Travel Is Cheaper Than Divorce

From Culture Shock to Personal Growth

• David Packer • Season 2 • Episode 7

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What if the challenges we face in travel could guide us through life's toughest moments, offering unexpected rewards? Join us as we explore this intriguing idea, drawing parallels between the anxieties of navigating airports and the discomforts of marriage or career risks. With personal stories, like a tense layover in Guatemala, we reflect on how embracing discomfort can lead to enriching experiences. Whether it's the culture shock of moving from California's sunny Mojave Desert to Utah's harsh winters, or discovering diverse cultures, we uncover how stepping outside our comfort zones can transform our lives.

In this episode, I dig into the power of open communication and understanding, both in personal relationships and broader societal interactions. We challenge assumptions that hinder connection, encouraging listeners to find common ground and alleviate fears through resources like travel guides and apps. By using travel as a metaphor, I highlight the benefits of taking calculated risks in communication and life, and share practical tips for traveling with ease. Embrace a relaxed approach to rekindling relationships and welcome new experiences that enrich our perspectives and connections.

Speaker 1:

You are listening to. Travel is Cheaper than Divorce. This podcast for all those who may be struggling with their spouse or their children and the relationship with them. We help give you tips and tricks by using travel as the means to be able to help your relationships with your family. I'll provide those tricks and other ways to help travel with little or no cost. So let's get into it Everybody. Just relax, just chill for a second, just calm down, calm down down. Everything is going to be okay.

Speaker 1:

I say this because you know I've traveled a lot and still every time I travel there's a point where you're just gonna feel uncomfortable. I I mean for me, even with my TSA pre-check, I slide through security pretty well, pretty quickly, almost every time less than five minutes. It doesn't mean that it doesn't make me nervous. Every time I go through TSA. Every time I go through TSA, I feel a bit uncomfortable. It's not a comfortable feeling. And then you have to get out of the airport. You got to find your way to baggage claim If you check a bag. I never check a bag because I hate baggage claim. But I've been on vacations 10 day vacations I don't check a bag still, because I don't like it. I hate it actually. Anyway, but yeah, it's, it can be uncomfortable. It can be completely uncomfortable to travel to a new place and try to find your way around and, frankly, some people have anxiety when they travel. You know, I once went to an open-air airport. Open-air airport, all the check-ins were outdoors, outdoors of all places. It was a tropical place, it was in gosh, I can't remember, it was one of the Hawaiian islands, I think it might have been Kauai. Anyway, it's, you know, it's hard to navigate sometimes travel and you can have a lot of anxiety around it.

Speaker 1:

I remember traveling to Costa Rica. Costa Rica really made me nervous as I was traveling there. In fact, we had a layover in guatemala and every time we went to it, okay, so we had to go through security in guatemala. Now, keep in mind, we were just transferring flights, we went from one flight to another. We it's not like we exited the airport and came back in, we were just on a layover and it didn't matter. We had to go through security three times, three separate times in Guatemala, and every time you went to a different part of the airport, there were armed policemen at every single terminal and we had to, I think, go through two of those things. They weren't necessarily checkpoints I would call them that, though but they asked you in a language I did not understand, obviously in Spanish. They were asking me where we were going, and we had to, and I guess I knew enough Spanish to know that that's what. I just held up my boarding pass and they said okay, go ahead and go through Armed guards, like with hefty stuff. That's one that makes somebody nervous, right?

Speaker 1:

Anyways, eventually got on our plane from Guatemala to Costa Rica, and the rest is the rest of it. But see, that's the thing. The rest of it was the exciting part. It takes a little bit of nervousness, it makes you a little bit uncomfortable to get to somewhere beautiful. I mean, we could even use that same analogy for almost anything in life marriage, or raising children, or even taking a risk for your business or taking a risk in your career A little bit of uncomfortableness to get somewhere beautiful.

Speaker 1:

So relax. When you travel, there's going to be some anxiety. There's always going to be some anxiety. Just relax, you will make it through it, and you'll actually feel better getting to the destination. Because you're able to make it through all that, because once you're there, you can sit back and say you are in a good place, no matter where you're at, you're in a good place. Different people that you've never seen before. Sometimes, if you're international, different cultures or even if you're never seen before. Sometimes, if you're international, different cultures or even if you're not international. Sometimes even in this country, in the United States, you'll find different cultures inside even the US. You'll know that when you go to the Hawaiian Islands, for example, or sometimes in the South is a lot different than the West, and sometimes even people get some culture shock when they travel from, say, the east coast to Utah. This is the fun part about though. It's almost like the anxiety is the fun part about it. You will love where you go. You will love where you go.

Speaker 1:

I have not traveled to one place, one place that I didn't like, not one. I didn't particularly like the airport in Guatemala, but I bet Guatemala is a beautiful country, I don't know, but that was a little nerve wracking, but I didn't travel there, I was just going through there. So it was. Everywhere I've gone, I've loved. Everywhere I've gone, I've loved. Sometimes it takes some getting used to. Lots of fun, though. Lots of fun.

Speaker 1:

I'm reminded of a story, in fact, when we moved our family. Well, excuse me, not when I moved our family, pardon me, but when my family, when my parents got divorced, moved from California to Utah, you don't believe that there was a culture shock there. You better believe there was. It was really uncomfortable. Now, it wasn't just the culture, it was the weather. We moved from the Mojave Desert in California. If you know anything about the Mojave Desert, it's hot there like hot. Okay, we moved from hot, really hot to the winter. We moved to the Salt Lake area in northern Utah was one of the worst winters they had in a decade, so not only did I go to a whole new climate, but it kicked my butt. It kicked my butt Snow everywhere so bad that even in Utah they closed down the schools because the snow was so bad.

Speaker 1:

In fact, another memory I have is when we went in to our new place, keeping in mind that we moved from a house to a duplex after my parents got divorced and the heater wasn't working and we moved in in the winter and it was freezing cold. And I vividly remember this picture where all four of us there were four kids in my family were huddled up with a blanket around us and just shivering, just chattering teeth, shivering inside of our new house. What an experience. For the first time, moving to a new place, what an experience.

Speaker 1:

But see, the thing is, is that just like traveling, and you get used to it over time. I got used to it. I'll say I'll never really got used to the cold, though. That's why I moved to extreme southern Utah, because I don't like the cold, I don't like the snow, and I know some people absolutely love those things. I do not. I am not a fan, but otherwise I got used to the culture. I got used to the people. It's actually the people are very nice, generally speaking. It has to be. Generally speaking.

Speaker 1:

In utah, and generally speaking, nearly everywhere I've been, people have been nice, which brings me to another point that I didn't think I was going to talk about. But there's, this world is crazy, and we can see all these people who are doing terrible things to each other. Trust me, my wife has been through tons of things that I would never wish on anybody done by people to her right, and I could easily say that this world is terrible and it's a terrible place with terrible people and the whole thing. I don't say that, because what I do know, from from traveling again this is another thing you learn is that the majority of people, I believe, on this earth are good people trying to do their best. That's what I believe, and I I've gained this knowledge by all the places I've been house, just in your state, just in this one little area. Then maybe you're like, oh, the majority of the people here are nice, or the majority of people are bad, or whatever. Get out, get out, go travel, get around and realize that most of the people out there are actually good people trying to do their best out there too. You know, we're in a pretty, pretty, pretty ruckus. I'll say, I don't know, pretty strong, I don't know what the word is right now political environment where it seems like, oh, if they're on the other side, they must be a bad person. No, they're a good person trying to do the best they can.

Speaker 1:

It's just a terrible way of thinking. And that's actually a terrible way of thinking even inside your own family. What if you say, well, my wife's always on the wrong, she just doesn't get it and she'll never get it? That's where it gets really bad when you say things like she'll never get it or again, he'll never get it. He will never get it. He'll never get it. He will never get it. That's a finality statement. That's a statement that there's the end, and I'm cutting it right here He'll never get it.

Speaker 1:

Have you tried traveling with your spouse and having a conversation with them? Have you had a conversation with them where you just be quiet and listen? Because if you have those conversations, then you'll realize, oh, she or he are just trying to do the best they can too, just like you are. There's just some sort of misunderstanding between them. I can even use the two political parties in this particular country as an example of that. It's not the parties, it's the people. And if you talk to a person on the other quote-unquote, other side I think we're all Americans, but on the other side and you just have a conversation with them without judging them immediately, what you'll find sometimes is that you guys agree on more than you disagree.

Speaker 1:

I didn't think I was going to go here in this podcast, this episode, but a lot of the anxiety around traveling, I'm telling you, will melt away when you realize people are just people and they're good people and they will help you. But if you're traveling somewhere you don't know where you're going, ask somebody. They're good people. Yeah, I say this in general. I know there's bad people, trust me, I know there's bad people out there. I know there are bad people out there. But just like my experience from moving from California, southern California to Northern Utah, just like that experience I will tell you that sometimes it's a bit of a shock, but once you get through the initial shock and it doesn't take long, especially when you're traveling because you're actually there to relax but once you get through the relax, the initial shock that could turn into lack of relaxation then you can just sit back, relax and enjoy, which is what I was able to do eventually when we move to Utah from Southern California, northern Utah, from Southern California.

Speaker 1:

After the divorce, I was never really comfortable though to be honest with you with the divorce thing. Still am not. That's why a lot of the things that got shaped in my life because of the divorce. That's why this podcast exists, because I want to do everything I can to help you as a man or you as a woman, but I mostly speak to the men. I really want you to do everything you can to keep your family together, because it affects your family so much to get a divorce. So just relax, guys. Just relax when you're out there in the world.

Speaker 1:

There are many travel guides, there are many websites, there's many people who write blogs, frankly, on countries. There's so many different places you can go online that will help you to navigate, navigate that, that world. So when you, when you go to the destination, you have a lot of information in hand and there are some apps, by the way, quite a few apps, honestly that help you with this kind of stuff. Even the logistics of travel can make you really nervous, like where do I check in? What airport do I go in? Where do I check in? What airport do I go in? How do I check in? How do I go straight to the gate? How do I get through security, especially in a foreign country, and so on and so forth. Yeah, that's tough, but all the logistics stuff.

Speaker 1:

There are so many apps that you can download that you can put all of your itinerary in. I have one, but it's more geared towards um points, but there is a place where I I basically take my confirmations from whatever airline I'm flying and I forward them on to, uh, this app, and they'll just put it into an organized place. For me it's so easy, it makes traveling so much easier, because my aim is is for you to get through the really nervous and kind of the anxiety-driven part, to get to the destination and then to enjoy time with your family and spouse and rekindle the love that you have for each other if it was your spouse, and then, of course, also with your family. So, again, as I started this podcast, this episode, the same way just relax. Just relax, you'll get through it. There's so many travel tips out there and there's going to be even some more on my website, where I talk about sometimes some apps that are out there that can help you with all these things, because I know that there are some people who honestly don't leave their house because of anxiety. Just take that first step, man. Just take that first step. Woman, just take that first step outside of your door or out of your city.

Speaker 1:

Some people will refuse to fly. That's fine. You can get to almost almost. It's kind of difficult sometimes logistically in this country, but there's a lot of places you can go by train. If you limit yourself to train, there's still a lot of destinations you can go via train.

Speaker 1:

If you are nervous, if you're nervous about flying. Flying can be nerve wracking, but you do it enough. That's another thing. Again, another thing I could tell you is that everything will be okay. If you fly enough like I have been flying a lot of places then you realize that that little bump on the airplane is pretty normal. That sound coming from the engine is normal, the bump it feels when they bring out the landing gear on a Boeing normal. All that's pretty normal stuff, stuff. Now, a door flying off a Boeing, that's not really a thing, that's not normal. But that happened, like once. And then everybody takes that as, oh, that's always gonna happen. No, guys, there's always exceptions to the rule.

Speaker 1:

And if you look at airline travel, I mean I don't think we've had a major crash of a major airline in, I think, over a decade. It just doesn't happen. It's safe, it really is safe to travel by plane. I'm not trying to convince you, but as you go through and you get on that plane the first time, it's going to make you nervous the whole time. Second time maybe a little bit more nervous, less and less nervous the more you fly. But if you can't, just cannot put yourself on a plane. I have a brother-in-law has that he cannot get on a plane, so it's either driving or a train with him. I'm in the in the process of getting my pilot's license, so maybe I can get him to go into a plane with me. Probably less likely, actually, probably probably less likely.

Speaker 1:

But really, guys, if you're able to get over that anxiety of where you're going, first of all, you can always choose somewhere in the state if you feel like you can't get too far, but just get away from your house, like I said in. I've said in an earlier episode. I said that it's important for you to get further away than it feels comfortable for your house. Like you don't want to be within 10 minutes of your house, you'll just go back home. So you want to be further enough away where it's complete inconvenience for you to drive home in the middle of this trip. So if it's only two or three hours away, okay, fine, that's a start right. Or if you say I can't afford to travel, well, gosh, that's what I do, guys. I help people travel in luxury for little or no cost. I will help you get there. If this is something you want and I want you to want it because I want you to help your family. I want you to help yourself with your family. I want the anxiety levels to drop so far so that you can come together as a family. Because, again, my goal here is for sure yeah, I want you to travel, but I'm only wanting you to travel so you can save your family, so you can save your children from what I've had to go through, because divorce is not good on your children.

Speaker 1:

Traveling is Traveling as a family. Think of the mind-blowing extremes we're talking about here Traveling with your family versus divorce, and you lose your family Versus divorce, and you lose your family. Is it worth a little investment in time or effort to learn how to travel For little or no cost, or whatever, or with cost, if you prefer that method? I don't think it is because, again, no matter what you do, no matter what you do, even if you pay in cash, travel is still going to be cheaper than divorce. You have been listening to Travel is Cheaper Than Divorce with David Packer. Please let us know what you think about this episode or any other comments you might have by visiting our website at wwwtravelpointdadcom. Please join us for our next episode, where we continue to explore how travel can help bring your family together.