Beyond the Mantra: A Deep Dive into Intend, Align, Invite

What does it really mean to speak soulfully when you’re in front of a crowd, feeling the nerves, trying to stay connected?

In this intimate follow-up conversation, Dana Baugh returns with thoughtful questions about the deeper layers of Lauri Smith’s Vocal Presence Path approach to soulful speaking. Together, they revisit the roots of the “Intend, Align, Invite” mantra, unpack its evolution, and explore how it can live not just in your mind—but in your body.

From navigating resistance and inner critics to remembering the aliveness you were born with, this episode is a rich, embodied journey into the heart of speaking. It’s not about memorizing steps—it’s about remembering who you are and letting your voice rise from there.

Whether you’re new to this approach or reconnecting with the roots, this episode highlights the magic that happens when we stop trying to control every detail and start trusting the aliveness in the moment. 

TAKEAWAYS

1. 3’s are “sticky.”
   Grouping content into batches of 3 helps everybody remember—from the speaker to the audience.
2. Trust yourself and the process (in speaking and in life).
   When you do, you unlock a deeper connection with your world.
3. Stop trying to be a know-it-all.
   Less explanation can lead to more connection.
4. You don’t need to micromanage every detail.
   True presence emerges when we allow ourselves to respond rather than control.
5. Old parts might resist.
   As we align our body, breath, and energy, protective parts may push back. That’s part of the process—not a problem.
6. The way out is through.
   Instead of pushing discomfort away, feel it. That’s how we transform sensation into presence and aliveness.
7. Every breath is a chance to begin again.
   If things feel off track, you can pause, breathe, and start again—right there in the moment.
8. Invite, don’t push.
   When we invite others into our energy, our speaking becomes magnetic.
9. Great speaking is an intimate conversation.
   When you listen deeply and trust yourself, you create space for real connection.

Connect with Dana
dana@dlbaugh.com

Story Magic
A Soulful Speaking Playshop for loving rebels on a soul-driven mission.

Join me for Story Magic — a live, interactive Soulful Speaking Playshop where you’ll learn powerful secrets from the ancient art of theatre for telling engaging, dynamic stories.

The Speaker Alter Ego Quiz

Take the Speaker Alter Ego quiz to find out which protective mask hides your natural radiance so you can learn how to get present, connect deeply, and share your vision when it matters most!

https://voice-matters.com/speaker-alter-ego-quiz/

Chapters

• 0:00 Setting the Stage for Today’s Conversation
• 2:31 The Origin of Intend, Align, Invite
• 4:13 Embracing the Power of Three
• 9:20 Trusting Yourself and the Process
• 16:49 The Evolution of Intend
• 25:13 The Evolution of Align
• 29:43 The Dance Between the Parts and the Higher Self
• 36:25 The Way Out is Through
• 44:04 From Pushing to Inviting
• 47:21 Feel for the Intimacy

Transcript

Lauri: 1:08

Hello everyone and welcome back to the Soulful Speaking podcast. Dana Baugh is back again with us today. She's incredibly curious, so she's going to ask me some questions that she's curious about and you may be curious about. And before we dive into that, Dana, I'm curious. What has it been like for you? What has come up since you appeared the first time?

Dana: 1:37

Yeah, well, it is connected to what I'm curious about. When I was on your podcast as a guest, I very much was holding the mantra and the practice or process intend align, invite, because it works very well. It's a great process to ground me and guide me and I just had realized when I was on as the guest it was like I felt like I really got into intend. I was into a line a bit and then I feel like a line was sometimes hard to hold on to. The thing I held on to was the intend, and so it then tied to some my curiosity about.

Dana: 2:32

We've known each other for a while and I had the good fortune early on to meet you and go through the process with you of your process for supporting speakers as they find their voice and put it out there in the world in a authentic, meaningful and impactful way, and I have not found anything else quite like this. So I have big gratitude about that. When I first met you, it we went through like a step, it was like seven steps, it was there's deeper process and then, fast forwarding over time, it became intend align, invite, which I really, really appreciated because that I can remember and I'll hold on to what's happened. What happened to me when I was the guest speaker speaking was I realized I, I know the, I know the mantra, I know what it means, but some of the deeper nuances, it's like I've forgotten them and I want to sort of reconnect, because the mantra is beautiful, to have the short version to intend to line invite with the deeper nuances and and I I'm not sure, but I feel like what happened for me was, again, I was getting some of the things going on, but not all of the things going on.

Lauri: 4:06

So yeah, yeah, as you're talking about it right now I can't remember if I've said this to you before One of the reasons that I shifted from it was a seven step path, with tools and things on each step of the path, and I was working with all seven steps, wanting people to remember them, working with all seven steps, wanting people to remember them. And then I presented at a conference right after a good friend of mine, meryl Shaw. She was presenting on the content of speaking and the power of three. So when I use those words with you now and talk about how powerful three is, she was the one who used the phrase the power of three first and I started borrowing it from her.

Lauri: 4:59

We both have a theater background and neuroscience says that threes are sticky for our brains and that's sort of ingrained in us. We create stories innately with a beginning, a middle and an end. A lot of our flags have three colors in them. So here in the United States it's red, white and blue, and I decided to lean into that because I would and, to be honest, that because I would and, to be honest, there was also a bit going on for me in the early days of even me thinking I need to give them every single thing that I have in order for this to be valuable. You know, and over time I let go of more and more and more and more and more of that. So the you know stickiness of the power of three and me letting go of feeling like I needed to give you every single thing that could possibly be a value. You know, cram as many words as I could into an experience. So I leaned into that and I looked at the seven step path and it just sort of rose up one day that it was like, oh, if I just made the outline a little different, this naturally fits into three things intend, align, invite. So the tools and the other things are still there and I frequently talk about it being like if we're watching Steph Curry's basketball shot and we hire a shooting coach, they might give us three things to focus on Bend your knees, look at the back of the rim and follow through, and you can be thinking that while you're shooting and eventually, mastery is not thinking about it. Yeah, hurry is not thinking. Bend my knees, look at the. His body just knows it.

Lauri: 7:09

So I feel like when I work with people now I give them this intend, align, invite, 60,000 foot view. We do some things and break it down and then go more into intend and deal with soul suckers, which are the things soul suckers and our other parts that might be not setting the intention that our highest self would set. Really work with aligning the body, the breath and the energy. Really work with.

Lauri: 7:42

What does it mean to invite when you're in a crowd so that the body is getting a deeper experience? And then we come back up to the phrase intend, align, invite is intend, align, invite. And I was even shooting an episode with someone where we took that 60,000-foot view. We went down into it and we played with it and then we came up and he was going to speak again and I kind of reminded of all the pieces and I saw that overwhelmed look on his face and I went okay, we just experienced intend, align, invite and I said something like trust that your body has a lived experience of what that means and just go for it. And I'm here to be your shooting coach who says, well, you could bend your knees a little more, you could strengthen the inviting a little more, or I was craving a deeper breath. It's like having the shooting coach who looks at what pieces are still not fully feeling like they're in Steph Curry mastery.

Dana: 8:51

I really appreciate that how you teach. Now it sounds like you do take people back to those roots, but then you, like you said, you just sort of ask them to put it down and trust themselves and then coach. That's how you reconnect them back to the roots I'm hearing is by seeing what would add to something yeah, more and more.

Lauri: 9:20

And, as you're talking to me right now, it's occurring to me that the more I'm trusting myself, the more I'm actually doing things a little differently and inviting the people that I'm working with to step into a state of trust. And it also reminds me of how my favorite acting instructor ever, richard Side, how he used to deal with the inner critic. And every actor in the world I mean every actor that I know wants to get up on stage and be completely and utterly in the moment. What the rest of the world knows as the flow state, and we want to hate the inner critics, we don't want them to be there. And he was the first person who kind of drew a dividing line in the sand.

Lauri: 10:14

There's a point to the inner critics. When you're in rehearsals, there's a time that you want to try a thing and then criticize, critique, judge, assess. What did I like about that run through and what did I not like about that run through? And everybody's doing that, from the director to all of the actors. Your inner critics are doing some judging. You feel it, something feels off, and then you figure out what was it that felt off? And then you go in and do it again and then at a certain point it's time to jump in without that voice, and particularly in theater it's time to jump in without that voice. And particularly in theater. You, as the actor, jump in without that voice 100%, and it feels like a kid playing make-believe and that's why we all want that in-the-moment feeling and you trust your director to then critique anything that you might need for you.

Lauri: 11:16

And I believe that whole process from actors to speakers is much better when you have that trust between the director and the actors or someone watching your speech, and that it's all better when the actor or the speaker is in a state of that kind of vibrance and aliveness.

Lauri: 11:42

That's how I work as a director. I don't tell them where to move, like I don't come in on day one with like on this line, you, you're going to move over to the plant. I watch them play and move and then I shape it and then later on I invite them to play like the children, just going for it, trusting that if something isn't working, I'm out here to give you the fine tuning and the adjustments to have it work even better. And to me the aliveness is the most important part. It's how I'm built, so that's why I would rather start with let's help everybody to be really alive and connected, and then, as a director, any finishing touches are much, much easier than chasing every single detail of how they move, what they say when they cross over to the plant, when they sit down.

Dana: 12:38

What's so interesting when you share that One. I recognize it because I recognize that's how you have coached me, and appreciate it because there's something so mixed. I think it makes people very self-conscious, that other kind of way of doing it, like stand here, say this, do this, move this way. But I do know, are there still people that, and particularly from speaking and acting that, coach that way? I mean I'm just curious, how does that? Does that even work? It just feels like it brings up so much self-consciousness and just performing without heart. I don't know if that's true.

Lauri: 13:20

It does happen. I don't actually know how many speaking coaches are still working that way. I have a feeling they're out there because they are out there in theater, okay, and so I will say this I have been in a production very recently where the director's style was more of a precision based at times, leading toward micromanaging rather than letting us be the clay and play and find some things, and we were all asking, because we're a physical, ensemble based, innovative theater company and we're used to a certain level of just try a thing a million times and it was incredibly challenging and I think people on both sides learned a lot and as an actor, it is our job to work with whoever the director is. Yeah, so if they're, you know it's your job to take how they're asking you to do it, to try it, to try it with 100% commitment and also to say I tried it with 100% commitment and here's why it's not working for me and it's still not my favorite. It's very hard for me to do and in this particular production that I'm thinking of the end result for me from the day after opening and onward. You know we got this amazing review, um, audiences loved the show on opening day people were looking at me and saying, oh, what an incredible performance.

Lauri: 15:10

And with the ones that I knew and trusted who were also, you know, like my husband and other core members who were not in the show I kind of went just wait until we've breathed into this, a little bit Like great, I'm happy that it looks so amazing on the outside and I happy that it looks so amazing on the outside. And when we debriefed it, I did tell people like I'm 52 years old, I've got a lot of adult life post-college. I have never, ever, been that tight on an opening night Ever. Now I did work through it, like on the day after opening, which happened to be when a lot of the reviewers came. It was like I was craving surrender, so much that it didn't take as long, like I thought it was going to take a while to breathe into it. It's like I just went, I'm jumping into the sandbox and I'm going to do the shape that we have and I'm going to completely open and soften and surrender into it, including, like, all of the muscles in my physical body. I felt more like me.

Dana: 16:19

Okay, wow. Again, what I'm hearing is there are different ways to do it, but you sort of know what works for you. And now it's really interesting I'm curious about if we just took them one at a time, like how they have changed for you over time, like what intend means to you now, and just how that might have evolved.

Lauri: 16:46

Yeah, there's a lot less words. There's a lot less words. Intend. Originally came the words and they're in my book. If anybody out there reads it they're all the old ones are in there. So it was root in a sense of purpose, and I still love the phrase root in a sense of purpose. And yet when I'm attempting to give it to people who can be stepping out on a stage and going, oh my God, what did Lori tell me? Intend is much shorter and so we, when we are doing intend, that's when you can probably feel like, oh hey, I vaguely remember when we first started working together.

Lauri: 17:30

There was something about roots and values and purpose. I'm still bringing those words in and bringing those concepts in, and now it feels more like it comes up when it's in the room Rather than me thinking that I need to use the words root in a sense of purpose and I need to tell you what a value is and we need to come up with what is your life purpose statement? I I start with what serves the people and then the other things that can sort of take that deeper and make it richer come up when someone in the room needs it, or even more so if a wave of people in the programs that I'm leading all feel like they're saying they don't know what their purpose is, they don't know why they're here, they're called but they don't even know why they're called, then we might go off and do a whole values excavation exercise I really love that because, again, it's trusting what people need and um, and I also think it's powerful.

Dana: 18:41

if you start with intend and people are experiencing that, you can sort of check in to see if I'm from my own experience, having been in classes people just sort of naturally talk about purpose and then you can build from there versus which is more powerful than you giving us a bunch of stuff to remember.

Lauri: 19:03

Yeah, yeah, and helping you if you don't need to remember it so much when you're speaking, as it needs to be there and you be connected to it.

Dana: 19:19

I love how you just said that yeah, yeah, and I really appreciate that because, as you're sharing this, I hadn't thought of those words. But that is what I'm wanting. I don't want to memorize it. I hadn't thought of it that way. The way my brain usually works is like I'm going to memorize this and then I'll have it to connect back to, but I just want it to be there and I want to feel connected to it, so I believe.

Lauri: 19:49

Yeah, like we don't need Steph Curry to turn and give us a dissertation on why, bending your knees, how the knee functions, all that kind of stuff. We just want Steph Curry to shoot the ball and have it go in the net. Steph Curry only wants to shoot the ball and have it go in the net. Steph Curry only wants to shoot the ball and have it go in the net. At some point I shifted or over time shifted to knowing Dana doesn't really want to turn and give a dissertation on what a soul's purpose is and what values are and how those relate to the moment that she's speaking. Dana wants to speak At some point.

Lauri: 20:30

If I teach other people to do what I do, then those people might actually need to be able to not give a dissertation but to answer questions and to help people find those things the way that I do. But if you're not going to teach it, you don't need to know all that stuff. You need to know what helps you put the ball in the basket, what helps you speak in the way that you want to speak.

Dana: 21:00

And I'm also hearing you say, when someone gets there on their own, they are, you know, have the power of the three. The intend align and invite, and an intend is they're playing back what they're experiencing and they have this talk about a sense of purpose. Yeah, I'm just thinking about how it can come, that's how it can come out and that's all they need.

Lauri: 21:32

Yeah, yeah, and they it's like they know what they want to have happen in the room. And a lot of times we end up feeling a sense of purpose when we set an intention. If anybody is ever confused about what intention should I set for this talk versus that talk, versus this podcast, experience, that might be a time where I might say experience. That might be a time where I might say what's your soul's work? How does it connect to your life purpose? How does this moment connect to your life purpose? And then they get a clarity over which intention they're going to go with on that day. From how does it connect to your greater life purpose?

Dana: 22:22

I appreciate you saying that, because that is another thing that has caught me in a moment of like. When we're doing the intend is it's like a lot of times what comes to me is I want clarity and connection. I want clarity for myself, I want clarity for people who are listening and I want to feel connection and I want them to feel connection, and sometimes I'm like, well, that can't always be what it is. So I was curious about like, ok, what I'm doing now is I sort of just see what comes up. But I appreciate how you ask that question to help possibly something different come up.

Lauri: 24:17

Yeah, yeah, and I love both letting it come up. Yeah, yeah, and I love both Letting it come up. There are times where our intuition is really talking to us nice and loud. If we ask ourselves what do I want my intention to be today, we feel something, we hear something, we just know. And then there are other days where we're a little more off or it's higher stakes, and then having a question like how does this moment connect to my life purpose can help kind of cut through our own static.

Dana: 24:54

Yeah, Would you mind talking about the other two align again, just as? How has that evolved for you? Yeah?

Lauri: 25:07

Align is aligning the body, the breath and the energy with that intention and with our fullest expression. Our fullest expression In the old seven-step model there were three different, separate steps out of the seven Embody what's important, breathe life into the experience and energize yourself and the space Still like those words? Yeah, I might still come out at some point. And if the end result now, which it is and as I'm saying this, I think I just simplified and I didn't know what is true that's about to come out of my mouth when I simplified If the goal is for someone to more just be able to feel it and do it, feel this way of speaking and do it instead of doing it their old way, like if I used to shoot a three-pointer with my elbow out really wide and not bending my knees, and I've taught myself this new way and the goal is just go in the game and shoot it, the new way where the ball goes in. Having embody what's important, breathe life into the experience, energize yourself in the space is very different from a line and knowing what that means for your body, your breath and your energy. Yeah, because you've broken it down, but you don't need that many words to be going through your head to go align. Yeah, and I am remembering now I don't remember if it was one of your classes or another one classes or another one we would do some things where we played with sounds and aligning the body, aligning the breath and aligning the energy, and making ohm sounds and S's and Z's. And there was another moment where it was time for people to speak again and they started to get that like wait. And I said do you feel the thing that you just did when we were making the Z sounds? Do that while you're talking? Oh, okay, that I can do. That's the difference between embody what's important, breathe life into the experience and energize the space and align. Okay, let's just do that and then we'll give it a go.

Dana: 27:44

Yeah, I'm going to play back just to make sure that I'm catching some things, because I just, yeah, I find that really interesting. So now you're trusting that you don't have to start with all of that foundational thing. You can say a line and the short version of what that means, as you just did yeah. Then, as they start doing that, you might say let's do some Zs, let's do this or that, yeah.

Lauri: 28:20

Okay, yeah, based on what's actually happening with aligning body, breath and energy for that person. Okay, and, as you asked that question, it's also trusting. I would say this a lot, and I still say this that we came in as babies and our bodies, our breath and our energy were aligned for fullest expression when we were born, so we knew it and then we got taught not to do it. So we don't necessarily need the 10,000 plus hours that a great basketball player is going to need to become great, because we're remembering rather than learning fresh, and I feel like, on some level, I started giving a you intend align, invite and align body, breath and energy, and a snippet of what that was pretty high level, pretty quick, because I'm helping people remember and reconnect with what they already knew when they were a baby.

Dana: 29:33

Yeah, is there you mentioned before when we were talking about intent, about there, in this part of the process of Align. Is there anything different happening with this dance between your parts and the higher self?

Lauri: 30:11

What a beautiful question. Yeah, so what happened in my body when you asked that question is I feel like setting the intention really helps. So I have a background in theater voice for the theater, not singing, but voice for the theater to project enough that people can hear you and feel you in the pre microphones in the floor and on every single actors body era.

Lauri: 30:46

and so theater, voice, people, they're doing this align body, breath and energy thing hmm, that's what they're doing, and I went to a conference once and I brought in the idea of intend, probably in an older form. So I'm working with professional breathers and colleagues who do the same align body, breath and energy thing that I do. But I only did intend get up and do something, and then I worked with Intend, with the whole group, and then I had them get up and do it again and they were shocked and in awe and amazed that, without touching anybody's rib cage or talking about the breath, they were all breathing deeper and had more ease and aliveness in their performances. Oh, interesting, wow. Had more ease and aliveness in their performances oh, interesting, wow. So that's why intend always comes first, even if somebody has a strong intention. We're still going to visit it, for you know, 80% of the people in the room can use revisiting it.

Lauri: 31:55

Yeah, when we start to work deeply with aligning the body, the breath and the energy, work deeply with aligning the body, the breath and the energy. When you asked that question, I felt for myself and others memories of when it feels vulnerable and the parts want to come back in to protect us. Yeah, because out in the outside world we've been suppressed and armored and protecting ourselves and hiding and doing what all the other bodies seem to be doing. And when we open up, when we align our bodies I talk a lot about opening the heart Well, that can feel really vulnerable. So then, you know, we might have an inner critic thought or we might feel more of a visceral sensation and it's like a part of us is wanting to shut that back down. And we're not even necessarily having the thought of this is dangerous, but a part of us feels danger and wants to shut it down.

Dana: 34:05

Yeah.

Lauri: 34:08

And same thing with breath and kind of keeping the energy small. I feel like some of the parts are in there trying to shut down the vulnerability and the expansion, and for some people they might have thoughts about that and for some of us it's more like we start feeling a whole lot of visceral sensations and fighting impulses, like my heart wants to open, but then another part is trying to shut it down at the same time, and I of course, always get really excited when that confusion happens. For the poor person that's experiencing it it's incredibly uncomfortable.

Dana: 34:46

but when that confusion hits the body, but when that confusion hits the body, the part of the person that's willing to experience the change is actually already. You know it's like whoa. You know parts are wanting to come in and not have us be so vulnerable, not have the heart open so much, and on the one hand, it is extremely uncomfortable and the thought is oh my gosh, I'm going to blow this because this is happening. The other thought that came in was what a great learning experience like to learn what this feels like, to pay attention to it happening, even though it was like I sort of didn't want it to happen, but it was like wow, this is to really understand what this feels like and then how to come back. I have no idea what I actually did to come back, except probably I don't know I wasn't consciously thinking about it, but what do you help people with to come back when that happens?

Lauri: 36:02

Yeah, I immediately wanted to ask you how did you come back? What happened? It can depend on the person, and the kind of overarching headline that I want the world to know is that the way out is through. When you feel that moment of I feel vulnerable, different parts are trying to shut me back down. Different parts are trying to shut me back down. It's not to do what the rest of the world is doing, which is shut down, numb up, put a smile on your face, pretend to be fine. It's feel the vulnerability and a lot of times it's reconnecting back to the intention and finding a connection with someone in the room, or the knowing that someone in the room needs to hear what you have to say, which can help the, the person experiencing it, to go through.

Lauri: 37:07

Because, in reality, we all deserve to be seen for who we really are. For a lot of my clients who have some kind of a soul-driven mission, they like to serve others when it can be. Both. You, dana, deserve to be seen and heard and felt for who you are, and there's somebody out there who also needs what you're bringing. That makes it enough for the person to keep going, whereas if I just said, well, dana, you're a human who's beautiful. You are one in eight billion soul. You deserve to be seen and loved exactly as you are. You might be like that's nice. I need this to be for me and others in order to have the courage to keep going through all that sensation. Yeah, that's so true.

Dana: 38:08

What's really resonating with me is when you talked about the way through. When that happens when you're speaking, is to not try to get away from the feeling, which is absolutely what happens, at least to me. First, it's like get out of here, you know, push it. I always have this image of that. I have a big beach ball and I'm holding it underwater like get down, get down, which takes a lot of energy and attention, yeah.

Lauri: 38:35

And the way through is like to feel it like, oh, that's there now and not let it take over, but to like, oh, that, whatever it is, um, yeah, it feels yeah, yeah, and harnessing it and channeling it into the experience is where the real charisma, presence, energy in the room comes from, whereas shoving the beach ball down and I'm good, there's no beach ball here we're holding back. What can be the charisma if we do that?

Dana: 39:14

Yeah, you're just reminding me. I don't remember when was it. It was last year. I went to meet with someone, that a very high profile person in Washington DC. It felt like a very high stakes situation and they were like so tell me about yourself. And I remember, you know and had thought about it before, that they might ask me this and so launching into you know some kind of credentials, you know that pedigree kind of thing. And all of a sudden I'm like, oh my God, there's a voice in my head. It's like you're a talking head, like you know. I couldn't feel anything from here down and I'm just, you know, doing what you're saying, smiling, doing this thing, and inside myself I'm. I know I wasn't consciously thinking this, but it was sort of like what?

Dana: 40:05

do I do now, because I do not want to keep being in this numb smiley tell my credential kind of state, I'm not feeling or connecting with this person.

Dana: 40:18

So I just stopped and I said yeah, I took a breath and I said let me start again there. I said you asked me a question and I went down this path. I said I would like to take us down another path and then I just started again from a place of being in my body again and having acknowledged that part that thought it needed to impress this person and sort of let it do that but then shift it and it was to your point. I think what you're saying is by doing that, it really maybe was even more powerful than if I had started off, you know, and that hadn't happened. Something happened in that moment.

Lauri: 41:01

Yeah, yeah. Well, they got to see you as a vulnerable, whole human being Most of us love to see. Especially if we're going to work with someone, we want to know can I work with this person through the tough times? And if you're having a moment where you go, I'm going to start again. It's like they've seen what you will be like.

Lauri: 41:31

What I would probably say to someone and I have a very good friend who introduced me to my husband she's a singing instructor, the harmonica Zs that we do come from her, and she said the phrase when I was working with her every breath is a chance to begin again. Oh, I like that, and it's true for speaking, for being in a meeting with someone. You can just stop and start over and that breath. You know we can take more if we need to take a couple breaths, and it was hugely freeing to know if it feels like I'm totally off on the wrong foot, Inhale, take a breath and choose to go where you'd rather this be going, instead of the hamster wheel of like, oh God, I'm performing and I don't want to be.

Dana: 42:30

What's funny is you said that and I appreciate how you gave the examples is I realized that when I'm one-on-one with another human being, I feel I now feel I didn't before, I now feel the ability to do that and can do it fairly easily. I still really struggle to do it when I'm speaking in a group or being recorded. It feels like you're on a train going one way and it's going at a certain speed and you cannot just say stop. But I love the reminder that the same principles apply.

Lauri: 43:12

Yeah, and the more we it's working a new muscle. So it's harder for you right now to do that when you're in a group circumstance or there's a recording button that's gone on, and the more you practice it, the easier it will get, just like it did in the one-on-one situations from the practicing of it yeah it occurred to me that I haven't really said much about inviting.

Lauri: 43:50

That used to be connect truly, madly and deeply with others and take people along for the ride. If I could replace the word take with invite, if I could replace the word take with invite, you know that was very conscious because take people along for the ride, it was catchy, it served at the time and what I know now is I'm holding the space, I'm inviting you. There's an amazing ride of transformation and growth and coming home to yourself, and it's not. I'm not taking you. I'm holding a space and you're choosing when to get on that ride. And so it's invite and I know it includes listening to the non-verbal half of the conversation that I put the holding space kind of back in the energy piece, hugging the room with your energy space, kind of back in the energy piece, hugging the room with your energy, and the people choose when they want to come.

Lauri: 45:16

I feel like I'm really, really good at that when I'm teaching and giving a speech and the place that I have learned it more is in the like marketing for my own business. When I really want to work with you is on the line. You know that's. That's my NBA finals or Super Bowl, and and right in this moment, it feels like I've had a big breakthrough, where it's starting to just feel like I'm having conversations with people and if we choose to work together, we choose, choose to work together, and if we don't, it's you know, nobody's going to explode, nobody's going to die if we don't work together.

Dana: 46:06

It sounds like the words, like the connect madly deeply, authentically. It's again still all in there, but it is just the letting people find their way into what it means to just having the word invite and then yeah, and having the word invite, I feel like it.

Lauri: 46:35

It opens everyone up and if I were teaching other people to do what I do, I would probably bring the truly madly deeply back and sometimes I might even say it to someone again, like we've been talking about, when it's in the room, when it looks like they're making eye contact, but it feels like you're connecting, but you're not connecting truly madly deeply. Yeah, something you know and I get curious of like is there a veil here? What is it that's sort of making it feel like you're connected, but it's not this truly madly deeply intimate feeling connected and I get curious and I just start to play and ask questions and have them try things until all of a sudden there's a ah there it is things until all of a sudden there's a ah, there it is.

Dana: 47:34

Yeah, that it's funny. You use the word. Intimacy is what I was thinking about when it, when it unfolds organically in that way of you invite, hold the container and they step into it, is the you feel that intimacy yeah, yeah, and that's so funny.

Lauri: 47:50

As we're recording this, it's Valentine's Day week, it's almost Valentine's Day tomorrow and the mini so that I released this week was great. Speaking is intimate, yeah.

Dana: 48:03

I can see that. Yeah, well, you have answered my questions that I was curious about in terms of and I just so appreciate I really do feel connected back to the roots of the deeper things that live, the nuances that are there, and then how to hold that into the mantra of intend, align, invite. Was there anything else that we haven't talked about that you wanted to put on the table today?

Lauri: 48:34

I don't think so. Well, I will say I am grateful for you bringing your curiosity and doing this experiment. I am at my best when I'm responding to something that's in the room, so this is a version of that you saying hey, I'm curious about this, and saying yes when I invited you to come do this. I know there are other people out there who have similar questions, and if I had sat here on my own and just tried to do a solo episode, it would have been a much different experience than responding to your questions, knowing that that will help other people. So thank you for playing and saying yes to this. I really enjoyed it.