I'm prepping for Palm Springs Pride and I'm trying to lose five pounds. Okay, what should I do?
Speaker 2:I have some ventramine what's that? That's a weight loss supplement. It's like Adderall, but not. It makes you not eat.
Speaker 1:You already have Adderall.
Speaker 2:I know, but it takes away your appetite, but it doesn't necessarily mentally get you.
Speaker 1:So you're saying I should take some of your fentramine.
Speaker 2:Fentermine. That's what I said. Yeah, I got it from Mexico.
Speaker 1:Oh, okay.
Speaker 2:I don't know if that's allowed to be on the internet. Yeah, probably.
Speaker 1:What's a healthier way to do it Like because? I still want to eat. What I've been doing is just eating trail mix.
Speaker 2:Like a fucking.
Speaker 1:I just feel like that's all I've been eating your gerbil Trail mix and peanut butter pretzels Probably.
Speaker 2:Maybe like lettuce wraps you have that lettuce up yonder.
Speaker 1:Okay, I love how you're coming to me for healthy eating advice. I also like need to get my like bowels on the regular, you know.
Speaker 2:You ever feel like really bloated. You're just like. I know there's poo in there.
Speaker 1:Girl. I thought that I needed some probiotics. Yeah, because I was like you know what that's gonna help like, regulate everything and get me like nice and like cycled up for palm springs. So I got this huge jar of gummies from costco gummy ones just don't do it, you're supposed to take two a day when they're, like you know, full of probiotics.
Speaker 1:So just make you like regular and less bloated and all the good things. So I started taking them immediately. I've been having the worst gas of my entire life. That's what they do like. I literally wake up in the middle of the night because I fart and it smells so bad. I'm like what? I'm like trying to only eat nuts and berries right now, so I know it's not what I'm putting into my body. And then I like finally made the connection.
Speaker 2:It's definitely um the probiotics well, is there a thing that, like you're kind of almost like we talked about with acne, how they all the bad shit comes to the top of the skin is like all like the gassy shit just getting out of your body okay that's what I thought too, and I was like I'm gonna keep like taking it for like a couple weeks and make sure that like it's not just uh, whatever that's called purging. You know you're purging so I did.
Speaker 1:no, it just continued for like at least a week and a half. And then, when I was in um walla walla this past weekend, I was sleeping in a house with a bunch of gay guys and I was like a last addition to the house. So I was sleeping on a fold out couch pull out couch in the living room and I was like I can't be that gassy all night long because someone's going to wake up for breakfast and they're going to be like Kyle. Why does it smell like a dead corpse in here?
Speaker 2:Who do you think out of the group has the worst farts other than you on the trip?
Speaker 1:Who do you think would?
Speaker 2:stink the worst. Loki I think it might be John.
Speaker 1:Okay, what are we going to talk about with today's episode?
Speaker 2:Well, first off.
Speaker 1:I feel like you just got back from austin city limits right yeah okay, you got back from austin city limits and I was gone for like 10 days. Yeah, we haven't seen each other for a while, so we got a lot to catch up on and I want to start with a hard-hitting question for me okay did you miss me, though still, this is the longest we've gone without seeing or talking to each other since we moved in you know what?
Speaker 1:you did it no, uh, they say distance makes the heart grow fonder, and I believe that that's true. What? Yes, I could see that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was like you know, I really, I really needed to miss you I just want the fans to know that I was thinking about actually I was mostly just thinking about you and how appreciative you'd be. I took notes every day, wow of this trip but, basically, I have been saving a lot of these stories for this recording. I got back sunday night. You picked me up, um, and I wanted we needed to tie it into a topic, yeah, and so it came to fruition talking about friendships back home um navigating friendships navigating friendships.
Speaker 1:So basically, what came to mind for me as a topic was how do relationships evolve over time? And like when you go back home after being I don't know leaving for college, you come back home and like friendship dynamics have changed and people grow apart, or that go grow together. Um, and you know, people come into your life. For what is it? They?
Speaker 1:say a season or a reason, or a lifetime or something like that, and I feel like when you have taken time away from home and you you go back, you get to kind of like re-, reevaluate, like what those friendships look like now and it sounds like maybe you had some of those experiences when you were back home.
Speaker 2:I did.
Speaker 1:In addition to like yeah, going to Austin city limits and having a giggle time, yes, First off, the men in Austin.
Speaker 2:The men in Austin they need to study it, because I've never been in a city with that many attractive humans. Have you been to Chicago?
Speaker 1:No, I feel like maybe are boys from Chicago moving to Austin. I don't know.
Speaker 2:Did you read an article? The hottest guys in the world.
Speaker 1:Well, not world, but hottest guys in America, I think, live in Chicago.
Speaker 2:Really they're so hot, are they mentally well?
Speaker 1:Yeah, because it snows and stuff there. I know that's where they're moving. Austin, that's my guess. That's my hot take okay but also like there's lots of hot guys in, like dallas, you know, and I feel like there's just like hot texas guys and you know my kink is homophobia. So right, yeah, and especially internalized truly take it out on me, yeah and so.
Speaker 2:But the men there were hot, hot. But before we get going I noticed that this this morning I still have this tan line from that shirt oh yeah, you were wearing a mesh shirt and you got like sunburned, so yes, one of the days fishnet tan.
Speaker 1:yes, okay, so, yes, okay. So tell me about ACL.
Speaker 2:Okay, I wanted to go chronologically Okay. So Thursday I leave here. Thursday land in Austin, get there. Like an hour or two after my friends get there we go to dinner with one of their aunts or uncles that moved there. It was fine. I was overstimulated as fuck, exhausted, time change, miserable. But that was fine. We went around like the campus and of course you know I was on the grid because the boys in college there too, just jesus, take the wheel oh.
Speaker 1:University of texas at austin. Yeah, is that the only one uh, good, cute, cute.
Speaker 2:Okay, um, I'm not an alumni, but alumnus, but an alumnus was in you at some point over the weekend yes, okay, okay so go, longhorns, yeah, that's their, yeah, that's theirs, yeah, um, so I was dancing with this big guy. So we go to dinner, we go, and then we go out that that first night. And I'm like, yeah, we go to dinner and then we go out that first night.
Speaker 2:And I'm like yeah, we go to the club. I don't even remember what the name of it was. Oh, it was called Rain, and this big man picked me up and would not put me down, Like of course I was drunk. I started like getting teary eyed. I was like, please just leave me the fuck alone. That's how I envision it.
Speaker 1:Probably way this how I envision.
Speaker 2:It are probably way more dramatic. But then I have a screenshot of a text message. Why didn't?
Speaker 1:you punch him in the throat. He's a very big man that's your go-to move.
Speaker 2:Have I ever punched someone in the throat?
Speaker 1:no, well, you have said it on um record that if someone is jamming it in your ass too fast, you punch them in the throat or if they try to shame you for shitting on their dick. You punch them in the throat.
Speaker 2:That's a direct quote.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's a direct quote, so I want to see you put that in action if someone's going to harass you. Don't encourage it. Yeah, because you know I would Fair and I would do it for you too.
Speaker 2:Fair, you've almost done it up and you've been like, no, put me down, don't drop me, don't drop me. My issue is is I?
Speaker 1:can run my mouth, but I probably can't fight.
Speaker 2:I'm gonna teach you some jabs and some punches actually I think I could see red and like, like, just go angry what would it take you to get there?
Speaker 1:I?
Speaker 2:don't know, all right we'll see. I'm gonna teach you um, so then I was making out with a guy, apparently, that we all go home Next day, so I had texted. I apparently had gotten his number. I had texted him, caleb, with a K. His response Okay. Next message I speak Spanish but I will use translator to talk to you.
Speaker 1:Last message I want your ass, which you could totally tell he used a translator. He speaks spanish, yeah. So he wrote I want your ass into google translate.
Speaker 2:And then it spit out that you could tell, because there's like a space underneath it. Oh my gosh, yo quiero to us so then we're at the festival that whenever I get this text message and I was like I could, could not remember what he looked like. He sent me a photo, did not respond, wait wait, wait no. And then he invited me. Then he invited me to like this Halloween party. Is that a coyote?
Speaker 1:ugly Isn't that what that's called? Where you'd rather chew your arm?
Speaker 2:off Good quote.
Speaker 1:Yes, bitch yeah.
Speaker 2:And I was just like my god and then?
Speaker 1:so then I didn't respond. And then, what was his name?
Speaker 2:I couldn't tell you oh, you didn't save it. No, I just didn't have my name at 2 11 am. Okay, I mean, he responded the next day, um, but he wasn't cute. And then he was glad you didn't go home with him well, yeah, thankfully that man picked me up, made me cry, and I was just over a minute at that point okay, got it so that's thursday.
Speaker 2:So then friday's like first day festival. We get there like maybe two o'clock because I mainly went to this festival just for a few key artists and I wasn't blowing my load too early. I've never gone to a three-day festival. I don't know how people do it. It's like a fucking marathon. It really is um. I saw katie pruitt. She was good, don't know how you say.
Speaker 1:You didn't blow your load too early and it's a marathon, not a sprint, but you were blackout, being lifted into the air by a big guy, and text message from someone who doesn't speak english on the first night and you don't remember his name, that is, uh, literally a sprint, not a marathon. So just want to make sure you're living, like you know, in the delusion and I want to make sure you realize that.
Speaker 2:But if I kept telling myself that this is a slow pace, I knew I could get through it. It's like when you're hiking, you're like, okay, I'm halfway done, I'm half of a halfway done, like, yeah, that's how my mind is. Yeah.
Speaker 1:I'm, like day one, a quarter way done. I can do this, I can relate, I know what you mean.
Speaker 2:I got to see Dasha. She sings the song Austin, do your thing, did your truck break?
Speaker 1:down. Oh, I love that song.
Speaker 2:She's like Gretchen Wilson mixed with Renee Rapp or someone like this. Like 90s women kind of embrace their real country aesthetic.
Speaker 1:I definitely get that vibe from her.
Speaker 2:All the videos I've seen of her, she could not sing Worth a Lick and she was good Really. Good, shockingly and there was this group of very hot men overall, she like the like the highlight of of a friday um no, but the probably the highlight of the day was chris stapleton. He was like the main closer for the first night, yeah, and solid. He brought out willie nelson oh shit okay yes, and how is willie doing? Oh, not well, no, was he?
Speaker 2:like smoking some gong I couldn't tell, but he could barely move around that stage and he was standing. No, they sat him down, oh and okay I think he was ushered out there by some nurses or something I couldn't tell, but like he was hooked up, he looked frail, okay, really frail, and you know I work in hospice, kind of like how you look after the previous night?
Speaker 1:yeah, we're looking the same.
Speaker 2:I'm like in a wheelchair me, him, or making eye contact. I'm like you're seeing. Your heard your felt.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I understand you, I'm a nurse, I get it, it's like do you need your morphine dose?
Speaker 2:because baby? He looked like he was like one of my patients, but if not worse. Oh wow, couldn't even hear him couldn't even play.
Speaker 1:he's not graduating from hospice. No, okay, you're getting held back a year. Girl. Yeah, you're staying on service.
Speaker 2:Okay, but that night I hooked up with this man.
Speaker 1:Oh, beefy, yeah, Okay.
Speaker 2:Let me describe him.
Speaker 1:He's got like really big biceps, good chest, friendly face. He looks kind of like a Texan, yeah, like a little bit of like a daddy vibes going on, yeah, but like young fit daddy, but like picture that, but someone who's insecure about their age, because there's like this, like Energizer bunny, that. I don't know. Does that make sense? Like he's trying to appear younger than he actually is, yeah, but like I don't want, I'm a cool dad.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I don't want you to be that. I'm a cool zaddy Because I was, he kept like moving me around so fast and swiftly.
Speaker 1:What do you mean During sex?
Speaker 2:Yeah, he's like, let's make out.
Speaker 1:Turn around, suck, suck my dick, let me eat your ass. And then, like, just moving, like, like not even a full minute had gone by. Oh well, he was probably on like a bunch of cocaine, no, are you?
Speaker 2:sure, I looked at his eyes so he has more add than you. Yeah, wow, and then that's a lot, as after we're finishing he's telling me. He's like oh yeah, just be quiet on the way out. I don't want. I was like I didn't know that you had people here, because I was decently loud, probably For the six minutes that it lasted. Yeah, if that yeah, imagine me getting two Ubers. What do you mean?
Speaker 1:Like I Ubered there and then Ubered back.
Speaker 2:And then, like you know, like the awkward moment where, like I'm waiting outside because I just had ordered the Uber, girl.
Speaker 1:It's like one of my worst. My least favorite things is waiting for the uber after hookup. It's like worse than the walk of shame.
Speaker 2:Um, so then I go back home whatevs? Clay's not there. He goes to hook up with someone one of my friends this is one of your friends that you went to yeah, clay and chris and he comes back the next morning and he calms in bed uh, because there's three of us, two beds, he. So he gets in my bed and then he wakes up and he's like whose phone is this? And I was like I don't fucking know when did you get that phone? And he's like I think it was a guy I hooked up with and I was like you stole his phone. And he was like I didn't mean to it, just hit my pants.
Speaker 1:And I'm like what do you mean? One time time I was in vegas and I was making out with this hot guy at this gay bar did he speak english?
Speaker 1:yes, okay and he was like, do you want to go up to my room? And he was like it lit or he was staying in the same building as the club. So I told all my friends I was going upstairs with this guy. Okay, I didn't even think he was that drunk. But we get upstairs and we start making out. I'm on top of him and he passed out while I'm making out with him, like started snoring just like. And I was so mad because I was like I literally just left all my friends and a fun dance club to come up here and fuck you and you passed out. So what did I do? I I took $100 out of his wallet and went back downstairs and bought all my friends drinks.
Speaker 2:Hey guys sorry, I was just trying to get us free drinks.
Speaker 1:I was like you know what? That is fucked up. That is fucked up.
Speaker 2:I know, but you should not admit to thievery. Okay, well, I did so, it's fine. So Sunday was probably my favorite day. After this, we'll get to more of like friendship talk. I just have to like get all this out.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so the main reason why I went to this, festival is Jess Glenn and Renee Rapp.
Speaker 2:Jess Glenn, I cried the entire performance.
Speaker 1:When you said you cried so much, I figured it was going to be at Jess Glenn.
Speaker 2:Because she I think I've told you you I cry when I laugh is my favorite album, probably of all times. Yes, yeah, for backwards, I know every song on the album and hearing it live, so good, so, so good and she looked phenomenal. She doesn't, she's not a dancer, she's just gonna go up there and sing with her fucking vote.
Speaker 1:Oh, yeah, she's a vocalist yeah, and it's just she's saying all my faves, that's enough.
Speaker 2:She's saying all my faves. Um, I got front row to queen herbie because everyone went to chaparone and I avoided it like the plague, just because I knew I would. We could hear it all the way on the other side of the fucking festival grounds.
Speaker 1:Yeah, insane, she broke records both weekends Right. That's wild.
Speaker 2:And I think her outfit alluded to us wearing a strap-on.
Speaker 1:Ooh, I love that. Yeah, kinky. Anyway, that's a tangent yeah.
Speaker 2:And, of course, as I would, as I love to do Made out with a hot-ass man, hot.
Speaker 1:Okay, do you have pictures of him?
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:Does he speak English? I couldn't tell you. Does it feel like Spanish? Couldn't tell you. No.
Speaker 2:Okay, I don't know, but I know what you're talking about. Some tongues are rougher than others.
Speaker 1:I was talking more about the motion that it makes the motion of the ocean.
Speaker 2:Was he rolling his R's yeah?
Speaker 1:it makes like the motion of the ocean. Was he rolling?
Speaker 2:his r's yeah or no? No, I don't, couldn't tell you. Okay, couldn't tell you. I was making eye contact with the gogo boy, though. Oh, he's definitely straight.
Speaker 1:But while you're making out with yeah, he was giving me eyes.
Speaker 2:Okay, actually, I do know who this guy is and he's not near as hot. He added me on instagram the guy you're making out with yeah, that's sad okay so it wasn't that hot no, I just made this lie up I guess, okay, so this is where it gets fun and juicy okay so clay beats chris and I back to the hotel and while we are out, he is making out with this other guy and clay clay is yeah he's making out with this other guy and we are friends that are going to support whatever we're like.
Speaker 2:You're into it? Cool, great. So they go back. Chris and I, I think, get food, and that's why we're oh yeah, because I'm standing there eating a hot dog on the side of it. Oh, so good.
Speaker 1:So Clay is off to the hotel with the guy he's making out with. You and Chris are getting some street meat.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and so then we come. Then I'm like, oh, they're not back yet, so I go to go into the bathroom. Oh, they're getting out of the shower. They're naked. I'm like, oh, close the door. I'm like, chris, we're gonna have a picnic outside. Okay, it's 3 am, uh-huh, so we're eating outside to let Clay get fucked okay, like good friends would do. And then I'm on the on the grid, and then I'm like Chris, at three o'clock in the morning. Catch you later yep, um, I get there. Fucking.
Speaker 1:Stops responding no and I'm like, I'm like hey, I'm here, I can't.
Speaker 2:No, I uber okay I'm like, hey, I can't find like it was like a weird complex. It's like I can't find your apartment number. So, and then no response, and then I'm still just walking around. When I tell you like so, then like I. Finally I was like oh, there it is. His bedroom window is like right next to the front door. Lights on, I could. It sounds creepy, but you could see in there, like I was intentionally trying to pass the fuck out no um, so anyway, that's not even.
Speaker 2:that's not even the end of the story. Okay, so then I get back after being so fucking embarrassed. I'm walking in it's like 4.30 at the 4 am, 4.15. And Clay is like dry, heaving in the bed and I'm like waking. I'm like shaking him to wake him up. I'm like get your ass up. You're going to throw up, let's go throw up. Meanwhile, the guy he ended up not even fucking, so they didn't have sex. We sat outside for no fucking reason. He's in the bed next to him.
Speaker 1:They just took a shower together Apparently. Then he was like guys, I gave you eyes, I wasn't into it.
Speaker 2:I'm like. You didn't give us any eyes. You refused to look at us.
Speaker 1:No, no, no, no, no, no. That's not your problem, right no?
Speaker 2:Don't blame, throw up, I'm fine. He throws water on his face, he gets back in my bed with chris, my friend, and he would not move. So guess who had to sleep in the bed with the stranger? Me, you, and he sweats the stranger. Yes, I would have gotten the bathtub no, oh, it was kind of a dank hotel because it was kind of like.
Speaker 1:It was like we could walk to an airbnb. No, no, because we could walk to. I thought you guys got an Airbnb.
Speaker 2:No, no, because we could walk to the festival, but like Time is fucked up.
Speaker 1:Clay. Okay, we're calling you out, clay no but it's got.
Speaker 2:But this is what I appreciate about the, because, like I'm like, okay, slay.
Speaker 1:All right, that's nicer than I would be, that's fine. Good morning I took morning. I took a hundred dollars.
Speaker 2:Good morning starshine. How are? We yeah the sun's out, get, yeah, you need to leave so I can go to bed, yeah, and so then we wait miserable. We have to get on a fucking plane.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, barely got any sleep so in a knoxville, everyone, all three of you, are going back to knoxville yeah, all all in the same plane.
Speaker 2:Okay, ultimately, I went home for my brother's wedding is why I went home, and then it just coincided.
Speaker 2:I forgot that it was for your brother yeah, my younger brother's wedding okay he's getting married to a woman yeah, okay, I'm the only guy in the family okay, her name is taylor and they've been together for good question how long? I don't know okay, a few years, at least you knew her name. That's good. A few years, yeah, a few years. At least you knew her name, that's good. A few years, yeah, a few years. But what's so interesting and fun to think about?
Speaker 1:is it was like a honky tonk kind of wedding.
Speaker 2:No, no, no, formal white dress yeah.
Speaker 1:Black suit.
Speaker 2:Yeah, they do have honky tonk.
Speaker 1:I've gone to honky tonk weddings like they're wearing jeans yeah, and like tennessee.
Speaker 2:Vol colors yeah, like orange and white, yeah. Um, how many people were there? Oh, probably like 100. Oh, my god, the t while we were at the wedding. So there was like a parking lot and then there was like people had to park on the other side of the fence near the highway. Someone had came and broken just so many cars and stole their pocketbooks and phones broken what At the wedding yeah? It's a loose term, because all the cars were unlocked. And I learned in Seattle, baby, you don't leave anything in sight.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you're still dealing with insurance problems because of your brain change.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I shouldn't give anyone advice and me over here judging people. How could you do that? Meanwhile, they didn't have four busted windows.
Speaker 1:You know, if you had not locked your car, you wouldn't have had so many broken windows.
Speaker 2:I did stop locking it when I lived in the city because of those. It just took me a long time to figure it out In.
Speaker 1:San Francisco. That's what they do. People write notes saying it's unlocked, take anything you want, because they'd rather not have their car broken into.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but here they don't even steal anything. They do it. Yeah, piss me off, yeah. And then like these two, like I'm going out to grab my vape, obviously, and these two girls are like we're like what are we gonna do? I'm like you should probably go tell someone like their cars were broken.
Speaker 1:Yeah, like windows are broken.
Speaker 2:No, like they they notice their phone in their wall who leaves? Their phone in their pocketbook in a car I don't know, that's weird um, so anyway, that's not the actual wedding part that I want to get to, because I do have something to say about a girl who I invited. Okay, um, my best friend. I've talked to you about her. I'm not going to say her name and read her for filth.
Speaker 1:Okay, so this is now Sunday. This is now Saturday. This is now Saturday, the wedding day. Okay.
Speaker 2:I offered to hang out with her Thursday. She said she couldn't because she had a lot of work. And then she texted me saturday morning saying she couldn't come to the wedding and she went. She was supposed to be your plus one yeah, and she was my plus one to my sister's wedding if she couldn't come, who would you have invited instead? No one because, like, she's like the kind of friend, like she enjoys like those types of moments and like and she's's like knows your family. She's met them multiple times.
Speaker 1:Yeah, she's met them on Facebook. Yeah, how long have you known her? How long have you been?
Speaker 2:Five years. When did you guys meet? Five years ago, mm-hmm.
Speaker 1:And and she's the one who's five years ago, so I was 21 when you were 21.
Speaker 2:Yeah okay, it's a big year for elmo yeah became a nurse got a friend who's really big. Um yeah, so I met her through playing softball. I got invited to go to the world series shortly after going and I go with my friends jamie and tony. She was their roommate. She was like who the fuck is this little twinkie boy coming with us?
Speaker 2:and then we fell in love okay and so did you bond over I don't know like we, just you're kicking kicking like, like we're besties, but like I think she's always wanted a child and like I kind of like it was kind of played into like the like wisdom, like not really mother, son, but kind of like that. Is she older than you? Yeah, oh, I forget, I have to say these things. Yeah, she's 50.
Speaker 1:She's much older than you. Okay, got it. I did not know that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and so she obviously gives a lot of life advice, wisdom, but she can outdrink the best of them. Again, the stories I could tell you about this woman fine, chaotic, um, but like we I was her mammals hospice nurse, like we've just gone through a lot together. Yeah, um, all of covid, we stayed together non-stop and I've talked to you about her before, about, remember. You were like what have you told her what you need? Um, so then she texted me that I just liked it, didn't respond because she was like yeah, she was like hey, I have a migraine.
Speaker 2:I'm probably. I'll let you know a little bit later if I'm gonna be able to come. I just liked it and I knew she wasn't coming, but she didn't tell me that until like 5pm like you, gave it a thumbs up and it really upset me because I am in town. I am in town, she's your plus one for the wedding. I'm in town. You already turned me down one night and then Saturday the wedding turned me down. So I was like really about her. But I finally called her today because we were recording this.
Speaker 1:So I called her on my way home.
Speaker 2:And I knew she felt bad, bad, but she chose not to acknowledge it and it kind of just let me yeah I did. I said I'm really sad I didn't get to see you when I was in town her statement was that migraine of mine?
Speaker 2:it lasted until this, and then she starts talking about all the things going on in her life, and this is why I wanted to talk about this whole navigating friendship thing yeah and we have the we I thought had the kind of friendship like and we still do, like where we could, you could pick it up and put it down, but like it doesn't really get picked up much anymore. I think there's a part, and I it almost turned into like journaling, because I really wanted to like think about how this experience was different, going home, than all the other ones. Because I remember let me put into perspective so when I first started travel nursing, I would go home and people were like, oh my god, we missed you and like everyone would want to like hang out. We'd, everyone would make such an effort, we'd go, do things and I would come home more frequently. And then I'd come home and feel kind of disconnected from everyone and people's effort decreased.
Speaker 2:And I took it personally a lot, even in April when I went home, even like in april when I went home, and I think this trip was different because I spent more time with my family than I did with friends. So a lot of my friends were at the world series for softball, um, and I just appreciated like getting to almost like come into their world and it's not my world anymore, you know like I'm coming in to your life, into your city and getting to experience how you've changed and grown and, like I'm not, still holding on to what our relationship was right you know, three years ago you're excited to see how it's changed, if anything and I didn't realize that until after I got back.
Speaker 2:Sorry, I didn't realize that until after I got back from the trip. And that's this is the premise of why the whole episode I wanted to share. I wanted to gossip, share the tea, but yeah, it's really tough to navigate that, especially because it's not conversations you want to have, as you're having those feelings Like, right oh, I'm not feeling connected to you when I'm coming in.
Speaker 1:I'm not doing like but if you're saying like that you're showing up with the hope that you get to experience people in a new way and that there's really no pressure to like show up and expect everything to be the same, then why are you feeling the way that you're feeling about your relationship with this friend not showing up in a way that you expected them to show up?
Speaker 2:That's a good question. I think that I'm allowing myself to. I'm I think in my brain I'm giving other people permission, but I'm still holding her to the same standard. Right, and that's not fair. But Something about that relationship, though, like it's really special because it reflects my mind and my mom's relationship. Yeah, because I went. I was told her that I learned that in therapy, uh-huh, but I don't know. It's a good question.
Speaker 1:I'll have to ponder that well, or you can just ask her and you said you talked to her and she didn't bring anything up, but you could be, you know, you can just ask her. Be like, hey, so is our relationship different? Because it felt like it was different when we, you know, when I was back home and I thought that we were going to be able to like reconnect, and I felt like we didn't, and that's upsetting for me, because I felt like we didn't and that's upsetting for me because I felt like we could step back into where we were, but like you know, is that how you feel is?
Speaker 1:is that how is that how you are perceiving things, or you know? Is there anything that you want to address or bring up, or are you ready to just move on?
Speaker 2:that's a good. I like that because, you know, I, whenever I like the way my brain works and the words I want to use, tend to be a little bit more pointed and aggressive, uh-huh. And so if I don't feel like I can speak as gracefully as I want, I just won't say it right, because I can come across kind of bitchy. Yeah, why the fuck didn't you see me bitch?
Speaker 1:Yeah, you know. My first thought is do you know this like weird fact that guys think about the Roman Empire like multiple times a day or something weird?
Speaker 2:like that yes.
Speaker 1:Supposedly. I mean like I'm a guy, I guess, but I'm non-binary so it doesn't really come up that much in my mind. So it doesn't really come up that much in my mind. Um, okay, but do you know what it is for girls like things that pop into their brain multiple times a day, like the roman empire does for guys?
Speaker 1:salty, sweet snacks no okay, it's their ex-best friend. Their ex-best friend pops into their head multiple times a day. That's so me, right I? That's why I'm bringing it up, like you. Like that is your Roman empire. This person is your fucking Roman empire. And I bring it up because, um, my best friend from high school. We were so close throughout high school, throughout college. She was like the first person to visit me at college, like during orientation. I would go visit her all the time in Santa Barbara while I was living in Malibu, and we would like fly back and forth to you know, back home, and we would talk on the phone every single day. And just two years ago, we took a trip to barcelona to go to a music festival for the cheetah girls, the cheetah girls, were not there.
Speaker 1:No, oh, but yes, we did go to barcelona and we did go to the Gaudi Park.
Speaker 2:Where they recorded the music video.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and some shit went down at the music festival. We have not talked since. I mean, I have apologized profusely, even though I don't really feel like I did anything wrong, because you like Dua Lipa, just say that, yeah, yeah, and she has said that she's accepted my apology, but she's also I've. I've reached out to her multiple times. She ignores everything and all of a sudden it's like we went from best friends for the last like decade plus to not talking at all, and I don't know, like what to do or how to act or how to feel about it honestly, but at the end of the day it just comes up like it pops into my brain all the time and what's her life like?
Speaker 2:and yeah, that's tough, though. No, because there is a morning that comes along with, yeah, like it's people that, like you're like inseparable, and then, like it's always, it seems like it's over something stupid, a lot of the times, right like reflecting back on it, but then it just like so much time passes that you're just like, oh, I can't give it the energy.
Speaker 1:Yeah, so what can you take from that story to apply to yours?
Speaker 2:honestly, it makes me reflect on like okay, I want. If you're not gonna match my energy, I'm like I'm also. No, that's probably the wrong answer, because part of me just wants to be like, okay, I'm just going to match your energy and slowly fade away. But that's not fair. Should I say something? Well, is it?
Speaker 1:worth it to you? Is it worth having that conversation over it?
Speaker 2:always just depends, because if it's a negative outcome, I think it's having that conversation, it's always. It always just depends, because if it's a negative outcome, I think it's going to make it worse and make my experience, though, then it's gonna make my experience. I'd much rather just like us naturally gravitate away than for me you're afraid of having a hard conversation not that, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah no.
Speaker 1:It's always better to have the conversation. It's always better to have the conversation than to not have that conversation and to think in your head for the next 100 years you know, until you die what it would have been like if you had had that conversation with your friend.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and she's the kind of person I've had tough conversations with, but, as our most recent duo guest said, the times you don't want to have a conversation are the times you should, and I thought I was going to do that today, but then, like I just got, I felt more hurt.
Speaker 1:I thought that that's where the story was going. I felt more hurt.
Speaker 2:That's where I felt more hurt whenever she tried to like, shift it away from like what I was trying to acknowledge and that in that moment I was like, oh, I'm not comfortable with discussing this as much as I thought I was right because I thought she'd be like, oh yeah, like that was really sucked, I'm sorry, didn't even acknowledge it, didn't even ask about it, didn't even did you get home, like she's like. But no, she did say I did track you because she has my location to make sure you get home safe and randomly she'll just like. When we were camping, she was like are you okay? You're in the middle of the woods.
Speaker 2:Like she checks on me Maybe she other fair, because we do come from different generations and like things.
Speaker 1:I think you need to tell her I did, but that was a couple years ago when I first moved here, so that's fair that's fair, but um I people can't show up for you unless you tell them how you need them to show up for you or you've told me the same exact thing about her too before.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and maybe it's it's my ear, you know I can't hear right so it just went in one ear, out the other. It's selective, but I another reflection thing that I was talking about that so correlates is I didn't see as many friends this time, um, but I spent more time with family and the friends I did see. I spent more time individually with them, like Clay and Chris.
Speaker 2:obviously I saw a lot and I felt more connected to everyone and, like I shared earlier, like I felt like I was coming into their world and it's almost like a quality over quantity yeah well, like a parent, like in their kid goes off to college and then they come back and they keep holding them to the same 18 year old that left to go to college right, like they want to put you in this box and like how I always complain, like everyone back home always kept putting me in this box and like for a long time I was mourning that everyone had changed so much but then this trip, not intentionally, like I only realized it reflecting on it.
Speaker 2:Everyone has changed so much and it's so wonderful to just get to be like a visitor in their world. Yeah, and you've changed too Right, and I knew that I had, but I never even let myself think that they had Right. And like my sister has her own family, like my brother has his own family, yeah, like my old brother also has family with kids, and like my parents are enjoying their life, and like all of these things are happening without me being the center of attention which is new for me, but this was the first time I didn't like.
Speaker 2:I felt sadness. Sometimes I was like, oh, I should be doing more, but I was like, but each time that I was seeing people it was so like I don't know, felt my cup up more than, like you said, quantity. Yeah, chef's kiss I love that.
Speaker 1:That's good, that's growth.
Speaker 2:Yeah, okay, and I got my rat tail back. Yeah, I'm not even going to use that as a victory. Ew, you refuse to touch it.
Speaker 1:Ew, yeah, but we should get into our victory vices. I'm so glad to hear that you had such a fun trip, despite maybe losing a really good friend. But you had some crazy adventures and I think it's always fun to like come back from a trip and be like, yeah, that shit was fucking crazy and yeah, I did some of it just for the plot period okay, victory and vice.
Speaker 2:Let's do this do you want me to go or do you want to go?
Speaker 1:I'll go first, because you've talked for like the whole I know and you probably made no sense. Go ahead. Yeah, I'll cut most of it literally. It's three minutes, it's just your clips.
Speaker 2:Don't be so funny. If one time you edited something, you're like oh, the edits up on the drive, it's just, it's just me. Yeah, caleb, you're fucking dumb, yeah for three minutes.
Speaker 1:Okay, my victory of the week is I just decided to take off yesterday from work and I told my boss I was like it is one of the last like really nice sunny days in the fall before. It's just like overcast and rainy and cold and, you know, snow's going to start falling. In the past and I like have really wanted to go see these fucking large trees which are like pine trees that turn bright yellow in the fall and they're like all these hikes you can go on, and so I've researched a bunch of them and I've like put together a couple like groups to like go do these. Like this larch hike, and it's fallen through again and again and, um, like one time it fell through because someone had gone on the same hike that I had planned and there were no, like they hadn't changed colors yet. So I was like, well, fuck that, skip, skip it, we'll do it like a month later, then another time, uh, and then the traffic oh yeah, the traffic, oh yes, exactly so there were like traffic issues, blah, blah blah.
Speaker 1:So for one reason or another, this thing just hasn't happened. So I was like you know what? It's the last sunny day before all the rain like hits Seattle. I'm going to drive three hours on a Tuesday out to Leavenworth.
Speaker 2:What? Yeah, I didn't know. It was that far I woke up at 730 in the morning.
Speaker 1:I didn't wonder why was that far? I woke up at 7 30 in the morning.
Speaker 2:I didn't wonder why you packed my bag.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and I drove out there by myself to lake cool chuck and it's like a nine mile hike round trip and I just did it by myself and girl it's like a almost 3 000 foot elevation gain.
Speaker 1:Some of it is like rock climbing. There's like crossing rivers and streams, parts like where you just like can't really tell where the trail like is going because of like the rocks and shit and branches that are in the way. It's like not that well maintained. So I definitely had like a couple like moments of panic where I was like, am I going in the right direction? I don't know. So by the time I get to the top I'm so exhausted, my legs are so tired, I'm so sore, I'm so hungry, I'm so thirsty and I'm so fucking thankful that I didn't get lost, that I made it to the top and I feel so accomplished and the lake is so gorgeous.
Speaker 1:The one downside was there were like almost no larch trees. I was like, fuck you, you stupid fucking larch trees. There were plenty, like down by the fucking parking lot. I didn't even need to go on like this hike, but the lake was stunning. Your eyes look great, thank you. The color of the lake, um. So anyways, that's my victory, because I did this really hard hike um and got to see a lake that I had wanted to see for a long time.
Speaker 2:A couple arches, but you know, not quite the stunning yellow that I was expecting on this trip and um yeah, that's so infamously unwell of you I know, fucking hell, because you're like wow, because it's actually really cool to hear you say all of this, because I'm like you're a bad bitch yeah, go ahead, pop up and then of course I did the lorax came and stole the fucking larch. Yeah, what the fuck.
Speaker 1:Um, I did get lost on the way back down, which you think, after you like hike up the mountain, that going back down it would be like much easier. Like you know, it's just right back down the same way. You came. Well, I don't know how, but this trail like split and I couldn't. I didn't know which way to go and somehow, um, towards the very end of the hike, I had to like cross a river and I was like I know I didn't cross the river, coming up the hill like neck deep in water, so I was like how did I get here?
Speaker 1:like how did I get on the other side of the river? It doesn't make any sense. So, anyways, I had to like jump across a couple stones, which I thought I was going to be really graceful, graceful doing, but, um, one of my uh feet ended up in the water, so I had like a soggy shoe for the last like I don't know half a mile, which honestly wasn't that bad but that sensation, I hate that sensation.
Speaker 1:I know it goes between your tootsies, yeah, and I have waterproof shoes, so they like just sit inside they weren't very waterproof?
Speaker 1:yeah well, yeah, not when your foot goes entirely under the water. Uh, water resistant. But I also um went immediately from hiking this 10 mile hike to my sommelier training class. So I like wasn't sure I was going to have enough time to even like make it. I wanted to stop at Leavenworth to grab a beer first, but then I, like Google, mapped it once I got back down to my car and I was like, no shit, you got to go right now. Once I got back down to my car and I was like, no shit, you gotta go right now. And so I went back um and did my sommelier training class sweaty as fuck, with no new deodorant or you know any cleaning products and a soggy shoe was this three mile, three hours, one way yeah, yeah, it was two hours back to Issaquah where I did my uh sommelier class, but and how many hours did it take you to this hike?
Speaker 1:for uh three and a half round trip. Yeah, god, so like nine and a half.
Speaker 2:Well, thank god, you were looking forward to that class, because there's not a lifetime I would show.
Speaker 1:I know I was like I just wanted to get a beer, so bad. And then I was like, wait, I get to go drink a bunch of wine.
Speaker 2:That's so fun I was talking oh, I think it was to Tristan about how excited I am for you to do this and for you to teach me more things about wine. I'm happy to.
Speaker 1:I'm sitting on a peak pool right now. Peak pool is like a white varietal from the south of France. It's actually from this little growing region called Penay. It's called a peak pool de Penay, but unless growing region called Pinay, it's called a peak pool day Pinay, but unless you grow it in Pinay, you can't even like spell it the right the same way. So okay, so my vice of the week is that I went to Walla Walla and it was freaking amazing, like I wasn't expecting it to be. It was freaking amazing Like I wasn't expecting it to be amazing because I'm from Sonoma and Napa and they have really great wines there.
Speaker 2:Oh, I didn't even know what's there.
Speaker 1:So it's like a wine. It's a wine region. Yeah, it's where all the wine in Washington basically is grown is in Walla Walla.
Speaker 2:Oh.
Speaker 1:So it's like it's four hours inland, or yeah.
Speaker 2:East East.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and there were some really shitty wines, I will say that, but I would have loved them. There were some really great ones too, and I got to give a shout out to Alton Wines. Alton Winery it's a husband and wife team that sold their like house in seattle during the pandemic. She works for nordstrom still and I'm a nordstrom girly um, so born again and she did our wine tasting and the husband now makes the wine and he is making just like gorgeous, elegant wines and she is curating this amazing like customer experience. They spent like millions of dollars on this property and building where the tasting room is. I also was there with an architect who knows the architect that built the winery, and so he was giving us all the insights on, like, what it takes to build something of this kind of grandeur, and so, between the winery, the tasting, with the owner, who's from nordstrom, and the wines being spectacular, I was just blown away. So interesting vice.
Speaker 1:just wait okay everyone's thinking and my vice is that I spent way too much money there on wine.
Speaker 2:Yeah, how many bottles did you buy?
Speaker 1:I only bought six bottles, but yeah, they didn't have a box. No, they didn't have a box. I do like that you upgraded to the black bottle box. What's it called black box? Black box, I know, but it's so much less wine, oh well, it's better.
Speaker 2:Oh, yeah, than your fucking friends. Yeah yeah, my taste buds are changing. Keep going.
Speaker 1:That's it.
Speaker 2:Your vice is a lot of times spending money. It really is. I know it's a problem it to not work period. Okay, slay your turn. Yay, I'm gonna start with uh, my vice um, not taking a day off between um traveling and going back to work. I landed sunday night here like 11 or something I didn't go to, or 11 30 finally, by the time I got to the car, I felt really bad. It's always hard to time here because you could taxi for a while because I felt bad, you had to wait.
Speaker 1:Well, you were stuck.
Speaker 2:And I think I went to bed at like 1 am after a three-hour time zone change. After driving to Atlanta getting stuck in traffic because it saves like a few hundred dollars Like I think this time it sent me like $400 not flying the 45-minute flight from Knoxville to Atlanta.
Speaker 1:Yeah, but then you're stuck in traffic for five hours and my time's worth more than that.
Speaker 2:Exactly. Yeah, that was not very smart for me to do that and I regret it, and I wanted to call in so damn badly. This is your vice. Yeah, still all my vice.
Speaker 1:And I did look at some of my work messages while I was gone and that didn't set me up for success either.
Speaker 2:That didn't set me up for success. My favorite nurse is quitting. I want to say my victory after I, because I already talked a lot about my trip. I did have a come to Jesus moment in my brain that I wrote down earlier. But I think and I even texted you and you asked me if I was high or if I was something I was just really appreciative of our experience at the Kygo concert.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah.
Speaker 2:And I only went. But I initially only bought tickets for Zara Larson, which she was great, she was fab.
Speaker 1:For you and someone else too, not even me.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I was, which she was great. She was fab for you and someone else too. Not even yeah, like just, I was like, oh, someone's probably gonna want to go, like I got a good deal, I'm just gonna go and get to because it I thought it would be something that I was like I can find someone for. Yeah, but I enjoyed it so much we had a ball. Yeah, we did and I did. It was like my first kind of ravey type, whatever experience with the little seedlings.
Speaker 1:We had a grand old time yeah, and just like really great like stage pyrotechnics and stage production and I've never gone to like a dj set and like, oh my god, this is great, or like yeah but, and it's fucking kygo, I mean, it's hit after hit after hit. Higher love, oh oh, one of my favorites.
Speaker 2:It's so good. Yeah, but my and we don't have to share all the details on it, but my favorite moment was at the very end, yeah, and I was trying to leave after Higher Love and you were like no, we need to stay. Is it called Freeze? The last song is called Freeze. And you're like, no, we have to stay. And I'm freeze. And you're like, no, we have to stay. And I'm like, okay, I do have to. I might piss my pants, but okay, yeah, and I'm like okay this is a vibey song.
Speaker 1:And then, like I came up to you and I was like the reason I want to stay for this is because this song means a lot to me, because it's a song that my ex would play all the time, and when we were like going through our hardest like parts of our breakup, I would just like think to myself like it would be so great if we could just like hit the like freeze button on our relationship and just like stop it in its tracks and like, because I could see it progressing down this like path of like not going in a good direction and, like you know, towards breakup, and I just wanted to like freeze it to freeze, and so that's why I was like I'm just gonna share that with you, not thinking that it was gonna be like super emotional, but then it was and so you were behind me, we were like hugging and just like enjoying the moment, and you had a a big, emotional connection.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I'll say to the song, because I could feel you like just really breathing and like they were. Yeah, the tears were kind of like did drop did they drop on you?
Speaker 1:yeah, and and then like you were sobbing.
Speaker 2:Okay, no, like I'm not being dramatic and I'm not trying to like no, no no, don't take it.
Speaker 2:I just wouldn't categorize it as sobbing, but I say feel like yeah yeah, that's sobbing, but like I don't do it to patronize you patronize you. I don't feel like that. I just appreciated that we got to experience that together and that you were like. This means a lot to me. We were doing it together and you just felt comfortable enough to do that, because I wouldn't do that with a lot of people that I would go to a concert with. So it just was that, and then we just had a playful, fun time yeah, we got to go down that random ass entrance.
Speaker 2:Do you not remember what happened afterwards?
Speaker 1:what, oh, the pissing and the porsche? Wait, we have to include that, no, oh my god, I'm not very proud of that.
Speaker 2:I'm telling them.
Speaker 1:So um imagine before you, before you get there. There was also this girl, when the lights came on after freeze, who was like, also sobbing. I would say she was sobbing. I had like a couple glistening tears and, you know, a couple catch my breath moments.
Speaker 1:Meanwhile I'm under the hair dryer it's like, oh my god, did I have sea salt spray and I just like turned to this girl and I was like, really, they have to turn the lights on right right now, like while we're crying, like you can't just like wait a couple seconds so like we can stop crying. And she made her like laugh. And then that made me laugh and so, you know, we got to like I feel like other people were crying. That's the moral of the story.
Speaker 2:Well, it's it was the perfect ending because it they took us on an emotional. I just did not expect, yeah, a dj to be able. It just was wonderful, yeah, curated, crafted so well, yeah. And after the lights came on, we're like, oh my god, the line's so long we're not waiting for the bathroom no.
Speaker 2:So we, like, are going. It's just so funny because I made a comment like what do people come up here? Um, so we found this parking lot and I'm like let's go to the very back corner. We're just gonna pee. We're at mid piss. There's a car between us. We're peeing on the ground because we're not that kind of friends, we're not looking at each other piss, I tell you. I see people walking up.
Speaker 1:I'm like k Kyle, Kyle, kyle, kyle, kyle I said stop peeing, stop peeing.
Speaker 2:I zip up and then like we start like walking, and they could tell what we were doing. And he was like did you just piss on my fucking car? I was like no, you're being dramatic, we are just pissing by your car, yeah, and then the woman stops us again. You pissed on the fucking car and I'm like just say you don't have money if you're that concerned.
Speaker 1:Right, just go get it washed, if you're really that concerned.
Speaker 2:You're in between a Tesla Model Y a Porsche, yeah.
Speaker 1:And also I'm like fuck you guys.
Speaker 2:Do you know how hard it is to cut off midstream Like they? Should have appreciated our talent there was a lot of talent, yeah I forgot all about that experience. Yeah, what a good victory. Yeah, okay, all right, I'm tired of talking all right.
Speaker 1:Well, that's our episode for the week. We talked a lot about so many different topics. I mean, you're a whore. You also, you know, navigated some difficult situations with friends over the past week. But if you want to tell us about important friendships in your life and how they have shaped you or how they've ebbed and flowed over your lifetime, then write in to unfamouslyunwell at gmailcom. You can send us direct messages at unfamouslyunwell on Instagram, or you can click the little link in the bio and send us a text message. That way, we'd love to hear from you and hear about your victories and vices.
Speaker 2:Or actually I want to hear about their fucking chaotic ass stories about how they're sleeping next to a sweaty man in the bed after their friend is dry heating like being a good friend.
Speaker 1:We want to hear about being a good friend and the sacrifices that you make above and beyond. That's what I want to hear we want to hear all about those stories until next week we wish you well.
Speaker 2:Porsches suck get punched in the throat. I don't know. Thanks for listening to another episode of Unfamously Un. Miss you. Well, porsches suck Get punched in the throat.
Speaker 1:I don't know. Thanks for listening to another episode of Unfamously Unwell, the unrated podcast hosted by your two favorite Seattle homosexuals on a journey to higher health. Listen each week as we deep dive into a new topic and give you all the dirty details of our successes and failures along the way.
Speaker 2:You can send us your questions, feedback or share your own victory advice by writing to unfamouslyunwell at gmailcom or by clicking the link at the bottom of the description to shoot us a text. We'd love to hear from you and share your stories on the pod.
Speaker 1:We'll see you back here next week for another unhinged episode of Unfamously Unwell. Unrated.