Speaker 1: 0:01

Hello and welcome back to another episode of Train for a Great Life, where we dig into things that truly matter fitness, family finances, and not just for the sake of success, but to build something deeper and a life that feels good from the inside out, rep by rep. You are there, he is. You're absolutely going to hear my little guy, calvin, in the background. He is five months old and just kind of learning that making sounds is pretty fun, so don't be distracted, it's pretty cute. Today I want to talk about something that rattles around in my head from time to time. It's the subject of a book I'm reading right now and a great interview that I saw recently. Have you ever noticed how we've made happiness and achieving happiness a moving target and very outwardly focused? I don't think we're on a good track with that. Some examples vehicles are bigger, houses are bigger, people think. You know people need and want more. Jewelry sales are up since the boom of social media in the 2010s. We chase careers and fitness goals and money and success and admiration, all with the belief that once we finally get there, we'll feel complete, like happiness is a prize at the end of this effort. But what if the prize doesn't deliver. Okay, the interview that I saw, you may have seen it as well.

Speaker 1: 1:25

Scotty Scheffler, the world number one in golf, three-time major winner, a literal master of his craft, sat down in a pre-tournament interview this week and basically said this life does not fulfill me. There's Calvin and he wasn't being negative, he was being real. He said I have worked my whole life to become great at this. I went at the Byron Nelson at home. This feels amazing. I hug my family, I cry a little bit, I feel the joy and then we are figuring out what to eat for dinner and that's it. He wasn't diminishing his accomplishments. He loves golf, he loves to compete, compete. But he said outright this is not the place to look for your satisfaction.

Speaker 1: 2:07

The interview went on and people at first didn't know how to take him. Is he being serious? Is he joking? Is he ungrateful? But if you listen to the words he's saying and rid your mind of the idea of this mega rich, world-class athlete saying that he doesn't derive meaning from the thing that got him rich, there may just be something there. He should, by all accounts, be happy all the time. Of course he's not. He went on to say this is not a fulfilling life from the deepest places of your heart. He even said if the game ever got in the way of him being a good husband or father, he'd walk away no hesitation. Look around how many people grind endlessly in their work, in the gym, in business, hoping for the one big win to finally feel like enough. Maybe it's you. I bet it has been at least a few times, if you're being honest with yourself. I know it has been for me. And yet here's someone who has achieved it all in his field saying it's not enough, not on its own.

Speaker 1: 3:20

One of the books I'm reading right now is called Happy, sexy Millionaire by Stephen Bartlett. The title is kind of funny, definitely eye-catching, but basically he goes on to tell the story of becoming super rich, well-known and externally successful, only to realize that he was still anxious, insecure and still felt hollow. He says something powerful. The life that I was chasing was making me miserable and the version of myself that I became in that chase I didn't even like. Both men Bartlett and Scheffler got the thing that they were supposed to want, but instead of euphoria they found emptiness. Here's the beautiful part, and it's the real message behind Scheffler's words that I don't want us to miss.

Speaker 1: 4:09

Because while he said winning isn't fulfilling, he also did share what is His marriage, his family, his faith, the joy of showing up as a husband, soon to be dad. He said if he had to choose between golf and being there for his family, it's not even a question. He finds meaning in how he treats people, in the way he lives his life, in being grounded in something deeper than performance, still works hard, still trains, still loves the challenge, perfecting his craft, but he's not pretending that it fills his soul, and there's such an important distinction there. Success can be very rewarding, but it doesn't have to be your source of happiness, and it shouldn't be so. It kind of got me thinking. What are we collectively aiming at? Are we chasing success or depth? Do we feel? Do we believe we'll feel better once we finally hit a goal, weight, or get a promotion or build a business? And okay, and then what? What's for dinner? Let me offer this.

Speaker 1: 5:19

True fulfillment lies in the quiet corners. It's stuff that doesn't get headlines and it's stuff that you wouldn't post to social media. It's the moments just for you. It's being present with your spouse, truly present, like those moments where you both are on the same wavelength, that nothing else is going on, nothing else matters. It's laughing with your kids uncontrollably. It's building a life with intention. It's feeling peace in your own skin, whether you have won or lost that day.

Speaker 1: 5:54

In Happy Sexy Millionaire, bartlett talks about how we've been chasing the wrong metrics money, beauty and fame. But the people who actually have those things are often no happier. Sometimes they're even more miserable. Miserable because they are caught in the conundrum that they think they should be happy. But why? Happiness isn't about getting everything that you want. It's about being someone that you like while doing something that matters. Scheffler said he loves the game, loves what he does. But he also said this sometimes I just don't understand the point. The feeling of winning doesn't last that long, not more than a couple of minutes. So where does he find meaning? He answered that pretty clearly Family, love, character, purpose and his faith. Thank you for hanging out today. If this stirred something up in you, shoot me a message. Share with a friend. Let's keep having these conversations. Let's redefine what it means to win. The goal isn't just an outwardly appearing successful life. It is a great life on your terms and it has to be trained for. See you in the gym.