Chuco Chuckle
Conversational podcast with guests that include local artisans, business owners, friends, musicians, and other different walks of life here in El Paso, Texas.
Chuco Chuckle
Raul Melendez-Healing Through Speaking: A Family's Journey After the El Paso Walmart Shooting
For Raul Melendez and his family, August 3, 2019, began as an ordinary Saturday. His daughter Kaitlyn was shopping with her grandparents at Walmart during Tax-Free Weekend. Then, a phone call changed everything: "My dad, he was shot."
What followed was a nightmare of chaos, confusion, and eventually, devastating loss. Raul's father-in-law David was among the 23 people killed in the El Paso Walmart shooting, dying heroically as he shielded his granddaughter and wife from the gunman. Under a court-mandated gag order for nearly six years, this is Raul's first opportunity to share his family's story publicly.
The conversation reveals the profound, lasting trauma experienced by shooting survivors and their families. Kaitlyn, now approaching 15, still attends therapy weekly and struggles with loud noises and the smell of gunpowder. Raul's military PTSD has taken on new purpose as he helps his daughter navigate her own trauma. Meanwhile, his wife Stephanie has become the family's rock, caring for her mother who lost her provider and their daughter who lost her sense of safety.
Perhaps most frustrating for the families has been the protracted legal process. While the federal case moved relatively quickly, the state case has dragged on for years despite promises from prosecutors. "This is a win, this is a no-lose case," Raul explains, questioning why justice has been so elusive. The recent decision to forgo the death penalty feels like another letdown after years of waiting.
Through their pain, the Melendez family has found unexpected sources of support, including a biker group called Guardians of the Children who "adopted" Kaitlyn and attend her events. Their story is a powerful reminder of how violence tears through communities long after the shooting stops and headlines fade. Despite everything, they're determined to rebuild their lives and honor David's memory by moving forward.
Have you checked on someone who's experienced trauma lately? Reach out, listen, and simply be there. Sometimes healing starts with breaking the silence.
Welcome to Choco Choco. This is Arnie. Once again, thank you for joining me on Chukwuchuk. We've got kind of a different show today. Ro is my guest today, along with Nate, and we're going to have you introduce. They're going to introduce themselves, but it's a little bit different. It's just we're talking about the controversial shooting that happened at Walmart August 3rd and Ro thanks for joining me on the show today. Nate, thank you for coming as well.
Speaker 2:Yeah, of course, thank you, bud, yeah.
Speaker 1:So I'm just going to start with your story, man. Go ahead and start with what you got Okay well again.
Speaker 3:thank you, arnie, for inviting me on here again, and they had a gag order right, so this is kind of the first time you've been able to just talk, speak out about it a little bit.
Speaker 2:yeah, yeah it's been rough for the last almost six years now. So not being able to talk about it, you know, within friends it's different, but you know, never an official interview or anything like that. But yeah, you know, august 3rd was was a rough day for my family and I. You know it's something that we'll never forget. Um, you know, just august 3rd was just a heavy day. Man like and not just not just for you, but for a yeah for a lot of families that were unfortunately there.
Speaker 2:You know, like how it happened with us my daughter who was at the Walmart. She had spent the night with my in-laws and they were going to go to Walmart to get I guess I think it was a TV show that just came out from Disney. They started selling things. It was back-to-school specials at Walmart.
Speaker 3:Oh, it was Tax-Free Weekend, remember. Yeah, that's right. Oh right, it was.
Speaker 2:Tax-Free.
Speaker 1:Weekend. That's what it was.
Speaker 2:And it was just a regular day. I just dropped off my youngest daughter with my parents. My wife was at work. I went to work. How old was your daughter at the time? Uh, my oldest, uh, she was nine. She had was about to turn nine. So, yeah, she was super young, you know, yeah. And now she's in high school. Yeah, she's in high school, about to be 15. Wow, you know, totally different from what I remember her when she used to be, you know cause it's rough man Like you know.
Speaker 2:Just like I was saying, you know, just August 3rd was just. It felt like a regular day at first, of course 1030,. I was at work. A coworker of mine's like hey, your wife's on the phone, she sounds really used.
Speaker 1:You were at work.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I was at work.
Speaker 2:Okay, I was at work. It was roughly around 1030 in the morning.
Speaker 3:Was it a Friday or?
Speaker 2:Saturday.
Speaker 3:It was a.
Speaker 1:Saturday it was a Saturday morning, I know, because it's actually my ex-wife's birthday, oh wow. And so we were actually making a cake for somebody's birthday and then we were going to go celebrate her birthday with her dad. But go ahead, I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:No, no, you're fine, you're fine. And, like I was saying, I was just working for coworkers, like, hey, your wife's on the phone. I think you need to answer it. She sounds really stressed out. So I was like, well, all right, this is sad as the ordinary.
Speaker 1:You can already feel it.
Speaker 3:Out of the blue, hadn't looked at your cell phone or anything.
Speaker 2:No, because you know me, I follow policies. If I can't have the cell phone at work, well then I don't use it. Exactly. So, yeah, and you know, I can hear in my wife's voice she's like and my dad, he was shot. I was like he was shot. What are you talking about? He's like yeah, he was shot at Walmart, caitlin's with him, and that doesn't even sound real. Yeah.
Speaker 3:I thought you know it, just I thought I was hearing things.
Speaker 1:What does that mean? Your dad's been shot Exactly.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so that's what I had thought. You know it was either a sick joke and my wife doesn't do that, you know she's very, you know, normal. But when she had said that, I was like what?
Speaker 1:do you mean?
Speaker 2:Where? Where did he get shot? And you know, she was just like Caitlin's with him, my mom's with him and I was like where they're? At the Walmart. I was like what the heck, what the heck's going on. My manager and they were all in the manager's meeting and I was like his name was edgar and I was like, hey, edgar, uh, you know, um, apparently my father-in-law was shot at walmart. He goes, he was shot. I was like, yeah, well, wait a second, aren't you guys getting alerts?
Speaker 1:at this time not yet.
Speaker 2:No, okay, go ahead yet. So. So that's that's what I was going to bring up is that. You know, my manager's like yeah, do you need someone to drive you there? Like like he thought like, yeah, it's a shooting, like, yeah, maybe someone can drive you. I was like, no, no, I'm fine, I'll drive myself. Grab my phone. And that's when I started hearing that the amber alert.
Speaker 3:But you know, you get so used to hearing that you think it's just, you know, an amber alert right enough yeah let's be honest, doesn't pertain to me you're an amber alert, we're just kind of like that's, that's not el paso, yeah and, um, I saw my managers pick up their phone and they're looking at it and I'm already out the door.
Speaker 2:I'm running to my car, I get on and this was on North Loop and Zaragoza and I remember just taking North Loop all the way down to Litruvino, turning right on Litruv, the pedal to the metal and I was just gone and I get onto the highway and then that's when I noticed two cops coming right behind me. I was like oh man. You're done. I was like I'm going to get pulled over and they just passed me. They ignored me and I was like, oh crap, they're going the same place. I'm going yeah.
Speaker 3:Was that instant instant you thought that right away. Yeah, they got to be going where I'm going. Yeah, because I was going towards walmart question.
Speaker 2:Right, yeah, I was going towards walmart, they passed me and I was like, you know, if they're not pulling me over, that's going 110 at this point. Yeah, something's going down, you know. And then I try to get off of uh, where it's uh, hawkins and i-10 and everything's blocked off already. Yeah, everything's blocked off. And you know, I was in my little, my little, standard, small four-door car. So I go through where hawkins is at and this cop stops me. And I was like, hey, you know what, my, my, uh, my daughter, my, my father-in-law, my mother-in-law, they're at the walmart. And you know, I'm just here to to see if everything's okay. And the guy's like listen, I need you to like wait somewhere, not here. And I was like what's going on? He's like well, apparently there's still an active shooter. And I was like, oh, wow, so this is starting to become bigger than I thought it was.
Speaker 3:Yeah, and let's be honest, and kudos to the law enforcement.
Speaker 2:They're just not ready for that.
Speaker 3:Now, and kudos to the law enforcement. They're just not ready for that. Yeah now, how did now? Well, I mean also your former military. So did any like ptsd kick in? Did you did? Was that settled in yet, or not yet?
Speaker 2:no, I think it wasn't getting there yet, because, you know, I was still kind of in shock, of course, I wasn't noticing exactly what was going on.
Speaker 1:I thought maybe it was a random shooting, yeah, yeah, or something, something gone wrong, okay, you know, like a robbery or something.
Speaker 2:Until I started seeing all these cops and and all these people, like you know, blocking off this area, I was like, oh my god, this is something bigger than than what it is do you have your wife like on speaker we?
Speaker 2:were calling back each other back and forth and my wife's like, oh, the fire marshal's saying that you know, caitlin and my mom are at the Sam's and I was like, well, where's David? And she goes. Well, I don't know. They haven't told us anything. And you know, when I got to that place, where on Hawkins and I-10, when the cop's, like you know, when I got to that place where the on hawkins and i-10, when the cops, like you know he's like you need to go somewhere other than here, and I was like can I just leave my vehicle here and go on foot? And you know, I always conceal, carry and I carry.
Speaker 3:and I had my, my, my pistol on the side of my right foot, like I owe your license to carry.
Speaker 2:Yeah right and the cop saw me and he goes listen, if you get out and they see you with that, they're going to think you're the shooter. Wow, good point. Yeah, so he's like I suggest you find somewhere to wait. They're going to contact you guys. And then at that time my wife called me. She goes hey, we're going to meet up at my mom's. Their house is literally a couple blocks away from that Walmart. All right, so I was like, okay, I'll meet you guys there, right there in the Burgess area. Yeah, okay, fairly close, it's more closer towards the Hawkins area. Okay, so it's like maybe four blocks away from the Walmart. Wow, super close. And you know. So I was like all right, I'll meet you guys there. I go there.
Speaker 2:My brother shows up, which I didn't call him, I guess. My wife called my brother, my friend Rick. He showed up with his wife and they're like hey, what's going on? We heard and we decided to stop to see what's going on. I was like I don't know what's going on. And then at that time they called us saying hey, they moved Caitlin and my mother-in-law to another location. Do you know who's calling you? I think I believe it was the fire marshal or a police investigator, I don't know.
Speaker 3:So somebody's with them. Yeah, and they're like we'll call. So. Your daughter, nine years old, doesn't have a cell phone yet. Yeah no. You're calling your mother-in-law, I'm assuming Not answering.
Speaker 2:Exactly, Okay, yeah, and you know the fire marshal. I don't remember if it was a fire marshal or police officer, but they said, hey, they're at this location. Right, you can come over here and, you know, meet with your daughter and your mother-in-law. So my brother's like Raul, you're not driving, I'm going to drive. He's like you're in no position to drive right now. Where are you guys at when everybody meets you At Stephanie's parents' house?
Speaker 3:Okay, it's like a few blocks away.
Speaker 2:Okay, so we're all there. I was like all right. So, rick and his family, they end up going back to their house and my brother drives us and again we're going like 90 on the highway. We get there, you know, and then they tell us, you know, only one parent can go inside To the Sam's, to the SAMS, no, no, to the new location. So they moved everyone from the SAMS to this new location. And we get there and, you know, my wife goes in. I'm waiting outside and my brother just looks at me and he's like hey, you okay, dude. I was like no, dude. That's when it started kicking in Right, really, really bad, the PTSD. And you know and I remember telling my brother this and it's something that I'll never forget and I was like hey, albert, you know everything that I've done out there. You think it's karma, like it's coming back to me. That's my brother's like don't think like that dude, it's not.
Speaker 3:It has nothing to do with you you know, but you know it's this. You know the ptsd, the things you have to do when you're out there, you know that's when it starts to settle in and everything is like a you know, yeah, so so once that all happened, you know, yeah.
Speaker 2:So once that all happened, you know, my wife was able to go get my daughter. My mother-in-law and I just I'll never forget the look on my daughter's face, Like she's a totally different person, Like different kid. That's not my daughter. Yeah, she was in shock. You know, she's just super quiet, which she never was before. You know she just really really Happy. She's just super quiet, which she never was before.
Speaker 3:You know. She just really, really happy. This was Saturday night, it's Saturday afternoon.
Speaker 2:Saturday afternoon when you get like maybe like three hours after everything and went down so maybe like one or two in the afternoon. So are you wondering where's my father-in-law? Yeah, that was, you know, when I didn't see them, see him with with, but you know, when I didn't see him with my mother and my daughter, I already knew that I was like he's probably at the hospital, but you know, prior service you already know like, hey, Right, and not to jump ahead.
Speaker 3:I remember I had messaged you you were going to come out and I think it was already Sunday. I think it was the day after and they still weren't telling anybody anything Pretty much the ones that were deceased. Am I correct on? You know, kind of, and I remember you had messaged me and you had said no, you know, like they still can't find my father-in-law. I think you used something like that.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:And, like you said, even somebody, just you know, not knowing what's going on, even I was like he might have been, you know, one of the deceased, but I know you didn't want to say that. I know those words it was, I could feel it. I know the family just doesn't want to say it. They want to say, you know, maybe he's one of the unidentified, but everybody clearly that was in the hospital was identified correct exactly, you know.
Speaker 2:And then that's the thing, because that was the next day, uh, during that same day we went back to, uh, the del sol hospital, right, and we were sitting there and, you know, one by one, we were seeing families now are you guys calling every hospital? Yeah well, I I talked to a buddy of mine which I I won't say his name because of hipaa violations and stuff like that, so but you know who I'm talking about it's el paso, right?
Speaker 3:I mean, we're gonna, we're gonna find the connections.
Speaker 2:We have exactly and we're gonna yeah, yeah, I mean we have cop buddies that.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you know, we call for favors. We got lawyer buddies, yeah, lawyer yeah.
Speaker 2:So when we're at the hospital, you know, like I said, I started noticing families one by one being relocated. They're like, oh, they're here, you know you can go see him or her, and you know it was. They came down to like two families it was us and someone else, some other family and we were just like just waiting to see if they could find david. You know, and that's when I started calling my buddy. I was like, hey, you know, you know, this is what's going on here. He knew what was going on. He's like he's like I can't tell you that he's here or not, but if I were you, I would keep looking Right. So that was code.
Speaker 2:Like I was not on the list of the ones that got admitted to the hospital that he was at mother-in-law and your daughter at this point so, um, when we put we relocated with uh, caitlin and and my mother-in-law, I took caitlin to my parents house which is all the way on the other side of the town.
Speaker 3:You know he said they started watching her, and then you feel like you had to just get her as far away as possible yeah, and I told my parents don't turn on the tv, put on cartoons, if anything.
Speaker 1:Just don't put on the news, because and I hate to say that, but this is about the quietest I've ever been on my podcast and I want to thank you for asking all the questions, because I'm just because you don't? You guys are closer friends than I am of course, but uh, I want to say that because, uh, everybody's gonna be like, well, how come arnie's not talking? But nate has taken a great role.
Speaker 3:Thanks for being a great co-host for me well, well, arnie, I know and I was talking about this because I know, like you know my fiance's like really Like where are you going?
Speaker 1:And I said I don't think Arnie knows this and, to be honest, I wouldn't even know what to ask, right?
Speaker 3:And maybe you might feel uncomfortable because you're like well, you know, I just want to scratch the surface, yeah, but Raul and I I mean Raul's in my wedding, so I mean I think you and I are pretty you know pretty close like brothers?
Speaker 1:Yeah, exactly.
Speaker 3:And again, there's stuff that I also want to know. I mean, you know, so I'm asking you to be honest for the first time I'm asking you these questions. We didn't rehearse this. We have no notes in front of us, right, right?
Speaker 1:right. So I mean, if you guys could see, this is how my podcasts are always like this Never no notes. If you guys could see Arnie's face.
Speaker 3:he's very like In shock. It's almost like we're there.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, Like you know, we're there again, so I'm sorry.
Speaker 2:No, no, you guys are fine and that's good. I mean again, everything happened, you know, and it's just rough, you know.
Speaker 3:I I think that's when you and I got uh like our brotherhood.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so we knew each other, maybe for about like two years, maybe just hung out here and there I came to your social environment.
Speaker 1:You know what I mean, but afterwards um you know that's a different dynamic now, yeah, I did a fundraiser yeah and um, he told me no, he's like no, I no.
Speaker 3:I said I'm doing it. I said no disrespect, but I'm going to do it. You know, I'm going to do it anyway. Yeah. And then that's kind of how we became close.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and he was right Because he had told me he's like you know, bills are going to come out of nowhere.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, you know.
Speaker 2:I said they Exactly, and you know what?
Speaker 1:And then because of that fundraiser, you did help out with a lot, and so again, eternally grateful for the friendship that you've given me, the fundraiser that you've done and again.
Speaker 3:I don't mean to interrupt, I just want to say thanks.
Speaker 2:No, yeah, of course. So you took Caitlin as far as possible. And then your wife's mom. She was with Stephanie at the hospital until I got back and, yeah, like I said, you know, they're getting relocated. And that's when it really sunk into my head. I was like you know what? You don't lose someone. You don't you know, especially if they're getting transported to a hospital. He had his wallet, he had IDs on him. You don't lose someone. And that's when it really hit me. I was like he's either.
Speaker 3:He's probably still there and your wife was an EMT right. Yeah, she was an EMT, so she knows, yeah, she knows Like she knows, yeah, she knows Right, but you know you got to be hopeful.
Speaker 2:You know she had faith. Yeah, you know. But yeah, like I knew, we'll let you guys know more tomorrow. We'll call you guys. My wife couldn't sleep, you know. I was at home and I told my wife I was like, listen, why don't you go back to your mom's house, stay with your mom? You know your sister's flying down. She's coming out because of what happened. Another brother-in-law of mine was also from Nebraska. He was going to come down and where did she fly from? What was that she was flying from? She was flying from at the time, I believe, was Colorado.
Speaker 3:Denver.
Speaker 2:So everybody's coming in. Yeah, everyone's coming in. And you know I told my wife I was like I'll stay home with the kids. You know, just go do what you gotta do. And I was more worried about Caitlin, you know, I didn't hear anything from her all night. Really.
Speaker 3:Yeah, did you try to like. Hey, are you hungry, like you know? How was? How was your ice breaking? Oh, it's, it's awkward man.
Speaker 2:It was hard, you know all I would hear.
Speaker 3:Because, like you, you're not talking to a fellow soldier who's PTSD, you're talking to your daughter, yeah.
Speaker 1:Nine-year-old daughter.
Speaker 3:Everything's on pause. You know what I mean. And you're trying to hit the play button. Yeah.
Speaker 2:And it's just. I'm trying to accept the fact this happened. But let's try to get over it right away and you just can't. So I know my daughter didn't sleep that night. She says she did, but I know she didn't. You know we wake up super early, maybe like 7 in the morning. I get the girls ready, we go to my in-laws' house and you know everyone's there, everyone's just. You know it's just awkward, everyone's just sitting around and waiting. How old was your?
Speaker 3:super youngest at man at the time. Let's see, oh man, she must have been like one or two.
Speaker 2:Okay, so no need to. She has. Yeah, no, wow, okay. Now I don't think if we even talked about it like she would remember any of that. She, I know, she, she remembers david, I know she does. But, yeah, you know, she's getting to that point where she doesn't. I know she doesn't know what he looks like anymore. You know, besides pictures, you know, and, uh, yeah, so you know that next day we're just waiting around. Macarthur was the school, that was, yeah, that were. That's where all the information was going to that, literally right by the walmart as well now uh all the bodies are still in the walmart.
Speaker 2:I understand from from what I know. I think.
Speaker 3:I believe at this point yeah, they're not even moving they got to do an investigation. Right, because they couldn't move them, because now it's a crime scene.
Speaker 2:It's a crime scene.
Speaker 3:Times. You know however many yeah.
Speaker 1:I got a shot on Instagram from a friend of mine in Arizona. He goes what's going on in El Paso Once again, we're making our cake right and he shoots me a shot of a body on the floor. Of course they cut all that stuff out. Right, that's when they start to be able to edit and pull stuff out and I still have that picture on my phone and there's a body on the floor. I'm like holy crap.
Speaker 3:And it's going to start to come out, which is something that you and I talked about. We've discussed other school shootings. You know other massive you know shootings and eventually all that stuff comes out. You know we live in that world of internet and Raul's, like this, is the part that scares me now. Yeah, because your daughter's older. Yeah, your younger daughter's older. We live in a world where it's like we're going to get it now and your daughter's older.
Speaker 3:Yeah, your younger daughter's older. We live in a world where it's like we're gonna get it now and now the gag order is lifted, nobody can really get in trouble. You know any. The dark web, the regular web that you know what I mean and that's what he's saying like those stuff is gonna resurface and I know you said that's that's the next thing you're like it's just, it's coming back out yeah, it's a reliving.
Speaker 2:Yeah, because my daughter right now she's doing good, you know, she's, she's, she's getting there, you know she's been through therapy and everything. Yeah, she's still going, yeah, oh yeah, every thursday. Every thursday she goes yeah, yeah and uh, yeah, that's. That's one thing I'm worried about is that once those videos start coming out, like, how do you, how do you talk to your kid about that? You know, like, and you're right, like with the fellow soldier, you'd be like, oh, do you remember that? Like, do you remember?
Speaker 2:this and it's easy for us to understand it, because we're older, you know. But the kid, how do you, how do you have that conversation? You know it's. It's just. This is rough. I'm not ready for it. I know it's going to happen, but when it does I can hopefully I say the right thing.
Speaker 1:You not only have to deal with your own losing your father-in-law but you're dealing with your wife. You have to comfort her like crazy, yeah, and then now you're a child.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's rough. How are you doing? I'm doing the best I can. Some days are harder than others, but I always get up and got to go do what I got to do. Sometimes I do remember. Sometimes, yeah, I mean as parents and especially your wife.
Speaker 3:She's dealing with her daughter, she's dealing with the loss of her father and she's dealing with her mom, who is a survivor, and then all that branches out, you know, to families and like, like I, I'm your friend, so I know, you know, kind of like how you kind of have to navigate and you know what I mean and I can only imagine you know stuff. Do you remember any other families, like maybe when you were going to, was it macarthur or or the you know the safe spots, or the do you remember?
Speaker 3:you know other families like? Were you kind of looking at them, or were they looking at you, or were people like holding on to each other? What was that?
Speaker 1:like oh man, it's, it's, you know it's a, it's a community you don't want to belong to.
Speaker 2:Yeah, exactly, perfect words. You said it like we're part of a group now that we never wanted to be part of. Yeah, and my wife has communication with some of the families and they talk to each other here and there. See how everything's going, especially with the courts and everything, and I'm not good with names.
Speaker 3:I'm good with faces.
Speaker 2:So every time we've gone to the courtroom I remember the families. And they look the same way we do. Just deep down inside we're hurting, but we just got to show a strong face when we're out there and you're thinking the whole time why did this happen?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah, it's. You know, Senseless.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it's just ridiculous how he could have done all that over there. I think he was from Fort Worth or Dallas. Yeah, Dallas.
Speaker 1:Allen Texas. And that's nine, ten hours to contemplate or rethink. Should I do this? I shouldn't do this.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the ten-hour drive Ten-hour drive. You'd be like you know what. Is it really worth going out there for ten hours?
Speaker 1:But it sucks. What am I doing?
Speaker 2:Yeah, so you know that guy had evil in his heart, hate in his heart, right, he had it, you know.
Speaker 3:And sick in his mind.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know, it's just one of those things that you know. Like I said, he should be getting you know and I'm jumping on that Go ahead, no go ahead. And he should be getting death. He should be getting death.
Speaker 1:You're not the only one that feels that way.
Speaker 2:No, I know the majority of the families do. The majority of the city feels that way.
Speaker 3:Right, yeah, you want to jump to that, arnie Raul, it's up to you. No, no, yeah, totally, we're talking to Raul Melendez Nate Valenzuela.
Speaker 1:I'm Arnie, of course, and joining us on Chucco Chuckle today, but no chuckling today. Yeah, we always talk about how 9-1-5 is just a very.
Speaker 3:We're the biggest small city. We all know somebody. We all kind of and this is that burden that El Paso has now.
Speaker 1:I'm not saying everybody's experienced loss. I've experienced a lot of my loss myself, but I think tragic loss is so much quicker. Of course it's quicker, of course, and it's just I don't even know, really I didn't know what, just to even say. It's saying this podcast dude, and that's not like me, to not think of what to say or know what to say. Nathan knows I'm not a man of no words, but thanks for coming. I mean I just want to keep on going.
Speaker 2:Sorry, no, no, you're fine, thank you again once again for inviting me. It's the first time, like I said, bringing out this story out there Because of the gag order, yeah, so let's talk about that.
Speaker 3:I mean, the reason we're here is because in most recent news, the new, I guess, district attorney yeah, who got voted in, who campaigned on the death penalty, they that he was for it, yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, he campaigned on it. That's why we voted for him too, right.
Speaker 3:And you're honest about that. A lot of people don't want to say who they voted for. And this isn't the biggest political issue, but it is politics.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 3:And you are willing to come out and be like yes, we voted for that the previous DA, and they'd been dropping the ball and prolonging cases. Yeah, and you've said it plenty of times In other cities, we're watching these murderers, these shooters, get processed within like a year or two, less, you know, because of COVID.
Speaker 2:I know that was an excuse that the da's use, the judges use. Oh, the covid delight denied, uh delayed us a little bit. Here's the thing, though the george floyd case, right, happened that same year, and it was done in a matter of months, like three months I think something like that yeah and that was during covid preach. Yeah, you know, and in here it's, it's it's open in closed case, you know, like that's close case, like we have all the evidence, you know he did it why are we motive everything?
Speaker 2:yeah it's like why are we delaying this?
Speaker 3:I read last night and it was just something, you know, not even preparing for this. But you know the luigi mangioni or whatever, who shot the, the, the CEO of the health care insurance, the DA, said, we, we will be giving him the death penalty. Yeah, and then, right next to it, they compared this you know, clown murderer, um and he's. You know they've negotiated to give him, you know, uh, life and life, and for that which is ridiculous because there's.
Speaker 2:It just makes our city look sad yeah you know it seems like we can't do anything, especially with the justice system. We can't. It seems like, you know, we got to delay things for no reason. You know there's controversy with the old da. You know, by the way, she's never been like, whatever she did, that that's totally legal. How come she's not in case? Like, how come she's not? You know she resigned Right, especially because of the conspiracy that was going on. You know, like, how come that's not being investigated? You know, do you want to talk about that? Talk about anything, guys, because maybe I don't.
Speaker 3:I'm not too familiar with the conspiracy theory Are you Arnie. No theory. Are you learning?
Speaker 1:no, so maybe yeah, you know, this is your opinion.
Speaker 3:So anybody out there, yeah, but like everybody, we want to know where? Yeah, yeah we're opasso, we like cheese we like the cheese man exactly. So what? What conspiracy theory is out?
Speaker 2:there. So, uh, we had heard this. You know, when there was first, you know the first da was delaying, when they were delaying the, the whole case, right, you know they were saying that the defense team isn't ready, you know, for the case. That's what the excuse was. And you know, the DA, the old DA, was like oh no, I'm ready for it, like let's go. And then when we go to the court, the first court, the judge was like really like scolding the DA, saying she was unprofessional, she was this, she was that, or like well, what the heck's going on? Like we weren't expecting that and this is court records.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you're not slandering anybody.
Speaker 2:No, no, no that's what the judge was saying, like he was like really scolding her and we had thought maybe it was the defense team that they were talking about, wow, but no, it was about the da saying that she was being unprofessional, she wasn't ready for the case. Was the word incompetent thrown thrown in there?
Speaker 1:Oh God, if I can remember, that it sounds like it would be 100%. Yeah.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but that's when that gag order came out. That's when that judge put the gag order because you know someone one of the family members had gotten a threat. You know we didn't know who it was.
Speaker 1:We're like, oh who is it, and we, you know A threat, threat of what?
Speaker 2:Death threats that apparently some information was coming out and someone was threatening them and we were like what's going on? And we talked to the other family members and they're like, well, they haven't threatened us or this, this and that. Well, it turns out it was one of the family members that was the one who died, was from Juarez, I believe, or Chihuahua, oh wow.
Speaker 3:Yeah, so somebody of the family that had passed away in Mexico.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and that they were receiving threats. I don't know if they were death threats, but you know threats. And they think it was coming from the DA. Yeah, that's the conspiracy, you know and there's. You know it's a rumor, right, but with all rumors there's a little bit of truth in there, of course.
Speaker 3:Right where there's smoke, there's fire.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so we were like, wow, what's going on? And you know, we didn't hear anything else from it. And then that's when the DA resigned, after we had found out, after we heard that that's going around, you know the why? Are you getting nothing to hide exactly? And then that was the end of it like. Then another temporary da came in. He already knew. He's like hey, I can't, you know, ask for the death penalty, because I'm going to be replaced either way, right.
Speaker 3:And then you know, he'd kind of said right that it was like it was like overwhelming, yeah, like the previous d, they hadn't done anything yeah, it was it's.
Speaker 2:It seemed like they just left it on the table and just once again el paso not being ready, right yeah yeah, and that's been.
Speaker 3:You know the story that has been carried over with this case. Yeah, on to the next. To the next is like oh, we're not prepared, and that's in the papers, that's in the court documents. It's just, we're not ready, judge hey do your job.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you got one job.
Speaker 2:Exactly, you know, and every time we would go to court, that's what we'd hear.
Speaker 1:Can you imagine what I said. If I go to work and say you know what, I'm not ready for work today.
Speaker 3:But you campaigned on it. But on it, but you said I'm the best person for this job.
Speaker 1:I'm the best person for this job. Hire me and then we give it to you, yeah. And you're like wait, I'm not ready. I'm not ready.
Speaker 3:Give me a couple months or another year please, but pay me, yeah, but pay me your tax dollars.
Speaker 2:So yeah, every time we would go to court they'd be like, hey, you guys are not ready this, this and that year, like boom, right there, 12 months. So I'm like, oh, just gotta wait for another year. And then you know covid was going on. That was another year delay, right then this.
Speaker 3:That was another, this was priority.
Speaker 2:You know what I mean this should have been number one, not traffic tickets, that that they're still calling us in.
Speaker 3:You know I'm not. You know, whatever it is, you know, dwis right. Whatever I mean, this was elo's number one. Yeah.
Speaker 1:Number one, darkest hour.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and it's just crazy, how you know it's just. How are you going to delay this? Now, it's going to be six years this year, six years. Like, how are we going to delay this case six years? This is a win, this is a no-lose case.
Speaker 3:It's a home run. Yeah, lose case, it's a home run. Yeah, I mean, if, if you were campaigning and you wanted to win your campaign and keep your word, this would have been it. This is a home run yeah and then you get it. So do you want to? You want to talk about that. Do you want to talk about?
Speaker 2:the new da, so he would saying that you know, we spoke to the families and this is what all they all, we all wanted, which is yes and no, we all wanted the death penalty, but I think all the families and this is what all they all, we all wanted, which is yes and no, we all wanted the death penalty, but I think all the families are just tired and they just want to get it done with yeah.
Speaker 3:So do you think that he took some words and twisted them and out of context, because he said black and white I campaigned for the death penalty, I want the death penalty, I want to see him. Then everybody voted on that and he said on tv and then I believe fit fam, you know, took a a piece of the interview because I commented on it and he said but the only reason I didn't is because I spoke to every single family and you said, not me, yeah yeah, well, he did speak to staff, okay, you know, and you know.
Speaker 2:But that's exactly what I'm saying is that, yeah, we all want debt, but I guess we're just just tired of it, man, we just want it to be done with. You know, and that's the sad thing is that I think that's what they wanted. They wanted us to just drag it out, so that way everyone can get tired of it and that way they can just, you know, keep getting that paycheck that they're getting. It's like a bad insurance claim it's funny.
Speaker 3:You know my dad, who's also a veteran. He says that you know he's in his 80s and he's still fighting the va for disability and he's like they just want me to go away. They know, eventually I'll give up, eventually he'll give up, or you know he's gonna pass. You's going to pass because that's what happens. And do you feel that that's kind of what this is.
Speaker 2:That's exactly what it is.
Speaker 3:Six years, the burden's still there, but it's not as potent as it was, as it was, because I even said you had told me you know that your daughter, you're, you're like, you know she, she doesn't have that fight in her as much as she used to, yeah, and it's like you want her to have it but you don't want her to have it right. Like you want her, but you don't want her to be angry still, you know, and not be able to sleep and be, you know, like, I guess not be able to continue day after day.
Speaker 1:You know what I'm thinking about and I don't know your daughter, but I'm thinking about she's nine when this happened. She's in her growing years and she's going to develop into the person she's going to be, and she didn't even get that chance.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah, she had to grow up.
Speaker 1:She had to grow up. Yeah, and not even grow up, just kind of grow through yeah.
Speaker 2:Not even grow up. Yeah right, she just had to go through Endure. Yeah, deal with it. Yeah, that's the bad thing about it.
Speaker 1:Because she's not developing into the person she needs to be. Because there's no closure.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she was robbed of, you know, feeling safe. She was robbed of, you know, god, every time I take her to disneyland, that's one thing that I have to avoid is is the fireworks. The fireworks show, you know, and every time it goes are you kidding me? We have to, like I have, like you know, your phones, the, the ones that you take to a shooting range. She'll wear those, and now it's starting to get better.
Speaker 2:But now, man, I remember the happiest place on earth and we can which, by the way, disney has, has always helped us out. They found out the very first time when it all happened and they, you know they've taken care of us shout out to disney yeah, they, they would get us our hotel room and one of the fireworks would go off. They'd be like. You guys are welcome to watch it on the top floor with us. Food and snacks and drinks are all included. They helped out.
Speaker 3:They helped out a lot, and this is a small window into one of the many families, right? And can you imagine when he takes his kids on vacation that they put on gun range sound silencing headphones? And you told me she has to be pretty far away because if she smells that, yeah, it triggers her. She smells that gunpowder. It's just you know what I mean. It just takes her back.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and my daughter, she bolts Like if a firework goes off she just runs and starts crying. We were at a oh my God, yeah, that was disneyland. It was like maybe three years ago and we were walking by a big thunder mountain you know how that hits right by the river.
Speaker 3:Yeah, right there firework went off because fantasia was going off okay and she bolts because it was at night and you turn the corner.
Speaker 2:You don't know yeah, and I remember you know instincts, you know. I grabbed her arm and I hugged her and I was like it's okay, it's okay, just calm down, it's just a firework.
Speaker 1:Oh, my God bro.
Speaker 2:And every time the baboom would go off, she'd like you can feel her tense up and I'm like this is okay, it's okay, we're just going to have to my daughter with my PTSD.
Speaker 3:Yeah, I was going to say on a side note does that help you with yours knowing you're helping somebody else? You're helping somebody else.
Speaker 2:And I think I'm not a big religious person I do believe in everyone's religion. I believe that they all have a right.
Speaker 1:You're saying you're not a big faith guy like me. I have faith, I have faith.
Speaker 2:But I'm not. I respect your religion. You're not Arnie. I'm not Arnie, no, but I do believe that things happen for a reason. I do believe that I got PTSD for that reason, so that way I can help my daughter out with hers. Oh, absolutely.
Speaker 1:That's what we go through. Whenever we go through in life, we help somebody else. Yeah, so you go through in life, we have somebody else.
Speaker 2:Yeah, so you know I, I could tell my daughter whenever a trigger goes through, anxiety happens, I. I see it like you know. It sounds funny. I see it like a superpower because when everyone's freaking out, I already know where all the exits are I know I don't panic, I know exactly what to do. Yeah, so I see it as a super and that's something I'm trying to get my daughter to understand, hey one thing that's going to happen to your daughter is going to.
Speaker 1:She's going to be super, super, super strong. And I mean that because any, any kind of painful thing, any kind of traumatic thing. I've gone through so much to myself and I've gotten stronger and stronger and people are like dude.
Speaker 1:I can't believe you've been through all that too, and and people ask me all the time, how do you get through this? You know, first of all, faith and then, secondly, all the pain. It's like carrying a ton of rocks and then, all of a sudden, you don't feel like you're carrying the rocks anymore, but they're still there. It's just that you've gotten stronger and then it just doesn't feel like you're carrying them anymore. But that's, that's the strength that's going to help your daughter, help somebody else as well. So, yeah, I yeah, I'm sorry to mean to cut you- off and she's had tremendous support.
Speaker 3:And I know you mentioned like Disneyland, but here talk about there's a biker. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, the Guardians of the Children, yeah, okay, I know, arnie doesn't know who they are, so tell Arnie. And the rest of El Paso, and the rest of El Paso so that they can take that stigma away from some of the bikers.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the Guardians. They really helped out Caitlin A buddy of mine, dale Churchill. He's the one that suggested Caitlin being adopted by this group and ever since that happened they said, yeah, most definitely, they took her in. They have little events where they all get together. They're child advocates Whenever they go to court and, let's say, the child feels scared to talk about the person that did them wrong, whatever reason they show up to court, so that way the kids can feel safe, knowing that they're right there. They have them right there, you know, watching over them. Wow, so you know every time we go to court.
Speaker 3:What a great name, oh yeah and if you see these guys, I mean they're oh yeah, I mean they're back and they they adopted her. She's got her own um like her own cut.
Speaker 2:Yeah, her own cut her own patches and and they go to like her, her swim meets. Yeah, I remember I went to one of the swim meets, arnie, and they're all there yeah, oh yeah, they're always there watching over and it's, it's, it's great, it's great to have that support, you know, um we're gonna tag them, definitely for this podcast, of course yeah, um, yeah.
Speaker 2:Every time we go to court they're always there with us. And you know, the first thing I remember is, every time we exit out the courtroom, the press would just rush us and they're there pushing them off the wall, they're like wow, they're like don't talk to them, let them through.
Speaker 3:And I remember that day you called me like hey, I know that guy, you saw me on tv absolutely and you see the, the guardians, right there just helping us get through so talk about what just happened a couple of weeks ago. The DA goes on TV and he says you know, I know I campaigned for this and but I spoke to all the families you had already known You'd already gotten a phone call who they?
Speaker 3:called Stephanie, who Like who calls the DA called Stephanie and says this is what we're doing. Yeah, Did you guys?
Speaker 2:talk about it afterwards. Uh, you know I was, you know I'm mad, I was mad, I was devastated.
Speaker 3:Call you, text you, or is it like a dinner conversation? Oh, you're right there.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she told me, well, you know they're. They're not going for death after all. And I was like, wow, like if that was the case, we should have done that from the very beginning I.
Speaker 1:I almost said a bad word, sorry, oh, my bad.
Speaker 3:I'm sorry.
Speaker 1:No, I almost said a bad word. Oh, I thought I said it and I don't do that.
Speaker 3:No, because it's I mean, if you like, I said, like we've been saying if you guys can see Arnie he, I can see my face. I see you and you're so wide-eyed.
Speaker 1:You see me right, Dude? I can't even close my eyes, yeah.
Speaker 2:And then you know, it's just that's how I felt. I felt like we should have.
Speaker 3:that was the case, because that could have happened during COVID yeah, If you're just going to give him a pass, and by all means nobody interpret that as like we're giving him a pass- yeah. But what all means? Nobody interpret that as like we're giving him a pass. Yeah, but what do you and I talk about? Our tax dollars are keeping him alive. We're feeding him three times a day. We're giving him a bed. We're giving him. You know what I mean, you know, and we're giving him protection.
Speaker 2:He's by himself, right, oh yeah and he's gonna be by himself for the rest of his life. He's in solitary right for the rest of his and some people say you know, you know, oh, he's going to be tortured every you know. There's some crazy people out there like Manson, right. Manson said oh, if you had asked him, how was your prison life? And he goes oh, it was a great time of my life.
Speaker 3:Yeah, he got married a couple of times, I think you know yeah, exactly. And it's just like no, come on them, just get them out of the way, get it done with, call it a day and so let's play the devil's advocate. What are people saying that wanted to spare his life? Do we know anything who don't don't like the death penalty? Do you guys know any any? I, I haven't heard anything now.
Speaker 2:Well, you know, some people are saying that. You know, like, like I was saying right now is that he's going to live there, for you know, being being tortured right by himself. You know, that's what I've been hearing so let him die a slow death and I don't agree with that I don't either it's a waste of our money. You know, and don't get me wrong.
Speaker 3:Yet death, uh, death cases, death cases like he's not the only one.
Speaker 2:Yeah right, it is expensive it's more expensive than keeping a person alive, in death or in prison for the rest of their life.
Speaker 1:This is not a wrongful accusation. This is cut and dry and I'm not about killing anybody.
Speaker 3:I'm just saying, if that's the law, that's the law and I know that for a fact that you are not about that. You know what I mean, but it's just one of those things. Is it a little mind-boggling when you think about everything in time that was wasted? Yeah, why did we go through all this if they were always? Because I'm sure the defense was never going to ask for the death penalty, right, his defense.
Speaker 2:I think this was their plan was to Wait it out, just wait it out until everyone gets tired. And here we are. You know this is not an insurance claim, but they're still getting paycheck.
Speaker 3:you know they're getting a paycheck, waiting all those years so how many levels of of court did you have to wait because you told me there was there's two.
Speaker 2:Right, there was a there was the federal one, which was I think it was two years ago now was it two years ago, I don't even remember how many and what is that? So so, like here we have the state case okay, that's the one that we were asking for, the death penalty because it happened in texas, yeah, and then federal. You know the most they can get is life. Okay, that's. You know that's rare that you see federal cases go for death penalty.
Speaker 3:And because it makes it federal, because it's a murder, because it's a mass.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I don't know the jurisdiction on that. I know it was because it was considered domestic terrorism. I think that's what it was, and it was also a hate crime.
Speaker 3:Oh, hate crime, okay, so that's why that's what takes it to the federal level. Yeah, I believe that's why that's what takes it to the federal level.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I believe that's why that all happened and they were done right away.
Speaker 3:It's, you know, in and out like okay, okay, they're doing and did that seem like a positive momentum at the time, like, okay, we're, we're heading in the right direction.
Speaker 2:Next one, slam dunk yeah, that's how I felt. That's how I felt, at least. It's like okay, we got the federal one out of the way, here comes the state. This is the one we're getting.
Speaker 3:This is the cakewalk.
Speaker 2:This is the one, yeah. Cakewalk, you would think, yeah, I mean if you're going to jump in the pool and say, well, I don't, you know, and that's what I had thought is, boom, we're gonna be done with this in a year and then that's it. We can get over it. Oh my god, yeah. And then delay, and then another delay. How's your wife doing? You know what she's. She's strong, she's very strong. For you know, if you look at her, you won't.
Speaker 3:Yeah, you know, just a regular yeah you would never know um what she's going what she's going through and that that's a huge credit to Stephanie, yeah Is that you meet her and you would never know that she's, you know, started off with a PTSD husband, you know, and then from there she lost her father. She's dealing, you know, with her mother and her daughter. You never see it from her.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and Steph man, she deserves all the credit because she's the rock. She's the rock in this situation. I'm just the wall at this point.
Speaker 1:Nah, dude, you're more than that.
Speaker 2:Trust me, you're more than that. But yeah, Stephanie, she's been super strong. We've had our ups and downs during this whole thing.
Speaker 1:Of course, even if this didn't happen, you'd have ups and downs.
Speaker 2:Yeah, but she gets everything. She takes care of her mom. She quit her job so she can take care of her mom. Doesn't get paid for it, of course. Quit her job, takes care of the girls, caitlin whenever she needs to go to therapy.
Speaker 2:David, when he passed away, you know we took the car. You know he left it to us. Yeah, you know we paid off the car and it was brand new. David had just gotten it, maybe less than a year, didn't get to really enjoy it. All this happened. You know we took the car. That car is going to go to Caitlin when she's old enough to drive, so she already has a car. But you know all the driving that Stephanie's done and she's put a lot of miles on that sucker, you know. I think it's like close to hitting to 50,000 and we got it at maybe 400 miles. So all that and that's all that driving around here in the city just taking her mom to her appointments, taking Caitlin appointments, going to her mom's house for her medicines, taking care of her mom to her appointments, taking Caitlin appointments, going to her mom's house for her medicines, taking care of her mom.
Speaker 3:It's just, you know I don't know how Stephanie does it Now. Do you think if she was ever asked to do an interview, would she do it?
Speaker 2:no, yeah, most definitely absolutely especially if it's if it's for you guys.
Speaker 1:Yeah, most definitely should do it. Well, we're not doing it. For me, this is not right?
Speaker 3:yeah, this is like an informative and you know the gag order. You and I had talked about it, but we would never really discuss like the impact. Yeah, you know, on stuff that you guys just could not say anything, mm-hmm, because they hold you in contempt, right yeah?
Speaker 2:Pretty much I mean, but I doubt it. If it took them six years to get to where they're at, I'm pretty sure they'd be like well, we'll get to the raw old case later, because you spoke out.
Speaker 3:Right.
Speaker 2:I'm pretty sure they wouldn't have done anything, but they would make an example of yeah, sure, how about of me? Yeah, yeah, that's crazy, of course. Yes, can you imagine?
Speaker 3:yeah not being able to talk about you know I mean something as as tragic in your life. You know, and like I know arnie talks about, he's had some really big, you know, tragics. Yeah, also a strong person, thank you. His twin brother passed away, but imagine he wouldn't, you could talk about it well, he passed away.
Speaker 1:the same day my first wife passed away Four years after her.
Speaker 3:And they told you if you talk about that, we're going to lock you up. I can't talk about my twin brother.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that'd drive me crazy.
Speaker 3:Because that's a little bit of therapy. That's my life actually.
Speaker 2:That's a good point, Nathan. That's how I get through my btsd.
Speaker 3:I talk about it that's what they tell me. I mean that's literally that's yeah.
Speaker 2:The thing to do is talk about yeah and I'm pretty sure you've heard my stories left and right and you're probably tired of them already, but you know what it helps out.
Speaker 3:It's gotta help.
Speaker 2:Yeah, it does a lot, you know. And yeah, like that's the thing, I'm pretty sure stephanie would would be more than willing to come down here. I'll talk to her see what she says. Pretty sure, stephanie would be more than willing to come down here. I'll talk to her see what she says. Pretty sure she'd be.
Speaker 1:Well, let her hear this episode and see what she thinks. There you go, yeah. Yeah, I think she'll like it, of course, but I hope El Paso likes this. I hope the rest of the nation loves this because, like I said, we're on a pretty big syndicate here. We're pretty 114 cities in the United States and throughout the world, actually 12 countries.
Speaker 3:So on that note. If anybody wants to come, yeah, come on down, because Arnie's had everybody from you know, miss El Paso, to you know, like entrepreneurs and now Children's book authors Children yeah. And you know, everybody has a story to tell. For those of you who don't think that you have one or there's no impact, somebody out there has a story to tell. We just want to help people, that's it, and inform them, because I know today you're like a sponge.
Speaker 1:Yeah, you see me. It's like I'm learning. This is life university right here, absolutely.
Speaker 2:There's a lot more to the story.
Speaker 1:We can keep on going. My shows are usually like 30 minutes, but we're already at the 50-minute mark and I don't care.
Speaker 2:No, I don't care. I hope I'm not overstepping anything.
Speaker 1:No, I don't know. This is important. Like Nathan is seeing me right now, I'm floored. I can't believe all this is important. Like Nathan is seeing me right now, I'm floored. I just I can't believe all this is happening. Oh yeah, in the order that it is, you know.
Speaker 2:You know so many people have helped us out. You know, throughout this journey. You know Nathan number one helped us out. He's gotten real close to my family, you know and you know. Thank you again for letting me be in your wedding man, I do appreciate that.
Speaker 3:We've all you know we've all been to Disneyland together. Maybe we give them enough shout outs.
Speaker 2:you know, let's fly these guys down here one more time. You know the Patriots. You know they reached out to us Like me, and my daughter got to go see a Patriots game.
Speaker 3:You know got to meet Robert Kraft.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I didn't get to say hi to Tom Brady. I waved at him but we didn't get to say hi to him. Wow, the goat. Wow. But I know I can smell his head and shoulders from where. I was at I thought I was on the field. We got to watch the game. It was pretty good. That's so funny.
Speaker 3:Now, is there anybody or anything that you're disappointed in? Not just that or any thing that you're not, that you're disappointed and not just maybe the da can we talk about walmart. Do you guys still go to walmart? I'm sure there's a lot of people that want to know. Right, do you guys still go to?
Speaker 2:walmart, you know that's the thing is that I've always told my daughter, you know, we gotta face our fears, we gotta, you know, go through them head on, head on. Yeah, we do go to walmart. At first it was hard not.
Speaker 1:Yeah, not the same one, yeah not the same one, right?
Speaker 2:I still haven't not even near that parking lot, never been like going to the mall.
Speaker 1:It's like Jesus Christ, it's right, you could see the gunshots, um that went into the, the concrete, how they covered them up. It's a different shade of gray, oh really yeah, I didn't know that you know the way we talk about it impacted people involved.
Speaker 3:I'm gonna tell you a side note on my fiancee. She won't go to that walmart and she's not, has no connection, nothing related. She's not even one of those people that you know I was going to be there that day.
Speaker 2:You know, I hear that a lot, do you hear?
Speaker 1:that a lot.
Speaker 2:Oh, I was. I was going to be there, but you know does that bug?
Speaker 3:you I was like and then something stopped me, right?
Speaker 1:yeah, I hear that a lot Do you hear that a lot.
Speaker 2:Oh, I was going to be there, but Does that bug you? And then something stopped me. I hear that a lot. It's like well, it bugs me If you're there you're there.
Speaker 3:It's one of those You're like really Really she won't go because she has that image that at one point there was just so many bodies, like you said, that had to lay there because it becomes a crime scene For weeks. And then she kind of in her head says and then they just cleaned it up. Clean up on aisle three, right Through rollback signs back up there and I know that's let Google back and forth all day. You know what I mean. Like there had to have been employees that needed that job right.
Speaker 3:That are still working there, that were grateful that they have a job now, that they reopened it and clearly you know the community is there, but you know Walmart's kind of poking their yeah, yeah, you know what's on this end right.
Speaker 2:You know, and I feel like they've helped out maybe a little bit. You know, putting a memorial up, that's not enough. You know, like there was no, like they didn't take care of their customers, man Right.
Speaker 3:You know, and is that the next step? Are you allowed to talk about?
Speaker 2:that you know, and is that the next step? Are you allowed to talk about no? No, nothing yet about that I'll keep you up.
Speaker 3:Let me talk to steph about that, okay all right, so we'll I should have. I should have asked her, but I didn't ask well, I don't want to say anything, we'll keep that part out yeah, um, that where I worked at the first convenience bank, which is inside the walmart's.
Speaker 1:I used to be a branch manager, one of the branches and uh, I heard that those employees ran right into the safe area in the bank. Very smart.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and you know that when you're saying that, about that one kid that ran in telling everyone, hey, there's a shooter, and they closed that gate right in front of them. That's what I've heard. Right, wow, and we'll know when those videos start coming out when those videos come out.
Speaker 3:But they had practiced, I mean just like a fire drill in a school come out, but they had practiced. I mean just like a fire drill in a school right, there were things that could have been prevented.
Speaker 2:You know, from what I've heard, is that or seen actually that there was no Walmart employee that was injured or killed?
Speaker 2:And there's a reason, there's a reason this is what my daughter tells me, and my mother-in-law told me the same thing is that when everything started going down, they were on one of the cashiers next to the self-checkout. And my daughter says that the cashier said I'll be right back, the scanner's not working, and left. Well, it turns out from what I've heard I don't know if this is true or not, but that they had got like a code blue or something like that, and they, the employees, probably thought, oh, this is a drill, just a regular drill. All right, let's do whatever. And when they had told that to my father-in-law hey, the scanner's not working, we'll be right back. It's like whoa, wait a minute. They said that they had time. You be right back. It's like whoa, wait a minute. They said that they had time you know my father-in-law could have been alive to communicate that too.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. So I don't know how much of that is true, but you know it's not the first.
Speaker 3:I've heard it like three, three four, but this is what should come out. Yeah, you know, with the videos and the yeah, it's like you could have saved people.
Speaker 2:Oh, my god could have saved people. You know, my father-in-law was at that cashier area. Guy came in, started shooting people, grabbed my daughter and my mother and put them underneath the little section where the, I guess the cashier stands, and he got shot and he fell. As he fell he covered the view of the gunman from that cashier area and that's why my daughter, my mother-in-law, didn't die that day, because his body covered up that area. And that's when I noticed how much my daughter really saw.
Speaker 3:And he's our hero.
Speaker 2:Yeah of course.
Speaker 1:They don't all wear capes, like they say.
Speaker 3:So that's how they survived. He pushed them where the cashier would have been Mm-hmm, and from what we're, I think, eventually going to find out, they all left because they were warned.
Speaker 2:Yeah.
Speaker 1:Somebody's going to make trouble, yeah.
Speaker 2:I mean make trouble, and that's the sad thing is that whatever policy they that, whatever policy they have that could have saved lives, could have instead of being 23 now it was 22 that day, but 23 now, you know it could have been less. You know, that's just one of those things, man, it's just, it's really rough Right Now.
Speaker 3:You had mentioned that she still goes to therapy every thursday, from nine years old to 15.
Speaker 2:Yeah, she's 15 now. She's gonna be 15 in may now, who pays for that? If you don't want me to ask I believe that the city is the one that takes care of that.
Speaker 3:I think there's a fun that the yeah, when all this was going on, there were so many fundraisers. I don't. You guys that will never know, right how it got distributed I know khalid came in and he did a fundraiser and you know, hollywood, hollywood was donating millions. You know what I mean. I had a rinky dinky fundraiser, you know, but I you knew where it was going, and then, and then we see stuff that have hurricanes. How do you guys know You'll never?
Speaker 2:know You'll never know. I don't know where all that money is at.
Speaker 3:I know some of the funds are for that, for therapy, for whatever the kids need, but no one's handing you a check, and be like here go to Disneyland. No.
Speaker 2:Wow. So my wife's the one it would be perfect to answer that question. She's the one that would know exactly what's getting what and who's getting what.
Speaker 3:And how it would be divided. Yeah, because it's not like you guys had a meeting and said, okay, this is the treasure.
Speaker 2:No, nothing like that yeah.
Speaker 3:So somebody that's not involved and not part of it. This stinks. Wow, Arnie, there's so many webs to this Dude.
Speaker 1:I go to work every day, Hard working. Yeah, I work from home, of course, but I'm saying I work. I don't just not go to work and say I'm going to dip into this.
Speaker 3:And that person who's not involved is getting paid to to do nothing. To tell you guys what what's gonna get paid for? Yeah, so if you know, let's say bill gates that had donated like 10 million and maybe did somebody decides where it's going, when it's going, but you guys have never you know, Because people want to know.
Speaker 3:I mean, you take us back. I remember I remember all these and I just looked at you. I said I'm going to have a fundraiser because you need now money. If you know he had life insurance, If he was this or you know was had a life insurance, if he was this or you know had like a savings, all that and arnie, you'll know this.
Speaker 1:Oh yeah, it my god, you lose somebody, you lose a lot.
Speaker 3:It takes so much time to get that and file.
Speaker 3:So I said you know what you're gonna need. You're gonna need, you know, money that comes in now. You're just gonna have bills like electric. You know this, that a mortgage payment is gonna hit and they don't. You know they don't care. And you're telling me, like you know, if we were to go back, you know there was just so much. You know el paso strong stuff, millions, I mean we could probably. You know research to where that number would probably have to be and you guys never no, no, we did get some, but I don't know.
Speaker 2:Right, you don't know. I don't know exactly how much we should have gotten or how much.
Speaker 3:But nobody got together and said hey, there's this much we're distributing. We're distributing, you know.
Speaker 2:Yeah, and again my wife would be the one Right. You know she'd be like oh, I have to, exactly if you know that I should have done. But yeah, a lot of, you know a lot of the money that we've got was from David's life insurance. That took care of a lot, you know. The house was paid off. Thankfully David's house, my mother and father's house was paid off, so that got taken care of, you know, and the money that she has, I think the taxes should be paid every year.
Speaker 1:Yeah, they should be paid off.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know, and then that's. The thing is that my mother-in-law, she never worked.
Speaker 3:Never worked.
Speaker 2:Wow, wow. So her provider's gone. You know yeah, breadwinner, you know yeah, and so I think all she gets is from his social security. Yeah, I think all she gets is from his social security.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that's it. When my wife passed away, I was 44. I got a check for $281. I'm so sorry to hear that, nanny, wow. And I said is that it and they go? Yeah, until you turn 60, then you can collect 100% of her social security, which is this year, but 44, here's a check for 281 dollars.
Speaker 3:No, you know and you work, yeah, I work in, and your, your mother-in-law's never, never worked so that's not something that you just okay. Let me I mean, let me just pull up the one ads you know, the now hiring ads.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know, especially with all that.
Speaker 3:And we won't get into it, but we know that she's had a very, very hard time recovering from this.
Speaker 1:Yeah, most definitely.
Speaker 3:We haven't even talked about her, and that's a burden that I would not want for anybody.
Speaker 2:Yeah, from what you've personally told me, yeah, it's been a rollercoaster On top of your daughter on top of your wife, on top of just now resurfacing.
Speaker 1:And then, once again, this is not the only family.
Speaker 2:Right yeah, imagine what they're going through, that they weren't able to talk about.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 2:Right.
Speaker 3:Yeah, other family, I mean I just can't believe it. Other family, I mean I just I can't believe it. Other families, and then the one in, you know, mexico. You know they probably are just trying to shut them up, right, yeah, that you said that's kind of the rumor.
Speaker 2:That was the rumor. Yeah, Out of the country. I don't know why they picked them specifically, or what was going on. I guess because they were in Juarez or somewhere in Mexico where maybe the contact would have been hard to get to. Anyways, I don't know, wow. But you know, like I said, all rumors have a little bit of truth in it, so something needs to be investigated on that. No one has. I think that needs to be the more you dig, yeah, yeah, so think that that needs to be.
Speaker 3:The more you dig.
Speaker 2:Yeah, yeah. So there's that man, yeah, but you know, like I said, we're we're getting through it. We're doing our best every day. You know, I made some good friends along the way and, uh, you know we're here. Yeah, we're going to live our life, you know we're here, yeah, we're gonna live our life, man, we're gonna do our best and keep moving forward.
Speaker 3:Yeah, now, one day caitlin is gonna listen to this oh wow, and it's true. Yeah, what do you? What do you want? Your message to her, or do you want her to tell her own story?
Speaker 2:I want her to tell her own story. I I want her to get there. I know she's not there yet, but I do want her to tell her own story. Maybe, maybe not exactly what she saw, or you know in detail, you know. No of course we wouldn't want to, but I would really want her to tell her side, because she was there.
Speaker 3:It conquered her fear a little bit Wow.
Speaker 2:You know she saw a lot. You know, every once in a while I hear her say a comment. And I'm like oh wow, like what it it like? I'm like oh wow, like what? It's a little graphic, but okay, you know, she was, like, you know, one of the court states, just like, oh, we're, we're just wasting our time. She's like I saw all this and here we are, like for nothing, and she didn't say that specifically right, right, you know in detail and we're pg version, right of course, and when she said those words, I looked at her.
Speaker 2:I was like wow, you saw a lot more than you should have. She saw too much. Oh yeah, man yeah that hit me hard.
Speaker 3:She heard too much, yeah, and she saw too much, because those words are impactful to you. Yeah, when people, your veteran peers, say I've seen a lot, you know what that means.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know what that means. But when your daughter says yeah, dude, I've seen it. Yeah, she was. I think she was 12 when she said that and I was like, oh man, that's the first time she ever said anything that and she doesn't go to court with you guys, right when you guys no, um, but she did an impact statement yeah, she talked about that a little bit yeah, I, unfortunately I wasn't there for that, for that impact statement.
Speaker 2:Uh, I was out of town, I had for work and um, but from what I've, what I've heard, from what stephanie told me is that, uh, you know, she got up there, she did an impact statement. This was during the federal case. Is he there? Yeah, oh yeah, right in front of you know so he's there, yeah, and she reads her impact statement.
Speaker 2:Yeah, dude, and you know there was a, there's a, there was an article that came out and they showed like a cartoon sketch okay, you know they couldn't show my daughter's face, of course, but you see that she's there and there's a service dog with her for comfort, you know and she starts reading off. You know she goes at this guy like yelling at this guy and I wish I was there to see that and she's 12.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, she was just like letting them have it for those people that don't know what's an impact statement so, uh, whenever they have a case and they they're about to give out their verdict, at the very end the judge will allow the families who were really affected by to have an impact statement. Basically, they can say whatever they want, and you?
Speaker 3:know, just let it out like a piece of their mind. Can they c say whatever they?
Speaker 2:want and you know, just let it out Like a piece of their mind.
Speaker 3:Can they cuss, can they?
Speaker 1:Oh yeah Most definitely yeah, you see, ernie. No, I'm sorry they can cuss, it's because I want everybody to hear the show.
Speaker 2:Yeah, no, but yeah, they become, as long as they don't, you know, beat the credit of the guy. You know they can, they can say whatever they want. You know, that's probably why I wasn't there to do it, cause I would have done the old George Bush, you know, throw my shit at the guy and they scheduled it while you're out of town for a reason. Let's make sure Raul's not here, but I did write one and someone read it for me.
Speaker 3:Oh, okay, yeah, I, yeah, I wrote one. Is there another impact statement that they're going?
Speaker 2:to do or no? Yes, from what I've been told, it's that they will have another impact statement.
Speaker 3:Okay, so maybe that's where I'm confused. So you're going to be at that one as well, right? Yeah, almost definitely.
Speaker 2:I already got the time off from work and I'm going to be there.
Speaker 3:no-transcript and you look at the lighter, the brighter and lighter side of life, you know.
Speaker 2:So I'll bring it in and I'll try to make it pgs friendly so that way it's that was a little bit easier to hear out here, but yeah, yeah, like I said, my daughter was just and she'll be doing another impact statement I don't know I'm, I think she, she was talking about that, she was thinking about it, but I don't know if she will.
Speaker 3:I think, uh, that one time, just to let it out yeah, it was good enough, but I don't want to see him. I don't want to see him again. Maybe that's where she's at right now.
Speaker 2:Yeah, you know that's crazy when you said that, Because I had never seen the guy even during everything happened, the news I just blocked it all out. It wasn't for the very first time that we saw him in court and I looked at Stephanie. I was like this grunny guy did this. I was like man, it's crazy, this little puny guy did all this like it's ridiculous.
Speaker 3:It seemed like unreal. Yeah, because you were, let's be honest, a trained, you know military, all of that, and this guy, just you know, video gamed it together and drove nine, ten hours.
Speaker 2:It's crazy, man, like it's just crazy, how someone, just who looks like that, would do something like this dude. And you know it's funny when you're saying that, because I just remember that, uh, it was that same one of those court hearings is that, like I said, remember, I told you I can see the faces. I know the families that are there, I know what they look like. There was this one couple that I just didn't know who they were and I think that was his mom and dad. I really think that because we never saw him again, but they got in there.
Speaker 2:Yeah, the only family members were allowed in there. And again, I don't know who they are. I've never seen them again.
Speaker 3:Do they get interviewed?
Speaker 2:No, From what I hear they were getting threats from people that knew them.
Speaker 3:So they had to up and leave. Because another to say you know, I'm not trying to one way or another, but another simple family, right, they're just suburb, suburban family. Yeah, I don't know their kid right.
Speaker 2:yeah, you know, and that's one thing in my impact statement, the first one that I wrote, I wrote something like that that you know, no one's born with hate, it's taught. And I was like, and honestly, I believe your mother and father should be here on trial with you. Because, that's what I said, well, my letter that they read Because it's true, like Learned behavior. Yeah, he learned that somewhere. You know it's not manifested in one day to the next, it's not.
Speaker 3:And even if they are typical Joneses, they didn't have their eye on their kid.
Speaker 2:How do you not know that?
Speaker 1:an.
Speaker 2:AK-47 is getting delivered at your house. It comes in a box, it's huge.
Speaker 3:You could probably tell me what's in your daughter's third drawer yeah, all her artwork.
Speaker 2:Good yeah, all her artwork. Good point, all her artwork.
Speaker 3:You know what I mean. Like you've got to be involved.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:If that's a message, what you would like to say to other parents.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah, I'm not saying you know, hover over your kids, you know, don't be a helicopter, but you know get involved, get involved in their lives, know what they're doing, know what friends they have.
Speaker 1:Dude, my parents knew who my friends were. They knew exactly what I was about, and I turned out to be a pretty good kid.
Speaker 2:Yeah, I mean yeah, my parents here and there too, you know they let me go out and about do my own thing, but they knew I wasn't going to be in trouble or be doing drugs. You know, I think the worst thing I did was skateboarding and racing my car, but that was back in the day. Don't do that no more. Yeah, but yeah, you know my parents. You know they were strict. My parents were strict, very, very strict.
Speaker 1:Same here man. Twelve years of Catholic private school.
Speaker 2:That's very strict, no, but yeah, get involved with your kids. You know, you know. Take them out every, every weekend, see what's going on, hang out with them, Hug them.
Speaker 1:Yeah, love them.
Speaker 2:There you go, love them, cause I think that's what happened with him.
Speaker 1:I guess this really impacts me because I don't have any kids of my own. I have stepkids from my first marriage, my first wife that passed away, but I don't have kids of my own.
Speaker 1:And people say it's different when you have your own kids, and I believe it. I've loved my step kids as well, like they're mine, but they still call me for money, but I don't know. They're good kids and now they're in their 40s and they got their own kids. But this has been an impactful show. I want to say I'm blown, blown away.
Speaker 3:Well, thanks, Ernie, because you didn't hesitate to shy away from what you were trying to build, your Chuko Chuckle.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:You said you know what I think we should bring Raul on, and it's a small piece of that puzzle or window of everybody.
Speaker 1:Because everybody's head loss, like we talked about, and I knew we were going to have a grieving episode somewhere down the line. But today I've just been blown away with tragic loss and how it impacts families.
Speaker 3:And six years of a gag order. I still think that's, you know, ridiculous.
Speaker 1:It is my work.
Speaker 3:I don't Living in fear a little bit.
Speaker 2:I mean I didn't see the point of that gag order. I mean, who's it going to hurt? Who's it going to hurt anyone?
Speaker 3:Right. Why would information hurt anybody?
Speaker 2:Yeah, and I think someone out there knows, and that's probably why they put that gag order. I mean, who knows now? Maybe they can talk about it now and they just don't want to. But whoever that is, if they're listening, I hope they shed a little bit of light on this controversy that we've been hearing.
Speaker 1:Well, I just I kind of foresee a big payday somewhere.
Speaker 3:I'm just saying, yeah, it's a lot of layers, a lot of layers to this, and the sad thing is it's really not over. Yeah, no.
Speaker 1:And it's never going to bring your father-in-law back For any family. It's never going to bring your father-in-law back either. That's the saddest part.
Speaker 2:That's the roughest part. Right, that's it.
Speaker 1:Yeah, that's the sad thing, I do want to thank you for coming on the show.
Speaker 2:Raul, Thank you.
Speaker 1:Speaking with Raul Melendez and Nate Valenzuela. I had a very small part in this interview, but I'm glad to step back today. On Chucco Chuckle, I want to thank you for joining us today Once again. Very, very heavy, heavy topic today, but, uh, I hope you guys enjoy it. Uh, share it with anybody you want to, please Anybody's going to impact uh or help Uh, but don't forget to subscribe to the show. And uh, thanks for joining me on Choco Choco. Thanks guys, appreciate you. Thank you, love you guys. Love you too. Bud, love you too. Love you too. Thank you, thank you.