Good Girl to Wild Woman: The First Spark (bonus)

The spark that began my Good Girl to Wild Woman journey — from a childhood garage spotlight to the moment I realized I was keeping myself small.

Before Season 2 officially begins, Lauri shares the story that sparked a powerful new chapter in her life and work. Originally told in her Soul of Visibility Playshop, this is the first glimpse of her Good Girl to Wild Woman journey — from a childhood garage spotlight to Silicon Valley masks, to the acting class moment that melted decades of protection.

Key Takeaways:

1. Early experiences shape the masks we wear — and the ways we learn to be seen or hide.
2. Choosing environments that honor our sensitivity helps us thrive.
3. Sometimes the loudest wake-up call comes from within: “Don’t you know I’m meant for greater things?”
4. Breakthroughs sometimes feel like a period of melting away, not a single instant of change.
5. True visibility isn’t about grasping for attention — it’s about letting our one-in-eight-billion radiance shine.

Transcript

Soul purpose, childhood play and the garage spotlight at 7

Speaker 1 0:00

It all started when I was born , really actually like as a soul , before I was even born , and I think I came here as a soul with things to do in this lifetime . And then my conscious memories around my journey begin at around seven years old , when I was playing the Brady Bunch in the backyard and my mom opened the door and found me there talking to myself . My friends , you know , we were making up a story and I was in it like imagining , expressing , being fully myself , and my friends did not grow up to be actors . And my friends did not grow up to be actors and they were like yeah , I'm done with the story thing , I'm going swimming . And when that light flooded in , when the garage door opened it's clear now that it was like my first spotlight and she could have said oh my God , what are you doing ? Stop doing that . She could have said , oh my God , what are you doing ? Stop doing that

The light and the shadow: Theater as a spiritual zone

Speaker 1 1:28

. That's what a lot of the world does and did to me later in , like high school and 20s . And it wasn't even until my 30s that I realized , oh my God , I'm being who I think other people want or need me to be , and they don't even want or need that anymore .

Speaker 1 1:34

And instead of doing that , my mom took me to an acting class , and theater has a light side and a shadow . The shadow is the part that you see in movies like the understudy , where it's cutthroat and there's power plays and ego and competition , and I am now grateful that there's both sides to the theater so that I , when I look back on my life in particular , was consciously surrounding myself with the people that were embodying more of the light side fellow weirdos , sensitive souls . Um , misfit toys was like one of my very first clients . We used to talk about being from the land of misfit toys and it was really my first spiritual zone that had the place where I first felt what it meant , beyond that childhood , to be truly , deeply alive and present . It was also a spiritual zone because it had both the light side and the dark side the whole time . I talk a lot about the light side because I've been consciously choosing that and going toward it ,

Silicon Valley masks & living a split life

Speaker 1 2:47

consciously choosing that and going toward it , and 20 years later , I was working in the middle of the most masked up , least visible , one of the most masked up , least visible places in the world the Silicon Valley doing theater at night and I , as I you know , from 27 toward like 30 , I started to realize I'm living this split life . It's like I've got this mask on during the day and I'm getting older and I'm not going to be able to do this 55 hours a week , plus 45 hours of theater or more , every single week . And around that point somebody asked me to fax something after a show ended and a voice inside of me screamed don't you know ? I'm meant for greater things . I knew that I was meant for greater things and I also realized in that moment that that person who asked me to fax something was not the one keeping me small .

The “I’m fine” mask and the acting class breakthrough

Speaker 1 3:53

I was keeping myself small .

Speaker 1 3:54

And then , shortly after that , a moment came in my favorite acting class . That is a pivotal moment that has its roots in everything I do . I was doing an exercise in an acting class and on this day I was up on stage all by myself and other classmates were like chiming things in from the audience and I kept putting on the I'm fine mask . I've got it all pulled together . I'm so capable , I'm not a weirdo , I'm not overly emotional . And he stopped the exercise and said whatever you're doing with that , stop doing it . And I said I'm not that comfortable having everyone's eyes on me .

Speaker 1 4:36

And then he took off his glasses , which usually made me go oh fuck , what's coming next ? And he just calmly said then you've picked a strange set of careers for yourself .

“Part of you knows you’re meant to be seen.”

Speaker 1 4:49

Part of you wants this . Part of you knows you're meant to be seen . And it was like he was speaking through the years , to and through , like all of my own masks and veils and smoke screens and static . To the part of me that was dancing in the garage light at seven years old . To the part of me that knew I was here to do something as a soul before I even came here . And you know , I'd love to say , like something cracked open , if you read this story when I put it in writing and I have less space for words , that is true , and it's also because I chose to trust him and it felt more like a melting of decades of protection than like a now it's all done and really it feels like the melting continues . There are still times where I realize , oh , I think I just caught like a thin veil .

Being seen in every corner

Speaker 1 5:59

Being seen is something that happens in every corner of our lives . We're going to focus on speaking . It's a very ripe ground and I will say that I am far more comfortable at times being on a stage fully unmasked than being in an intimate moment in my life when it gets hot and intense . When it gets hot and intense , that's when I'm currently feeling like the good girl comes up and wants to like make it all smooth again , and then the inner teenager comes up and like fuck you , I will do things to get you away from me or to try to protect myself by like launching bombs back .

Speaker 1 6:39

When we work on it , with this stage metaphor , it will ripple through every corner of our lives and if it comes up in your life , it will also ripple back and have an impact on the stage , because it's like working a muscle in different sports you get stronger at being seen .

Melting the armor, full presence

Speaker 1 7:02

And when I let things start to melt and I jumped back into the exercise , by the time it was over it was like there were no veils and I could see and feel the truth of all of the people in the room , like what kind of day they were having . And that was my first moment of oneness that lasted beyond the acting , beyond being in a sport together , and why I say it's now . It's like the heart and the root of everything that I do is because when we allow ourselves to truly be seen and we share ourselves and receive others , our one in eight billion radiance shines through and also gives others the permission to do that too .