Episode 148: Fostering Resilience with Confidence and Clarity.

After a health scares prompted us to reevaluate our priorities, we realized that gratitude, presence, and confidence play crucial roles in nurturing both personal growth and business success. Embracing emotions like fear and sadness without resistance can enhance resilience, allowing us to focus on being grounded in the moment. By weaving personal stories and insights, we explore how living in the now not only boosts self-assurance but also creates a fulfilling life.

For entrepreneurs, having a clear future vision and a succession plan is essential to building a legacy that withstands the test of time. We discuss navigating the unpredictable challenges that life throws our way, particularly the five Ds—death, divorce, distress, disagreement, or diagnosis—and how these can impact business owners. Sharing our journey with Gebhardt Group, we emphasize the importance of readiness and resilience, all while maintaining focus on potential growth opportunities and ensuring our clients' futures remain secure as well.

Balancing personal and business planning is an art form that many entrepreneurs struggle to master. Through relatable stories and practical advice, we underscore the necessity of aligning personal aspirations with business goals. Whether it's carrying insurance for risk management or the importance of exit planning, we share how breaking down larger goals into manageable steps can lead to a balanced and fulfilling life. Join us and our community as we foster open communication and shared growth on this journey, one step at a time.

CHAPTER SUMMARY

(00:00) Gratitude, Confidence, and Focus
Gratitude, presence, and confidence are emphasized as we discuss living in the now, embracing emotions, and finding clarity and purpose.

(11:51) Future Vision and Succession Planning
Entrepreneurs need a clear vision and purpose, must navigate challenges, prepare for unforeseen changes, and plan for growth.

(17:11) Risk Management and Exit Planning
Managing risks through insurance, exit planning, and personal/business growth are crucial for entrepreneurs.

(22:03) Building Value Through Intangible Capitals
Exit planning creates value in business, emphasizing personal readiness and the role of the Clarity Compass tool.

(33:14) Balancing Personal and Business Planning
Entrepreneurs often prioritize their businesses over personal lives, but aligning goals can lead to a more fulfilling life.

(45:53) Taking One Step at a Time
Confidence, presence, energy, manageable steps, awareness, communication, support, growth in our journey towards our vision.

You can learn more about The Whole Wealth Journey by visiting The Gebhardt Group. You can follow us on Instagram @thewholewealthjourney

Transcript

Matthew Grishman: [00:00:00] 50 percent of all business owners are going to come in contact with one of the five D's, right? Death, divorce, distress, distress, disagreement, or diagnosis one and two. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. 50 percent 

Matthew Grishman: 50 percent right. And you're going to be forced to make a business decision if you are unprepared. 

Jim Gebhardt: Right.

Welcome to the whole wealth journey. 

Matthew Grishman: Wealth with a Y. What does that mean? What does that mean? Are we spelling it? Funny? No, I think we're using the word. Why the word? Why? Okay, not the letter. Why the actual word? Why? 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, I know why. Why? Because we want to help people get on their path. Then the path is all about their why.

Matthew Grishman: And it's about aligning your finances with you. The people, the experience, and the passions that 

Jim Gebhardt: give their lives [00:01:00] true meaning. It's getting way beyond the bank statements, the brokerage statements, the trust documents, the life insurance, and taking a deeper dive into your why. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, admittedly, we're not for everyone.

This is different. We're for the bold ones who really want to dive deeper and seek a life that resonates with who they really are at their core. Who finds value in vulnerability. 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, 

Matthew Grishman: you and I do 

Jim Gebhardt: you and I do and that's where we want to play, but not everybody is comfortable with that vulnerability.

Matthew Grishman: Maybe we should introduce ourselves. What do you think? Oh, that's a good idea. Jim Gebhardt and I'm Matthew Grishman. We are the co creators of the podcast, The Whole Wealth Journey. Ready to find your why? Then let's get started and get you one step closer to unlocking your inner wealth and well being.

Jim Gebhardt: What are you grateful for today? What am I grateful for today? No, you. What are you grateful for? 

Matthew Grishman: What are you grateful for today? You know what I'm saying? What am I grateful for [00:02:00] today?

I'm grateful for where my feet are at right now. I'm grateful that I can look down and see where my feet are at and feel really, really good about where I am right now. I'm super grateful that I know how to get in the present moment. I'm super grateful for my health. I'm super grateful for where you and I have been recently and where we are right now.

It's cool. It just, I love this feeling of just being comfortable in my own skin and being grounded where my feet are right now and not consumed with where we've been and where we're going. I feel like there has been so much fence straddling lately. One foot in the past, one foot in the future. With this hope that we're going to change the past and somehow that's going to influence the future.

And the more you and I just anchor to the current moment and what's going on right now and what's in front of us right now and the opportunity that's right here in front of us [00:03:00] now, uh, the more confidence I feel. You've always said our primary responsibility to each other is to protect one another's confidence.

Jim Gebhardt: Absolutely. 

Matthew Grishman: And I feel like And that of our 

Jim Gebhardt: team, and that of our clients, and that of our family Yes. But it starts 

Matthew Grishman: here. Oh, of course. It starts here. We practice here. Of course. And then as we, you know, screw up and have human experiences and we learn from it, we get better at it and then we get to go share it with others.

So there's something else I'm grateful for is the trust that you and I have reestablished in being able to be vulnerable with one another. To make mistakes. And to be okay with that, because I feel like you and I are, like, in 

Jim Gebhardt: lockstep 

Matthew Grishman: in a direction again. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: Right? Like, there's our mountain. Let's go take it.

Right. And everything else is a distraction. 

Jim Gebhardt: How does that affect your confidence? 

Matthew Grishman: It strengthens it. 

Jim Gebhardt: Right. Do you think most people are feeling confident right now? In 2020, early in [00:04:00] 2025? Oof. 

Matthew Grishman: Most. Most? Many. I don't think many people are. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: I think that there are lots of, like, fakes. Like, we can fake it.

We can fake our confidence. But that really just kind of comes across as cocky. Right. It's not a, it's not a real confidence. And what does that mean? When I feel confident, what does that mean? Like, it's, we say these words. We share these concepts, but what does it actually look like? What does it actually feel like?

How do we actually describe what that is? What that feels like? And for me, what it means to feel more confident is that I find myself here, in this moment, without my brain trickling into, what did I just say? Oh my god, did I just make a fool out of myself? Right, I'm not constantly looking back and checking myself and worrying and wondering.

Am I doing the right thing because I have to do the [00:05:00] right thing to make sure that you like me and give me all the approval in the world that I need, and at the same time, I'm not one foot into tomorrow worrying about what may or may not come. Because all we've ever learned about that kind of worry is that it's not going to change any of those outcomes out there, it's just going to screw up how I feel today.

So as I've let go of that worry, out there, I just feel like I'm here, I'm present more. That to me is what confidence feels like. When I can be in the moment without having to change the way I feel from the neck up with thoughts or substances or food or anything, any distraction, that's what confidence feels like to me.

It's, it's distraction proof. It's a, it's a superpower that we can all learn and access. That allows us to be more distraction proof. 

Jim Gebhardt: The word that I think of when you say distraction proof is focus. 

Matthew Grishman: There's a little brevity for ya. 

Jim Gebhardt: The focus is self affirming to the confidence. The [00:06:00] focus is driving the confidence.

Matthew Grishman: I 

Jim Gebhardt: think 

Matthew Grishman: the confidence is driving the focus. But which came first, the chicken or the egg? 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, where I'm going with this is, and you're walking into my, my mousetrap. Feels more like a lobster 

Matthew Grishman: trap. You're not going to let me out. It is a little bit of a lobster trap. I can get out of a mousetrap. I can't get out of a lobster trap.

Jim Gebhardt: And this goes to one of the core principles by which I've tried to build and run and operate this business before you showed up with you is when you have clarity in your life. Another word for that could be focus. Right? Lack of distraction. 

Matthew Grishman: Clarity provides focus, for sure. 

Jim Gebhardt: So when you have that clarity of direction, of purpose, of service, of whatever, it automatically is the energy for your confidence.

Your confidence goes up because when you lack the focus, when you lack the clarity of direction, like you and I have at times, most recently, in the last few years, it [00:07:00] erodes your confidence. And That is so awesome to hear how you're feeling about being hyper present. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Thank you. I mean, it feels great.

I know I'm still a human being, though. I know fear is still in there. Right? It's right around the corner. Fear and sadness and all these, like, oopy feelings that we get. Sure, 

Jim Gebhardt: sure. 

Matthew Grishman: Right? 

Jim Gebhardt: But you're also, when you're confident, you're more resilient to that. 

Matthew Grishman: I think you just process them differently because they, they're part of being human and to just allow fear and sadness to exist.

Without trying to change it. This is where being present is all about, that confidence booster for me is like, when I have these feelings, which I had last night, you know, sitting at home last night. Stuff went down in my house that, you know, created some feelings. And old me, who didn't really like feelings, would, at a minimum, get up and leave the room.

Because of how somebody else in my house was behaving. I was [00:08:00] uncomfortable. I felt this, like, anxiety thing in my chest. I didn't like it. And again, old me would just get up and leave the room. Really old me would get up, leave the room, and find a fifth of something and, you know, really make this a better situation, right?

Instead, I just, I sat there and I just let my feeling be. What it is, let that person be what they're going to be and the feeling came and the feeling went and I stayed present in the moment and didn't let it take me out of the moment or down the road. It's like, okay, you do what you got to do. I'm here.

I'll continue the conversation when you're ready. 

Jim Gebhardt: Right. 

Matthew Grishman: And the feelings were there and the feelings came and the feelings went. It was lovely. Yeah. I just, I got to be present. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: That, to me, is how I feel more confident. When people say to me, What does it feel like? to feel confident. It's not a, a pounding my chest and, you know, I'm feeling invincible.

It, that's kind of the other side of a little bit of false pride [00:09:00] when I wasn't feeling as confident, right? That's another form of a lack of confidence to me is this like compensation, like this grandiosity of look at me. I mean, you know, look at, look at this right here, right? That's not confidence to me.

Confidence is almost like a neutrality. It's like this, this feeling of just being neutral. 

Jim Gebhardt: I'm good. I'm good. Right, which to the concept in my mind of resilience Yeah. is the resistance can come, but it's going to wash away because of your confidence. Yes. Not in a braggadocious kind of way, not in an egotistical kind of way, just a, no, I'm good.

Yeah. Well. And it washes in and it washes out. Much like a wave at the beach. Comes and it goes. Well, this has been a great show. And that's a wrap. It's been fabulous. 

Matthew Grishman: It's been fabulous. How, how is your gratitude today? What, what are you, what are you feeling some waves of gratitude over today? 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, I'm going to go absolutely counter to the culture with what you just said.

I'm going to go to the past [00:10:00] and I'm going to go to the future. Beautiful. I am grateful for the time we spent last week together as kind of the leadership team of our firm. You, me, and Allison getting away as we do every January, early February to go opine on the direction of what we're doing. That's a good word.

And I've always known the importance of taking time away from the business to work on the business, because much like darkness and light can't occupy the same space at the same time, you can't really work on your business in your business. Amen. It's just, I don't know what it is about that, I just can't do it.

And I know a lot of people that can't do it. And I am always, it always reaffirms my confidence in that time away, because our time last week was so impactful, and so clarifying, and so motivating. And where that leads to the future, since you're holding the space for today, and being in the present. is the future [00:11:00] direction of what we do for our clients is now at a level of clarity that makes me more confident.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: It is a level of clarity in the direction of who we want to serve best, what we want to do for them, how we want to deliver it, that reignites a spark in me because after I'm rounding the corner, you and I are both rounding the corner to 30 years in this business. And in dog years, that's 210 years in this business.

And we're front and center in another time and place on the planet where there is a tremendous amount of chaos. Internally, externally, I don't mean within our business, I mean within our country. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: Internally and externally. Sure. And 

Matthew Grishman: Has there ever really been a time where there wasn't? 

Jim Gebhardt: No. But that's the, that's the silliness about it, is that it's, no, that's a, that's a really good point, is that the chaos has always been there.

Always. Yeah. It's always been the [00:12:00] threat, right? And the old comments about, well, you know, the, you know, Jim and Matthew, this time it's different. Sure. Well, it's different only in title, in context, in headline. People, characters. The rest is not, there's no difference. The feelings are the same. The feelings are all the same.

Fear. Fear. Uncertainty. Anxiety. Worry. Uncertainty. We just did a show, ladies and gentlemen, that talked about where we were a year ago in early 2024 and what we felt like going into 2024. And all the fear, uncertainty, worry, all that. Here we are, rinse and repeat, in early 2025 with much the same, but I can say that our time last week and some of the clarifying conversations that we've had as a team, you and me, and Allison and Lindsey and everybody, is that refuels my tank to go slay the next dragon.

Matthew Grishman: Nice. 

Jim Gebhardt: And that's what you need, [00:13:00] because if there ever comes a day where, you know, our tank is empty and we can't refuel it, We're out of gas, folks. Yeah. That's it. Yeah. And I, I mean, as I've shared with you, I was in a funk for a while, right? And to be on the other side of that funk and it just kind of, it went away.

Well, some of it comes from the habits and the actions that you and I have developed over the years. Sure. And getting away like that is important. My time at strategic coach every quarter is important. My fitness is important. All of those things are working to. helping me be a, you know, like your Ted talk, right?

Keep investing in me and I'm going to be the best goddamn version of myself. I can be 

Matthew Grishman: exactly, I think what your funk was all about was that you were doing all these great things. We're doing all these great things, but what is it that. And our tribe, I mean, come on, guys, you're, you're listening and, and I know this is landing with you.

What is it that we entrepreneurs must have in our lives for [00:14:00] all of that to mean something? And this isn't scripted. So come on. 

Jim Gebhardt: Are you going to let them answer? 

Matthew Grishman: No, I'm waiting. You're going to answer for them. 

Jim Gebhardt: I, I don't, I'm blank. 

Matthew Grishman: What is it that the folks at East West told you you should have on your schedule that you should be working towards?

What is that? What did they say? What was the suggestion? Your health training for what an event entrepreneurs have to have something to shoot at. Oh, yeah. Sure. 

Jim Gebhardt: Okay, 

Matthew Grishman: right? There has to be a target. There has to be a vision. There has to be what are we doing this for? Right. This can't just be we show up to work and go through these motions.

No, there's got to be a purpose There's got to be a purpose and for so long 20 year vision that we were following and it kind of got changed it it What morphed 82 times, right? And we never really had this ultimate vision that we were going towards, this, you know, what, what is this thing, this ideal, this rainbow out there that maybe we can never truly get [00:15:00] to, but at least it gives us a North Star that we're walking towards.

And the, the funk that you've been in was the ultimate form of resistance showing up and making you pause and figure that out. What is that? Because we can't just keep going through these motions, and showing up, and reacting to what the world 

Jim Gebhardt: And expecting 

Matthew Grishman: different results. Well, reacting to whatever shows up for the day, right?

We've been in reaction mode for a long time. We're, we're looking at what's going on in the world. We're coming into the studio and talking about it. We're showing up to work every day. We're, we're seeing what our clients need from us today, which is very valuable. It's important work that we're doing for people.

But you and I as entrepreneurs need to have an offense as well as a defense. We need to have something that we're out there looking at. That's our guiding light every single day. And it's been percolating. And we felt it, and now we know what it is. 

Jim Gebhardt: Fantastic. We should probably tell the tribe. 

Matthew Grishman: And we are.

We are. [00:16:00] We're here. You talk about this excitement you have over our future, what I love about this, this future thing that we're driving toward, which is ultimately the succession plan of our business, right? But not in terms of it's out there. Right? Bo taught us years ago, that if we want to be the very best in the world at something, go look at who is the very best in the world at it now.

And go be that now. Go bring that into existence into your life today. 

Jim Gebhardt: Thanks, Bo. 

Matthew Grishman: That was the first time we ever heard that. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: And we forgot a little bit. And now we've seen it again. Well, because 

Jim Gebhardt: it works so well. 

Matthew Grishman: Right. Absolutely. Right? Absolutely. I think we needed to see it in the shape of our universe, our little entrepreneurial universe.

Yeah. Where all of a sudden, okay, where, where are we going? We, we have this incredible thing called Gebhardt Group that we want it to be a real legacy that extends beyond just [00:17:00] you and me. So what, what happens to Gebhardt Group when it's not you and me anymore? And that becomes what we're shooting at. Is creating An environment within our firm that is prepared for that whenever it comes, right?

You, you and I just had the scare of a lifetime with your health, with my, more with my health, little bit with your health. Sure. But that was something that kind of forced us to start looking at this a little bit. 

Jim Gebhardt: Oh, that's the hidden blessing in it. 

Matthew Grishman: Unbelievable that 50 percent of all business owners are going to come in contact with one of the five D's, right?

Death, divorce, Distress, Distress. Disagreement or diagnosis? One in two. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah, fifty percent. 

Matthew Grishman: Fifty percent. Right. And you're going to be forced to make a business decision if you are unprepared. 

Jim Gebhardt: Right. Right. Where the timing is not going to be ideal. No. How about Can we add one other stat to that while we're rolling stats out?

Sure. Sure. is 80 percent of an [00:18:00] entrepreneur's net worth is tied up in that business. Oh boy. So now you're taking 80 percent of your net worth and trying to do something with it in a bad timing environment. Yes. That doesn't sound ideal to me. No. 

Matthew Grishman: No. So, I mean, you and I getting all sorts of clarity on how does Gebhardt Group go way beyond you and me and become a, become our legacy, even though that's years away.

In a perfect world. That's years and years down the road. 

Jim Gebhardt: But 

Matthew Grishman: something Bo taught us, and something we've learned again recently, is how do we bring that version of Gebhardt Group into existence today? And what that winds up looking like, today, is it, it just, it puts us on a path that if one of these Ds do show up and we do have to pivot, we're prepared for it.

We're prepared for that next generation. At the same token, if those Ds don't show up, And Gebhardt group is as healthy as it's ever been and we're Looking towards that future and we decide we want to [00:19:00] keep growing, we're also prepared for that. You and I have been out there learning a whole bunch of cool stuff.

Jim Gebhardt: And in a simpler analogy, you have fire insurance, right? Yep. You have car insurance? Yep. Homeowner's insurance? Uh, 

Matthew Grishman: yep. 

Jim Gebhardt: Life insurance? Well, 

Matthew Grishman: homeowner's insurance mostly. Yep. Today, right? 

Jim Gebhardt: We have it today. Right. Life insurance. Yep. And, um, the other one I was thinking of was an umbrella policy, personal liability policy, right?

Why do we carry all of these different insurances? And I always have been curious why that's the word, you carry insurance, like you're bringing it with you in your wheelbarrow or your backpack. 

Matthew Grishman: Uh, the reason they, that you carry insurance is because you are carrying risk. And the process of insurance is about trade.

Jim Gebhardt: What about, but I don't want to carry the risk anymore. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, you're not. You're carrying a much smaller risk. True, 

Jim Gebhardt: by having the insurance. 

Matthew Grishman: You offload what that big risk is that you're carrying, right? All of those Harible [00:20:00] things you just talked about. Yep. Right fire and death and disability and you know brain and liability and all these things that can just financially wipe a business out like that Right those huge risks that you're shouldering you offload that risk and allow a much bigger much more profitable financially secure entity carry that unknown risk for you in exchange for A much smaller, lesser, known risk, called a premium.

That's why you carry insurance. And congratulations To you. To you, uh, my business partner who's not only a certified financial planner, but now a certified exit planning advisor, or what we call a SEPA. 

Jim Gebhardt: Right. And vice versa. Right. Most recently, fresh off the press, with your own designation last week. 

Matthew Grishman: Yes.

This is just going to be a huge, a huge opportunity for all of us. For all of us as business owners, as entrepreneurs, to envision [00:21:00] a future version of ourselves. with the legacy we want to create and bring it into existence today. It's awesome. 

Jim Gebhardt: It is awesome. And so much of that is the fact that, as our friends at the Exit Planning Institute like to talk about, is the concept of exit planning, it feels, for most business owners feels it's a very future y kind of thing.

Sure. Like, you know, I got, I'll get to that. I got, I got other stuff to do, but I'll get to that. Right. Whereas in reality, the concept of preparing your business for sale, whether it's two years from now or ten years from now, is simply good business strategy. For today. Because it's ultimately going to enhance the value of your business today because you're going to tighten up the bolts and the nuts and the screws.

That make your readiness, God forbid one of the five D's happens, or like you said, it's the time has come and you're ready to, you know, transition it out or in to the next generation. [00:22:00] You're prepared. How many stories could we tell that aren't necessarily business specific, but how much better people feel when they're prepared?

Matthew Grishman: Oh. 

Jim Gebhardt: And I, as your business partner, It's us. Will raise my hand as the guilty party Yeah. It's kryptonite for me when I don't feel prepared. So, I would imagine we've got some entrepreneurs that are listening to this that feel a little bit of an ache. Like, oh shit, I, I gotta, I gotta get on this. I can't, I can't take the risk.

I mean, 80 percent of, they're right, 80 percent of my net worth is tied up in this thing. I can't put this off. I gotta get in motion on this. And so much of that is this concept that we knew it, we knew it ourselves, but the exit planning folks just put it in a really nice context of the concept of this three legged stool.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. Yeah, absolutely. 

Jim Gebhardt: And the three legged stool being the business, your personal finances, and [00:23:00] then your own personal planning. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. As far as creating priorities and how to. Go about what the ultimate goal is. I mean, you, you and I, before we even get into that, what I appreciate is, is you and I have always felt.

Because of the business we're in that as entrepreneurs, when in doubt, grow yourself out. Right? No matter what. You and I have always had a certain amount of confidence in the fact that, hey, we know how to make money. Right? That's what's great about being an entrepreneur. So let's just go out and make more money.

Right. Right. Let's focus on, on growing this, bringing in new clients. Yes. Let's shush up the website. Let's get out there, do some seminars. Let's, you and I can sell our asses off. Yes. And we're great at it because we're passionate in what we do for people. So we can go out and talk to a wrong number for three days about What we do for people where this becomes different.

And you and I have spent years trying to grow ourselves out of our different little puddles of poop. We step in what we finally figured out and realized, thanks to our friends in the exit planning Institute is that this isn't about. [00:24:00] Growing and creating more income for your business. Because that's good for you and me.

Sure. Right? Income's good for you and me, but what's great for our business is to create value. To increase the value of our business. Because if we increase the value of our business, that's probably going to create more income. Not just for you and me, but for everybody within the business. Right. And so this idea of bringing exit planning into existence today has this singular goal.

of creating more value. And what I really appreciate, we're gonna introduce the tribe to some new friends of ours, uh, the Snyders, Chris and Scott Snyder, who own the Exit Planning Institute. Who 

Jim Gebhardt: we will have on the show one day. 

Matthew Grishman: We will most certainly invite to be guests here. I love how Chris breaks down the process of exit planning.

It, it, cause like, uh, it just, it's gotta be simple, right? And, and he created this kind of simple mathematical formula of 5, 5, 4, 3, 2, 1. [00:25:00] And I'm someone who always likes to read the end of the book first to make sure it's something I really want to invest in, where that one represents the singular value, or the singular goal of exit planning is about driving value, about increasing the value of our firm.

Part of how we do that, where the three you started to talk about is I got excited. Yeah, I know. That's okay. It's an exciting thing to get excited about. I found out I had to go in for open heart surgery. It exposed three very important areas of my life that needed tending to. One was our business. We had to look at our business agreements, our buy sell agreements.

Making sure our insurance was paid up, because if I didn't come out of that surgery, that was going to really change the face of the ownership of Gebhardt Group. What were the risk management tools that we had in place to deal with that? And thank God you helped me figure out that there were two other very important things that we probably needed to help you get prepared with.

[00:26:00] Number one, your finances. Your personal finances. As Gebhardt Group, let's get your financial and legal house in order. 

Jim Gebhardt: And what do you mean by legal? Like all your outstanding lawsuits? Right. Of which there are none? I wish I even had one to brag about. I know, I know. How boring. 

Matthew Grishman: I get to be that person who falls on his sword and as much as I've told my clients how important it is to have a trust and have your legal house in order, I was that guy who had not updated his trust since Pretty much my oldest son was a year old.

We had an outdated trust from the state of Washington where Miles was a year old. We had powers of attorney where people had powers over us who were not alive anymore. And we had guardianship on our only child. Now granted, we have Lucas and we never updated anything once Lucas was born. So here we were walking around with Outdated estate planning documents.

They 

Jim Gebhardt: have a TV show for that. 

Matthew Grishman: Uh huh. What's it called? 

Jim Gebhardt: Naked and Afraid. 

Matthew Grishman: There you go. Yeah, I could be the [00:27:00] main star on that show for that episode. And so we had a fire drill of redoing our trust, getting it in order, now including our boys in a completely different way because they're grown men now. So we gave them powers of attorney to help us make decisions when we can't.

It was so important to focus on that. And then the third part. About my personal planning. How are you going to deal with all of this on the other side? And although we had no idea what was to come, you created the space for me to figure that out and be able to attend to my personal needs and try to figure out what's next for me and what that, because you can't game plan that.

No, you can't. Right? 

Jim Gebhardt: You can't. There's no, there's no amount of preparation. No. Other than to have some understanding and agreements. Right. On, take all the time you need. Right. Because you don't, you don't know if you're, I mean, I, I, I have a [00:28:00] friend that had your same procedure, and within a month, he was back in action.

Uh huh. He didn't have the pericarditis and everything else that you, you went through. And so you can't possibly pregame that. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, we did a little bit, right? And one of the tools that we have at Gebhardt Group that we use with our clients is called the Clarity Compass. The Clarity Compass was at least a tool that allowed me to get very clear on what mattered most to me.

So that when I did wake up on the other side, and thank God I did, that at least I was clear on the fact that the four things that mattered most to me in my life were number one, my connection and my people. Number two, my health. Number three, my faith. And number four, my sense of adventure. And those four core values and, and what those actually look like in my life, right?

I, I needed an action plan that would at least tell me this is what this currently looks like in your life. These are what these four values [00:29:00] could look like in your life if you're willing to take a little bit of action and make it happen. But ultimately, it helped connect the three legs of those stool, of that stool, together.

And so, I felt so much more confident going into that surgery knowing that my business affairs, my personal affairs, and my personal financial affairs were all equally important and attended to. And buttoned up. And buttoned up. So imagine if we get to do that ahead of time. As an entrepreneur, as a business owner.

Without a diagnosis. Right. Getting those three legs of the stool coordinated and in alignment with one another. And having a plan. That ties that all together. 

Jim Gebhardt: So, going into September 8th, right? Going into Operation Day. Yep. While there may have been other anxieties in the room. You were at peace knowing that everything on outside of that was buttoned up.[00:30:00] 

Matthew Grishman: Absolutely. Absolutely. Because one of the things that it also exposed when you and I were buttoning up the business side of things, and we hadn't learned this yet. We've since learned this from the Snyders going through The value acceleration methodology and the whole exit planning process is that when we were looking at the value of Gebhardt Group, right, and what my ownership represented and what we would need to protect that and if something happened to me, how are you gonna, you know, are you, is Amy gonna become your new business partner or, you know, do we wanna try to pay her what the ownership is worth and, you know, let her go do her?

Right. Realizing what the value of Gebhardt Group really is. We, we spend a lot of time looking at our balance sheet, our profit and loss statement, and we love those numbers. What's incredible is that 80 percent of the value of our business doesn't show up on either of those documents. I'm sorry, 

Jim Gebhardt: I'm sorry, I didn't hear that.

Could you say that again, please? 

Matthew Grishman: 80 percent of the value of a closely held business, of any [00:31:00] business, is something that doesn't show up anywhere on a balance sheet or a P& L statement. I'm curious. They are intangible capitals. There are four of them. These four intangible capitals that every business in the world has.

And that's your human capital. Your people. There's your structural capital, which is your systems, your operations, how you do things, how well you're documented. There's your customer capital. Do you have all your eggs in one basket or do you have a good diverse customer base? And then of course there's your social capital.

What's your culture like? What do you mean to your community? How does what you create affect those around you? And when you look at those four intangible capitals that represent 80 percent of the value of your business, have you taken the time to become world class, best in class in all four of those categories?

And if you're not. That's okay. 

Jim Gebhardt: That's okay, [00:32:00] because that's some of the hidden, the hidden gems. 

Matthew Grishman: That's the work. Mm hmm. The work is how do we look at these four different intangible capitals and become absolute best in class in all four of these categories so that at any given time the attractiveness of our firm relative to how outside firms may see us is like, ooh, we'd like to buy those people.

That's, that'd be a lovely little, uh, Connection, right? So this idea of being attractive and always being ready by focusing on those four intangible capitals and having a plan that not only. focuses on improving the strength of those four intangible capitals, but also aligning that with how you're addressing your own personal finances and this personal path of if the day comes where I am out, what do I want to be?

What am I going to do? What's my plan? 

Jim Gebhardt: And you and I know from first hand [00:33:00] experience, and you don't need to be necessarily a successful entrepreneur to experience this. When you've devoted yourself to a career for decades, so often the identity, your identity is tied to that profession. Right. So. 

Matthew Grishman: And what happens when you tie your identity to that profession to the personal side of your identity?

Jim Gebhardt: Well, right. 

Matthew Grishman: What happens to it? 

Jim Gebhardt: It, it, it vaporizes, right? I, reluctant to use the word easier, but the, the business planning, the business strategy around that to go work on the four C's and some of that I think is, is very procedural. Financial planning can be very procedural. Yep. Right? Where it gets to be a little bit more of a gray fuzzy area is on the personal planning.

And this is something I'm extraordinarily proud of, the work that you and I have done with clients for a decade now together, is helping them with [00:34:00] that. Because it is such, such an unknown for so many people that have been tied to their work, right? And you and I are thinking in our heads right now of certain people where Their identity was their profession, right?

You might even be related to some people like this. I might 

Matthew Grishman: be I might I might have a couple of who's who in my lives that are very afraid of what happens when they go from who's who to who's he? 

Jim Gebhardt: And again, it goes back to that clarity conversation, right? And that clarity that we help clients with through the Clarity Compass exercise is what is going to give them confidence to go explore their new capabilities.

Absolutely. Right? And that's the work that you and I absolutely love to do. Yes. Those are the most, you know, is this a word? Epiphanal? 

Matthew Grishman: Sure, it is now. Okay. 

Jim Gebhardt: The most epiphanal moments. Sorry, Kevin. When we see that happen with clients, that they can start to envision a life [00:35:00] after the J O B, after the career.

I had a conversation with our long time client, John, on their way up here today. Who's like, hey, could you, uh, could you refresh the numbers a little bit? I'm, I'm getting an itch. I'm getting an itch to wave the flag. He's a corporate guy. He's not an entrepreneur. And I'm like, well, you know, John, you can hit the pause button anytime you want.

We've said this before, but I'm going to say it again to you. You ain't done. You haven't made your last dollar. You've just, you're probably done making a dollar the way you've been making the dollar. Right? Which is working for somebody else. And you've told me a number of times about your brother who retired from a big oil producer that now consults back to that producer in a way that his life is just like, dreamy.

I said, so use that as your playbook. Apply it to what you do. And I think you're going to wave the white flag sooner. He's like, oh, I'm so glad I called you today. Like, call me any day. Sure. You have my cell phone number. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: Right? [00:36:00] That clarity, when you get, oh my god, it is so intoxicating. When, on the personal planning, they can get in motion and they can start to see what comes after we build the, the dream house and fill in the blank.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, absolutely. 

Jim Gebhardt: Right? We have clients right now that are not building one, they're building two dream houses. Right. A couple hours apart. That's what they want. Virtual, virtually simultaneously. Yes. And my concern for them is, what's next? What happens after that's done? Because if anybody's ever built anything in the, in the land of home, it takes a lot.

It takes a lot of your energy and focus and time and money. And then when that's done, you're like, okay, well, okay, what am I gonna play pickleball the rest of my life? 

Matthew Grishman: Well, for this client, the, the big concern is, is that there isn't an overall vision that's driving this. This is about something that satisfies a need in us today, but is there a vision that's really [00:37:00] driving this?

And, and we're starting to have These types of conversations. I mean, this idea of being able to plan and have these, these three legs of the stool, which really, when it boils down, creates these two concurrent paths of an entrepreneur putting as much focus on their personal planning as they do on their business planning.

And this, this process of getting certified in this world and getting a hell of an education. Has taught us, and for me it's been a validation process. 100%. That most entrepreneurs. completely ignore the personal side of their planning for the benefit of the business side of the planning. There's this Why is that, Bob?

Well, there's this overdrive of, it's a version of selflessness that has, it's kind of a weird balance between a selfish, selfless, thing that's just this driven, I'm building something and it's all about this and my people and the customers I serve and the [00:38:00] employees I'm responsible for and carrying this incredible weight of responsibility that I never have time to even think about looking at my own personal finances.

And I'll tell you, as a guy who wrote a book called Financial Sobriety about my train wreck of a relationship that I've had for years in my own personal finances. To realize that that's a common plight of the entrepreneur, that I've been so focused on, how can I go out and help others? Granted, it made me feel good.

Right? If I could go out and build something and create something that helped other people, what I'm finding is how many more people in our industry, in the financial services industry, who are wired like us, who are entrepreneurs, who've built something special, how many of them are cobblers whose kids don't have shoes?

Where they do such exquisite work taking care of other people, yet their own financial house, their own legal [00:39:00] house, is not in order. The fact that I came into My open heart surgery that way, the fact that most of my life, I ignored that side of my net worth and to feel not alone in that space anymore, that I'm not the only entrepreneur who's been so focused on his business that he's put all of that aside.

And now all of a sudden we have a process for addressing that and it's okay. Right? It's, it's okay. Hey, look, we're, we're, we're going to go through a little bit of a, of an identification process here. We're going to do a little discovery. We're going to unpack a little bit of where you are, right? There's a process behind this.

I said, 5, We've been kind of jumping around it a little bit. But where that starts is this idea of identifying where you are. And that's hard. It's hard to look at. And initially, I know when you and I have done this exercise, it hurts. Yikes, it [00:40:00] exposes the risks within the business, it exposes the inefficiencies, the, the we're not good enough part, right, where, where we can very quickly go down that rabbit hole.

Oh, yeah. But what we've learned to do through this process is immediately convert those gaps into gains, into opportunities. Because that's the whole essence of the exit planning path, is to see where you are, identify where you are, see what it is to be best in class three years, five years, ten years from now.

And create the action plan to do it. And put a master plan in place. Yeah. That puts equal. Alignment between your personal and business plan so that you can ultimately get there. 

Jim Gebhardt: I grew up the ankle biter of an entrepreneur that did the same thing. Yes. And dad's focus was always on the business. Because, and we've heard this from many entrepreneurs that we've worked with over the years.

If, if I don't make sure that the business operates and is [00:41:00] thriving, the rest doesn't matter. And I myself have at times been very guilty of that. Sure. Right, where I put my own health and my own fitness and my own nutrition and my own all on the back burner because, you know, I, I got to run into the burning building and take care of my clients.

It is, I think, by nature how entrepreneurs are wired. But it's also a complete imbalance because of exactly the story that you shared with us about going into the operating room. is you were completely out of balance. While the business and everything was working, right? And we sure there were things that we needed to attend to there, your personal financial situation and your personal plan post surgery was non existent.

Right. Right? Right, didn't exist. And we have seen that time and time again. And we've also, we're big believers in this concept that you don't have to get all of this done today. You don't have to get the anchor all the way up in the boat. In order to get this done, to get in motion. 

Matthew Grishman: Huge elephant. 

Jim Gebhardt: You just have to, how do you [00:42:00] eat the elephant?

One bite at a time. How do you move the boat forward? You just gotta get the anchor up an inch. An inch. Yep. And wherever you are in this process. If you're feeling a level of ache, you're feeling a level of overwhelm, you're feeling a stressed out edness that you're like, God damn it, these guys just like blew my day up.

I was feeling great until I listened to this. That's not the point. The point is that you can get in motion. on any of these, but this whole concept of it's a, it's their concurrent paths. You don't do one at the expense of the other, right? You can't focus too much on the per that's a balancing act, right?

And by giving yourself the grace of time and doing these things well in advance of either your own desire to raise your hand and say, you know what, it's time to sell versus. The impact of being in a situation similar to what you were in where one of the 5Ds showed up. 50 percent of us are going to see that.

Well, then you don't have any [00:43:00] time. 

Matthew Grishman: Yes. 

Jim Gebhardt: You've lost the grace of having the time to be able to plan. To be able to, I don't know, how about upgrade your team to the caliber that you're operating at today because maybe, maybe your CPA was your college roommate. Maybe your estate planner is Uncle Harry who's 82 years old, right?

And there's a whole process that has to happen with you just upgrading your team because of where you are today. Well, 

Matthew Grishman: why are we doing this, Jim? What's the whole point? What, why is this so important? Why is upgrading the team and doing this planning work and thinking about exit planning all so very important?

You alluded to it already. Where's our entire net worth? 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah, our, uh, tied up in the business, right? 80 percent of our 

Matthew Grishman: net worth is tied up in the business. So if the goal one day is to be able to harvest that wealth and maximize that wealth and leverage that wealth to create a legacy, this is a must, this kind of planning work.

Jim Gebhardt: It's a must, and unfortunately, [00:44:00] most business owners think their business is worth more than it actually is. 

Matthew Grishman: Right, well, and we So we 

Jim Gebhardt: got 

Matthew Grishman: a 

Jim Gebhardt: problem 

Matthew Grishman: there. Right, our little baby here that They say as an ugly baby, but yeah, I get it. 

Jim Gebhardt: And again, that's where the gift of time can solve all of that. Yes. Because if you have the clarity of knowing where you are today, and what the business is worth today, whether you like it or not, is you're going to get a series of action steps to be able to start to improve that business.

With a process and a methodology that's proven. And a team. And your team is now going to be harnessed, both your internal team and your external team of advisors and consultants are going to be harnessed in that direction. Because guess what? They all speak the same language. They all speak this methodology through the Estate Planning Institute.

That is a well worn path. Exit Planning Institute. What did I say? 

Matthew Grishman: Estate Planning Institute. Oh, 

Jim Gebhardt: pardon me. I went to an estate planning breakfast today. Oh, there you go. That'll do it. The [00:45:00] Exit Planning Institute. I was like, 

Matthew Grishman: holy shit. We didn't just completely change careers in the middle of a podcast episode, did we?

Because I don't want to go to law school. Me neither. SEPA training was enough. Right. Holy 

Jim Gebhardt: cow. So it's very exciting because the level of overwhelm that someone might have is, is fixable. is addressable because we can start to help them get in motion with just an assessment of what team do you have today.

Where are you? Where are you? 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, that's, that's step one. That's 

Jim Gebhardt: Maybe they've never done any financial planning or maybe they've done financial planning but like a couple we met with recently, it'd been like 15 years since they've updated anything financially. Sure. And I was like, huh? 

Matthew Grishman: That's where I was.

Jim Gebhardt: You haven't looked at your brokerage accounts with Eddie Jones in 15 years? Well, no, we just, yeah, then, and you could feel their energy go into it. And I was not trying to put any shame into the room, but you could feel how their energy shifted to shame around the fact that these two [00:46:00] very successful husband and wife, very successful entrepreneurs, had neglected, is the word, their multi million dollar portfolio.

Sure. And it doesn't surprise me anymore when I come across those situations. And I said, okay, well, where would you like to start with that? Well, we're going to get you the statements and we want your critical opinion. Okay, great. Terrific. Right? Upload the statements. We'll go start to do our, our thing.

And it will, in our planning process. We will get to the point with their portfolio where we're going to do all kinds of assessment work, but just helping them get in motion, you could feel they flipped back into, Okay, yeah, this feels good. I like this. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. When somebody can sit down and have an honest dialogue about this little concept we call wealth gap, right, understanding the difference between where their ideal wealth needs to be to support themselves down the road and where they currently stand today.

Becoming aware, like you said, most people [00:47:00] overvalue their business. They think it's worth a lot more than they are. They haven't been paying attention to their personal net worth portfolio. And the business 

Jim Gebhardt: comes first, 

Matthew Grishman: right? The business comes first. So to be able to just sit down and create some awareness about where I am and where I need to go and understand that that's something called a wealth gap, that if we put the right.

plan in place that puts equal attention to the personal side and the business side so that we're ultimately driving more value between both of them. We can close that wealth gap. We can close the value gap between where you think your business should be and where it actually is today with a very simple process that looks like this massive elephant right now, that all we're going to do is take it one bite at a time.

I shared my gratitude. is in this thing called confidence. And I have this confidence, which just kind of feels like I'm here. I'm in the moment. When you and I first started talking about implementing this process for [00:48:00] us, the big question you asked me was, do you have the energy for this? Because I'm not sure I have the energy for this.

I was like, hang on brother, just be here right now, doing what we do today. Let's take one bite out of the elephant today and become very keenly aware of where we are So that we know where we need to go. And then let's put one foot in front of the other and we take one bite of the elephant at a time.

And that is the key to this whole process. So lots more to come, lots more to come. We're having a lot of fun. Just taking that future vision that we're shooting for and bringing it into existence today. So we hope you're ready to do that and bring it into existence for yourself today. If you're a tribe member like us.

Please reach out. In the show notes is a link to send us a text message. Let us know how you feel about where you're at today. Something that maybe rattled a nerve, touched a nerve. Reach out. We'd love to have a conversation. [00:49:00] If you want to pick up the old telephone. What's that? The telephone. Wow. Where we can talk to one another.

Wow. 877 283 9150. And with that my friend, 

Jim Gebhardt: that's a wrap. 

Matthew Grishman: Thanks for joining us today on the Whole Wealth Journey. Whatever your path may look like, our purpose is to make sure that your way forward aligns with your core values and intentions. Are you ready to start planning for a future that's rich and wealth and wellbeing?

Then click like and subscribe and make sure you don't miss a single episode of the whole Wealth journey. So if 

Jim Gebhardt: we've struck a nerve with you today, 

Matthew Grishman: where do people go? You can find us at GebhardtWholeWealth. com. That's G E B H A R D T WholeWealth. com. And once you get there, make sure you connect with us so you can take the first steps to finding your why.

We'll see you next time. 

Amy Bingham: Jim Gebhardt is a [00:50:00] registered representative of and securities offered through Brokers International Financial Services LLC, member SIPC. Jim Gebhardt and Matthew Grishman are investment advisor representatives of Gebhardt Group Incorporated, a registered investment advisor.

Brokers International Financial Services LLC and Gebhardt Group Incorporated are not affiliated. The opinions in this podcast are for informational purposes only and are not intended to provide specific advice or investment recommendations. To determine which investments or financial advice may be appropriate for you, consult a financial advisor prior to investing.

Any reference to market performance is based on historical information and there is no expressed or implied guarantee of future performance. Opinions expressed on this program do not necessarily reflect those of Brokers International Financial Services, LLC. The topics discussed and opinions given are not intended to address the specific needs of any listener.

Gebhardt Group Incorporated does not offer legal or tax advice. Listeners are encouraged to discuss their financial needs with the appropriate [00:51:00] professional regarding your individual circumstance.