Streetlight Angels Podcast
Creating safety awareness and mindfulness to the nation to help our children take back the ability to play outside "until the street lights come on".
Streetlight Angels Podcast
Building a Village: How One Family Transforms Grief into Action
Mel shares her journey of turning grief into action after losing her 13-year-old daughter Peyton to suicide following bullying at school. She discusses how she's using theater and community advocacy to keep her daughter's memory alive.
• Mel introduces herself as a property manager and theater director from North Carolina, now living in Florida with military family background
• She's directing "Lend Me a Tenor" with StageCrafters theater company, dedicating the production to her daughter Peyton
• Peyton took her life in December 2023, leaving notes that she had been bullied
• The show will feature a seat with Peyton's photo each night, with the second weekend of performances coinciding with what would have been her 14th birthday
• Mel is establishing the Peyton Emily Foundation and a Facebook group called "Moms Rising Up in Okaloosa County"
• The foundation will offer scholarships and work on bullying prevention with the hashtag #PaytonStrong
• Mel discusses the challenges military families face, questioning the expectation that military children should be "resilient"
• She emphasizes the importance of continuing conversations with children, as even when parents think their kids are telling the truth, they may not be
• The hosts offer support for fundraisers and awareness events to help keep Peyton's memory alive
Come see "Lend Me a Tenor" by StageCrafters at the Fort Walton Beach Civic Auditorium. Opening night is June 6th at 7:30 pm, running Friday, Saturday, and Sunday the first weekend, then June 13-15 for the second weekend. Sunday matinees are at 2:00 pm. Visit stagecrafters.com or their Facebook page for more information.
Thank you, welcome to Streetlight Angels podcast. I'm your host, josh Yurkowski. I have my co-host here with me, eugene. What's?
Speaker 2:up y'all.
Speaker 1:Today we've got a wonderful guest with us. Her name is Mel Right Mel. Welcome Mel to Streetlight with us. Her name is Mel Right Mel. Welcome Mel to Streetlight Angel Podcast. Thanks for having me. Let's go ahead and talk a little bit about Mel and where she's from and what she's about and why she's here, and then we'll roll into a little bit of promotional pieces for Mel and talk about what kind of amazing adventures she's got coming for us and to us and to the village that we live in here. But, mel, go ahead. Where are you from, mel?
Speaker 3:I'm from Morganton, North Carolina.
Speaker 1:Okay.
Speaker 3:So we have been down in Florida. We are a military family. We came down when they brought Seventh Group down in 2011.
Speaker 1:You're good.
Speaker 3:And then we spent some time in Yuma, arizona, and then we've been back to the area since 2019. Okay, so we are here.
Speaker 1:Okay, cool, cool. So Arizona veteran, your husband is a veteran, Is he still? He just retired recently you said he did.
Speaker 3:He retired about a year and a half ago from 7th Group.
Speaker 1:Okay, all right, lots of 7th Group around here. Oh Okay, all right, lots of seventh group around here. Oh yeah, I've met a few of their instructors as well. They're some pretty cool people. Yeah man, lots of awesome guys. You know, I mean, honestly, if you got seventh group out here, you'd be under the impression that we would have some major protection to some extent. You know what I mean. Like when it comes to if we could just bring all of that together, I think that'd be a huge village building thing. Oh yeah, like some really good dudes out there, and ladies obviously.
Speaker 2:I like them to be in my Boy Scout troop. The type of confidence you'll get from that, that's right. I don't just do this, I live it. Yeah, oh man that's awesome.
Speaker 3:I can't imagine being married to one, though 20 years jumping on airplanes and he's scared of heights.
Speaker 1:Oh my gosh, Really that's crazy.
Speaker 2:I have a friend in West Point that's a jump instructor. Oh really, he loves doing the football games. I'm like he's a different black dude. You don't imagine black dudes just jumping out of planes over and over again three, four times a day for fun or a paycheck. It's like you can't pay me enough, I mean.
Speaker 1:Well. So I mean, obviously people have the ability to you know kind of change or pivot from this typical standard.
Speaker 2:I'm sure or the stereotype.
Speaker 1:Stereotype, the stereotype, that's what I meant to say, not standard, that's good. Black men say not standard stereotype.
Speaker 2:Right, that's good, black man can jump. But I didn't think out of plane. You know what I mean Usually going that way. Right, jump up, not down.
Speaker 1:Right on, okay, so, mel, so how long have you been here in Florida?
Speaker 3:We came back in 2019.
Speaker 1:19. Okay.
Speaker 3:So, yep, and we actually are all over the panhandle. So on the side, I'm a property manager and I manage from Pensacola to Panama City.
Speaker 2:Oh, wow, okay, so you put some miles in huh.
Speaker 1:Emerald Coast Pretty much. Yeah, you like doing that.
Speaker 3:I do very much, so Our offices are right over on Main Street. So, we've got a pretty good team. Okay, cool and from 2019, you've been here in Crestview, yeah, well in 2011 to 2015 sure came back. Okay, do you like? Crestview? It's growing on me, it's growing on you, it's growing on me. All the work downtown has actually been really nice to see even the food truck festivals they've had downtown, the community that they're trying to start for sure has been a really a nice change of pace, because seventh group wasn't that welcomed when we came down got you, got you, yeah.
Speaker 1:Well, yeah, I mean, I could see that and I'm a veteran, I'm active duty. We came from Japan here three years ago.
Speaker 1:I've never been to Crestview until then, I lived in Pensacola for a little while, lived a few other places, but it is, it's just like you, it's growing on me and I think it's adaptable. It's got a lot of potential for us to be able to kind of break old mold and then put a new mold into it. Right of break old mold and then put a new mold into it, right. And I think I think you have a very good synergy when it comes to, you know, meeting those same requirements. But what else do you have going on?
Speaker 3:We have a lot going on, so our, our families, the theater family. So we are in the middle of Lend Me a Tenor so it's a farce and it's a lot of slapstick comedy. Of Lend Me a Tenor so it's a farce and it's a lot of slapstick comedy. So In One Door, Out One Door, Mistaken Identity absolutely hilarious show. It's going to be at the Fort Walton Beach Civic Auditorium.
Speaker 1:What day is that?
Speaker 3:We open on the 6th of June.
Speaker 1:Okay. And so we run for.
Speaker 3:Friday, saturday and Sunday, and then we open again for our second set of shows on the 13th through the 15th again for our second set of shows on the 13th to the 15th. Okay, so really excited. You can check out the Stage Crafters Facebook page. But we moved into the theater this weekend and we're starting tech.
Speaker 2:Okay, that's awesome.
Speaker 3:Yeah.
Speaker 2:I wish I was so many people that act a fool in my family. I wish we were a theater family. We'd be the next like way in. Yeah, you could still do it. Oh yeah, like weighing. Yeah, you could still do it. Oh yeah, with just my side of the family, yeah, just your, your, but your kids never find you funny.
Speaker 1:That's true. That's true.
Speaker 2:Um he has 10 kids um, yeah, so when we say it takes a village, it actually does take a village.
Speaker 1:Sometimes you have to raise your own village yeah, I'm about to say he created his own village and now he's just going to go ahead and implement that into ours as well. But what are you at? So? No, but you only have how many more in the house I have only three in the house.
Speaker 2:Yeah, three, everybody else is like adults hanging out at college campuses and stuff. Yeah.
Speaker 3:Our oldest is at Northwest Florida, so definitely different.
Speaker 1:Is it? Yeah, for sure. So living the life of a what did you say?
Speaker 3:a film family, a theater family Is that what it is? Theater family Is that?
Speaker 1:hard.
Speaker 3:No, it's actually fun. I mean, it is stressful and you get very tired, but you get to drop who you are and what's going on outside. And you get to step on that stage and tell somebody else's story, whether it's a drama, a dramedy or a straight comedy or a musical. Get up there, make a fool of yourself. You know, and people pay to see that that's so fun so, but it's just the community that it takes from.
Speaker 3:It's all volunteer for stage crafters, so we don't get paid, you get there, you build this, you do everything. And this show is special, um, because we are actually dedicating it to um my middle child, payton emily payton, emily, okay and um, this, this show called what?
Speaker 1:The one that you're about to do?
Speaker 3:Lend Me a. Tenor Lend Me a.
Speaker 1:Tenor, not a musical, lend Me a Tenor, and it's dedicated to Peyton, your middle child. It sure is that's right? And so how did you come up with this, you know, really, foundation as to dedicate it to Peyton. What is the purpose?
Speaker 3:So this is my directorial debut with StageCrafters.
Speaker 1:Sure.
Speaker 3:And so the first time I've directed here. Yeah, and I was in it in Yuma when all my children saw me, they probably shouldn't have Quick little aside. You may not want to bring little ones to the show.
Speaker 1:Yeah, some of the comedy is a little older audiences.
Speaker 3:But Peyton put in about 400 hours with the community theater over the past two and a half years working backstage working the spotlight. Always had a headset on. She'd be running around with the drill you know you've seen adult want to help and Kevin Clements, who primarily builds the sets, wears Peyton. So she's become a staple around there. But we lost her on December 2nd.
Speaker 1:I'm sorry.
Speaker 3:So we are dedicating this show to her. Okay, she was vice president of the STEM Academy and we were away. My husband and I were celebrating our 20-year anniversary on a cruise ship and got word that she had taken her life and that she had left notes that she was being bullied.
Speaker 1:Wow, that's unfortunate.
Speaker 1:Yeah, I'm sorry I hear that we were talking earlier. Him and I actually just did an episode, and we have a few episodes we're going to be pushing, and it's going to be very, very specific to the bullying. That's difficult, because this is that village building that we're constantly talking about, or that the, the, the mind blowing effect that a child could think or do something as significant as that based on, you know, an outside entity bothering them to that point. You know what I mean and so you know. What kind of proactivity are we doing to prevent that? What kind of preemptive prevention are we doing? And I think that this is, you know, you dedicating to this is going to shed amazing light on that, if I'm not mistaken right.
Speaker 3:Yeah, we are we actually. I don't want to divulge too much now but, she's going to have a seat every night, front row with her photo, and so she can see it. And coincidentally, the second show night run would have been her 14th birthday, the 13th of June. So special plug anybody who is listening to this, who knows her, who had the pleasure of having her in their life, come on out for that night.
Speaker 3:It's going to be a great show that night every night, but it really is, because by all accounts there were no signs. I actually had a local school teacher reach out and say if your daughter, who was kind, pretty intelligent by all accounts, had a great circle of friends, could do this, then every parent should be scared.
Speaker 1:Yeah, oh my gosh, yeah, you don't think about that.
Speaker 2:Yeah, man, just just kind of almost wanting to bring, I got 10 girls. I mean, not 10 girls, I can't even talk right.
Speaker 2:I'm giving myself more kids than people usually give me but having five girls, and you know even my tough ones, you know, I think you know that they got it together. You know, and always try to, you know, instill ideas that they could talk to me about anything you know, talk to me about anything you know and you know. So I would like to know from you, like you know, things I, you know, I could be aware of or try to instill because I'm still raising. You know, my youngest is three, my oldest is 32, but my youngest turns three tomorrow, so, wow, so yeah, I'm open ears and heart for you, for sure.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely. Rules are written in blood. Have you ever heard that before? Or policies are written in blood. It's because it's almost like something that has to happen for someone to react and then actually get something done. And unfortunately, this has happened so many. This has already happened so many times and it's continuing to happen. It just everybody turns a blind eye to it constantly. But by you doing what you're doing, you take mad, mad credit to be able to do that like I am just humbled sitting next to you, to be able to, for you, to see you as strong as you are, maintain some of your composure, and your composure while you're, you know, on this podcast with us talking openly about what you're doing and what you're dedicating this to is, to me, is just, it's a beautiful thing, it needs to happen, but it's, like I said, mad respect for that and I think you're wow, you are powerful.
Speaker 2:You remind me of, like the moms when I was in the early 90s. You know they always had the Mothers Against Drunk Driving speak to the high school kids right before prom, and I almost remember it every word, because it was so true for her and me experiencing it through her that you just telling your story is going to impact whoever hears it, because I can remember that and that was as close to 30 years ago, you know and so that it still plays in my head and I've never drank alcohol or had a cigarette or anything just because it's like it can not just affect me, but you know, my family and the people around me that that I've, you know, influenced throughout the years.
Speaker 3:Yeah, thank you guys for that. And, if I may, there's one word that I've come to actually hate, and so is the word strong, because we didn't ask for this, we didn't ask to walk down this path.
Speaker 1:Sure.
Speaker 3:But somebody has to be her voice, because if we're quiet it's like she didn't exist.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:And that's not going to happen.
Speaker 1:Right.
Speaker 3:She touched so many lives. She's going to continue to touch lives as we go down this road. And what I'm learning is it is such a big, it's nationwide, but in Okaloosa County especially Bullying and how do you define bullying? And with social media and all these different facets these kids get into, there really isn't any clear defined resources. You said you'd like to hear me speak. Well, that's what we're still trying to figure out.
Speaker 3:You know where do they go. And then you have that the second side of being a military child, using the word resilient, and we shouldn't be expecting our kids and wearing that as a badge of honor.
Speaker 1:You're right.
Speaker 3:So there's so many different things that are going on, and so Peyton's legacy is far from over. And so even doing the show and being at the theater. It's hard Every day. The past two and a half years my little girl was there helping me learn lines or anywhere you pay in like help, sure, sure um, but it gives me a piece of her right, yeah, it's, it's sustained, it's.
Speaker 1:It's sustained like a necessity and um, you know, I, I was told recently, not too long ago, by a mentor of mine says you did you die twice in life. One, um you know, on your the death that you're actually being put into the ground, and then the second one, when your name is the last time someone says your name and the goal, um, and I will help you achieve this all day long, and and and eugene will too. Streetlight angels will and and and. The goal would be to never allow, you know, peyton to pass for the second time, and so that that's. You know, this podcast is, is is not very large right now when it comes to viewers, but the, but what you're doing is is is going to impact so many people and this film that you're doing is going to impact so many people and it's going to keep that longevity that we need, um, you know, for the awareness, um to build our village. You know what I mean.
Speaker 1:Uh, ultimately, and I think, like I said, uh, I think it's, it's a, it's a wonderful and beautiful thing um to to uh, that what you're doing, um, but it's a very I can only imagine how difficult um, it is I'm, I'm, I'm, I'm like my words are messed up. Yeah, I don't. I don't get like this very often. Gene, do not edit. Yeah, no, no, no, no, so so no more apologies anymore.
Speaker 3:Yeah if we one day sitting there laughing, having a good time, and then you just see something that reminds you.
Speaker 1:Sure, I mean, it's only been five months, right Still?
Speaker 3:looking for answers, still trying to, you know, talk with everybody and work through everything. So and basically I guess I kind of do need to respond to you. What I would say right now is just to continue those conversations.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:And every time you think that your kid is telling you the truth, they might not be. So, we have to look at our expectations on our kids and Peyton was an old soul so we kind of treated her beyond her years. But at the end of the day she was just a kid. A kid who loved to go outside. Speaking to what your organization does and play and get dirty and she wasn't really on social media.
Speaker 3:She was out there in the woods making videos, actually for the STEM Academy, so that's what she loved to do.
Speaker 1:Yeah, and that's so, man. And then that you know full circle back into Streetlight Angels podcast. You know, going outside and playing until the streetlights come on, that's what we want our kids to do, and you're saying that we lost a child that loved to do that, and that is such a rare thing to hear that someone was actually doing that. You know what I mean. And so to allow or to make it to where that we have the ability to now speak to Peyton's name here, you know what I mean, and that never let that name go is now a goal. That wasn't a goal before you stepped into this room. For me personally, you know what I mean, and so I think that a lot of things are meant to be brought together, and the fact that you're doing what you're doing is something that we can expound on.
Speaker 1:It's something that we can push heavily and what we're going to continue we've always talked about it, but we never, really, never really hit us as hard as it is right right, you know what I mean.
Speaker 2:I mean because you know the thing is is like when you experience it personally, like you sitting here and telling your story is like, and I you know, and the genuine love that you have for this whole village that we have to say, okay, this is not only going to help me heal, it's going to help heal those silent whispers that we don't happen to hear. And there's a lot of children out there preteens and up that, even college students that that need a voice that will hear that story and be like that's me, that everything that that she's talking about is me, yeah for sure, what?
Speaker 1:what do you need from us? What do you need? What do you need from us, like, what's next, like do you want? Just, you know, obviously we're promoting the theater and promoting what you're doing as a theater family. You know, keep doing what you're doing and no doubt I think beautiful things that you're doing already and then can be consistent on is not difficult. But as far as Streetlight Angels podcast, you know our goal is to not we walk the walk, we don't just talk the talk. So you know what do you need from us and you know it's, it's asks are not a problem. You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:No, thank you for that, and I think some of that I'll know more over time as we continue to grieve and we continue to heal and and really get more into the community, but just to keep talking to keep being loud.
Speaker 3:I do believe in strength in numbers and it shouldn't have to be real for it to matter. But unfortunately that's what you said earlier, that's what happens. So I think, definitely just more conversations and keeping that door open and finding resources. And how do you help the family that's left behind? I've got an 18-year-old, her freshman year in college, and I've got a little 12-year-old who's in middle school.
Speaker 2:Now do you have social media set up to keep us informed as well?
Speaker 3:We do. We are working on the Peyton Emily Foundation and so we're going to be working on the 501c3. We do have a Facebook group right now for moms. I have been asked that some dads can join. We're going to expand, but it's Moms Rising Up in Okaloosa County. We're going to try to do a meetup after the end of the summer and so we're just starting again with those conversations. Is bringing people together to share what they've been through so that we know what resources are needed. You don't know what you don't know. Once you recognize a problem, well then you have to discover well, how do you prevent that?
Speaker 2:What is truly going on.
Speaker 3:But there is not a facebook page dedicated to her yet. The website should be launched soon, so I will definitely keep you guys in, but our hashtag is payton strong okay so, um, down to some wonderful friends that we have made connections with that actually in the theater world, helping take a stand as well for pain wow, and if you, uh, if you want to do any type of a fundraiser that includes stand up comedy, give me a call.
Speaker 2:Oh, you're already there, yeah, and anything you got going on. I'm pretty sure I got some comedy brothers and sisters that will most definitely step up as well. So, eugene, he.
Speaker 1:He also has done like comedy stand up for children in schools, because you know you bring out laughter. Laughter is going to help significantly to everybody. So you've done actual.
Speaker 2:So we've presented that same presentation with those five questions in elementary school, middle school and high schools and, like the whole state of Wyoming wanted that presentation because at one during COVID, they had the highest suicide rate amongst adolescents and and so it was important for them to try to figure out. So they were able to work it, you know, to bring four comics in and talk about how we use humor as a coping mechanism to talk about anything, and this is how we would answer those five questions for ourselves. But yeah, I think it's important because kids, you'd be surprised, will come up to you and you know like one comic would have had a bullying issue. Like me, I was a teen parent and so when an eighth grader sees that this person in his 40s had a kid in the eighth grade, you know they kind of like whoa, but you know everybody's story hits differently with those groups. No-transcript. I could be like I want that kid to hang out with my kids, you know like I like neat kids. You know what I mean.
Speaker 3:I could be like I want that kid to hang out with my kids, you know, and I mean I feel like she could be one of our streetlight angels watching out for the you know village abode with with that strong name now you're gonna get me choked up yeah there is a thing in the theater called a ghost light, and when you lose somebody that you love you light, a single light, and it shines out over the stage oh, wow over everybody and in the empty auditorium oh my gosh you kind of go silent, but they're always there so it's actually one of the designs that we have for payton wow, we're working on with the shirts and the payton strong and our end goal is to have some scholarships for children.
Speaker 3:So we're going to be reaching out to some community members and seeing what we can get set up and how we can contribute once we're fully up and operational. For sure To carry that on, because it's not just about the preventive measures, it's about extending that beyond that Right, right. And so laughter is the best medicine, when you can laugh with somebody.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah.
Speaker 3:You can talk about the hard things.
Speaker 2:Yeah, somebody you can talk about the hard things.
Speaker 3:Yeah, yeah, and people ask well, why are you doing Let Me Attend or that sort of kid-friendly show? Because my daughter wasn't like most kids.
Speaker 1:Yeah.
Speaker 3:And you laugh from the minute those people step on that stage to the minute they get off.
Speaker 1:Wow.
Speaker 2:That is unbelievable. My first Broadway play was I think Everything Goes Wrong. Are you familiar with that.
Speaker 3:The Play that Goes Wrong. The Play that Goes Wrong. Are you familiar with that? The play that goes wrong. The play that goes wrong. It is PLT just did that in Pensacola.
Speaker 2:Really, yeah, I wanted to go to that one just because it brings back memories of that first play, and I think that's what made me think, okay, I can be a dude and still go to plays, because you know you're thinking it's always going to be singing or it's going to be some cats involved or somebody on a broom. Well, you know, stuff gets broken people, you know. I mean, it's just that one was a great introductory for any guy who think they're too tough for plays. And then you'll go see chicago because you're like man the athleticism oh yeah you know, involved in plays is just awesome.
Speaker 2:I can just imagine, you know, if she was doing that play either, being the engineer up there you know, supposedly directed everything but not.
Speaker 3:Her favorite show is actually Hadestown, which she got to see last year. But you never know how strong you are till you're a big old man up there in tights and then you're lifting some beautiful woman and you're out there doing your thing so yeah, awesome.
Speaker 1:So give us another shout out to what's going on at the time. You know, let the listeners know. We need to solidify that, because a lot of times, man, I got to rewind now Because now I need to know exactly when this is and where it's at, and you know. So give us a nice little shout out to where you're going and what you're doing.
Speaker 3:You got it? Yeah Well, come on out to see Lend Me a Tenor by StageCrafters at the Fort Walton Beach Civic Auditorium. Opening night is going to be June the 6th at 7.30 pm. It's going to run Friday, saturday and Sunday. Sunday matinees are at 2 o'clock and it's also going to run the 13th through the 15th. So you can go to stagecrafterscom or you can go to their Facebook page.
Speaker 1:Wow, Awesome, Awesome. And that was. That's a mouthful dude. I can barely get an exit out.
Speaker 2:Oh yeah. Well, I will say this is that I've been up all night and I was going to skip this interview, but it has blessed my heart and so I am glad I made it here, even though I was running a few minutes behind, and this is going to be very, very mind blowing and moving for our listeners. Thank you.
Speaker 1:Yeah, yes, and Mel, like I said, it was absolute pleasure to have you on here and I really really, oh my gosh, I'm so happy that Debbie introduced us you know what I mean and then had you on here and not, you know, not only to help, you know, promote what you got going on, but then to now build a relationship with you is a necessity, I think, and something, and I want to work in conjunction with everything that you've got going on. And then I want Streetlight Angels to help Peyton continue her name throughout the end of all time. You know what I mean that kind of thing. But again, it's a pleasure to have you on here, Mel, we're going to have you on here again. I'm sure we need to keep.
Speaker 1:We walk the walk. Like I said, we don't just talk and run our mouths, we walk the walk. So we want to know what's going on. We want to keep this updated. When you get your website on there, let us know. We'll put it on to our platforms. You know what I mean. When you get, when you have new things coming. If you have any issues or you're coming into any blocks or any you know problems, let streetlight angels come and help you, you know, tackle those and we'll do it. We've done already some really cool stuff in the village already, so let us help you. Knowing that I know, knowing that if anything would be needed from us, it would be reciprocated just because of you know how I can already tell that the type of human you are and the core values you have.
Speaker 1:So again, thank you so much for being here, mel, and thank you for opening up to us. It's very hard to be vulnerable, you know to, especially to new people you just met, but but it's appreciated, it's needed, it's a necessity for you to open up, like you have been so if I may.
Speaker 3:This might be unprecedented, but there's something I like to say that I think is very fitting here. You talked about an exit sure you know me actresses always have to have a spotlight yes, I love it but there's something that I've said since I was young and it's actually a part for there and all the other lives wow, it's beautiful.
Speaker 1:Well, can't beat that. This is Streetlight Angels podcast. Check us out. Like I say, we love you. We love you, be safe y'all. Peace, peace, peace. That's right Bye.