A Spirited Christmas

Candy Cane Cocktails in hand, we dive into two very different holiday romances and come up for air with laughter, side-eye and a few hard truths. First up: Good Spirits by B.K. Borison, a contemporary paranormal charmer where a Ghost of Christmas Past lands in a modern woman’s living room and promptly breaks every rule — starting with her heart. We dig into the banter that actually crackles, the clever sensory limits on ghosts (Hot Tamales, anyone?), and the soft-boy off-season where knitting and stray cats reign. Then we pick at the seams:  why does a world with cosmic HR underuse its best haunter and what happens when a century-old ghost gets a mortal body with zero paperwork? The snow-globe spice scene delights but the ending raises questions the book doesn’t answer.

Next:  a small-town second-chance romance set in Door County that trades genuine intimacy for tourist brochure vibes. Lila returns home with writer’s block, Conrad is mid-proposal arc with his long-term girlfriend, and the story asks us to cheer for kisses before clean breakups. We talk through the stiff dialogue, relentless name-dropping and the deeper issue:  how ambition and choosing to be childfree get framed as moral failings, while cooking and caretaking are used as a wife test. It’s a clash between nostalgia and agency, and it makes the so-called happily ever after feel smaller than it should.

We close with clear takeaways:  apologies mean you want to try again and cheating isn’t romantic. If you crave holiday romance with heart, look for stories that balance cozy settings with consent, accountability and characters who get to be whole. Hit play for ghostly giggles, spicy snow and frank talk about what makes a winter love story actually warm. If this resonated, subscribe, share with a romance-loving friend, and leave a review. What’s your holiday romance green flag or dealbreaker?

Books for the Episode:

Good Spirits by B.K. Borison

A Christmas Kind of Perfect by Christine Schimpf

Cocktail for the Episode:

Candy Cane Cocktail

Transcript

Nicole:

Well, happy holidays. I'm Nicole Danielle. 

Meghan:

And I'm Meghan Leigh. And this is Romance on the Rocks, where two bookish biddies read romance novels and once in a while are able to get together in the same room to talk about them. Yeah. 

Meghan:

Yeah. 

Nicole:

And drink. 

Meghan:

Yeah. 

Nicole:

Yeah. 

Meghan:

And imbibe. It's feast. 

Nicole:

Yeah.  Feast.

Meghan:

Yes. Okay. Feast. Yeah. 

Nicole:

We're feasting. 

Meghan:

We're feasting. We did charcuterie because uh we had grand plans for feast. And then as it got closer, we realized we didn't have the time or the capacity. So, charcuterie it is. 

Nicole:

Right. And we do have some lovely festive candy cane cocktails. Cheers.

Meghan:

You're about to poke your eye out.

Nicole:
 I can’t even drink it because the candy canes are going into my eye. Okay. Yep, that's like mint mouthwash. 

Meghan:

Oh boy. We're going slow and low. 

Nicole:

This will be a sparing drink. 

Meghan:

Yeah.

Nicole:

Yeah.

Well, on this episode, we are continuing our holiday adventures and fun. And we are covering general holiday Christmassy type stories for this episode. Last episode, we did some Hanukkah adventures and romance. Quite delightful for some of us. For some delightful for others. 

Meghan:

My book was fine. It was just very middle of the road, green pepper. 

Nicole:

Yeah. And I got the lovely habanero. 

Meghan:

Your yours was exactly what you wanted. 

Nicole:

Yes. And I thank you for that. Well, this time around, I have Good Spirits by B.K. Borison. And what do you have for this episode? 

Meghan:

I have A Christmas Kind of Perfect by Christine Schimf.

I think I said “schrimf” when I was uh using it last time, but it's Shimf. 

Nicole:

Shimf.

Meghan:

Yes. 

Nicole:

All right. So, my book, Good Spirits by B.K. Borison. I'm a huge fan of B.K. Borison. I fell in love with her, I believe, what was it, May or this summer? 

Meghan:

Yeah. 

Nicole:

I read Mixed Signals and I was like; this woman has a direct line to my funny bone. 

Meghan:

Yeah, you said it was the most you had laughed out loud in any of the novels. 

Nicole:

Yes. This is a freshie published in 2025. 

Meghan:

Very nice. 

Nicole:

It is a contemporary paranormal holiday romantic company with grumpy sunshine vibes. 

Meghan:

Easy for you to say. 

Nicole:

My hot take. 

Meghan:

No. No. No. No.

Nicole:

You love my hot takes. 

Meghan:

No, because it's never a hot take. I've been thinking about it. I think you should call it “Quickies with Nicole.” 

Nicole:

Oh, I'm writing it down. Quickies with Nicole. 

Meghan:

It's either that or a scintillating synopsis. Um, but I like quickies with Nicole because you give us like your quick rundown. 

Nicole:

Yeah, yeah. 

Meghan:

So, there you go. 

Nicole:

Okay, my quickie with Nicole. A Christmas Carol gets horny with a twist. 

Meghan:

Nice. 

Nicole:

All right. My main characters are Harriet York, age 27. She runs the antique store she inherited from her Aunt Matilda. 

Meghan:

Nice.

Nicole:

She is estranged from her parents and sister, Samantha, because she didn't continue her law career, but she's expected to show up annually at the family Christmas party for appearances. Then we have Nolan Callahan, also late 20s question mark. He has died in Ireland in 1902 and has been a ghost of Christmas past ever since. 

Meghan:

How long have you been 20? 

Nicole:

Right. He has a penchant for hot tamales. Those spicy cinnamon candies. I'll explain why in a little bit. 

Meghan:

Alright. 

Nicole:

Some pre-book notes to keep in mind before we get to the plot. Ghosts per this book have difficulty with full sensory experiences. They can barely taste or feel temperature differences. So, this is why Nolan likes the hot tamale candies because it's one of the few things he can almost taste. 

Meghan:

I get it. Okay. 

Nicole:

Nolan's job as a ghost of Christmas past is to haunt people a couple of times by showing them their past and finding where they went wrong or what mistakes they've made or what made them a quote bad person. Then he passes them on to the ghost of Christmas present, and job is done for the season. 

Meghan:

Nice. 

Nicole:

The plot line. Nolan's assignment for the holiday season is Harriet. But there's a problem. Harriet is now Scrooge. Not even close. And then there are more problems. And that's literally all I can say if you don't want me to spoil the book for you.

Meghan:

What???

Nicole:

But I am going to spoil the book for this podcast. So, stay tuned and I will get there if you're ready. Or if you don't want me to spoil things, skip ahead to the next appropriate chapter. 

Uh I'm going to start right off with spice level. 

Meghan:

Mmmhmm.

Nicole:

Jalapeno.

Meghan:

Okay. So that's usually my level of reference. 

Nicole:

Yeah. So, I often discuss books with my hubby while I'm reading them, and this was no exception. And Bob kept joking that when the ghost finally cum, would it be like ectoplasm? Uh-huh. Well, we were rewarded with the answer on this element. After Harriet gives Nolan an old-fashioned and a BJ. 

Meghan:

All right. 

Nicole:

And ghosts of Christmas pass just snow like a snow globe. 

Meghan:

What? It was snowing in the bedroom. 

Nicole:

Okay. And when I told Bob about this, his response was, and I quote, fabulous, love it, no notes. 

Meghan:

I…my brain immediately went to like what kind of snow it would be. Like, are we talking slushy? Are we talking like light and fluffy mistakes? 

Meghan:

It was a light, fluffy mist that slowly melted on my skin. 

Meghan:

Okay. Personally, I wouldn't want it snowing in my bedroom. 

Nicole:

No, but no. 

Meghan:

This sounds like uh terror for a black light. 

Nicole:

It was it was magical in the book. 

Meghan:

Ugh, okay. 

Nicole:

Uh, it was definitely a slow burn though, Mehgan. And nothing over-titillating or risqué. 

Meghan:

Okay. I mean, it's a Christmas novel. 

Nicole:

Yeah. Things I loved. I love the name Nolan as a main male character name. My first crush in fourth grade was Nolan King. 

Meghan:

Oh, very sweet. 

Nicole:

Our dads were both serving in the military, and he lived around the corner for me in Manana Housing in Pearl City, Hawaii. And me and my other friend used to have bike wars against him and his friend, and we would throw rocks at each other. 

Meghan:

Yeah, like you do. 

Nicole:

Yep. Then both our dads got stationed in Sasebo, Japan, because same boat. And fourth grade hit, and suddenly Noland was my heartthrob. I went from wanting to beat the shit out of him in the neighborhood to wanting to smooch. We even went to the movies together and saw Bambi, and he bought me a chocolate bar. 

Meghan:

Very sweet. 

Nicole:

It was very sweet. 

Meghan:

Have you tried to track him down recently? 

Nicole:

I did just try to stalk on Facebook and I came up with two Nolan Kings. 

Meghan:

Okay. 

Nicole:

One of them looked feasible. The other one also looked feasible. 

Meghan:

Uh-oh. 

Nicole:

And I did message them and I was like, “hey, not to be weird”... 

Meghan:

You're that girl. 

Nicole:

…but did you live in Japan in Hawaii? I got no responses. So, I'm gonna guess those are not the Nolan kings that I knew. 

Meghan:

Or they looked you up and they were like, doing a romance podcast. I want none of that. Hey Nolan, we're here if you would like to… 

Nicole:

Yeah, Nolan King, if you're out there somewhere. You were enjoying a treat when I wasn't trying to be you up. 

Meghan:

There you go. 

Nicole:

So yes, I like the name Nolan, and I greatly appreciated it. The initial meeting and conversation between Nolan and Harriet, hilarious. He appears in her living room on December 1st while she's watching White Christmas, and the conversation that ensues is classic, epic, fabulous. It's exactly the conversation you would expect any normal, intelligent modern woman to have upon discovering the ghost in her house. And it made me giggle a lot. 

Meghan: 

December 1st? 

Nicole:

Yeah, that's when he's allowed to start haunting. 

Meghan:

Oh, okay. I'm like, that's early, man. Not as early as a lot of these stores start their Christmas season, you know? 

Nicole:

Yeah. So basically, the gist of the conversation, she's like, hey, dude, you're breaking in my house, breaking and entering. And he's like, “Well, I'm here to haunt you.” And she's like, “That sounds murdery.” Yeah, it does. And then he's like, “Well, I'm here to save your soul”. And she's like, “still sounds murdery.” 

Meghan:

Thanks, anyway. 

Nicole:

Yeah, it was it was a lot of like back and forth and uh tit for tat, and I really enjoyed it. It was very funny, and I was giggling out loud. Another thing that I enjoyed from the book, uh, PJ sets. Harriet wears several cute Christmas pajama sets, and I'm totally here for it. I'm seriously looking at buying some for myself now because I love the idea of it. 

Meghan:

I love a good PJ set. I don't know if I've ever told you this, but every year for Christmas, for at least like the last, oh gosh, six years, seven years, I have bought all my nieces and nephews Christmas pajamas all matching so that on Christmas Eve they can sleep in their Christmas pajamas, wake up in them, and open their presents. 

Nicole:

Nice. 

Meghan:

Huge fan of the Christmas jammies. 

Nicole:

Nice. 

Meghan:

Yeah. 

Nicole:

So, uh, I love the idea. I'm gonna order some, I think. I'm gonna go for it for the holidays. Quote, “They're buttery, soft, and deliciously comfortable. Matching pajama sets have always been guilty pleasure of mine. Something about the silky, smooth materials and the utter departure from practicality. It feels indulgent when I wear them. Something just for me.”

And this really touches on something we've discussed in previous podcasts with costumes and whatnot.

Meghan:

“With which to please him”. 

Nicole:

But also, I pointed out from “Eat Play Love” that you can wear them for yourself. Yes. Yeah. Love it. Uh, I loved Nolan's off-season ghost activities, and I think you will too, Megan. When he's not haunting people one month out of the year, Nolan likes to take care of stray cats and knit. I love that. Right. That's great. And one of my favorite movies is High Spirits. I don't know if you've ever heard of it. 

Meghan:

I've never seen it. 

Nicole:

No. So it has Daryl Hannah, Liam Neeson, Steve Gutenberg, uh Peter O'Toole. A lot of like pretty big names for back in the 80s. And it involves Irish ghosts. 

Meghan:

Okay. 

Nicole:

So, I feel like it kind of ties in with this book called Good Spirits. And I'm almost wondering, did she maybe get some inspiration from high spirits? I don't know. I was feeling a connection and I loved it. 

Challenges: First, I don't think Nolan is being used effectively as a ghost. Well, probably not. It seems like it's kind of a point though. He literally only haunts, as far as I can tell, one person a year from December 1st to about December 24th, max. But typically, he can usually finish his job at about three nights to two weeks. And I just don't feel like this is an effective resource. I mean, he could probably knock out two or three people per his designated haunting season if he was allowed to start around Thanksgiving and then go until possibly New Year's Eve.

Meghan:

This is this is clearly a case of you taking a person who's good at their job and just giving them more work. Like, don't do that to this guy. Just because he's efficient and he does what he's supposed to do, you know. 

Nicole:

Well, there's a legit HR department that he records to. 

Meghan:

Yeah. Don't tattle on this guy. 

Nicole:

So, I'm like, somebody somewhere is not properly utilizing their workforce. But anyway…

Meghan:

I won't tell. 

Nicole:

Uh second, the slow burn. You know, I really struggle with a slow burn, but it was truly getting to the point where I was like, dude, just put your penis in her already. 

Third, I was challenged by the last few chapters of the book. I love BK Borison. She has a direct line in my funny bone, as I said. Probably my top five romance read this year, and probably top five romance novels of all time that I've read. But I'm gonna be completely honest. I really feel like the characters and storyline controlled the book and that an ending kind of got wedged in. I don't know how else to say it, and I really want to say it as nicely as possible because I enjoyed this story overall, and I really do love B.K. Borson as a writer. She makes me laugh so much. Really appreciate and love it. But I feel like I kept narrowing in on the end of the book and kept turning to my husband, Bob, because we were in the car all day together, driving out to Wisconsin. And I said to him, I don't know how this is gonna wrap up. And then it really was a challenge because there was a final chapter that left me, frankly, with a lot of questions. And then an author's acknowledgement section, and then a nine months later epilogue. And I'm gonna get into it. So, if you don't want the spoilers, please just move to the next chapter of the podcast. But I'm gonna get into it. 

Let's just say, first of all, that ICE would be all over Nolan's ass after he's allowed to become a mortal again at the end. 

Meghan:

So, he doesn't have any documentation, is what your saying.

Nicole:

Yeah, because he's been dead for over a hundred years. Yeah. Right. So, uh there's no way he could work legally without any kind of identification or documentation. So, is he just an undocumented, illegally paid worker at the antique shop? Or is he an undocumented, illegal alien now being forced to perform both sex work and manual labor for no pay? Girl, I don't even know where to start or stop with all that, but it's all I could think about. 

Meghan:

Did they get married?

Nicole:

No. 

Meghan:

Okay. 

Nicole:

So, and I'm sure I'm a horrible person who is killing the magic in all of this, but I was just working so hard to figure it all out because you know how ridiculously invested I get in my characters and our futures. Also, there was this “nine months later” epilogue. Uh, but there wasn't anything that happened in the storyline or for the characters, but it is also a weirdly distinct measurement of time that equates to pregnancy, but then that's not what's happening here. So why nine months? My question. Seriously, why not six months, seven months, ten months, any number of months, but nine? It was just weird. Uh, and again, I really did enjoy the book overall. Uh, Nolan is describing Harriet's eyes, fun quotable. “They look like whiskey in the dark, a glass half filled, a single cube of ice at the bottom.” This is oddly specific, but I was really digging it. 

Meghan:

Yeah. 

Nicole:

Yeah. Uh also, Nolan and Harriet are discussing various a Christmas Carol movies, and Nolan says, “I always preferred the Muppet Christmas Carol version. There's something oddly captivating about Miss Piggy.” Uh, I could not agree more. The Muppet Christmas Carol movie is the best version. Yeah, it's pretty good. The song When Love Is Gone, Chef's Kiss, amazing. Marley and Marley, Chef's Kiss, amazing. And there are so many other amazing songs in that production. And yes, Miss Piggy is, as always, captivating. 

Meghan:

She is. 

Nicole:

And my final thoughts: I think your sister Caitlyn might enjoy this story. She's an American gal married to an Irish guy, and I think this could be a fun read for her. 

Meghan:

Nice. 

Nicole:

Also, any fans of a Christmas Carol would probably enjoy this little rum. Alright, so that was uh Good Spirits for Me by BK Borison. Meghan, you are up next with your mouth full of the lovely charcuteries that you've had. 

Meghan:

I had to take a bite and now I'm gonna do it. Sausage and crackers, a little bit of cheese. Alright, hold on. Palate cleanser. 

Nicole:

Well, it's definitely minty enough to be a palate cleanser. 

Meghan:

This is a dangerous weapon.  One of us is gonna poke her eye out. You'll poke her eye, kid!

Nicole:

You’ll poke your eye out!

Meghan:  Yeah.  Alright, folks. I read A Christmas Kind of Perfect by Christine Schimf. Not Shrimpf. Um, and so I dressed appropriately.

I've got my Door County sweatshirt on. 

Nicole:

Nice, nice. 

Meghan:

Right. Had to get into the vibes here. Oh boy. Christmas Kind of Perfect. 

Nicole:

Show notes. Show notes. 

Meghan:

This one was published in 2017. And fun fact, I moved to Door County in 2018. Anything that's being talked about in this book is stuff I am absolutely familiar with because I was there when this was basically written. Premise. Lila Clark is returning home to Sister Bay, Wisconsin, after years of living in the big city. She's been in New York. She's supposed to be working on one of her newer books. She is an author, but she has been dealing with a lot of writer's block. When her childhood best friend, Melody, asks her to come back and do a book signing to help out her business after fall fest season is over. Lila jumps at the chance because she's hoping she will find some inspiration for her book. And she thinks that getting away from that hustle and bustle, taking a sabbatical from the city is gonna get things like krack-a-lacken, right? 

Nicole:

Kraka-lacken.

Meghan:

You've heard it here. 

Lila's only hesitation, of course, is the man she left behind, Conrad Hamilton. Conrad stayed behind in Sister Bay, starting his own successful construction company. From what I can piece together with the timeline, they must have broken up sometime after college, and Lila's been gone for maybe a decade. So, I'm putting them somewhere around like maybe 32 years old. This is a guess because there are some time issues in this book. I'm not even gonna get into the discussion where I was talking to my husband about it, and I was trying to break down some of the timing, and we were both like, we think the author's confused. 

Anyway, throughout much of the book, there are a lot of hints that Lila feels like she needs forgiveness for the traumatic breakup between herself and Conrad, feeling like she's not worthy of forgiveness because of how much hurt she caused. Almost immediately upon pulling into town, Lila stops at her best friend Melody's business, which is called Window Shopping. I thought that was kind of cute. That's cute. Uh cute and kitschy. Yeah. It is the only fictitious business listed in this entire book. We will get to that later. 

Nicole:

Okay. 

Meghan:

Uh Lila drops into Melody's shop and is shocked to find out that Melody is heavily pregnant with twins. 

Nicole:

Oh, surprise. 

Meghan:

During their initial conversation, we find out that Melody is due with the twins sometime after Christmas. And again, this is fall festival season, so kind of late October, early November. Because of her delicate condition, Melody asks Lila if she would be willing to not only do the book signing, but maybe fill in at the store in the afternoons. That way Melody can get off her feet. Lila accepts because again, she's looking for inspiration and maybe she'll find it shaking things up and trying something new. See if that results in some creativity. Cue the entrance of the long lost sweetie. Melody has hired him to do some construction around the shop. He's been working on building a small ski chalet in the backyard. Yeah. Anyway, the first interaction between Lila and Conrad goes pretty smoothly, all things considered. And as time goes on, we can see that Conrad and Lila clearly still have feelings for each other. And it's something that they're both willing to see through. Should they be able to forgive each other for the traumatic past. Oh, and the small problem that Conrad has been dating another local girl for the past several years…

Nicole:

Oh!

Meghan:

…and is supposed to be proposing to her at or around Christmas. 

Nicole:

Okay. 

Meghan:

But again, like I said, these two are still willing to work on things. 

Nicole:

Hmm. M

Meghan:

Mmm, you heard me. And that's where I'll leave it. 

Nicole:

Oh no. Okay. 

Meghan:

Not because I don't want to give spoilers. Cause I'm gonna spoil it. 

But if you should have any desire to read this milky green pepper, which reads like a gooey tourist to-do list, skip the rest of my diatribe. 

Nicole:

Okay, I love that we were both like not gonna spoil it, but yeah, so gonna spoil. 

Meghan:

As soon as you said it, I'm like, oh girl preach. Yeah, yeah. Uh yeah. So, if you care not, bring down the spoilage. 

Nicole:

Yes. 

Meghan:

We're gonna start with the least offensive to the most. So, we said maybe, maybe not doing food for this upcoming year, but food in this book. Swedish meatball plate. 

Nicole:

Oh, yeah, I gotta have that. 

Meghan:

Mm-hmm. Patty melt with onion rings. Mm-hmm. And scones. Most specifically, blueberry scone with cinnamon. 

Nicole:

I love that. Uh, just to backtrack to mine, I had fig jam and a shit ton of candy canes, which is why I was like, we gotta have a candy cane cocktail. 

Meghan:

All right, hear we go one more time. Don't poke your eye out. All right. Scents. We've been talking about smells and scents. There were quite a few in this book. Uh Conrad notices that Lila smells like the scent of Lily of the Valley. 

Nicole:

Ooh. 

Meghan:

And then at one point, I thought this was pretty funny. Uh, Lila says that Conrad um he brought with him the scent of musk, cheeseburgers, and the outdoors. An attractive elixir for Lila. 

Nicole:

Oh god. Oh, okay. I mean, we don't kink shame. 

Meghan:

Cheeseburgers and the outdoors. I'm like, girl. Anyway. 

Nicole:

Okay. 

Meghan:

Okay, things I could identify with in this book. 

There is a part where Conrad and his almost fiancé, Suzanne, are discussing the fact that he's still taking little jobs for friends and family. And she's frustrated with that because she knows he could be taking on much bigger projects. 

Nicole:

Yeah. 

Meghan:

And she actually goes into this entire diatribe about the fact that why is he taking on these piddly jobs when he should be doing millionaire mansions in the peninsula? This is a sore spot for me because that is literally what's going on in the entire peninsula. And normal people can't afford to build anything or buy anything because it's all being snapped at by millionaires who've got lots of money. 

Nicole:

Sure. 

Meghan:

There was another comment, speaking of property, where Melody mentions that the reason she has this business in downtown is because her husband's father sold them the building. That's the only way normal people get anything out there, is it's inherited from family. 

Things that annoyed me.  Some of the dialogue in this book is very formal. 

Nicole:

Okay. 

Meghan:

Examples. I booked a 7 a.m. flight to Green Bay International. No, you would just say, “Oh, I'm flying into Green Bay”. 

Nicole:

Yeah. Come on now. 

Meghan:

Or instead of, oh, do you need help with that? It's may I help? 

Other examples, you look well. Oh my, look what I've done. 

Or, and your brother, Luke? He knows who his brother is. You know who his brother is. Just be like, oh hey, how's Luke? 

Nicole:

Yeah. It it's a lot of stuff like that where I was just like, it doesn't feel natural. 

Something that just made me super uncomfy. Conrad notices Lila's painted toenails. And his inner dialogue says, He used to tickle those toes until she begged him to stop. Vomit. 

Nicole: 

Yeah, no thanks. 

Meghan:

Don't touch my toes. And finally, a thing that annoyed me, scissors. Not scissors. Hand me the scissors. She said, hand me the scissor. And I'm like, am I wrong? But I'm pretty sure you have to put the S on it. And I looked it up. Scissor is a verb. Like you can scissor something. 

Nicole:

Sure, but the actual object. 

Meghan:

It's a scissors. Plural. Plural. With an S. Just saying. All right. I'm not done. 

Nicole:

Oh, I didn't think you were. 

Meghan:

Because I have thoughts. I noticed this in another book I read in the last year. It wasn't a book for the podcast. And it was something I noticed in that book, and now I noticed it in this. So, I have to ask, why is it that there is sometimes our attention drawn to like ethnicity in a way that was not needed at all? So…

Nicole:

Yes. 

Meghan:

In this book, Lila is at the book signing and she's interacting with people. Marjorie's mother came over to say hi. And so, and so's dad walked over and congratulated her on the book. But then the next sentence is a set of beautiful triplets of Asian descent came over. And I'm like…

Nicole:

Nobody even talks like that. 

Meghan:

…it's out of place in this book in so many ways. It was like, unless there's a reason you're bringing it up because eventually these kids are bringing part of their culture, which is the inspiration for your book or whatever. Like that would make sense. It held no bearing. So, I didn't get it. I just thought that was so weird. 

Nicole:

Do you think it was an effort to be inclusive, but not really? 

Meghan:

I don't know. It just felt super weird. 

Nicole:

Yeah. 

Meghan:

It just feels weird. Moving on. 

I mentioned earlier that Melody's business called Window Shopping is the only fictitious thing in this book from a perspective of a business. This this author wasted no time name-dropping every single restaurant or business she could think of. And it was so distracting. 

Nicole: 

Oh, like a who's. 

Meghan:

I mean, I spent most of this book just highlighting like the places. 

Nicole:

Yeah. 

Meghan:

Because anytime she mentioned a new place and discussing it with my husband, Adam, he and I figured she probably had a list of all the places she wanted to mention. 

Nicole:

Yeah. 

Meghan:

And then made sure she shoved them in the book. 

Nicole:

Okay. But it wasn't natural. It was like a forced mention. 

Meghan:

Part of it was natural. Part of it was where it's like, “oh, she drove over to Sister Bay Bowl because she was really hungry for, you know, their fish fry on Friday.” And you'd be like, yeah, okay, sure. 

But some of it is so forced and leading to lines like this. Now, you know Wilson's ice cream? 

Nicole:

Yes. 

Meghan:

It is one of the most famous little spots in Door County. 

Nicole:

Yeah, yeah. 

Meghan:

If you look up Door County, it's the ice cream shop with the red awning. It's in Ephraim cute little shop, whatever. Conrad in his head. “Her skin as smooth and silky as the ice cream sold at Wilson's.” I was so disturbed by that. Which, first of all, it's just Cedar crust. So, get over yourself. But anyway, like I so weird. So weird. And we were like, is this a local person who's putting all this in the book to try and get tourists to be like, oh my God, I've seen that place. I have been there. 

Nicole:

Yeah. 

Meghan:

Or is this a tourist who's like, oh my God, I'm gonna talk about all the places that I feel like I know because I go once a year. 

Nicole:

Right, right, right, right. 

Meghan:

We'll get to that. 

Nicole:

Oh, okay. Okay. I but I'm wondering it. 

Meghan:

Yeah. We'll just get to it now. How's that? Okay. She's not from there. 

Nicole:

Oh.  I thought she was. 

Meghan:

No. I thought my first inclination was she's just trying to take tourist dollars by writing this kind of stuff. Oh, okay. No, she lives in Hartford and she's one of the tourists that comes up and gets in my way every year. Anyway. 

What was the trauma that Lila needed to be forgiven for that was so hard and she needed to really make amends for? It is that she decided to follow her career. And Nicole, worst of all, quote, “We broke up over the phone. Can you imagine?” 

Nicole:

Well, at least it wasn't a fucking post-it note. 

Meghan:

So yeah, she decided to follow her dreams of being an author, and she needs forgiveness for that. 

Nicole:

Oh, I don't like that at all. Also, that is a direct opposition to my book, where the whole point is she let people walk all over her and for once in her life stood up and said, No, I don't want to be a lawyer. I want to work in this little antique shop. But then the point was she didn't need to be forgiven for that because it wasn't wrong. 

Meghan:

Correct. Okay, so I'm not even done. 

Nicole:

Oh, God. 

Meghan:

I said we're going from bad to worse. 

Nicole:

Yeah, yeah. 

Meghan:

Here's the worst. Most of this book, they were doing this almost fiancé so dirty, Suzanne. They were trying to make her sound like the villain, and I was so frustrated. Suzanne's crime in this book is that she's also career driven. 

Nicole:

Oh God. 

Meghan:

Let's just start with early in the book when Lila is starting in the shop. She's told she's going to have to make scones. That's part of the daily thing for the shop. And she's like, oh my gosh, “I don't bake. I don't know how to bake.” And Melody's like, What? You don't cook for yourself? And Lila's response is, “I live in the city. There's like food on every corner. I don't need to. It's way more convenient to just buy it. So no, I don't really cook. I don't really bake”. Keep that in mind when we hear all of the problems that they're having with Suzanne. 

Suzanne is a real estate agent having a great conversation with Conrad, her almost fiancé, who she's been dating for years. She's discussing all these great business deals she's making, how well she's doing, how they they've got um somebody coming in from like the bigger corporate office who's taking her under his wing because he thinks she's so talented. She's very excited. Conrad's response to her is, “I hope that same passion will slide over into family life one day.” 

Nicole:

Ew. 

Meghan:

And she looks at him and she's like, What?  Because she's told him through their whole relationship, she doesn't want kids. She doesn't want to do that.

It's not her thing. Totally rude. 

Okay. Now we're going into again, Lila's an author. Conrad says something in his head about he couldn't remember the last time Suzanne had read a book. And then later on talks about how he never reads books. So, Suzanne's crimes so far. 

Nicole:

Conrad sounds like a douche. I'm just gonna say. 

Meghan:

So far, Suzanne's crimes are uh following her career, which is what Lila had done, not reading books, which is what Conrad does. Or doesn't do. Or doesn't do. Uh on one of the pages, he talks about how someday he really hopes that Suzanne will be able to take care of him the way his mother takes care of his father. 

His mother says to him, I don't know if she's the right fit for you. “If a woman can't make an over easy egg,”

Nicole:

Oh, shut the fuck up. They don’t say that in the book. 

Meghan:

Wait. 

Nicole:

Okay. 

Meghan:

You want the full quote? 

Nicole:

Yeah, give me the full egg quote. 

Meghan:

Okay, here's the full quote. “If a woman can't make an egg over easy, there's not much hope for more.” At which point in time, Conrad retorts to his mom, “uh, you've got to cut Suzanne some slack. She wasn't raised for cooking and cleaning”. His mom responds, “or bearing children”. Later on, he says, Suzanne doesn't enjoy cooking. And Lila's inner monologue is, Lila was beginning to wonder if Suzanne would even make a good wife for Conrad. Lila, bitch, you said you don't cook either. The only reason you're making scones is because your friend forced you to. 

Like, I love that you're enjoying making them now, but you being so snotty about Suzanne not cooking doesn't land right for me. 

Nicole:

Mm-mm. 

Meghan:

Okay. Then, friend Melody, her babies are born, which PS, you keep calling her your best friend. She didn't even tell you she was pregnant with twins. You show up in town and you're like, oh my God, you're pregnant. After the babies are born, Lila and Conrad start having a lot of inner monologues about how they can't wait to start a family either, and they'd like to put a baby in each other's arms. Lila at some point talks about her career, her 10-year, 10-book successful career as “chasing a hollow dream”. What the fuck? Like I said, they've been willing to see if things would work. So, they've been making out with each other. He's still with Suzanne. 

Nicole:

Yeah, Conrad sounds like a total fucking douche. He's gotta get some things under control and figure it out. But shouldn't they see where things are going here? 

I was getting real frustrated because they were doing Suzanne super dirty here. 

Nicole:

Yeah. 

Meghan:

At the end, there is a breakup between Conrad and Suzanne. And can I tell you, they made Suzanne the bigger woman and they let her walk out of there with some dignity. And thank God, because I was so irritated. Anyway, just to let you know, the last chapter and a half was just all about how God had put this together for them. And isn't it great that God had the perfect design and they're gonna be able to have a beautiful baby together at some point in time? Amen. Oh, don't follow your career. It's hollow. 

Nicoel:

Oh God. 

Meghan:

You would have hated this book so bad. So that is this book. If you want to read something that is this, here it is. 

Nicole:

Well, Megan, dare I ask, were you able to glean a romantic reminder from your book? 

Meghan: 

Yeah, don't cheat. That was that was the first thing I wrote down. Right there. It says, don’t cheat. 

Nicole:

Hey, that's fair. 

Meghan:

Thank you. But if I was going to do a real one. 

Nicole:

Oh no, that's a real one. 

Meghan:

It is a real one. But if I was gonna do one that's actually romantic and not just like, “hey, don't be a dick.” 

Nicole:

Don't be a douche. 

Meghan:

Yeah. Uh, there is a scene where Lila and Conrad go to Husby's and she's in awe at the menu. She freaking grew up there. She's in awe at the menu. Screw off. Anyway, they go to Husby's, she orders a patty melt with her onion rings, he orders his burger with his fries. And when they set the things down on the table, he immediately cuts his in half and starts shoving half of his burger onto her plate. 

Nicole:

Okay. 

Meghan:

Because this was something they had always done when they dated. 

Nicole:

Uh-huh. 

Meghan:

They go havesies on everything. 

Nicole:

Okay. 

Meghan:

And I was thinking about the fact that you always talk about girlfriend tax or wife tax. 

Nicole:

Wife tax, yep. 

Meghan:

And I was like, that is legit. Like you try and order things that you would like and enjoy and kind of share. So, there's that. 

Nicole:

All right. Uh, my romantic reminder. 

You know, at first, I thought the PJ sets was going to be my romantic reminder. 

Meghan:

Yeah. 

Nicole:

But it came down to something else in this book, Meghan.

Meghan:

Hmm.

Nicole:

Apologies are okay. There's some moments where apologies are needed as this couple navigates their personal traumas and history. And Harriet says it best. Apologies mean you want to try again. And that really spoke to me. I think many couples, myself and my husband, Bob included, can get wrapped up in who's right and who's wrong. And sometimes you don't feel like giving an apology or that you need to apologize or that you should have to apologize. But a sincere and heartfelt apology can mean so much to your significant other and really help in a relationship because it means that you want to keep working on the relationship. And ultimately that you really do care about the other person's feelings. 

Meghan:

Yeah, that's legit. 

Nicole:

Yeah. Don't cheat. 

Meghan:

Don't cheat. 

Nicole:

Don't cheat. Freaking apologize. But not for cheating because you shouldn't be cheating in the first place. 

Meghan:

You were just gonna say, dare I ask. I could hear it in your voice. 

Nicole:

Dare I ask. 

Meghan:

Dare I ask? Yeah, no, the answer is no. No boobs. 

Nicole:

No boobs. 

Meghan:

No boobs. 

Nicole:

No boobs. 

Meghan:

How do I keep picking up these books and missing the context clues? You guys, right here it says family friendly fiction. Right there. Do you see it? 

Nicole:

There's boobs in families. 

Meghan:

There are boobs in families. I used to work at family video, fun fact. And the back room, people would come in complaining, like, um, how can you have that kind of content when you're called family video? And our answer was always some people in the family like to watch that. But yeah, no, this no boob, no boobs. 

Nicole:

Wow. 

Meghan:

Cheating. Cheating is okay. But not mentioning boobs. 

Nicole:

No boobs.

 Okay. Uh the boobs fell on page 113. 

Meghan:

Did they legitimately fall? 

Nicole:

No, they did not. “The thin strip of fabric on her shoulder drops to her elbow. The curve of her breast, a tease through the material.”

 I liked it. It was sensual. 

Meghan:

It's nice. 

Nicole:

Yeah. Uh, do you think that paid attention, though, as I was reading when that happened? 

Meghan:

Uh, assuming you had to go back to find it. 

Nicole:

I did. And I got to the end of the book, and then I'm like, fuck, I forgot to look for the boobs. So, then I went back and I found some on page 165, and I was like, good God, don't tell me page 165 is where they fall. But no, it was page 113. 

Meghan:

Yeah, I got none. 

Nicole:

Yeah, that's just…

Meghan:

None boobs and yeah. I did say green pepper, didn't I? I said green. Milky pepper. 

Nicole:

You said green pepper multiple times. 

So, on the next episode of the podcast, we are continuing our end of the year feasting with our not shows. 

Meghan:

Yes. 

Nicole:

And we'll be discussing our year in review and some highlights as well. 

And then after that, in January, we are going to be doing a new year's get to know us again, get to know us better, where the fun and festivities will continue. More food, more booze, more books. 

Meghan:

All the things. 

Nicole:

All the things.

Meghan:

All the things. 

Nicole:

Well, the drinks are empty. 

Meghan:

We did it. 

Nicole:

We did it. 

Meghan:

Without losing an eye. 

Nicole:

Yes. I mean, it was precarious. 

Meghan:

It was. I mean, I thought for sure your right was going. All right, folks. Thank you for joining us today for Romance on the Rocks. Please like, subscribe, and follow. And if you are a fellow romantic, bookish biddie like us, please feel free to follow us and leave a review on Apple, iTunes, Spotify, YouTube, wherever you catch your podcasts. Until next time, just stay safe and know that you are loved.