Get on Their Turf with Dr. Suzanne Simpson

Parent Plan B Support Your Teen’s Mental Health at Home When the System Fails with AnneMoss Rogers

• Dr. Suzanne Simpson

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Parent Plan B – Supporting Your Teen’s Mental Health When the System Fails with AnneMoss Rogers

When mental health supports aren’t available, too expensive, or impossible to access, what can parents do at home?

In this powerful episode of Get On Their Turf, Dr. Suzanne Simpson talks with AnneMoss Rogers: mental health advocate, TEDx speaker, and author of Emotionally Naked: A Teacher’s Guide to Preventing Suicide and Recognizing Kids at Risk. After losing her son Charles to suicide, AnneMoss turned unimaginable grief into a mission to save lives through education, compassion, and connection.

Together, Suzanne and AnneMoss explore what every parent needs to know when they’re waiting for help that may never come. You’ll learn how to build a “Plan B” that creates emotional safety and trust at home, even when the system feels broken.

In this episode, you’ll hear:
• What parents can do when therapy isn’t available
• Early warning signs of concern versus “normal teen” behaviour
• How to create connection and safety in daily routines
• Ways to model vulnerability without oversharing
• How parents can rebuild trust and hope after crisis

If you’ve ever felt powerless watching your teen struggle, this conversation will help you find confidence and clarity in what you can do — right now, at home.

Guest:
🎙️ *AnneMoss Rogers* — TEDx speaker, mental health keynote speaker and suicide prevention speaker., and author of *Emotionally Naked: A Teacher’s Guide to Preventing Suicide and Recognizing Kids at Risk.
Visit [EmotionallyNaked.com](https://emotionallynaked.com) to learn more.

https://parentingtips.grweb.site
https://app.monstercampaigns.com/c/q0eodg6ueibwtefkatj3/
https://mentalhealthawarenesseducation.com/ 

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Listen to more episodes: linktr.ee/GetOnTheirTurf

If you are in crisis or worried about someone:
• Canada – Talk Suicide Canada 1-833-456-4566 or text 45645
• USA – Call or text 988
• UK & ROI – Samaritans 116 123

If your region is not listed, contact your local emer

Find my interview playlist on YouTube Dr Suzanne Simpson, at Get On Their Turf:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HC8JprFdrPA&list=PLi7xFsX7h7tdxBsVx38UIRVrvnCc_9IBW


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What is the one message you wish you could tell every parent, to empower them to support their kids on the home front? Listen more and lecture less. Kids want to be seen and heard. In a world of social media, I hear this from young people again and again. AnneMoss Rogers, thank you so much for joining me from Virginia. Thank you for having me, I appreciate it. We met on LinkedIn. You’re a mental health warrior parent and speaker. Today let’s talk about empowering parents to support kids’ mental health at home, especially in a broken system. You co‑wrote *Emotionally Naked*, a teacher’s guide to preventing suicide and recognising kids at risk. Tell me about yourself. I also wrote *Diary of a Broken Mind*, my memoir. Around 2010, my younger son Charles’s drug use escalated. Later I learned he used substances to numb suicidal thoughts. We tried counselling and programmes—wilderness, therapeutic boarding school—he returned home 22 months later, angry, because none of it was voluntary. Near 20, he became addicted to heroin. I didn’t know—he was snorting it. One day I noticed the family silver was gone. The police came, and I learned he was addicted. Detox, rehab, recovery house, relapse—then detox again. He walked out with a friend. For two weeks we didn’t know where he was. At dinner one night, the police told us he had been found dead that morning. I was sure it was an overdose, but it was suicide. I felt like a crummy parent, that I hadn’t loved enough. I punished myself for a long time before I forgave myself. We were a normal family. We baked cakes, played, coached sports. Looking back at old videos, I saw my son grew up in a house of love. It wasn’t something I said or did that caused his suicide. I had been hyper‑focusing on the five percent I did imperfectly, ignoring the ninety‑five percent I did right—many parents do this. Families feel deep shame after suicide, substance use, or self‑harm. How do we create safe, empathetic, supportive spaces so parents feel empowered, not blamed?

That self‑blame thought will creep in. Sit with it, let it lift, then refocus:

this is not about me. Ask, what’s gravely wrong in my child’s life? Build the relationship so they will open up.

Self‑harm isn’t to hurt us. It is pain they can’t express. Physical pain feels concrete; the blood represents what they feel. These behaviours are not our fault, but we must understand, accept feelings, and then ask:

is my focus helping my child? Lapses happen. Recovery isn’t linear. A lapse isn’t total failure—it’s part of learning. We help our kids move from unhealthy to healthy coping. Substance use robs kids of developing coping skills. We must model healthy coping—if we need wine to relax, we’re teaching reliance on substances. Our kids do what we do, not what we say. Create non‑judgmental spaces for parents; fear of judgment shapes behaviour. People will judge—let it go, in time.

Overarching warning signs:

isolation beyond typical teen pulling away; dropping a beloved lifelong activity without replacing it; secrecy, manipulation, constant lying; sudden friend group shifts. These can be red flags for mental health or substance use.

Example:

computers stayed in common areas with cut‑off times. Secretive behaviour around passwords or late‑night use was a red flag. Changing friends isn’t automatically “bad friends”; often kids with similar struggles find each other. I learned not to blame the friends—my son was sometimes the ringleader. They all had bad ideas together. “Birds of a feather flock together.” Social media is a major challenge. What’s your main message to parents navigating it?

First:

who owns the phone? We do. I don’t think kids under 15 should have smartphones. Without boundaries, you’re exposing them to grooming, porn, and more. Create rules—phones in a basket at home, limited hours, and parents model it too. Schools should ban phones in classrooms. After phone bans, students talk and connect more. The foundation of mental health is connection and belonging—constant device use undermines it. Kids need to discover the limits of social media themselves, guided by a family media plan. Algorithms target kids at their lowest to keep them on platforms—that’s how the business works. Tech leaders often keep their own kids away from smartphones and social media. Time on platform is rewarded; it isn’t real friendship. Don’t judge yourself by other people’s likes. Expect a three‑week withdrawal period when boundaries change—anger, irritability. Then it eases, and kids reconnect. Face‑to‑face time builds the skills they need. Kids need more “freelance time” to figure things out—less scheduled, more independent exploration. It’s often safer outside than online.

Plan B at home when the system can’t deliver:

if possible, access family‑based treatment (often on Zoom). Learn CBT and DBT skills. Move from punitive parenting to wisdom guide—lectures don’t work. Ask questions with curiosity. I told my teens they could call me out when I started lecturing. Within two months, the habit was gone. Questions restore their power and engagement.

Affirm competence without empty cheerleading:

“You’re smart; you’ll figure this out.” When they bring home a bad mark, empathise and ask, “What will you do differently next time?” Model vulnerability appropriately—ordinary imperfections and repair. Ask kids for support; it empowers them and builds their sense of purpose and self‑worth.

Parents are the authority in a loving home. Invite input, but set boundaries. Teach delayed reactions:

breathe, let the “snow globe” settle before deciding. Impulse control prevents many risky behaviours. For self‑harm, use step‑down substitutions (elastic band snaps, holding ice) while building healthier coping.

Notice and name small wins:

“I saw you take a deep breath before reacting—amazing.” Brief, genuine acknowledgements build momentum. Kids do want parents to be parents. Clear, loving rules (like phone baskets) show care and investment. Boundaries equal love and safety. They want boundaries, not a field with no fences. Open and close the gates as they grow. Parenting is hard—every generation faces new challenges.

Final wrap‑ups:

what one message empowers parents at home? Listen more and lecture less. Kids want to be seen and heard—especially in the world of social media. Avoid “tiger mom” conditioning—worth is not grades. Move away from equating achievement with love.

How to build connection in an isolation era:

allow silence—don’t rush to fill it. Talk while doing low‑pressure activities (shooting hoops, walking). Ask questions only when invited to advise. Understand fears before pushing treatment. Write questions together for clinicians. Ownership increases buy‑in. Being on their turf can be as simple as a walk—or yes, even a bacon burger. Know what opens your child up, and meet them there. Why be emotionally naked as parents? Authenticity models being human. Show how you recover from failure; let kids see real grief and repair. That empowers kids to know it’s okay to not be okay. We can’t be perfect, and neither can they. AnneMoss Rogers, thank you so much for this discussion. It’s been great to be here. Thank you. Thanks for listening. Please share this with a parent who needs support. Subscribe for more ways to support your child and get on their turf, and leave a comment. See you next time.