Soul Vibe Insights

The Other Side Of Emotions

• Emily Pearl and Matty Hollingsworth • Episode 23

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In this podcast [episode 23] Emily and I are taking you into the other side of emotions where liberation awaits. We deep dive into what kind of emotions become unresolved and what happens to the body when we bury those denied emotions. As well as how the weight of their denial interferes with your intuition.

This episode is jam packed with helpful tips! So sit back and let us talk you through the process to get to the other side of emotions where liberation is yours to be had! Gaining the higher perspectives from expressing unresolved emotions will free you once and for all. Giving you the emotional intelligence to navigate your environment and the people closest to you with more confidence.

An important tool in the quest for liberation from unresolved, buried emotions is having a sure fire way to clear your energy and protect your aura from unwanted influencing sources and astral entities.

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We'll teach you how with our new course.  Navigating Spiritual Protection with a Divine Co-Pilot

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Share your thoughts and experiences with how you've moved through unresolved emotions to get to liberation and freedom or ask us a question at vibin@soulvibeinsights.com

Loving Light,

Matty and Emily

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Matty:

Hey there, amazing souls, and welcome to today's show. Emily and I want to dive into the other side of emotions. The more you know and work with your emotions, the more liberation you can experience.

Emily:

Hello, welcome. Yes, I definitely think this is one of the biggest misconceptions when it comes to emotions is that, Oh, we have to suppress it or we can't face them. Otherwise something bad will happen. I'm the first to say that it doesn't feel good to face your emotions, but when you are able to work through them, then there really is a large amount of liberation on the other side. It really does free you from yourself, essentially.

Matty:

That's a really good way to put that. I've definitely needed to face things and thought they were a mountain to climb. And once I got in, yeah, it's challenging to face your emotions and to feel through things. But then I realized this wasn't quite the mountain I thought it was. And on the other side of that was growth, transformation, more awareness on what was going on or what had happened in my life. Like you said, liberation.

Emily:

Yeah, I mean, don't get me wrong, there's a lot of screaming and crying. There can be anger and grief and rage involved, but once you can kind of push through that and get to the other side, which is why this is called the other side of emotions then it really does free up a lot of energy in your energy field and I mean it allows you to see clearer just in general.

Matty:

Absolutely. You're not clouded by all these unresolved emotions that are buried there because you're working through it. You definitely can see clearer in your life. I can attest to that for myself personally. So in past shows and probably pretty much just about every podcast show, we talk about having conscious intent towards gaining awareness and looking for a higher perspective when you're having irrational responses to things in your present life and in your present events and situations that are happening. When you realize something's off, we talk about, you know, ask yourself questions. Why am I having this reaction? What's really going on here? What is it about this situation that is connecting me to something else that's creating this intensity with which I'm feeling right now? Because more than likely, there is more than just this present moment that you're actually feeling. You're feeling a backlog of unresolved emotions that are getting triggered by what's happening now. And it's really good to remember, in these moments, this is when you slow down. You check in with yourself. You're looking to empower yourself. Remember that you're the observer having an experience of emotions or thoughts. You are not the emotions or thoughts themselves. So in the most basic energetic form, what are emotions, babe?

Emily:

Emotions are considered energy in motion. So I think that might be part of where they got their name from. Energy in motion. So what do you think happens to this energy that needs a place to move? Like, if you are in a situation where your fight or flight faculties kick in and you just suppress it. You just push it down and you're like, you completely deny that emotion. So where do you think it goes in your body? Scientists used to think that this emotional energy was stored in the stomach or gut, and that would be due to the uneasiness or the digestive issues that people would experience when they have negative emotions like anxiety or stress. But now, it's a more common belief that the emotions can really be stored anywhere in the body. And this was definitely something that was reinforced. And actually, this thought, this pattern of thinking actually changed over my time as a massage therapist. I was a massage therapist for 13 years. And so in the beginning, it was more kind of like, Oh, we don't know. And then kind of towards the end, all of these different scientific, you know, studies came out and they would alert us as massage therapists to tell you, okay, you really need to be a little bit more careful when you're working with people. Because now we believe that emotions can be stored anywhere in the body. And so before you actually discount this theory, or maybe you're not discounting it, but if you are thinking, what, how does that even make sense? I think an example that they gave us was, think about someone who maybe was in an abusive relationship and their partner choked them. Like, I mean, I know this is a terrible thing to think about, but it was something that you can very much Um, just, as a massage therapist, when you're working on the neck, it's a very sensitive area anyway. But, if somebody is having extreme sensitivity, or if they are freaking out and saying, you know, please stop, or just like from some, you know, like some smooth strokes, that aren't even with pressure. Then it could be reasoned that they had some sort of physical trauma to that area and that touching that area could be bringing up that emotional response. That was really something we had to really be conscientious of because people would have emotional releases when, you know, you're working on any part of the body and sometimes it didn't even really seem to make sense to them or to us as the therapist. You know, where you're working on like a calf muscle and that's not making sense. But I mean, maybe that person was in track and their coach was extremely hard on them and, and they pulled a muscle once. And then that, that emotion was stuck in their calf muscle. Or I mean, it could be a disappointment.

Matty:

That they pulled that muscle and couldn't help the team or the coach got pissed at them and stuff, but that injury. So the emotion gets buried there too, as part of that energy.

Emily:

Yeah. And as we'll look at in the next podcast, we can talk about like past life influences and other kind of energetics that could possibly be associated with an injury in this lifetime. But, we are going to keep it more in the now for this one.

Matty:

I wanted to bring something up about the now, my lifetime. I remember you and I talking before we even dated, just in our friendship, and you were letting me know, like, some of this new stuff that was coming out, and Emotions can be held anywhere in the body. And I was starting to go through kind of my childhood trauma process and trying to work with what was coming up and what was stored in my body. And I remember we had sessions where it was just like, hey, I, you're probably gonna trigger me when we get, especially around my hips and things like that.

Emily:

Oh, and your legs.

Matty:

And my legs, remember.

Emily:

You had a lot of issues.

Matty:

How much they would just writhe and just constantly tweak. Like I was struggling and stuff, like being held down and the only thing that could move were my legs that would tweak. And it was just a matter of, hey, just to let you know up front, this may trigger me, but I want to go through this and feel these things and just send love to my body and myself for what's held there. And that I'm actually not trying to bury it. I'm, my adult self can be present for what is held there and feel through these emotions. So that's interesting. You bringing up the massage. I just kind of wanted to point that out. I remember those changes and, you know, purposefully having you come to do massage to help get that stuff moving within me. And we were friends, so I know beyond your professionalism and integrity, you also held a loving space for me as a friend as well. You know, so it was a, it was very, those sessions were very beautiful to me and helped me a ton. To really start to get things moving along and, and let my body know that it didn't have to hold any more, that I was there. And a good friend was helping with this.

Emily:

I enjoyed those trades. I enjoyed my Reiki sessions with you as well.

Matty:

Yeah. Those were, those were good times trading session for session, but just that helped me a lot with the buried emotions and getting things moved. So I wanted to share that.

Emily:

I love you.

Matty:

I love you too.

Emily:

Well, speaking, I feel like that's a good segue for this next part where we're talking about what are high frequency emotions compared to low, lower frequency emotions? I mean, I feel like most of us can conceptualize this in our mind, but what does this actually mean higher frequency versus lower frequency? So I think we all can agree that when you are feeling lower frequency emotions like shame, guilt, grief, Anger. Yeah, anger. These are much heavier emotions and they literally carry weight. So these are lower frequency because they are more dense and they cause contraction within your body. They cause you to cover your heart or slump over your shoulders or, or make fists. Yeah. Or make fists or.

Matty:

Scrunch your nose. Mm.

Emily:

Mm totally.

Matty:

Or on your forehead. Yeah.

Emily:

Or slump. I mean, when you're literally, you know, feeling down or depressed, you won't even sit up straight or stand straight. Totally. You're, you're just be gonna be walking around moping, you know, your head and shoulders. It's because these emotions literally carry weight and they are dense. And then there are the high frequency emotions such as peace, love, joy, enlightenment, and these have a lighter weight on the body and they are actually expansive. They actually cause your energy to expand rather than contract. So you'll know when you're feeling good and you're feeling peaceful or you're feeling love, you've got your head up high. You've got your shoulders up, you're not slumping over.

Matty:

Shoulders back.

Emily:

I mean, you may even be strutting down the street when you're feeling good.

Matty:

Oh, the, the gait of your walk will definitely be different in those vibes than lower vibes. Absolutely.

Emily:

And I mean, you literally feel lighter in your body. People say that when they're in love, they feel like they're floating. And that's not completely out of the realm of what's possible. I mean, you literally are lighter when you're feeling these higher vibrational emotions.

Matty:

So let's talk about the effect of negative emotions on our health.

Emily:

So can I say one more thing?

Matty:

Absolutely.

Emily:

I will say one more thing. What we are trying to accomplish here is not to say only experience high frequency emotions. We kind of made the point earlier and what the whole point of this whole podcast is, is that yes, higher frequency emotions feel better and that is kind of where it feels better to be. But in order to get to that level to where you can experience these higher emotions like more frequently. You have to work through these lower frequency emotions. You can't just deny, deny, deny all this anger, all this shame, all this grief that you're feeling and be like, Oh, I'm peaceful. Oh, I'm all peace and love. It just doesn't really work that way. And so that is literally why this podcast is called the other side of emotions. Because when you can get to that other side, when you can work through them, you like literally you walking through the mud. Through the sludge, through these shitty emotions, there is a rainbow on the other side and that rainbow is you do feel lighter.

Matty:

More and more. Absolutely. Life is all the things and emotions are going to keep coming up, but the more you work through what you're holding onto, the lighter you feel literally. Because you're vibrating what you're holding and it takes energy use on your part to keep something in place, to keep it held there. You start to create patterns around not feeling that or not experiencing that or not triggering that. So you're actually using more energy to hold something in place than it takes to feel through it, to vibrate it, to move it out of your body. And lighten your load, energetically speaking.

Emily:

Well, and not only that, we are talking about the backlog of energies as well. So if you have like this huge backlog, think about it in the way, like if you're talking to your spouse or there's something that happens, like some sort of conflict with your spouse and you're like, Oh, I can't talk to them and you just keep shoving it down. And then the next time it happens, Oh, can't talk about it, shove it down. Next time it happens you just keep shoving it down until you've got this huge backlog of this Angry energy against your spouse because they do this thing that annoys the fuck out of you. Well, if you never talk about it and never move through it one day it's going to come up in this huge explosive way. And of course because you've been shoving it down your spouse is gonna have no freaking clue where this all this anger is coming from because you never brought it up in the first place.

Matty:

They're not going to understand that a behavior of theirs has been annoying you for months or years on end until you just explode on them.

Emily:

Exactly. So we're also talking about working through this backlog of emotions so that the next time, because once you talk about it and you like figure something out and you know your spouse or your partner or whatever's like, Oh, okay. Well, you know, I never realized how annoying that could possibly be. Or whatever, however you decide to work it out, the next time it happens, you won't have the backlog. It'll just be, okay, they're annoying me, and that's okay. It's not like I have this huge backlog of anger at them that comes up all at once. And so I do think it's important to to bring that up. We're also talking about working through the backlog of these negative emotions so that the next time you feel that negative emotion you're just feeling it for what it is and you're not feeling it for you know, the last 20 years of feeling it, or past lives feeling it. And so, I did want to make that point before, you know, we bring up this next part too. Because high frequency emotions are great, but we're not asking you to deny those. We're not asking you to deny your negative emotions to only experience high frequency emotions.

Matty:

It just doesn't work. Even if you think you get a semblance of it working for a moment or a minute, it just doesn't work.

Emily:

Because you're not really feeling those high frequency emotions for what they are. You're feeling them in response to denial of, of lower frequency emotions. All right. So I think I beat that point into the ground. We're not all high vibes all the time over here. We're all about working through what is.

Matty:

We're all about being real wherever that is, wherever we are. And also how to empower yourself because you know, you can do both at the same time. You can be real with your emotions, even when they're low vibes and empower yourself by being real with those emotions.

Emily:

Yeah, that's how you get through them.

Matty:

Yeah.

Emily:

So with that being said, the next part that we really wanted to bring up was the effects of your negative emotions on your health, because they really do impact your health, and especially negative thinking.

Matty:

And we don't mean expressing your backlog, like feeling through your emotions. We mean when you're holding negative emotions in place.

Emily:

Or when you're causing them to persist due to negative thinking. I feel like that's really what we want to bring up is negative thinking. That's literally keeping yourself in this negative headspace and these negative emotions, like in this loop of low frequency emotions. So, I feel like that's really what we want to talk about in this next part, is negative thinking and how negative thinking impacts your mood and your emotions.

Matty:

Emotions affect your endocrine system, affecting your metabolism, your immune responses and your mood. When you have persistent negative thinking, your body thinks it's under stress, and that stimulates your pituitary gland to signal to your adrenals. to release cortisol and it can cause disruptions in your thyroid, sex, and growth hormones.

Emily:

Yeah, and I mean, these hormones affect your entire body. And if that were to happen, because if you're constantly keeping yourself in negative thinking, of course, if it happens once or twice and you're not, you know, this isn't a chronic thing, then your body comes back to homeostasis. But if this is something that you're keeping, you're persisting, constantly going through this negative loop about, you know, how terrible you are, what a failure you are, how you can't do anything right, or, or whatever it may be, then this can really wreak havoc on your body because it throws your hormones all out of whack. And this affects your mind. It affects your direction in life. It causes digestive issues. It messes with your moods, can cause depression, fatigue, trouble sleeping. Just to name a few things. And I mean, we've all heard that stress is bad for you, but stress is such a generic term that can mean So many things.

Matty:

I find it really interesting too that our subconscious mind doesn't know or doesn't dictate the difference between real stress and stress that we're placing on ourselves through our thoughts. And those thoughts create an emotional reaction or response. And like our subconscious, It doesn't know the difference. So when we start to have these continual thinking and our subconscious gets in play and then we're kicking these hormones in play, we can literally do this to ourselves. This isn't just having a response to a stressful situation, we can create that stress by holding this negative loop, these negative patterns, these negative thoughts that create more negative emotions in place, within us. And it gets to be a real slippery slope between wanting to be spontaneous and whatever you're feeling you're feeling. And if it's negative, it's negative. Just feel through it. Understand that it's not you, you're having this experience but if we keep this loop going, we literally get the subconscious in play and then we don't know what's real or what's not real. Stress. So we're just reacting to it all. So this stress that we're inducing that really isn't real, it's not from something that's happening in our environment and that we, we need cortisol and adrenaline kicking in our system to help us. We're creating this loop. I find that vastly interesting that the, the subconscious really doesn't understand what's happening in reality versus what we're creating in our mind from something that probably did happen in reality at some point. And we just keep recreating it and holding it in place.

Emily:

Yeah, but I mean, that's not always true. I mean, if you're telling yourself that you're a failure or something, you know, ridiculous like that, yes, we all have moments where we fail at things, but that doesn't make, that's not who you are.

Matty:

Yeah, absolutely.

Emily:

It's not what is a good idea to identify as either, because as you tell yourself that over and over, you start feeling the flush. You start getting this like flush of heat. And then what, what happens next? You're like yelling at someone else and they're like, what is going on right now? Because you're telling yourself this in your mind. And it's really interesting because the amygdala in the brain is a little almond shaped structure and this part of your brain plays a key role in processing your emotions. Especially these strong negative emotions like rage, anxiety, and fear. So, this part is also the part of your brain that activates the flight or fight response. So, if you're telling yourself, I mean, we'll use that same example, if you're telling yourself, you know, that you're a failure, and then your amygdala goes ahead, and it's like, alright, they're in fight or flight, like, they need some rage! That is why, like, your brain is literally telling you, Okay, now it's time to let that rage out. And what is very interesting is if you constantly keep yourself in chronic stress, it can literally shrink you're amygdala, which leads to depression and anxiety. Like, these are the chronic things that can happen from this chronic stress. So, it's just kind of mind blowing to me that, that we can be this hard on ourselves. That we can hurt ourselves, literally. Like, we can literally cause physical changes in our brain, in our body by being mean to ourselves. So if there's anything you're getting from this at all, just try to have more compassion, try, to just, the next time you have those thoughts about yourself be like, you know what? NO. And think about all the times that you succeeded. Or think about something great you did today. Or just look in the mirror and tell yourself that you love yourself.

Matty:

Yeah, counteract those thoughts.

Emily:

Yeah.

Matty:

Empower yourself.

Emily:

Keep that amygdala big, or it's a little, it's a little piece anyway, but keep it as big as it can be.

Matty:

Yeah. Keep that almond an almond. Don't let it become a pea.

Emily:

Exactly.

Matty:

Well, I'd like to talk about emotions having intelligence, but what happens when emotions are too much. We have many intelligences within us. Our minds are fucking incredible at what they can deduce and think about and come up with answers to wild situations that we're going through. Our minds are super powerful and very intelligent. But we also have our emotions. And our emotions, through our feelings, will let us know if something's right or wrong for us. And sometimes these can be kind of spontaneous things and we'll know right away. But sometimes we kind of have to go through our emotional wave in our process and really feel into something and see if we still feel the same way about it. We also have our intuition for guidance and its own intelligence as well. So, our emotions are pretty freaking amazing. And it's awesome when we can kind of keep them in a spontaneous moment. So when we're in a situation and we're feeling things, our emotional responses are rational. They make sense if we were to stop and think about them. It makes sense to what's going on that we're feeling the way we feel. And we talked earlier that, you know, we've talked in several shows, it's when we're having these irrational responses. When the charge of emotional energy feels like too much if you take a second to just think about it. Why are we having this, this intensity of a reaction? That's when we're looking for awareness and a higher perspective. Because more than likely, there's a backlog of emotions that are getting triggered and, and you're getting flooded with all of this. And not just that moment in time of that situation or event that the reality that you're experiencing in present.

Emily:

Yeah, I mean, and a lot of times when that happens, you're like, Whoa, where did that even come from? It's like almost this unconscious response. And then later when you think about it, you're like, Whoa, that didn't really make sense for what happened. Why did I react like that to that? And then that's when you can start really learning to bring more awareness to your triggers and why.

Matty:

Well, if you allow for your emotions to be intelligent too. Then as the observer, if you're not attaching in the moment to the emotion and the thoughts, then you can realize quicker and quicker. For me, it was, I mean, maybe days later I'd be like, why did I have that reaction again? That seems a little weird. And I had to work my way up to where I could catch myself in the moment, having a big reaction and pretty much have to give myself a time out and be like, take a breath. I need awareness. Why? Oh, I'm, I'm at work right now and I don't really have the time to dive in. Hey, I'll get back to you emotions. I'll check in with you just as soon as I can and with that experience too. So if you don't really literally have the time in that moment to check in with yourself, just make sure that you do when you do have the time. Honor, honor your emotions and check back in when you can.

Emily:

And I do feel like it's interesting to mention that different people that you're around, and will have a different impact on you. And so if you are around someone and you are constantly having these very big emotions then either that person is not correct for you in your life or you all have some very like pent up past life energy.

Matty:

Yeah, there could be karma at play for sure.

Emily:

Yeah, or even karmic energy from this life too at play And so that's just something else, like another layer of awareness to think about. Like, Hmm, is this person healthy for me to have in my life?

Matty:

And that's using your mind to catch patterns, statistics. Like Emily said, why am I always having these kinds of reactions when I'm with this person? What's that about? Are they right for me? Do I need to maybe have less contact with this person? Do I need to reconsider the kind of relationship I'm having with this person? Be it lovers, friends, acquaintances, whatever it is.

Emily:

Yeah. I mean, I've definitely been in past relationships where, man, I was fiery, like all the time and I tried to chalk it up to being a fire sign. I'm a Sagittarius. So this is just the way I am. And then it was, and then now looking back, I mean, Maddie and I have a much even keel relationship where we're not just yelling at each other constantly like I was in past relationships. So it's like, Hmm, what was the effect of that? And. Was that healthy for me? I mean, obviously it wasn't something I wanted to stay in because I eventually got out, but maybe it took a little longer than it should have, but just interesting things to note. Like the effect that who you are when other people are around too is an important thing to bring awareness as well.

Matty:

Yes, it is. So what happens when your spontaneous emotions in a situation or an event are too much for you to process. When the experience in your life is too much to process, they become unresolved emotions and they get repressed and buried within you. You couldn't deal with them, you didn't vibrate them, you didn't honor them. And there's a myriad of reasons why we might not have, but this is the reality is we didn't honor this emotional expression and we pushed it down and buried it within ourselves. And this can be, I mean, obvious things that you consciously can realize, like, that was too much, I pushed that down. I mean, could be going through traumatic experiences. So you can consciously be like, yeah, that, that was some BS. That was too much. I'll have to go back and feel through that. You know, there's hurtful breakups, heated exchanges, like Emily was just saying, you know, fighting a lot. And then that finally breaks up and there's a lot of hurt and anger there. And it might be too much to feel. And you've pushed it down. Deaths from people are like pets that we dearly loved. And it was too much grief to experience. So we experienced what we could and the rest got held in place. It was unresolved. There's also less obvious things, like, when we're in our childhood consciousness, things that we took in as truth from our parents or elders from our experiences. I've got a few examples from things that I used to hear. You know, you make me feel this way. So whatever I was doing, I realized that I was having a negative effect on somebody and my emotions in that situation and what I was doing were wrong. So I I'd bury that and not try to have that again. Or why are you so emotional? I can't stand it when you get like this. Boys should be tough. Just get over it. Things like this that we take on is truth and then we learn to bury our emotions when we're kids. Because we don't have the consciousness to realize that, well, that was uncool, or that was a dick thing to say, or, you know, hmm, I just don't think that's right. I need to have this expression right now. You know, yeah, boys, boys can be tough, but I'm having some emotions and I need to feel through my emotions right now, so I'm going to have those. Like, we don't have quite the level of consciousness or intelligence developed to understand. So we take in these things. We make them truth in our life and we start to repress or bury before we even realize that's what we're doing.

Emily:

Well, and even more than that, you just feel like you're a burden on others. And then that brings a whole other slew of problems as well. When you are going through life, feeling like you're a burden on others. Because, how dare you make me feel that way! That's a very uncool thing to hear. Especially as a child.

Matty:

There's all sorts of loads of whatever, and I'm sure coming from elders and parents and older siblings and cousins and things, like they probably didn't really mean to cause messed up things within a kid. But sometimes the things we say and what gets passed down, we take these things in, so you know, it's not like just as an adult, we experience things that we can't process in the moment and they become unresolved. Sometimes we're literally taught to bury things, or that emotional expression isn't valid, or isn't correct. Or that our emotions are creating someone else's feelings. That they don't like how they're feeling because of the way we're feeling, so then we're taught to bury that. It can be a slippery slope. And when we do this, this is how we create a backlog. It's these unresolved emotions that are buried. And these, in turn, this backlog, it clouds your emotional intelligence. Because now when you're trying to tap into a situation, if you have a backlog around this or something similar, more than likely when you try to feel into something, you're going to have all this other stuff to feel into. So it can be tough to know now when a situation is right or wrong for you, or a person is right or wrong for you. And if you've been bearing these things, this could just be normal. So then you get clouded there on your emotions too, on their intelligence because of the norm. Everyone deals with a backlog of emotions to some extent. They may not have, you know, childhood traumas or crazy things that have gone on, but we all have buried some emotions. It could have happened when we were really young as kids. And we just didn't have the intelligence and consciousness to realize what we were doing in that moment, or that that was just weird that we were being told to not express that or that wasn't right. And then it could very much be things that make sense to us as we think about them, but we all deal with this in some way, shape, or form. And these buried and repressed emotions will get triggered by an energy that is similar to that experience. If not the same kind of experience, it's just maybe different people in your life, but it's triggering those held emotions. And sometimes we create things in our life to help trigger this backlog of emotions because, like I said earlier, we're spending all this energy keeping things buried. And it would just be better if we could feel through it and lighten our load and move through this and get to the other side of emotions where there's more liberation and a higher perspective from it. But sometimes the problem is we get triggered and these things start to feel and what they really need to gain freedom is to be felt and vibrated and moved. But then we deny and bury them again and push them down. And now we've pushed that moment on top of the past and we create even more of a backlog of emotions that we're holding on and bearing within us.

Emily:

Yeah, I think a good example of this could be when, if you've experienced betrayal in like a romantic relationship where you got cheated on or something like that. And then of course that comes with a whole slew of betrayal energy of you lied to me, manipulation, just however it played out. And then in your next relationship, you are just like, Oh, well, they're just going to cheat on me anyway. So, and then it's like, you have that in place. And then if it does happen again, it's like now you're pissed off at them because it's happened more than once now. So you're like bringing your rage from that other time onto your current relationship. And then that will keep happening. This same situation will probably keep happening because if you're coming into the relationship like yep, this is gonna happen, I'm gonna be betrayed, then chances are it will keep happening until you do something to break that pattern.

Matty:

Until you can feel into it and then how

Emily:

you can confront it

Matty:

and get yeah get that awareness that you're actually hurt from the first time and you've been holding that hurt and creating situations to trigger that so the original hurt and anger could be felt and expressed.

Emily:

And I mean, it may cause you to even go after, people in relationships that are emotionally not available so that you can keep playing out this sabotaging frequency, this self fulfilling prophecy. And so this is what we mean by awareness is key, because by bringing awareness, you're like, okay, you know what the next person you're dating, you're like, all right. You know, they seem like a really good person. All right, I'm not going to go ahead and put this burden energy of, Oh, they're just going to betray me onto them because I've worked through it. And now anytime you have those feelings pop up, you're like, Oh God, are they lying to me? Uh, you can just like have a civil conversation about it instead of getting really worked up and like sneaking behind their back and like checking their phone or whatever, you know, may come from that. Yeah. That's why awareness is a wonderful thing, and by working through these emotions, and working through this backlog of energy. Because then you're not coming through with, like, multiple experiences of rage against this one person. You can actually feel it for what it is. I mean, maybe they're trying to surprise you with a secret birthday present or something, you know, that's why they're being a little bit

Matty:

untruthful or not fully telling you what's going on or right. They seem a little off or something in their actions. Cause they don't want to let it slip or

Emily:

it can be a plethora of reasons.

Matty:

Yeah. Empowerment comes from feeling into your emotions. The more you feel into and express, the lighter your emotional, energetic load becomes and in the end, the more liberated you are. And in time, when you can get to that root cause, and you can create healing and forgiveness around, because you've gotten there and you have the awareness now. And you've connected your mental faculties and trying to work with your intuition on what's happening and why are these things in place and what are these feelings about and what's there underneath the surface. You can truly be free of this backlog. And then you can have more spontaneity in your emotional responses in your present life scenarios and situations. And then the true intelligence of your emotions can be used. It really creates so much beauty when we feel into the backlog. When we discover that they're there and we start to work with it and we allow ourself a safe space to do this. It really is about, I mean for me, it really is about becoming liberated and more empowered.

Emily:

Yeah, freeing yourself. Free your mind and the rest will follow. All my eighties and nineties, or that's probably a nineties song. But if you're that old, you might enjoy that or at least recognize it. So this is Soul Vibe Insights and of course, here at Soul Vibe Insights, we like to talk about intuition and intuition development. So, what does emotional liberation have to do with intuition?

Matty:

I mean, if you aren't in touch with your emotions, then they'll run your life. We kind of hit on this before. Unconsciously, you're going to make choices and do things to avoid feeling a certain way or remembering an event in your life. And you're going to spend a lot of emotional energy, mental energy on keeping things in place. And this just kind of mucks things up. You have less energy for tapping into your intuitive guidance.

Emily:

Yes. And if you have this backlog of emotional energy, you will not be able, you will not be seen clearly. You will not be seen clearly in your own life. And you will absolutely not be hearing your intuition clearly or your soul urges. They will just be clouded by all of it.

Matty:

Yeah. I was thinking distorted, but clouded.

Emily:

Distorted. That's a good word. It will be distorted and if this is the case, if there is that distortion available, then you're not going to be able to trust it. Or you're not going to be able to feel like you can trust it. Cause you're like, Whoa, that didn't play out. Uh, I got this guidance and that wasn't even right. But if you're getting distorted guidance in the first place, then it's going to be very difficult. But I don't think it's the guidance that you're going to be getting that's distorted. It's your interpretation of the guidance that gets distorted.

Matty:

Ding, ding, ding, right there. When we view what happened through our intuitive guidance and the actions that we took or didn't take. And we want to point fingers, sometimes at ourselves and our intuitive guidance and our lack of trust in that. It's really the interpretation, when the guidance could have just been putting us in a place where our emotions could get stirred up. So we could feel in and move through them. But we didn't like that, so then we view that as negative. Our interpretation is off. Remember, your intuitive guidance is one of the three main ways, and the biggest of the three. Your higher self, your soul self speaks to you. It's through intuition.

Emily:

And I don't know if everyone's is this way, but mine is super literal, like almost to a comical degree. Like for example, I was writing an email to the DMV to get new tags. And so I had everything on there. You know, I had the VIN number. I had a picture of the license plate. They ask you to forward some maintenance records, so you have to do like a scanning scan of that. I get my pendulum out and I'm asking my guides, okay, do I have everything that I need in this email? And I'm and I get a yes, like a big swing. Yes. And, is there anything else that I need to do? And I keep getting, yes! And I'm like, okay, well, if I have everything, and there's, but there's still something else I need to do. And I'm like, okay, well, what is it? What is it? And I'm like, racking my brain, trying to figure out, like, Okay, well, if I have everything, In the email, but yet there's still something else I have to do. And then I just hear push send. It's like, and I just laugh to myself. Okay, well, that's definitely something else to do. But I'm here thinking, Oh, well I need to include something else. But just like, well, push send. That's the thing you need to do. Just cracked me up.

Matty:

Thank you for sharing. It's cracking me up too.

Emily:

I feel like we've definitely kind of made these points that if you're in a highly emotional state, then I mean, you're literally, that's all you're thinking about is what is putting you in this highly emotional state. You won't even be able to really have clarity for your intuition because, you know, your guides aren't going to be able to get in there. Your higher self isn't going to be able to reach through that curtain and get your attention because you're here, you know, in these lower vibrational emotions. Like going in circles and ruminating and you know, whatever the case may be. So that's one of the really good things about the higher vibrational emotions is that you will be able to hear your intuition better when you are in a higher vibrational state. And if you think about it this way, your guides, they're just chilling in this higher vibrational state. So if you're like in this lower vibrational state, there's nowhere for the, there's no bridge that can be made, because you're vibrating at too low of a state. So that's why, you know, a lot of people that are in the spiritual realm are like, Ooh, high vibes. Well, that is one of the very positive things about high vibes, because if you can bring yourself into those higher vibes, you can Then you will be able to hear your guides more clearly because the bridge, they don't have to jump down so many frequencies to get your attention.

Matty:

Yeah. I mean, when we're going through these lower vibrational frequencies, and we're in those negative thinking loops and emotional loops, we can feel powerless sometimes to do anything about it. And we're also expending so much energy on it. And then we're creating stress hormones in our body to add to the stress and anxiety that we're already feeling. It's a pretty powerful loop to try to break out of to take time to like tap into your intuition. Like Emily says, you know, to try to tap in and for your intuition to jump down to get your attention. So this is when you have to have that experience, the mental toughness to realize, well, I'm on a negative loop here. There's too much of this, is this where my spontaneous emotions are because of my reality and my circumstances and situation? Do I need to just feel through these and then I'll get to someplace else or am I in essence kind of creating this loop and I need to hit pause? This is a great time if you have a energy clearing practice like our course, Navigating Spiritual Protection with a Divine Co Pilot, to learn how to clear your energy and protect your auric field. This is the time to time out, go through an energy clearing protocol.

Emily:

Well, and that literally raises your vibration, too.

Matty:

Well, and it creates a parasympathetic nervous response that actually, through breathing techniques, tells your body that you're safe, you're okay. Calm's a good place to be. This is our natural state, if you will. So this is great when you can catch yourself in these negative loops and then you've got the tools. To actually calm, reset, and then it makes it so much easier to then tap into your intuition. To not have to jump up from so many vibrations of emotions to try to get into higher vibes. You've already kind of cleared the slate, reset things. Giving yourself a huge step up towards higher vibes. Towards at least feeling even keel. And at that point you can start to work more with your intuitive guidance. Tap into your higher self and tap into those other intelligences within you.

Emily:

And you really do need a pretty good amount of focused energy in order to tap into your intuition and your guides. I think if anyone has ever tried to meditate, you know, in the very beginning, it can be very frustrating, because it's very hard to quiet your mind, but then, you know, with practice, you get better and better. But it does take that degree of focus in order to hear your higher self. You do need to be able to quiet your mind. And if your mind is running haywire on emotional energy, then it will be hard to have that focus.

Matty:

Absolutely. So becoming cognizant of our emotions and understanding and working through your triggers is pretty much a must do in order to be intuitive and to hear your intuition and your soul urges. So honey, would you like to walk us through like, how do you work through your triggers?

Emily:

Yeah. So I just kind of put this little list together and just kind of flowed through me. But of course the very first thing that you want to do in order to work through your triggers is become aware of them. Because obviously you cannot work through something that you are not aware of. And awareness usually happens because you're triggered, and you have this emotional response to it. So, it's not exactly the most comfortable thing. This is not the most comfortable step. Becoming aware of what your trigger is. Like, what just triggered me? And it could be something someone says. I know that I used to have, you know, a high degree of jealousy and especially in the beginning of our relationship in the beginning, uh, and especially like in past relationships. And I won't go in, you know, to all the reason why, because they're. I could be talking for, you know, a little bit on that, but I had a lot of jealous energy. And one of the things that would come up is like Matty would maybe do something and I would feel this jealous energy come up, but then I would feel shame. Because I knew that I didn't feel, I would feel shame because I didn't feel like I was worthy to feel that way because he wasn't doing anything in order for me to feel that way, but I was still feeling that way. If that makes sense. I was still having this jealous response, but then I was shutting it down because I'm like, Oh, well, I'm not allowed to feel this way. There's no reason I should feel this way. And then that shame caused a whole other plethora of issues. where I would storm out and slam doors and all kinds of stuff. I've come a long way, luckily. So becoming aware of what triggers you and, you know, asking yourself questions of what does this remind me of? Like, what in my past does this feeling make me think of? Because a lot of times you could be going to that other memory.

Matty:

Because the present situation may only be helping to trigger what's buried. And it may not necessarily be that present moment that's really giving you that charge. But, there’s something about that energy and that situation that is triggering those buried emotions that is having the avalanche response and this like intensity that's coming up. So be willing to assess whether or not it really is in that moment that's creating all this or is that moment helping to trigger and then what is it triggering within us?

Emily:

Exactly, which is the next step, which is identification. So once you become aware of what triggered your response, you want to try to identify what emotion, you know, you're feeling in that response. And so there are lots of emotional charts. Um, I know we include one in our course that Maddie was talking about because it's important to get in touch with your emotions when you are working with your intuition. And so when something triggers you, you want to identify what that emotion was so that you can start to really know yourself and know what it feels like when certain emotional responses happen.

Matty:

And the next is processing. Processing the emotions in an appropriate and healthy way and only you know what's appropriate for yourself. Processing means you're giving life to those emotions. You're feeling them. You're vibrating them. You might be speaking, yelling, screaming, crying, who knows what, but you're giving them vibration. You're giving them your attention. You're honoring them. You're moving them. You might need to shake your body.

Emily:

Yeah, this could be journaling. This could be taking a shower and just crying, screaming and crying in the shower. Definitely done that a few times. I know Matty used to hold up a, we used to hold up a pillow for each other and we would just punch the shit out of it when we were super frustrated.

Matty:

I would have to double hold couch cushions because Emily would be punching so hard. I couldn't just hold up a pillow or one couch cushion. I used to have to take two of them, babe.

Emily:

My dad taught me how to punch when I was a kid.

Matty:

Yeah, well, it stuck with you. And I would, I just want to say one more thing about healthy. And in this moment, you may have someone else that's wrapped up in this and you may need someone else to help you with this expression or they really need to be a part of it. Or in this case, Emily and I supporting each other by holding up couch cushions. You know, we're just holding a space for an emotional reaction and just letting Emily go wherever she needs to go and just hold a space for her. You may need to do these things alone because if you have a bunch of buried anger and rage, and I went through that with my childhood traumas, I had tons of it. I didn't want to create karma by just raging at other people and you know, blowing my top off at people that didn't deserve it, that had nothing to do with it. So I bought a punching bag. I started playing first person shooter video games called Call of Duty and Halo. And I just imagined somebody's head was on the head of everybody else on the screen that I was fighting against. And I worked through anger and rage this way until I got to a point where I didn't feel so angry and I was ready to get into the fear and the sadness. I had to work through a lot of that stuff. So you just kind of have to figure out what's appropriate and healthy for you. And is that a solo emotional expressions? Is there someone that can help you with these things, you know, so only you are going to know best there. But I did want to put that out there that. You know, it may be something you need to do alone and just have to determine like what you're feeling and How best to do that and not create karma for yourself.

Emily:

Yeah punching the bed. Doing like a kickboxing video on youtube. Um, I mean hit training has been great for us. I've tried not to use it as an anger outlet though because I want to really be in my body and use it as a positive expression, but there are some times that there were a couple times frustrations get worked out. Sure, that it definitely helped with frustrations. Running, taking a walk in nature and just allowing yourself to just be. Maybe listening to your favorite pump up song or mix.

Matty:

Hugging trees. They have deep roots into Mother Earth. Ask a tree if you can share your emotions with it and what's going on. And if it'll help you absorb some of those and move them for you and ground them into Mother Earth.

Emily:

Oh, that's a good one.

Matty:

Yeah, I've done that before. I've had moments where I'm just shaking mad, holding and hugging a tree, and like, furious, and the tree's just like, I got you, bro. You just hold on. And then that turns into me crying, and like, softening, because my loving space was being supported by a tree, whose roots ran into Mother Earth deeply. I don't know if you remember that one walk we used to do at Richmond Hill all the time.

Emily:

Oh yeah, I know exactly which tree you're talking about.

Matty:

That huge, that huge pine that we couldn't quite even like touch hands when we held. I used to do that solo.

Emily:

That's exactly the tree that I saw. Yeah. When you were saying that.

Matty:

That tree's helped me through some things.

Emily:

I love lots of trees, but that tree we definitely hugged on lots of occasions.

Matty:

Yeah.

Emily:

Stomping your feet could be another one as well. As long as you don't do it so hard that you hurt your shins. But I think we have brought up, you know, a good amount of ways that you can process emotions in an appropriate and healthy way. And that's a really good thing to do. You want to work through these emotions because you want to get them out of your body. It's very important to move them through your body and to get them out. That's why a lot of the things that we brought up are physical things. And crying, that's a wonderful thing to do, especially, you know, if you're holding onto a lot of grief. It helps with anger, sadness. I mean really it helps with everything. I've definitely found myself crying for lots of different reasons.

Matty:

Basically, we've buried unresolved emotions in our body and we're holding them in place, without movement, so we want to move in some way. Even if that's, like Emily mentioned, journaling, that's a movement. Crying's a movement.

Emily:

Dancing. Dancing's a movement.

Matty:

Right, yeah. Punching things. I mean, just whatever it is, however it feels healthy and safe to you. Move. Give it your vibrating voice and move it. That's the point of movement is because you're holding it in place, buried in your body, where it can't move. And to honor that emotion, to feel that emotion means to give it movement, to express it in some way.

Emily:

Yes. And a lot of times you'll feel a lot better after this. But, if you wore yourself down because you've had a lot of anger, sometimes, you know, you may need to have a nice rest or some sleep. And then you'll feel lighter after moving these emotions in your body.

Matty:

Even if you don't move all the way through the backlog and you need many, many, many sessions of emotional movement. I personally can attest, I felt lighter each time and it got easier. And it helped my bravery in going in to re experience to go through my emotions that I hadn't felt because I had done it before. And I felt better and now I have proof in my reality. Whoa, okay, that wasn't quite the mountain I thought it was. I can do this. I even did that myself. Oh, I can do this when I've got support. Cool. And you just get better and better at it and you get lighter and lighter as you do it. There really is more liberation each time. As you move your emotions out of your body, you're liberating your body, holding them. And then in time, you're liberating your mind and your emotional body. And wild, cool, crazy things can happen when we really get liberated and we get to the point of finding out the root cause, changing perspectives, healing things. And we're going to get into that in next week's show.

Emily:

Yeah. And I just want to bring up one more step. I feel like this step is important because this is not a perfect process. When you're dealing with emotions, there is no perfect way just to eliminate. That is not the goal. The goal is not to eliminate emotions altogether. The goal is, in this last step, is you start to remind yourself the next time it comes up. And then you begin the process over with the awareness, with the identification, and the processing of the steps. And, I mean, this reminding process comes with a lot of self compassion. This is where you begin to really try to practice self compassion. And that is what's going to help you move through these emotions in a healthier, non detrimental way. And the goal is to lessen the response to the trigger. That is the goal. And I mean, if one day you don't have a response at all to the trigger, that's incredible. But the goal is to lessen the response, lessen the fury, lessen the rage. Lessen the amount of emotional response that you have to the trigger. That is the goal.

Matty:

And in doing this work it actually makes it easier for you to handle the spontaneous emotions that are coming up in your present reality, whether you are or are not getting a trigger. As you lessen these triggers when they come, but if you're not getting triggered, it's easier to handle what's going on. And you'll have less moments where you're like, this is too much to process, I'm going to bury these unresolved emotions. And we don't really consciously think that, it just happens, but that will happen less and less because of the more emotional work you do. You actually become stronger at processing your emotions in the moment because you're working through a backlog of them. Because you're doing this work. So you create less of backlogs like this as you work through them too, because you're able to handle so much more in your life as it's coming up.

Emily:

And if you have experienced any of these things that we've mentioned, just know that you are not alone. This is definitely part of the human condition. And just know that we love you and we're sending support energy your way as you move through your emotions and move through this process.

Matty:

If you've got any questions or want to share your experiences, feel free to email us. There's always a link in the description of every show with our email. We'd love to hear from you. We really do enjoy when y'all reach out and tell us a few things and what's going on in your world too. Part of why we podcast is to connect with you and not just us talking to you. So feel free to connect right back with us. Thanks for joining us today, y'all.

Emily:

Yeah, thanks so much for joining us.

Matty:

And stay tuned for next week. We're going to dive into emotional energy that we carry from past lives, epigenetics from our ancestors and a couple other things. We're going to get into some sharing of some wild stories of healing through emotional movement. And when you get on the other side of your emotions and you're liberated, what can change in your reality!

Emily:

Yeah, the magic can happen.

Matty:

It's pretty freaking cool. And we're gonna share a couple things with y'all next week about that. So stay tuned. And in the meantime, have a wonderful week. We love ya.