FFP 57: Still Showing Up: A Father’s Hope in the Face of Alienation

🎙️ Summary

In this deeply moving episode, Pat shares his painful journey of losing his relationship with his twin daughters due to severe parental alienation following his 2019 separation. Despite an initially peaceful home life, hidden dysfunction and lack of communication in his marriage set the stage for escalating conflict. After his mother’s death, Pat was blindsided by his wife’s abrupt departure with the children and a swiftly obtained protective order based on false implications — including a manipulated interpretation of a household whiteboard note.

For a year, Pat endured supervised visits of only eight hours a week, while one daughter began exhibiting severe emotional distress and was prematurely prescribed SSRIs. Even after regaining 50/50 custody in 2020, subtle enmeshment and coercive control eroded his bond with the girls. His ex-partner’s refusal to comply with orders, misuse of medical decision-making, and weaponization of family alliances further deepened the alienation.

Despite legal victories, including a rare appeal win, and relentless self-advocacy, Pat has watched both daughters withdraw, with one ceasing contact entirely. Yet, he holds on to moments of hope, such as a recent instance when one daughter reached out after discovering her medication had been unlawfully increased. Pat continues to show up at school and soccer events, embodying the steadfast presence research shows is critical to future reunification.

Through this conversation, Pat’s story reveals the devastating psychological, legal, and familial toll of parental alienation,  but also the resilience, courage, and unwavering love of a targeted parent who refuses to give up.

📌 Key Takeaways

• Alienation is psychological abuse: It can manifest through manipulation, false allegations, medical abuse, and systemic exploitation.
• Protective orders are often weaponized, with little evidence required — creating long-term consequences for the targeted parent.
• Children’s rejection is not evidence of their true feelings; confusion, guilt, and pressure often drive their behavior.
• Court orders alone don’t solve alienation: Many alienating parents ignore them with minimal consequences, forcing targeted parents into endless litigation.
• Persistence and presence are powerful: Even minimal or one-sided efforts to stay connected can lay the groundwork for future reunification.
• Self-education is a vital tool: Learning legal language, statutes, and case law empowers targeted parents in a system stacked against them.

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🎙️ Let’s rebuild fractured families.

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