Speaking & Writing with Soul: Amy Vogel on Finding Your Voice

How do you find your voice—whether in writing, speaking, or leading? In this episode of Soulful Speaking, I sit down with Amy Vogel, an author and book coach who helps women share their stories and turn their publishing dreams into reality.

Amy’s journey took her from sales to preaching to publishing, and she shares the lessons she’s learned about authentic communication along the way. We dive into relational speaking, overcoming the fear of not having a story to tell, and why embracing imperfection leads to deeper connections.

TAKEAWAYS

1. Your story is already inside you. Many people think they don’t have a story worth sharing, but it's often just waiting to be uncovered.
2. Speaking and writing are both relational. Whether on stage or on paper, great communication is about connecting with your audience.
3. Perfection kills connection. The more we try to be perfect, the less we engage with the people we’re speaking to.
4. Your audience is rooting for you. Whether you’re auditioning, giving a talk, or publishing a book, people want you to succeed.
5. Set an intention for your audience. Before speaking or writing, ask: What do I want people to experience?
6. Be the guide, not the hero. When sharing your story, remember—you’re not Luke Skywalker; you’re Yoda, guiding your audience.
7. Creativity is a process, not an instant download. Writing (like speaking) is about discovering clarity through the act of doing.
8. Don’t be afraid to have fun. The best speakers and writers allow room for spontaneity and human moments.
9. Authenticity is what people remember. More than your words, they remember how you made them feel.

About Amy
Amy Vogel is an author and women's book coach. Her fiction books are themed for feminine empowerment, offering readers a fresh perspective on what it means to be a woman. Through her nonfiction works, she provides practical tools for healing and finding hope. As an entrepreneur and coach, Amy is dedicated to empowering women to share their stories, helping them cast a vision for a better world by turning their publishing dreams into reality.

Connect with Amy
www.amywvogel.com

Story Magic
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The Speaker Alter Ego Quiz

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https://voice-matters.com/speaker-alter-ego-quiz/

Chapters

• 1:32 From Sales to Preaching: Amy’s Early Speaking Journey
• 4:32 How Amy Found Her Voice in Writing
• 6:07 Overcoming Self-Doubt & Trusting the Nudge
• 11:42 The Emotional Journey of Writing a Book
• 14:25 Finding Your Voice in Speaking & Writing
• 16:54 Setting an Intention: The Power of Relating to Your Audience
• 19:35 Your Story as a Service: Be the Guide, Not the Hero
• 22:52 Embracing Imperfection: Why Audiences Love Realness
• 27:45 Pivot Pivot: Fun Rapid-Fire Questions!

Transcript

Lauri: 1:08

Hello and welcome back to the Soulful Speaking podcast. My guest today is Amy Vogel. She's an author and a woman's book coach, dedicated to empowering women to share their stories, helping them cast a vision for a better world by turning their publishing dreams into reality. Amy, where did your speaking journey start, amy? Where did your speaking?

Amy: 1:33

journey start? Well, I guess technically it started. I was in sales for about a decade and so that's really where I cut my teeth. I figured out how to engage an audience, how to tweak a message and presentation to the context of the room, to the interests I won't say needs, but the interests of who I was in front of, and then took a little break from that, was always involved in church growing up and then into adulthood, and so I taught Bible studies, I taught groups and eventually moved into a role where I was preaching every other week and teaching and leading, and so that sales experience benefited me in working for the church. And then now that cumulative experience gives me a real ease and comfort in front of people because it's just like this a conversation, it's a it's, it's a lot of fun yeah, what was the transition like when you went from sales into preaching?

Amy: 2:49

you know, um, I've joked before that I went from selling software to selling Jesus. It's an aspect of that that you want to convince people of what you're saying, but you also want to make them think and help them make their own decisions. But obviously, preaching there's a sacred text component to it. So what you really want to achieve when you're preaching is a little different than speaking, but it's the same premise in the connection that you want to make with the people that you're speaking to and that was always my goal in sales was relational connection, continuing to develop that relationship, and so I had that same focus. It's actually called relational preaching and so you relate the text that you're preaching on, you relate that in some way to your audience, to who's in the room, and then I preached during COVID too. So that was a really interesting experience because you preached to a screen.

Lauri: 4:01

How did you navigate the switch to COVID? What did you end up finding that worked for you?

Amy: 4:07

Well, the biggest lesson I learned in preaching overall, and in sales as well, is that nobody knows what you're about to say. Nobody knows what you're supposed to say.

Lauri: 4:17

So you have been called now to help women share their stories and find their voices through publishing. How did that journey begin for you?

Amy: 4:33

I had an idea to write a book, and one of the pastors at the church that I worked well, I was actually at this point I was just a volunteer and so he knew a guy in publishing and the content that I wanted to write was not something that we could really find a book. That spoke to it. And, um, uh, you know, it was one of those things where he was like, well, we can't find it, so you go write it and then I'll present it to my friend. And that's exactly what happened. And so I was traditionally published for my first book and, um, uh, the the funny part about it was I didn't know what I didn't know, and so that was a great experience for me.

Amy: 5:14

Um, then, the church that I was working for, which was part of a larger church, a larger church shut our part of, you know, our church down, and, um, I was already, I was just toast, I was just done. And so, um I um took I don't know about five months off and just try to regroup, figure out where I was going to want to, where I was going to go with things, and I thought you know what I'm? I started writing again and, um I I, I'm sorry. The dogs just all of a sudden wanted to be on top of me.

Lauri: 5:57

They were totally fine it happens a lot when there's a really juicy energy there. All of a sudden, all of the pets want to be included in what's happening.

Amy: 6:06

Right, yeah, so I was looking for a job and I couldn't really find anything that was. I was looking for a job and I couldn't really find anything that was. I mean, my, my background is so I had a nearly 10 year gap between my church job and my sales job because I was at home with my girls, and so, you know, it was just like I don't, maybe I should just maybe it's, maybe it's time for me to do my own thing. And I told several of my friends this and they were like yeah, we've been waiting for you to do thing. And I told several of my friends this and they were like yeah, duh, we've been waiting for you to do this and I was like well, somebody could have told me right what was it that they were seeing.

Amy: 6:43

It took you a long time to see Just that I could do this on my own, that I could be an entrepreneur, that I could write my own books, publish my own books, speak, and the coaching happened organically. I didn't set out my company for that to be a part of it, but I think, just being the leader that I am and the person who sees things a little differently than other people and I'm so, you know, in the church, it's funny we're supposed to appeal to everybody. More than anything, I realized I worked so hard to be almost gender neutral in my appeal and yet it was always the women that I connected with. And that makes sense. Being a woman and having the experience that I did and in my life, it just it just connects. Being a wife, being a mom, it just connects better. And so I finally let go of the idea that I needed to be the person for everybody and just focused purely on helping women. And that's when things really started to ramp up and take off. And it's a process too, like writing my books.

Amy: 7:52

I knew I was writing for me and people like me, and so it became about aligning that message and that clarity with what I was already doing. My friends, they just they saw in me that I had the gifting, I had the capability where you just often can't see that yourself. You need people speaking into that. You need people who can see you more holistically than you see yourself. I don't live up here, so I give them more freedom to say no, you'd be, you'd be really good at this, go do it. And so I've learned to trust those nudges and those close people. And so I did. I went for it.

Lauri: 8:38

And now it sounds like you're one of the voices helping to do that for other women.

Amy: 8:43

Yes, yes.

Lauri: 8:45

What do you love about working for women, now that you have followed that calling?

Amy: 8:56

that you have followed that calling. Yeah, it's that connection piece where we connect as women on so many levels. There's the spiritual, the emotional, the mental. Often our goals and dreams are similar, our limiting beliefs and fears are similar, and so you know there's tears of the way that you can speak into it, but also there's this willingness that women have to pour into each other that makes us for each other what I found in general more coachable. And what sort of emotional journey are you noticing in people as they write books? Initially start out, you're thinking about yourself, and then there's the shift that happens somewhere around if it's a nonfiction book somewhere around chapter four, chapter five, one. The voice starts coming together and then the ability to speak beyond your own experience and really connect with your ideal reader happens about a third of the way through the process and then things really start to pick up.

Lauri: 11:26

What sort of challenges do the writers that you coach face, even getting started?

Amy: 11:36

Generally speaking, the question is I don't think, I don't know where to get the content from. There's this idea that you have to create it out of thin air when in truth it's all already within you, it's all already in there, but we think we have to have it easily accessible in our minds, at our fingertips, before we can start. That's not the creative process. The creative process is the initial. Is there the initial idea? The initial forward movement is there. Then, once you start writing, the rest of it comes together. There is a clarifying of motivation, of message. That really has to happen as you write it's not just going to download, you've got to write it.

Lauri: 12:36

Yeah, yeah. It strikes me how similar that is to when someone is speaking and the number of times that I've had people people generally come to me when they're going to do a talk and or tell their story at either end of a spectrum one end they're actually saying I don't have a story that's interesting.

Lauri: 13:04

I don't know what. I would say it's a. They think it's a complete blank. Yeah, and whether it's one on one or in a group session, they'll talk all about how they don't have the thing. And I'll listen and take notes and then go here's the first draft of all the things you said when you were saying you didn't have anything Very similar it's the talking of. It is like the mirror image to the. You got to sit down and write it and then the written book comes out differently than you even imagined it would. At the other end of the spectrum are people who are saying they have too much. They have too much, they don't know where to focus, and while they're talking about all of the things that could be in it there's. I'll take notes. Here's your first draft. These things that you said are not in this one.

Amy: 13:59

Yeah.

Lauri: 14:00

This was the through line of what you just said, right. Yeah, this was the through line of what you just said, right. What words of advice do you have for people just finding their voice, and that might be speaking finding their voice or writing, finding their voice or both.

Amy: 14:19

I think it would be there. There would be three things. One you want to and we did this at the top of before we started recording we set an intention, not just what you want to say. What do you want the person, people that you're speaking to, the people that you're writing to, what do you want them to experience? And maintain that intention. Keep that in mind. It's about service. Actually, tomorrow I'm in the recovery community and I'm going to go share my story for the first time, and I'm probably more nervous about that than I am about a business talk, because one I'm talking about myself, but it's service. I'm there to share my experience, strength and hope, and so I'm like, well, I hope I can do that Right, I hope that someone is encouraged, um, so I'd say it's about setting that intention, um, and, and having an idea, even if that's not the way that things go. Having an idea of what you want the reader or the listener to experience and then letting that organically develop.

Lauri: 15:29

What do you hope they experience when you speak to the recovery community?

Amy: 15:36

Yeah, that's really about. It's about encouragement. Encouragement to stay sober, to continue one day at a time, to press into the 12 steps, to press into community, to press into the fellowship, to service all the things that we learn along the way and try to teach new people. But really it comes down to that one day at a time.

Amy: 16:02

It literally, is you got today? That's all you got? Yeah, and so my few, one days at a time, I hope, will show you that there is experience, strength and hope to be gained as you press into the recovery.

Lauri: 16:21

Yeah, it feels like what you said at the beginning about relating. You know, when you were preaching, finding a way to relate it to people in the room. That's. That's there in the talk, the service talk that you're getting in the recovery community tomorrow.

Amy: 16:41

Yeah.

Lauri: 16:42

Tomorrow.

Amy: 16:43

Tomorrow yeah.

Lauri: 16:48

Yeah, and part of the point of relating it to them when you're preaching is so that it's real, to take it out of the book and into their lives. So, it feels like there's things have kind of come full circle in some way, because that thread of really making it real for people in the room and being of service to the people in the room has been there the whole time and is showing up in both of those environments.

Amy: 17:15

Yeah, yeah, yeah, and really not making it, even though I'm talking about me, not making it about me, even though I'm talking about me, not making it about me. That is the best advice that I've gotten, which is yes, you're talking about your favorite subject, which is me which I would argue is not my favorite subject, theology is but making sure that you're there for the people rather than there for yourself. So I try to carry that through wherever I'm speaking, and it's about. The other thing I would say is intention, being present. Again, if you're so focused on what you're saying and if you're saying it right, like my, perfectionist tendencies will definitely rear their ugly heads. But if you're focused on what you're saying and making eye contact and being present with the people in the room, regardless of what you say, that's what people will remember. Is your authenticity to be with them rather than to stand up there and deliver the best speech you you know in the history of time.

Lauri: 18:28

Yeah, If the inner critics are driving and going for perfection, it actually will not be nearly as good, it will not serve the people in the room nearly as much as if focus is on the intention and is on service and then, like you said, you're connected and you're listening to their half of the conversation. And it's different than if you're sitting down with one-on-one with someone that you're sponsoring or one-on-one with someone that you're coaching. If it's a different environment, the conversation is different. And yet when we shift to seeing it as a conversation, it really touches people in a very, very different way and they can feel seen. When you're on stage talking about you, yep, but you're on stage talking about you for the sake of them.

Lauri: 19:29

Yeah, I did a marketing program where they would say you know, when you're talking about yourself, whether it's writing a marketing post, you are being of service, you're doing your teaching, you're living what you're here to do and it's like you're their Yoda. You're telling the story, thinking that you're Luke Skywalker, but what you actually are is you are their Yoda and they're putting themselves in your shoes the whole time, hearing what you've been through and thinking maybe it is possible for me. Right, maybe it is possible for me.

Amy: 20:09

Yeah, I carry that through. I carry that through in my business talks too, and I think people, like you said, they think of themselves as the main character, as Luke Skywalker in their story of themselves, as the main character, as Luke Skywalker in their story. But when you're presenting something written or spoken, actually the person you're presenting to is the main character, and so you're just there as the guide. You're just there, and so that leads me to the third thing is you've got to have some fun. Do not take yourself so seriously. Oh my gosh, like there is. Nothing more difficult for me as a professional speaker is to like my heart just goes out to somebody who is just so locked up and or so, um, so and you find this so much in the church, where they're just raging against the machine. They've got a point and they are just driving it home. Just soften it a little bit. Have some fun. Just make it something that people will remember. Whether they specifically remember everything you said or not, they will remember you and they'll remember what they need to.

Lauri: 21:22

Yeah, yeah, and I don't know about the people you've seen. I know that I have been the person who's so intense and driving at home when my passion for something got mixed together with the inner critic being in charge and a part of me that was worried that I wasn't enough.

Lauri: 21:43

So like you, said, at one point, my attention was on me and I'm very passionate about this topic, yet the part of me that doesn't think I'm enough is actually in charge. So it's that moment of like I'm speaking and I'm pushing and I'm driving it home because I think it's really important. Yeah, and Somebody might have even said this to me at some point. Who are you trying to convince you, or them? Yeah, rather than I do believe in this thing.

Amy: 22:14

Yeah.

Lauri: 22:15

And I'm going to set an intention for what I want you to experience and then lean into that conversation away. It can also be really tempting to, when we're doing serious stuff, serious important things that we are devoted to, to forget that life is a journey with a lot of twists and turns, and to be in the human experience while we're doing it.

Amy: 22:46

Absolutely. And humans make mistakes and humans forget to. I cannot tell you how many times this has happened to me. Forget to bring water with them and you get that little tickle in your throat that you can't you think one little will do it, and then you end up having a total coughing meltdown, hacking fit. It's happened so much I now remember. It's happened enough. I now remember to bring water with me.

Lauri: 23:10

But well, you gotta learn some, you know you gotta learn. Somehow you could have stopped. It's because of that, instead of treating it as a learning experience. Yeah, oh, next time I will bring water as opposed to oh. I keep having these coughing fits. I guess I'm not meant to be a speaker right?

Amy: 23:29

no, you're talking a lot, your mouth lot, and your mouth gets dry, your throat gets dry. It's just, you're human and you know those. Those moments that happened to me actually made the audience engage and lean in a little more. They were having a connectional moment. Those, those are the things that make you you and those are the things that make you you and those are the things that make people lean in, and that's super important you want the lean in yeah, you want the lean in they.

Lauri: 23:59

They can relate to you when you have a coughing fit, and I know this is true in theater. So when I was a young actor, before I really started directing, we always have this impression that someone that we're auditioning for is against us. Right, right, and speakers can have this feeling that the audience is against us because the nervous system is dealing with it. In reality, the opposite is true. When you're going into audition for a play, every time the door opens, that director is thinking please, let this be the one, please let this be the one, please let they're rooting for you, because there's a way that they're rooting for themselves and rooting for you right in audiences. People gave their time to go listen to you, so they are rooting for you from the moment you start and in live speaking and live theater.

Lauri: 25:04

Everybody loves the moments where something is weird. Everybody loves the moments where something is weird. I still remember a moment from when I was 19 years old, seeing a play at my college and being there for the day when they did something in the fight scene wrong. You know, they did the wrong moves at the wrong time and the shield hit someone's mouth and their tooth went flying across the stage. Yeah, mouth and their tooth went flying across the stage. And I remember being there when the staircase in the musical Evita, like the curtain and the staircase latching, moved at the wrong time and this curtain behind the staircase ripped in front of my eye. It wasn't like, oh, how dare you. I want my money back. Right, it was, I got to be there that day right and it's part of what makes it so vibrant and alive.

Lauri: 25:57

When people are pre-programmed and doing it perfect, like you said earlier, we can feel that they know exactly what's happening next absolutely. Whereas when there's a little of I don't know what I'm going to say next exactly, or the dog just crawled across me, Right it has a vibrance and an aliveness. If people are falling in love with you and want to know, and they're driving their cars and they want to know how they can connect with you and get to know you more outside of podcasts, what's the best way for them to do that?

Amy: 26:35

Yeah, the two easiest ways are really my website, so it's pretty simple wwwAmyWVogelcom, and then my social medias, particularly on Instagram and TikTok. Instagram is AWVogel it's the one outlier because it was my personal account for a long, long time and then TikTok is amywvogelcom and both of those. You'll get a glimpse not only of who I am as a person, but just really what I do and what my books are about you know just really what I do and what my books are about?

Lauri: 27:15

Fantastic, and before we go into our Pivo, pivot, do you have?

Amy: 27:17

any final words for people listening Be you, just be you. That is what people signed up to see.

Lauri: 27:25

Beautiful. Thank you. All right, Pivo Pivot. Do your best to blurt answers in one word or a short phrase. I'll try.

Amy: 27:42

What is your favorite word?

Lauri: 27:48

Mama.

Amy: 27:52

What is your least favorite word? Oh gosh, so many Prevaricate.

Lauri: 28:00

And what does prevaricate mean?

Amy: 28:02

It means to lie, and I only know that because my mom does crosswords. So thanks, mom. If you're listening, you're probably not Thank you what turns you on creatively, spiritually or emotionally? Womb work, especially dancing. So embodiment, womb work where I'm moving.

Lauri: 28:27

So yeah, dancing Awesome. What turns you off?

Amy: 28:32

Administrative tasks administration.

Lauri: 28:36

Yeah, what is your favorite curse word? Oh fuck.

Amy: 28:51

What sound or noise do you love?

Lauri: 28:55

Baby laughs. What sound or noise do you hate?

Amy: 29:00

This is easy Anything repetitive, anything that just goes over, including my children singing.

Lauri: 29:08

It drives me insane.

Amy: 29:17

What profession, other than the ones you have already tried, would be fun to try? Marine biologist.

Lauri: 29:23

That's what I wanted to be when I grew up, when I was little.

Amy: 29:26

What profession would you not like to do? Oh, accountant. Yeah, terrible at math, terrible at spreadsheets.

Lauri: 29:37

What do you hope people say about you on your 100th birthday?

Amy: 29:42

Oh gosh, that I always saw them and loved them for exactly who they were.

Lauri: 29:53

Beautiful. Well, thank you for letting us see you and love you for exactly who you are. It's been a pleasure.

Amy: 30:02

Yes, thank you, it has.