Rejection is a Gift: How to find Purpose and Growth in Every No

Rejection hurts, doesn’t it? Whether it’s an agent or publisher’s ‘no thanks,’ a bad review, or disappointing book sales, rejection and negative reviews can feel like a blow to the heart. 

But what if rejection isn’t a setback but a steppingstone? What if that negative review is a gift?

In this episode, we’ll flip the script on rejection, exploring how to see it as an opportunity to refine your craft, write better books, and move closer to your dream of thriving as a Christian writer. 

You’ll learn why rejection doesn’t define your calling, how it can propel you toward excellence, and why God uses every ‘no’ to prepare you for His bigger ‘yes.’ 

If you’re ready to turn rejection into a tool for growth and success, this episode is for you.

👉 Listen now to find purpose and growth in every 'no'!

Transcript

Rejection and discouragement.

Two experiences that can knock the wind out of any writer.

Whether it's an agent who never returns your calls, a publisher saying no thanks, low book sales, or a crushing one star review, they have a way of hitting us where it hurts the most.

But what if there was another way to look at rejection?

What if the very rejection you fear is the tool God wants to use to refine you, to strengthen your faith and to prepare you for something far greater than you can imagine?

Because here's the truth I'm going to expand on for you in today's episode.

Rejection does not define your calling. God does.

So grab your coffee, your bible, and maybe a journal. Because we're going deep into how to not just survive rejection, but to use it to grow as a writer and deepen your faith.

This is episode 11.

I'm Urcelia Teixeira, ex real estate agent turned award winning author of Christian fiction. It wasn't that long ago that I wrote my first novel on a bucket list whim, setting the course for a spiritual journey that transformed my life.

But the journey through self publishing hasn't been easy as I soon found myself obsessing over book sales rankings and getting to the top of the shelves, all the while trying to stay rooted in Christ and live out my purpose.

But God has graciously been teaching me how to navigate the spiritual pitfalls of the Bristol book publishing industry, and now I'm sharing them with you. Welcome to the Anointed Scribe Podcast where each week I open my personal diary to share soul nourishing stories designed to inspire, uplift and equip you through your writing life.

If you're already a Christian author or one in the making trying to balance faith with business, you're in the right place. Because for such a time as this, you have been called to thrive as God's Anointed Scribe.

Are you ready? Let's get started.

Hey, it's your author friend Urcelia, and I can't wait to get started into today's topic because I just know it will grow and stretch you into being the writer God intended you to be.

So if you're a regular subscriber, thank you for hanging out with me again today. And if this is your first time here, let me officially welcome you to the Anointed Scribe Tribe.

I hope this episode and show will give you lots of insight into not only God's heart, but also your personal writing journey and that you'll find the courage, wisdom and purpose you need to keep moving forward in your writing as a bonus I'd like to invite you to check out the show and episode descriptions where you'll find a link to my resource library, then click on it.

Pop your email address in then, and look out for the email I'll send you that will give you exclusive access to my entire private folder that's crammed with all sorts of writing templates, printable PDFs, and tools to help you with your daily writing tasks.

Okay, so let's get stuck into this episode, which is all about rejection and getting negative feedback and in particular, how how to handle them so you don't end up discouraged and full of hurt and anger, right?

Because trust me, that will have a negative impact on and in your writing if you let it.

So why is it that rejection feels so deeply personal?

Why does it sting so much when someone doesn't enjoy our books or leaves a harsh review or a publisher tells you your book won't ever sell?

Because, let's face it, it hits us right in the heart, right?

As I pondered and prayed about these questions, I came up with this answer.

I think it's because writing is such a deeply personal thing. Full stop.

It literally spills directly from our heart, especially if you write according to the ways I've been teaching you throughout this podcast.

It's our very spirit as Christian writers that comes to life.

We also pour so much of ourselves into our stories, our ideas, emotions, personal experiences, and yes, even our faith.

So when someone criticizes what we've written, it's hard not to feel like they're criticizing us.

And if that particular book was harder to write than one of your other books, because that does happen. Some books are just harder to write, then it stings even more.

Writing exposes our hearts, makes us vulnerable to judgment, even taunts us into retaliation.

It has a knack of bringing all those ugly feelings to the surface. Anger, resentment, revenge, unworthiness, insecurity, you name it.

It's like kryptonite with a power to strip us from our purpose, our confidence, our identity.

But here's the thing. It doesn't have to be as Christian writers, we get to separate our work from our worth.

Our very identity is in Christ and not in the world.

It's the very thing that sets us apart and protects us from rejection and disappointment.

Because we are in Christ and Christ is in us. And in our writing, we can walk in confidence that bad reviews and negative opinions cannot define us or derail our purpose.

It's only someone's opinion based on their experiences, preferences, and personal likes.

I mean, haven't you ever read a book that didn't quite resonate with you?

Maybe the plot didn't grab you, or the pacing felt off, or the ending fell flat? Did you think the author was terrible and that that author should never write again?

Probably not. Unless, of course, the book was in direct contradiction to your Christian values.

But you'd likely just thought this one wasn't for me and then you moved on, right?

The same is true for your readers. Not every book will connect with every person, and that's okay.

Criticism or low sales aren't personal attacks. They opportunities for growth and as I recently learned, an opportunity to know my readers on a whole other level.

I'll tell you a quick story so you can better understand the context of what I've just said.

One of my recent books, Caleb's Cross, was about a young woman who was a victim of sexual abuse, and it was actually based on a true crime that happened in an Amish community.

Now, even though it's a mystery thriller, there weren't any graphic descriptions or anything of the sort.

I was very careful not to be too explicit, and I did of course, have a strong faith message tied into it. But as careful and sensitive as I was in the writing of this book, I still had one or two readers who rejected it.

In fact, one of my early review team members even emailed me and told me how it repulsed her and that she won't be leaving a review.

Now, I could have crawled into a corner and taken offence, but I didn't. Because when viewed from a reader's point of view who was a victim of abuse as a teen, the story would most definitely open up old wounds.

Experiences that, of course, I would have never known unless she told me. Which she did.

She had the courage to share her thoughts about the book.

And you want to know what I learned from this rejection? I learned that I needed to be more sensitive to my readers, and that I should include a disclaimer in my book's description to inform readers that the book might be triggering for those sensitive to sexual abuse.

And here's the thing. Not only did that reader come back to read the next book in the series, it also gave me the opportunity to pray for her.

And as Christian writers, we need to remember that our identity isn't found in reviews or sales numbers, it's found in Christ alone. And when we make it less about us and more about God and our readers and their needs and wants and desires, we begin to see rejection not as a setback, but as an opportunity for refinement, growth, service, and aligning more closely with his purpose for us and our ministry.

So how do we turn rejection into something good?

It starts with changing how we see it.

What if rejection isn't a roadblock, but a stepping stone?

What if it's God's way of helping us refine our craft and grow as writers?

What if it's a way we can discover how to better serve our readers?

I'll give you another example from my own journey.

The first book I ever wrote was.

Well, let's just say it wasn't great and it will never again see the light of day.

Now, I didn't write it thinking it would be an instant success. It was literally just a naive experiment, dipping my toes in the water, not knowing at the time what I was doing at all.

But I did put it on Amazon and spoiler alert, it flopped. Of course it did.

Actually, I now know it never stood a chance of gaining any traction whatsoever. But that's not the point of the story.

I learned a valuable lesson from it. You see, one of my best friends, who, out of the kindness of her heart, wanted to support me and she told me it was the worst book she'd ever read and that she couldn't give me a review.

Can you imagine hearing that from someone you love and trust? It hurt deeply at the time, I'll be honest. And now we laugh about it. Because, you see, she actually did me a massive favour.

Her rejection was, in fact, a gift.

Because what it did was it pushed me to learn everything I could about writing and publishing. I took courses, joined critique groups and practiced my craft.

Was my next book perfect? No, of course not. But it was better.

And with every next book, I'm getting closer to the writer God called me to be.

Proverbs 18:15 says, wise men and women are always learning, always listening for fresh insights.

That's what rejection does. It keeps us humble, keeps us learning, and pushes us to do our best for God and for the readers we serve.

And here's something else I need to remind you of. Today, even the most successful authors face criticism, and most often in the public eye.

Rejection and criticism aren't unique to us. They're part of every writer's journey, even the most successful Christian authors.

Take Jerry B. Jenkins, co author of the Left behind series.

He has shared that even after massive success, he still receives negative feedback. His advice?

Focus on the readers you are called to reach.

You are not writing to please everyone. You are writing for those God has prepared to receive your message.

So the Next time you receive a critical review or face rejection, remind yourself that you are in good company.

Every author has been there. And remember, no book resonates with everyone.

Your job isn't to avoid avoid rejection. It's to keep writing, keep growing, and to trust God with the results and timing.

See, rejection is God's redirection.

Sometimes rejection is more than feedback.

It's God's way of redirecting us, sometimes even protecting us.

Maybe that publisher who turned you down wasn't the right fit.

Maybe God is leading you towards self publishing or a new genre, or even a deeper message in your writing.

I think about Joseph. In the Bible, his life was one rejection after another.

His brothers sold him into slavery.

He was falsely accused and thrown into prison.

But every single no in Joseph's life was part of God's plan to prepare him for the greater yes.

Rejection in your writing journey might feel like a dead end at the time, but it's often a detour to something better.

Trust that God sees the bigger picture even when you can't.

Let's not sugarcoat it. Rejection hurts. That's a fact. And sometimes it hurts more than it should because it touches an old wound.

Maybe you've faced rejection in other areas of your life by a parent, a teacher, or a friend.

And now every new no feels like confirmation of that past pain it's triggering.

But here's the beautiful thing about God and how he works. He doesn't waste anything. No trauma, no hurt, no past experience.

He uses it for his good and his glory.

Psalm 34:18 says, the Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

Every time we face rejection, it's an opportunity to bring our pain to him and to let him heal us. And if you don't know what it is that's triggering that pain in the first place, pray about it.

Seek God. Ask him to show you. Where does the pain come from? What is it? What is causing that hurt and that pain? What is that rejection about?

Rejection isn't just about your writing. It's about your heart. It's about your growth. It's about your transformation.

There can be healing through rejection, too. And when you let God into those moments, he can turn rejection into restoration.

And here's the practical side of rejection.

Use it as a reason to get better.

If a bad review points out a weakness in your story, don't ignore it. Learn from it.

If low sales show you you need better marketing, take the time to figure it out. Take a course on ads. Learn Think of it like training for a marathon. You wouldn't just show up on a race day without preparation, would you?

You'd train, invest in good shoes, and maybe even hire a coach.

Writing is no different.

Seek feedback, take a class, or join a critique group.

Strive to do your best not out of fear of rejection, but as an act of excellence for God and your readers.

Rejection can be a powerful motivation to improve and be the best you can be for God and your readers.

So here's what I want you to take away from today.

Rejection is not the end of your story.

It's a tool God uses to refine you, to grow you, and to move you closer to the dream he's placed in your heart.

So when rejection comes, and it will, don't let it stop you.

Don't throw a pity party and make it all about you. Use it. Learn from it. Let it push you to become the writer God has called you to be.

Rejection does not define your calling. God does.

Write that down and stick it on your faith wall.

Because Galatians 6:9 says, Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

That harvest is coming, friend. So don't ever shrink back or give up, okay?

I hope and pray this episode spoke to your heart today and that you are encouraged to stay the course.

Thank you for spending this time with me again today. I'd love to hear from you, so reach out to me on social media or send me a direct text with this message link in my show description and let's keep this conversation going.

Also, if you're facing a particular struggle at the moment and you want me to create an episode on a specific topic but don't want to necessarily divulge your name, just head on over to the Facebook page and drop an anonymous comment on one of the posts.

That way your details will remain private and I'll see it the post that is your comment. The Facebook page link is in the show notes, so go and have a look at that.

And as always, stay rooted, Keep writing and trust the one who called you to this incredible journey because for such a time as this, you have been called to thrive as God's Anointed scribe.

See you next time.

Thanks for listening to today's episode of the Anointed Scribe Podcast. I hope you're leaving feeling inspired, encouraged, and on fire to step boldly into your calling as a writer chosen and set apart to fulfill a unique purpose in God's plan.

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