Faith Unmuted With Esther Graham
This is the place where Christian women get the opportunity to press the button and say what they want, how they want and exactly how they feel.
The one place where, together, we can collectively walk through our truths, live unapologetically and stop hiding.
Esther Graham has being in ministry all her life and has felt silenced from all the labels and responsibilities that come from being a pastor's daughter to the unexpected role of being a pastor's wife. This journey has not been easy nor has it been just. Esther no longer wants to hid nor lower her voice.
On this podcast, Esther shares what happens when you use your voice and shares the stories of overcoming the stereotypes and living unapologetically.
Faith Unmuted With Esther Graham
Transforming Adversity with Faith and Meditation
Have you ever wondered how to stay positive in a world that seems dominated by negativity? I promise you'll gain invaluable insights on this episode of Faith Unmuted, where I begin to unpack the crucial tools for maintaining a positive outlook amidst adversity. From personal stories about navigating difficult business relationships to the transformative impact of prayer and meditation, I cover the essential elements of setting healthy boundaries to protect your mental and emotional well-being. Discover how surrounding yourself with uplifting individuals and practicing gratitude can shift your perspective and bring about significant change in your life.
In this discussion, I delve into the power of personal resilience, beginning your day with quiet contemplation, and staying true to your values, even in the face of challenging situations. Reflecting on a tough meeting, I reveal how centering yourself can help manage emotions and respond constructively, leading to personal growth. I also explore the profound effect of living unapologetically and challenging ourselves to ask the crucial questions that propel us forward.
Ready to embrace faith and self-expression? Visit www.esthergraham.com to continue this journey, share your thoughts, and spread the message to friends.
You are listening to Faith Unmuted. The place where Christian women get the opportunity to press the button and say what they want, how they want and exactly how they feel. The one place where, together, we can collectively walk through our truths, live unapologetically and stop hiding.
Speaker 2:How to live up in a down world. It's not just global, but it's even also very, very personal, and it's a question that I have had to ask myself, simply because of so many challenges that we face. We face challenges in our personal lives, in our business, our careers, and then, of course, when we're looking at the world, there's so many things that's going on that if you pay attention and you take it all in, you would really be living in a down spiral world. You know there's wars going on, people are hating on each other. You know there's all kinds of discrimination. You know, and while many things that was happening, discrimination has always been there. It's been overt. Now it's very covert. You know we're living in a cancel culture. You know, if you don't agree with me, I don't agree with you, if we don't have the same belief systems, then you get canceled out. And it's not, it's everywhere. It's everywhere. So no one is void of it, no religion is void of it, no denomination is void of it, it is everywhere. And everyone, everyone is critical or they're down about something, they don't have anything positive to say. And so the question is then how do we live up in a down world? Things that I've experienced and what I have had to do just to make sure that I stay up when everything else around me may be falling apart and I really don't know what to do about it or how to even address it. And this is in, you know, my personal life, my business. And this is in my personal life, my business, my community and even when I'm looking at things in the world.
Speaker 2:One of the darkest moments I had in my life, which I thought everything was just going down, was as a business owner. I hired someone to operate my business and they were doing a great, great job and then something just snapped, something happened and that great job was not being done anymore. And I remember just going through months and months of things happening and trying to figure out how was I going to face it, how was I going to deal with it? I was at the brink of losing my business not good and every time I would try to talk to this person, it was always Debbie Downer. It was always. They saw everything negative, nothing was good, everything. Even if I would try to bring the positive and say, well, let's try to do this, let's do this, it was always. Always something was wrong. Something was always going down. It was always so negative and I just you know, after a while it just began to affect me.
Speaker 2:And that's what will happen when you know you're so, when you're always around people that live a pessimistic life all the time, or they never see the good, they always see the bad, or you're always around that person that if you don't agree with them, then you're the wrong one. You know you're wrong and they cancel you out. They cancel your thoughts out, they cancel your opinions out. You're insignificant now because why you don't agree with me. And that's the world that we live in, and the bad part about it is that it's affecting us in every area. It's all over, it's all over, and so we have no choice but to live in it. So then, how do we deal with it?
Speaker 2:And one of the ways I found in my own situation. I could give you several, several stories, but this one in particular, in my business, where I was just watching things just fall apart, trying to fix it as much and trying to really be there for my leader, including her in things, always bringing the positive, when everything was always negative and negative. And so what I had to personally do to just move forward was really begin to refocus my attention on what was important. What was important to me had to refocus my attention on what I wanted to accomplish. I began to look at the boundaries, my healthy boundaries, and so I began to set healthy boundaries, and the boundaries even meant the communication that took place, one of the most important things for me in living up in a down world, especially when everything around you is just seems to be falling apart and even you could look at the news and you sometimes someone said to me they look at the news just to maybe to get some own peace in their life, and I was like, wow, just think about that. You look at the news where it's all down to get peace in your life. That means that sometimes your life may be in that much, that much shambles that you feel as if you don't have control, that much shambles that you feel as if you don't have control.
Speaker 2:And so one of the things when I begin to think about it for myself, I just begin to go to a place of prayer and meditation. I have to find that quiet place I have to, where it's just me and my God and myself. I guess that's me, myself and I and my God, and we have to have conversations. In my quiet place I do a lot of meditation. I begin to think about the things that brings me joy and brings me peace. I may have something to read, I read a scripture, and I may have a scripture posted to where I just can keep repeating it all the time to remind me of who I am and where I am and what I'm doing. I begin to be grateful for the things that come into my life and I begin to speak something, so those things that I'm speaking can come into my life.
Speaker 2:I choose who I hang around. I don't hang around people that are always negative. I chose people who are moving forward, despite what may be going on in their lives or in the world. I chose people who can speak life into me. I choose people who are ready to talk about the positive and not focus on the negative. I choose people who will bring joy to me, who will bring happiness. And it's not that we don't have real conversations and it's not that we're living in this world that, oh, we're just going to block out. You know we're not. You know flower kids, you know where. We're just going to focus on the positive. No, no, no, we're reality, but it's bringing the reality in of joy and peace and happiness.
Speaker 2:It's saying this is what I want in my life, and so this is how I could influence a negative world, a world that's going down or it appears to be going down. This is what I can bring to the table. It's choosing to see the good things that's happening and being grateful for all those good things. It's waking up every morning and doing mindfulness activities and being grateful for the day that you've been blessed to have. That's how I live up in a down world. Live up in a down world. It's deciding in the morning, when I wake up, and being very intentional about how my day is going to go.
Speaker 2:And what I have found for myself is that when I don't take that personal time, when I don't take that time in the mornings to pray and to meditate and just set some rules for myself, some limits for myself, then I allow others and other things and things that are happening to control my day. And so you have to control your day. Basically, beginning in the mornings, I have a rule that I don't want to be disturbed before 9 am If there's a meeting that I control. My meetings never start before 9 am. My days I may be up, I'm up, but until 9 am my day belongs to me. It belongs to what I want to do. It's my coffee, it's my prayer, it's my meditation. If I choose to listen to the news, that's what I listen to, but I always focus on what's going to lift me up and not what's going to bring me down. It's my time to have conversation with my husband. It's my time to really think through how I want my day to go. That's how I live up in a down world. That's so important because I have to be very intentional about setting that time. Very intentional because if I'm not, then it will be taken away from me, or I'll give it away, because sometimes we give those things away.
Speaker 2:I take the time to look at what is it that I really value? There's a word that I love, a saying that I love, that says where your treasure is, that's where your heart will be, in other words, what you value. I read it this morning in my quiet time, in my devotions, as I sat with my daughter and she said oh, this is really good, read this. And I read it and it brought back memories. Yeah, where my treasure is, that's where my heart will be. In other words, where what I value, that's where my heart will go. So you want to begin to think about what is it that I really value? What do I want to really come into my life? I value my children. I value my family time. I value my personal time. I value my God.
Speaker 2:When I begin to think about what I value, that's where my heart goes to. That's what I want to do. I value people. I value loving, I value serving, and I don't want to do it on a mediocre level. I want to do it on a high level. I want to do it on a deep level. I value being present, and the first thing I have to do is understand that I need to be present with me first. How do I live up in a down world? I show up authentically every single time. I show love, even in the worst situations. How do I live up in a down world? The time that I need to go away and step away from the world, I do that and I take the time to cry. If that's what I need to go away and step away from the world I do that and I take the time to cry if that's what I need to do. I take the time to have some deep conversations with myself. I take the time to evaluate where I'm being authentic, where I'm not, where I'm in integrity, where I might not be. I begin to look at what are the things I value, what are my core values and what do I want to bring in.
Speaker 2:And so, in my business, when I was going through this situation with my leader there, I really had to step away. There I really had to step away. I remember the day that they came in to work and I sat to meet with them and our discussion that they led off with was I will be leaving. And I remember I didn't know how I felt about that. I had conflicts of feelings. You know and know what was going on, and I sat there and what no one knows is that I fought back tears Because this particular leader wasn't just a leader to me, she's family, because this particular leader wasn't just a leader to me, she's family. And I knew that them leaving would bring a bridge in the family, and I also knew that the bridge would be hard to rebuild or to mend, might not be impossible, but it would be extremely hard and I really had to think about what my role was going to be in that and how can I live up in everything that was happening in my business, with them as a you know, with my leader in my family. What was I going to do? And as I sat there and fought back the tears, and as they walked out the door and slammed the door, I sat there for a moment and I said God, what next, what now? Because that moment alone. Have you ever had that defining moment? That's, that's going to define everything your business, your family, your life, just everything. And at the moment, honestly, what else was going on in the world did not really matter, because that is what was going on in my world.
Speaker 2:I often think that if that morning, if I did not go into my quiet time, if I didn't pray, if I didn't meditate, if I didn't encourage myself, if I didn't speak to myself, if I did not go into my quiet time, if I didn't pray, if I didn't meditate, if I didn't encourage myself, if I didn't speak to myself, if I didn't look in the mirror and say Esther, you've got this, god's got you, you've got this. You can do this. You can have this meeting. Yes, it's going to be tough, yes it's going to be hard, but you got this. If I didn't sit and just really begin to speak to myself, I probably that day in that meeting, later on that morning, would have snapped and it would have dictated what I did. My response to it would have dictated the outcomes. So, as they walked out and I sat there and tears rolled down my eyes out and I sat there and tears rolled down my eyes, I wiped my tears and I got up and I went out to face my staff and I said there will be a change in management, there will be a change in leadership. I'll let you know what will happen.
Speaker 2:And I wrote a letter in the midst of my anger, because I can't lie and tell you that I wasn't upset. I was pissed off, I was hurt, I was pissed off, I was, I was all these emotions going on in my head and while I have one side with all of the emotions, I've got the other side with. What is it that I value? What can I do? How could I face this? Yeah, told the rest of the staff. I wrote a letter to all of the families saying that there's going to be a shift.
Speaker 2:From that day to this day, I have worked profusely on me, on what I value, to stay up in a down situation Because, while everything else is going on in the world, if I could begin to control my own world and how I react and how I face it, then I believe that I can control or at least be able to have the right perspective with everything that's going on, or at least be able to have the right perspective with everything that's going on. And so when I see this person and I still see them, not often I have to speak to myself so I could remain up, so I could remain positive, so I could remain powerful in my thoughts. And I wouldn't be able to do it if I didn't spend that time in prayer and meditation, if I didn't spend that time filling my cup and realizing what's valuable to me, being grateful, being thankful. I wouldn't be able to do it at all. I wouldn't be able to stand up and say this is wrong and this cannot be tolerated anymore.
Speaker 2:I realized that one of the greatest things that happened was when they left. It was when they left they did me a favor. That's the good thing, and so I'm grateful for that. The bad thing is that there's no relationship there and there's nothing I could do about that Except to pray and to continue holding my values dear to my heart and to keep walking and to keep moving.
Speaker 2:I made a decision that, as much as I can, that I'm going to reach further, I'm going to go deeper, I'm going to live higher. That's it. And what I'm not going to do is let everything that's going on in the world bring me down, and that's how I'm going to live up. I speak the words that will lift me up and lift others up. I've made a choice that I'm going to always see the glass half full instead of half empty, because I know it's according to my perspective.
Speaker 2:And if I change my perspective, if I change my mindset, if I change some of the way I view things, if I say I don't know what's going on in that person, but I know that they need to be healed, and so if I begin to pray for them, like I pray for the world and everyone else, then it begins to change my perspective and that I could live up in a down world. That's the world, the external world, that's the internal world and that's right, right where you live, in your community, even in your home. That's how you live up in a down world, and it begins with you. It begins with you being true to yourself. It begins with you being true to yourself. It begins with you knowing what you value. It begins with your quiet time, when you spend time with just you and your God. Yeah, that's it. That's it. It works, y'all, it works, it works.
Speaker 1:Wasn't that episode amazing Living unapologetically. Faith unmuted has allowed us once again to ask ourselves the kind of questions that will help us get to the next level and live this life unapologetically. Your next step head on over to wwwesthergramcom and let me know what your favorite episode is Ask a question or share this with a friend. I can't wait to be with you next week as we dive deeper into redefining what it means to be a Christian woman and redefining what it means to live in our truth.