Episode 155: Encore Edition. How the Whole Wealth Journey Begins.

This is an encore episode of the introduction to the Whole Wealth Journey process that released previously in August, 2024. It's a good refresher or introduction to your hosts, Matthew Grishman and Jim Gebhardt. Enjoy...

Gratitude is a big part of the Whole Wealth Journey and it’s the staple Jim and Matthew use to kick off each show. But this episode is a bit different. Yes, you'll hear gratitude for a family visit to New York and a bucket-list golf trip to Ireland, but the true purpose of sharing gratitude is revealed … hint … it has nothing to do with money yet everything to do with wealth!

As the conversation continues, Jim can't ignore a recent investment he made in something that left Matthew shocked and (almost) speechless.

Next the fellas dive into the first few elements of The Whole Wealth Journey through the lens of Jim and his wife, Beth, and Matthew and his wife, Amie. The guys reveal what financial security means to them, and what keeps them up at night about money. Their unique perspectives might really surprise you! 

Jim’s and Matthew’s unique stories serve as a gateway to a broader discussion on how childhood experiences shape financial habits and money dynamics within personal and professional partnerships. 

What does financial security look like for you? What keeps you up at night about money? 

To learn more about the Gebhardt Group, visit: https://gebhardtgroupinc.com/

Chapter Summaries
(00:00) Gratitude for Trips and Visits
Gratitude, family, and personal growth are discussed as we share our recent experiences and journeys, including a trip to Ireland and revisiting a ferry after 30 years.

(11:31) Exploring Autonomous Vehicles and Gratitude
Tesla ownership offers economic benefits, minimal maintenance, tax incentives, and potential for autonomous driving, with reflections on gratitude and staying present.

(22:49) Financial Security
Jim and Beth's differing views on financial security as business owners and how it evolves over time.

(36:45) Uncovering Money Histories for Financial Security
Financial security for business owners requires understanding personal relationships with money, influenced by childhood experiences and impacting couples' spending and decision-making.

(46:42) Financial Security Concerns
Understanding financial fears and obstacles can lead to effective solutions for achieving financial security and peace of mind.

Learn more about The Whole Wealth Journey and get periodic updates or helpful content by getting on our email list HERE. Entrepreneurs, exit strategies and personal financial planning before the sale are topics you can count on every episode.  You can follow us on Instagram @thewholewealthjourney. 

Transcript

Jim Gebhardt: [00:00:00] What was money like for you as a kid? Ooh. What was the earliest memory you have about money? Right. And when we ask that question of clients, typically, again, married couples, it is breathtaking to hear the differences.

Welcome to the whole wealth journey. Wealth with a 

Matthew Grishman: Y. 

Jim Gebhardt: What does that mean? What does that mean? Are we spelling it funny? 

Matthew Grishman: Uh, no, I think it's spelled, spelled. We're using the 

Jim Gebhardt: word Y the 

Matthew Grishman: the word Y, right? Okay, good. Not the letter Y, the actual word Y. 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, I know why. Why? Because we want to help people get on their path.

Then the path is all about their why, 

Matthew Grishman: and it's about aligning your finances with the people, the experience and the passions that give their 

Jim Gebhardt: lives. True meaning it's getting way beyond the bank statements, the brokerage statements, the trust documents, the life insurance. And taking a deeper dive [00:01:00] into your why.

Matthew Grishman: Well, admittedly, we're not for everyone. This is different. We're for the bold ones who really want to dive deeper and seek a life that resonates with who they really are at their core. Who finds value in vulnerability? 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, 

Matthew Grishman: you and I do. 

Jim Gebhardt: You and I do, and that's where we wanna play. But not everybody is comfortable with that vulnerability.

Matthew Grishman: Maybe we should introduce ourselves. What do you think? Oh, that's a good idea. Jim Gebhart. And I'm Matthew Grishman. We are the co-creators of the podcast, the whole wealth Journey. Ready to find your why. Then let's get started and get you one step closer to unlocking your inner wealth and wellbeing. 

Jim Gebhardt: So what are you grateful for today?

I. 

Matthew Grishman: I'm grateful for getting my voice back a little bit. You kind of hear this little, uh, mess, this little train wreck in my throat. It's 

Jim Gebhardt: not, it's not quite the Barry White I was hoping for. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. Well, hey baby. I can, I can do that. Hey baby, I can, I can really get into my, my baritone here today if we, if we need me to.

Gotcha. [00:02:00] Yes. But I'm, I'm grateful to be able to talk a little bit today. Yesterday, I wasn't so sure we were gonna be making it into studio today. So I'm grateful to be here. I'm also really grateful. We just spent about 10 days back on the east coast, first time on the East Coast, and almost a year and a half since my little, uh, adventure in cardiology began in April of 23.

My last visit to the East Coast prior to this trip was for opening day at Yankee Stadium when the Giants played right. The Yankees in New York. Right. April 1st of 23. So was awesome. And just for clarification purposes was awesome. Yeah. This was a trip. This was, yes. This was no, well, it was a trip. But it was really more of a visit.

Visit, right? Yes. Right. So just 

Jim Gebhardt: to clarify for our tribe is we see adventures like this in three different ways. There's a visit Yes. Which generally is to family. Yes. Seeing people, but more specifically family. Yeah, 

Matthew Grishman: yeah, yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: A trip, which is probably a blend [00:03:00] of some family and maybe a side or two. Well, that's a little, did a little bit of relaxation.

But you're going, you just did a trip. You just, I just did. I just, Barcelona. That was a trip. I'll, I'll, I'll come back to that. Absolutely. And then there's the vacation. Ah, and the vacation. Now it's different for everybody, right? I mean, it's 

Matthew Grishman: horizontal for me 

Jim Gebhardt: it's horizontal by a body of water. Yes. Or a pretty mountain Me.

It's more of a beach and a body of water. But it's, it's much more of a do nothing. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: Now I know tribe members that are listening that they can't do that. Oh, they can't sit and 

Matthew Grishman: do that for a week. Yeah. Being right. A human being, even though that's what we are, is often tough to be. We're really human doings.

A hundred percent. Right. And, and to spend a week, a full week or, or better yet, two weeks playing the role of a human being on vacation. Oh baby. Oh yeah, yeah, 

Jim Gebhardt: yeah. So you [00:04:00] had a kind of a combination of a visit with a little trip. With 

Matthew Grishman: a little trip. And grateful to see my people and spend time with them.

My mom, my dad, my brother, my sister-in-law, my Amy's entire family we got to spend time with. It was wonderful. I also have a little bit of gratitude because we braved the Long Island sound from New London, Connecticut to Orient Point New York for the first time in almost 30 years. Mm. Amy and I took to do it on like a Friday afternoon.

We did it on a. Thursday morning. Oh, okay. On my son, on miles' 24th birthday, when Amy and I were, oh gosh, kids 23 years old, we had a car. Our first car was stolen in Forest Hills, Queens, and her sister Donna was kind enough to give us her 1982 Mazda B 2000 pickup truck. We put it on the back of the ferry to bring it home and hit this winter storm, this [00:05:00] nor'easter that put 20 foot seas in the Long Island sound.

It almost dumped our truck off the back of the ferry. Amy and I swore we will never, ever take this ferry ever again. Well. Never is a long time. It is. And after 30 years of doing the commute between our families up and down 95 through Connecticut, suffering for hours and hours and hours in traffic, we finally said, we're gonna try the boat again.

Mm. And it was lovely. Oh, nice. Such a, that was the only part that was vacation because we actually just the ferry, we sat on the boat and just enjoyed the cruise. Yeah. It was lovely. Very nice. Very lovely. How about you brother? 

Jim Gebhardt: What's your gratitude? Uh, I could spend the whole show, I had the trip of a lifetime in July.

A little serendipitous that in June I was reading an email from our golf club on last call for the trip to Ireland. I was like, what trip? What trip? To what trip To Ireland. And so I open it up and I [00:06:00] start reading it and it's, you know, click here for the itinerary. Sure. And I'm having this little thought, 'cause I've got a very specific list of courses that I would like to play in Southern Ireland.

And I'm like, there's no way there's, it's just not gonna be the holy smokes. It's the entire list, all six sitting there on a platter. Just gotta say yes. Yeah. And it's an incredibly self-indulgent thing for me to go trotting off for eight days and spend the money, or as we like to say, invest the money.

Yeah. In a trip like that. And God bless Beth, she was like, you gotta go. Yeah. You, uh, you gotta go. You. I mean, how do you know if or when you're ever gonna be able to do that trip, let alone get enough of your people together to commit to a big trip like that and organize it and everything else heard?

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. I mean, you, you te so you teed this up that you were our last episode. You were going on the trip. I know. Yes. And now you're back. I'm back. And it was 

Jim Gebhardt: everything. [00:07:00] How was investment? What was the r How was the ROI 1000000000%. Wow. Everything about it. I met. That's a lot Zeroes. I new people, great new friends.

Yeah. Took some friendships that I had and, and kind of made 'em deeper and more meaningful. The six courses were everything. And then some like just dream come true stuff for a, a freaky golfer like me. And one of the things I'm most excited about is all the fitness, all the emphasis on, you know, health and strength and all this good stuff that I've been on since November.

Uh, ho ho I'm really glad I did it. Yeah, because it was about 50 miles of walking in the sand dunes and that took a bit. Yeah. But as I may have said on the show before, I think the Irish are some of the most friendly, kind, sweet people that are on earth. And we could stand a big dose of them wherever we go.

But I mean, the little towns that we were hanging out in, along Southern Ireland and kinda, we made our way up the, uh, the west coast and you know, that as that was wrapping up, [00:08:00] then it came to the realization, it's like, no wait, I'm, I'm actually, I'm actually going on to Barcelona. 

Matthew Grishman: Right. 

Jim Gebhardt: To hang visit out with Grace.

Right. Your trip's going to a visit. My, my trip is going to a visit to visit our daughter, grace, who was, who was doing an internship in Barcelona and our son Jack. We gave him a, uh, an airline ticket for his 18th birthday to go spend some time with his sister in advance. Am I getting there? It, it wasn't intentional on my part, but I was so focused and fixated on the golf trip that I did next to, nothing relative to, other than, you know, booking an apartment.

Grace and Jack did the itinerary. Nice. So there was definitely vacation components to it. Not necessarily lounge chair on the beach. But in terms of all the planning and all of the scheduling, the logistics and the, it was just a, 

Matthew Grishman: it was a show up for you. I just, 

Jim Gebhardt: I just kind of showed up. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: And Barcelona put it on the list.

If you haven't been. It is utterly, utterly, utterly magical. It is on the list, the vibrancy of, of [00:09:00] that town and the people. And I mean, at, at 11, 12 o'clock at night down these, you know, what we would consider to be these big boulevards, they call 'em plazas. There's not hundreds of people out, there are thousands of people out.

Wow. Walking around. Street vendors, cafes are open. I mean, just rooftops are a big thing there. So we went to a few rooftop bar restaurants and you're looking out over the city or you're looking at the grata. Familia or, I mean, it is, it is just an absolutely magical place. And the other thing that as an American that was pretty shocking is it's also not expensive.

Huh? Relative to here, relative to Northern California. So lodging, transportation, public transit was awesome. Restaurants, I mean, uh, cappuccino was like two Euro. Wow. We had some beautiful meals that were at least half the price of what they would be here, if not more. Wow. And then to just see Jack Blossom with his independence and traveling independently to get there and kind [00:10:00] of being the, the leader of the pack because Grace had her internship during the day, and so she was a, a little bit committed, which is understandable, but it was just so much fun to spend time with Jack one-on-one like that.

And then just to see Grace blossoming in her own way, having now done some, you know, solo travel on her own. It's just a wonderful growth edge. So 

Matthew Grishman: that's, that's awesome. 

Jim Gebhardt: The other thing I have to share in the way of gratitude is I have seen the future. 

Matthew Grishman: Oh, 

Jim Gebhardt: you have? And. It's got me just like my head is spinning.

So in the last week, 10 days, we have bought a Tesla. Right. 

Matthew Grishman: The probably the biggest shock you have dropped on my lap in, in a minute or two. 

Jim Gebhardt: Well, 

Matthew Grishman: I was, I was quite surprised when you delivered that news to me on Monday. How so? It just wasn't something I expected. Okay, good. I'd like to keep you on your toes.

Yeah. I just didn't, I didn't expect it. I expected you to 

Jim Gebhardt: always have something that grumbled, oh, well we will have a grumbler. And when you start to look at the economics of [00:11:00] the electric vehicle, in particular, the, the Tesla relative to our, our solar plan, right? Our, our solar panels. It becomes an unbelievably economical decision.

But that's not, that's not where I've seen the future. The last two days, I have used the temporarily free autopilot feature, temporarily free. So I think for the first 30 or 60 days of owning the vehicle. They give you the software to be able to use the autopilot, the self-driving autonomous capability.

Matthew Grishman: Okay. Of course, it's a subscription 

Jim Gebhardt: and I've done it twice. 

Matthew Grishman: Oh. 

Jim Gebhardt: And most recently last night with both the boys in the car. Okay. Because I did it the night before with Grant in the car and it is unbelievable. It is freaky crazy wild mind-boggling to be in a vehicle in commuter traffic. Stop and go periods where you accelerate.

Sometime you're on the freeway, sometime you're on surface streets. It navigates stop signs. [00:12:00] It makes 90 degree turns. How relaxing of an experience was that for you? It's getting more relaxing. We were Defcon five the first time I did it. I was gonna say, where I literally had my hands next to the wheel, my foot hovering over the pedals to either go gas or break depending on what was needed.

Right. And I started to relax a lot more yesterday. Yeah. It does prompt you to put your hands on the wheel periodically and give a very slight little, just, it's, it's, it's your acknowledge, you know, your acknowledgement to the computer that Sure. You're still there. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: Wild. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, I will throw out a shout, a shout out, uh, blast from the past to our old friend John Driebe and, uh, say thank you.

You might remember we had him in studio. Yes. About 

Jim Gebhardt: 14 years 

Matthew Grishman: ago. Yeah. It feels like it. I think he was here in 20 COVID times 21. Maybe like around Valentine's Day 21. We brought him in because we, you know, we just, it was car season and you and I were getting lots of questions from clients on, you know, do I buy, do I lease [00:13:00] leases?

Do I get into the electric thing yet? And he was kind enough to tell us it was probably about three years away. You know, give it, give it like three more years. Let more I. Come to market. And I think part of what you explained to me on Monday about your decision to jump into the world of Mr. Musk's automobiles was that when you look at the price point on these things now, it's almost irresponsible financially to not consider the Tesla as an option based on the price point.

Price point at 

Jim Gebhardt: That's exactly where we got to. I thought they were more expensive. Yeah. And certainly you can spend more, 

Matthew Grishman: and that was John's prediction in our studio three years ago. Give it three years. Prices will come down. Technology will be easier to use. 

Jim Gebhardt: The, the other thing I will say is it was the most millennial transaction I've ever experienced.

There you go. There was so little human interaction. Yeah. That the, the whole transaction was done on the app. Of course it was. In terms of ordering the vehicle, going through this, you know, kind of the [00:14:00] validation process. We leased it because it was so economical. You get the $7,500. Incentive, you know, tax credit off of that.

They just take that right off the price and then it drops into the lease. And now you start to go, okay, well there's gonna be next to no maintenance on this car for three years, other than a tire change. I mean, there's no oil, there's no oil filter, there's no transmission, there's no fluids, there's no, and you start to go, and we have enough solar in our program to charge this thing.

We have a battery. Yeah. Economically, it starts to, you know, it starts to make a heck of a lot of sense. Nice work. And, but I've seen the future because the autonomous drives, the autonomous thing is, is very real. And I think it's, I think it's gonna be here a lot sooner than we think in terms of, you know, the, the majority.

I think we will get to that a lot faster. 

Matthew Grishman: Come on, put the stake in the sand. Make the prediction. You made it with me four years. Well, you made it with me. What, what are our children of the last generation? Oh yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: Cute little story. We have a, an old Jeep Wrangler. [00:15:00] Sure. 2011 Jeep Wrangler and that we parked that on the street.

We don't have a big enough driveway for the fleet of cars that we're dealing with right now with four kids. And where are you gonna put this helicopter? Right? This, this young couple is walking by with their three-year-old and I can hear 'em from a hundred yards away. And I'm in the Jeep and the mom goes, oh, there's the man that owns the orange Jeep's.

Go say hi. So they come over and I'm like, Hey buddy, you wanna get in the Jeep? He's like, no, no, no. And I said, well, you know, to the mom. I said, someday he'll be probably driving something like this. And, and she was very quick with her reply. She's like, I doubt my son will ever learn how to drive. Whoa. A 3-year-old kid that's 12 years away, 12, 15, you know, 14, 13, 14 years away from, from a permit and a driver's license.

And she's like, I don't think he's gonna learn how to drive. Because at that point, the autonomy, you know, the, the nature, you're gonna learn how to push buttons. You're not even gonna be pushing buttons. That was the other thing with you're just programming the computer. That was the other [00:16:00] thing, grant, the other day I was trying to find something on the, on, on the screen.

He's like, dad, why are you, why are you pressing the buttons on the screen? Just hit the button on the, on the steering wheel and speak. What do you want it to do? I was like, oh, well, oh, okay. Uh, b that sounds like a good idea to me. So anyway, like I said, I could go on and on and on about gratitude. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, I appreciate that.

That's, that's a fun conversation. I love kind of thinking about where things are going. I wonder is, is the future going to be completely autonomous in cars or are we gonna kind of keep this quasi, hey, for the big halls yeah, we're gonna push the autonomous button on the car, but at times we're gonna need to hand fly this thing.

Right. It, it's kind of almost how I think you and I talk about, I think in certain 

Jim Gebhardt: weather conditions, you, you would probably would want hands on it. Yeah. But in stop and go, stop and go traffic and Sure. A long haul, like, you know, not, this wasn't a long haul, but when I come up here, it's about an hour and a half.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: I did not do [00:17:00] that. I did not use it today. I don't know why. Huh. It's probably 'cause it's not front of mind for me. Yeah. I couldn't figure out how to set the cruise control. That was funny. I mean, I even, I even talked to the computer. You just talk to it. I did. I said, Hey, the cruise control function's not available.

Right. So I, you know, ah, I'll, I'll figure that one out. But anyway, I do think it's going to, I mean, I, I thought about it a lot for my parents as they were aging. How nice it would've been for them to just be able to. Go sit in a vehicle and speak to, you know, please take me to the nearest Dunking Donuts.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, 

Jim Gebhardt: that'd be great. And the door would close and off they would go and they'd have a lovely time and they could re, you know, either take that vehicle or request another one from Uber or whoever. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, 

Jim Gebhardt: it's coming. It's absolutely coming. So that's a 

Matthew Grishman: wrap. Nice. It's well done. Well, you know, this show just is one big riff on gratitude, isn't it?

It really is. At the end of the day, it's, I mean, that's the, that's the center of it. That's one of the things I'm so grateful for. What we do around here is, is we get to sit in here and [00:18:00] allow on the outside a reflection of, of our core values on the inside. And, and gratitude is a biggie, a, a centerpiece in that it's, it's just such a, a, like a grounding exercise.

Such a get present mm-hmm. Exercise. It, it, it's amazing how much time I still, even on this journey that I've been on with you for years, how much time I can still catch myself in the past, in the future. Outside of what's going on right now. It doesn't happen as much as it used to. I'm, I'm getting really good at anchoring to the present moment.

Gratitude, expressing gratitude, sharing what I'm grateful for or what I'm looking forward to there. There's a, a, a gratitude essence. Mm-hmm. When you and I talk about things that we're looking forward to on the calendar, a hundred percent. Mm-hmm. There's just something about that, that kind of flushes the decks and replaces any kind of pilus I'm feeling about what might have happened yesterday or any kind of pilus I [00:19:00] might have over, uh, the uncertainty of, you know, two or three hours from now.

Right. It's incredible how it gets us focused and present. 

Jim Gebhardt: It's 

Matthew Grishman: my anchor 

Jim Gebhardt: when I Yeah. Somehow get away from it or I forget about it, or, it's so easy to see how the scarcity and the negativity and the doubt. And the worry and everybody, all my old friends Yep. They come showing up. 

Matthew Grishman: Yep. Well, unin uninvited.

Yep. But they show up. Oh, your friends. Now I get where you're going. Your friends like 

Jim Gebhardt: scarcity, 

Matthew Grishman: worry, worry. 

Jim Gebhardt: Fear, anxiety, fear, negativity, anger. Yeah. All those guys. Yeah, all those, I mean, they hang out together. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. Well they're a big gang that has been created to protect you, to keep you safe. Sure. Right?

Sure. At least that's what they 

Jim Gebhardt: think their job is. Sure. Now that I no longer live in a cave and wild, you know, wild. I have to fight the saber piece. Tiger Wild aren't coming to eat me every 

Matthew Grishman: day. Right. We can evolve. Well look, yeah, you could kind of put that stuff aside and use what we call the pause button.

That's a much better way to do it. I love our [00:20:00] tool of gratitude. It it, it's kind of how we start our whole process and it's really a great way to kind of kick off how we're going to lay out the entire curriculum of the whole wealth journey. It really starts with gratitude and the reason why you and I, I think, are being very deliberate and taking the time to express gratitude to one another.

Is to show by example to the tribe today, how we start the whole wealth journey every time we get together and get in it. Yep. Right. And, and you know, here we are at the very beginning of the whole wealth journey where we're just gonna get started on the right path, unpacking somebody's story. Mm-hmm. And, and, you know, we'll, we'll model that with each other today and how we do that.

Mm-hmm. But it always starts with gratitude for the purpose of getting incredibly present in the moment. The biggest benefit to the whole wealth journey and being a participant in the journey is being present. To the journey. [00:21:00] If your head is worried about what happened yesterday, or you and I get too caught up in what the future could hold for us.

Right. I, I look at our relationship, you and me, and I think about the times that you and I have had, had struggle in our relationship and it's quite often we get hung up on the past or we get consumed with what tomorrow might look like. And the solution, you and I have always had to flush the decks and get back to the essence of you loving me and me loving you is gratitude.

Jim Gebhardt: Well, 

Matthew Grishman: why is that? 

Jim Gebhardt: Why is that? How does that happen? It's the biochemical cascade that happens. Sure. When you drop into the gratitude. Yes, absolutely. Right. It's literally a chemical chain reaction in the body. Yes. That flushes the decks. And part of the reason we've always used that with clients when they come in or zoom, we don't know what their day's been like.

Right. We don't, we have no idea. I had a Zoom with a client last week where. Eh, I could tell he was a little [00:22:00] edgy. Yeah. A little me, 

Matthew Grishman: not himself. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. And it was just like, what's on the gratitude list? He, he struggled. Sure. He struggled. Sure. His wife did it effortlessly and he kind of just kind of went along with that, you don't have to do this.

Like, there's no perfect way to do this. No. And you could most certainly fake it sometimes too. It, our team calls, we've had a number of team calls somewhere in the four or 5,000 where, you know, a a a team member or two might, might be struggling a little bit with finding something that they're grateful for.

Matthew Grishman: Yes. 

Jim Gebhardt: And sometimes it's just so obvious. It's like, I'm alive. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: I can see. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: I've seen some reels on Instagram lately of, it's been two women. They're paraplegic, they're in wheelchairs, and yet the exercise routines they do are, are just like, you're what? You're, you're what? So I've sent it to the family as kind of a, you know, let's not just take everything for granted that we can, you know, walk and walk.

Yeah. [00:23:00] Right. I mean, keep it that simple if you're stuck, right? Absolutely. And if you can't walk, maybe you can see 

Matthew Grishman: Exactly. 

Jim Gebhardt: And if you can't see 

Matthew Grishman: and walk, maybe you 

Jim Gebhardt: can smell 

Matthew Grishman: or hear, right? I mean, or maybe you're just alive experiencing life today. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: Right. Somehow, whatever that is. What's that one thing?

Because where this becomes so critically important is the very first question that you and I get to sit down and discuss with a prospective client, a friend each other when we talk about unpacking your story and what are you grateful for? We have to get hyper present because the next question that comes outta your mouth or my mouth is, what does financial security look like to you?

Mm-hmm. When we start the whole wealth journey. We can't start something if we don't know where we are. Right? I mean, where are we going? What are we trying to accomplish financially, relationally, experientially, professionally, [00:24:00] in life? Uh, I think sometimes people have an easier time knowing where they're going than knowing where they are.

Sure. And yet, we really can't get where we're going if we don't know where we are. So you and I have designed the whole wealth journey to create this starting point where we meet people exactly where they are, and we start the conversation with just understanding a little bit about what financial security means to you.

What does it look like in your life? Mm-hmm. Do you have it? Do you not have it? Mm-hmm. What does financial security look like to you? What does that mean to you? Jim Gebhart, what does financial security look like? That has evolved quite a bit. Hot Dan Cast from Beth and I over the years. Sure. Has it been the same for the two of you or is it generally different?

Jim Gebhardt: Uh, it's generally different in concept. Okay. 

Matthew Grishman: Tell me more. 

Jim Gebhardt: I've been betting on myself since I was 26 years old. Sure. So I [00:25:00] don't really, I've never really worried about, you know, the job market or my boss or the company or the culture of the company or any of these things because I've been betting on myself for all these years.

Okay. So, financial security to me was, can I continue to perform and do my job? Okay. So it was about, it wasn't necessarily how many dollars I had in the bank. It was about your ability to go make it. It was about my ability to keep making it. Okay. And our dear friend Glen, would, you know, kind of. Get in my ear every once in a while.

He's like, you're like that old Doritos commercial, you know, don't worry, we'll make more. Right. I was always a top line focused guy. Right. Not so much focused on bottom line and scrimping and saving every last dollar or two, but just the belief in that I know I could make more. Right. You were a goes ins guy, not a goes out sky.

Totally. Yeah. Beth is a little bit different in the sense that the, the financial security from her, for her has been having more cash in the bank. So now [00:26:00] we keep a level of cash in the bank. God bless through the success of the business, it's fine for me, but it really gives her peace of mind and as a result of that, that security makes me feel good for her.

Right. Like, you know Sure. If that, if that really gives her peace. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. Fabulous. Well, of course there's gonna be a little bit of an interdependency there, right? Yeah, totally. If she is feeling financially secure, that. Helps me a little bit feel financially secure. I get that. What, what do you think that is?

Because your, your understanding of financial security, what it means to you is very much more conceptual, whereas it sounds like Beth's is much more, what's the word I'm looking for? Tactic? T Tactile. Yeah. Yeah. Where, where it's almost like, you know, if she can touch the gold mm-hmm. And it's liquid gold.

Mm-hmm. Not illiquid gold. Yeah. Then there's a, a, a certain piece that comes with that. 

Jim Gebhardt: So as business owners, you know, we own an S corp and we file quarterly estimated taxes. [00:27:00] Oh. It's my favorite quarterly thing to do. So when those quarterly estimated tax payments get flown through Ghar group into our personal bank account.

Right. Or our checking account. Right. I, I try to have some fun with Beth on this. It's not, and the reason I say try. Is, I also, I don't want to try to belittle the fact that, you know, she gets a lot of security from seeing the money in the bank account. Right. But I do have to burst the bubble when she sees these rather sizable deposits come in.

Like, hun, that's there for like a day. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah, yeah. Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: So I mean, if you need to stare at it for 24 hours or take a couple screenshots, enjoy it. Yes. 'cause it's going in and it's going out. Yes. Right. It's going to Uncle Sam, it's going to uncle what's our governor's name? I don't know. Yeah. Whoever he is.

Yeah. And yet that starts to become a little bit of a goal because I know how much peace it gives her. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: Right. And it, it, it is definitely more, I mean, she's, she is definitely more boots on the ground paying the [00:28:00] bills, you know, the, the, the tactical moves in the army on the front lines and paying this bill and that bill and there, there wasn't always times where there was money left at the end of the month to pay all the bills.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: And that created a tremendous amount of stress and a tremendous amount of PTSD that. You know, I owe her lots of amends on that 'cause it's, it's been my fault wanting to start a business. Sure. I am, I am much more, like I said earlier, I'm much more the top line guy. I'm much more the net worth statement guy.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. Where I 

Jim Gebhardt: can look at the assets, I can look at the liabilities, I can look at the growth of the business that's provides recurring revenue to all of us in the business. Sure. And I get, I get a lot of peace from that. 

Matthew Grishman: Yep. It's amazing how we talk to so many people and the definition of financial security and what it looks like in your life is just different for people.

Oh, it's very different. It's, we could, we could tell the stories for weeks and it changes. Yes it does. Right. It it, there were times for me when financial security was about the balance sheet and the big [00:29:00] picture and look how much money I've got in the retirement accounts. Then there were times when, you know, back in the spend thrift days.

For me, it was all about that big future. Right. When I didn't quite have the healthiest relationship with money. It was knowing that, okay, we've got, we've got some tomorrow money put away and I've got this great job and this great career that brings me tons of cash flow and it feels like all I've gotta do is show up and mm-hmm.

And I make money do it. Right. Right. And then when that whole house of cards came crumbling down and I kind of rolled over into the world of being a little more miserly with my money, it was all about having money in the checking account. It was all about having a safety net, a safety net, knowing that I had a couple of months worth of cash mm-hmm.

In the bank. Mm-hmm. Where, where that's changed for me and where it's expanded a little bit and what feels like my source of financial security now is seeing stability in my money barrels in the different kind of [00:30:00] barrels that I've allocated my financial resources to, the money that I have available to me now when I think about.

What Amy and I would like to do with our lives over the next couple of years and, and the money that, the financial resources available to that. Feeling good about that, right? We'd love to buy a travel trailer again. A travel trailer. A travel trailer. We haven't said those words on the show in a while, right?

We gotta bring it back in case listen. Which is different than an rv. It is, it is. A travel trailer is something you attach to the back of your truck and tow it with you. You hook and go. You hook and go. Absolutely. We're, you know, we're looking to do that. We're looking to spend some time exploring the, the middle part of our country and, uh, and then when I think, you know, down the road later and potentially even never, uh, we we're starting to develop some nice financial security in those barrels as well.

The biggest piece of financial security for me, I've gotten from hanging out with you and it's this belief in myself. It's this, [00:31:00] I know that if I show up as me very clear on what my unique ability is. Because of the time, energy, and financial resources, you and I have given ourselves permission to invest within ourselves to make ourselves the very best version of ourselves that we can become.

I have found my greatest source of financial security is believing in me. Right. 

Jim Gebhardt: Which is also part of the reason you're on such a health kick. Oh, absolutely. Right. Because if, if you are the franchise 

Matthew Grishman: Yes. 

Jim Gebhardt: Right. And there's a lot of people in our tribe listening right now that they are the franchise. Yes.

Then you've gotta continue to make that investment in yourself. Yes. Right. If, if that's, if that's the single greatest risk. Right. We talk about this a lot with clients in terms of looking at, looking at their universe and what is the single greatest threat to their money. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: So in a case like this, where it's you and you know, it's, it's you and [00:32:00] me and our ability to show up and keep doing it.

Yeah. Then we have to put ourselves in the very best possible condition to be able to do it. Yes. Yes. And that's a separate conversation, I realize. But I think it's, I think it's powerful if you're in a relationship to be able to sit and talk with your partner about what gives you financial security.

Matthew Grishman: Absolutely. In fact, I would suggest, let's, let's invite the tribe to pause. If you haven't grabbed any kind of writing utensil instrument journal, your, your iPad, whatever it is you like to write down, this is what we would do if you were sitting a hundred percent in the office with us on day one. Yeah. I mean, we're, we're here in a podcast studio doing identically what we would do if you were in a conference room in our Lafayette, Roseville office.

Right. Which is starting this conversation, unpacking your story. Mm-hmm. Getting an idea of what financial security looks like to you. And we would be leading the conversation mm-hmm. By sharing examples within our own families, our clients, our [00:33:00] friends, people who've given us permission to talk. So let's take a minute and make this interactive and spend a minute.

What gives you financial security? What does that look like to you? Just 

Jim Gebhardt: what does it look like in your life? And just, and just let it go. So, I mean, if, if it's a writing exercise, just write, 

Matthew Grishman: yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: Think less, feel more. Drop into your heart. Don't get all heady. Don't get up in your head with, well, you know what my father told me.

I mean, just ha ba ba ba stop. Get outta your head and drop into your heart with what feels right. What feels right. What is it? Is it cash in the bank? Is it no debt? Is it guaranteed lifetime income? Is it, you know, what is it? And 

Matthew Grishman: just, is it keeping myself healthy so I can continue to show up every day?

Jim Gebhardt: Exactly. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. And 

Jim Gebhardt: just let it flow on what comes up. And you, you know, [00:34:00] you're not gonna capture it all in, in this instance, so keep this little notebook around because stuff's gonna bobble. 

Matthew Grishman: That's important. Stuff's gonna bubble up. Dude, you just said something very, very important. We gotta slow that down.

You are not supposed to know the answer completely right now. Mm-hmm. This is, this is something that more will be revealed. Mm-hmm. Because if you've never sat down and gone through the exercise of making it real, and what I mean by making it real is getting it outta your head as a random thought. Mm-hmm.

That comes in and out. Mm-hmm. 

Jim Gebhardt: And onto, 

Matthew Grishman: onto paper. And actually onto paper. Mm-hmm. Like bring it to life. Bring your vision, your dream of what financial security looks like to life by getting it outta your head, outta your body, onto paper. And then you gotta share it with someone. Mm-hmm. If you have a partner in life who might also have a definition of financial security, what a great conversation starter.

Hey, I was listening to this podcast. These two knucklehead [00:35:00] financial guys are trying to get me to think about things and get it on paper. And I decided to do this little writing exercise on what financial security looked like to me. And you know, I was curious what that looked like to you. And for a 

Jim Gebhardt: lot of business owners that have been blowing and going and.

You know, got a hunch bet a bunch on a business and a new direction and a new opportunity and a new new, new, new, new, new. A lot of times that partner, that spouse is just kind of riddled with the side effects of all that risk. Yes. And they covet, yes, I use that word very intentionally. They covet financial security.

Yes. They covet whatever lots of cash is to you, the listener. They covet that in cash. There's a lot of powerful conversations that happen in our conference rooms, but one of, one of the ones that really kind of makes me smile is when we ask a client that question and 'cause we, we bring it back up when we get to the money barrels conversation, which we won't get into that today [00:36:00] in context of the now barrel and the money that's just gonna set aside for today when I ask that question to clients.

So, you know, Martha, what would be a, I mean, like just a dreamy amount of cash to just have on hands at all times? Well, I've never actually, I've never thought about that. I mean, you know, there are times when we have cash, but we don't, you know, there's not, there's always some new business thing or new investment or, I, I don't, I, you know, there's stock, they can't answer the question.

Sure. Right. Like, okay, you don't have to answer it today. And then the next meeting, or they follow up with an email or something and, and, and they, they give a number that kind of often knocks my socks off. 

Matthew Grishman: Sure. Well some, because again, this is where more will be revealed. Sometimes an entrepreneur doesn't know that having two or 300 grand city in cash at all times could give them the sense of financial security that they've never had.

Right. And this is something with a partner that you and I have experienced firsthand and we've seen firsthand in the [00:37:00] office, which is your partner who's watching the melee of the entrepreneur that craves financial security. Is gonna be so much more in alignment with you if they know you value financial security.

Jim Gebhardt: Yes. 

Matthew Grishman: Right. And and again, you and I had to learn that through the school of hard knocks. Yes. Of blowing and going. And as much as you and I have valued financial security, I'm not sure, you and I always did a great job of communicating what that looked like to Amy and to Beth. Uh, no, I've done a terrible job of that.

Right. 

Jim Gebhardt: Ditto. And I think what is, 'cause I would present the balance sheet. Sure. Right. I would present the net worth statement. And look how great we are. Yeah. Just try to try to demonstrate that we're fine financially. Right. And she would show me that there's $8 and 72 cents in the in the check and be like, but we're fine over here.

Yeah. And she's like, Uhhuh, but the goes outs are cuckoo. Right. How do I buy milk today? Right. Absolutely. And a lot of [00:38:00] that goes back to R oh eight Mess. Yes. Right. R oh eight near disaster. Which still was one of the greatest things that's ever happened to me. And happened for you maybe? Oh, it absolutely happened for me.

A point in the long run way at a point in the short run. It definitely happened to me. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, it didn't because you said you were laying in bed asking God to take you every night, but Yes. And he didn't, so nothing happened to you. True. Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: Well said. 

Matthew Grishman: Thank you. 

Jim Gebhardt: So it's a powerful question. Yeah. Yeah. The concept of financial security and we live in a day and an age where.

You know, pensions are realistically a thing of the past unless you're a public servant. And there are, there are tools and strategies that we use with clients all the time that we can manufacture that kind of a, of a private pension. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: But the onus is on you. Right. And if you own the, if you're a business owner, the onus is on you to deliver and to get, you know, to create it, to create the cash, the investments, the liquidity.

The cashflow, what the assets, whatever you wanna call it, that are gonna get you to the promised land 

Matthew Grishman: that are gonna give you and [00:39:00] your partner and the people who depend upon you. This sense of financial security. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yes. 

Matthew Grishman: What, what we're really doing here in kicking off the whole wealth journey is, is going through what?

Kind of step one is all about. Mm-hmm. And, and in a traditional financial planning sense, what, what the tribe might be familiar with, if you've ever gone through any version of, of financial planning, is in the beginning there's always this kind of discovery process, right. This, this get to know, you get to know each other.

And where you and I have found our industry has missed an incredible opportunity is they've made discovery predominantly a financial conversation. Oh, yeah. And, and you and I start there, right? Question number one is understanding the definition of financial security. Yeah. And whether or not you've successfully communicated that to your partner.

If you have a partner in life, there's a lot more to the human side, the human centered approach that you and I take to wealth management that comes out in a question [00:40:00] like. What does financial security look like to you? I feel that that tells me a lot about you as a human, you as a person. 

Jim Gebhardt: I think it is an opportunity to continue the curiosity around it.

Yeah. In the context of what we could consider an extra credit opportunity for our tribe today. Oh, tell me more. Uh, which is, what was money like for you as a kid? Ooh. What was the earliest memory you have about money? Right. And when we ask that question of clients, typically, again, married couples, it is breathtaking to hear the differences.

I'm thinking of a couple right now who, you know, husband's passed away. He worked for a very large oil company. The wife, she was the youngest, is the youngest of five. And everything she's ever owned in her entire childhood was a hand-me-down. Most of the clothes were made by her mother because they couldn't afford to buy clothes, and so they trickled down through the siblings.

Until it got to Donna. Right. [00:41:00] And so I was 

Matthew Grishman: wondering what we were gonna call her today. 

Jim Gebhardt: And in Donna's case, she has had, and she still does, has a challenging relationship with money from a scarcity fear. I can't spend it, it's not so much I can't spend it, but just there's, there's a, there's a lot of money baggages that has come as a result.

And when we asked that question of she and her husband and her husband didn't come from a wealthy family or an affluent family, but there was always enough. Right. Money wasn't an issue. Right, right. And I remember Donna telling us stories about, you know, when dinner was served, there was a little bit of a fight at the table on, you know, who got to the table first.

'cause there was a limited amount of food they had, they ate. But you know, just a very different, you know, from on the other side of it being a very comfortable, you know, they went on nice family trips and they had a new car every once in a while. And you know, there money wasn't a stressor. And it is vitally important for us to understand this.

Yeah. Vitally [00:42:00] important. Oh, sure. Because it forms so many of the habits. Like we, we, we tell lighthearted jokes about our super senior clients. Right. Our 95-year-old clients. And you're working with one right now while he's not 95. We know when he dies you gotta go through the house with a metal detector.

Yes. You gotta open up walls open. Oh, there's gonna be open up gold. You're gonna be looking for floorboards. There's gonna 

Matthew Grishman: be 

Jim Gebhardt: golden cash 

Matthew Grishman: buried all 

Jim Gebhardt: over that house. Everywhere. Yep. Everywhere. Yeah. And while we kind of joke about it, like it's from the movies or something, there's history to that. There's reasons.

One of our clients whose mom lived in Las Vegas the last few years of her life, and she was in her, I mean she was, she grew up during a depression. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: She's been gone for 15 years. And I suggested to the, to the daughter. I said, you need to go through every can. Every can in the, in the, uh, kitchen, every box, every shoebox, every purse, every pocket.

You gotta look for loose floorboards. Every Bible. She 

Matthew Grishman: found books. I 

Jim Gebhardt: have a client who STEs 

Matthew Grishman: cash Sure. In her bibles, 

Jim Gebhardt: found [00:43:00] over $10,000 in the house. Nice. In fives and tens and twenties. Oh, my favorite denominations squirreled away all over the place. Right? Yes. So this conversation and the question of non-sequential, I hope your, uh, right.

Yeah. Of your money history 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: Starts to give us clues as to perhaps some of the behaviors Sure. You're gonna share with us, and ultimately when we start to get into the, the kind of the money remodeling part of the conversation where you may have some hangup. I 

Matthew Grishman: can't stop thinking about, and what am I gonna call them?

Let's call them Todd and Eleanor. That's not their real names. I remember when Todd and Eleanor came into the office, they have a net worth north of $5 million. She was angry with him because he never wanted to travel. All he wanted to do was putter around the house and play with his motorcycle every time she would [00:44:00] go spend any money shopping at Target grocery store.

I seem to remember the grocery store. I seem to remember a Verizon bill, $110. Verizon Bill. She just r he ripped her a new one in my presence. Ri ripped her a new one. And what was amazing was that the first couple of times we got together with them watching how they would talk over each other, cut each other off, be very, very divisive when any adversarial, any, any kind of money.

Thing would come up. They would just disagree with each other. And, and finally, okay, stop, stop, stop, stop. And this was long before you and I had formally introduced this conversation of kind of getting started on the right path, understanding? Mm-hmm. Your background, financial security, how money was treated in your family growing up.

And I, and I stopped them and looked at both. I go, okay, stop, stop, stop. Please, guys. We're not getting anywhere. Todd, what was money like for you as a kid growing up? And then I asked Eleanor the same exact question. And [00:45:00] to watch these two, Todd in particular look at his wife and say, what do you mean? What was money like growing up as a kid, we didn't have any, I shared a bed with my three brothers.

I had to pin my pillow to my. Bedsheets. So I didn't lose it in the middle of the night, which I've only heard one other person ever describe something like that before. And that's my mother-in-law who had to do the same thing as a kid growing up with 13 children in a house and all fighting for the same attention from their parents and food, and to watch Eleanor's face.

As Todd was telling this story about growing up as a kid fighting for space in bed. It was almost like she had a new appreciation and understanding and a little bit of compassion for why he could be. Everything melted such a. A pain in the butt sometimes over how she spends money. All the money stressed between them.

It explained. It 

Jim Gebhardt: completely melted. 

Matthew Grishman: It did. And if I recall, 

Jim Gebhardt: didn't she say I'd never, I've never heard you talk. I mean, they've been married 

Matthew Grishman: 30 years. I've never, 30 years and I've never heard that story before. 

Jim Gebhardt: Right. [00:46:00] Hello? It's incredible. Hello. How 

Matthew Grishman: that 

Jim Gebhardt: talk about 

Matthew Grishman: vital could happen. Oh, absolutely.

Absolutely. I mean, I, I'd like to think that, you know, you and I are just a couple of financial planners who like to do things different. What I'm finding is it seems like we're more relationship counselors disguised as financial planners because a lot of times these questions we ask, it's not like you and I are doing anything, we're just, we're asking questions.

That's getting people to talk about things they've never shared with one another before. And by sharing some of these things with your partner, you learn so much more about each other and it answers so many of the questions about where we may be disagree on money. I. It's the number one reason why we don't charge by the hour.

Jim Gebhardt: Oh, there you go. That's pretty smart. If we charge by the hour, oh, we'd be so wealthy. Everybody. Everybody. Well, yeah, but everybody, I mean, I hate being on the clock. I hate, I hate working with any kind of a professional that's by the hour because it doesn't invite, encourage, or facilitate [00:47:00] conversation. No, it makes every conversation an economic decision.

I'm trying, it's an economic decision. I'm trying to do this as fast as humanly possible and get in and get out, you know? 'cause I know the clock's running. Right? I mean, we have different attorneys that we work with in our business that it's six minutes. Right. And generally it takes you and me 20 minutes to say hello.

Right? So, uh, that doesn't really work in the hourly model. It, it's not that we require the conversations, we just, we love it and we encourage it. Sure. Because where else in life do you get to sit down? For a block of time, we don't have TVs blaring with CNBC. Jim, what's his name isn't barking at you over some stock idea.

Right, right. We don't, there's not a lot of hubbub or chaos. It's a very quiet, your conference room? My conference room or quiet Tranquil pla Yeah, tranquil places where we are inviting the conversation. 

Matthew Grishman: Yes. When you think about this question we've asked, and then you think about the question that follows up from what does financial security look like?

What was money like [00:48:00] growing up as a kid? We have to have that kind of environment because the next question is where we really, really start to get closer to bone, right? We're, we're getting below the surface and we're getting, you know, really down to stuff that, that can tell us about who you are and where our work can begin together, and, and that is what keeps you up at night about money.

What do you worry about? With money. And if we start from a place of what financial security looks like, it allows us to really explore what these fears worries obstacles. Right. What, what is it that we, I mean this is really the triage, right? This is really the, when we identify what keeps us up at night about money, this is kind of where we start our work.

So what, you know, what's that for you? Is there anything at this point that keeps you up at night about money or for me or not necessarily keeps you up at night? 'cause for you and me, I don't think anything with money keeps us up at night anymore. What do you worry about with money? Beth's 

Jim Gebhardt: worry. [00:49:00] Oh, it's not my worry, her worry is I die and sure there's life insurance, but there's probably not a lot and I've got some things health-wise that are gonna make it challenging for health insurance.

Right. Or life insurance right now. So it, it, her worry is my worry. I honestly, I don't, I don't worry about money. I, I mean, as I've said to you, and I think I've said on the show that the scarcity that. I've had around money my entire life, which, you know, no offense to my parents, but it comes from my parents.

Sure. And we weren't poor, we weren't rich, we were perfectly middle class. But there was always scarcity talk around money. Sure. And if it wasn't spoken, it was unspoken and or there was comparison, comparison to the Joneses that had, you know, that had this, or they had that, or they had the fancy lake house or you know, we don't 

Matthew Grishman: Right.

Let, lemme steal all the joy from the moment in co compare us to our neighbor. 

Jim Gebhardt: Sure. I had been riddled with that my entire life. And in the last, I don't know, I wish I could put a defining moment on it. Like in the last [00:50:00] three years. Yeah. Four years probably. Somewhere slightly post COVID, eh, two, three years.

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: It's gone. 

Matthew Grishman: Yeah. 

Jim Gebhardt: And Beth even asked me the other day, she's like, so you, I mean, she still worries about money a lot. Sure. And this isn't a comparison either. It's like, I, I honored that. I respect that. But I mean, that's why I'm saying my worry is her worry. Like I desperately would like to rid her of the, the scarcity and the fear around money, but I, I can't.

Right. That's her own journey and I, I can't do that. Yeah. But the freeing, the freedom that comes from not worrying about money. Whew. Whew. I would say at times in my life it was unimaginable. Sure. And now I would just say, how, ha ha. I don't even, I can't even put it into words how unbelievably good it feels to not worry about money.

Now, am I independently wealthy? No. Do I need to go to [00:51:00] work? Yes. But I know what the business that we have. That, that's gonna provide a certain amount of income as long as we do our job and show up and take care of our people. Sure. And in honor of my mother. That's ample. 

Matthew Grishman: Yes. And you also have shared with me, you and I are on the same page with this, that if all of that went away tomorrow because of some legislative stroke of the pen.

Yeah, we could, we can restart it. 

Jim Gebhardt: Would it, 

Matthew Grishman: would 

Jim Gebhardt: it be 

Matthew Grishman: fun? There'd 

Jim Gebhardt: be parts of it. That would be fun. There might be like 2% fun. Right. It'd be a lot of, 

Matthew Grishman: be a 

Jim Gebhardt: lot 

Matthew Grishman: of 

Jim Gebhardt: shoveling. 

Matthew Grishman: Well, and whether it, whether we started the business again doing what we do now, or we decided to pivot and do something completely different life 3.0.

Which I could see you and me at some point saying, you know, this has been fun. We'd like to pivot and do something else in our old age. But you know, I, because that's the entrepreneurial mind, right? The creative building something having impact kinda mind. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: And sustainers. We are not No, no. We're builders.

We're creators. We hire people on the team to do the [00:52:00] sustaining part for us. 'cause that's their unique ability. That exactly. What you're sharing about your lack of financial fear, this freedom you have, again, not financial independence. No. But financial freedom. Freedom from money. Mm-hmm. This money freedom that you have, what I want the tribe to be really clear on is that this is what the whole wealth journey has delivered for you.

Oh yeah. This is the product. What, what's so challenging about Great point. What's so challenging about the podcast platform is that it's really, really hard when we're talking to actually model the behavior that we're trying to talk about. And that to me. I like to make my decisions and I like to follow leadership based on what I see people doing.

Mm-hmm. Not on what I hear them say. Oh, hello. Right. Because what a concept. There's so much bullshit in the world today, right? 

Jim Gebhardt: Are we, are we, are we going down an off ramp of politics [00:53:00] right now? No. No, we're not gonna, I promise. I promise. 

Matthew Grishman: We're staying out of the 24 election right now. We're not going, we're not going there.

Okay. Back to Switzerland. Here we are back. But it's a leadership conversation and I'm, I'm so attracted to watching and seeing the behaviors of others and watching them walk the walk and, and I think one of the things we're, we're trying to do here on the podcast is even though this is a talking platform, we're trying to express and show through example, how we live our lives, how our clients have chosen to live our lives based on the principles of the whole wealth journey.

So back to the regularly scheduled program, you are a product. Of living the whole wealth journey. And, and what I think we've done a, a, a decent job of, we're doing a better job of now, is taking it and making it real. Taking it out of concepts from our heads, observing what we've been through, personally writing it down and realizing there's, there's a method to this madness [00:54:00] and it really starts with getting Excellent point, brother.

Jim Gebhardt: Excellent point. 

Matthew Grishman: I mean, you, you are it, this, this is, I hope our tribe Thank you. I hope our tribe realizes the work, the time, the commitment, what you've had to do to get to a place where you have this freedom from money. Now, the, the promise I think you and I can make, we don't, you and I don't make a lot of promises to people unless we know we can keep 'em.

And one of the promises you and I love making to people when they come see us is if you do what we do and you follow the modules. Of the whole wealth journey, despite being incredibly uncomfortable at times, this is what we predict your outcome to be. Now, let me be impossible to misunderstand. I am not promising that your 401k is going to grow by a certain percentage every year.

We don't do that around here. Right. We can't promise returns or specific dollar [00:55:00] amounts. There's a feeling of being wealthy. There's a feeling of having freedom from money, of achieving financial independence one day. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. I I also, as you're saying all this, the other word that's coming into my head is a level of confidence.

Yes. Oh, absolutely. Right. It's a, it's a, as we've said man times on the show, and we'll say many more is there's a level of clarity that comes through all these conversations. Yes. That leads to a greater sense of confidence in your financial future. Yes. Your current situation as well as your financial future.

Yes. Because of that clarity. And ultimately you end up with a whole new tool bag of skills, which is a higher, greater level of capability. Yes. Uh, not just in yourself, but in kind of the personal advisory board that you start to assemble when you have an advisor and the proper CPA and the proper estate planning attorney and you know, whoever else, mortgage, broker, whoever else you need on that personal advisory board.

That freedom is a byproduct of [00:56:00] all 

Matthew Grishman: of that. Yes, absolutely. So I'm gonna suggest we push pause again and ask yourself that question and get it outta your head. Let it ripple down through that right arm or left arm of yours onto a piece of paper. What keeps you up at night about money? What do you worry about with money?

And after you write that down, spend some time with it. Sharing that with your partner, sharing it with someone. Make it real. Get it out there because you, you can't make progress if you don't know who the enemy is. Oh, a hundred percent. That's the enemy. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. That's the enemy. And if you're brave, like I suspect you are, dig into the why, why is that a fear?

Why are you worried about that? And 

Matthew Grishman: have no judgment around it. Tell me more, like, well, what the effect of that fear is coming true. Yeah. Like why, like, if that happens, what happens? 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. Little, a little bit of cause and effect, but I, I, uh, no, no different than, [00:57:00] you know, with a lot of gratitude. It's, you know, why, why are you grateful for that?

Right. I think when you look at something as, as dark and challenging as your fears around money, like what's keeping you up at night and, you know, one of the smartest trainers that we've ever met years ago suggested that, you know, if you want a better night's sleep, I. Dump all the crapola up in your head on a piece of paper, in a journal before you go to bed to empty it out.

But with, with that concept of, you know, what's the, what, what is the financial fear or fears that are keeping you up at night? Why? And I will share that when we've had, when Beth and I have had that conversation and her fear is my dying, and I then started to think it wasn't a fluid conversation. This happened in fits and starts over the course of about a week was I started going, okay, well there's, there's this in liquid assets, there's this in home equity, there's this, this in life insurance and Gbb Hart Group is still worth something.

Uh, and when you put all of that [00:58:00] together, how does that make you feel? And she was like, oh, wow. I'll be fine. She's like, I don't want you to die. I said, well, I don't wanna die either. Right. But I'm, you know, we don't get to, we, we, we get, we don't get that choice. Yeah. Right. And that getting, getting into that and getting messy with it.

Uh, and it's, I mean, it's hard to stay neutral emotionally on this stuff, right? Sure. Because no, no amount of my coaching or cajoling or force feeding or any, I mean, fear is fear. Fear is 

Matthew Grishman: irrational. Yeah. Right. Well, you, you left something out in that conversation with Beth that you've shared with me and I've watched you do this a thousand times and it's just who you are.

It's part of your unique ability and that's why you sometimes forget to like mention it and share it 'cause it's just part of who you are. You can't show Beth the whole tomato and how much it's worth and get her to feel better before you do what you do better than anyone else in the whole wide world, which is validate or fear.[00:59:00] 

Ah, you do that better than anyone else in the whole wide world. And again, when we, right now, we're, we're just at the beginning of talking about some of these really, really important assets that make up our whole wealth, one of which is money. Right. And, and we're just scratching the surface here on money.

That's the subject in which we're qualified Yes. And licensed to talk about. Licensed. Licensed. I'm gonna say we are very qualified to talk about the other assets. We just don't hold any licenses there. Yes. We're gonna get into some other very, very meaningful assets that make up our whole wealth, one of which is our relationship with our people.

Mm-hmm. And how some of the skills that you were born with have become aware of and therefore have worked on and become world class at are things we're gonna talk about. One of which is how you express empathy to people and validate Beth's feelings of fear. Because when you validate that and help her not feel less than.

[01:00:00] Because of that fear at times, I probably have. You have. You're human. Yes, I am. No way. I still am. Ace. Ace. I'm done. Get me a new partner. I can't have a, I can't sit here in Kibbitz with a guy who's human. I know you need a bot. I need a bot. Gimme a gym bot. We need to create a gym bot. Ai. Where are you? You have done such an incredible job of that, that she's able to hear that we're okay.

You don't validate her fear first. She's never going to hear that you're okay. Doesn't matter. Well said. Yeah. '

Jim Gebhardt: cause you're 

Matthew Grishman: spot on. 

Jim Gebhardt: Yeah. 

Matthew Grishman: I mean, no. Good on you for that. You can't force it. No. Right? No, you absolutely can't. So, so here, look, let's, let's, we got lots of this. We got so much we could sit here and Will and will for days and days and days until Ace kicks us out.

'cause he's got somebody else probably that needs the mics. But for now, we're gonna, we're gonna push pause this, this is, we're right now just getting started. We talked a little in the last episode about what the whole wealth journey is and recognize if, if you haven't figured this out already, we're a couple of guys [01:01:00] who see money different.

We see wealth different. We don't see it through, thank you, Jill. We don't see it the same way that Wall Street trained us to see it. We see wealth management as a human centered thing. It's not a money centered thing. We can still see it the way 

Jim Gebhardt: our Wall Street friends taught us to see it. We don't prefer to see it that way.

Correct. Yeah, we can. We can. We were trained that way. We still have those chips and stuff stuff up in the hard drive. Yes. 

Matthew Grishman: But when you and I sit down and talk about the assets, it, it's different assets. It's a different conversation right there. You and I see that there are three primary assets that make up most people's true wealth.

Money is a big one. But you're gonna hear us talk about money in a way that's maybe a bit different. We are today showing you that a little bit. The second big asset is people. The third big asset is self. And those are the three assets that we're going to spend time [01:02:00] diving into through this curriculum we call the Whole Wealth Journey.

Today, we got started with money. We got started on the right path by unpacking your story. We're gonna continue the unpacking your story module until we're fully unpacked. Correct? Because what we have to do now, now that we have an idea of what financial security looks like, what keeps you up at night about money, now we need to take a little inventory on where you stand.

What is your true wealth? What does it look like? Where are you with it? And I promise this is going to be a much bigger conversation than brokerage statements, bank statements, and how much money you make. It's gonna get deep. It's gonna get fun, and you're probably gonna learn something about yourself you didn't know.

I would actually guarantee that. Oh, well, I love guarantees, especially in our world. So with that brother, let's push pause and I will say that's a wrap. Thanks for joining us today on the Whole Wealth Journey. Whatever your path may look like, our purpose is to make [01:03:00] sure that your way forward aligns with your core values and intentions.

Are you ready to start planning for a future that's rich in wealth and wellbeing? Then click like and subscribe, and make sure you don't miss a single episode of the Whole Wealth Journey. So if we've struck a nerve with 

Jim Gebhardt: you today, 

Matthew Grishman: where do people go? You can find us at ge hart whole wealth.com. That's G-E-B-H-A-R-D-T whole wealth.com.

Jeff Holden: Jim Gab Hart is a registered representative of Integrity Alliance, LLC. Securities and Investment Advisory Services offered through Integrity Alliance, LLC, member SIPC, gab Hart Group Incorporated is not affiliated with Integrity Wealth. Jim Gab Hart and Matthew Grishman, our investment advisor, representatives of Gab Hart Group, incorporated a registered investment advisor.

The opinions in this podcast are for informational purposes only and are not [01:04:00] intended to provide specific advice or investment recommendations to determine which investment or financial advice may be appropriate for you. Consult a financial advisor prior to investing. Any reference to market performance is based on historical information and there is no expressed or implied guarantee of future performance.

Opinions expressed on this program do not necessarily reflect those of Integrity Alliance LLC. The topics discussed and opinions given are not intended to address the specific needs of any listener. Ebhart Group Incorporated does not offer legal or tax advice. Listeners are encouraged to discuss their financial needs with the appropriate professional regarding your individual circumstance