From Grief To Surrender with Author Mia Godfrey

Grief can make you shut down, speed up, or reach for anything that helps you feel less. 

Today we sit with the kind of story that cuts through the noise: Mia Godfrey’s path from Romania under the communist regime to life in the United States, and the losses that shaped her along the way. 

She opens up about losing her father young, falling into alcohol addiction without healthy support, and what it took to finally admit that survival tools are not the same as healing.

Mia shares the shock of being widowed at 35 after moving to Knoxville, Tennessee, and how a church community stepped in when she had no real safety net. We talk about what grief looks like behind closed doors: hiding, arriving late, leaving early, avoiding questions, and using overworking as a “respectable” way to run from pain. 

Then 2023 brings another hard chapter when Mia becomes the main caretaker for her sister and best friend through ovarian cancer, forcing a deeper kind of surrender and a new kind of prayer.

I share my own “pause for presence” practice and the honest prayers that rebuild trust when you feel ashamed or spiritually stuck. 

If you want to connect with Mia or purchase her new book Buried Not Broken visit her website: https://miagodfrey.com/

To download a free chapter of host Sylvia Worsham's bestselling book, In Faith, I Thrive: Finding Joy Through God's Masterplan, purchase any of her products, or book a call with her, visit her website at www.sylviaworsham.com

Transcript

Welcome And Guest Setup

SPEAKER_01 0:02

If you've ever struggled with fear, doubt, or worry and wondering what your true purpose was all about, better then this podcast is for you. In this show, your host, Sylvia Warsham, will interview elite experts and ordinary people that have created extraordinary lives. So here's your host, Sylvia Warsham.

unknown 0:26

I've still got a lot of fire left.

SPEAKER_02 0:29

Hey library nurse, it's Sylvia Warsham. Welcome to Released Out Reveal Purpose. And today is Mia Godfrey. Her story is powerful. She's originally from Romania, widowed at 35, is going to be talking to us about those dark chapters of enormous grief, caretaking. Sounds like sounds very familiar to some of us. I know I myself could relate as I was reading her biography, because for 21 years, my mother was the main caretaker of my father who passed away two years ago. And as children watching that journey, we were able to really value the lessons you learn along the way of that grief journey. So without further ado, Mia, thank you so much for joining us on Release Tower Reveal Purpose. Thank you so much for having me, Sylvia. It's a pleasure and really an honor of mine to have someone that I know can talk and speak with truth because you have journeyed through these dark chapters. So would you honor us with that amazing story of transformation?

Widowhood And Finding Church Support

SPEAKER_00 1:41

So um I'm originally from Romania. Um I grew up under the communist regime and I am the youngest of ten children. And um my journey of grief started when I was 18 years old, uh, when I lost my father, and I witnessed my mom taking care of my father selflessly uh until his passing. So I had a few years that I kind of spiraled out of control. I did not have the proper tools or the proper friends to um or or the proper resources in Romania to help me deal with that grief. So I um turned to alcohol, which became my addiction. And years later, to God's grace, um, I was able to find the community that helped me understand that that was not the solution, the long-term solution. So when I was 27 years old, um I mar I met my first husband who actually came to Romania uh in a mission trip. So um fast forward less than a year later, we were married. So I moved to Knoxville, Tennessee, and I've been here for 17 years. So um we had seven years. We were married seven years, and when I was 35 years old, unexpectedly, he passed away. So at this point, seven years here in the States, um I still didn't have a strong community, uh like or or a support system. What helped me the most, I had a few people at work and actually my church, they stepped in, which the thing is, only three months prior to his passing I joined that church. So God knew that I needed that community to help me walk through that grief, to help me walk through that hardship, because here I was again not having all the proper tools to navigate through something so dark. So I was fortunate enough to have those people that slowly came together and helped me out. And um in 2023 I experienced grief again where when um one of my sisters and best friends, she got diagnosed with ovarian cancer, so I was her main caretaker. So my story of transformation and truly grasped this idea that there is so much more to life and God could truly use you if you surrender yourself. It came after 2023, but before that, it was just like a little bit in and out because I I didn't I didn't know, I didn't know where to find the community that could help me. So after 23, it's when I fully surrender to that change and allow God to use me.

SPEAKER_02 4:52

I love your story. Let me point out a couple of things that I want to empower the listeners on the other side on. Number one, congratulations for overcoming your addiction. That's tough. That is a tough situation to be in. Understandable why people fall into temptation a lot, because the grief can be so great when we lose someone we love and we don't have the resources or the or the community that we need. More importantly, we don't have God in our lives. And when we surrender to him, the value of surrender is so immense. That's why we're out here, you and I, Mia, talking about how he transformed our lives, because we want others to have that love and that transformation within themselves, because it's unlike anything you'll ever experience. And I commend you for selflessly giving of yourself, along with your mother, who selflessly gave of herself to caretake for her husband, because that is the true design of marriage, according to God. It is a one oneness with our brothers and sisters of Christ. Because we all belong to Him, we all belong to the one body of Christ. Yes. And I commend you for getting married, moving to a foreign country. That's a tough one as well. That's another pivotal moment with a lot of transition attached to it. But it sounds like he he was someone that you loved and and very much um became one with, and then unexpectedly you lost him. And you know, there comes a desperation. I think the one that said it best was Marianne Williamson. She had a quote, and I can't remember the the gist of the quote, but here it is. It's until your knees drop to the floor in total surrender that you understand what God can provide for you. It's that desperate. Um I my moment came when six doctors walked into my hospital room and gave my family and I a very grim diagnosis. Obviously, I survived or I wouldn't be speaking to you all today, but but it's when my knees hit the floor in total surrender. It was my first indication of surrender. And I find it interesting. This is where I can relate with you in 2023, is when my father received this terminal diagnosis. And once again, my knees hit the ground. And once again, not only was I surrendering in the moment of the terminal diagnosis, I was surrendering every day. That's what God taught me through that lesson. So I I'm honestly curious to understand what was the greatest lesson that God taught you during this period of your life.

Turning Loss Into Purpose

SPEAKER_00 7:44

So, of course, I've learned through every single grief, but um to the first and second, I know I answered, I asked that question, why and why me? Especially when I lost my husband. I couldn't understand. I say, God, why why did you allow me to drop everything, the life that I loved and my family, drop everything and move here to the United States so I can end up living alone and um without my husband. So I at first it was that because I realized later on I never truly surrounded to his will. I was just questioning why why me? Why me? I don't understand the purpose behind it. And I asked a lot of people why. So until I lost my sister and I spent 11 months back and forth traveling to Tennessee to see my family and then go back to Montana and help take care of her. Um it wasn't until I spent those 11 months with her that I realized that God's purpose is so much bigger. And now I look back and if I wouldn't have been through all those losses, if I wouldn't have grieved my sister, my father, my late husband, I would have never been in this place where I could actually walk the journey with people who are broken. I wouldn't be able to walk the journey and be able to identify if somebody's walking in in pain every single day, but they don't know how to process it and they don't know how to communicate it that. So I feel like through their passing, when I look back, the way God orchestrated everything, every step of the way brought me where I'm at today, where I surrendered and I trust God with all my heart, and I trust His plan that is perfect. Even when we don't see that it's perfect at in that moment, I see it now the impact they actually have now, after their passing, their impact and their legacy is going to continue on because through their passing, uh God opened those doors where I wrote now one, but I'm on my third book that uh they're meant to help empower women and find an identity and surrender and step into who God created them to be and find their purpose. So if you have if you'd asked me that question 10 years ago, I would have still the question. I don't understand the purpose. But fast forward to 2026, I see it clearly how everything was actually to help bring more awareness and help more people in the process.

Coaching Through Fear Into Joy

SPEAKER_02 10:49

I got tingling as you were speaking, and that's confirmation of the Holy Spirit in the room in this interview. I can see why we were brought to my podcast. It's kind of eerie how related related our stories are, how aligned they are, in that 2023 was so critical to me as well. In in when you sit in silence, and sometimes God steps away, and when we sit in that silence, we realize just how much we need him, number one, how much he reveals to us through his word, and only he can reveal certain things to us. We can we can read it elsewhere, and if our hearts are not ready, he won't reveal anything. At times to sit with it, because it teaches us lessons that equip us for what's coming next, and only he knows what's coming next. And that's the gist. I don't know if you knew this, but I my book in Faith I Thrive, Finding Joy Through God's Master Plan. The first manuscript was written in 2020, released in 2021. And then in 2023, I hired a publishing company to write it in the three voices that I originally wanted. And it was in those periods that my father received a terminal diagnosis. So I still had the strength to complete that project despite all the storms I was navigating. Because only in Christ can we find that peace within that only He can provide in our grief, in our, and to stay focused on our mission. So what I do in all of the work that I do with the podcast, with the books, is I guide people through gaining freedom from their fear-based belief systems, like from their old self, which we all have, you know, prior to learning and understanding who God is truly through that transformative journey. And I work with high achievers. I used to be a high achiever, and I point them towards their divine calling. And I do it in three different stages. First, I lead them through their fear, guide them through their, I guide them through their joy because people don't know how to be in joy. They know how to survive, they don't know how to thrive. They don't know how to be and embody joy the way that God initially intended for us to live this life to. Even though we have troubles, we have a lot of joy in it. And from that space then comes the full surrender to his sovereignty daily, not just when things collapse, but when in everyday moments, right, we embody these things and we embody his fruit daily of patience, of joy, of happiness, all the things that make us whole and complete. Because one thing I learned long ago was the word perfect in the Bible doesn't mean perfection the way us humans describe perfection, it means whole. And so all of us become whole through this journey, and it's an in every single moment. So as you were speaking, I remember just thinking, we're both in the same kind of journey to a degree. What if you have had a lot more caretaking and grief associated with your journey? So I'm assuming that's what you're currently working with because you became a student of that journey. I became a student of the journey of high achieving and my worth being attached to significance and things that of this world that block completely blocked my light. And it's blocking a lot of people's lives, and that's why you and I were placed in these positions. This is the mission, this is the role of our life and our divine calling. So speak to us more about who you are called to work with and how you help them.

Pride Obedience And Honest Prayer

SPEAKER_00 15:16

So growing up under the communist regime, we were taught that um, of course, you can trust anybody. And um we were thought to keep everything close, uh, just just immediate family. So here I was dealing with grief, not knowing how to communicate with anybody about my pain. So the first time 18 years old, what I did was return to alcohol. Um second time dealing with grief, I still had that um what I knew was to run away, don't talk about it, and I replaced the addiction of alcohol for overworking. So what I did when I lost my husband, I ended up getting three jobs. Getting up at 5, 5:30 a.m. until not getting home until 10, 11 p.m. and work all through the weekend to try to avoid the pain and avoid talking to people. I had um sweet friends of mine that they're they're really they're some of my best friends now. They used to come at my door, leave food at the table, ring the doorbell and leave because they knew I'm not gonna open the door. They knew I was hiding, they knew I was not ready to talk, they knew I was coming to church really late after the church started, so nobody will talk to me. And I used to leave church early before it was over, so I wouldn't talk to anybody. And not because I wanted to be rude or disrespectful, I really had no tools, did not know how. So when I went through everything with my sister and I saw a community of people stepping in and they pray with us and they pray over us, and and they helped at every area um with what we need, my prayers started changing. One of them was it was a prayer of surrender. Okay, God, what do you want me to learn from this? Because I've been running and running and running all my life, and here I claimed I was a Christian, uh, and but all I knew is to run. And even when I was talking to God, it wasn't a way, it was more at at the surface. It wasn't like truly spending time in God's presence and God's word and and say, God, I'm here, you can tell me what the next step will be. So spending that 11 months with her, God showed me that how can you bless others and help others if you keep running away? How can you pour into somebody else if you don't even know how to process your own emotions? So I dive deeper into learning. Um of course, I came home once again. I told my husband, I've never been so broken in my entire life. And I'm done and I don't know where to go from here. And I lost my purpose, and I just don't know. So God brought the right people in my life where I realized that there is so much more that God has in store for my life, and I needed to start with the step of surrendering. Once I surrender, my prayer change. Instead of praying, Lord, help me get through this hour, help me get through this day, I start praying, Lord, I want to help others relieve others of the pain that I carried for so many years. Lord, please put in my path people that are broken, but yet you cannot, you cannot see like um a lot of times people are walking in church or are walking at work and they just smile and they all look happy, but that's at the surface. So that is my prayer. That's how my prayer changed. God, you are the only one that knows my heart, and you're the only one that knows their heart. And I want you to continue to open board doors and put in my path the people that are hurting in silence. I want you to put in my path people that are playing that game of I'm fine every single day, but the truth is they're not fine because it was never a true surrender. So those are the people that um was called to help. So I went and got all the certifications that I need in order to um do that globally, but what changed the most was how I looked at the pain and how my prayer changed. Lord be put in my path those people. And I see people now that I've never seen before, like well, because he reveals that to you.

SPEAKER_02 20:28

So because you asked him, because you got honest with him, and he got honest with you, quite frankly, at that 11-month mark of like, you don't really trust me, you don't really you talk about me, but you don't really trust me. Those are really honest prayers, and I commend you for sitting with it, for opening your heart, for not putting on the armor of pride, because some of us put on that armor and we avoid pain because we're just too proud to ask for help. We don't because the world tells us that if we ask for help, we're weak, and that's not true.

SPEAKER_00 21:09

You said that best. I've never called it pride until after those 11 months. I realized that's what it was. Yeah, that's why I didn't talk to anybody. I said, they're pitying me. I'm not a victim, I don't want to be pity, but it came down in pride, and it did God took those walls down.

Sylvia's Temptation And Presence Practice

SPEAKER_02 21:30

It took a long time, but uh well, and it just to obedience, and that's what most people don't understand. The concept of obedience is not falling into temptation. That's that's a lot harder than it sounds. It's it's an everyday and and when you fall, because we're fallible, right? We're not him, we're not we're not God. So we are gonna fall into temptation and we're gonna fall short of his glory, right? Because he's glorious. But one thing about our Heavenly Father is that He's extremely forgiving. You just must repent. You must sit and say, you know what? I messed up. I am so sorry. And first ask him for forgiveness. And then take it a step further. And if there's any, you know, ownership you need to take with other people, then you do that as well. Because they are your brothers and sisters in Christ. Like I've been doing that exercise since 2024. In 2024, God had me on. I remember watching Passion of the Christ for the very first time. Uh during Christmas. It was the first Christmas without my father. It's December of 2024. And I told myself I was going to be strong enough to watch Christ be crucified. So I could appreciate the sacrifice he made for me. Because up until that point, it was about like shielding myself from the pain, right? Of watching him, my good friend, go through that. But why I think Jonathan Rooney, the guy that has been playing Jesus in the chosen, said it best in an interview. He said, Why are you going to abandon Christ in this greatest hour of need by not watching his sacrifice on television? Like not watching when he gets crucified for you, for your sins, so that you have a place in heaven with God the Father, right? So going back to what everything you discussed, it's in that silence, it's in that obedience that you find your divine calling, that you find the true essence of who you are, because he reveals it to you, because you've asked him for that. I commend you for that honest prayer, for finally removing, allowing him to be the great surgeon and remove the layers of pride from your heart and from the armor, from for allowing you to see who you are meant to help because of the way you've been equipped through the pain to purpose the journey that you've been on. I just want to say that out loud, number one. Number two, I can relate because in November of this past year, there was silence that came from God towards me because I had fallen into temptation. I fell from grace to a degree, not in a horrible way, but in my way, I fell. And I was ashamed to come online to show with my community that I guide and empower as a life coach because I should, in my mind, I should have known better. And and I just like you, I avoided being online. And people notice because usually I'm someone that empowers every single day. And I have messages of hope and joy and love. And in that silence, you know what he told me? I mean, so so you know that this is happening worldwide with people that are actually seeking him. He said, Why are you striving for my love? Why are you trying to achieve my love, Sylvia? See, as a high achiever, I was I was doing all the things to check off a box.

unknown 25:15

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 25:16

And I didn't truly believe who I was in him. I was reading his word, but it wasn't seeping into my consciousness, into my subconsciousness. I was some part of me was still blocked off. It was a dark time this Christmas, in a lot of ways. There were so many storms, so much spiritual warfare, because we know the enemy, when you're at your weakest, will attack the hardest, especially when you are a light warrior like you and I are, where we're trying to bring more light into the world by helping people align to that essence of who they are with confidence, with a spirit of power, love, and self-discipline the way that God has commanded us to do, right? Because he didn't give us a spirit of timidness. You and I, we were doing that whole spirit of timidness, and God was like, that's not who you are. And I need you to understand that you are my daughter first and foremost. You are my child. I have given you the authority, I have given you the confidence and the spirit to lead. And this whole business of you hiding behind these things, that's not, that's gonna stop right now. I mean, that's in essence what he was telling both of us. And I sat with that and I had to, you know what my tagline this year is, Mia, just so you know, pause for presence. Wow. Powerful. Pause for presence. And there I was, pausing for presence, and I had to force myself, like really use all the power within me, the power of him, his authority. I didn't believe who I was in him. And so my honest prayer for those listening, just to kind of compliment what Mia has said, is Lord, give me the eyes to spiritually see what you need me to see about these circumstances I'm currently in. The ears to hear and understand so I can embody understanding, patience, joy, and love, your fruit in my everyday life. And the heart to believe in who and what I am in you, Lord. That's my honest prayer since January 1st of this year. And I've been saying that over and over to him. And the more I read the word, the more he reveals to me about who I am. So who has he revealed who you are, Mia?

SPEAKER_00 27:51

I'd like to know. So I've learned that we all have a story, and we all go through trauma at some point in our lives. That is inevitable. You will go through something at some point. And what I've learned through all of that, that that is just one chapter and some lessons that you need to learn in order to step into who God created you to be. So no matter what you're going through, you have the ability by surrendering to turn that survival and that drama into purpose. So if I take a step back and look at okay, Lord, what what you revealed to me um for me to move forward one word that God gave to me was actually last week. Um it was rest. I grabbed into so many things right now. I said, Okay, Lord, I see it clearly. I know what you want me to do. I I I know the path that you put in front of me. So the continued writing and the keynote speaking and globally life coaching, I know all of that. But I thought that I have to do it all at once. So um I had a like a health um uh scare. So through that, the God revealed me that's like you gotta trust me through this season as well, just because I showed you the path and I know what you want to do. You still have to take time and rest and continue to spend the time in the word so I can continue to give you the wisdom and the grace that you need to help others, and that is one thing I was never taught to do my entire life. That was one thing that I was never taught. Just go, go, go, just overwork yourself, investing in others, do the best that you can, but take a step back and rest and pause and just spend time in the word that it's a new concept for me. So that's why it's being revealed to me. I know it's not the end of my story. I know.

Mia's Book And How To Connect

SPEAKER_02 30:13

No, no, our our end of the story really in this lifetime is when we graduate into heaven. That's our legacy, that's what we're leaving behind. Um you're gonna leave an amazing legacy for those that are watching you right now, especially those that you have impact on and influence on, right? Because he will put those people in your path. You will know who you you are led to to impact and to influence through your work because he will bring them to you. That there's no question about that. Um, any last words of encouragement? And yeah, I if I wanted to work with you and if I wanted to purchase your books, and we went, what are the names of your books? Where can we do you have a website? Just kind of share that information with us.

SPEAKER_00 31:06

So my book is called Um Buried Not Broken. And um it came from when when my sister passed. My therapist asked me to start writing in a journal. I thought I didn't want to do it. I finally started writing in the journal, fast forward a few months later, say you need to publish this. So that's where the first book came. There's a collection of stories um of hardship, abuse, grief, but also resilience and God's grace through every single chapter. So the buried is called the book is called Buried Not Broken, a memoir of survival sisterhood and starting over. And you can find it on Amazon or we have it on Audible, on Kindle, Hardcover, and um paperback. You can also find it in um libraries and uh I know Bart and Noble. Um my website is Mia Godfrey, just like my name, just MiaGodfrey.com. Also, I can be found. I have on LinkedIn, Instagram, and Facebook. It's also Mia Godfrey.

SPEAKER_02 32:24

Any last words of encouragement for the listeners who released out reveal purpose that you want to leave us with?

SPEAKER_00 32:31

Just um surrender. That is the biggest because that was the biggest breakthrough for me. I thought I knew the Bible, I thought I knew God at the personal level, I thought I knew every single step. But the truth is I was still finding on my own to overcome some hardships and trauma. And until the moment you truly surrender and says, God, my life is yours, everything that happened to me, you already knew, you already orchestrated, I need to trust your plan. So that prayer was very real to me, and until I did fully surrender, um I I did not experience the transformation until that surrender happened.

SPEAKER_02 33:25

Powerful words, Mia. Thank you so much for joining us on release out reveal purpose. And the listeners, you know how I usually sign off to remember Matthew 5.14 to be the light. Be that beautiful light that is within you. It that is the spirit leading you into your divine purpose. Be the light like Mia and I have been the light. If we can do it, if we can survive what we've survived, you can do it too. There is no question in our minds that you can thrive. You can learn how to remove the layers of pride from your heart, how to truly get down on your knees and full surrender to the plan. The plan is so much bigger than just our lives, our linear lives. The impact we can have in this world using the divine skills that our Father has gifted each and every one of us with. That is unique to us. Our journey is unique to us, but it's in how we are applying those lessons. That's our impact, that's our influence, that's how we can help others, and that's what we're meant to do in this life. So be the light, don't be afraid, have a spirit of confidence, of power, of love, and you do have the self-discipline to get yourself out of these chapters. Reach out for help. Reach out to Mia if if her story aligns to yours and you felt the presence of the Holy Spirit as you heard her voice, reach out to Mia on her website. Purchase her books, work with her. Everyone has a light. Have a wonderful and safe week. Love y'all. Bye now.

SPEAKER_01 35:16

So that's it for today's episode of Release Doubt, Reveal Purpose. Head on over to iTunes or wherever you listen and subscribe to the show. One lucky listener every single week who posts a review on iTunes. We'll win a chance the grand prize drawing to win a$25,000 private VIP day with Sylvia Worsham herself. Be sure to head on over to release out reveal purposepodcast.com and pick up a free copy of Sylvia's gift and join us on the next episode.