Healing Childhood Trauma

[Ep 57] Is It Okay To Not Be Ready For Therapy?

Lizandra Leigertwood Episode 57

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0:00 | 11:34

A lot of people assume not being ready for therapy means being in denial or lacking self-awareness.

That’s usually not the case.

In this episode, I’m talking about something I see all the time in early conversations with potential clients. The moment where I can tell someone isn’t quite ready for therapy yet. And it has nothing to do with how much they’ve reflected or how well they understand their past.

You can be insightful, emotionally aware, and still feel stuck in the same patterns.

Because the real shift in therapy isn’t just about understanding what’s happened to you. It’s about being willing to look at your role in what’s continuing.

Inside this episode, I talk about:

  • Why self-awareness alone doesn’t create change


  • The difference between focusing on other people and focusing on yourself


  • Why it can feel safer to stay focused on what others are doing wrong


  • The part of therapy that people don’t always expect


  • Why validation on its own isn’t enough to move things forward


  • The shift that tells me someone is actually ready for therapy


This isn’t about blame or taking responsibility for things that weren’t your fault.

But if your focus stays on other people needing to change, you’ll likely stay stuck. Even if you’re right.

If you’ve ever felt like you’re doing “all the work” but nothing is really shifting, this episode will help you understand why.

Lizandra is a relational psychotherapist who works with attachment, anxiety and relationship in St Albans and online. Learn more about her private practice New Frame Therapy and how you can work with her here.

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