Because otherwise you got to go over this little thing called the Pacific Ocean if you hit a cut. I'm trying to avoid that. Is that what I hit? A cut? Is that what it's called?

Jim Gebhardt: Yours is, I know you like a cut of beef. Right. You don't want a slice of beef. No, I like a cut of beef. Right. Right. Yours is traditionally a little bit more of a slice, right? 

Matthew Grishman: Which goes in the ocean? Oh, that's fabulous. All right. Well, you're you're on the 13th hole at Pacific I'm out in the middle of sugar pine and now we're gonna step into the world of Kathy Colby.

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah 

Matthew Grishman: Thank you Kathy, if you're listening, to the tool you created called the Colby A. Or her son David. Oh. Who's a new, a new strategic coach 

Jim Gebhardt: buddy. [00:20:00] Nice. I did not 

Matthew Grishman: know 

Jim Gebhardt: that. 

Matthew Grishman: Is 

Jim Gebhardt: David in 

Matthew Grishman: your 

Jim Gebhardt: class? No, he was at the, uh, the conference I went to in Nashville. Oh, nice. You guys have connected. And we got walking, we got walking in together and looked at the name tag and I was like, huh, I've never met many Colby's in my life spelled that way.

Jim Gebhardt: Right. Hmm. Any relation? Yeah, that's my mom. 

Matthew Grishman: Oh, good lord. Yeah. That's awesome. 

Jim Gebhardt: So, thriving business that is One of, you know, many diagnostic tools. Sure. There's, we've, you and I have spent a lot of time playing with a lot of these different tools that are out there. Come on, what entrepreneur hasn't? I hope so.

Jim Gebhardt: Right? 

Matthew Grishman: Well, 

Jim Gebhardt: come on. Myers Briggs being the stereotypical. If you're 

Matthew Grishman: sitting here, you've at least played with Myers Briggs. Sure. This is a CliftonStrengths. I mean, they're all sorts, yeah, all sorts of cool analytical stuff. Yep. What makes Cathy's tool the Colby A different? Correct. 

Jim Gebhardt: I think first of all, it's the simplicity.

Jim Gebhardt: Okay. It's the simplicity of looking at these four strengths that Either people have or don't [00:21:00] have and as you take any of these it's so hard Don't you feel it's hard not to 

Matthew Grishman: judge? Are they that well that's so that to that point are they strengths? Because they're either strengths or weaknesses or are they just qualities?

Matthew Grishman: Sure That's a better 

Jim Gebhardt: word is qualities that you either have more of or less of. 

Matthew Grishman: Right. It's very important to stay away from judgment Of the output because this is at a foundational level how you operate Yeah, and there's not much you hardwired. Yeah. Yep. Yeah, absolutely That's what I think is most unique about kathy's assessment because i've taken Myers briggs over the course of my life and the output of that has changed Colby output tends to stay consistent Because it's measuring something called the conative wiring within your brain gesundheit, right?

Matthew Grishman: Exactly. It's the instinctual way with how you you

Matthew Grishman: And that's what we're trying to assess in, in this first diagnostic tool that we use in a very [00:22:00] quiet, calming setting. What's your experience with Cathy's work been like? 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, transformative at a personal level. I think we have to define it a little bit. I mean, you have these four different categories, the fact finder, the follow through, the quick start and the implementer.

Jim Gebhardt: Okay. These words are just kind of labels. That help describe the qualities that somebody that is long in that suit, right? Little card reference. So if you're a fact finder, on a scale of 1 to 10, you're more in the, you know, 7, range, or 8, 9, 10 range. Yeah. You like the, the information. You like to research.

Jim Gebhardt: You like details. You're going to take it to the third decimal place. Right. My sister. I've never had her do Colby. My sister is a brilliant researcher, dog on a bone. We'll spend hours on this stuff. 

Matthew Grishman: Right. 

Jim Gebhardt: She enjoys that. She's very good at it and it brings her some joy. Right. And 

Matthew Grishman: it probably establishes some confidence in her ability to make a decision.

Matthew Grishman: Oh, it's the more, the [00:23:00] more facts. It's 

Jim Gebhardt: requirement for her to make a decision. Okay. Right. The follow through, just like it describes is someone that's, that's, you know, proficient in follow through is very good at. Follow through at getting stuff done, completing the task, right? Right? Taking it to the finish line.

Jim Gebhardt: That's 

Matthew Grishman: not as easy 

Jim Gebhardt: as it sounds. Well, not for you and me, because we're the third category, which are quick starts, right? Right. The quick start is the, is the quintessential executive summary, three bullet points. I don't want to order, bring me food. Just, you know, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom. Very quick. This is inherently the domain of the entrepreneur.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, 

Jim Gebhardt: this is probably, I don't know the stats on it, but I mean, if we had David or on the show, I bet it's 80 percent of entrepreneurs are quick starts. 

Matthew Grishman: Rank high in the quick start. Everybody has the quick start within them. Yeah. But in terms of, uh, you know, a seven, eight or a 

Jim Gebhardt: nine quality that is, you know, they're long [00:24:00] suit again.

Matthew Grishman: Sure. 

Jim Gebhardt: And then the last one being the, the implementer. And this is traditionally somebody that, that like tactically likes to do stuff. Our longtime assistant, Nancy, she had an eight. I'd never seen an eight implementer score before. Again, these are all zero to 10, 10 being the highest. When we did the exercise and we were going through it, I was scratching my head.

Jim Gebhardt: I'm like, she's a. She's an eight, what in the world? 

Matthew Grishman: It's a see it to believe it, it's a touch it to believe it kind of person. Then I remembered 

Jim Gebhardt: she was a pottery major in college, right? The person that has a high implementer score is someone that, you know, I'll, I'll pick on clients that came into the office years ago and we went through this exercise with them and they were arguing over this fence that needed to be repaired because I was asking them about upcoming expenses that we need to plan for and sure.

Jim Gebhardt: And the wife was like, Oh, we've got, you know, we've got like 150 feet of fence. And the husband was like, I'll do it. I'm no, we're not paying somebody to do that. I'm [00:25:00] going to do that. Sure. Who happened to be a contractor. Right. So it was a classic example of he was long as an implementer and she was not right.

Jim Gebhardt: And as stereotypical as that sounds, that's really a lot of what this boils down to is very stereotypical personas that we realize in people about. The researcher. 

Matthew Grishman: Sure. I was going to say, so how does this help us as financial planners to understand these four categories and where somebody ranks there?

Matthew Grishman: Well, it's 

Jim Gebhardt: secret sauce for us because we know as we get into certain components to the planning process, if you're strong in FactFinder, then, you know, Beavis and Butthead here, we got to, we got to take a deep breath and go way down the rabbit hole with the detail that that person requires. 

Matthew Grishman: Right. Right.

Matthew Grishman: Lots more information. For any idea we might bring to the table that helps better their financial lives. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: Right? Lots of details. 

Jim Gebhardt: Versus a quick start that needs, you know, the executive [00:26:00] summary and the three reasons why this makes sense. 

Matthew Grishman: Have you ever come across somebody that has a high score fact finder and a high score quick start?

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah, I find that they're a little confused. They're a little stuck when that happens. I have seen that as we'll say many times, you want to play to your strength. Sure. Right. This is not about, and I, and I still, we have a wonderful client 20 years later, who she was an intern for me many, many years ago.

Jim Gebhardt: And she came out of St. Mary's. She had a finance degree and we were talking about everything. I said, okay, great. Here's the deal. I don't really care what your weaknesses are. We just want to abuse your strengths. We want to maximize your strengths and just. Take those and focus on those as your unique ability and blow those up everything else that you've gone through 82 years of education to go work on your weaknesses and Improve your your struggle in math or English or whatever it was.

Jim Gebhardt: God. I hate that word. Uh, bye I hate that word weaknesses. It's right. 

Matthew Grishman: It's skills you have and skills. You don't have 

Jim Gebhardt: well And so this is really [00:27:00] all about optimizing maximizing those strengths. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, absolutely 

Jim Gebhardt: And it is so important to for us to have a sense of what is the, what is the nature of the client?

Jim Gebhardt: What is their natural inclination, right? I mean, I've told this story before, I'll tell it again. Long time clients, first time they ever came in. I remember it like it was yesterday. This is 2006 or 7. They come in for a financial planning meeting. Introductory. And they're new, right? Introductory. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: No unpacking at this point.

Jim Gebhardt: This is just a high Hawaii. They were referred by their CPA. And in, I don't know, like eight, nine minutes, the wife stands up. I'm in the middle of my shtick. The wife stands up, shakes my hand, says, Thank you very much, it was a pleasure meeting you. Uh, we'll talk to you soon. And she embraces with her husband and she walks out of the room.

Jim Gebhardt: What'd the husband do? He just, he sat there. And I, I probably went into like a cold sweat. Like, what in the world? What did [00:28:00] I, I mean, did I say something? I mean, I showered this morning. Did you offend her? I can't smell that bad. It's not, the day hasn't been that long, right? Well, it turns out once we did the Colby, she was a 9 quick start and the husband was an 8 fact finder.

Jim Gebhardt: Which explains why he sat there for another hour and a half asking me 88 questions. Sure. Right? Sure. Well, had that been information I knew going into the meeting, That would have been lovely. We don't do that as a precursor, that's not kind of what we do. But these are, this is a wonderful, I mean, we've done it with our team, right?

Jim Gebhardt: Sure. So if you're, if you're the quintessential entrepreneur, that's a quick start, you had better have people on your team that are exquisite at fact finding and follow through. Yeah, 

Matthew Grishman: absolutely. Otherwise Nothing will get done. Nothing's gonna happen. Well, we've talked a lot about the craft versus the business.

Matthew Grishman: Yes. The entrepreneur's got two businesses they run. There's being the craft, and then there's actually managing the goes ins and [00:29:00] goes outs of the business, which we started talking about an episode or two ago. Yes, thank you, Michael Gerber. Right? Exactly. Yeah. So, if we're great at the craft, we need some help managing the business, and even as quick starts, you and I have had a hard time.

Matthew Grishman: Like, we're three bullet points, we're ready to go, and we have people on our team that go, Hey, hey, hang on. Slow it down. Let's get a little more information. That's 

Jim Gebhardt: affectionately referred to as the drive by delegation. And thank, because we're, we expect them as quick starts to, that they can read our mind.

Jim Gebhardt: Right. I don't need to actually take the time to spell out. It's, this is what I would like you to do and here are the three steps that I need you to take and blah, 

Matthew Grishman: Yes. 

Jim Gebhardt: I just expect them to be able to puke on the page and they can read my mind and then I can, phew, I can move on. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, fortunately, there's an awareness that you and I have developed.

Matthew Grishman: And, and it's an awareness we're trying to help our tribe develop today. And, and this tool that Kathy's developed, her ColBie is a pretty cool diagnostic [00:30:00] to help you develop some awareness about your own tendencies and how you, Do things and get things done so that if you are a quick start, like the two of us, you can learn as a quick start how to be good with that.

Matthew Grishman: Hey, there's an idea I'm really excited about because the three bullet points you told me are ringing a bell in my head. Hey, Alison, would you please take some time to dig into this a little bit more and find out what I'm missing? Where are the blind spots here? What am I not seeing? And what's really cool is we have people on the team who do that.

Matthew Grishman: You and I also have a tendency as quick starts. To have some great ideas and we've got lots we're going to do with people and help clients accomplish and lots of to do's we need to get done. Thankfully, we've got people on the team who are exquisite at the follow through that we're, we're starting to build systems into our practice where as we're sitting here taking notes on our iPads, when we're done with taking notes, and we've got all this to do stuff [00:31:00] after a client meeting.

Matthew Grishman: Zoom, it gets fired off to Lindsay workflow and it goes into a workflow where we are told as quick starts It's now your turn to perform. So we don't have to manage the follow through. We just become a participant of it Yes, so these are which is a great tool for us. 

Jim Gebhardt: This this diagnostic is great for teams.

Jim Gebhardt: It's great for couples It's great for families. I mean we've had many We make it funny, uh, because we're actually closet comedians. When husbands and wives, or couples, do these, and there's bigger discrepancies, let's say, between one, well, let's say one's a very strong on FactFinder, and the other one's very strong on, on QuickStart.

Jim Gebhardt: We can have a little fun with, okay, so when, like, you go out to dinner, is Donna the, the very long, quick, uh, FactFinder? Asking the server all different kinds of questions and drilling into, you know, how is this prepared and where is it from and all [00:32:00] of that. And your eyes are rolling in your head as a nine quick start because you just want the prefix menu and can I have it now, please?

Jim Gebhardt: Right. Right. So there's some humor that can come out of recognizing the differences between partners. Humor and 

Matthew Grishman: healing. 

Jim Gebhardt: Oh, 

Matthew Grishman: sure. Right. Absolutely. I mean, I know that's funny. Right that we're sitting here envisioning a situation Where you're ready to order and whether it's beth or amy or whoever some mystery person we're talking about is sitting there Asking the waiter a thousand questions and well, i'm not sure yet Give me another minute and i'm ready to eat my left hand Yes as funny ha ha as these closet comedians can make that there are over time Relationship implications where that can cause problems When we're not aware of these style differences the I mean the number of times you and I have been told That some of these diagnostic tools and what you've helped us become aware of within our relationship Has been so much more valuable for the [00:33:00] health of our marriage than anything you could ever do on the money side money side I mean we love the growth and we love the protection and how you got us in cash in 2022 and got us out of the market and Away from all that crap, but holy cow the value Of how we can communicate better now as partners in a marriage Thank God we're in the financial planning business.

Matthew Grishman: Exactly. Yeah. That's the SIC 

Jim Gebhardt: code. 

Matthew Grishman: I think. Absolutely. All right. So Colby, if you haven't yet been convinced that this could be a valuable tool for you, go visit your effect 

Jim Gebhardt: finder, 

Matthew Grishman: right? You or someone on your team probably need to go online and do a little bit more homework with Kathy's Colby, a tool, or you can go to our website, Gebhardt, Paul, wealth.

Matthew Grishman: com connect with us. And let's help you use that Colby tool. Uh, the most effective way it could help you kind of uncover some of this stuff for you, your family, your business. Love it. We love the tool. Okay. Colby tool. What's, so once we've kind of figured out [00:34:00] how you operate, what we want to discover next is how you actually see the role of money in your life.

Matthew Grishman: And we have a couple of diagnostic tools we'd like to use here. The first being our dreams and visions worksheet. Tell me about it. It's just a great way 

Jim Gebhardt: to get it down on paper, right? If you're in the quiet. Well, your dreams and visions. There you go. That makes sense. Uh, in the sense of being up in the quiet and you really start to think about, okay, is it three years from now?

Jim Gebhardt: Is it five years from now? Is it a grander vision that's 10 years out? What does this look like? Where do you want to be? Where do you want to be living? What do you, I mean, I think one of the greatest dividends from COVID is the portability of life. The flexibility of being able to be anywhere doing a job if you're still doing a job or this whole movement like, you know, our dear friends Glenn and Joyce who go, they live places for 30, 60, 90 days at a time.

Jim Gebhardt: Sure. Right. The whole advent [00:35:00] of Airbnb and all this stuff. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. One of the cool ways the pandemic happened for us, right? I think, I think so. I mean, 

Jim Gebhardt: and again, when you have the time and the space and the quiet to think, right, you're out of the hubbub of the day to day of raising a family, running a business, right?

Jim Gebhardt: Just all of that chaos that, that surrounds day to day life. When you can step out and you can start to think about, okay, what is, what is the vision here? Where do Beth and I want to be in 10 years? And for us, we said it's the house that we just remodeled. Sure. We want to be here. And do we want to flip and move and take time away?

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah, sure. But this is home base. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: And we put the roots, the roots deep in the ground. For other people, we meet them all the time. Uh, we're, we're moving. As soon as Junior is, uh, out of high school and halfway through college, Bye bye. Yeah. We are wherever. Right. Fill in the blank. 

Matthew Grishman: Right. 

Jim Gebhardt: So [00:36:00] this Dreams and Visions exercise is, is really just, again, it's sometimes it's some of the first times we've seen grown adults actually like sit and take the time to do this, because this is homework we're giving them.

Jim Gebhardt: We're not doing this in their presence. Right. They get to go think about what it is that they really want to be doing in some different categories. 

Matthew Grishman: What I love about it is we're, we're kind of setting people up with societally the dreams and visions that we're supposed to be thinking about. Like, one of, like what you and Beth are contemplating, what you just described, this idea of do I stay or do I go in retirement, right?

Matthew Grishman: That, that's just a traditional thing, a standard thing that people will start to think about as they get closer to, you know, what's next, life after work. And what we're trying to identify is actualizing a complete change, different direction, moving away, something that is heart's core, something you feel [00:37:00] obligated to, something that you see as maybe fun to do, but not a reality, or is it completely not applicable and not on your radar, right?

Matthew Grishman: What I like is we're giving people, okay, here are the things society tells us we should be thinking about, right? Is our for us or is it To take care of our family, should we be thinking about a new career? Should we be thinking about staying or going all of these things? Society says we're supposed to be.

Matthew Grishman: contemplating and what we're trying to do is figure out of these main planning categories. What really is at your heart's core versus what do you kind of feel is more of a societal obligation? Like I'm supposed to take care of these people in my life and I'm kind of feeling this have to conflict, right?

Matthew Grishman: Or is there something that Is kind of on that fun to list where yeah, I mean it'd be kind of fun to explore that But i've never really given myself the time to sit down and explore it And maybe you guys can help create that space for us, right? [00:38:00] so starting from that 30 000 foot of How you actually see and actualize your future and how it connects to money right how you see your money supporting you versus the other players in your life, the other people in your life.

Jim Gebhardt: Well, and this exercise, this conversation is absolutely vital to the success of the business owner post Right? Post work, post transaction, post liquidity event, post sale, whatever you want to call it. Well, please say it again. Please share the statistic again. Oh, it's staggering. 75 percent of all business owners who successfully complete a transaction to sell, which that's a whole separate conversation about how few are actually able to have a successful transaction.

Jim Gebhardt: But 75 percent surveyed one year after the close of the sale of the business, Regret the decision because and it's not the money because because they haven't done the personal planning again Not [00:39:00] financial planning, but they haven't spent the time in what we're gonna we're gonna use our words in dreams and vision land On how are they going to have a meaningful, fulfilling post work phase of life.

Jim Gebhardt: What we often will refer to as Life 3. 0. Right? Life 1. 0 was before work in the business. Life 2. 0 was during work in the business. And now Life 3. 0 is post all of that. 

Matthew Grishman: Absolutely. 

Jim Gebhardt: So if there's no game plan, the statistics are most people are miserable. Right. Right. And one of our core missions at Gebhardt Group is to help the entrepreneur do.

Jim Gebhardt: A beautiful job of preparing, this isn't going to, this isn't, this isn't happening over like 30, 60, 90 days, right? This is going to take time. It's going to take years to develop. But guess what? If you don't, if the journey doesn't start with the first, you know, the journey of the thousand miles doesn't start with the first step, you're going nowhere.

Matthew Grishman: That's where really dreams and visions gets us in [00:40:00] motion and it starts because it's going to help us uncover how much you see money as a tool to support yourself versus others. How much do you see providing financial security for other people your responsibility? Right. And taking your temperature on this stuff.

Matthew Grishman: Absolutely. I mean, do you see your money as a tool to having more impact in Life 3. 0? And what might that begin to look like, right? That's the foundation for being able to figure out, well, depending on the answers to these vision questions, And depending on the answers to the financial life checklist, which we're going to get into in a minute, that's going to start setting the turn by turn directions of how we actually plan for that time going forward.

Jim Gebhardt: I'm thinking of an entrepreneur who was an insurance broker, had his own insurance, small brokerage agency. And we went through this exercise and he said that, I mean, you know, had all the money, had all the trappings, had the cars, had the house, had the place in Tahoe, all that money. There was no [00:41:00] lack of money, but he was bored off of his ass.

Jim Gebhardt: And I said, what would you really like to be doing? He's like, Oh, I just, I really, I just really wanted to be a high school football coach. Cool. Really? Yeah. But I knew I could make a living at that. So I went into the insurance business. Okay. So what do you want to do about it now? Well, I just, I love kids.

Jim Gebhardt: I love working with kids. I love coaching kids at the high school level. Okay, great. What would you like to do about it now? Well, I love coaching kids. Uh, what would you like to do about it now? And I was, I was a bit of a pain in the ass as I often can be. And he, he came to the realization that, you know, he could go volunteer as an assistant.

Jim Gebhardt: I mean, he had the ability to, you know, make his schedule, right? He's an entrepreneur. 

Matthew Grishman: Yep. 

Jim Gebhardt: And he started as the assistant coach on the JV basketball team. Oh, cool. And worked his way up to assistant coach on the varsity football team. And it became an unbelievably [00:42:00] fulfilling phase of his life because he wasn't at a loss for what he was going to do with all of this time.

Jim Gebhardt: Post the being an insurance broker. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, right. Let's stay with that example for a second How much did he share because you've shared that story with me before I didn't know where you're going at first But then I remember you've shared that what I'm curious about is how involved was his partner spy assume he's married Yes, three kids how involved?

Matthew Grishman: Was his spouse his wife in like the conversation about this is what I've always wanted to do fully 

Jim Gebhardt: supportive Tired of frankly tired of hearing about it and him not taking any action. 

Matthew Grishman: So that's awesome 

Jim Gebhardt: and His wife is she's a lovely person, but she can be a bit of a hammer And in what way, just, just a driver, just total accountability partner, bang, bang, bang.

Jim Gebhardt: Why? You know, just do it, do it, do it, do it. Huh. 

Matthew Grishman: Funny how we, uh, entrepreneurs tend to attract accountability partners like that. [00:43:00] Yes. Yeah. And so she, she actually was like relieved. 

Jim Gebhardt: That's awesome. That he did it. That's so cool. And they weren't clients forever because we didn't cook our food spicy enough, but I see them walking the dogs all the time and then, you know, they come walking by and it's always delicious.

Jim Gebhardt: Super pleasant. And I get to talk with Rob about, you know, how are the boys looking this year on the football team? And if the wife's walking by, we have a, I mean, it just, it elevates the relationship when you, when you're willing to go. Get in the weeds on some of these topics. Sure and help Help discover what are some of those stepping stones to get them to move forward 

Matthew Grishman: This is so critical that the reason i'm bringing this second half of the story up is it's so critical That your partner be a part of this conversation Because i've recently experienced an example where the partner was not part of the conversation of what's next and it left an absolute Mess and a disaster.

Matthew Grishman: I I came across that's gonna be a struggle. We we got a referral From a friend of a friend of a [00:44:00] woman who's recently widowed She lost her husband about a year and a half ago, and she has all this resentment over How he retired And basically put all of his effort into being a part of the local Little League organization.

Matthew Grishman: And how he gave away all of his services as a professional, which I'll leave anonymous what he does. But all of this money was owed to his business that he just let people off the hook on because he wanted more from his money than just more money. He was that type of entrepreneur that there was something else besides just making money and having impact in my community.

Jim Gebhardt: Well, but bringing it back to your analogy earlier about being good at the craft. 

Matthew Grishman: Yes, he was great at running the business. Not great at running the business. Right. And, Horrible at communicating with his partner what he saw in Life 3. 0 and the kind of impact he wanted to have. And they started to kind of drift off and live very separate lives.

Matthew Grishman: And now he's gone a couple of years. There's a lot of resentment that's been built [00:45:00] up. And as a result of not being part of that conversation, there's a lot of damage that's been done. Oh yeah, sure. And a widow, a widow who feels very disconnected. Yeah. From her ability to be confident about her financial future.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, just because that didn't happen So yeah, so it's very 

Jim Gebhardt: sad 

Matthew Grishman: having an accountability partner whether that's your spouse your business partner a friend a sibling Okay, just somebody in your life that can be a part of this with you, right? Especially if you're married, especially if you have a partner this this dreams and visions conversation you and I will not have it With just the entrepreneur we're going through that right now.

Matthew Grishman: Nope where we have a new entrepreneur we're working with And initially there was a little pushback, you know, my wife she doesn't like talking about any of this stuff It's not her thing. Cool. Great. Great. We still need to get to know her She needs to be part of this conversation and I promise you This is not going to be all about money.

Matthew Grishman: Yes, right. And so Bringing that partner in is so important to have it [00:46:00] Especially when we go from dreams and visions to what's next and that's the financial life checklist. Oh You know who likes checklists who likes 

Jim Gebhardt: checklists my bride. Oh, she doesn't like when I say my bride. No my wife Oh, there you go.

Jim Gebhardt: I think bride is more of an elevated. I mean it takes us back 27 years to a Younger, carefree time in our life. Wife just seems more pedantic. Okay. That's the word of the day for Kevin. 

Matthew Grishman: Is Kevin still with us? Oh, yeah. All right. Hi, Kevin. Absolutely. Thanks for being here today. 

Jim Gebhardt: Oh, she loves checklists.

Jim Gebhardt: Checklists are like, I mean, most of the people on our team who happen to be strong at follow through love checklists. Sure. 

Matthew Grishman: It helps with the follow through process. So 

Jim Gebhardt: this one, this one is more, I think of it more of like an x ray. Yeah. Totally. Totally. Yeah, it's a snapshot. It's a snapshot of a g billion different little categories in money land, insurance land, in budgeting land, in estate planning land, right?

Matthew Grishman: [00:47:00] Yeah, health insurance, land, every, every aspect of life that money touches. 

Jim Gebhardt: That lets you self evaluate, right? And the scores are, are generally speaking on the lower side of the curve because culturally we just don't talk about this stuff, that we don't educate ourselves on this stuff. 

Matthew Grishman: It's a checklist on.

Matthew Grishman: I think 26 different financial items, and how satisfied are you with your progress in these areas, zero to five? Yeah, it's a self grading. Yeah, how satisfied are you with your level of financial education? How satisfied are you with your level of benefits at work, with debt? Your investment choices.

Matthew Grishman: Investment choices, investment knowledge, with the professionals you work with in life, with how you emotionally handle Money conversations. Money conversations. Right. Right. How satisfied are you with all of these different aspects of your life? And it's a wonderful, wonderful snapshot. To see how you feel about all the places where money touches you in [00:48:00] your life and what we're 

Jim Gebhardt: looking for Again, no rights and wrongs.

Jim Gebhardt: No judgments. No nada on What the scores are what the x ray says what we're looking for the outliers the ones in the fives 

Matthew Grishman: And where you and your partner are on different pages. The overlap. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. That's why I call it an x ray because if we took both of their forms and held them up to the light, we could see where the overlaps are and where they're not.

Jim Gebhardt: Yep. Right? Yep. Generally, generally, those are some friction points where they're off pages or there's friction where they're like both on the same page about something on the low end because more it's a frustration. Like they don't know how to deal with the budgeting. They don't know how to deal with the level of debt that they, I mean, they're stuck, right?

Jim Gebhardt: And this is where Interstage left. What you and I love to do. So the, the whole point of the exercise is it's not meant to be super [00:49:00] heady. It's meant to be a snapshot that you go through and you rip off the answers to this. I would like us to kind of bring these back to clients several years later, you know, three, four years later to see how they rescore that.

Jim Gebhardt: So for Lindsay, who's listening to this, there's a new project for you to start to implement in reviews that are, let's say, you know, two plus three plus year relationships. Sure. Because it does change, right? It does, let's say Colby doesn't necessarily change in terms of the, the, the conative scoring. Sure.

Jim Gebhardt: Your situation and stage of life with this financial life checklist is going to evolve. 

Matthew Grishman: Sure. Your Colby score is conative wiring. It's how you operate as a human. The financial life checklist is about capabilities and how you feel about certain financial capabilities in your life. And if we're doing our job, it's Which is why we do this assessment in the beginning is to see where there are potential vulnerabilities where you're not feeling The most confident in yourself or the most clear about [00:50:00] how to get from where you are or where you want to go And therefore you lack a sense of capability This is the worksheet that allows us to kind of uncover where some of your strengths That we can harness and leverage and some of your vulnerabilities that might be contributing to why you've got some places financially in life where you're feeling stuck.

Matthew Grishman: And if we go address those early in the process, in the financial planning process, and turn those into goals, which we're going to get to in a couple of episodes down the road here with the next couple steps, when we turn some of those vulnerabilities into capabilities. Then my expectation would be in two or three years when we rescore this test.

Matthew Grishman: We got a whole bunch of new scores, a whole bunch of new capabilities that give us a sense of financial confidence that help us get from where we are to where we want to be. 

Jim Gebhardt: The other thing that you and I are looking for when we, when we go through the checklist with someone after, I mean, again, this is homework.

Jim Gebhardt: They've done it on their own. They're not like sitting under our, [00:51:00] Watchful eye doing it. This is total blind spot land. You and I are, are always looking for the blind spot that the, that the entrepreneur and the, and the spouse can't see. That's the definition, by the way, of a blind spot in case you didn't know, but also the triage moment.

Jim Gebhardt: Where is the patient bleeding out? What is an absolute raw part of their financial life? 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. What could sink everything right now that you're working for? 

Jim Gebhardt: And it still blows my mind all these years later. How often, that's estate planning. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, 

Jim Gebhardt: I'd say that's number one. How often that is estate planning.

Jim Gebhardt: I had a review with a long time client yesterday, and he's moved a couple times from Reno to Santa Rosa, now up to not too far from the 13th hole at Pacific Dunes in Oregon. And I said, Chris, what's what's on your must do list? Like, you gotta do this before the end of the year in the financial end. [00:52:00] He's like, oh, I gotta do my estate plan.

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. I said, okay, do you have people that you are going to reach out to? Do you have, you know, do you have qualified people in your area to do this? Oh yeah, my brother's got a guy. I really like him. I said, okay, will you make a commitment with me today on when you will have that done by again, get the anchor an inch off the bottom of, I'm not asking him when he's going to have the estate plan done.

Jim Gebhardt: When are you going to call your brother's guy? Okay, what'd he say? Uh, within the next week. 

Matthew Grishman: Did he? 

Jim Gebhardt: Within the next 

Matthew Grishman: week. Oh, has he yet? Oh, this was yesterday. Sorry. No, it's okay. I didn't hear that part. It's all good. Okay. 

Jim Gebhardt: So, I've set a little tickler for myself to go ping him and say, should talk to the guy about the thing?

Jim Gebhardt: Huh? 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: And this triage mindset that we use, uh, Can I put 

Matthew Grishman: a bet down right now? Well, sure. I'm going to bet you a dollar he doesn't do it. 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, I was, I was going to bet you a dollar he didn't do it. 

Matthew Grishman: Oh, you were going to take that he didn't do it? Yeah. No, no, I called it first. 

Jim Gebhardt: Okay. 

Matthew Grishman: So you got the dollar that he does do it.

Matthew Grishman: Okay. Because I, [00:53:00] I owe you more money on the dollar bet anyways. This is a way for me to get a buck back. Get it back. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: And, and here's why I say that. Here's why. Go ahead, teach. Come on, teach. Here, it, the law of diminishing intent says. What was that? The law. of diminishing intent says that every day you don't do something that you're committed to doing your intent to do it exponentially diminishes to where if we're two weeks out the intent is at zero it won't happen so one of the things that i know we're trying to do more is in a situation like that It needs to go on your calendar right now.

Matthew Grishman: When are you going to do it? Not within, but give me the day and the time that it is on your calendar and best. It's how about you do it as soon as we hang up the phone. 

Jim Gebhardt: That's a good one. Oh, 

Matthew Grishman: that's one of my favorites. That's the only way it gets done for me is, you know, I like [00:54:00] to 

Jim Gebhardt: follow the law. I'm a law abiding citizen.

Jim Gebhardt: So if the law of diminishing intent, I mean, if it's, if it's a law, I've got to follow it. 

Matthew Grishman: Exactly like the laws of gravity. Thank you, John Panette. Very good. Very good. Good reference. That to me for. Holding somebody accountable to get that done. It either has to happen now, or it has to be scheduled. If it's not on my calendar, as a busy entrepreneur, who's very easily distracted by a squirrel running in front of my face, if it's not on my calendar, it's not going to get done.

Matthew Grishman: For me, that's the ultimate to do list. 

Jim Gebhardt: Who doesn't want to talk about death? Oh. And what happens to my stuff when I'm dead? 

Matthew Grishman: That's why we call it graduation. And crossing the rainbow bridge and all these lovely, pleasant things. Oh, I love, I 

Jim Gebhardt: love the way you've repatriated some of these, these terms, but I mean, estate planning does feel very daunting.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: And as I, as I, uh, reassured the client yesterday, I'm like, really, the only thing you have to think about is who [00:55:00] would you want handling your stuff? Your, your, your, your what's called the successor trustee. Yep. If you're gone, you need three of them. 

Matthew Grishman: Right. Who handles your stuff and, and who handles your decisions.

Jim Gebhardt: Two would be great. Right. But three would be better and that's in financial land. And then healthcare wise, who would you want making decisions on your behalf? 

Matthew Grishman: Right. Who handles your stuff if you're not here and who helps, who makes decisions for you if you're here and you can't make decisions, 

Jim Gebhardt: right?

Jim Gebhardt: Develop that list. And then you can March right into the estate planning attorney's office. And literally they'll have it done in a couple of weeks because the rest of right now, estate planning land is if you're, if you're below the 27 million threshold of net worth and don't compliance hold me to that.

Jim Gebhardt: That's in the, that's in the neighborhood. I'm not even in the street address, but I'm, I'm, I'm definitely in the neighborhood on that number, which that's sunsets next year and 20 to 2025, 

Matthew Grishman: the 27 million threshold of, of what being able and 

Jim Gebhardt: wife each having 13 and change of net [00:56:00] worth that they can pass the state tax free.

Matthew Grishman: to the next generation. Yes. Okay. 

Jim Gebhardt: So if you're under that number in terms of a net worth, the planning really isn't that complicated and it's something you're going to be able to knock out in a month or two. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, it's a different component to the estate planning concept, right? You and I are sitting here.

Matthew Grishman: What we're seeing is the basics of just who handles your stuff and who makes decisions for you when you can't is one component to the estate plan. Then if you're fortunate enough to have amassed. An incredible amount of wealth then we've got to have a second level of estate planning that deals with a whole different kettle With the whole taxation of that estate Yes When it goes from you to your heirs to your children to your charities to whomever you decide is getting it That is a lengthy process and that's a whole different ball of wax that will be part of The show not necessarily part of the teaching curriculum here Because what we need to do is start Right.

Matthew Grishman: We need to start. 

Jim Gebhardt: And here we sit in the fall [00:57:00] of 2024. Yes. And this is going to sunset, uh, December 31st, 2024. 

Matthew Grishman: Yes. 

Jim Gebhardt: So, uh, sorry. And we've been Sorry, sorry, sorry. 

Matthew Grishman: December December 31st, 2025. And we've been advised by several estate attorneys that are friends of ours. Don't wait. Right. If you This is 

Jim Gebhardt: a, this is a process.

Jim Gebhardt: Yes. Particularly with very significant estates that, that, you know, takes time and thought and energy and research and it's iterative. You got to look at how does this look and what do we think about this and you've got to have time for you and your partner to make decisions on, it's a lot, right? And uh, getting in motion is step one.

Matthew Grishman: Yes. Yes. 

Jim Gebhardt: Uh, but Not to get too down the rabbit hole on the financial life checklist, but that's the one that traditionally we see time and time again is, you know, well, we haven't done any 

Matthew Grishman: well because it's important, but it's not urgent. It never has been urgent. Well, unless you're dying, unless you're told you have to go in for [00:58:00] open heart surgery and get a valve replaced.

Matthew Grishman: Right. I mean, that's what did it for me. We 

Jim Gebhardt: got a lot done when you had that happen 

Matthew Grishman: abs. Well, look, Amy and I did our estate plan when miles was born. We did everything we were supposed to do when you have that first baby. We got the trust We got some insurance the will we got some insurance. We got some powers of attorney We got the guardianship and then we stuck it on a shelf and yeah We never updated it.

Matthew Grishman: We didn't add the second kid to it. We didn't change it from the state of Washington to the state of California. When we moved here, we didn't do anything because it was always important and it was always back there, but it was never urgent until it was. What I'm going to say to the entire tribe and why we've gone down this kind of tangent ramp here on estate planning, when we're really talking about the whole financial checklist is there is some emergency here.

Matthew Grishman: I mean, you, you and I, I think do a brilliant job in our in our financial planning process to keep urgency outside the room, right? We we never want to bring the pressure of making a financial decision under [00:59:00] pressure right now, right? Time, space, never an urgent thing. If emotions 

Jim Gebhardt: in the room when you're making big decisions, that's bad.

Matthew Grishman: And urgency can cause a lot of emotions. Yes. We're bringing this up that if you have yet to start or you haven't been With an estate attorney for years and years and years. Cause you did like me and you, you did this 20 some odd years ago. There are some changes coming by the end of 2025 that should be motivating you to get into action.

Matthew Grishman: And if you need some help getting in action, talk to us. We have an unbelievable network. Of highly qualified, incredible human beings called estate planners. That you and I have created incredible personal and professional relationships with that we would, it would be a pleasure to introduce you to our, our network of people.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. And 

Jim Gebhardt: if you're not in our area where they can serve you due to licensing, they've got their own networks that we can reach out to and help find, you know, if you're in Panora, Iowa, we can help find an [01:00:00] estate attorney that's, uh, in Des Moines. 

Matthew Grishman: Absolutely. Absolutely. Well, good work on kind of starting this.

Matthew Grishman: 30, 000 foot view of where we are and where we're trying to go because now that we've established a little bit of the dreams and visions and how we see our money supporting us in life. And now we've kind of gone through the inventory and the self check of how we feel about all of these different areas of where money touches our lives.

Matthew Grishman: Now it's time to get into the next big diagnostic tool here in the whole vision space. And. Probably the most important part of the work that we do, and that's what we call the Clarity Compass. 

Jeff Holden: Hey Tribe, Ace here. We all know the guys can get a little carried away once they get on a topic they're so very, very passionate about, and I think that's what's happening here.

Jeff Holden: So, before we get into Clarity Compass, we're going to take a break, give you some time to [01:01:00] digest defining the story. There are some great pause points in the episode for you to reflect on. We look forward to seeing you in a couple of weeks to continue the story on the Clarity Compass. 

Matthew Grishman: Thanks for joining us today on the Whole Wealth Journey.

Matthew Grishman: Whatever your path may look like, our purpose is to make sure that your way forward aligns with your core values and intentions. Are you ready to start planning for a future that's rich in wealth and well being? Then click like and subscribe and make sure you don't miss a single episode of the whole wealth journey.

Matthew Grishman: So if we've struck a 

Jim Gebhardt: nerve with you 

Matthew Grishman: today, where do people go? You can find us at gebhardtholewealth. com. That's G E B H A R D T wholewealth. com. And once you get there, make sure you connect with us so you can take the first steps to finding your why. We'll see you next time. 

Amy: Jim Gebhardt is a registered representative of and [01:02:00] securities offered through Brokers International Financial Services LLC, member SIPC.

Amy: Jim Gebhardt and Matthew Grishman are investment advisor representatives of Gebhardt Group Incorporated, a registered investment advisor. Brokers International Financial Services LLC and Gebhardt Group Incorporated are not affiliated. The opinions in this podcast are for informational purposes only and are not intended to provide specific advice or investment recommendations.

Amy: To determine which investments or financial advice may be appropriate for you, consult a financial advisor prior to investing. Any reference to market performance is based on historical information and there is no expressed or implied guarantee of future performance. Opinions expressed on this program do not necessarily reflect the market's views.

Amy: those of Brokers International Financial Services, LLC. The topics discussed and opinions given are not intended to address the specific needs of any listener. Gebhardt Group Incorporated does not offer legal or tax advice. Listeners are encouraged to discuss their financial needs with the appropriate professional regarding your [01:03:00] individual circumstance.