Transforming Struggles into Strength: Jay Washington on Confidence and Planning

🎙️ Welcome to another empowering episode of the Timeless Vitality podcast. 

👔 In this powerful episode, co-hosts Kate Beck & Amber Stitt are joined by special guest Jay Washington for an enlightening conversation about overcoming life's challenges, building confidence, navigating societal expectations, and the vital importance of planning for life's uncertainties. 

👨‍👧‍👦 Jay shares deeply personal experiences of loss and resilience, specifically stepping into a father-figure role for his niece and nephew after the passing of his sister in early 2020. 

📝 This episode is a heartfelt reminder of the importance of planning for life's uncertainties, from financial security to emotional well-being. 

Episode Highlights:

🔹 Jay Washington's Confidence Journey: Discover how Jay overcame societal expectations and stereotypes in the financial sales industry to find his unique "North Star," guiding him to freedom and authenticity.

🔹 Community Engagement: Learn about Jay's commitment to giving back through his involvement with organizations like the Junior Achievement of Delaware Darrelle Revis Foundation, the Jamaur Law Foundation, and the G Collective Art Foundation.

🔹 Fashion as Creative Expression: Jay's distinctive style is more than just fashion; it's a call for everyone to own their style choices confidently.

🔹 Emotional Intelligence and Leadership: Dive into discussions about the importance of emotional intelligence in children, how parents can encourage emotional expression, and the role of self-awareness in leadership.

🔹 Personal and Professional Growth: Jay shares a heartfelt story about becoming a father figure to his niece and nephew after his sister's passing and balancing this new responsibility with his career at LeafHouse Financial.

🔹 Preparation for Life’s Uncertainties: Highlighting the importance of preparing for unexpected events, Jay emphasizes organizing one’s affairs to relieve family members from unforeseen burdens.

🔹 Legacy and Long-Term Planning: Amber, Kate, and Jay discuss the significance of long-term planning and creating a timeless legacy.

🔹 Interpersonal Dynamics and Networking: The episode also dives into the balance between extroversion and introversion, the key to effective networking, and maintaining a professional yet personal touch in your career.

📽️ To watch this podcast: https://youtu.be/q_spvcuXvTQ

📻 Tune in for this inspiring conversation on the Timeless Vitality podcast and don't miss out on the wisdom and personal stories shared by all of our incredible guests.

🔗 CONNECT WITH US:

📲 Jay Washington on LinkedIn:

📲 Jay Washington

📲 Timeless Vitality Website:

📲 www.Timeless-Vitality.com

✨ Stay vibrant, stay empowered, and continue creating your timeless legacy! ✨

#TimelessVitalityPodcast #PathwaysWithAmberStitt #LongTermPlanning #JayWashington #KateBeck #AmberStitt #PDXInsurance #StittStrategies

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Transcript

Kate Beck [00:00:03]:
Welcome to the Timeless Vitality podcast, where co-hosts Kate Beck and Amber Stitt explore the unique journeys, inspiring stories, and timeless wisdom of those who embody vitality and resilience.

Amber Stitt [00:00:17]:
Together, we discover what it means to thrive well beyond 100, sharing insights that empower you to live with purpose and create a lasting legacy.

Kate Beck [00:00:27]:
Let's get started with today's episode. Hello and welcome to the Timeless Vitality podcast. My name is Kate Beck, and I'm your host. And joining me is Amber Stitt.

Amber Stitt [00:00:38]:
Welcome.

Kate Beck [00:00:40]:
Today we have Jay Washington on the show. Jay, hello. Introduce yourself. Tell us a little bit about yourself and your role.

Jay Washington [00:00:48]:
Thank you, Kate. First off, I want to say thank you for having me, because when you have a podcast and you invite someone, that's love, because this is your artistic expression. And so to share that with me and have me be on, incredibly grateful. I am a sales director at Leaf House Financial, which is the largest independent 3(38) advisor. 3(38), we monitor investment menus to make sure they meet the investment policy statement, and our goal is to help our clients build an appropriate retirement plan menu, which really ties into my long-term and my overall, what really drives me. And that is better participant outcomes in the retirement plan industry, which I am celebrating. I can't believe I'm saying this,

Jay Washington [00:01:31]:
24 and a half years in the retirement plan industry, and probably another 40 to go, because when you love what you do, you don't work a day in your life.

Kate Beck [00:01:42]:
Oh, my goodness, I love that intro. Yes, 100%. So, Jay, tell us a little bit about whether it's personal, or professional, I would love to hear about a challenge that you may have recently, or in the past overcame, and how it led to a pearl of wisdom.

Jay Washington [00:02:00]:
I would love to share that, and it's actually personal, but also ties into the professional. You know, 2020 was tough for all of us, especially most of us, that had to deal with the pandemic. Covid you factor into that. In the very beginning of the year, actually, before the country shut down, we lost my sister, my youngest sister. I was my mom's only child for almost ten years, and then my sister came along and she materially changed my life then. And fast forward 35 years later, she changed my life even more drastically when she passed away unexpectedly, leaving behind two children that I was the doting uncle to. You know, the funcle. And overnight really became their father figure as I co-parent them with my mother. I have to give all the props in the world to my mom because she has them on a day to day basis, and we live about 300 miles apart, but, you know, via FaceTime.

Jay Washington [00:02:58]:
And I've been very blessed that I've had employers and managers who understand the importance that they play in my life that make it so that I can get to them when I need to. And I spend probably about a week to a week and a half every month with them. And when I said that, although that's personal, it bled into my professional, in that prior to that, I was almost like a prodigal son. And I won't say I was completely disconnected from my family, but I wasn't prioritizing being with and visiting them all the time. And my life was really about me. And as much as I thought that my life was fantastic and that it had everything it needed, I look back now and I realized that I was directionless. So between the pandemic, navigating this new chapter of basically being a father, everything I knew was changing and different. And as we all know, change, especially drastic change, is constant, but also never easy.

Jay Washington [00:03:55]:
And as I began to change and evolve, you know, you can't resist it, because when you look at two children who really need you, you just kind of figure it out. And I realized that despite thinking I had everything in my life, I lacked a North Star. And what I realized is that those children became a North Star. And as that began to change my personal life, it also changed my professional life, in that I started to realize these children need an example to look up to. These children need someone who is going to be comfortable financially to take care of them as they navigate and get older. I need to make sure that my career is on an upward trajectory. And I remember that first company I interviewed with after becoming a father figure. And I've never so boldly told someone about my family situation and said, "They're my number one priority.

Jay Washington [00:04:44]:
I need to be able to get to them. We are a package deal. I really love this position, but if that's going to be an issue, then we can carry on separately from here on out." It was incredibly empowering. And ever since then, I've seen, no matter what loss or what challenge I incur, it may be difficult in the very beginning, but I can find something beautiful in it to grow from and keep the upward trajectory.

Kate Beck [00:05:12]:
Goodness. Well, that's empowerment at its best. How did it feel to face big money and employment straight on and just say exactly what you mean?

Jay Washington [00:05:25]:
It felt right. And it felt right because it was from the heart and I meant it. And if I saw where, let's say we accepted a job, (thankfully, it didn't happen this way), and I didn't see that being delivered, then I would have left. Because as I realized by having and finding a North Star, you don't want to stay somewhere that isn't true to what you believe in and what you need to be a whole person. So it felt empowering, for the first time in my life, to really stand up for myself and say, this is what I want. And if you can deliver on that, then I can deliver the results that you'll want.

Amber Stitt [00:06:00]:
Thank you for sharing that. I mean, some people, maybe the kids, maybe it's something else that is the North Star and we have to be true to ourselves and then loving what you do, we've talked about that a lot. But if you're not in the right spot, if it doesn't make sense, it's almost like a duty to ourselves to make sure we find that place. Or, you're almost interviewing them in a sense of like, is this going to work and be a partnership, be reciprocating? And if you're not having that balance, it's not always like that, but it sounds like we should be demanding more of that for ourselves and having that excellence, because that can truly make us happier. And there's some legacy there.

Jay Washington [00:06:33]:
Absolutely. I've had many people tell me that when you know what you want out of life, just as you said, Amber, when you're interviewing, you're also interviewing that company to make sure that you're going to be mutually beneficial for each other.

Amber Stitt [00:06:47]:
So with your sister and you think about what people are not planning for, not to say your sister did or didn't do certain steps, but if you could talk to the 40 year-old person, whether it's a parent or not, is there anything through your journey that you've experienced that you just hope and wish people took more seriously?

Jay Washington [00:07:07]:
Especially when there are children involved, have your plans written. Thankfully, my mother has been very involved with the kids and it was a no brainer. And they've actually, since they lost their mother, they also lost their father, as well. So by the time they were 11, I'm sorry, 10 and 14, they were essentially orphans. Thankfully, my mother and I have always been heavily involved. Not everyone has that. Have your wishes written out. The other thing I tell people is, GoFundMe is not life insurance.

Amber Stitt [00:07:42]:
Yes.

Jay Washington [00:07:42]:
In the event that you pass away, make sure at the very minimum that your family can take care of your final expenses. What are the two things we have to do? Die and pay taxes. You can cheat your taxes. You can never cheat death.

Amber Stitt [00:08:00]:
Yep.

Jay Washington [00:08:00]:
Prepare.

Amber Stitt [00:08:01]:
Is there something very specific about your mother that might stand out or shine among people in her population, her demographic, age? Because we didn't really talk much about her, but it sounds like she's pretty amazing to be able to take this on. Not that she wouldn't, but it's almost like she's a unique character in the story.

Jay Washington [00:08:19]:
She is. When my mother loves, she loves unconditionally and selflessly, and it was a no brainer. And, I mean, we're talking about a woman who hadn't had elementary school children, during a pandemic, schooling them at home in 20 plus years. And I will say, whether you believe in God, whether you believe in the universe, everything happens for a reason. I went home to my mother's to be with the kids for my sister's birthday, which was March 13, 2020, and I was actually supposed to go to a wedding in Mexico. Covid was kicking up, and my buddy told me, he said, "I'd love to see your face at the wedding, but I feel like your heart is with the kids. Go be with them." The state of Pennsylvania shut down that weekend, so I went home for a weekend and was home for four months.

Amber Stitt [00:09:07]:
Wow.

Jay Washington [00:09:08]:
And my mother had been telling me everything was fine.

Jay Washington [00:09:11]:
And that she was handling everything well. This is a woman who lost a child and never got the grieve. And so, thankfully, I was able to be there for four months to reconnect with my family and to really get hands on with them. And so even as she was struggling to contain her grief, to be now less grandmother and more mother to those kids, I just...I thank God for her because I don't know if I could have done what she did. I've never buried a child.

Amber Stitt [00:09:45]:
Yeah. Thank you for sharing that.

Jay Washington [00:09:47]:
Thank you.

Kate Beck [00:09:47]:
Thank you for sharing that. And I think I want to add on to that, because I think you pinned a really important topic of grieving. Okay, yes, we just completely looked over the fact that here is a woman who lost a child. And also she's learning how to adapt to 2020 technology and provide education to children and the importance of grieving for your own self, so that you can show up. The loss of your child, the loss of what you thought was going to be your lifestyle, all of these things that are now adapted and changing. That's amazing.

Kate Beck [00:10:27]:
Thank you very much for sharing that.

Amber Stitt [00:10:28]:
But Kate, that touches on the planning. He's saying, get it done, because we can't predict the next thing, so we can't hide from it. And, Kate, that's really part of our initial reason for this messaging. And having this platform is really call-to-action, and it's got to be firm now. There's no excuses. Takes a little bit of time, might take some money.

Kate Beck [00:10:50]:
Yeah.

Amber Stitt [00:10:50]:
But, gosh, it does feel good on the other side when it's done.

Kate Beck [00:10:53]:
Yeah. I mean, we were talking in general, because many of us are living to be 100. Like, the statistics are no longer 70's, 80's, 83 is the average age someone has an accident and ends up in an assisted facility. And then they have six months to seven years. And so we're looking at age 100. I'm looking at age 200. Why not shoot for the stars?

Amber Stitt [00:11:16]:
I'm like 105. I'm good.

Kate Beck [00:11:21]:
I've been saying 120 since I was very young. I mean, I promised my grandmother, so that's that. Betty, may you rest in peace. And Betty G, I'll come see you after 120. We've got some time left. So with this time, how can we live our most vibrant, purposeful, and empowered life while helping others to do the same? And I feel like multiple things in this last week have been brought up. Let's not just talk to one person.

Kate Beck [00:11:50]:
Let's bring many with us. We're encouraging many people to get out and vote. We're encouraging many people to write down their wishes and revisit those wishes. Because here's the thing, life changes. And as long as you have something in writing. And also we now have Insuratech, which is another episode about how we can take these life insurance policies and take them and put them on the blockchain. So if something happens to you, a family member can be notified about these insurance policies. So that we're not letting insurance policies go unclaimed simply because nobody knew that they were there.

Kate Beck [00:12:27]:
So there's all of these informative resources, and we want to get the word out and raise the vibration in our community.

Amber Stitt [00:12:35]:
Well, and Jay, that's why you're important to this, because you have your main thing, but you're not stopping there. That was even before some of the tragedy. So I really appreciate the work that you're doing. And part of your story is, okay, the uncle, I mean, people just for whatever reason, assume it's like you're pulling the negative forward if we're planning. But literally, I mean, it's the responsible thing to do. So how do we make this cool? And that's really where the extended care planning, long-term care planning, not like long-term care products. But these conversations need to happen because your mother, at her age, down to these younger folks, they all matter, and they all are part of the process. They're all doing life together.

Amber Stitt [00:13:15]:
So how do we make it as seamless as possible?

Jay Washington [00:13:18]:
I'll be very open. So my sister that passed away. She was born with type 1 diabetes.

Amber Stitt [00:13:24]:
Oh, my gosh.

Jay Washington [00:13:24]:
We were told that the doctor said it was going to be a long path back from where she was, but they were dedicated. We're in. And on, I think it was January 3 of that year. My mother called me at 2:00 in the morning. They found my sister unresponsive. A virus got into her blood, and it attacked her organs. We were prepared for a long-term fight. We were not prepared to bury her.

Jay Washington [00:13:52]:
And, you know, at that point, I told my mom, I said, "I'm telling you right now. I'm pre-paying everything. I'm writing it into my will. I'm getting a will, and I'm writing in it that if something happens to me before you...do not go through this again. I don't want you to have to bury and have everything for another child. I am to be cremated, my organs to be donated, so that someone else may live. And my friend Jeff, who is a pilot, is going to spread the ashes at my favorite airport." And I said, "Because I don't want you to have to suddenly have to go through this again."

Jay Washington [00:14:25]:
My own grief process...we jumped right into the kids. I woke up 16 months later, crying uncontrollably, and was in bed for 10 days. Because I never grieved the loss of my sister, I pent up so many emotions, and they came out with a rage. Now, I'll always find the good and everything. It was early June, and because I couldn't get out of bed for 10 days, I also wasn't eating. So it was the best summer body I've had in years. But I would love to have gotten it a very different way.

Jay Washington [00:14:56]:
Again, I think it's the first born to me. It's like, okay, no matter how horrible something is, you look for the good in it. And it is my mission to get people to really think ahead, and not just for retirement, but, when you talk about emergency savings, I was a person who was on point to replace three times my unnecessary income for retirement. But if an emergency happened next Thursday, I gotta whip out my credit card.

Amber Stitt [00:15:20]:
Yeah. And that's huge. The chronic illness factor that can come from caregiver status. You telling your mom. "Hey, Jeff the pilot..." All these steps. It's not right now that she needs that resolved, but you are helping her mental health by knowing that's checked off her list. And that is why we have to start considering these things that are not comfortable, "Getting Comfortable with Conflict", as Kate likes to talk about.

Amber Stitt [00:15:45]:
Yeah, it's just the right thing to do. You leave and you go to Target and never make it back. Who are you affecting? And that could happen to any one of us anytime. So put that out there and take care of your people that you care about. If we love anyone, anyone loves us for able bodied, there's no excuses.

Jay Washington [00:16:01]:
Right.

Amber Stitt [00:16:01]:
So a very cool idea. Not that cremation is cool, but hey, there you go. Now I know where you're going to be.

Jay Washington [00:16:10]:
Yes.

Kate Beck [00:16:11]:
Wow. Well, what cultivated all this confidence? I mean, did you just wake up and you're like, "Hey, I'm a confidence Jay, and I'm propelling seeds of peace everywhere I go." Has it always been easy for you, or did it take time to develop those skills?

Jay Washington [00:16:26]:
It has definitely not always been easy. It has always looked easier than it is. Quite honestly, it's been a struggle. I spent a great many years settling, being told this is how you should be, being really kind of put into a box, if you will, and I accepted it. As I was thinking about this podcast, I thought back to something a woman said to me, and it was so random. I was in the gym, and I was just finishing up, and as I was leaving, a woman came up to me and she said, "You know, I watch you here all the time, and you're so dedicated." And she's like, "You've got a smile that lights up a room."

Jay Washington [00:17:02]:
And she said, "I feel bad for you because your life will never be as easy as it should be or as it looks because people will watch you from afar and they will judge you and make assumptions about you." She goes, "I've watched you from afar and from up close, and I just hope that more people will take the time to actually get to know you because it will be great for both of you." I've experienced that many times, and for years, I just decided it was my lot in life. But you know that North Star. I will tell anybody, if you're struggling in life, you find your North Star because your North Star will truly guide you to your freedom. And when you're free, you're confident. And when you're confident, you stand up for what you're worth because you know what you can deliver as a man. It has been an awakening, especially as a man in sales, because there are, I don't want to say stigmas, but almost stereotypes.

Jay Washington [00:17:56]:
You know, "the finance bro", he wears nice suits, he has a nice car. He takes people out for dinner. He has the life. And I've talked to many men in the industry, and I said, you know, what really helped with finding this North Star in the awakening is being able to tell people and be honest and say, people have no idea how many times that I get home at night and I feel like the loneliest person in the world, and I am putting on the smile, and I'm doing everything to show the world how great my life is. And it feels terrible. To be able to release that energy and be able to say that, and not be afraid to say that was one thing. But as I began to talk about it more and also hear other men saying, "My God, I go through this same thing." And to be able to have these conversations, then I was able to take the steps to say, "Well, I'm not going to just talk about it.

Jay Washington [00:18:48]:
I'm going to do something about this." And that is probably, not even probably, that is 100% the greatest part of this journey, being able to break free of that, because I no longer felt the need to pretend or be what everyone else felt that I should be.

Kate Beck [00:19:06]:
Wow. In addition to being a great father and a participating family member, you're serving on multiple boards as well. Would you like to tell us a little bit more about the boards you're serving on?

Jay Washington [00:19:17]:
Absolutely. I love giving back, especially to our youth. So I am on the Junior Achievement of Delaware Darrelle Revis Foundation, which is dedicated to fighting childhood hunger. Jamaur Law Foundation, which is dedicated to teaching financial literacy, as well as the G Collective Art Foundation, which is dedicated to bringing art to former steel communities of western Pennsylvania, all centered around giving back and empowering our youth and next generation.

Kate Beck [00:19:47]:
Gosh.

Amber Stitt [00:19:48]:
So, Jay, do you talk about this story? I was thinking, like, community talking through and just being vulnerable. Are you also sharing that story with the young folk to say, it's okay, we all go through that type of evolution, really?

Jay Washington [00:20:02]:
Absolutely. Especially about anxiety, because I never realized it. But once I found out what anxiety is and was diagnosed and knew the feeling, I realized I've been dealing with anxiety since I was 5. It's hereditary, and my grandmother had anxiety. And so now I talk to youth because I realize if 5 year-old me knew what he was going through, he would have been able to do something about it a long time ago.

Amber Stitt [00:20:26]:
So, in addition to. Let's just say you have this persona, but, you talked about the car, the dressing up, but, I think there's something about you that just likes that creative expression. You're kind of known as the guy that's well dressed. Would you say that's true?

Jay Washington [00:20:42]:
100%. I will say, without shame or hesitation, I describe myself as a lifestyle guy. The last thing I want to do is walk into a room and look like any other guy there. I like to express myself with my clothing, and it's become much easier because now that I am more selective with my circle. People look at me, and they realize that it's not an "all thriller, no filler", that I can walk into the room as a stylish guy, but I also know what I'm talking about.

Amber Stitt [00:21:13]:
Yeah.

Jay Washington [00:21:13]:
And it's just an expression of me. I love any excuse to dress up. I may not understand every rule of polo, or care who's winning the horse race, but I love to go, because where else am I gonna wear my hat?

Kate Beck [00:21:25]:
And those pants and shoes. Oh, my gosh. When I met Jay for the first time, he had blue suede shoes. I was so impressed.

Amber Stitt [00:21:34]:
That's cool.

Kate Beck [00:21:35]:
These shoes he had on every day were really fun, unique, and extremely classy. And I still remember his Chanel sunglasses. This guy, from head to toe, has thought of every detail. I was very impressed.

Jay Washington [00:21:50]:
Thank you. I appreciate that.

Kate Beck [00:21:52]:
Yes.

Amber Stitt [00:21:52]:
Well, so you. I mean, I think you go around, you have multiple boards, but also you're speaking. So that's where, before meeting you officially today, I always thought like the same thing, but from afar, because I'm seeing photography, and just like you showing up at different places and very active on LinkedIn, too. So I think everyone we talk about really knowing who you are and that branding for you is like, you wear it. We all should have the ability to really just be ourselves and be authentic and be consistent with that, and it can be fun for people to know us that way.

Jay Washington [00:22:24]:
Absolutely. I agree 100%.

Amber Stitt [00:22:26]:
So, are you traveling a lot for more of that public, that figure and advocating for others?

Jay Washington [00:22:32]:
Absolutely. One of my favorite things to say to people is, I'll go to a meeting, and someone says, "I could never get away with wearing that." And I, without a doubt, will always come back and say, "You absolutely can. You just have to own it. And if somebody ridicules you for it, do not stand for it. Stand up for yourself. Defend your style choices." And I say, "You will be amazed that you tell people that you're not going to stand for that.

Jay Washington [00:22:55]:
It stops. You absolutely can wear whatever you want. Just have to own it."

Kate Beck [00:23:01]:
Yeah, I love it. Now, when you walk into a room full of people, do you have to psych yourself up before you get there, or do you just. You just are so happy with where you are right now, you just enter because it's just easy and natural.

Jay Washington [00:23:16]:
It's a little bit of both. I'm gonna let you in on a little secret that people never believe. I am the most extroverted introvert that you've ever met in your entire life. And I would say there are a lot of men who are like that. So at times, I have to remember and remind myself, "You know what, if everyone in the room doesn't love you, you will find someone, go in with an open heart and open mind, smile and invite people in, and the right ones will reciprocate."

Kate Beck [00:23:42]:
Yeah, I love that. Jay, what makes someone or something timeless?

Jay Washington [00:23:48]:
A couple of things, I think kindness and what I like to call adaptive authenticity. And the kindness is you never know what someone else's situation is. And so always approach them with kindness. A smile can brighten someone's day. It can change their whole trajectory. It can make them feel welcome when, like me, they're walking into a room wondering, "Am I going to be overpowering? How is this going to work out?" And when I say the adaptive authenticity, you want to be yourself, but you also want to realize that you're going to change, times change, your chapters and phases in life change. So you want to keep true to who you are, but you also want to be able to adapt. Ideally, 45 year-old you is not the same person as 25 year-old you, but should still have those same core values.

Amber Stitt [00:24:36]:
I think that's showing leadership. And you mentioned something about the 5 year-old with anxiety. I have a 5 year-old, so I'm thinking, okay, she's going in, kids are sitting down and having to do certain things that are maybe not so natural for them in an 8 hour period. Or, maybe they are trying to express themselves in different ways. I feel like you're showing this journey of, if you would have known, then maybe some of these seasons could have been different. Maybe all of this was purposeful. But do you feel like there's more resources now for the younger ones to then be able to fast track it potentially if they want to?

Jay Washington [00:25:12]:
Becoming a father figure the way...you know what becoming a father the way that I did has been an eye-opener, because I look at my nephew, who I call mini me. You can see him behind me. It's hilarious, because people are like, "If I didn't know your story, I would think he's yours." And I see so much of myself in him as a child, and I see his emotional intelligence. He's actually my emotional intelligence hero. He expresses himself in ways that I didn't have the bandwidth, and I think it's because of the access to information and just, I mean, we're humans, but we're still evolving, and so 100%, and I advocate for parents to tell them, let your kids express themselves.

Amber Stitt [00:25:52]:
Yeah.

Jay Washington [00:25:53]:
Talk to them. Ask them how they're feeling. You know, we're from the, "Oh, it'll be fine," generation. It won't always be fine. Let the kids have their feelings and really check-in with them and be their champion.

Amber Stitt [00:26:06]:
Yeah. The emotional intelligence is interesting. I did not test well. I'm picturing you in a world of menus, of retirement plans. I'm like, I don't picture that. Like, I feel like those are the very quiet ones. You know, I don't know that world first hand per say, but not trying to be stereotypical, but it's like the radiologist is probably more quiet. They always get teased as the people just working behind the imaging.

Amber Stitt [00:26:27]:
So I'm sure you bring the party to that side of things, but the emotional intelligence, knowing who you are...I didn't test well when I did the financial services exams. So for me, it was like, I guess, I got through it, of course. But it's not all about maybe testing or how the modern, I don't know, curriculums might be for, say, kids, or for any of us. There could be different routes and paths, and so as long as you know yourself to the core, the emotional intelligence can really help us have more confidence and have grace for ourselves. And so it's really cool you're seeing that in your nephew, you know?

Jay Washington [00:26:57]:
Thank you. Yeah, I'm very proud of him. And, you know, I test extremely well. I have first born child syndrome. I'm incredibly trainable, and I will tell people I test very well, but I try never to be the smartest person in the room because I'm trying to continue to learn.

Amber Stitt [00:27:14]:
Yeah.

Jay Washington [00:27:14]:
And I'm usually not.

Amber Stitt [00:27:16]:
Yeah. Kate, you always say, "Hey, I'm trainable."

Kate Beck [00:27:19]:
I do. I'm trainable, coachable, and I'm all about the action team. I love to hear the beginning, the middle, and the end. One of my biggest challenges, though, is I'm an interrupter, and I've been working so hard on really focusing on my active listening, allowing people to finish their thoughts. But my mind and my heart are like 3 steps ahead. I'm a high EQ and also visionary in the that term. But as far as taking all of that information, I'm like, "Oh, let's meet and have this..." And I can already see the opportunities growing and the fruit hanging off the trees before people are even finished with their sentence, I have to remind myself to be in this present moment.

Amber Stitt [00:28:03]:
Well, that's why Jay, Kate, and I, "Let's start a podcast," because we had some common ground, which we discussed that early on in the season, hence needing you to be on the show, mix it up, and have that different viewpoint. We need all parts of the team, right?

Jay Washington [00:28:18]:
Absolutely. Kate, I would say that I have that same issue at times, and owning it is a beautiful thing because you can tell people, I'm not interrupting you because I don't value what you're saying. My mind is taking what you're saying, and it runs so fast and I get so excited that I just want to blurt out what I am thinking about what we can do together. And I find it's been well received. It's usually when you just do it and you're not conscious of it that people are more turned off.

Amber Stitt [00:28:48]:
Yeah.

Kate Beck [00:28:49]:
Thank you for that.

Amber Stitt [00:28:51]:
You talked about going into the room. I think sometimes if we have some people that we know that are part of our nonprofit that might not love speaking, sometimes you just talk about, hey, I might not be the most, you know, you want to say the "I am" statements, but sometimes you can convey this is where I'm strong. Here's where I might not be able to get my point across. But again, that emotional intelligence, that self awareness, let people know because they're going to be kinder, and then you can be kinder to yourself. If that's just not like you said, extrovert, introvert. If you're an introverted phase at this point, you could let people know that.

Amber Stitt [00:29:22]:
It's like, I'm not trying to be intentional with that, but I need some space to get my work done or whatever it is. So communication being key.

Jay Washington [00:29:31]:
Absolutely. When you surround yourself with the right people, they will absolutely pick you up and carry you where your weakness is, and then you can in turn, do the same thing for them. Just thinking about doing this podcast, when Kate approached me, number one, it's an incredible honor, but I was laughing internally because she asked me and "Oh, yeah, I'll do it." You know, she didn't even get a chance. Like, "Yeah, I'm in."

Jay Washington [00:29:55]:
And for me, the reason I'm in is because when you create something, it's your baby. When you want to share your baby with someone, that is an honor. And again, just with the demeanor that you approached Kate, it made it such a no brainer.

Amber Stitt [00:30:08]:
So she's good at that.

Kate Beck [00:30:10]:
Thank you.

Amber Stitt [00:30:11]:
So, Jay, if people want to meet you, work with you, find you, follow you, what's the best way?

Jay Washington [00:30:17]:
I would say LinkedIn, because I do, when it comes to the socials, I like to keep my professional and my personal life completely separate. But I do bring my personality to LinkedIn because, as you mentioned, financial services is not the most exciting to everybody, but it's something that everyone needs to think about. So I try to bring some personality to it. So I do bring my personality to LinkedIn. It's: "Jay Washington". And as I mentioned, I work for LeafHouse Financial. I would just follow me on LinkedIn.

Jay Washington [00:30:46]:
You know, more than anything, I always say, if we can't do business together, but I can help guide you to something that's going to give you a better financial outcome. I consider that a win.

Kate Beck [00:30:56]:
Thank you, Jay. What a pleasure.

Amber Stitt [00:30:58]:
Thank you for being here.

Jay Washington [00:31:00]:
Thank you both for having me. This has been fantastic.

Kate Beck [00:31:03]:
Thank you for joining us on the Timeless Vitality podcast. We hope today's episode has inspired you to embrace the journey of thriving well beyond 100.

Amber Stitt [00:31:12]:
Remember, your story is still unfolding, and every step you take adds to the timeless legacy you are creating. Until next time, stay vibrant, stay empowered, and continue living with purpose.

Kate Beck [00:31:24]:
We'll see you on the next episode!